Muse

What's up, everybody? Welcome to Flavor. Quick reminder, the Knicks are the champions of the world. France just got knocked the fuck out of the cup, Mark. I know, I know. Just got knocked out. Literally minutes ago, just got knocked out. Okay? That was a good game. Alex is fresh off of doing Team Uwaska, is what Neil Brennan called it. He got a Groupon for Ayahuasca and went to some lady's Airbnb in New Jersey and did it, and he has lived to see another day. So we will get back to that in a second but first of all France because part of the ayahuasca journey is about maybe connecting to lost and past lives and all this kind of thing you have just experienced a great loss as France has just been rightfully knocked the fuck up out of the World Cup

you don't have to say it like that they lost it was a tough game they lost to a good team I didn't see much of it yeah it's for the best not their best showing you could say that

you guys watched the whole game and what do you think What do you think the difference was?

They didn't show up.

They didn't show up. They just had a bad game. But Argentina doesn't show up, and they have help from...

Yeah, because they have Infantino. They have maybe Israel. Who's the best player on Argentina? A lot of people behind Argentina.

Is it BBN, Yahoo, or Infantino?

It's difficult to say. Twitter, if you go by Twitter, it's all of the above. They have them. They have Hitler, I think. Hitler was helpful? Yeah, he was in Argentina for a while. So he's still over there? Yeah, he was helping them out.

Do you think Goebbels invented the HGH that they put Messi on? It was a fucking Mengele science experiment. Yes, Mengele, not Goebbels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Type shit. Yeah, type shit. Type shit.

Yeah, that's what it was. But no, the boys didn't show up. It wasn't great. It wasn't great. At least I wasn't there. Lamine Jamal was just cutting up Dini on the outside. It just was not. Lamine Jamal, dude. Yeah.

Cabba Beast. Legend. I mean, he was making girls catch fucking charges. Whoa, what? Whoa, whoa, whoa. He was like 16 or 17. Wasn't he cracking shorties that were like 27 years old? He was under 18 smashing like celebrity chicks in Spain. As he should. He was making them catch chargers.

Oh, I thought he was putting that on. Stay with me, my boy. Put that on my man. Stay with me.

I said he was making them. Like his ability to play the game of soccer, football. Football. Yes. Made women not care about statutory laws.

Yeah.

It seems that way.

Yeah. When I was out there, they said that he had the herb. He had the, Jesus. The herb, because he was fucking so much.

Why would you put that on him, bro?

His people said that. Can I just say one thing? His people said that. This is what Spaniards always do. And they don't even look at it.

Can we just say one thing? Please. That's a legendary hater. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That right there is a legendary. Even in victory. Even in victory. Hypothetical herpes on an 18-year-old. Son, his people did that. He's not stealing pussy from you.

Yo, but they were saying it like they were proud of him. Yo, son, just tell me how your girl watches the game, bro. Just tell me how your girl watches the game. She doesn't even ruin him a little bit too much.

A little bit too much. A little bit too much. He's bumpy.

We need to see her jersey. Her jersey might have the name on it. That's like, God damn it.

Oh, can she wear a Yamal jersey? Yeah, yeah. She's a pedophile. Yo, but Al, do you want to take that back, that allegatione?

I don't think he does. I'm just saying what I heard when I was in Barcelona.

And why would somebody within the home country say such a horrific rumor about a young man like that?

Maybe he's taking it down like that. Maybe he's taking it down to French. That's why he probably got it from them. You think so?

I don't think French people get STDs. Yeah, I don't know about that. I think it started there. I don't know who's fucking the most. Can I ask you an honest question?

Do Europeans get AIDS? That's a good point because people accuse Europeans of being gay all the time. And then I don't know if the epidemic hit them like that. If I'm being honest, I don't think they was getting after it.

I don't think they was getting after it. I think they were just gay, but acted like straights. So they would have maybe casual sex, but not too crazy.

Whereas in America, everyone was acting straight. They were free. They were gay. They were free. No, no, no.

They were, how do I say it? They were, some of them earned it. nobody earned it do you know what I mean

let me see the statistics here

my boy, alright so Emma's best friend is gay he told me they got a new they got a thing called Doxy where you take that after you have sex and it cleans everything out of your system no matter what STD you get except AIDS and then they got a thing called PrEP that you take all the time and that stops you from getting AIDS so front door, back door, STDs they've figured out.

That's kind of smart. Wait, wait. The prep they take even if they don't have AIDS? I thought they'd take that once they got the AIDS. No, no.

You take it to stop you from ever getting it. It's a goalie. Get the fuck out. Yeah, bro,

they figured it out. Is it like a statin?

Yes. One thing that does make me happy about Laminia Mall winning is seeing his little brother. His brother, right? His little brother. How would they do that? I actually was thinking that. I don't know the answer. Is that a crazy thing to say?

Like, is it same parents or different? I would imagine different parents. I mean, different dad. Yeah. I don't know the exact science. I'm going to look into this real quick. I think a different dad. I think that's his dad holding him. I don't think that means that. I mean, he's so cute. He's cute as hell. But they are so cute together. Oh, they're like homies? Yeah, homies. Yeah, yeah, he's at everything. It's so fun.

Damn.

That's all he wants.

It's really crazy that you would put out that alligazione on him like that with no evidence to back it up. Son, Europe, that's not a bad thing.

Herpes? Right? Hold on. Hold on. They're like, hold on, hold on. What do you mean like that? They're a refined culture. It's like, come on.

So they're not really worried about herpes or those types of STDs.

Yeah. It's like siesta herpes. Yeah.

I mean, I think if your dick looks like the semolina bread, then it's a problem. That's my personal opinion. If you go to an Italian restaurant and they just immediately bring you some olive oil and Lamine Jamal's dick. I don't know what I was a little bit. It's a show. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

It is his half brother for the record. It's his half brother. They have the same mom. Spotted baguette. They have the same mother. Joe.

How, why'd you make it spotted, bro? Why'd you make it spotted? It would be spotted, right? Nah, nah, nah. We gotta take that off of him. I mean, wipe that clear of him. Wipe that clear of him.

Ali Gatia, he's 19 and he's a devout Muslim.

Word? Yeah. 100%. I don't know. No, he is. He's one of like the new age Muslims. Nah, I don't think he...

He doesn't drink water during Ramadan. He's a real one. I'm pretty sure.

Unless you know something, I don't know. i know he's not married i know he's dicking down bitches over there how do you know that though oh i know like it's it's everybody knows is that true yeah yeah i don't know yeah mark doesn't

seem like he wants to confirm it i i have no information other than i've seen him

on the internet besides that let me and you all get some pussy that's the one that's a little

bit too far well i did see a video maybe of him with a girl and i was like wait a second maybe there's something going on. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe this is AI. We've been AI'd before on this podcast. I don't think we were AI'd, man. You see? This is him with his sweet, devout Muslim girlfriend. Muslim, yep. And they're just hanging out and having a great time enjoying themselves.

Uh-huh. Yeah. That's the boy.

That was just the hello. That was a little hello on the cheek. They do that out there. Yeah, this seems like a good regular relationship, you know?

Is there a version where his impact on this team makes Spain change their stance on immigration?

Maybe.

Wait, what do you mean?

They're the most inviting.

Well, but I think people in Spain are frustrated by it. The same thing you're hearing all over Europe They might need to change the city names a little bit. Like Granada, you can't do it? Wait, what is that? Granada. But what's it named after? I don't know, I imagine some Muslims. Yeah, I'm like, what are you doing? All the cities in southern Spain are super Muslim.

The one that I'm talking about that's crazy is Matamoros.

Kill the Moors.

Kill the Muslims. Wow. It's just the name of a town.

Is that really a place?

I'm almost positive. I gotta double check.

We gotta check the immigration population there to see if they...

But you know there, like, they made some new law where all the illegals there, there's a path for citizenship.

Yeah, I think it was much the chagrin of the Spanish.

I mean, the government's doing it.

I know, I know. Well, I think it's one of those things where it's like there is a left wing progressive government, but there are also people there who maybe are frustrated by the same thing that's existing around the world. It's like economic insecurity, people going, wait, why are we giving all this money to these people who are coming here when the people here are suffering?

Yeah, so the people might be against it. But the fact that they're even doing that, no other country right now is doing that. We're trying to kick everybody out.

How many how many you got to let in to get a laminya mall? You know what I mean? Like, I don't think we do the numbers on that enough. you know like how many we got to let in is it is it like 10 000 100 000 yeah yeah and also the spanish had great players from spain so they don't really need to let anybody in yeah but it helps you

know it helps all the best from all over the world you're gonna have a team like that i just

bust their ass yeah but they also got a team from all the other places those players are born of

france those are french that's why they suck those are diehard frenchmen dude that's why they All of them were born in France.

Everybody on the French team was born in France?

I think there's two or three guys that weren't.

Was it you who told me the Morocco team, a lot of them were born in France?

Yeah, almost all of them. I think Morocco fielded the first team where none of them were born in the country. That's crazy. That's really. Like there are 11 players were all born.

outside of Morocco.

I don't think you've got to be born, but I think you've heard my take on this. You've got to be fed. You have to be fed. Whoever feeds you, that's where you're from. For how long? I would say after titty milk. I would say once you get off the titty, whatever country you're in, that's where you're from. That's what you can represent in a physical activity.

But I think you can go down, though. If you don't make the main team, I think you can fall back. Nope. Come on.

I think I think how far back can I go can I go back to Africa if you like if I trace my roots if I can trace if I get 23 and mean myself back to wherever in Africa might be more than 23 but like to wherever we evolved from in Africa right yeah yeah can I go play for that team like how far back can we go grandparents yeah grandparents so there's a limit yeah there's

a limit grandparents but then you can fall back if you don't make the main one like let's say you were born and raised in france and then you can't make the french team you're like all right

fine i'll go play for algeria but isn't that an example that like you failed your parents like your grandparents or your parents or grandparents moved to another country to give

you a better life yeah and you're like i'm going back for a little but that's the thing they're not

even going back they're playing the tournament in america no you gotta live there you gotta experience no ac you gotta experience no fucking ice in the soda like you have to live a little bit like you're from that country. Yeah, for like a month, maybe. Yeah, and I think the American players should have to do that, too. The players in Morocco, they don't live there? Nah. Really? They're elite players that are probably playing for most teams in Europe, right? Yeah. So, like, they're going to play at the team that they play for. Yeah, but I thought to play for

the country, you either have to live there for five years or your parents or grandparents have to be from there. I thought that was a rule. They have to have some type of citizenship that they can get. Yeah, but you can't just get citizenship without living there. You can get citizenship.

If you're nice, son, you saw Saudi Arabia made it okay to live with a woman you're not married to for Cristiano Ronaldo. They changed the rules of Islam. You have to be engaged. You have to be engaged.

And you're like, fine, I'll give her a ring, whatever.

He still calls her his girlfriend. That shit's adorable. Like in interviews, he's like, yeah, my girlfriend. It's like, y'all got seven kids. What the fuck are we talking about, my girlfriend? He refuses to lock it down. Isn't there like, just get a prenup or something and then lock it down. Why not?

I don't even know if he's worried about that.

you think? I don't think he gotta worry about anything because he's Cristiano Ronaldo. He exists on another... Or do you know how women are incredibly good at just getting used to whatever their life is? Do you think going through her head is, my husband's Cristiano Ronaldo, let me not fucking ruin this shit. This is awesome. Or do you think she's at the point where she's like, you gotta go play for a billion dollars in fucking Saudi Arabia? You want me to move to Saudi Arabia? I think it's the latter. Important update for shows. Remember, the shows in Brea, California Were moved Again, I apologize about this The movie schedule moved So I had to shift things with that As far as being on the West Coast So instead of being last weekend They're going to be this weekend The 23rd to the 25th Anybody who had tickets to those shows before Those are going to be good for this show If you can't go for whatever reason They'll absolutely give you a refund And we've added two more shows On Thursday, the 23rd So if there are tickets still available for those, you can go get those right now. Thank you guys so much. I appreciate it, and I'm very sorry for any inconvenience, people traveling in for the shows, et cetera. I sincerely apologize. Reach out, DM me if there's any kind of issue, and I'll do my best to make sure I make it up for you wherever you live when we come do a show there. Also, Halifax, Nova Scotia, we are coming out there August 8th, Great Outdoors Fest, Garrison Grounds. Some of you guys, the OGs call it Citadel Hill. We're going to be out there, amazing show. Mark Gagnon coming, Cam Patterson from SNL, Kill Tony coming, Lucas Zelnick coming, Rory Gardner coming. It's going to be a hell of a show. So grab tickets at theandrewscholes.com for both of those shows. We're going to be adding some more shows in different cities in the very near future. So stay tuned.

