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Mojo. This shows up. And the Rockets red glare. You're not biological is what I'm saying.

This is like an orgasm in a cop.

Showtime.

all right it's mojo in the morning i would i want to tell you guys that i'm not always like this but i had a gut feeling okay i turned into a stalker yesterday and i i don't know if there are any people that do this to any of the parents or maybe spouses that do this so luke uh who is our youngest is 16 years old and now has his driver's license and he you know is really good about he'll say um hey mom and dad do you guys mind if I go and he'll like tell us where he's going like he'll say hey do you guys mind if I go and just go get a coke at you know McDonald's and he'll go get a coke at McDonald's and he'll come back and he's got a coke well last night he said hey mom and dad do you guys mind if I go meet a couple of guys we're gonna go hit golf balls well I had a gut feeling that something was going on and my gut feeling was who's hitting golf balls there you go Luke who's hitting golf balls when it's cold outside I mean it was so cold so I sat on the couch next to Chelsea and we were watching you know the TV we had uh we were watching that uh impeachment show catching up on that so good and I'm looking at the GPS tracker thing that we have that Luke knows that we have that we can actually see where where he is at time and I'm following it thinking I'm going to get you know okay he's not there he's you know somewhere who knows

And sure enough, he's at Carl's Golf Land hitting golf balls. And Chelsea goes, don't you feel like the stalker doing what you're doing? Because Chelsea trusted him right from the get-go. And I didn't because I thought there was a little bit suspicious. You know what I mean? Like how cold it was outside. I'm thinking he's not going to do this. But I want to know if there are any listeners of ours that follow somebody on a GPS thing and actually caught them doing something because I want to hear your story because I was so thinking I was going to catch him yeah somewhere completely different yeah you know and I thought okay what

do I then what do I do you know like then then you said he knows that you guys do that so you could have well Tim and said where the heck are you told me you were going to be one place and

now you're another yeah so Chelsea and I got into this little thing where Chelsea's like you she's like i she goes i know you're being a protective parent and stuff like that and i think that that's good but i you know i felt like i know what luke's doing luke's good about this whole thing like he does and i'm like i know but i'm gonna catch him i was kind of disappointed that you

didn't catch him the one time i checked in on my older daughter and she was out with her boyfriend and i forget where they said they were gonna go but the time didn't match up and i thought let me just look into it and the app showed them like behind the high school actually behind the strip mall next to the high school and i'm like hmm did they just park over you know behind the strip mall and they're just hanging out behind the cvs doing things they shouldn't be doing and i'm going crazy now thinking about this well they were home 10 seconds later like the app was wrong oh the app is never froze yeah like froze or something when they were driving home from the practice at the high school so it was totally wrong so i'm like that was my first and last experience tracking i'm like i'm not looking at this anymore it's gonna drive me crazy if i start worrying about where they are all the time because it's not accurate but their mother always does that their mother's always tracking them so then i feel like i don't need to i mean let me know if i need to

put out a search party i but here's the thing i it was i don't always track them but i i had the i had the gut feeling and my gut was wrong and i'll admit that my gut was uh yeah god was wrong

once in a while make sure they're not you know this newfound freedom of a driver's license in of cars obviously you want to make sure he's being responsible it's funny as a kid i would be like

what an evasion of privacy how dare you and as an adult i'm like yep do it go ahead the other day

by the way he went to five guys with his buddies after school and i was very jealous he was that

five guys um ashley hi guys so my mom does this she'll like track my location now we all have iphones in my family so i work in pontiac at a mortgage company and she knows what time i get off so she'll track my location and she'll call me if i'm not like close to being home in a time

frame really so she actually is looking that close at it how old are you i'm 26 oh okay so you're so that you're in you're on the older end but you still live under her roof right

her roof yeah i love under my mom well i have a son and she watches my son while i'm at work so if i'm not home by like 6 30 she's calling me she's like where are you now if you guys live in michigan michigan has all that construction going on and it takes me like 45 minutes to get home

so see my mom would never have taken that excuse she would have been like you know that plan better

leave earlier yeah she was like she's like take a different way home every way yeah home it takes

45 minutes yeah what's up caitlin hi hey caitlin we're talking about gps uh tracking your kids

what do you what does your mom do so we all use my little sister has type 1 diabetes so we all use this app called life 360 well for her 18th birthday i had been planning this surprise party for her and then covet hit so then we had to divert to doing something completely different We get to the park where we're doing it outside so we can all social distance and everything. And then my mom forgets to turn off her location on the app. So my sister went on there and figured everything out.

