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this is mojo in the morning this is mojo in the morning mojo mojo and the rocket's red glare

you're not being logical is what i'm saying this is like an orgasm in a cup

Come on, come on. Showtime.

All right, Mojo in the Morning Show. So it's always a good comeback from the weekend when you can find out if somebody that we know and love from our show pooped a bed.

Do you love me?

Honestly, I would love you less if I knew that you pooped a bed. Not that I haven't had poop situations, which, by the way, we have all, I believe on the show, have all admitted that we at one time or another have pooped ourselves. Yes.

Well, you're just in. Two people walking this earth. There's people that have pooped the bed and people that are lying and saying they've never pooped the bed.

Well, over the weekend, I took my five-year-old Smith for a little mom-son date night. And he has been so excited about this since I told him that we were doing it a couple of weeks ago. And so we just hung out and down. Downtown Detroit, which, by the way, there is so much fun, free stuff to do down there. The Monroe Street Midway being one of them. Just like a big outdoor winter carnival. Anyway, so we did that. We walked around, and we saw the tree, and we watched the ice skaters. And then we had a little sleepover down there as well. Well, my mom. Just the two of you guys. Just the two of us. Yep, a little quality mommy-suntime. Okay. My mom had made these chocolate chip cookies, okay? and it's her special recipe. The secret ingredient, I'll tell you, it's vanilla pudding. Makes them very fluffy. Whoa. And the chocolate creamier. So, all right. Real quick. I know. I know. I know it's big.

I love cookies.

It's fluffy. You sounded for a second there like that stone guy.

What? Yes.

I'll bring some in for you. You'll have that same reaction. So I threw a bunch of them in a Ziploc bag and put them in my duffel bag to bring with us just thinking like, oh, okay, you know, when we're in bed at night watching a movie or whatever, which we did end up doing, we watched Home Alone, we'll have a little snack. So I'm a pretty messy eater. Smith's a pretty messy eater. So we are like chowing down on these cookies and we have chocolate all over our hands. It's all over my pajamas.

Cookies with the secret recipe of vanilla pudding.

Okay, you're going to remember this. You're going to remember this. Okay. So I fall asleep. Smith falls asleep. And in the morning, we wake up. We're getting ready to check out. And I always like to tidy up the room so it doesn't look like I'm a huge slab. Are you really that person you do that? Oh, my God, yes. No way. I, like, half make the bed. I clean up the room. I throw away all the garbage. You are a dream for hotel people. Make sure there's no hair in the sink. You know, I just don't want to be labeled a slab. Because they do write notes on your accounts, by the way, at certain hotel chains. Oh, okay. If you didn't know this. I have a lot of friends that work in hospitality. They do. They keep track. They got a long list for me. Okay? So, as I go to, like, throw the comforter over the sheets of the bed, I see that it looks like there are poop smears all over the sheets. Oh, no. But, like, legit. Like, it really doesn't look like it was chocolate. It looks like someone pooped the bed.

Oh, no.

And I'm like, great, because I did meet a lot of listeners who worked there. I'm like, I'm going to get labeled as the radio girl who pooped the bed when she stayed the night. It's going to be in your notes on your file. It's going to be in the notes. Beware, she poops. Now I'm paranoid about this.

So you want to go on record.

I did not poop the bed. It was chocolate chips from the very delicious chocolate chip cookies.

Sounds like exactly what someone would say when they pooped the bed.

With the secret ingredient of vanilla pudding. Vanilla pudding. What kind of pudding was it? Vanilla. Was it pudding in your pants? Vanilla pudding. No.

Put it in your pants. Get a little pudding in my pants.

No, but honestly, I should have taken a picture of it because it was like, it was a disaster.

So, you know what's funny is one of my favorite topics that we can ever do on our show, and we did it so long ago, was when we asked the people who work in hotels, like maids or, you know, cleaning people, what did they find in the room? Like, what was the thing? The person from this room Is going to call us up And say

Shannon from Mojo in the Morning

There's a radio person Actually they already called Our competitive station Hello Dave and Chuck the Freak Hi I just wanted to let you know that Shannon From the Mojo in the Morning show Pooped the bed this weekend Oh my god that's funny So it wasn't poop it was just cookies

It was chocolate chips

It was just cookies.

Or chocolate chunks.

By the way, if you are a maid at a hotel or if you've ever been a maid at a hotel, you've got to call us up and tell us the crazy crap that you guys find in the room. Crap literally, get it? Matt, what's going on? Matt, do you believe that it really was the secret cookies or the special cookies? Or do you believe that Shannon might have had a duty problem?

Oh, she had a duty.

What's going on buddy What are you calling for

Well I heard poop and I had to call Well I had a Story I was at work And my stomach wasn't feeling the greatest And I went to go let out a fart And it ended up Being a shark

At work Was this in front of like co-workers And a whole bunch of people

There was a co-worker there he did not notice I walked away I looked at him I go, oh, I got a family emergency. I got to go. Then I had to call my father-in-law, who's my boss, and drive an hour home from work with a shark.

By the way, there is nothing worse than when you lose that little bet that you have, that little run-in that you have. That's like the worst feeling in the world when that happens to you.

Oh, yeah. I got some shark stories. I bet you.