What's up, people? Great news. I'm going to be coming to a bunch of cities at the end of the year to do stand-up comedy. I would love for you guys to join me. I'm going to Plano, Texas, Chandler, Arizona, Pasadena, California, San Diego, Detroit, and Salt Lake City. I would love for you all to come on out. I'll see you guys at the shows.

And guys, let's get off the internet. Let's have some fun in real life. I have my tennis clinic, Tennis for the People. And this will be July 25th. If there's six tickets left, they're all advanced spots. But fuck it, even if you're not advanced, just get the ticket, show up. We'll find room for you to play on the other courts. But literally, six tickets left before this sells out. Theallloveclub.com, July 25th. See you guys there. Peace. take your flexibility beyond the mat with paypal pay nothing at checkout Then enjoy a flexible monthly payment plan that works for you with no sign up or late fees. Find your Zen and an easy way to pay with PayPal. Download the PayPal app to get started. Subject to approval. Pay monthly consumer loans made by WebBank. Available through PayPal link. NMLS 910457. Learn more at PayPal.com slash pay monthly.

But yeah, we should make a correction here. Matamoros, not a city in Spain, city in Mexico, but named after a Spanish like legendary guy. And also we need to correct the AI thing that we said last week that wasn't true. I don't think that. I think this is real.

I can't believe y'all didn't know that was AI. I knew it.

We got AI. Y'all dumb. In the honor of being a proud journalist and being committed to the truth, we played this Erling Holland video. Yeah. And it was AI. I didn't even know that. One of the things people pointed out was that the patches are all a little bit weird. And then people pointed out that this is the original one. This guy right here. Apparently. I think. I don't even really know. Which is a way funnier video.

Is this AI or real?

That's clearly AI. I think this one might be the real one.

Yo, can I just... This, I think, is the real one that they made. Can I just ask a question? Can I just ask a question? This is a genuine question. This is not me being insulting or nothing. Is he... Is he a cousin? It makes me laugh like that.

Oh. I think this is Mongolian. Yeah, I mean, same to same, I think.

They used to use that term But does he have Is he syndromatic of anything? I think so

He might have something cooking up He got a mark for it

But he's nice with his chopsticks though I don't think he is But I think that he looks it

No, nah They can use forks Do you try to tell me you think this guy Come on, son

I don't know Come on, son Come on out You might just be a hard working man Do what you mean. You got to stop that shit. Do what you mean. You got to stop that.

Yeah. But early Holland might have won the World Cup on his own. Tell me. Did you see the celebration they had in Norway? No, they went crazy. They've been going absolutely wild. He's won hearts and minds. He came off the plane with this joint right here, representing proud American culture. What was it, a bald eagle? No, it was a raccoon drinking a beer. He got some tequila.

Is this AI? Did we get AI'd again? No, no, this one is real. You really did. I thought he bought a raccoon, man. I thought he was like, you got to see these little animals. They're incredible. They'll sift through your garbage.

I think this one is, he posted on Snapchat, like he got a bunch of taxidermy things from like some guy's, like bar or something. And it was like, dude, America's fire. And brought it home. But they've been having like massive celebrations.

What's the real pick?

Which is the real one? What? No, this is real. To my understanding, he's the one that posted this. And he was like, follow me home. And he posted it on Snapchat. But yeah, they've been.

So you think Erling Haaland won the World Cup? In terms of like every World Cup, there's a player that becomes a superstar that everybody falls in love with. Mbappe was what, two worlds or last one? Last one. 2018.

That was when he scored the hat-trick in the final game? No, that was the last one, 2022 against Argentina. But they lost that game, but he got a hat-trick. And then 2018, he's the young rookie that wins. And he goes on that crazy run. Wins the World Cup at like 19 or whatever. Got it.

And then, okay, so this year we think it's Erling Haaland. Yeah, and then even beyond that, just like, he's so beloved. The personality is really fun.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

It's almost unfair.

And the skill set is there. He can stack it up.

What'd you say?

And the skill set is there. And the skill set is there.

It is almost unfair when, like, like, for example, like, Messi might not have the personality side of it, though there are videos. You know, get bringing up, bro.

This one killed him. He got a little bit of that mongoloidism.

Have you seen the compilations of Messi being awkward? No, no.

oh it's funny you use that a word uh use the one with the one where he's getting interviewed by the guy the guy this is everybody's like yo this is messy has autism but if you to me this is the most

normal i've ever seen him is in this video yeah and he has a bunch of these kinds of moments where he just does stuff and it's like oh just a little a little off ski a little off ski i think he's

been working on it too though like now it's like he's having normal reactions and he's like crying and trying to cheer with his teammates and stuff like that before he used to just like walk around just like yeah we just scored yeah you know yeah yeah a little bit of that oh yeah this one right

here okay go so this interviewer's talking to him and he's saying that it's his dream to have interviewed leo messi and he begins to cry

but he stays in it he stays in it that's actually too edited the real one

That's the real one. And that motherfucker sits in it. At first, Messi laughs and then leans back. And the guy still is crying and saying how emotional is. And then Messi's like, oh, it's not a bit. And then he has to lie back into the interview. Oh, man.

These guys. Maybe that's what makes him great, though. I forget if this is me making it up or someone said this. But they were like, yeah, I feel awkward in life. And then when I'm on the field, I feel calm and connected to people. And it's like the way that he connects with human beings. beings because he might be a little teesmo it's like me with tennis yeah you're like messy yeah

you're just like messy now i will say this i'm getting a lot of uh oh boy here we go and then of course people just come on posing for pictures is hard

oh wow i'm just watching the guy drumming just shaking his head like all right nice all right cool all right schultz in the hamptons that one but yeah i mean someone is compiling all your most awkward moments no one looks great but Messi in particular it's just a little rough

I'm getting a lot of videos on the air now that I've watched a few soccer videos so they're sending me a lot of soccer stuff are you getting the Messi-Ronaldinho compilations at all? of them playing together their friendship and how much they love one another it's just a joy I lived in Barcelona during Ronaldo's, like, heyday. Okay. Ronaldinho's heyday. Okay. And he was just such a beloved, like, creative character on the pitch. And, like, I don't know. It was really cool seeing. Like, I don't know. Again, they can make you think anything because you're just grabbing little moments from, like, years of playing.

Yeah, I've been seeing, like, Ronaldo versus Messi. Like, who's a better person? Yeah, see, he loves to. It'll be, like, Ronaldo, like, petting a kid's head, and they're like, he's the best. And it'll be Messi, like, ignoring a handshake, and they're like, he sucks. Yeah. And it's like just whatever side you're on, and they just find clips. It's so funny.

But I will say recency bias is definitely a play here, but with the amount of Messi videos and the success of, what are they called, VA Argentina, it looks as if, and I'm a complete expert in soccer, so take this with a grain of salt, but it looks as if the conversation on Messi or Ronaldo is definitely shifting in the direction of Messi. Even from the other greats talking about it, like even other soccer players, you're seeing all these clips and going, yeah, it's Messi, it's Messi.

I think this was Ronaldo's chance to even it up.

So you're saying Messi was ahead. Yeah. And then if Ronaldo had an absolutely exceptional World Cup, they win it all.

But Messi, it's like, I don't even know what the NBA equivalent would be for Messi. It's like, you can... It's Jalen Brunson. If Jalen Brunson was 20 years the greatest player. Right. If Jalen LeBron goes on a run for the next 20, it's like the longevity of LeBron. You can score like Jordan. You have handles like Kyrie. Yeah. And you do it for 20. Yeah, that's the only thing that compares.

Yeah.

I don't even know what would be close in basketball.

But it's interesting. What's that? Good job. Thank you.

I read that on Instagram comment.

But it's similar to Jalen, I think. And I'm not just saying this. They actually do play kind of similarly. They're undersized. Yeah. They, for whatever reason, get wherever they want to go. In tight spaces. in very tight spaces and they're not that fast like I don't know if any of us would look at Messi and be like he's got Mbappe's speed but he's quick he's quick he gets to his spots wherever he wants to get to and I think people used to compare him to Steph but Steph's game is so different because there's all these long shots whereas Messi's getting to the cup if he wants to get to the cup but there's nothing you can fucking do about it so I think they both have similarly confusing games because when you just see them you go there's no reason you should be so effective. And then you watch them play and you're like, you're the most effective person. Yeah.

Yeah. This is an all-time great, messy, awkward moment. Okay, go. He's walking into like the training camp or whatever. Those little kids are so excited. He goes, oh, and, oh.

I love it.

I love it. Also, I saw this on Twitter. I actually thought this would be helpful for the American folks. This is World Cup semis in NBA terms. And I was like, oh, okay. So England, loud fan base might finally be their year. Those are the Knicks. Spain, elite defense led by a young superstar. That's the Spurs. Argentina, can the GOAT carry them one more time at the Golden State? And then France, dominant roster, top to bottom, probably the best team on paper, OKC.

Very interesting. Yeah. Very interesting.

Any counter-examples here? Any counter-points?

No, I think the England-Knicks thing. I just hate the Spurs-Spain thing, being a Spurs fan. But it's accurate. It's low-key accurate. The only thing I would say is that the Spanish game, like the Spurs are known for boring fundamentals. And Spain is known for... The tiki-tiki... Yeah, to me, I think it's almost like a more progressive style with soccer right and like i wouldn't say flash but like there's an exuberance to the game spain it's not like a boring slow plotting style which is what it's kind of boring in my opinion watching

spain why is it just like possession because it's like so systematized like they play as such a unit that like they're pretty patient they build up they score goals that are like pretty technical but not like a wow factor you know so it's kind of just like all right and they scored that's how feels watching Spain for me. I mean, it's effective. They win, but it's just like... Whereas the old Spain, I think, was more exciting. That's the tiki-taka. Yeah, and they're still kind of doing that, but it's just a lot more systematic and maybe less creative, but more effective.

Argentina being the Warriors, do you have any objections to that? I don't know enough about Argentina. They both have old teams.

Yeah, legacy with the GOAT, kind of. And they have won chips in the past, and are they going to be able to do it again? I think it's actually pretty solid. Also, I did hear another NBA comparison with soccer. I thought it was interesting. Hit me. Someone compared Zlatan. And I don't know enough about basketball to know if this is accurate. He's LeBron. I heard.

Oh, wait a minute. Give me another guess. The LeBron story. Give me another guess. Give me another guess. Okay, go ahead. Is he a current player? No. How long has he been out? To be honest with you, I don't know. Did he play during your lifetime?

No. I don't think so. No. Magic Johnson. People have compared him to Magic, but that was not the highest voted one on Reddit. It was this guy, Dominique Wilkins. No, that's hate. They hate him, bro. That's what they said. I don't know enough about basketball, but the comments were like, oh, that's actually pretty solid.

That's Europeans that don't know anything about basketball. See, I don't know enough about Zalton or whatever. Oh, there's a lot of time. Zalton.

No, that's hate. He never won like the big trophies, had like crazy highlights, like highlights where you're like, oh, this is the most insane thing I've ever seen.

He never won a championship? He never won like La Liga?

There's a lot of trophies in Europe, so like he won like some of the local trophies, but never like the big ones.

Okay. And so this is what the, this is what- So that's the knock on him. He never won the big ones.

But is he a flashy player? Who, Zawson? Yeah. Yeah, like the most flashy. Like has some of the craziest goals you've ever seen in your life. Like if you look at his highlight reel, you're like, this must be the greatest player of all time.

different types of flesh it's not like um this is how the comment characterized it and what people

liked amazing highlight reel came close to the mvp a few times but never won it won national titles but never got close to the two big ones which is world cup and champions league career numbers are

very good but maybe not an all-timer oh they're saying he's not an all-timer but like for me

it's lots of like his his aura his his mystique is greater because he played for sweden and like Sweden was never really like a big challenge.

So he didn't have a chance to actually compete at the World Cup.

But if you look at his highlights, you're like, oh, this is the greatest guy ever.

Does Kyrie have a chip? Yeah, with LeBron. Oh, okay. Outside of that, no.

There's another little fun little NBA crossover. Yeah. You know, kind of interesting.