Oh, no. So these things can ruin surprises.

Yep. I was so mad. I was like, I spent so much time. I kept my mouth shut. I made sure everyone else kept their mouth shut. And then that ruined it.

Funny. Hey, Jake, what did your mom do when you were in high school?

uh good morning um she would she would follow me uh if i told her i was going somewhere like up to the school to play football or down to the store or over to a friend's house or sleepovers or something she would she would drive by this was before the gps tracking and everybody had a phone and stuff but Thank you. So is it embarrassing for you When they're playing with your friends And they're like hey is that your mom

Oh absolutely And they were all terrified of her

That's a good mom though

My mom would come and pick me up In the car She'd come have a talk with them Like you're not going to be speeding with my son You're driving right And they would just make it So it was difficult for me to Hang out with her

But you appreciate it now looking back on it don't you

Oh, now that I'm a parent, I totally see why. You get it. Yeah, I totally see it.

Voice this guy is Tim because he's a sneaky little son of a bitch.

Tim.

Hey, guys. How are you?

Good. What did you do to throw the scent off the dog, so to speak, when your parents were tracking you?

So in high school, I would have a GPS in my car, and then they would also have a tracker on my phone. So what I actually did was I found a way to forward my phone to my friends. So what I would do is I would leave my phone with my car at my work and purposely found a way to stay late at work, which I wasn't, went out, and whenever my parents called me, it went straight to my friends. Now here's the catch. Every single time it rang, I had to pick it up or else the voicemail would have been my friend. Okay, this is, I don't know if it's like super smart or serial killer that you figured that out. But then I got even more sneaky, and then while they were sleeping, I hacked into their phones, put GPS in their phones, and then whenever they were asking where I was, I quickly checked their location and made sure that I was pretty far away. That way, if they wanted to check up with me, they were playing, because we were also 30 minutes away.

All right, so let me ask you this. Wait a minute.

Let me ask you this.

What were you doing that they were checking up on you Were you hanging with guys they didn't like Were you dating someone that they didn't like Were you partying

They were foreign My parents are foreign

Okay so they were just really nervous all the time

Yeah very strict and stuff like that Like I'm almost like turning 27 I don't live at home anymore But if I did I would be getting calls and texts Asking where I am at 8 or 9 o'clock So guys

Imagine this He's 27 years old, and he's asked to be voices, guys, because he still doesn't want his parents to know that he did this when he was younger.

Exactly. But the good thing is, when I have kids, I'll already know all the truth. Yeah, you do.

Wouldn't laugh so hard you'd pee your pants? Listen to the phone scam. It's this morning at 6.50 on Mojo in the Morning. You're home with the phone scams. War of the Roses. And the dirty of the 30s. Mojo in the Morning. This is Mojo in the Morning.

Do we have any teachers listening right now? Will you guys listen up? Spike wants to do a public service announcement as far as Christmas gifts are concerned.

Jeez, I feel like I'm going to get people's Irish up and get them a little mad at me, but it needs to be said. Those horrible popcorn tins are not good gifts. They're not good snacks. Nobody wants them. Oh, I love those. Sorry.

What?

You don't like the popcorn tins?

They're the best.

So you're saying that that's not a good gift for anybody, whether it be a teacher or anybody.

Don't give one to your teacher. Don't give one to your family member hosting dinner this Christmas. Like, no sensible person likes popcorn tins. If somebody tells you they like popcorn tins, they're not to be trusted and they should be avoided at all costs. You mean like with the...

The caramel?

Yeah.

This goes first. Then the cheese. Sometimes I mix the two. The regular popcorn I could do without.

Don't they call it like a Chicago mix or something like that? Yeah.

