Muse

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Hi, my name is Josh Groban and I feel downright giddy about being Conan O'Brien's friend. Now that's the right attitude. That is. It's an honor. No, it's not. But giddy is appropriate. It's a giddy honor.

Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend, sitting here with Sona Momsessian,

Matt Gourley. Hi. And Sona and I are just back from Morocco. Oh, that's funny. I didn't see you guys there. Oh. Oh, really? Were you there? Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. I'm just there on my own. Yeah. Wandering around. Yeah. That makes sense. No, we were shooting an episode of the travel series, Conan O'Brien Must Go. And we, Sonny, you were kind enough to come with me. Yeah. Because actually something came up on this podcast. You expressed a desire to get a certain product. Argon oil. A certain Argon oil. Yeah. and um and so i decided i'm gonna get you that argon oil by taking you to morocco yeah is it a spoiler to say if you got we can't say anything okay we can't say anything oh what we can tell you we're gonna tune in for that it wasn't like the ark of the covenant i mean you could probably get this pretty it's very readily available there apparently it's also readily available here oh you got scammed i got scammed uh we as we were like in the market hunting down the argon oil someone said you know yeah you can yeah you can get this you know on amazon and it will come from the same store that you found but anyway that ruins the magic of travel so uh but we had

well tell me what you thought sona oh i had so much fun i hadn't you know i used to travel when you do the travel shows. And I forgot how it's a lot of work.

It's a lot of work. It is a lot of work. You guys seem a little tired. Are you tired?

I woke up at 2.30 this morning. I didn't go back to sleep.

Yeah, because I was east for a while for other things. So I was on that time, and then we went to Morocco.

Yeah.

And so I haven't been on L.A. time in quite a while. Yeah. So yeah, I've been waking up at like 3 in the morning and like cleaning out cupboards. Yeah. I'll do when I wake up and it's pitch black outside and I know I'm up, I just start doing tasks that I would never do otherwise. Like I'll build a urinal, you know, first I'll fire the porcelain. I mean, I'll do all these crazy things because I think you have that you're you're revving. You want to be useful. You want to get something done. So, yeah, I've been actually mostly what I've been doing is organizing things that I haven't organized in a long time. And I mean, just, and my wife was away, so I was alone. It's me, the dogs, and the cats. And I'm just, they hear me in the garage banging away. Oh, my God. Doing stuff. Yeah, it's weird.

Productive? I'm not productive. What did you do when you were? I just watch clips of shows I like.

Oh, no.

And I just scroll on my phone in the bed. It's nice.

It's called doom scrolling.

It's not doom, because my algorithm's really fun. So it's like.

What's your algorithm?

My algorithm's a lot of just.

silly. It's like, you know, silly humor. It's a lot of really funny stuff. I don't know how to describe it. And then every once in a while, it's like takes me to a really dark kind of place on Instagram. And then like what? I don't know. There's just like like what's dark for you. I can't. I don't know. Sometimes I'm just like, how did this end up here? I can't. I can't think

of a real good example if you if you had an example. It would be so good if I had an example.

Is it like street fights, that kind of thing? I get a lot of fights. I do get a lot of fights, a lot of brawls and fights. And I love that.

That's your love language.

I love them. I know. And they make me, they fire me up. Like they get me really intense. Like, I don't know if you guys get that same. No, no, just me. Okay. You like watching fights? I love it. Sometimes I revisit fights.

I saw a clip recently that's been going around. This clip's been going around, which is sort of tangential to this. But as Cliff's been going around, they unveiled this robot and the robot comes out. It's one of these really impressive, you know, latest model robots. And it's coming out. It's doing all these cool moves and spinning and stuff like that. And all these families are around watching it, like applauding. And then it spins around and it kicks this little kid really hard in the stomach. And the kid doubles over and then kind of collapses. And I think the kid's okay. I hope the kid's okay. Is this real? Yeah, it's real, I think. I'm pretty sure it's real. and then the robot sort of stands up and then just starts to step back retreat and i've thought does that robot feel shame is it possible it feels shame and i was because i'm a human i was reading in oh that robot just must feel so much shame right now and then i realized it doesn't no it doesn't there's no way the robot's like that's darker than the street fights i know but we don't want it to feel shame robot kicks boy in the stomach it came up yeah oh i don't see this no it's not the kid's okay and I think the kid might have needed a kicking you never know I don't want to bum people out but I think it's okay

I know it's not funny right

hold on yes here's the guy he's like ha ha ha boink

oh no that's awful

and look at the robots must destroy to save

oneself so anyway

that kid is standing out a little too

far. What's that? That kid. Oh, so it's the kid's fault. Yeah, he asked for it. Well, you said he

had it coming. You're victim blaming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys' algorithm is turning you guys

into monsters. I, um, yeah, I said, go robot. That was my comment that I wrote in. Oh, no,

you shouldn't be standing. Do you remember when we were, I don't know if we should mention this, when we were in Armenia and there was a guy doing donuts. Yes. And there was a perimeter of people

around. Let me take the picture. We're in Yerevan, capital of Armenia. We're there for five minutes when we hear all this noise and excitement and we go to this big square where all these people are packed around watching and there's a guy in the middle who's accelerating really fast in a car doing donuts and everyone's just, it doesn't seem like an official performance. I think a guy was just doing donuts and everyone came to watch the guy do donuts because it's one o'clock and it's time for donuts. And everyone's, but there's no barrier between the people and the car and the guy doesn't really, he's not a professional. He doesn't know what he's doing. And then at one point he swings around and I think he hit a bunch of people.

He hit people with his car.

I think they were okay. Yeah. And I don't think people, you know, here, everyone would be like, okay, get everyone's number and everyone's going to sue everyone. There, they're just like, ah, that's what happens. Shake it off.

We're good. Get back around the perimeter. Yeah. Get back to donuts. It was crazy. Yeah. It didn't make the show that we were shooting, but it was. Oh, no.

No.

You didn't open it with that?

We are opening with the robot kicking the Chinese boy. I'm going to put that to the top of the show. Well, what was your reaction to that? I mean, I don't know. First of all, I saw that thing. It got sent to me. Instagram thought, Conan's going to love a Chinese robot kicking a kid in the stomach, which I don't endorse.

But now that you've probably watched it more than once, it's going to think that's what you want is robots kicking kids. Yeah. Well, I can...

I guess I'll just have to... I made my bed and I have to lie in it. it'd be great if all my feet was robots attacking children oh i'm sure i'm sure you can be now that you've said it out loud it probably will be all right then all righty then remember that

when that was a big thing all righty then ace ventura that was cool i'm just trying to those

but 30 30 years ago it was over 70 years ago yeah i just looked it up okay my guest do it Oh, let's get into it. Okay, let's do it. We should do it. You're not crisp with any of the sentence. You dribble a little bit. You should go. Well, anyway, so that's a hack. Intro.

And go.

Well, anyway, right, Sona?