So what about his time in Barcelona? I saw somewhere where he was like, yeah, I was miserable there. Oh, maybe. I don't know. But like, do you know anything about his time in Barcelona? No, I can't speak to it. Because somebody was talking to him about happiness or something like that. he was being interviewed and he was like are you happy he goes happiness is moments it's like sometimes you're happy sometimes you're not happiness is moments my dream my whole life was to play for barcelona i went there and it was my nightmare so happiness is moments he's a sophisticated fucking thinker he's like a monk yeah like uh yeah like i would really love to talk to him right yeah zlatan you gotta come on the pod man like i i would i'm very interested in his competitive mindset, but also just life mindset. It seems like he's really grinded his gears on everything that he's done. It doesn't seem like his decisions are frivolous. And I'm curious about that.

He seems like a fucking karate master. Or he just knows the right things to say. He kind of speaks in riddles

sometimes. I think he treats it like martial arts. his approach to it seems more martial arts based also happiness is moments like what athlete you know would have a bar like that you know what I mean

alright so who do you have in the final tomorrow Argentina vs England Falklands Revisited

I think it's coming home, man.

I think it's coming home.

I hate to say it, my Scottish family's going to be furious with me.

Now I'm with you. I'm fully with you. I think it's coming home, man. I want England. You want England? I want England badly. I want England. I want England to beat Argentina. I want England to beat Spain. I think it's coming home, man. And that's the true Knicks fan comparison right here, right? It might finally be their year. I think it's coming home, man. So, according to Cal Street, for the game tomorrow, a.k.a. today, England advances 53% over Argentina. England's actually the favorite. What? It's kind of crazy. Why is that? I don't know. I mean, England's been playing well. They got, like, maybe more star power. I don't know. Yeah, but Argentina got BB. Yeah, but Argentina's been squeaking by all their games. They beat, like, a one-man down Switzerland, squeaked by Cape Verde, squeaked by Egypt. So it's like they haven't been playing, like, out of their minds. They've just been, like, barely getting by all these games. Interesting. Okay. Whereas England's been looking pretty good. And then going into the final, they put Spain at a favorite, 58%.

I think England's going to do it, man. I think it's going to be a historic year for underdogs. I think next win, I think England wins.

I think the English fans would appreciate it more.

There'll be no fucking rowing in New York. There'll be no fucking rowing in New York. There'll be no fucking rowing. There'll be no fucking rowing. There'll be no fucking rowing in New York. Oh, that's awesome. So we might have to go to the final if they're in it, but we got to get that little cheat sheet with the chance before. Is there like a WhatsApp we can get on?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've always wondered that. Like, how do they know where to sit? Oh, how do they know, like, hey, guys, we're all going to be on this goal? No, when you're buying tickets. Don't they do like it? It says it? Yeah. Damn, I'm a dumbass.

You're going to the game tomorrow. How did you not know that you already went to the France Morocco joint? I was wondering. I was like, why are they all over there? How was that? Before we get into Team Iwaska, can you tell me about...

It was awesome. Going to the games is just the coolest thing ever.

Al feels no different, by the way.

Yeah, right?

That's $200 worth of difference. I actually do.

Just walking into the stadium and seeing the field, it's just like, holy, you feel like you're in Harry Potter. Shit feels like Quidditch.

You're like, oh, different than watching a NFL football game? I've never been to an NFL game.

Got it. So I can't say. But I imagine similar. It's just like this massive, perfect, green, lush field. All the fans are just like awesome. And there was actually a ton of Morocco fans. Didn't expect how many there would be in Boston. They all came down from Montreal. That makes sense. Yeah.

And do they, is it charged up outside coming in? Like, when do you start feeling the energy?

I mean, getting in was an insane fiasco. Why? I mean, just like the traffic, the stadium, the way it was coming. Like, I don't think they used the normal protocols that they used for Pats games because it was just crazy. Like, trying to get in there was a nightmare.

Can't be worse than day three of the Jay-Z concert. But, uh. Oh, did you also go to that? Maybe. So Team Iwaska right to Jay-Z day three. So it really tested your patience. So we're going to talk about that.

But then we got the greatest hookup ever. Dove got on the line with Lieutenant Mock. And Lieutenant Mock was like just a legendary dude from Boston, born and raised. Who's this? And he's just a police captain that helped us park illegally on the median. Okay. And then every word that he used was just a different Bostonism. So he's like, yes, Lieutenant Mock. Am I talking to Mock? And I was like, yes, Mock. And he was like, all right, Mock, you're going to park your car? It seemed like he was doing it on purpose. He was like, you got to go, Pakika, up on the median, right in front of the Chick-fil-A, Pakika. And I was like, we're all laughing in traffic, trying to hold it in while he's on speakerphone, being like, are you alone? And I was like, no, I'm with everyone. He's like, okay, all right. And you could like, I'm sure he could hear us laughing. And then we like pulled up and dapped us up. He missed in the game.

Dove goes, he goes, how far are you? How far are you away? And Mark goes, I don't know, 100 meters? And he goes, meters? What the fuck? Yeah, I love it.

Literally. He goes, what, are you European? Am I talking to a European guy? It was so funny. But yeah, it was amazing. Going to the game, it was nice going with Dove. Yeah. You know, it was nice going with Dove. It is sad because it wasn't like the greatest showing. Yeah. So it was kind of like a one-sided game. But we had a wonderful time. Yeah, it was truly amazing. All the games have been awesome. Tomorrow I'm a little worried about because it's going to be tense. Because of the historical implications? Yeah. More tense than the French-Morocco game? Yeah, I don't know if there's animosity like that. Really? I don't know if it's the same way. Because France and Morocco, I think also any type of colonized country, and I'm going to speak out of turn here a little bit, but I think there's a little bit of symbiosis because there's a lot of cultural tradeover. Right. So it's like... You're upset about the treatment. You love the coffee. But yeah, exactly. So the French get some coffee. There's a Moroccan guy that lives down the street from you. Morocco, they speak a lot of French. There's something that's connected. Whereas Argentina and England, there was just a bloody war where a thousand people died and they hate each other.

Yeah, over some islands that neither of them really give a fuck about.

Exactly. And so it's like, that's just a blood feud. There's a quote that I heard from... How did England lose that one? Well, I think they got it back, right? I don't even know really who controls the Falcons right now.

Oh, I thought they lost that.

Miles, do you know who controls the Falklands? Oh, the Falklands are a self-governed British overseas territory. So yeah, I think under a 2009 constitution, the islands have full internal self-government. The UK is responsible for foreign affairs. So yeah, the UK went and got it back, and the Argentines are not happy about it. And what's on these islands? Is it just having access in the region? I'm assuming. So they just put a base over there or some shit? Something like that. got it but like margaret thatcher was like yo we need that that was recent too that she was in the

80s margaret thatcher man she she did not give a fuck yeah she was like it's so funny the interview

for being like these islands are ours and it's like you they're 10 000 miles away you're not even close yeah she's like it's obviously english it is but why and she's like look at it i mean

Like, didn't she, like, create apartheid in South Africa?

Probably. Look, I support Liverpool, so I hate Margaret Thatcher. And whatever they want to say against Margaret Thatcher. What is their chant? Maggie, Maggie, Maggie. Die, die, die. Yeah, dude. She's in a box. There's something about that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they hate Margaret Thatcher. So I'm like, all right. They're up to something. I think they're on. I think they're on.

And also, they hate one of the newspapers. Is it The Sun? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

right yeah i remember this i don't remember which one but i think it was because they reported on

the hillsborough massacre or something yes yeah there was like a death at the stadiums of people

got trampled or something like that yeah yeah yeah but yeah maradona had a quote back in the day which was playing against england and the quote is like basically saying like we have to kill these people i'm assuming it's it's real it's possible that it might not be but i saw it on on twitter and it was like these people killed our brothers they killed our cousins and we're gonna kill them i was like damn all right so we're gonna see tomorrow is gonna be uh it's gonna be

a lot do you do you really think england gives a flying fuck about argentina anymore i mean i don't think so i don't even think you're thinking about it they don't got money in the atm machines i think maybe there was a point in time where there was some historical significance

but anytime there's a world cup game and you got some hooligans some proper geezers down there they're gonna bring it up yeah dude the veneers are gonna be in full display and they're gonna You know, going at it, dude. Once you got the veneers out, it's... Ibiza. Yeah. Ibiza. They took a break from Ibiza this weekend to go down and fight some guys in Atlanta. It's going to be awesome. But, yeah, the World Cup's just the best. Now, who are you going with? I'm going with my buddy Jaime and another one of our friends that lives down there. Oh, man. So it's going to be a nice little vibe.

All right, Alex, tell us about Team Iwaska. So just to put this in perspective for anybody who did not watch last week's episode, But Alex planned on doing ayahuasca, and he was paying $200 for the session. We immediately called Neil Brennan, who has done tens of sessions. And he was like, that seems eerily low, concerningly low. It should be five times the price of that. I would be very concerned. That's what he said to you going into this, and you still decided to go. Yeah. Okay.

Because, you know, he's just one of these gringos that gets tricked.

What the fuck? Sorry, this is a different video.

want to bring up later it's a very funny video but i'll bring up later but he's one of these uh you know hollywood guys that just gets tricked into anything and overpriced but you know what it felt like going to the authentic mexican spot that mexican people are eating there because 90 of the people there only spoke spanish and yes all from south america like ice would have had a field day put it like that really yeah so i felt like once i was there i was like oh i'm doing the real shit yeah so take us through the experience what happened okay oh my god where i start so much so you guys put that in my head and i was worried about this guy what oh my gosh where do i even start yo it's so much i had i had the crazy line i took the line okay I'm thinking about the whole weekend.

Did you drive there or Airbnb?

I drove. What did you wear? Just some sweats and a tee. You didn't Alex media it? No, I wanted to be comfortable. I wanted to be comfortable. Full burlap suit. Actually, I did kind of because I did all black and then my next day outfit was all white. It's like, I'm born again type of shit. So I did. There was some intention with the fix.

Before it even happened, you're like, I'm going to be so born again.

I'm not even going to talk about the connotations Alex has with the colors white and black. But, like, you basically voiced it all to yourself. Stop it. So you said you did Iowa so you get the black out of here?

That's not what you're saying, bro. He did even support the black team, France. He supported the colonizers, the white Spanish. There was two black players on a Spanish team. He's like, Nico! Yes, Nico! Let's go. Okay, okay.

go you're in your black outfit you go yeah okay let's all right so i go from thursday filming uh charlemagne academics then following day jay-z day one and then straight from the concert i go home pick up my stuff drive to jersey it was like at some mansion it was one of the guys who was partaking he's a doctor so he offered to offers his place yes it was huge house fact

that there's a doctor there that's comforting yes what kind of doctor uh i didn't ask chiropractor

but i was i was curious i i talked to him i was like you how do you do this and like i know you believe in western medicine he's like nah western medicine of course i believe in it but it's just like it's so small just scratch the surface like this is this like and i was like okay i feel good about that um so yes i have in my head the conversation that we had here and i'm like wonder and i'm like fuck i hope i didn't get got i'm just like so we start the whole situation um i i'm starting to feel like you drank the drink i drank the drink you all sit around in a circle we're all sitting around yes my music playing yeah they're like playing the drums and that

kind of stuff you're starting to feel some vibes yes is there any talking that's happening

and what language is it in while the first thing we're doing is like some powder i don't know the names all this stuff like rape and then some other stuff so whatever that's cool but you do

have to take something to get your stomach you don't have another guess just for the joke i mean it's gotta be another another guess that's not rapping it is called that's what it's called

okay so you take the yes you take the because it helps um sorry it helps uh the dmt not get broken down into your stomach after you take the ayahuasca and so but while that's happening it takes a while for it to get in your system so we're all just talking like you know intentions or why you're here or just any comments or whatever and so like everybody's going around and then the doctor is translating everything for me because everybody's speaking in spanish so is anybody sharing some wild ass shit that you're like yo um i would say super wild like there was one girl who like recently got married and she was like conflicted with having to change her last name or her parents are like pressuring her that like oh you're giving up the family

she did ayahuasca to decide whether she should change her no no that was just something that

was on her mind she was the person with the least problem but she's right imagine being the next

person who's like yeah i was brutally a lot so i don't even know i feel comfortable doing this

powder yeah okay um so yeah we're all going around we're doing that and then we finally drink the ayahuasca um is it hot is it cold no it's cold and actually it's like a little sweet but it's kind of bitter it's like the same time like they probably put something to make it a little bit sweeter what color is it it's like a dark dark brown okay yeah um just take that and then they're playing music everybody just starts to lay down because it usually takes anywhere from like 30 minutes or an hour for it to you know feel the effects and so at this point like time is starting to get a little blurry i don't know exactly how long how much time passed by so i'm laying down and then i start to feel like my body getting lighter and it's like it reminded me when i did the past life regression when it felt like my spirit was kind of like lifting out of my body and then it's i'm feeling it elevate and then all of a sudden i'm hearing noises and then i lose concentration and it like dropped back down into me and so then that happened like three or four times and i'm gonna tell you the noises i was hearing i didn't find that till after the fact what it was but i'll keep going so it happens and then i'm like fuck i need to concentrate harder like i'm fucking it up and then it stopped happening and it stopped happening for like 10 minutes and i'm like these motherfuckers god so now it's like mind you they take everybody's phones take your car keys because they don't want anybody like bugging out and shit and so now I'm like holy shit I'm surrounded by a bunch of people laying down I don't want to interrupt this whole thing I'm gonna have to lay here for five hours wide awake sober as fuck with no phone this is gonna be horrible next thought I have I'm being woken up and told I need to hurry up and run upstairs so everybody's in this commotion grabbing their stuff we're running upstairs uh let me just get to that part because i find this out when i'm about to leave why we all had to run upstairs so basically there was a kid there that was doing it 17 and they actually give this to kids i didn't realize this but like in central and south america like they give this like babies they'll put it on their pacifier and like get them used to ayahuasca even at a young age this kid 17 i think like He maybe has like behavioral issues or whatever the case is. So he's seeing one other lady like vomit and then it gets him sick and then he gets upset and he tries to leave. He's like, fuck this shit, I'm leaving. And so they're trying to like, you know, keep him here, calm him down. But he's just like, whatever. He gets access to his phone, calls 911. There's no way. There's no way. So, when they found out that he called 911, now you got a bunch of people laying on the ground high on ayahuasca, which is illegal.