Well, that's if they're mixed together. if they don't have the partition, the little paper divider in the middle. Either way, they're garbage because there's always a thief in the household who will sneak away in the dead of night to eat all the caramel corn before everyone else wakes up, leaving the world at large to throw away whatever horrible cheddar corn is left in there because nobody wants that. And if you like popcorn, it shouldn't be stored in a tin to get stale and touched by a million random hands for two months. No, just buy regular popcorn. Not a giant 30-gallon tin that everybody... It's even hard to get the stupid lid off, and then you get it off, and popcorn goes flying. I'm surprised by this.

When they send them to us here at the radio station, I'm always so excited.

You know, it's funny because of Shannon. There was one year where we sent it off to all of our Mojo in the Morning clients, and we had it in an iHeart tin and everything. And they all went...

It was like Garrett Popcorner, wasn't it?

Yeah, it was from the Chicago-famed Garrett's Popcorn.

Well, the teacher does not want another tin of popcorn. and they want a gift card to Target. Thank you.

Yeah. This year is going to be an interesting one because a lot of the teachers aren't going to see the kids. So how do you get them the gifts? Is it all virtually? You can send an e-gift card, yeah.

Is that what it is? Mm-hmm.

Because my poor sister, it's funny.

You say the tin. My sister, Pat, was a teacher. She unfortunately had to retire early because she's not well. But she would get more apple crap. And I'm not talking about the computer.

Not the store apple.

She got apples, everything.

Apples on coffee mugs, apples on Christmas ornaments, apples on candles, apples on apples. And you're just like, please, we get it. Teachers, apples, got it.

You know what the problem with Pat is? Pat's a hoarder And Pat hoards this So my sister just went over there Tracy went over to go clean Pat's place out And she's like Pat What in the world You got everything in the world that's an apple here And she goes well my kids I don't want to throw it away

I bet you they sell popcorn tins with apples and teachers on the side

And then the other thing that she would do too Is my sister Pat would get all You know how kids would make Like you do for your grandparent or your mom or whatever They would make gifts with their pictures and stuff My sister Pat couldn't throw pictures away So my sister's cleaning out Pat's place and goes, who's this kid? This isn't one of, like, our, you know, family members. And she goes, oh, that's Davey. I taught him in, you know, 2007. I'm like, she would keep all of that stuff.

I mean, she's such a teacher at heart that she has to hang on to that. I love it.

My sister Tracy goes, I don't think his mom even has this picture. You should call Davey's mom up and give it to him. What's up, Cindy? What do you think about Spike not liking the popcorn tins?

Oh, he's a popcorn snob. I love the tints. I love that. I'm a preschool teacher. I love popcorn tints. I share them with my family. We have a movie night. They're perfect.

See, I'll eat the, I get microwave popcorn. I get the bag of Costco mix Chicago style popcorn. But that stuff, like you can go through it in a week and be done. Or in the case of microwave popcorn, you're eating it that night with a movie and it's done. Not the popcorn tin that's going to sit in my house for a month and a half.

Well, mine came in a bag. It was a Christmas bag, and it had all the different flavors individually wrapped, so they wouldn't go stale. You could just pick your flavor to share for the night.

Okay, all right. You're a snob, Spike. You're a popcorn snob. So as a preschool teacher, is she going to pick the popcorn tin or Target gift card?

Oh, I think that we know the answer to that one. What's up, Michelle?

Hey, as a teacher, please, no candles. No. No scented soap.

Nothing like that.

I forgot about the scented soap. That's even worse than the candles.

So you guys know my friend Chrissy, who is now a retired teacher, but she was a teacher at one of the private schools in the area, and every Christmas time she would always send me a picture of some of the gifts, the better gifts she got. And a couple of years ago, she got soaps, but they were in the shape of little hands. Flesh colored. What do you do with those?

What's wrong with candles?

We always do this as a topic.

You have a personal scent. Like, you like your own scent.

And everybody thinks that you would like their scent. I see that. I love candles, but I like to pick out my own scents. But you should like the scents that I like.