Yep. Anyway, I got that one. Right, Sona? My guest today is a Tony-

Do we have a thought like when we might want to end this podcast? I think it's coming up real soon. Completely? It's coming up.

real soon because it's going to be taken away if we don't end it ourselves if we can't use this responsibly yeah they're going to take it exactly and intro thanks sona my guest today is a tony emmy and grammy nominated singer-songwriter his new album cinematic is a tribute to the silver screen and it's out now i am so happy he's here today he's a funny lovely fellow josh groban welcome josh i am so thrilled you're here we have had a connection over the years because as a very young man you came on my uh late night show i did and i thought this kid is very talented but also really funny oh man and you were sweet and i thought i don't think he's gonna make it uh but wouldn't it be nice if he did and i think i remember i said that to you it's what you led

with. Yeah. So I. My next guest probably won't make it. You really like to keep me on edge. Yeah, I was I was nervous already, but that really threw me. You've had this brilliant career and you

remain a really nice person and a really funny person, which leads me to my next topic of discussion, which is not long ago, I was tasked with hosting the Oscars. And I remember we had this idea, there needed to be someone who could sing this, you know, sing my tribute. And immediately, I think two of us at the same time said, wouldn't it be great if Josh Groban would do it? And I remembered having a thought, oh my God, Josh Groban, if he doesn't do it, I don't know that we can do this piece because that's the best person to do it. And I know that whoever, if you weren't available because I, we knew that you were touring. Yeah. Who was the second choice? This is not going to make you happy, but it was comedian Patton Oswalt. Oh, Patton. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, apparently he's in a terrible voice. I'm imagining him in the night gear right now. No, there was this, that's just it. There was no second choice. There was no second choice. And I know that if we had found someone, I'd have been mad the whole time that it wasn't you and probably tanked the piece. So we reached out to you. We found out that you might be amenable. We should have a conversation. And the next thing you know, I'm on a Zoom with you and you're in Tokyo. I was in Tokyo. There is no cooler experience

than being in Tokyo, first of all, to begin with, and then having a Zoom with you about doing this bit. Nothing will top this. Well, here's the weird thing, too. I thought, remember, we got on the

Zoom and I said, you must be on tour. And Josh said, no, they have the best sex toys here. That's right. Yeah. And this is where I like to shop for my sex toys. And then for 20 minutes, you were showing me these... Oh, I had a bag. I had two

Trader Joe's bags full of dildos and suction cups and tassels. No, no, no. Let me continue. No, it was really... It liked tourism

for me. Yeah, yeah. The thing is, no one builds shit like the Japanese. True. But you kept turning them on and they were like... A lot of robotics. Yeah, a lot of robotics.

One of them had a song similar to the one you wanted me to sing. It was a... so i kind of said it like you know like this but anyway we had this so the next thing you know

we're rehearsing you're you killed it we do it at the oscars you were great and then here's a weird thing about show business you killed it and people really like the piece and people were so happy that suddenly you're there i love anyone who's legitimizing a completely illegitimate piece of comedy so the fact that you were part of it yeah um with your amazing voice but you're singing these incredibly stupid lyrics about how I'm the greatest ever. And it's over. But from my perspective, I'm on top of a mountain holding onto a fake Falcon and being pulled off the stage. And I wave to you and you kind of wave back and you go left and I go right. And then I'm into the show and I never see you again. I know. And it's weird because I know that if I had been watching that, I'd think, oh, cool. Now Conan and Josh Grubin get to hang out backstage and trade old more stores. Go to a lounge. No, I don't see you anymore. Yeah. So much of TV is bits over and then you're off to Belgium to do a concert. And, you know, I'm off. I don't know where I go, but

to sleep for a week. I did. I did sleep for a week. I knew though, going into it that, I mean, if I could see you even for a second, that would be great because your responsibilities on a night like that. Right. Leading up to it. And then on the night. Right. And you make it look easy. I mean, it really was. I was happy that this was scheduled on the calendar so we could catch up.

Yes. You know, this is the only reason I'm having you. The only reason. And first of all, this will never no one will ever hear this. There's no tape in the machine, said the idiot who fundamentally didn't understand how things work. But it is really nice to get to talk to you.

And I, uh, I was listening to the album you did cinematic and it's all these different amazing movie songs, songs from great movies. And I was listening to you sing the Godfather theme and it has lyrics in Sicilian. that's right and i didn't realize that the godfather had lyrics the godfather theme me neither and i was like this is amazing and i translated the lyrics i used i translate and it's just going over the plot of the godfather that's right it was before the godfather it came out no no it came out at the same time as the godfather and no but the lyrics are not imaginable it sounds like such a beautiful song but all the lyrics are you shouldn't let your wife in italy start the car she will blow up and her body will go real far never sit with your back to a window

enjoy the clams enjoy the clams yeah incredible uh just really really getting into the nitty

gritty it is there's going to be a sequel and you'll see it's pretty good watch number one and two but three maybe well it's understood three's a mistake three's a mistake yeah i go up for that one yeah um but i was listening to it and um just uh unchained melody oh yeah there's i mean there's a bunch of songs there and also your skyfall oh thanks is fantastic thank you so i was listening to all these and i was thinking first of all the musicians you have behind you it's insane

90 pieces, 90 players in London at Air Studios. And singing in the room with them is like nothing else. There's so much about my job that is just isolated. You're in a hotel room, you're in a dressing room, you're in front of a microphone. To be in the room with them playing is like walking on a cloud. Because, you know, if you mess up, they have to start again. If they mess up, you start again. And it's just an incredible experience to sing these melodies with them. And the Sicilian came because I rehearsed it in Italian. There's an English language version, an Italian language, and a Sicilian version. Are you fluent in Italian? No. I learned these languages as a singer because I grew up learning these art songs. And I would sing in French and Italian and Spanish. I don't speak the language fluently, but I learn them, of course, when I'm singing them. But I sent in a demo of the Italian version to Coppola and the team. He was being honored for the AFI lifetime achievement. And he asked me to do it for that. And I sent in a demo, and I was really nervous. And I worked, like, for two weeks on it. And then they sent me back a note saying like, oh, no, no, Mr. Coppola would like it in Sicilian. And so that is when I realized that there was such a thing, looked it up. There was. And yeah, you learn something new every day. It was beautiful, though.

Did you ever think ever for a second, you know, having your agent call and go, yeah, that's not happening, Coppola. Do you know what I mean? Because I send that response back all the time, but it's about much smaller things.

Oh, OK.

Yeah. Can Conan be there for the kid's birthday party at three? And I'll say, no, I can be there at 315. but I want my $200 up front.

Just to throw your weight around. Yeah. Oh, you want Sicilian? Now you get gibberish. That's what you get. Because what's really the difference? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you going to say?

No? Well, I'm sorry. Conan! I think all foreign languages are just gibberish.

Oh, no! No! No?

Huh. I'm sorry. I thought everyone spoke American. Oh, my God.

Canceled, canceled, canceled. Are we recording this? No, we're good. We're good.

