demands thinking on one's feet. While a prisoner's day is regulated down to the minute, there are still ample situations where thinking on one's feet is essential. As with writing, a prisoner needs to be poised at all times to make changes, quick changes. That includes knowing when to get the hell out of dodge and live to fight another day. Rule number seven is don't be afraid to make a strategic retreat. There are some fights that you just can't win, so there's no harm in just retreating, regrouping, and then figuring out what plan B is going to be. When I published this letter from Loretto, everything changed for me. The guards emailed the letter to each other. One of the guards pulled me aside. She was one that I had just sort of ignored. She ignored me. I would see her in the hall. We wouldn't even acknowledge each other. She did her thing. I did my thing. She came right up to me and she said, that wasn't me you were talking about swearing at you, right? No, you've been perfectly lovely to me. Oh, thank God. Do you mind if I ask you who you were talking about? Sure. It was Sarge. There was this horrible, horrible guard whose surname was S-A-R-G-E, Sarge, like the nickname for Sergeant. I said in the letter, you've heard that phrase, rode hard and put away wet, that was Sarge. She was an ugly, mean, foul-mouthed, tattoo-covered has-been. A woman in her late 40s, maybe 50, who had had so many men who used her and abused her and tossed her aside that she just hated the world. And I said in the letter, she was the guard in my housing unit when I first arrived. And she just could not say my name. She would say Teriyaki, Kirikau, Kirkulu, whatever. I saw her in the hall one day. I was walking with Dave and she said, hey, you. And I turned and I looked at her. Are you the motherfucker whose name I can't pronounce? And I said, Kiriaku. How about if I just call you fuck face? Dave says, classy. I said, white trash is more like it. She heard me. She raids my cell, throws all my stuff on the floor, pictures of my kids, walking all over them. I didn't realize that that was actually a crime for her to swear at me like that. It's not just a violation of Bureau of Prisons regulations. It's a crime. It's a misdemeanor, but it's a crime. The first time you do it, you get a verbal reprimand. The second time you do it, you get two weeks without pay. The third time you do it, you're fired. Well, I didn't report her to the prison authorities. I told everybody in the world what she had done in the letter from Loretto. The other crime that I exposed was one that I've already discussed. It was when the two clowns in the lieutenant's office tried to get me to do harm to this Kurdish prisoner, and then tried to get the Kurdish prisoner to do harm to me.