We always do this as a topic later in the year And I know we'll do it probably Towards Christmas time

But this is good to do on Cyber Monday

No, but inappropriate gifts Michelle, the teacher, did you ever get anything inappropriate? Did you ever get a candle from Lover's Lane?

No I was lucky, I taught little kids So they were pretty I teach younger kids

No, but here's the thing It was always the dads that would, or the moms that would get some gift that was sent to them by somebody else.

The Victoria's Secret gift card is always one that I'm like, oof, not for a teacher. Yeah, no, no. I was lucky enough to avoid those.

As you go through the holiday season, just remember that the word stressed is just dessert spelled backward. Now overindulge at that Christmas party. This reminder from Mojo in the Morning.

Word of warning right now, word of warning. The Porch Pirates are out in full effect It's the Mojo in the Morning show You guys getting a lot of packages That are delivered to your house So got a Email sent to our house From our neighbors Asking us And all the other neighbors If you If you have one of those ring cams Which we do by the way We have a ring cam If you can widen the scope of your ring cam For the next few weeks so here's what they asked to do and I think it's kind of like our local police department that's asking this too they are telling you that if you have any kind of like the cameras out in front that you can widen the area a little bit so that it's not just covering like your front doorstep but it could actually

be covering like your neighbors because they want to try to see if they can kind of catch who the people are that are going through the neighborhood and stealing packages off of the porches. Super smart. Has any listeners ever been recently nabbed by a porch pirate? Have you had anybody that, you know, took some of the stuff? And oh, here's a question. Who's the craziest person you caught porch pirating? Because I've heard stories before that neighbors are porch pirating off of neighbors' front doorsteps.

It still blows my mind that people do this. I mean, I feel like so many people have a camera of some sort now. Like, you're going to get caught.

Well, and it's wild because if you hear the stories about sometimes the actual delivery drivers are the ones that are taking the items from, you know, the front porch. And I don't want to put anybody in this category, but if you had, say, a UPS delivery earlier, and then a person comes from another delivery service, and they come and take the delivered item from the UPS people, you know what I mean? They'll steal that item. And I've heard a couple of times, actually, there was a story that was just recently out about an Amazon driver that was notorious for doing this. 844-MOJO-LIVE, 844-665-6548. Hi, Mojo in the morning. Hello.

Hi. Hey, I was calling about the porch pirating.

Yeah. Are you guys getting these in your neighborhood?

Actually, I'm a FedEx driver.

And so you guys have had this happen, huh, where you've witnessed people doing this?

Yeah, I've actually watched people in an SUV just falling behind me to, like, half my route and then stopping after I leave to pick up the packages.

So do you call the police in that situation, I hope?

uh i called my manager first okay and basically he told me to go back and talk to some of the people uh and they could file a police report but i was unable to uh due to my manager's kind of

like discretion you know you guys have obviously a job to do right your job is to deliver the the packages the problem though is it will reflect bad upon in your case fedex or whatever the other delivery services because people are going to assume that they did not get it the delivery if somebody's coming in and stealing this thing and the sad the sad part is that these people are so brazen and they're getting away with it because the services are just sending you new packages instead of prosecuting these these people that are are stealing off of people's

front porges yeah exactly like we fell in line with amazon on being able to like take pictures of our stuff yes uh and that's what we end up doing is we mark it to wherever we're dropping it take a picture of it so if it's up the front door we'll take a picture of the front door with the package there uh so that way there's no kind of arguing that didn't happen most people have

green cams as well yeah have you heard have you heard of people that have now in front of their homes i've heard of this where they'll have this item which is like a big box that you cannot move you put the package inside there and the only person that can actually access that thing is the delivery driver or the people that own the home it's basically something to protect have you

have you had that at all in any of the front stoops yeah i deliver to a couple of law offices as well and they have those um have you seen about that i don't i've never heard of that before so

so it's basically you're delivering to a lockbox okay yeah like some amazon drivers right can have a code that can get you into somebody's garage your garage yeah yeah which yeah a lot of people

sometimes fear giving that code to the amazon driver but it's almost safer giving them your code to your garage because it's not the actual code it's a special code just for them to be able to open it for that one time right and then they can be you know monitored yeah i think that's what