I'm pretty sure America was the first language, said the idiot. And then everyone lost their way. Oh, goodness. So I want to talk about your origin story because it really fascinates me. When you're a kid, you obviously, you're like singing in your room. I think you're aware that you have this thing you can do, but you probably don't know what its value is or its merit. Yeah. And then you're 13 years old and you're in a choir. Yes. And do I have this right? The choir teacher's like, uh, you in the back. Exactly right. Uh, why don't you come forward? I want to hear you a little better.

Well, what he did was he's, which all great teachers do is he recognized that there was a student in his choir who really needed the push. I was not, I mean, I'm a ham on stage, but I am like the most introvert on stage. And when I was a kid, I was really introverted, had a really hard time making friends. My grades weren't great. I did ADD and didn't even know about it. So like I was a little bit lost and I was in the back of the class and I was in the back of the choir and I loved being part of it. But he heard that there was a little bit of a talent there. I was, by the way, 13 years old. My voice still hadn't changed. So there was a talent there, but it was very, it was very high. So it was a real gamble for him to say, I'm going to put this kid in the front and I'm going to give him a song. And he gave me this song, Swonderful, George Gershwin's song, Swonderful, Swonderful. And I sang it with all my might because it was an assignment. He knew that if he didn't give it to me as a class thing, that I would never do it for myself. Right. So in pushing me to the front, he gifted me with a moment that changed, even if I hadn't gone into it professionally, a moment that changed my growth forever. You know, the kids, like, the next day were like, wow, man, that was, even the bully was like, bro. Yeah. I'm going to still beat you senseless. But I'm going to pause beforehand to compliment you on your incredible range. Voice of an angel, now get in that locker.

Could you do it? Wow. Could you do it yourself? I like this bully who just phones it in. Get in that locker. Well, that's basically. Can you pull your own underwear up so that it rides into your crack? Thanks a lot. What are you doing? I'm on Amazon.

At least they had to do it in person back then. Now it's also anonymous online, you know. I didn't like it, but I respected it. Bullies today's Zoom people. Oh, they just phoned it in.

Hey, oh yeah, what's up? Thanks for taking... Yeah. Can you stick your face in a urinal? Yes, sir. This message is brought to you by Original Penguin. Original Penguin's been a staple of American style since 1955, known for blending vintage-inspired flair with an effortless original cool. This May and June, the focus is on Father's Day and preparing for summer style. The latest drop features bold prints, vibrant colors, and new swimwear. It's the perfect time to update the wardrobe with pieces that say vintage cool without trying too hard. I've had a couple of Penguin shirts for years. I wear them all the time. I always get compliments.

You look great in those Penguin shirts. They, like, make you look buff.

Yeah, they make me look buff. I think it's because there are muscles sewn in to the chest. Oh, okay. No, I'm just kidding. But they do. They look great. They feel really good. It's a timeless classic. So head over to OriginalPenguin.com and use code CONAN for 20% off your first order. Terms apply. Original Penguin. Be an original. Hey, this summer, if your group chat's thrown around, we should get away. Consider Scottsdale, Arizona yeah sure it's warm that's kind of the point isn't it because summer in Scottsdale comes with some very cool perks like luxury resort rates starting at just $109 a night for a luxury resort yeah sign me up ease into your trip and get your zen on with sunrise yoga evening stargazing and generous summer specials at area spas area spas sign me up or book a sunrise tea time at a world famous golf course at rates way less than usual. Plus, summer is the easiest time to land a reservation at Scottsdale's award-winning restaurants. You know, the ones people usually humble brag about getting into. Do you ever do that? Yeah, I sure do. I'm like, yeah, I got into that resort. Sure I did. Yeah. No shortage of indoor air-conditioned spots to visit museums, boutiques, art galleries, and the Southwest's largest shopping mall. I've driven through Scottsdale. It's very nice there. I like Scottsdale. It's fun. It's a good time. Visit summerinscottsdale.com and start planning your trip. so much i'm looking forward to this summer me too you know what i'm talking about first of all july 4th is going to be the 250th anniversary of the united states of america that's a big deal and just as important some pretty big soccer games headed our way sport i don't want to get too specific but let's say some pretty big soccer games are coming our way on a global scale on a global scale that's all we'll say so much to celebrate this summer so you got to keep a classic with Miller Lite. Miller Lite has been a true American Pilsner and the original light beer since 1975. Were you even alive then? No, I was not. Yeah. I don't think, I think that's good because you couldn't handle the beginning of the Miller Lite era. No. It's too, it's too iconic. Okay. Here's my summer. Okay. Yeah. Hang with my buddies. Yeah. Hey, this is a really good iconic soccer game that's happening that unifies all the different nations of the world. What is it? I don't have time to tell you, but let's have some Miller Lite. Clean, finished, refreshing, easy to drink, and when it's hot outside, nothing feels better going down than an icy, cool Miller Lite. It's an all-American summer, and it starts with all-American beer. Miller Lite. Go to millerlite.com slash Conan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, wilwaukee wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs for 12 ounces i love stories where people figure it out i'm also picturing the teacher like okay let's

music teacher okay yeah you next what is it jay groban josh josh all right let's hear it

you know their glasses shatter what is this damn name

anyway yeah it was well okay pavorati let's hear this guy i gotta get to lunch his name is actually his name is richard barrett and i invite him to every concert that i do

because because still make him pay i still that's a trick i like to do ah my old comedy teacher

it's seven hundred dollars for that seat i'd like to offer you the opportunity to buy tickets to my new show. Uh, no, he's, uh, he, he was, he was not that guy. He was super, uh, you know, excited to teach and still teaches. And, you know, not only did he pull me out from the back, but he knew that I liked to play piano. He knew that I was kind of gravitating towards the drum set in the back. So he's like, I'm going to leave the music room open. So just whenever you need to go in, have an escape, get in there. And, you know, it having access to all that just changed absolutely everything for me. Do you have perfect pitch? Can you identify a note? Not, I don't have perfect. I can play by ear. If I listen to something, I can sit down at the piano and figure it out. I actually can't read music. Everything that I've learned how to play. No, it's true. That's the only reason you're here.

What the hell? Adam. Our lesson's going to be really disappointing. This is where I push the button and you're ejected out of the Larchman office. Wee! You land in a parked car.

I parachute down in front of Noah's Bagels. Oh, man.

Well, the good news is I can get a great lox and cream cheese. You land fracturing your pelvis but immediately order a schmear on a poppy seed bagel. That's right, I said schmear, Sona. They come out with pickles, Conan, huh? Yeah, you know. You probably found out you couldn't read music. Harrison Ford was here and I found out he couldn't read music and I ejected him. Oh, man. So you start singing and then you have this moment, another pivotal moment is you're 17. Someone introduces you to David Foster, a famous producer, arranger, and he asks you to do this thing at the Grammys, it's like you were a kid.