And there's illegals. Oh, no, no, no. Inside and outside, illegal. Bro. So, mind you, I am so out of it, I have no idea what the fuck is going on. I'm just like, I bet my stuff. But you don't think you're out of it.

no it's like at this point do you know like oh yeah high when i when i woke up that point i was

like oh shit this is the real shit like it was a much stronger feeling than that initial situation and i'm like i'm in it but visually you can still see where you yeah so when you open your eyes the world is regular it's not like mushrooms where you're hallucinating or anything like that yeah you close your eyes a fucking movie is going on like what like i'm seeing geometric shapes i'm seeing like the best way i can describe it i don't know you probably didn't see this movie um uh doctor strange uh multiverse of madness where there's a scene where he's going through all these different like different universes and it's like first it's water first it's geometrical shapes there's this glass shattering shit like that i'm seeing that and at the same time i'm having memories from my life just like replaying and stuff like that and then surprisingly enough it's like all stuff from like the past month i'm thinking i was gonna just like oh go back and go into my childhood and it's like traumas and all that shit it was just replaying this last month which was really fun like i see all you guys popped up like uh you know my girl family all that type of stuff but us at the game but it was just crazy it was just all recent stuff And the craziest thing or the biggest takeaway so far that I've processed was that I'm talking to my different consciousness at the same time. So I'm talking to my consciousness, my subconscious, and other things. It's happening simultaneously, and I'm aware of everything. It is so crazy. So imagine this memory is playing. i'm like the director and i'm acting in it and i'm the audience member and controlling the cameras there's one time i'm watching the memory and then it just zooms out and then it's i'm watching it bird's eye view and then there's still geometric shapes going on here while i'm thinking about this memory and talking about it and being in it at the same time like it was nuts you throw up at Yeah, in the beginning stage when you're given the first stuff, that's what makes you a little bit nauseous.

The rape, you threw up not the ayahuasca?

No. So did the police come? They did. And they went downstairs? Yeah, they went downstairs. They cleaned up everything. And so they took the kid, took the mom, they went to the hospital. Mind you, the mom had two other kids there, 8 and 10. Also doing it? No, they weren't doing it. But later on that night, the Child Protective Services came and, like, interviewed the kids. Luckily, everything's fine. The kid's fine. Mom didn't get in trouble. But, yeah.

This is a $200 ayahuasca. You know that, right?

No, no, no, it's not. I find this out after when I'm leaving. And from the girl that invited me, she's like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I'm like, why do you apologize? It's like, no, from what happened. And it's like, what happened? Like, I had no idea. And she's like, you know, all the commotion and the police and all that. It's like, the police are here? Like, now I'm getting where it's like, did I almost get locked up? Like, what the fuck? And then that's when I found out all that stuff happened. And she felt so bad. She's like, I don't want this to be your first experience. You know, I was like, yo, I had the most amazing time.

Did she offer you a free experience?

No, no, no.

That's fucked up. The cops come, they move you to a different room. You got to offer a little rebate.

If you're at a restaurant and the cops show up and they have to be like, hey, we're going to move you to the dining room. They're going to comp the meal. You got to comp the meal.

I don't know how much cheaper she can make it. But that's the thing.

Like, trust me, the lady that does this, she's been practicing medicine for like 35 years. Her parents and her grandparents all did this. Like she's from a lineage of like medicine people. Ayahuasqueros. Yeah. And so she has a license from the Colombian government that.

allows her to travel with. Because I was wondering, I was like, how do you get it into the States? She's like, no, no, she legally can travel with all the stuff. Out of Columbia. Out of Columbia. But you can't, getting it into America is. No, no, no. Like, she can travel with it. She just can't give it out. That's the only one. But she can travel all around the world with it, but you're not supposed to, like, give it to people.

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Zip Recruiter. Now let's get back to the show. Hey babes, it's Paris Hilton. So I was checking my points balance in the Hilton honors app the other day. And yeah, I've got about a billion, which feels excessive even for me. Just kidding. You can never have too many Hilton honors points and I want to do something iconic this summer. So I'm giving away all my Paris points. Just find somewhere you've always wanted to stay. Then go to my socials or Hilton's and tell me about it. Just make sure you're a Hilton honors member and I might be sending you Paris points because when you want points that make your summer even hotter it matters where you stay so what were your

takeaways from these like visions you were saying like i'm still processing a little bit of it but yeah it's i can just tell like this is scratching the surface like i know now and i was already like of course we're so small in this grand but you get a better understanding of how small we

really are and what gave you the what gave you that feeling what are the visions it's it's not

necessarily a vision it's like a feeling and it's like oh wow i can feel how small i am in this grand scheme of things and it's it's like some of some of these shapes and things like i can't even imagine seeing the things that i saw like i'm like seeing stuff for the first time it's just really it was such it was enlightening it was really fun because i was like scared i was like oh fuck what if i don't come back what if this changed me forever like i was scared going into it i will absolutely do it again really absolutely without a question i'm gonna wait some time i want to like think journal a little bit process probably maybe like a year oh okay yeah all right all right so you're not in any rush no experience again and so uh the doctor he put it the best way he's like think of the medicine like your iphone you can pick up your phone you have access to all the information in the world but when you pick it up you only get a little bit of information what you're searching for that one time yeah it's like when you take the medicine you have access to all the answers of the universe but every single time when you sit with it you're only going to get a little bit and it's going to be a different experience every single time no two times are going to be the same and it's like think of it like information he's like some people go into it looking for like oh i need to be healed or whatever he's like no you're just getting information do with that information what you want yeah that's why i was like i really think mark especially because this mr curious he wants to know everything and i'm like you would absolutely love it and it doesn't feel like you're on drugs i love the fact that i open my eyes and the world is regular that's it was comforting i'm like oh even though this shit lasts like eight hours

yeah there was a time i woke up and i thought it was done because i was like okay because you feel it it comes in waves so like when you close your eyes when you're like at the top of the wave the everything going on is a lot more and then when you're when you're at the bottom of the wave it's like it's still happening but it's like less intense so when i was like towards the end of a wave and then it wasn't coming back i was like okay i guess this is towards the end and and maybe like probably like six hours passed by or whatever. I was like, okay, makes sense. So like I start to get up, walk around. I have like a banana. I like eat a little bit, drink or whatever. And then I was like, I'm kind of feeling tired. I sit down for a bit, close my eyes. Boom, I'm back. Yeah, I wasn't done.

Feelings of interconnectedness?

Not so much. I was thinking, because from all the research I've done and people that I've talked to who have done it, they're like, oh, they can feel or see the other people in the room. I had none of that. Like, it felt like I was alone when I closed my eyes. Yeah.

Do they use tobacco at all?

Yeah. That's one of the things they give you. And that shit is weird. It's like, they like blow it up your nose. And it's like, it's intense as fuck. That shit, like, I was like, whoa. And that gets you back. No, no, that's in the beginning, Sage. It kind of like, they say it cleanses you and helps your body be more open to what's about to happen. Yeah. Right. Holy shit. Yeah, I'm telling you, everyone should do it.

Any experience that you had or anything that you thought about that you won't share?

Good things, but I thought about my girl a lot. And in a way where it's just like, oh, I need to be better. Because she's like, amazing.

Oh, so you had a lot of gratitude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's good. It's Mother Gaia. See, that's what happens. Mother Gaia, man. That's what I'm saying.

Ayahuasca is a, you see the female, the perfect female, the divine female. That's why women are cool with us taking it, you know what I mean? And then you take it and you come back out and you're like, dude, my girl's awesome. You know what I'm saying? They're like, yeah, take it again. Who cares?

Yeah. I'm telling you, I know you're convincing me a little bit. Yeah, but I like, it doesn't even feel like one of those things you can take and go crazy. everybody there is like all right regular normal you feel normal yeah and then when it's over everybody's back to being normal yeah it's like there's no hangover feeling like i felt perfect

i'm always curious how they figured it out that's the thing i can never i can never get to the bottom of break it down like because i forget exactly where ayahuasca like originates it was like the jungles of like i don't know brazil maybe i don't think it originated in one place

like I think indigenous culture is all through like central and south we're doing versions of it

but I'm like you have to take two brews for it to work yeah and I'm like how did they discover these two things when you mix them together and you drink them simultaneously or one after the other that it creates this effect it's like an Arnold Palmer but how who figured out the Arnold Palmer well someone fucking loved Arnold Palmer I do think it was probably a mistake you love lemonade

you love iced tea and then you go that could be good together yeah like you just mix and shit Like, have you ever tried mole? Yeah, mole's fire. Yeah, back in the day, making food was just mixing shit to see what happens. So I don't think they intended it to, like, make you meet Mother Gaia, but they ran out of cilantro, and they're like, all right, throw that in there. And then they had an awesome dinner. Oh, this batch of fucking tacos is incredible.

I do want to try smoking the DMT because it's, like, much shorter. Like, this is like you have to fucking devote a weekend to it.

Yeah, it's such an Americanized version of it.

Yeah.

It's like, okay, well, what's the fun part? Oh, just the DMT? Okay, we'll find a synthesized version of that, and then in and out, and then done.

They used to, in Amazon, they would smoke it, too.

But they could isolate the DMT to smoke?

Yeah, because it's really just like a root. You grind it up, and yeah, smoke it. Boom, takes you there immediately.

Yeah. I remember a girl at Burning Man offered me some. This was like, this was years. I think it might have been my first burn. and i was just kind of like wandering maybe my second i forget and then like i met this girl and it was just like instant vibes and we're just kind of like talking and then she's like here do you want i was like what is it because i didn't even smoke weed i think at the time whatever she's like it's dmt and i was like i think it was a pen does it come in yeah okay yeah and i was like ah i'm good and the second i said i'm good it was like some sort of cosmic separation between the two of us i don't know what that was about and it didn't feel like i wonder if she was already high

probably with like you know what i mean with all the respect i mean you're a catch don't be wrong you know i don't want you to get the wrong but she was definitely tripping balls

Well, like me saying no, like, I don't want to say scared her, but like. It was like, oh, we're not on the same vibe. I'm on a wave right now, and I think you're on the same wave. And then you're like, nah, I'm not on the wave. And she's like, oh, we're not.

Like the initial moment felt like it was like the world presented us to each other or something like that. And then I was like, I think I'm good on DMT. And then it was like, the world has not presented us.

It was that stark a separation. My buddy has such a funny story of doing DMT. Maybe I've told you before, but in brief. he had like written out this whole journal and he was like, okay, I want to work on this and I need to think about this thing and my relationship with this person. I had this whole thing, lays in his bed, rips the pen, falls back, and then goes and sees a bunch of like elves and the elves are like...

Isn't that part of it? Do you see like the gnome or something?