i have in my garage i've never used it because i don't i i don't know how to use it and i've never had to use it but it's like the my q app or whatever yes i have that too i i just don't

have it set up for amazon yeah so they can just walk up and it opens your garage automatically yeah they push i think they just push a button and it goes right there they have a thing a way

to do it like uh through that app michael what's up hey how's it going mojo going okay what's going Hey, so, no, I just talked about porch pirates, and it resonated. So about just over a year ago, we actually lost our daughter. And so people were sending stuff to the house, you know, unexpectedly, randomly. And somebody sent a gift basket, and a neighbor saw somebody nab it off our porch. Oh, my God. Yeah, guilt moment for any porch pirates out there. just uh you never know what uh you know it's not always just a you know a tech toy or something that somebody sends to the house yeah yeah i'm so sorry about your daughter

are you holding up okay yeah we're you know we're hanging in there we actually we just had uh a son um about a month ago just over a month ago so we're you know we're hanging in there and um i mean it's been a tough journey but um but no it just it resonated for a second and i don't know i hope people think twice before they you know thank you for thank you for calling buddy i

appreciate you i've been thinking about you what's up felipe hey how's it going good what's

happening felipe nothing but you were talking about this metal box on porches yes do you have one yes i have one um last winter we were porch pirated we saw it on our google uh doorbell and so um we decided my wife she's very amazon type of ordering person so we found one of those metal boxes on amazon and uh basically you get you get a passcode Whenever you order stuff, you put it in the notes and FedEx or UPS just opens the box on your porch and everything's safe. So what if what you ordered is too big for the box? I'm sorry, what was that? What if what you get is bigger than the box?

You would think of that, wouldn't you?

Well, I'm just saying. We have had that happen before.

You know what she's talking about, if you know what I mean. I'm fine.

well i don't know typically they put it to the side of the house or they just put it behind the box so it's it's in that box is like metal and heavy yeah yeah so so they typically try to put it behind the box or i just try to get there before anybody else does your box would be fine

jannon don't worry what's going on how you doing michaela yeah how are you doing today good what's

up so we actually got porch pirated twice and both were wedding gifts our first one was while we were at our bridal shower and we saw them take it off our porch and we reported it to amazon and everything but they weren't able to do anything because someone else bought it for us but luckily when we got home we went in our backyard and they had like opened it and left it laying out because they realized they couldn't use it so they just kind of left it there so luckily we were able to recovered that but the second time we had a another wedding gift get dropped off and it was a great mural box and it had just been dropped off for i kid you not like maybe five minutes and my husband went down to get it and he saw one of our neighbors walking away with it and

it's a daily basis walk by our house your own neighbor was stealing from you guys so did he

bust him yeah so yeah he ran out and like yelled at him and was like hey like that's ours that's not yours, that's a wedding gift, put that down, and he, like, put it down and then just walked away

and didn't say anything.

Un-freaking-real. Your own neighbor stealing off your front porch.

Yeah, it was quite interesting to hear that one because it was, like, five minutes after it got delivered. Wow.

Crazy. What's up? How you doing, Carolyn?

I'm good.

How are you?

We're doing okay. Be careful and beware of porch pirates. We're talking about that this morning. It's Mojo in the Morning.

Yes, I know. Mine's actually interesting. so it's not really from the front porch it's more of our back porch more or less our garage so let me take you a quick picture my house is at the very end of like this really private mini subdivision type thing and our like our driveway goes wraps around the back of our house so it's pretty hidden it's not like an obvious thing well we had an amazon driver actually just like a week ago drive down our garage go into like or down to our backyard to the garage she got out of her truck she noticed there was a package it was a package from my mom and i to my dad and she opened the package she took it with her she took two of my like christmas tree mini christmas trees that i made for a couple of our neighbors and then proceeded to back up hit my car because it was sitting in our backyard and then drive over our entire back lawn holy crap

so they they're not even good pyre porch pirates aren't they supposed to do this without doing all

that damage and we have a ring camera too so we saw the whole thing oh my gosh what a tummy awful