It was so close together, like that the shy 13-year-old whose voice was on the brink of changing was 13. And then the call came in when I was 16. Right. So the time period between absolutely having no clue, wearing this coat that was so big on me and getting this call to be part of something that was very professional. What was it? It was something, a big thing at the Grammys. David had heard me sing at a charity event that he asked me to do, plucked out of high school. I sang a song from Phantom of the Opera. It was like the biggest day of my life. But I went back to class. I didn't think anything else would come from it. So when he called me and he said, I'm at the Grammys, I've written the song. It's called The Prayer. It's for Celine Dion and Andrea Bocelli. And Bocelli is stuck on a tarmac in Germany. He can't be here in time for the rehearsals. Would you step in and would you sing this for Celine with Celine until he shows up? Do you mind?

Do you mind?

That's just insane. What? And I, being an idiot, I mean, really, 16 years old, I did not have stars in my eyes to be a solo artist. I was like, I was, I wanted to go to theater camp. I wanted to be, I wanted to worship the throne of Sondheim. And I wanted to like, that's what I wanted to do. So the idea of like, like the music business, being a singer with those kinds of people, I was only thinking, can I do this well or not? And even though I was the hugest fan of Celine, I said to him, I don't think I'm the right person for this gig. I was so insecure. And Andrea Bocelli is like one of the great tenors of all time. And I was very much like living in my baritone world. I was not singing those very high notes. So I said, I think you can do better. I said, thank you so much for asking me. I'm really honored, but I think you can do better. And my mom's yelled at me from downstairs. I was, of course, still living at home. And she said, who is that? And I said, oh, that was David Foster. Oh, oh, what did he want? Well, it's this Grammy rehearsal as it happens. And Celine Dion is there and Bocelli isn't. He asked me to come and sing. And well, what did you say? I said, well, obviously I said, I'm probably not the right person for the job. And they kind of went, oh, all right well all right then um and i could tell they were disappointed david foster called me back and he said i don't think you understood me get your ass to the shrine auditorium three he nobody had turned him down before so he said get get over here he barely gave me a pass my dad shows up with me at the side door security's like who are you i said i'm here to sing with celine dion yeah hi i'm 17 yeah and this is my dad yeah and we're here for celine dion which way to the microphone and you know and like the security guard had to like walkie-talkie another guy with a walkie-talkie who you know and so on and so far and against finally ken earlick who produced the grammys came out and grabbed me and you know it was just i was so new to it that it was such another world I didn't really permeate how important that moment was to be for me. I just wanted to do a good job. I didn't want to embarrass myself. Celine, of course, came out and then I realized how real it was. But the thing about Celine in that moment was she knew that David Foster was doing a thing, that this wasn't just a job. She knew because she'd been there at my age that David was actually providing a door and an opportunity to prove myself and that it was a lesson and that this was.

this was a moment this was not just a rehearsal right and so she kind of like clocked it and she's like oh oh got it josh so nice to meet you kiss kiss could see i was nervous and she made her sound check about making me comfortable she grabbed my hand she's like we're gonna do this and when you look at me and you have the italian then i'll sing the english we got this just look at the prompter and look at the you know she was like pep talking me out there and i know now that i've done a lot of sound checks for tv shows i know how precious those you i mean you know from just doing you always get much like i'm sure such little time allowances for celine dion

but i noticed that you know it's quick yeah if you're doing the oscars the and it's only appropriate like barbara streisand all the rehearsal time she needs and then i'll say i've got a thing where i i catch a fake giant bird on a mountain with josh grobe and they're like you've got eight seconds yeah that's lunch yeah you have eight seconds to get it right and then

get out of here who are you a host got it yeah yeah um it's it's quick and so now that i know like that and that was a big song that she was about to sing really hard and that was a big moment it was nominated for a grammy and oscar so the fact that she took her precious time when many superstars of that time would have looked at me as like stand-in singer all right do the best you can let's get through it you know i might not have decided that this business was for me had

she been me even though it you were for rehearsal only yeah right yeah and so well ken erlich said

to me after i rehearsed you know we're still looking to see if bocelli can make his flight so buy go buy a suit in this lunch break go buy a suit on their i mean this is this feels so old timey like this feels so like the old but now you can tiktok yourself and get yourself on you know you can find an audience right but that idea of like you know the kid the kid did okay go down to men's warehouse there's one down the street and you know i've got a tailor here's his name and You know, it's it was like, I got to get a suit. I looked at my dad and I said, I'm not like I'm not I can't do this on camera. Like this is not I'm not ready for this. Thankfully, Bocelli showed up. I got to meet him. He wound up doing the song and I got to have a really good story. Did you get to tell Bocelli? You were OK.

You thought I nailed it.

I was.

He's a notoriously bad singer.

No, I was just I was so grateful that he was going to finally go out there and nail it. My dad did have a camcorder video of it. And, you know, now, of course, you know that filming a soundcheck for something like the Grammys or the Oscars is just absolutely no, no. And and Celine saw that he was filming and the security said, you can't do that. And she said, no, no, let him let him film that. So that was, you know, it just was she was the absolute best that day. And, you know, but but then 10 years later, I got to sing that song on the Grammys with Bocelli. So we had like a kind of a full circle and I've sung it with Celine a few times since then. So it was just it's wild how those things. Do you remember your 16 year old get a suit moment? Well, mine came later. Mine came when I was 48.

Still involved a suit. No, I do remember. I mean, the story I have that kind of lines up a little bit with that was obviously I had these other all these other adventures beforehand. But when I, you know, living out here in L.A. and and getting a chance to audition to possibly be considered to be a late night host replacing David Letterman, which seemed insane. but I they said show up in Burbank at this time and I didn't have anything to wear so Lisa Kudrow who's you know my my best friend at the time she said hey let's I'll take care of this and she took me to Fred Siegel and picked out a the worst coat and I'm sorry Lisa and we've talked about this before but I'm a very pale person I know now that I need to wear blue she was like oh this looks good and it was this linen floppy jacket that was very like almost pure white maybe a little off-white and so i put it in the back of my taurus and some transmission fluid that was got on it and stained it so i like turned the and i walk out and i mean people have i think looked up you can look up the footage of me auditioning i'm like hey everybody and i've got the floppy hair. And then, you know, I look like I'm trying to pretend to be Don Johnson in Miami Vice after he repaired a car. Could you see the stain on the... I don't think you could, but... And so you don't just have one moment like that. You have, in my case anyway, many of them and

they continue. Yeah. And, you know, they say luck is preparation meets opportunity. And, you know, these moments, these points of light continue. It wasn't just that moment. It's like, it's... I can think of that was a tentpole of a moment that I didn't know then, but the domino effect happened after that. Now, most people, I'm not most, but I'll say many, many

people in your situation, that's where the self-medication starts. That's where alcohol, drugs, people get into that kind of behavior for a reason, because they feel like a lobster that's been shelled, but is alive, you know, and everything's too, literally too raw. You didn't have that.

Well, that's where my sex tourism to Japan started. I will say, that was a somewhat less dangerous way to...

Okay, this is why I'm happy. That quote, if anyone missed the top, that quote out of context is very... Well, that's just bad news for you and your team.