Yeah, which I think happens more with DMT than ayahuasca, but it's like results may vary. And he like, he's in a waiting room and they're like showing him pictures and stuff and they're like, yeah, you can't go in yet, you're not ready. And he's like, come on guys, let me in. And then they're like, all right, fine. and so then they open up and he goes in like a club and there's like an elf DJ and like all the elves are partying and they're like yo he's here and they're all excited like yo the dude's here and they're like showing him around and they're showing him all the shit and it's legit it feels like five minutes and then he walks out back through the same waiting room to show him some more pictures they're like look at our furniture and it's all like weird fucking like dolly-esque furniture and then he like zaps back out just laying in his bed and then looks at his notes that have like think about your mother and he's like the fuck we just went to a party with the elves and they were like yo and that was the whole experience so he was like I didn't really get much out of it but he said like his takeaway was like that's kind of the point is that I went in trying to fix my whole life when really I just need to be kind of having fun and let go

and I was like oh that's a good way to let go I'm glad that I did this because I've been thinking about doing ayahuasca for years now but it was like nah I want to be in a place where I'm like I feel good you know like not like oh I'm working through something yes

you don't want to i love the fact that the the ayahuasquero said that it's not a place to go for a quick fix yeah i think a lot of times people are like either really suffering or dealing with something and then they go there for this quick fix but going there for exploration and like being open to whatever interpretation of these events yeah you have yeah i think that's a good reminder even for life you know like i think so often we're trying to like control life and uh allowing yourself to interpret life in either the best or worst possible in a way for whatever you're going through is a choice. And sometimes I guess we need to induce it with drugs.

And then maybe you being all the people in the play is kind of a part of it, you know? It's like you are the person watching this right now. You're me. I'm you. You're Miles. And maybe we're all the same thing. Fucking homo. And then you left that and you went straight to this. Oh, yes. Did you literally go straight from there directly to this concert?

No. I first did an episode of AM Mornings. So I slept. I actually drove home Saturday night. So I got there Saturday early, like 8 a.m. We drank around 10. And then I think I left around midnight. So I left, slept in my own bed, woke up. Are you eating anything while you're there? No, not really. Were you starving at the end of it? yeah like when i got home i like found pizza and i went yeah because you have to fast like the day before so day one i'm at the jay-z concert and i was in the suite with charlemagne and you know suite they have all this food drinks can't touch any of it what about water water yeah that's only

the but imagine just like oh all this food i know also vibes probably immaculate yeah but the

The concert, it was fine. I was still amped up, still had all the energy in the world. Okay, tell us about the Sunday Jay-Z concert. So the Sunday Jay-Z concert. So I get there, and I was worried.

For anybody unaware, Sunday, something happened, and they delayed the concert start for like four hours. Yeah. So that's why Sunday was different than the other days.

This is at Yankee Stadium. It's like a massive. Yep, at Yankee Stadium.

So break it down, what's happening?

So I get there around 8.15. The show's supposed to start at 8, but I remember Friday, the show didn't start until almost 9, so I'm like, whatever, I was taking my time. So I get there, and when I got there, they already said, oh, gates are closed. I'm like, what do you mean gates are closed? And so they're like, we don't know, security issue. So I'm texting everybody. I'm hitting trial main. I'm hitting this security guy inside. It was like, all right, so what I'm hearing is that people showed up early. They bum rushed to get inside because they didn't have tickets. and it's too big of a security risk for yankee stadium because if they got in with a weapon now yankee stadium's liable if anything happens and it's just going to cost them way too much money if some shit happens so

So it seems as though they locked down the doors and tried to track all those people that came inside via cameras. Whoa.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

That's what I'm hearing from the security people. And this is a video of people getting in.

So there were people who bum-wrested and got in.

Yeah, yeah. So imagine if any one of those people got in with a gun. Oh, my God. And then goes on like a mass shooting or whatever. That Yankee Stadium is closed for air. Or new owners are going to have to take over.

And if you're someone that snuck in, you're like, yo, I'm just going to hide out in the bathroom for an hour, wait for the concert to start. They're going to start eventually, and then I'll just walk in.

So now they have to go through all the fucking cameras, try to track every single person in this giant stadium. And it took them about three and a half hours. And they found all the people? I'm not sure, but I would think so. If they went through with the show, I think so. But Jay-Z didn't start. People inside were upset. People outside were fucking pissed off. It was...

I knew somebody left. He was there with his kid.

Yeah, a friend of mine left, too.

Ten minutes before he started. I know, waited four hours, and then he heard rumors that they weren't going to start. So he got his kid who got school in the morning. It's like, oh. I kept checking with Charlemagne.

I'm like, Charlemagne, you're a Rock Nation employee, right? Is this show happening?

Dub was there, and he was texting me, and he was like, yeah, I'm with the Live Nation guys right now. They said they're going to do it.

Okay.

It's going to happen. So I was like, okay, it's going to happen. about how long they're going to push it, and then are they going to do anything in the interim? Like, what is the... I think they just had a DJ on. Barely almost. Yeah. And then, okay, so once it goes, the concert's going to start. What is the reaction?

Oh, everybody, like, instantly forget that they were just upset, and it's immediate hype. So, and what is the first sound that they hear? I think he started it with the intro to Reasonable Doubt, which is just like a heartbeat.

Yeah.

And so like once people heard that, it's just like,

ah, yeah. Because I imagine a lot of people that night were like, yo, it might not happen. Yeah. So they went from it might not happen to it's going down. Yeah. So immediate energy.

Once they opened the gates and started letting people in, we figured, okay, the show is going to go on. Because like, Got it. why would you let everybody inside if you planned to?

And first night was Eminem as a guest? No.

Beyonce. Fuck. Dream, Memphis Bleak.

Oh, that was First Night?

Yeah. Beyonce came out First Night and Third Night. And Last Night.

Wow. And then also Rihanna?

Yeah. Fucking Rihanna, Young Cheesy, fucking Jada, Fat Joe, Pharrell. It was crazy. Honestly, probably the best concert I've ever been. Really? But of course, I'm biased. This is my favorite artist. but the fact that you just have all these heavy hitters that they're one, waiting four hours for the show to start. As Beyonce you may wait four hours and Rihanna and all these people. Fucking Young Jeezy, I heard, cancelled his own show to be there.

He had a show there. Was it cool being in Yankee Stadium? Like a concert there.

It felt so New York. I bet. The opposite of the next game.

in san antonio yeah yeah but i got pretty new york too no but i know how you were saying

like it msg didn't feel like game three yeah game four it felt like oh okay but game three but again

i was in a box game three game four i was i was in the but this felt like you you know like this was also even if you're not from new york you you dress in a park because you know it's a new york

Yeah, a lot of Timbs, a lot of Timbs. But I'm telling you, it was like, I would say average age is like mid-30s. At least. Yeah. But this shit was fire. I was so hyped, man. It was probably the best weekend of my life. Really? Yeah. Like, I don't know how to adopt this.

So nobody, once it started, nobody cared. Nobody cared. And then it went on for how long, the concert? Two and a half hours, something like that? Three hours. Oh, my God. So people didn't get out of there until three in the morning. Yeah. I didn't get home until like 4.45.

Wow. Wow. Oh, DMT is still ripping through your face. Nah, it was completely dumb.

And everybody just hyped, even in the box.

Everybody was just... Because it was such a good show. It's like, how could you be mad? Yeah. Like, everybody's like, I'm fucking, like, I'm in, like, the little 100 section. I should have been on the floor, but whatever. I'm in the 100 section, and it's like, I'm around some heavy fans. Like, I'm just vibing with the fans that are, like, super hardcore. We're just rapping every single lyric. Yeah, yeah. And then the girls around are just, like, making hype with Beyonce. It comes out and shit like that, but I'm just up. I know whoever was behind me was pissed off because I didn't see it there at all. Oh, it was so fun.

I wanted to go, man. Why did you go?

You're a J-Finn.

Genuinely, I...

I don't know I just want to be with the family I don't know I know it sounds like I respect it but this was a moment I know I thought about it but it was like same reason I didn't go to the what's it called the world cup the same reason I didn't go to the Conor fight my buddies are all going to the Conor fight he's fighting Max I got some friends flying I'm doing this movie out in LA and, like, I don't know, my family's not going to come the next two stints I go out there and, like, I don't know, the kids are at, like, this awesome age. And I've had kids late. So all my friends with kids are telling me, like, man, it goes fast. And I keep thinking about that every single time my daughter's like, Dad, can you give me a bath? Or, Dad, like, or she wakes up at night and she's asking me to, like, lay down with her and I think about that. Like, literally every single moment I'm just like, all right, how many times am I going to be able to do this? how many times am I going to be able to pick her up and throw her in the pool like eventually she'll get to an age where either she's too heavy or she's like dad stop throwing me up in the air pretty soon

like 7 years 8 years

yeah so like I don't know I just frame things in that way and that's awesome I respect yeah I want to just spend as much time with them as I can and I don't she would have been high and again like I think if it's like I knew I wasn't going to be away for 10 days in LA and then come back for 4 and then away again for 10 days. I think I would have been no question, let's do it. If I was just hanging in the city and then there's no question, I'm going out and going to it.

That's why I'm excited for my kid to get old enough where I can start taking them to stuff and have them appreciate it because then you don't have to choose. Then you just get all the love. It's like, hey, someone has an opportunity to go to a thing, buy a ticket, bring your kid. He has an amazing experience. And then you're like, oh, great. I just did all of them.

My daughter comes with me everywhere, bro. Yeah. I brought Jesus to the Knicks gate. That was crazy. But it is a weird feeling. It is a weird feeling because like i don't feel the fomo yeah but if you asked me four kids i would feel it isn't that

so funny the people ask me it's like man you probably gotta like give up a lot of stuff it's you don't give up you don't feel like it you do way less stuff way less and you don't go to things yeah but it's not fomo no it's like sometimes i'll have the opposite fomo because i've gone to stuff and been like i would have much rather just done bedtime or like my wife will send me a picture of like them reading and i'm like i should this seems way better yeah like i'm standing in the heat

right now like i'm this sucks yeah and especially given the nature of what we do we already are going to be spending less time with them because we'll be on the road we'll be doing a project or something so it's if we're just doing working every single day during the week and then you get to see them for dinner and you get to see them on the weekends like my folks did for me it's like okay well yeah go rip a concert go do whatever but it feels i think it feels a little indulgent when i'm already taking the time time away but yeah i was i was surprised to not feel like the it looks so cool and it looks so awesome there's a part that wants to go and that's where you wish you could teleport yeah that's where you're like oh can i take a helicopter and then drop right you know like you start doing the logistics of it yeah but but yeah i don't know for whatever reason i did i was like stoked that like dub was texting me what's happening i'm in bed like texting i'm like really like interested like excited by it and i'm texting charlemagne like what do you think is actually happening like and he's texting jokes back that i'm taking serious and i'm like do i share this with other people who are asking me what's happening like like charlotte told me something that it was the reason for why it was delayed they're like i didn't think it was a joke at first and then eagle wit you know the comedian eagle is texting me like yo do you know what's happening and i almost texted it once it goes to eagle and i had to hit charlotte back Like, yo, is this a joke or not? And then he just ha-ha's it. I'm like, ooh, thank God I didn't start that rumor. It was very close.

You probably made the right decision not going to the McGregor fight. Bro. With or without kids in the equation, because that was sad. Yeah. It was just tough to watch. Yeah.

Ayahuasca, one day, it felt like I missed so much. The next day, people told me that fucking, what's it, Mitch McConnell died? Oh, the other one died. Yeah, Lindsey Graham. they're like yo did you see this connor fight i'm like yeah how'd i miss so much i watch it will change the world no the connor fight man that was uh it just kind of a bummer you know

it was it was a bummer because like regardless like i'm happy that max won but it's like i think even max is like i feel bad for max a little bit i want to fight like i trained a lot for this i

did a whole camp yeah and it's like yeah there's multiple ways of looking at it right because you're like i feel bad i there's the part of me that like never wants max to get punched again because i just think he's just the best guy yeah and i'm like wait you can make tons of money and not get punched that's awesome yeah but there's also part of me that looks at like this man has dedicated his life to this thing and he only gets to do it 35 times in his life maybe Thank you. Total. Is that the guy who almost fucked up Mark? No? Oh, damn. No, Max would never. Max would never. No, that was one UFC motherfucker.

He almost fucked you up. Oh, no, no. That's good.

That's good.

That's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no. And that guy would. He absolutely would. But no, Max is the boy, bro. And you hung out with Max. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's just a true Hawaiian.

Yes, he's. Like, that's the only way to really describe it.

Shout out Wainai, bro. Shout out Wainai, man.