people well nobody said the porch pirates were smart right right amazing you know i love the delivery driver that we have we have a delivery driver that's really good about hiding the packages the only problem is i don't necessarily know where the hiding spots are so if chelsea's not home chelsea has to like walk me through where the the drivers will hide stuff but they're really good like they'll hide them in trees and things like that the only problem is you got to make sure you get them before a snowfall it gets crazy merry christmas happy hanukkah happy holidays

whatever the hell i'm supposed to say have a good day this is mojo in the morning

mojo in the morning show you're getting two phone scams for the price of one

One, one, one. We're going to go out phone scam both managers of a store in the mall. The store just got a new district manager, and it's perfect timing for a phone scam because the managers haven't met their new boss yet. Ta-da. It's me. Spike is going to be that new boss, calling up and pretending with them that there's some new rules that are going to be in play for the holidays. He's going to tell them that they have to wear an elf costume this holiday season in the store.

We will, we will scam you. Sorry, it's a catchy song.

It's your home of phone scams. Mojo in the morning.

Hello. How can I help you?

Hi, Jessica. This is Oliver from Corporate. How are you?

I'm great. How are you doing, Oliver?

Is Scott here as well? Is he on the call?

Let me grab him for you. Scott, can you pick up line two?

Hello. Hi, Scott. Hi, Jessica. This is Oliver. Nice to finally meet you guys.

Yeah, wonderful to meet you.

Looking forward to a market visit really soon so I can get to know everyone, but just want to fill you guys in on the new holiday promotion because it may take some staffing adjustment, and I want to get you guys lead time to inform the staff and make sure there's no issues with covering each shift. Which one of you guys wants to take the lead on the task of tracking down costumes?

I'd be happy to do that.

Okay. And how many associates do you have? We have seven. All right, take some notes. Here's what we're going to do. Basically, the promotion is called the Elf on the Shelf. Are you guys familiar with the concept of Elf on the Shelf?

No, not.

An elf comes to visit from the North Pole, and they keep watch over the kids. They sit in different places around the house every day and report back to Santa whether or not they're being good. But basically, employees will take shifts sitting perfectly still on the counter, posing as an elf on the shelf. So we're going to have our staff being the elf on the shelf, and it's going to get lots of talk. We're hoping with social media this will go viral, and the end result, hopefully, will be that foot traffic will increase because people want to come in and see our live elf on a shelf. You understand?

So you want the actual employees at the store to sit on the shelf?

Just one at each time. The other people, obviously, will be ringing up customers and working on the floor.

Okay. I would love to make just a suggestion. I think that's great. I just wonder if maybe we could hire a temp, you know, maybe like a high school kid or something, only because, you know, we do have, like, Louise, who, you know, she's 56 years old, and I don't know that, you know, she'd be comfortable to sit on the shelf.

She's too old to sit?

well for a long duration of time i mean anyone can wear candy cane tights and sit on their ass

for six hours right i want our staff into the spirit of the promotion and i think they'll like it because they don't have to restock or they don't even have to talk to customers they're supposed to sit perfectly still and not move uh one more question um should we make jill do it

Jewish, you know, and you know, I'm just not sure we can really make

her do that. Oh, Lord. The elf isn't a religious character. I mean, it's elf on a shelf. All right, grab a pen. I want you guys to write down these elf names. Everybody needs to change their store name tag and have an elf name on it. So, just write down the first elf will be Twinkle Floppy Feet and the next one is Glitzy McJingles.

Sorry, I'm still writing Twinkle Floppy Feet. One second.

Glitchy McJingles.

Yep. And number three is Squeezy Festive Fingers. Number four is Perky Pickle Pants. Perky Pickle Pants. And you understand the reason they have, the employees have to choose from one of these names just because they had to be cleared for trademark clearance, make sure nobody's using them. We don't, you know, get sued by anybody. The next one's Cookie Glitter Balls. And then the last one's Senor Stampy Ding Dong. Any other questions so far?

Will we be selling the elf-on-the-shelf toy and books?

No. And you guys are going to need costumes, too, by the way. Jessica, you will be dressing like Elsa or Anna, you know, the princesses from Frozen. And then, Scott, you will either be a snowman or a reindeer. Your choice.