If this were in England, that would be the headline of The Guardian. The Daily Mirror. Yeah, Daily Mirror, yeah. Wait a minute. Um, no, but I, I, but I, I was, uh, I, you know, I battled all, I battled all this stuff. I had anxiety. I had depression. I had, you know, and you know, I had, I had certain medication, medication, but you knew that you couldn't drink because of your voice. So the pressure of needing to sound really good out there, I think kept me from getting into dangerous territory because ultimately the feeling of not doing great out there was worse than how good any of that stuff might feel in the interim.

But can I just say, heroin would not have affected your voice. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Does it affect your voice? Because if not, this is something we should explore. Yeah, no, no, no. No, you should not advocate for heroin. Is that what you're doing? Well, I'm just saying, I'm a little shocked that that wasn't proposed to you by your team. Just to take the edge off. My team, Adam Sachs over there, is constantly saying, you know, I don't think your comedy timing would be hurt by some of these, like a fentanyl or something and i'm like oh i'm telling you adam there's not a day that goes by adam what the fuck why come on oh he's not going on mic now the mic is staying so far away from he's got that he just took the mic and buried a hole dug a hole and buried it i'm very glad you didn't get any of those drugs which by the way i think are very bad oh good good good i fixed it

yeah you did my genre of music though my genre of music though was not like i did not have that

crew around me like it was you know what about your roadies yeah it's like hey man yeah you gotta bump a line man hey man your ave maria was really killer but you seem a little tense yeah i was with van halen but now groban this is what i think you should do yeah yeah musical theater's fine but

heroin's better you know it's like an episode of like remember cop rock sure yeah everything i relate back to cop rock just everything's a musical i imagine like a guy like guy in a trench coat going you sang the high note but here's some meth yeah i did not have that singing guy in the trench coat like after my classical scales saying like you know it's fascinating to

me that um i'm glad you brought this up because i have i have gone no we're going to get off the drugs but more specifically into into musical theater because and musicals that i've always to this day i can never reconcile i couldn't as a kid and i can't now as an old man i can't reconcile the what do you think we ought to do i don't know it's kind of tricky yeah sure but maybe we should i'm always like what the hell happened what is it takes you out of it yeah yeah and i'm i'm i'm always want i would love to be in a musical where someone does that and other

people are you know what are you doing yeah retro scratch yeah exactly yeah but well there's two camps of people there's there's those that just think it's absolutely ridiculous and don't get it at all you perhaps chalamet um and uh you know i'm not putting you both in the same uh

well you know i too am with it i'm with one of the kardashians as well why is that clown singing a high note i know ridiculous you know uh and then those that are

totally swept away i was one of those kids that was totally swept just totally swept away by it and i i the combination of music and story and that you could break into a song and that that The singing of that song would somehow tap into some deeper way of expressing the story. Yeah, I just I suspended that disbelief.

I do make an exception for the I'm obsessed with the Music Man and I'm obsessed with the You Got Trouble song. And I feel like I was put on this earth to do that. And someday in my life, I need to do it because I, you know, and I wrote a Simpsons episode about it. And it's something that I just and and then later was asked because I know you've worked with the Hollywood. men's gay choir yes that's right gay men's course of los angeles that's right gay men's course and um what did i say butchered the hollywood gay the hollywood foreign choir what did you do i think they're believe me i've worked with them and their name is the gay hollywood that's right choir that men frequent that's what it's called frequent and guys hello but i got to I got to work with them. Speaking directly to them. That's your camera. You're going to look it right in the camera. Hey, Holly, what a hell-oh, it's me. David, I'm an ally. I'm so out of control. You're unstoppable. What do I say to you every day?

He called me once. He'll always just text me ally. And once I was in the car with my boyfriend, and he called me because he knew we were in the car. and I answered and he just screams

ally

because then I can say later on I went on record I'm just I need to be stopped I'm an ass but they I performed the Troubles not the Troubles song the Monorail song which was my version of it at the Hollywood Bowl for this Simpsons anniversary which was one of my all time favorite moments in show business and they were absolutely fantastic and really funny so i've always thought oh my god okay i need to figure out a way where i get airlifted into a a version of music man and i just get to do that song and

then i'm airlifted out i mean i don't know after the beef you clearly have with musicals i don't

know if that's gonna happen do you distancing myself also from chalamet i also my my beef is all with just ballet yeah i'm down with musicals i do love musicals i just not a beef it's just that I could never make the logical lead. Right. But the music man is where the line is okay.

Yeah. I love that, like, that's the one where you're like, but that guy with his little traveling salesman box, when he breaks into song, I believe it. You know why?

Why? Because it's that Rex Harrison thing of he's kind of talk singing. Ah, okay. You know, now listen, my friend, it's all that kind of thing that makes more sense to me because I often start talking to people in that musical rhythm and yelling at them. I mean, I do. You could see why I would want to do a song Where it's like, now gather around everyone And I'll tell you what, you have to know That as opposed to I wish to have a mayonnaise sandwich Well, it's not trying to be real Why can't you take a second and go Conan, you have a beautiful voice I've given him every fucking opportunity I wish to have a mayonnaise I mean, come on That was You know what's crazy? He's wiping blood from his eyes. The blood that comes out of Josh's eyes when he hears music being butchered.

That was hairs on the back of my neck. Fantastic. What a beautiful Irish tenor you have. Their hairs on the back of your neck. That was stunning.

Not your hair. It's just other hairs on the back of your neck. They go all the way down. I'm kidding. Stop it back there. All of you cackling. We should address, I want to address the Timmy Chalamet thing for just a second because he was right there in the first row when we were at the Oscars. And I think, I do, I think he's an amazing actor. Yeah. And I actually have met him a bit and know him. I really don't know him that well, but I think he is a really good guy. I really do.

It got piled on.

It became a hat on the hat. Yeah, I'm going to take a second. And I've, of course, I was, I thought that was okay. Maybe that wasn't a great thing to say, but, you know, I-

It ultimately helped.

Yeah.

Ticket sales skyrocketed. I mean, like, the thing I took from it like, all right, people are going to have their their hot takes, their opinions as people should. And then you can disagree with it or not. But ultimately, like if what he said meant that everybody went, yeah, stinks, uncool, whatever it is. And then sales dropped. Well, then that would be one thing. But no, everybody like ballet companies were saying, use promo code Chalamet. Yeah. Yeah. If you want two for one tickets, everybody was, you know, sometimes you need a heel for everybody to go. Now, wait a minute. Yeah. And he actually he elevated it. People and then he had and then Misty Copeland came on the show our bit was was written before he said those things yes right so we you know people were asking me did you do that you were right in front did you do that and I said no we wanted to do it anyway we came up with that

before that whole thing but anyway just you know just a moment to say he's alright

also and I think

he's an incredible actor incredible actor incredible very very talented and talented actor and who amongst us hasn't said things I mean truly

you did this interview This interview alone, you've said a lot of things.

Can I just say, I want to double down on this. I believe when, at the beginning of time, everyone spoke American. Okay, there we go. Oh my God. I thought you were going to do the heroin thing again. And also, what's wrong with fentanyl?

And also, use promo code Conan for your black tar heroin needs. Let me tell you.