He's a fighter. but that is kind of the Hawaiian spirit a little bit that's it like they will scrap and throw down but also it's like shoot spread out

it's both yeah just the most smiley relaxed people who will absolutely beat the fucking dog shit out of you yeah okay do you think McGregor he was injured before yes so the question I think now isn't whether he was I think it's whether he was aware of the extent it is very possible that he just jumped does the kick and then lands in that angle and you can see the knee kind of buckle inward which is like usually what an acl or mcl injury is but it's also the case that these guys in fight camp no guy goes into a fight healthy you are literally fighting to train for a fight have you ever had a fight that you walked out and you're like oh i feel great you know what i mean like i was fucking jogging yesterday i rolled my ankle it's a it's two weeks yeah so it's like and these guys are doing that every day for training so everything i imagine hurts going into a fight so no one's 100 healthy but you fucking stiff upper lip it the question is i heard he was practicing that exact kick in the locker room they show a video of it and he looks perfect and it looks good okay and now everybody's reading into everything he was taking off his shoe and he kind of like hobbles a little you know there's all these different things the way that it what i thought was so interesting about it and i think there's a lot of things they're adding to it is if you looked at his demeanor day of the fight it was so different than we've ever seen connor look going into a fight what do you say i don't know if again keep in mind he hasn't fought for five years he got too into alcohol and maybe other substances he even acknowledged as much and that kind of got like a grip of him and then it looked like he had pulled himself away from that we hope and then dedicated himself one more time and i think he was looking at this as like this beautiful rebirth you know like maybe he connected with god in a different way and he was hoping to have that same rebirth and then he went back to the source of all his pride did he wear the money did he no that's the secret that's that's the problem if he's if If he's reborn, he's still in the dark. So I wonder if it's like, so there's a part of it where I felt really bad, because I imagine he was like, I'm going to be reborn in this thing that I dedicated my life to before the money, before the fame, when I was doing it just to be the best at this specific thing. And then he goes out there, tries to do it, then immediately snaps in, and he can't even deliver. Even if he went out on his shields, he could do it with a sense of bravery and honor. but going out on like that, it's like. It's just sad. And there's a moment where it looks like he like breaks down in the ring. He like, Max says something to him and then he like covers his face and he like, I think goes down on his knees and then he gets back up and I think he tries to like fight through it. But of course, you know, Twitter and Reddit are going to do all these things, but oh, he was going to a pain management institute and all this other stuff. And it's like, okay, yeah,

maybe he was feeling pain because he's kicking shit for two months getting ready for a fight.

Yeah. it just sucks people are like why would he open up with that kick i saw a compilation of him

opening like all of his fights yeah he does yeah he does like a crazy thing yeah but again it's just like it's just what you would hope that he wasn't injured going in there's a chance that his knee was compromised like his elbow's been compromised or his leg isn't compromised like when he fought dustin and he shattered his leg it's like that was probably compromised going in But he was like, you know what? I'm going to fight anyway. When he won the championship and then won the other one at the same time, he was also probably compromised. So I wonder if in your head as a fighter you're like, yeah, yeah, my knee hurts. My shin hurts. My fucking jaw hurts. But, like, this is what we do.

It's probably an age recovery thing as well. Oh, of course. Like, yo, my knee hurt like this five, ten years ago. And I fought through it and won. But it's not the same knee.

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And even his response here is kind of sad. Again, I have like a little bit of a soft spot for Connor. I know, like, reputationally, there's all sorts of things going on. But even just reading this, it's like, damn, like, my head's gone, destroyed. I had no injury. Injuries going into the fight. I was throwing kicks, planting, jumping throughout the camp as well as backstage before the fight. Came out of nowhere. I'm beyond dark here. I can only describe it as hell. Damn. I was so sharp and so ready for this fight. Can't believe what has happened. The talk of me being off while walking into the fight is nonsense. I was calm, ready, and confident. I'm in shock. What is taking place? the devil is literally staring at me right now in front of my face here, I'm not engaging we'll be at church tomorrow, I will overcome check on check on Connick, ref

oh absolutely, check on him

like that's a dark

that he's like very much found God again again it's difficult to know like really what's going on but

and it seemed that he had found it before and like yeah I don't know, I have a soft spot for him as well like he reached the pinnacle the highest of the highest and i think that like he was so he was getting asked questions in his conference like you know sometimes maybe it feels a little different from your support from ireland like i don't know maybe the irish support for him lessened or whatever i don't know exactly what the relationship with him and ireland was but like yeah you almost like you just kind of want to see somebody who's who's had it then he's down and out and struggling like get another chance to live up to that thing that he could possibly be and um maybe it wasn't this time but you hope he finds a way yeah you know i mean what a fucking life this guy's lived crazy being on fucking welfare to going to be a double champ yeah making hundreds of millions of dollars and then squandering the thing that like maybe he wanted all the the whole time you know it's like

yeah don't he got a case on him though damn you with the alley got everybody talks about him so poetically but nah like come on I'd be looking past that shit kind of

easy no no I don't think it's because I think a lot of times it's not about yeah but like I don't think it's about the person as much as like

Thank you.

you want to know that that's possible okay in life okay you know what i mean like i think sometimes like people are representations for what we hope can happen in the world you know like you're seeing this guy get humbled humbled now does he still hundreds of millions of dollars he's still a fucking yacht in dubai he can live does he still have a family he still has all the fucking things so we're putting this like sad story on someone who's like he's gonna be all right? You know what I mean? Like, okay, so he didn't get to come back after five years and then knock out one of the fucking greatest MMA fighters in history, Max Holloway, and then have everyone love him again? Yeah, it does seem... We wanted to see the Rocky story.

Yeah. That's the thing. I don't know if I have a vested interest in Conor as, like, the person, because I don't know this person. Exactly. But it's sort of in, like, his legend. As a mythical

figure, you want to see... I'm trying to think of, like, a historical archetype. You know, like, I want to... Like Odysseus-type shit? Yeah. You want to see Odysseus get home. Is he going to be able to get home? And who knows what home is. Maybe home ain't knocking people out anymore. But maybe home is helping people. Maybe home is helping the people in Ireland that were in similar situations as him. Do you think he hangs it up? This is the toughest time in any fighter's life. When you get older in general, sports break you. so it's like he's already broken one leg now he's the other knee he's going to recover this and he's going to put so much stress on the other leg while recovering this that that one's probably going to be weaker like what happens is your body gives up before your brain gives up and then athletes naturally are so competitive they don't know what else to do so they'll find this right here never stops thinking you're great or maybe it has moments where you're humble but like never stops wanting to be great but that's why i have so much respect for khabib like at the peak of

his career he's like i'm done i did it i submit to allah i'm gonna train these boys to be great fighters he just like taps out it's like he played it perfectly i respect he did ayahuasca

we're just enlightened people man he got god bro you guys are in the maybe but that's but that's the thing is like and khabib has managed to like stay in the spotlight for sure but i think um but i think what happens a lot of times for guys is like you find out what you wanted in this thing in the first place you know it's like if you like the competition of going out there and just like sparring and stuff you can do that without the bright shiny lights and all the money you know like and maybe khabib learned that he didn't need that maybe he got enough money and then maybe he learned that there was joy in other places some people learn that they like the shiny lights and this is just the only way they could get it and now they have to do this horrible thing for their mind and body so they could get their fix yeah over here yeah which is just the love

and adulation of the people yeah i do like the the catholic turn i mean just posting like the whole creed right here you would i support anyone catholic too but i think he was on it before no i i didn't i wasn't tracking it but seeing it here i'm like fire come on dude i confess one daftism for the forgiveness of sins love that but i mean you know mcgregor's not doing so good but at least mitch mcconnell is uh better than ever it seems like yeah you've seen these videos going around it's so funny he's popping out oh that's fire bro i mean you're telling me this guy's sick dude this guy can definitely run the country he's in a great he's in great shape look at his wife his wife is happy

show them you're okay

The wildest shit is, though, when he has this, whatever, health issue, and then she just went to China for man-in-law.

Yeah. I mean, her job is done. Hey, like, she better go back home before they arrest her ass. Right? Yeah, it's a little sketchy timing. That's funny. Son, they're sketchy. That's crazy.

Did you remember, like, the vice president or something? Think about that. You know what's sick? Go, go, go, go. No, it's just, people aren't really putting enough emphasis on that. In the hospital, your wife just takes a trip. son there's no reason for your wife to take a trip she's not a doctor they got doctors there

she's got stuff to do you know bro that's crazy that's great if if everything wasn't a conspiracy now like you know how nobody believes anything we can't even like we it's just like i don't even know where the charlie kirk trial is right now like i don't even know what's happening like but nothing is real and nothing is fake we just live in like post-truth or whatever it is right it is a little bit of a shame because if we still lived in the we believe everything era this story and the lindsey graham story would have the internet on fire i don't even worry about this so jimmy kimmel posted a picture on instagram of him in the hospital yeah and i did

him like yo are you okay and he sent me back a twitter of mitch mcconnell and i was like you motherfucker the one time i believe the one time i believe that you keep getting i still think that's holland though i think i think i think i don't know anyway the point being the it's like this is an insane story what they are alleging what the conspiracy theorists are legend the one with mitch mcconnell like when he actually has died and if he's his death isn't announced until after the election then i think they can like just insert anybody that they want

in place is that the idea if it's announced after mid-august they don't have to do a special election and do the original election that they're planning on doing he's retiring the end of god they would do the original but if they do if he dies before they would do a special election and the special election could be screwed up because other people could join thomas massey joins and that's maybe

what they're trying to avoid yes they're trying to so they're trying to say that he's alive when everybody's like nah my man is dead and his wife fled the country yeah and met with like some like high-ranking chinese government people or something like that i don't know the exact details but something like but like what world do we live in where this isn't even a crazy story anymore it's just kind of funny yeah and then like lindsey graham goes to fucking ukraine visits the drone shop visits the drone shop and then gets back in a timeline that according to the iranian twitter channel is not possible to get back and now he's dead and then his sister finishes his turn how the fuck does that work what how you get to throw your sister in all people are talking about is how

gay not even that he possibly got taken out by another country he's just like yo he gave

if i but if i was our government great we had to come and we had to cover up the fact that a foreign country murdered one of our government representatives i would say yo say you sucked his dick because now we're talking about how you sucked his dick not the fact that putin took out one of our oh that's smart our senators and maybe that's why putin took him out because he's gay oh we can't have that shit in ukraine yeah that's what i'm saying it's like yo you're getting too close you're getting too close we don't do that shit over here i'm pretty sure russia came out they said we have no gay people in our country that was like that was iran no i think russia said that like five six years ago lesbian singing girls they got them out they still in here bro get out what was the name of that band i think they lost pussy riot pussy riot they locked him up. They locked him up. Yeah. And then they had Brittany Griner for a little bit and they were like, get out of here. We'll trade him for anybody. We'll trade him for Jonah Hill in that movie. Or Nicolas Cage. Yeah. Yeah, but it is crazy. To me, I'm like, these guys are just so old. Like, he's regardless of his health or whatever. Lindsey Graham was not that old, bro. He was 70 years old. 71. 71 is not that old, bro.

Fair. Fair. The average age of the Senate, I think, is 64. That's nuts. That's pretty old. That's nuts. Is that? That old? That's pretty. You can retire at 65. Yeah. The average. If you fly a plane for Delta.

The average is retiring. If you fly a plane for Delta, they make you quit when you're like 65. 62, I think. It's going down every day. If you were 62 and you're locked in doing weights every day, they say nope. I keep hearing people say this about like, oh, we got to get old people out of the fucking whatever. Like old people out of positions of power, whatever. Term limits, yeah. But like. Age limits. I don't know I think term limits I think term limits Old people are kind of lit Because they've seen it all They haven't seen all of it bro Mitch McConnell thinks He's dancing Mitch McConnell He probably saw the video of him I did that? And he was like No I don't think Mitch McConnell is lit But he's so old Yeah he is old But man The time when he just froze

Like You saw when he He's been dead Yeah He should have been Out of there after that No

Maybe we should put a limit on an age.

But then if the age, then if life expectancy goes up. Yeah, I don't like the age thing because some old people are shocked. Fucking Bernie is still.