A snowman or a reindeer. Actually, I wouldn't mind being Santa.

You're not allowed to be Santa. Too much pushback from mall management. Obviously, they got their own thing going on.

So, are all of us going to be in costume all the time, or...

Guys, why do you hate Christmas?

I mean, I'm the manager, and I just really want the customers and my own staff to take me seriously.

Stop with the Grinch bull**** and get on board, guys, or else I'm going to have to inform you that you've just been the victim of a mojo on the morning phone scam.

Oh, my...

My God, you're kidding me. I don't get it.

Your entire staff just set you guys up.

That was the worst idea ever. Wow! We will, we will scam you. We interrupt this message to tell you that was funny. It's the home of the world-famous phone scams. You're listening to Mojo in the Morning.

It's Mojo in the Morning. show. I hope that you guys are doing well. We've got a lot of stuff coming up for the holidays, including a break-and-entering Christmas wish on the way this morning, and then some good holiday gifts.

I hope I survive all of it. I hope I'm here and ready to watch all of it because I nearly had a damn heart attack this morning. Really? What happened? Did you know that Amazon does overnight deliveries 4 to 8 a.m.? Oh, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah. I've had, I've woken up to stuff on my front porch.

I didn't. I didn't know that. why what happened to you i i mean i opened my garage door to go to work and a guy is standing there and he almost got pepper sprayed because i literally i like i was like what are you doing who are you what are you doing and he's like he held his hands up and he held the the box the little package he's yelling amazon delivery i have your cheddar broccoli rice and i'm like you know i had no idea i uh almost attacked an amazon delivery guy so he says no you checked overnight delivery i said i don't i didn't even know that existed yeah so i just went back and looked at

the is that your your angry uh thing that you just did no that's it did you really say that

or did you go i just crapped my pants that too that too but i have a pepper spray thing on my keychain i almost oh really sprayed the guy because spike you're gonna mess up your blood pressure acting crazy i get up and go to work every morning and when i leave my garage i don't expect another human to be standing there and he was right there at my car so i thought oh my god

somebody's there to attack me or something it's crazy how they do that by the way who signs up for this shift will you call us up if you're the 4 a.m delivery person is somebody who has it as

like a second or third job really the money and that's the time and the time they have free in

their day and somebody needs to explain this to me the people that sign up for that shift do you worry about your safety because there's i i can only imagine that you probably get faced with exactly what just happened with spike yeah where somebody's going to come out and thank god

you only have a pepper stray there nothing good happens at 4 a.m so if you're doing that shift where you're out driving delivering at 4 a.m and going up to people's doors there's got to be people that forget like i did or didn't know a package is coming they think you're an intruder neighbor sees you and thinks you're a prowler i had no idea they did that and he said apparently a lot of people do it for their groceries they can like get all their stuff in the door wait they actually

do groceries at that time yeah i didn't know that and that's what i was getting i was just i i mean

i was getting as a gag gift i was getting a last minute stocking stuffer for my daughter it's all she eats is this cheddar broccoli rice it's instant mix and i thought i'll be funny to put a box of it in her in her uh stocking and i'm like i no idea that they would deliver overnight because i wouldn't choose that i don't want to well you know i've done it before i've chose that

for the show for stuff that we needed for the show you'd never done that before no because i

don't charge it doesn't cost you no i know that but i'm here starting early in the morning so that stuff would be sitting there all day while i'm at work oh but but see that exactly what

happen to you, it comes pretty much before we even...

If it comes in the first hour, I'm good. But 4 to 8 a.m. normally won't work for me because it'll be there for 10 hours.

My problem is we have a ring cam on our front door, a ring doorbell cam, and it's motion detected. And if I don't turn my phone on mute in the middle of the night, I get awoken or awaken. Something, one of those words. You woke up? Yeah, I woke up. And then that freaks you out Because in the middle of the night thing You're thinking, uh oh, what's going on Is somebody coming to rob me Or is my child sneaking out of the house To go out and party with his friends

I guarantee you 90% of the stuff we're doing We don't need it 4 o'clock in the morning

It's pretty nuts These guys A texter here says That they had the same thing happen to them Got scared the pants off of them When somebody actually did that, they came up to their house in the middle of the night. Another one, 248 says, that same thing happened to me yesterday morning. I turned around and I could see a light through my window in the front door opened, opened it up and the Amazon guy scared the crap out of me. Do the Amazon guys and gals, do they?