You sound like a

What's up, Sue? Hi, Mojo Hi I've got a disaster story to tell you

Oh, jeez

This happened back probably like six months ago Me and my boyfriend were visiting his son And we drove separately And we drove home at the same time And I said, well, I've got to stop at Kroger and pick up a few things So he said, okay, I'm leaving a few minutes behind you And so I'm in line at Kroger's. I'm just like, ugh, my stomach feels funny, but I'm only five minutes away from home. Okay, I can do it. And I literally, like, walked out in the parking lot, pulled out to the stoplight right by Kroger, and I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. I can't make it. Oh, no. So I pull into the speedway, which is right on the corner, and I'm pulling in. I'm like, oh, my God, I can't make it. I can't make it. And then right there and then in my car.

Oh, no.

Somebody made a stinky.

Oh, my God. That's the worst. The worst is when you're trying to go to the gas station to go get it done, and then they tell you that their restroom's out of order.

Right. Right? So I'm driving home, and my boyfriend passes me, and he calls me. He's like, hey, how are you doing? I'm like, oh, my God, you've got to go home. Lock the dogs up because I get running out.

Oh, my God. Why do you need to lock the dogs up? Why do the dogs need to go home?

Because they're going to jump all over me now. Oh, my God. I'm sure they were going to be like, what the hell were you doing?

You told us we couldn't do that in the house.

Do you remember what you ate? Do you remember what it was?

It was just regular food. I didn't agree with you. It goes from zero to nothing. It's the worst.

By the way, the guy behind the glass at the Speedway, they know, they can tell by your face and the dance you're doing, they can just say, oh yeah, it's out of order. Our restroom's not working. because they know when they got one of those customers.

The convenience stores of Speedway. Let me go to Amanda. Are you there?

Yeah, I'm here.

Hey, Amanda. You're calling up with the mess in the hotel room story?

Oh, yeah. It was horrible. So I worked at a hotel in Chesterfield, and we actually had the MTV crew there filming for 16 and Pregnant. And me and another maid went in there to go clean the room, and they had weird frosty all on the walls, And there was condoms in the bathroom And we literally had to leave a note on their Hotel room basically saying We couldn't clean their room until they had cleaned it Before we got there

Oh wow Okay so Shannon says that you guys do make notes About the people that stay in the rooms Like when they're Excessively dirty

Yeah we had to leave a note on there And we had to send them a letter into their room Basically letting them know that we couldn't even enter there Until they had cleaned it up Wow that's really bad

What was the stuff smeared on the walls?

Frosty from Wendy's. They had literally taken it and smeared it on all the walls. What the heck? I have no idea, but we went in there, and they literally had to steam clean the walls and everything. The whole room was atrocious. It was bad.

I remember having to go down to the lobby. We were visiting Jacob in Chicago, and Luke and I ordered room service buffalo wings. Oh. And we ate them and Luke was sitting on the bed And the red got all over The comforter And I wanted them to know it wasn't blood Because I thought to myself oh my god They're going to think that somebody was murdered in there So I go downstairs and have a talk And the guy behind the counter goes This is no joke, he goes Can you bring it down to me? I'm like I'm going to carry What looks like a blood stained comforter Down to you Can you just have somebody come up and get it? And the guy's like well we're kind of short staff right now So I carried what looked like a bloodstained Buffalo Wild Wings cover.

That guy wanted you on camera carrying that. Oh, yeah?

He's going to use a picture.

I'm like, I'm the guy. I'm the guy that they're talking about. Oh, Laura. Laura, are you there?

Hi.

Hey, Laura. Did you work in a hotel? No. Or were you the guest?

I was a guest.

Oh, okay. What happened?

Well, this was over last winter, and I was living in the hotel, so i was waiting for my apartment so after working a 12-hour shift um i'm gonna take my daughter to school the next day and i kind of had to clean it so it's a whole night and all day by the time i went to the hotel in the bathroom i ended up clogging it i called the hotel maintenance and i told him hey my eight-year-old daughter clogged the toilet and when i took my daughter to school i had to call a different hotel make reservations so i didn't have to be the office

Wait, I love how you blamed me on your eight-year-old daughter, too. I have to go back to the hotel at that time.

I've done that as a parent. I have blamed my kids for my sins. What's going on, Julie?

Hello.

Hey, what's happening? What happened?

So I worked at a hotel way back in my early 20s, and a really nice two gentlemen came in, and they were super nice, didn't pick nothing of it. I went to go in their room the next day, and there was poop, literally poop, smeared all over the wall.

Oh, no.

What were they doing?

Yeah.

Why? It's raining from the ceiling. So I call my boss, and I'm like, look, they're like, well, you got to get it clean.

You drew this short straw. Julie, I did a phone scan once where I called a hotel front desk to apologize for pooping in the pool and i was so surprised by the nonchalant attitude it was like you know they have seen some blank they've seen some stuff because it doesn't even shock them anymore when you work at the front desk of a hotel it seems like just another one monday by the way they

just seems like such nice guys coming into the hotel room right who would have thought how did it get so high animals like throwing it something like that oh thank you for the call We appreciate it. Have a good day. All right. We went through 30 lines. We have not found the maid at the hotel that you and Smith stayed at this weekend. So they did not call. So they did not recognize. Maybe they tasted it. Did they taste it and go, oh, that's chocolate.

Do you scratch and sniff?

I don't think so. I hope not. That tastes like pudding. People are eating breakfast right now.

Hey, Mom, now that I have an after-school job, I think I want to buy a drum kit.

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And next month, I'll buy the bass drum and the cymbals. Oh, and maybe some noise-canceling headphones for you.

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