Hey, so let's talk about this. You were always interested in comedy. That's always been an interest of yours. I know you're a talented mimic. At some point, because you are a renowned singer, you get this opportunity to be in the office, voice on The Simpsons. You get to start playing on those little playing fields of comedy, and you have a facility for it, and you really enjoy it. And that must just been, I mean, you have fans who are comedy fans of yours. Don't know that I sing. Who don't know you sing. Right, that's very true. And if they're just tuning in right now, they think, oh, they have the comedian Josh Groban on. Oh, I'd be honored. And then they're like, oh.

Oh, wow. He sings. Yeah. In fact, thank you for that opportunity on the Oscars to present my singing voice.

Yeah. I thought you should finally be heard out. Done wonders for my streaming. Yeah.

So I talked about those first years of my career where I just felt like a shell of myself. Part of that was because I felt like a huge part of my brain was just going untapped. And, you know, in high school, I got to work with that choir teacher. But then I also got to start an improv troupe. they i had a free period and we had a black box theater and they and when everybody else was just having snacks and you know what do kids do rolling the dice and i don't know um wow you really i had no social life you know i had no social life you really had no childhood you know when you know they were trading you run down the street in your buckle shoes smoking cloves and you know i don't

know what they were doing yeah like one of those wheat rims that goes down the street that's it

yeah i was playing i was playing hoop and stick all the way home hoop and stick already at a butter churn and uh yeah and uh so they said you got anything you want to do we got an hour free period and i asked my theater teacher i said can we do improv can i do improv i'd taken some classes this is actually a very funny side quest is that in the valley there's a theater called um connection la connection comedy theater that's it in the valley and i was one of the youngest people they had they had their taking classes there they now have a very strange painting of me on their wall if you drive down i think it's victory or one of the streets in burbank uh i think it's next to like there's a trophy shop on one side and a gun store on the other and then there's this improv building and it's got like me and will ferrell who i guess went there and uh matthew perry's faces on there and but but we all look like bizarro versions of ourselves any tribute painting

of someone is by definition weird.

The faces are kind of bent and weird, you know? There are no paintings of me anywhere as a singer. But for some reason, LA Connection was like, this guy, this improv master, we must have him on there. But improv was like an escape for me. So I started there. And then, you know, for the vast majority of the beginning of my career, the label and everybody else was like, you have to be the guy who's on the billboard all the time. You cannot stray from the brand of singing these serious songs and being the serious guy on the pedestal because people are getting an emotion from the songs and you don't want to ruin that. Honestly, it started with Kimmel. He gave me, he said, you know, because I wasn't getting couch time. And you, giving me couch time, like being allowed to talk and show my personality was not something as a singer you normally get to do. Kimmel said, we've got a panda that is not mating right now. I think it's Ling Ling the panda. Would you do a skit where you sing a ballad trying to make the pandas horny? right and i was like here we go and away we go and so that was the first thing work that's there's a little little josh the panda it's uh it's uh no there was i think i think that worked i don't know but then he had me back to sing kanye west tweets right and then he had me back to sing trump's tweets back when we we could laugh and um those were good times and so just i think and then friends that i knew that did these shows said we've got a funny little thing or we want you to play yourself in a bizarro way yeah and i just always said yes i said yes to all of them. Because for me, it was my way of just kind of exercising some of that stuff that I felt I wasn't able to be myself. It's freeing. It's fun. So yeah, that's important. Do you have, this just

fascinates me, but let's say you're singing something like, you know, Unchained Melody or some song where you have to hit these heights and you know those notes are coming. Do you ever get in your head about that? Or are you just at this point, no, oh, I know exactly what to do there, which I'm sure you do. But when you have to take it up several octaves, you might be training for

a long time. You might technically know that the notes are in your range, but it's, it's takes a lot of kind of practice mentally to get yourself to a place where you just decide to say, and it's not because you don't care, but there has to be a certain amount of fuck it because, because if you care that much, oftentimes the mind and the voice are connected and you're going to get tense. And And then the more you say, God, I hope it comes out. The sick thing about it is the more you're going to regret how it came out.

I don't know if you're aware of this, but you sometimes say fuck it out loud. Oh, did I? No, no, no, no. What I'm saying is I watched you do the national anthem once. And when it came to Rockets Red glare, and this was in front of a huge stadium filled with children. You said, fuck it. And the Rockets Red.

And it's like, don't do that. When you're timing the jets, sometimes you have to vamp. And it's just, I tried to stretch. You know, you see the camera guys going, you know, doing this and it's like, fuck it, all right.

I think you should start when you're going to hit a really great, impressive note saying, watch this. Just before you do it, just, you break out of the song and go, watch this. you know there was a singer i won't name him but there was a singer kind of there was a tenor that i used to see that was kind of coming up around the same time and he used to do something before he did high notes where he like he'd be about to sing the high note he'd go yeah oh no and i just would go get this here we watch this i'm like i don't i don't like that at all yeah i just yeah yeah check me out if i did that if i went right definitely wouldn't come out like that's a sure fire away to jinx a high note.

I would completely go this other guy's way.

Yes, you would.

I would go the other way and glorify. My favorite thing is to say, check this out, and then fail. I think it's the funniest thing in the world to me is watch this, and then wipe out.

And then completely wipe out. I think that's very funny. Yeah, you don't start your Oscar monologue with check this out. All right, here we go.

All right, what says, hey, you ready to laugh? Yeah. Watch this. Oh God. Yeah. Did you see that that movie is so-and-so? Yeah. So-and-so, you know, boy, that would be

awful. That's a good joke, by the way. I did have one performance where I was kind of sick. I was with David Foster. By the way, I should preface by saying he's been the most supportive and he's been a great mentor. But there was one time where I think he knew that I should just buckle up and sing the note. And I was being kind of a baby about it. I had a cold and I said to David, this song, please, will you just make sure I don't sing? Can I just not sing the note tonight? Can I sing around it? Yeah, yeah. No problem. No problem. We get out there, gets up to the note. He's got a mic at the piano right and he goes here comes the money note right before and that was a lesson learned that was like and by the way because i was so surprised that he said it popped right out

sure and it was like you know tough love yeah why yeah a lot of phlegm got spit out in that moment yeah um okay there's another question so i'm driving around listening to cinematic and uh you know the breakfast at tiffany's theme uh moon river which it's what you do with your dad and then it it evolves into bickering at one point it does you apparently left the milk out and it was overnight those dishes will never get done river there's no duet with me and my dad