Maybe it's some type of quiz. Here's the thing that's interesting. It's like everybody's like, we got to get these old people out of power. And then Warren Buffett, his stock is through the roof and you invest in his stock and you never once were like, Warren got to step down. so as long as you're making money off the old people all of a sudden old people being charged it's more i don't like the opinions of this person that happens to be old bernie they're like they never said bernie should step down one time right they was telling us bernie was alive for four years they were like he's not even old this is ageism but bernie knows baseball stats from the 1800s yeah come on so that's that's gonna be like all right he's pretty good so maybe it's so so that's i guess my point is it's really not about your mental acuity it's not even about your age, it's just about your opinion. an Instagram live, and we got to test if you're still locked in. If you can... I can't even do that, probably, technologically speaking. Big Zib-A-D-A. You can't do the podcast no more, son. You got to hang it up, bro. You thought the Hollywood video was real. That's what I'm saying, dude. That shit is real, bro. Tell me it doesn't go with his personality. It perfectly goes with his online personality. That's how they get you. That's how they get you, dude. That's a good video. They got to do some type of test to see if you're still mentally sharp. I don't know exactly what it is.

Yes, that I agree. Yeah, but then you got The motherfuckers.

Trump says, oh, I passed it with flying colors. Perfect score. If he did, then you let him run. I'm just saying you got to. Why don't we do term limits like you said? Yeah. Why don't we do four? What is it? For House of Representatives, you do like four terms. For the Senate, you just do two terms because now you're in power for 12 years. That's a lot. That's a lot. And then for. I give them four for the House. Four. Yeah. So now you're at eight years. Yeah. I'm sorry. That's what I meant.

Yeah.

Fuck it. Do six. So now both of you can be in power for 12 total years. And you have to be able to use Uber Eats pretty quick or something. There's got to be some other type of thing where it's like, oh, no, he knows how to do it. And he knows how to do not delivery or pick up. You know, like, he knows, like, all the buttons. Yeah. There's got to be some other thing. You got to be able to call me FaceTime Audio without the FaceTime coming on. Oh, that's good, actually. That's really good. That's really hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Older people have a really tough time with that. They can't do that shit. Yeah. They can't do that shit. That's impossible. But again, we like our old people that make us feel validated in our opinions. so it's really not about if it's about age we got to keep it a buck across Warren Buffett got to step down okay the McDonald's guy got to go we should talk about elected official nah all old people if it's about age you got to go fuck elected officials everybody old got to step down I don't agree with this personally yeah but I do agree with term limits but should a 90 year old be able to run no I'm trying to figure out a system oh can they run for the first time what about Buzz Aldrin

no he's old my man fucking walked on the moon yeah come on legend no you can't let old people do this shit they gotta have time and I'm trying to figure out the system that works I don't think you should be able to I don't think young people should be able to say anything

well 35 is president no I mean like at what age should you be allowed to say things oh talk? after 25 that's what i'm saying that's even early yeah think about it all the shit not all of it but like a lot of the shit that you do you're like i can't believe i did that like think about any girl that did a fucking bang bus video or some shit while she was in college like she's not doing that at 30 yeah so you can make some mistakes you got until 25 yeah 25 is not bad

but then even then you could talk we might not take you serious yeah there's an interim period

from 25 to like 30 something yeah 30 i think is a good number that's a good number because 30 reality sets and you start realizing like oh the decisions that you make you know definitely are gonna affect the rest of your life and that's kind of that's kind of who you need in elected

positions of power yeah and it's like if you're 30 you're still doing bang butts like all right

that you love that you believe in it that's what a game you ever see them old porn stars like the Old ones, you are loyal to the story, bro. I like seeing them old bitches. Yeah, it's like seeing a legend in the league. You know what I mean? It's like Vince Carter in his last season. You're like, yo, dude, he's fucking built for this. LeBron loves this game. He's got no reason to be playing basketball anymore. He's got all the money in the world. Guaranteed contract. You could go do whatever the fuck you want to do. Yeah, that's love. He loves it. Yeah. He loves it so much, he's trying to not play with his kid. He got his kid the guaranteed contract. The Lakers guaranteed it the next day. LeBron said, I'm out. I'm not signing up with the Lakers. Speaking of that, has he decided where he's going yet?

No, he has not because he's waiting on the trial for Kawhi to pan out. The trial? What do you mean? Oh, the shit that his uncle was doing? The trial. Investigation for Kawhi. Yeah.

I thought he's in Toronto. Well, Toronto's not going to do it until they figure out all the logistics of that thing.

Oh, wow. I thought that was a done deal already. Okay.

Well, I think it was an agreement, but I think the NBA won't allow it to go through until they finish their investigation with the Clippers.

Damn. That's going to be bad because we know he's...

Yeah, that's going to be bad. Come on, bro. Because if it goes through and they let him off, LeBron could take that minimum and then just get paid through.

Let me tell you who's not going to take that minimum. Let's say if he does go, where is LeBron going to go? Cleveland.

I mean.

He ain't going back to Cleveland.

Yeah, so why does the Kawhi thing have anything to do with LeBron? The Cleveland thing, in my opinion, is only because it looks sick. And if the money, if he can take that minimum but make all his money in different ways, then, yeah, he goes back to Cleveland.

Why is he? First of all, he's not taking that minimum. Second of all, why would he go to Cleveland? Legacy player.

Yeah, legacy player. The minimum thing is only because he's going to get paid.

Through other... Why is it a legacy play? Explain that to me. That's where he started. That's where he's from. And he brought it back to them. Yeah, he brings the chip back and then ends his career with the people that gave him a chance where he's from, where he's born and bred. I don't think Andy Michael would give a fuck except the people in Cleveland.

That's what I'm saying. Those are his people. Yeah, but I mean...

His people are where he lives. Exactly. Los Angeles, California. You think his wife wants to move back to Cleveland, Ohio?

No, she's staying in LA.

Yeah. so that he definitely ain't going to Cleveland if his wife says and this is with all due respect but if his wife is like you know what I'm going to stay here with the kids you go wherever you need to go he's going to Miami he might be going to fucking Ibiza does Ibiza have a basketball team there's no way now he's going to fucking Cleveland if wifey's not coming you're out of your mind it's just the legacy bro

he's going to New York he's going to Paris I mean he can't go to the Knicks now though

No, we don't want him.

We won't take him. We don't want him.

If we want to play for free, we won't take him. We wouldn't even take him for free.

The way Lakers fans have talked about this period is so funny. All my L.A. friends are just like, ugh, it's been such a drag. All my L.A. friends are like, this period with LeBron has just been like hopes and dreams and nothing ever actually manifests.

They got a chip. Yeah, they got a chip. They got a little, what's it called, bubble chip.

Yeah, it's like a chip. Yeah, it's like a chip and a half.

They got a chip where they didn't get to witness it, which does suck. Oh, that does suck. But I would also do the Knicks one in a bubble. How would you feel? I would feel elated. I would be right outside the bubble coughing in that bitch. I would have been in the bubble. I would have got it. We would have found a way. We would have been serving chicken nuggets and french fries, whoever the fuck you wanted. I would have been in that bubble. I would have been in that bitch. I would have been in the bubble. Absolutely. I would find a way.

I would find a way. I don't know. I feel like you'd be like, all right, we count on. In the back of your mind, it'd be like, nah.

Bro, you really don't understand how long it's been. I don't.

I truly don't. You don't understand how long it's been.

It came home, dude.

It came home. It came home. We went to San Antonio. Sorry.

Almost got killed. Yeah.

Yeah, put your life on the line.

Put our life on the line for that team. Actually, to get Whataburger.

As big bitches as San Antonio.

It's scary. I thought they were going to be bigger if I'm being 100 with you. The game didn't have that many big ones.

Bargley really did a number on them. That's fucked up because he gave him a bad rap and it's not even that bad. Everybody just says, I thought it was too.

Maybe they took the criticism in stride. Maybe the Zempy came out and they were like, you know what? Chuck's right.

They had an insecurity. They're like, we got to make up for this.

Think about who's got the shiniest teeth in all of Europe now. You know what I'm saying? It's the English, bro. Every time you see an English dude get some money. They all get the big shiny chompers.

Because for fucking centuries They would know for having the worst teeth.

We call them snaggle teeth, angler fish. I know. Yeah, and then all of a sudden they get, you know, 10 grand. Like, I'm getting giant sea biscuits.

But why are they getting the bad ones? Because they do them good. It's not the bad ones. They're getting the big ones. You know what I mean? The flattest girls get the biggest tits. Yeah. Ah, so, I'm like, yo, I'm good now. Yeah, look at me, my teeth go.

You want the natural off-white? I got it. Or do you want the shiny? Yeah. They go, give me shiny, bro. Give me the shiny. I didn't even see it that, but I guess that's a thing.

No, it's bad. I don't even know if they, they don't even put the separations of the teeth sometimes. It just looks like they're wearing like a mouthpiece for like a hockey bag.

They get two teeth put in. Yeah, that's it. Two curvy little teeth. Bang. Never floss again.

They should go to, I think Turkey's doing that, right? They do. Turkey really is upgrading everyone.

Isn't that kind of interesting? Yeah, it's fine. Like you go get your hair done. Yo, is it, can I just ask this question? with this no disrespect to Turkey, but why do they want to make men so handsome? They built their whole economy around making guys hotter. You don't go to Turkey to get new tits or an ass or new liposuction. Turkey's like, come here, brother. We'll make you so hot and handsome. There is a little something gay about guys. Yeah, a little bit.

They need to... They brought the overall average of men up at least two points.

But for whose game, bro? Yeah, but imagine. Yeah. You want a turkey butt lift or a Brazilian butt lift? No, no, no, no.

That's, Al, you're 100% right. But what I'm saying is that, like, I would never even think of going to Brazil for veneers. I know if I want to be hotter as a man for cheaper price, they're making men hot for nothing. It's like they're losing money. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, they're like, yo, we'll lose. We just need you to be hot. Like, they can't wait to make you hot.

Yeah. They need guys to be sexy. We'll put you in a hotel, we'll fly you out, put you in a resort, the whole deal. And it's like two grand. It's crazy. What is that saying about...

Like, I don't, I honestly, I'm trying to not be disrespectful over here, but like, why are they so obsessed with making all the men on the planet look good?

Yeah, well, is Turkey, are they, are they in Burka? Are the women covered? No, Turkey's a secular nation. But it's still a little, I guess it's like monarchical, right? Yeah, well, I'm not. But like, the elections are not always. That's a fair country, Mark. I don't know what you're trying to say. I don't know all the details. I just know. It's a completely fair country. Some comedians get thrown in jail. I don't know. I'm seeing snippets online. Nobody's getting thrown in jail.

What are you talking about, bro? They're going to do a comedy festival. Shut the fuck up. Okay, we're going to go there for fake teeth. We're going to get painted fake teeth in an entrance place. You don't fucking need it, so you don't have to say shit. No, it's, yeah, no, of course.

Yeah, Erdogan is probably a dictator. Maybe. I don't know all the details, but I'm curious what his incentive is to make everyone so hot. It's a good export. you know like i don't want to i don't want to invade turkey i don't want anything to happen to them maybe they're giving themselves some insulation to like hey you really want to fuck with us about where you're gonna get all your hot guys from forever you know it's like they're kind

of you know strategic yeah kind of smart it is i mean it is kind of smart but it is crazy that there's not one other country on the planet that is dedicated to making guys hot they don't even

want you to get fat like they try to give you ice cream they take it away you notice that they won't

let you get do they ever do that to the women no but the second a guy is trying to look not hot even a little bit they sneak that ice cream and then he goes think about it you want this ice

cream and he goes i want it he goes nope no you don't here's a napkin you fat fuck yeah i don't

want a napkin i want the ice cream and they never give it to him never give it to him maybe you get a cone if you're lucky you get just the cone yeah but the ice cream that's way too many calories for you yeah i'll listen i think turkey yeah i think it's turkey and they're rebranding the

name because they're like yo we don't want to be compared to this fat bird that's the whole thing like we're not turkey we're turkey turkey turkey oh really yeah all the world cup announcers like yeah turkey turkey yeah they officially have to call that hearing that and i was like am i

okay guys i think we're on to something we need to ask erdogan what's up yeah because he's he's if there was a country that you would think based on their exports and their economy was a homosexual nation it would be France right? without a doubt it would be France it would be the French there's gayer countries is there a gayer country than France? but what I would say is France has outsourced their making guys hot enough to suck up their cocks a lot right so it's like france is like our economy can no longer support that right we have to put all our money in football and making trans women for mbappe to devour right that's what we have to do but but in terms that we have to find an outsourcing we needed a place to make our sneakers and our clothing right we found china we found a they did that france needs a place to make guys in europe hot so they could have sexual intercourse with them. They were sick and tired of looking through the fucking holes in a British guy's mouth and they're like, there's no way I can put my dick in there. So they found a place that could do it for cheap. You don't think Thailand's a little gayer? No. I honestly, if I'm being honest with you. They're fucking ladies. Yes. I know I'm being honest with you. You gotta be a man first to be gay and I don't know if they get there.