Yeah. The fuck it in that one is very faint. It comes after the jazzy key change. A little off mic. How cool to get to do that with your dad is amazing. One of one experience. Yeah. I great, great musical arranger Vince Mendoza gave us that beautiful arrangement. And there was always a moment in the song for an instrumental. And I had great trumpet players that I'd kind of reached out to get feelers. I talked to Wynton Marsalis and Terrence Blanchard, my heroes, to say, hey, I'm doing this song. Would you, would you be interested? And they both said, send me in. And then I said to myself, you know, my favorite trumpet player is also my favorite person. And my dad is turning 80 this summer. He hasn't played the trumpet in any way professionally since the 60s. And I asked him, I said, I know you played Moon River as a kid. If I got you to rehearse, you had two weeks notice. Do you think you could get the lip? And do you think you could do it? And he says, well, let me see. And he unzipped his trumpet case that had Dizzy Gillespie for president on it. And it was dusty, hadn't been open since like the 70s. And, you know, every time I'd call the house, I'd say, Mom, how's he doing? I mean, you know, in the background, he's rehearsing. And I said, how's it going, Dad? He said, good, good. You know, I actually think I might be able to do this. So Greg Wells, our producer, set it up. I said, look, this is going to be my dad. I want this to be special and we need to have some patience. He hasn't played in a while. So Greg's credit, he said, we got to do this at Sunset Sound, which was Louis Armstrong's favorite studio in L.A. And then he called and they said, you know, we actually still have Louis Stuhl. So if you want, we could set out the stool for your dad to sit on and we got the old mics he used to record into. And I'm going, this is just turning into not just a song, but like a core memory moment. My whole family showed up and my brother and my sister-in-law, my two-year-old nephew who's walking around and, you know, I got pictures of my dad playing the trumpet for him. And it was just, you know, it, it, and he crushed it. He totally crushed it. So I got my musicality from him. He went into business. His mom said, that's no way to make a living. yeah and to have a song that is a tribute and a thank you for what he put in my dna uh is just

it's the best it's the best thing i've ever my uh my father-in-law is an incredibly talented musician um and you know great you know he can play uh jazz guitar and you know that kind of dixieland style and he's just i mean he can play like django reinhardt stuff oh great and um and he's really terrific and he would always sit in with other bands and stuff and he played at our wedding uh and but he's someone who that's what was his real love but he thought well you know i'm married i'm getting married and i'm gonna have kids and i must be responsible so he you know worked in insurance and there's so many people who are great artists i think we live in a culture now of this is my dream and i must do it there's so many people who make decisions that this is what want i want a stable income from my family and they do that so people like your

like your dad and he could really well we have one recording of a live performance he had in the 60s and he was i mean truly phenomenal and you know he became an executive recruiter you know he's a headhunter you know he goes out and finds jobs for people and he's brilliant at it and he's got luckily i don't have that side of the brain if i wasn't doing this i'd be lost but he has also the business he he can focus like really focus and he can do that and he's great at it but for him to watch me do it for a living my brother's a director to kind of watch our artistic endeavors Blossom has, I think, been really fun for him.

But also, and you're able to do that because he was responsible and did what he had to do.

That's exactly right, is that he went in to do what he did to make sure that we were able to say, hey, I liked going to the theater. Can I join the theater camp? Can I get an instrument to play myself? And that is the greatest service he could have ever possibly done for us.

I think our final message here is don't pursue your dreams. You know what I mean? Don't.

Speak English. Yeah. Do heroin.

I call it American.

Oh, sorry. Speak American, do heroin. Deny your dreams. Deny your dreams.

Yeah. I call old English original American. 1100 AD English to me is like, yeah, that was American. And then they made it English. Yep. I'm a moron that just doesn't quit. Well, latest album, cinematic. It's really, it's amazing. And also, I mean, I was thinking, do you ever just drive around and listen to yourself and enjoy it? Or is that impossible?

Well, there's so much of that that happens when you're doing mixes. And you've got to make sure you're listening with a critical lens because you just want to make sure that everything is balanced right. So, I mean, yes, you accidentally get chills sometimes. You say, well, I sounded good there. Well, that really sounds great. You prick. Yeah, it's true. It's true.

Ah, here comes the high note. Ah, yeah. I'm going to rent you a convertible and we're going to get a bumped up sound system and you're going to listen to cinematic driving around LA and people are going to see you listening to yourself and pointing at yourself at stoplights. I'm going to point at you.

Yeah. What a voice, eh?

Yeah. Josh, this has been a real delight. Same here. Thank you so much. You were a teenager, I believe when I met you and you were again, really sweet, really funny. and i thought and now here you are uh and you're an incredibly incredibly good guy and uh terrific

artist so well glad to know you and thanks again for your help listen thank you for the opportunity thank you for being an inspiration for so many years you make it look easy i know how hard it is and you're just such a beacon of light for so many so that's this is the one i'm gonna stick the landing here with some take it

take it well you heard it here I'm a huge influence musically you are you are hearing your Danny boy really oh Danny boy the pipes the pipes maybe I can do this for a living Tony O'Brien goes broke in one month Josh thank you Peyronie's disease, also known as PD, is a condition that isn't talked about often, but it's more common than many men realize. Some men may even feel embarrassed or reluctant to bring it up. PD may involve a buildup of scar tissue that forms under the skin of the penis, which can cause a noticeable curve with a bump during an erection. That curve can lead to pain during intimacy. It also may affect a man's confidence and mental health. It also can lead to frustration, depression, lowered self-esteem, and even withdrawal from sexual activity and physical intimacy. If you notice a curve with a bump down there, it might be PD. The good news is it's treatable. A urology specialist can diagnose Peyronie's disease and talk through treatment options. To learn more, visit talkaboutpd.com. I was at the airport. I was waiting in one of those long lines. And I kept saying, hey, let me through. I'm Conan O'Brien. And they said, shut up. You'll wait in line. And I went, oh, okay. That's so sad. It's a really good story. But I was hungry. I didn't have a snack with me. You got to keep, and I didn't want to lose my place in line and go try and find something.

I know.

That's when you got to have Nutri-Grain on you.

You got to always have a snack in your bag. And when it's a Nutri-Grain, it's perfect.

It's perfect because it's the right size. It's handy. It's also nutritious. Yes. Okay. You can go anywhere. It's made with 10 grams of whole grains, 10 vitamins and minerals. These guys are obsessed with 10s and no high fructose corn syrup. Nutri-Grain nourishes and it hits the spot with delicious flavors. They got strawberry, apple cinnamon, blueberry flavors. I just had a blueberry back in the snack area.

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In celebration of your upcoming appearance in the new Toy Story movie. Toy Story 5. Yeah. Yeah. The new one. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. We have something special to show you.

Oh my God, it's out. Oh, how cool. Look at that. this is my character his name is Smarty Pants

it's a toy

for the listener it's a toy for well basically my character in Toy Story 5 is a potty training device and so I think this must be my voice right hello there pick a number I mean that could be me yeah I think it's you no it's I mean I recorded these

you recorded specifically for the toy or did they take the sound bits from the movie

No, they had me do it for the toy. Do it here. And you know what I was like? I was like, you know what? I'm never- Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. This is in the bathroom. That's you. That is you. That's me. You did that here. So, what's that? You did it here in this studio. Yeah, I did it.

Yes!

It doesn't shut up.

It must be you.

It won't shut up.

Okay. Oh, no.

You know what I did? I decided, they're like- Jeez, someone did it. You know what I'm so weird? I'm being interrupted by myself. Finally! there's karma oh my god i can't get him to shut up it's motion activated are you done oh he's motion activated that's what the problem is yeah it is it is motion oh it does say it right around the box can you turn it upside down um i'm just gonna put it on the floor for a second and then can you yourself go on the floor too and can i and can i be boxed and put into storage by a collector um yeah uh they said oh do you want to you know i guess they can use a different voice but they said do you want to do your voice for the toy and i remember thinking i'm never going to be a toy again yeah i want to be a toy i want to be the voice of the toy a little extra they negotiate i do not think so no no well this is yeah this is the opposite of a cash grab yeah this is not that this is uh i mean i and i don't i don't care because it's to be part of the toy story saga it was just a delight and to be in the same company of these amazingly creative people and these huge stars. So I was just super happy to do it. But yeah, so now it's a toy.

I wonder when my youngest daughter gets potty trained if we'll use that. I think your wife will nix that. But what if you find out people are using it and children all over the world are getting constipated?

An epic, there's an epidemic of constipation among children. We think we found the, yeah, kids just seize up When they hear my voice.

I love that the time you're in a Pixar movie, it's when you're a roll of toilet paper.

Well, that's how the toy looks, but I'm not a roll of toilet paper.

I know, but that's what it's modeled after.

It's a roll of toilet paper.

Yeah, you look like a roll of toilet paper.

No, you're looking at it the wrong way. It's literally a roll of toilet paper.

It actually is like just a roll of toilet paper.

No, no.

Oh my God, your eyes light up. Okay.

You just talked over my toy, which is so you. My toy was trying to talk, and you in typical Sona fashion.

They should make a Sona toy.

Okay, I'm glad I didn't talk over that.

Let me see this thing. Oh, look, now, I like when you put it face down and he's just talking into the table. Alone.

again wow that's uh smarty pants when he's low on battery and he sounds drunk oh um that's my method as an actor oh that's good um now i have to be honest as we record this i've not seen the movie yet so i don't know what's gonna happen this could be the end of me really what are you

You're joking.

You just never know.

No, you're joking. It's going to be great.

I do not want to be the guy that fucks up Toy Story 5. Oh, you're stupid. Don't say that. Maybe you'll get a spinoff. What if I leave the podcast to go double down on my smarty pants? What if I start touring and I'm in a smarty pants costume? You go to conventions. I go to conventions and I have, you know, I'm one of those, I just do this a lot and take pictures with people.

Yeah.

I think that's a good idea.

That'll work.

Anyway, so that's it. I am the voice of a toilet training toy. This is exciting. Are you excited? Now, this is a big deal for you, animation and Disney and all that, right?

Well, I'm not like one way or the other on Disney cartoons, but Toy Story and Pixar, they're pretty amazing. And plus, now that I have a daughter that I go to the movies with, this is going to be amazing.

Will you take her to see Toy Story 5? Absolutely.

We go see a lot. We love going to movies. So, I mean, this would be, sometimes we're stretching to find a decent movie.

the only thing i've seen i go to the premiere tomorrow and i will see the movie for the first time i've and there are whole chunks of the movie i don't know because they only give you your part but um one of the things that they did let me see was the opening of the movie uh and it's just stunning do you have are you in that or do you have a i'm not in it i'm not give a grand entrance of it no i mean i don't know i have not seen anything to do with my part i'm totally in the dark so uh but they show the opening of the movie which is quite cinematic and amazing and i just uh they are because david hopping and i got to go to pixar yeah to record my parts and uh it is they're formidable these people they're just really amazing are you gonna take the boys i am

yeah and when he comes on screen are you gonna whisper to them i have complicated feelings about

I think, no, they know that Uncle Conan's in the next Toy Story movie.

They don't know which part I am.

They have no idea which part you're in.

Just tell them I'm Woody.

Oh, my God. That's blasphemy. Absolutely not. No way. Do you get to go to Disneyland for free? That's one of the perks of being like a Disney employee. Do you have a badge?

No.

Oh, okay. So you're not like, you were just like temporarily there. If you wanted to go to Disneyland for free or get tickets for somebody

who wants to go to Disneyland for free? I think they got what they needed from me. Okay. And I will be, and even if I try to purchase a legitimate ticket to Disneyland, they will probably tell me I can't have it.

You know, we floated the idea of the three of us going to Disneyland and recording there. I think we should do that. I do that, sure.

I would do that.

Yeah.

Yeah. I love Disneyland.

I took a date to Disneyland once, years ago. How old were you? I was when I was first living out here, So it would have been like 1986. I would have been 23. How was the date? It was a good date. That's a great date. It was a good date. You can do worse. Yeah. It takes a lot of the awkwardness out of it because there's so much to do. Why would there be awkwardness with me? What are you talking about?

Did you make her go to like the Hall of Presidents?

It gets worse. I took her to the Hall of Presidents and then made her, we stayed because I wanted to see each president talk multiple times. And then she got upset when I said, I told her, she started to say something. I said, quiet, it's Martin Van Buren coming up. He was the sage, I said, he was the sage of Kinderhook. And she went, what? And I said, old Kinderhook, upstate New York. Martin Van Buren, his lineage was, they were Dutch. And then I snapped at her and I never saw her again. She left in tears. And then Martin Van Buren looked at me and went, you are a dick, sir.

so much about martin van buren he said you know more about me than i do

she and then martin van buren said she looked hot and then lincoln said sure did you fucked up son and then all the cock blocked yourself young man you cock blocked yourself and that's hard to do and then um all the presidents just spent like 40 minutes telling me what an absolute

They had a roast? They just went after me. I would watch the Hall of Presidents roast.

Yeah, and then there was a Kevin Hart robot came out and he said, I'm not a president, but I want in on this. And then he went after me. And so it was all the presidents and Kevin Hart roasting me for making my girlfriend go see the Hall of Presidents. Anyway, she fled, never to return again. That's great. Anyway.

Toy Story 5. Do it, man. I don't know. My brain doesn't work today. Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. With Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It, too, could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at SiriusXM.com slash Conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

Big news, Sona. Yeah? Did you know T-Mobile recently partnered with the National Park Foundation? No way. Yep, they're making it easier to stay connected so you're free to wander. Well, that's really cool. And I love a national park, I really do. I do too. Now, there's one thing you have to have if you're doing that, good signal. It's a priority. Do you know what I mean? You got your maps, your music, this podcast. Yeah. So take America's best network plus their off-grid satellite coverage with you. Look, we're all a little spoiled, but we like to have access to all our stuff and suddenly you don't have it because of a bad signal. That's when I throw my phone into the Grand Canyon. Oh, okay. Literally filled half the Grand Canyon with phones. Then I got T-Mobile and never had to chuck them again. You know? Good. So wander over to T-Mobile.com and switch. Best based on analysis by Ookla of speed test intelligence data for 2H 2025. Wow. That's some sentence. T-satellite with capable device in most outdoor areas in US where you see the sky. That's important. You got to see the sky. Yep. Service may be limited or unavailable. included with experience beyond or $10 per month. Auto renews. Cancel any time. That was probably meant to be said by a robot really quickly, but I just did it slowly so you could really understand.

Disclaimer. Please do not throw your phone into the Grand Canyon.

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