It's just boys to women. gay people don't go to Thailand it's only straight dudes that go to Thailand that's a good point

if you're a gay guy why would you try to be with the most girly looking man that's the least gay you could be it's not the least gay to me that's the least gay it's the least gay gay it's the least gay gay it's the least gay gay in the spectrum of gay having sex with a Thai lady boy I wouldn't even I'd say that's I don't even know if that's gay okay but it's not perfectly straight it's it's more straight than gay let me ask you this question it is way more straight than gay you know them fish that can kind of fly for a little bit are they a bird no no one would call them fish are bird no one called them a bird not one time you'd be like wow those fish can jump out the water for a little bit but then they get back to fishing yeah that's it that's probably i don't even know if there's another four words you know but it makes sense

makes sense. I think you're kind of straight. I think if you're going to Thailand to hook up with a lady boy, I think you're straight in the way that a fish can fly for a little bit is still a fish. Still a fish. When the fish is flying, you're like, is that motherfucking straight? I don't know if that's motherfucking straight. But then back in. Exactly. Yeah. You don't think America's gayer? You've got probably the most gays. Yeah, that's what makes us straight. How does it make us straight? The country with the most gays is the straightest country. Wait, why? Because they can be gay.

Oh, we're the most secure. So we're like, yeah, be gay. It doesn't affect us because we're super straight.

Exactly. Europe is the gayest country because the gays got to pretend to be normal. Yeah. When you meet a gay in Europe, they have no accent change. We allow the gays to be so gay that they have their own accent. They can indulge in who they truly want to be and their identity. You meet a gay in Britain. You meet a gay in fucking Luxembourg. They just sound like a guy from there. What the fuck is the point? What is the point of that? And that's why the French sound the way they do, because they're just all gay. They're just all gay. That's not an accent. It's not an accent at all. It's by design. And so France couldn't make the gays themselves, so they were like, who can do it? No, France wanted the gays to be even hot. France is about aesthetic and experience and pleasure. Everything touches a pleasure center. What smells the best? What tastes the best? What feels the best? Who's the hottest? Okay, we're done fucking ourselves. All the Muslims we bring in, we can't fuck them, right? Oopsie-daisy. They have a religion that doesn't allow us to gay them up. We got to go north. The British come in. It's a fucking jack-o'-lantern. You sticking your dick in a pumpkin's mouth that was carved for Halloween? Are you going to do that? Come on, man. Genuinely speaking.

No, you can't do that.

We've got to see the Tyson Fury fight this way.

Oh, goodness.

Yeah, yeah. but now he can't do it. It's always in fire. You can't do it. You know, he might get nicked on a fucking cooking tooth or something. Nah, he can't. Yeah. It needs to be smooth porcelain. So then you reach out to Turkey and you say, hey. I don't even know if you want to reach out. I think Turkey's like, we want hot guys. But why? Do you know one? No, they're a gay factory. They're a factory for gays. What about the Lebanese? What about them? Aren't they the gay Muslims? I think they just say that about them. because they're kind of accepting of other religions oh no and is that why yeah but also who went into lebanon and taught him a bunch of words the french oh see come on man come on man yo pick your colonizer yo pick your colonizer bro oh man yeah that's a good point it's honestly rock solid french just went around just gaying everybody up if i was turkey and i wanted to throw the scent off the gate trail, I would definitely start doing some things to make women hotter too. That's all I'm trying to say. Do some things to make the women hotter too. Those same surgeries can apply to women. Where do women go to be hotter? Brazil. That's the cheaper place to go. Colombia? Colombia. Colombia. And if I'm being honest, you go to the place that has the most attractive looking women. Yeah. So does Turkey have the most attractive looking men? Is that why men are going there? Are they going, I want to have a hairline like a Turkish guy. I want to have teeth like a Turkish guy. Is this a compliment to the Ottomans? Selective breeding over hundreds and hundreds of years has produced the most handsome men. That's interesting. That's not a bad point. There's a picture of that Ottoman princess. I'm pretty sure you can bring it up. And this is what the most attractive woman in the Ottoman Empire looked like. We could probably get an image of it.

Yeah, she's been touted, at least, as the most beautiful princess.

Yeah, and you're actually nowhere close in that image right there, but you've got to find it.

Yeah, I'm going to find it. But while I pull this up, you really think this guy's gay? Louis XIV?

Was that the XIV? I think so. Who was the Sun King? I think it was him. I don't remember. Because I thought he had golden hair or whatever. They would pay to watch him shit. Really? They had a hustle, bro. Really? Yeah, he would just take a dump. My motherfuckers just sit and watch him in his bedroom. People come from all around the world.

And they also came all around the world to court this woman right here.

Oh, shit. Yeah, FM. That was a... Oh, no. Oh, this is Persia. The princess of Persia, I think. Oh, whoopsie.

But she might have been Ottoman also.

Man, keep that straight close, bro. Keep that shit close. What are we trying to let out of there, man? That's insanity. that's absolute insanity maybe we just don't get it you know maybe there's something that we just don't understand I see why they

went gay bro look at that thing is this a painting or a picture i think it's a photograph oh at least with the paintings you could spruce them up a little bit but photographs back in the day are that is that is it good lord yeah i'm i'm trying to figure out exactly where she's from but i'm assuming this is her again that's got to be her right that's rough

You've got to see the black and white picture of it. I'll pull it out.

Get it up, Miles. I'm texting it to Mark. Get it up, Miles. Wow.

Yeah, it's crazy. Apparently people are lining up. Persians would be nice. Yeah. Yeah. There must have been some inbreeding with this one.

Oh, man, who knows?

Awesome.

Wow. Yeah, she was married to an aristocrat and the son of a defense minister. he divorced her she divorced her husband breaking a taboo and becoming the first woman in the royal family to get a divorce nah she was a man what you mean it just has to what you mean you can't be the first to do that

that was a man bro she tricked him maybe a hermaphrodite

there's no way that's a man bro mustaches on women were a symbol of beauty Princess Fatima Khanum, Estimath al-Dawley, was the princess of Persia. This is Effie, bro.

It looks so much like him. Like, come on.

It looks so much like him. Effie, I love you, bud. Go back. You, this. Can you make that the whole screen? Go back a little bit. Goodness fucking gracious, dude.

Nah.

Why did Disney never make this movie?

Nah, this is the Olympic boxer that... got both the X, Y's and all that.

Go zoom in and go down. This is crazy. Bro, go up. Go up. Go up. Let's just look at that head for a second. There's no fucking way. Maybe she was funny. Nah, this is the first trance. First trance. Brother, that is a thick mustache. I know.

That mustache

put the thing on it's like yo I identify as a woman sometimes you just gotta forget parts of your history man you don't gotta put everything in the book we don't know what Abe Lincoln's wife look like we know the hot wives but we don't gotta know every president's wife that one right there you just gotta push that to the side goodness gracious bro right I really don't think that's it.

I'm reading now. I'm reading about her now. I don't think it's a woman. I really don't. I don't think it's possible.

She learned piano and embroidery from a French tutor. When did she open Halal Guys? That's what I need to know, because that guy has put the fucking white sauce hot sauce on for me for the last 20 years of my life. Look at that fucking thing. Beauty standards change.

Hopefully it's AI.

Hopefully, you know. She looked like Matilda's dad. Danny Nikito? bring on Danny DeVito and Matilda oh no in her book this woman describes how men and women in 19th century Persia describe a certain standard of beauty women prize their thick eyebrows and the hair above their lip to such an extent that sometimes they painted them on with mascara nah

they are gay they even wanted women to look like

men is crazy look dude things change you know I keep staring I can't stop we gotta stop this podcast we gotta end the podcast

anything else just before we go Al's a big fat phony and was here watching the game and his story makes it look like he was watching it in the streets of New York City and he wasn't he was here in the studio I just want to bring that up what did he say

I wanted to watch the game with my girl and y'all wanted to have some long debrief shit back there and so Al is such a fucking part of the post

where I was supposed to be. So you posted like you were in Spain? Nah, but it's celebration for my team. Hold on. No, not Spain. She's up the block.

She's up the block. I think I'm in the streets right now.

It's not even loading for me. I look myself. I look myself. that's the universe it's god right there it's something i don't know what that is yeah dude we're gonna load one do you have it no i gotta bring it up right now it's fine bro also shout out to miles just for being an all-time hater he is he

I'm not letting you get away with this. Oh, no. Come on. We self-brained. This is the streets of New York. Oh, hell no. Oh, nice. Yeah, we don't even know if you're in San Antonio now. We don't know if you went to that Jay-Z concert. Nah. When did you go to this? Nah, it's my girl there. That's what I wanted to go to. And I was like, oh, we got to record. Why did you just repost her? Yeah, why didn't? She didn't post it. And I'm like, oh, this is fire. Yeah, she did.

So you were like, yo, just send me a clip.

We were texting the whole time, and every time we scored, she sent me some shit. Oh, wow, man. I am celebrating, right? Y'all just hate us because your team's lost. My team won. I like to celebrate. My team's still in it. Who's your team? Spain. I'm up for the summer. Oh, okay. There you go.

Yeah, this guy lived in Spain for a long time. That is true. Yeah. He lived in Spain for a while. Yeah, rep your set. I do rep it.

Where's your colors? You're looking kind of French right now.

It's coming home.

oh no I don't want that

do we have anything else we need to hear there was a

famous incident that happened out in one of the national parks that went super viral oh I saw this I'm not sure of the current state of this dude did you see this yeah I saw it I'm not sure of the state of him right now did he make it I think so

if he's alive we're good I think he's good if he's dead we good it's a learning lesson no I would be sad because he died he wasn't there full Yes, it was. He came over to fuck with it. No, he didn't. No, no, no, no, no. You got to watch it. You got to watch it. You guys, he's all the way in the background right there. So how is it not his fault?

Look at the buffalo. It's by a fucking picnic. The buffalo shouldn't be there.

This guy's standing right here. Oh, that's his picnic? He's walking by. He's not camping. He's walking by. He's got suspenders. He's a jolly guy. So why are you walking towards the buffalo? He's not. The buffalo chases them and chases them out of the tree.

It's like a cartoon. He's walking away, getting behind a tree for cover because he's like, oh, this is a little sketchy right now.

Watch. Watch this. It's a cartoon. Literally. Watch. He sees it. This is fucked up, but like...

All of a sudden comes over and goes, oh, shit. Let's get behind this tree.

Oh, I thought it was... No, watch, watch.

And he's hiding. He's hiding. And he's good, right? There's no way this bison's going to get him. Z, you didn't ask him permission to take a picture.

He ran. He runs. the bison follows him he runs he's trying to run around

nah bro he's doing alright right Miles

he's on recovery this is like you know running with the bulls in Spain the American version we do bison though son are you gonna do that running the bull shit no he's just gonna post a video from the inside they didn't stop it I think they did or maybe I don't know. I think they stopped. Or they stopped the Yeah, maybe they stopped killing them. They're killing them. Yeah, yeah. But the run of the bulls is lit. I would love to do that. I went to it. You did? Yeah. Oh, but you

didn't get in? Nah, I was too tired.

You party all

night and then in the morning they run and you're like, I was partying all night.

Were you there for the summer solstice when they do some big celebration in the streets? I don't remember. Bro, it was crazy. crazy like they have bonfires in the middle of streets everywhere people are fireworks everywhere every other block it's like a fucking concert going on yeah but it's like the fact that a calm city allows giant bonfires in the middle of the street crazy it was madness it looked like a war zone

yeah and everybody's just like this is the last video i want to show you guys all right this one popped back up i sent this to you a while ago it's maybe the funniest i think we watched this Did we already watch it? Yeah, I think so.

Hold on, play it. Oh, come on, man. There's no way. There's no way.

There's no way.

So he's trying to jump the fence. He got it, though. He good. He got it. Oh, he's got his pants caught on it a little bit. All right, so he's struggling a little bit. He should be able to get it.

He's running out of energy, right?

He's pretty high up, too, and he's doing a dip. This is kind of hard.

His pants.

That's tough.

There's no way.

There's no way. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way.

there's no way what happens no one knows oh no

and shout out to his boy for never

stepping into hell like that i mean all time great video i mean at a certain point like i don't know when you ditch the pants like right here you're like oh i can save it there you go all right my pants are fully coming off and then here is worst case scenario i mean just dangling upside down

oh god bless this man oh man that's great boys we love you we appreciate you we'll see you next week. Peace.