I just can't believe I said gals. Do they...

Their vehicles look like

they're better than the vehicles of the... than some of the other delivery services. When you say...

I'm saying the unmarked ones scare me because I'm like, who the heck is this? Yeah, they say U-Haul or something like that. And what that person said, how they open the door. Sometimes I do love if it's raining or something, they'll put my package in between the storm door and the door. It would sound like

somebody's breaking in because they're opening the door yeah no that's interesting that's uh that's wild well you know i don't know if you guys have had uh any deliveries that you've been trying to get like before the holidays all the delivery services are faced with really difficult tasks right now like you talk about you know you hear the supply chain thing it's not supply chain it's delivery chain yeah so in the worst one that has been happening lately has been fedex Supposedly FedEx has been having some of the – they have had to reimburse people on overnights and two days and all the rest of that stuff because they can't guarantee that they're going to get it. They used to be so good. I remember one time when FedEx said that they would do same-day delivery, and I remember we were going to use it because we had to get something to one of the show members who was in Chicago. And it was cheaper to same-day deliver it there than it would have been for us to get in a car and drive it.

Right.

Because those guys were able to do it now that they can't fulfill it. But what's going on, Kayla? Hi. Hey, what's happening?

So it's actually called Amazon Flex, and people volunteer with their own cars and deliver packages.

Yeah.

And that's what freaked me out. It was just a minivan.

Yeah.

My boyfriend does it.

Really?

Yeah, he does it as a second job.

Does he do it in the middle of the night?

His earliest one was 345 in the morning.

Oh, my goodness. And is he part-time with Amazon? Yeah. It smells to me like it's another way for them to save money. Like they're going to hire people to use your own vehicle part-time, no full-time and benefits, and then also no depreciation on vehicles.

It's like DoorDash, though. Yeah. Listen, we all come down on it, but I'm sure your boyfriend's making money, right?

Well, the early morning shifts are the most money.

Yeah, so he's getting paid. So he's not doing it because he wants to do it. He's doing it because it's actually good pay?

It's decent. It's like $120 for like four hours.

Okay. It's better than sitting at home and hanging out in bed and making nothing. Unless you're going to do some stuff with him in bed, and then I would give up the $120. Will you do that?

Oh, Mojo.

All right. Tell him I'm supporting him on this one. That's called Girlfriend Flex. Felicia, what's happening? Hey, how are you? You do the Amazon Flex?

Actually, yes, I do it with my husband.

Really? And do you ever get people that are freaked out when you walk on their doorstep in the middle of the night?

Actually, it's the neighbors The neighbors are freaked out

Yeah, because we do so much news stories About these porch pirates Imagine you're putting it on the porch But people think you're taking it off the porch

Exactly, exactly Especially when we're in our own vehicle

What exactly are they having delivered? Because Spike was having What was it again?

Cheddar broccoli rice

Nothing important What are other people having delivered, Felicia?

A lot of the packages There's mainly Christmas gifts, rice, well, I guess rice and water and dog food and cat food and cat litter.

Stuff that you realize you need by the next morning.

Exactly.

Very nice. All right. Well, thank you for the call.

No problem. Thank you. Bye, Felicia.

What's going on, Shanice? Yes. Hi, what's happening?

Hi, not much. I'm at work right now, actually.

You are? Oh, so are you an Amazon person?

Yes, I am. I deliver the XL packages, which are like the big and bulky things like refrigerators, treadmills, and stuff like that.

Did you say treadmills? Yeah. Really? You do it all by yourself? That sounds like a big job.

I'm a helper, and with a driver, normally there are two people, and we have a dolly and a lift gate.

Who has a treadmill delivered to them at 4 a.m.?

Someone who wants to work out at 6 a.m. There's actually a lot of people Who schedule treadmills to be delivered Between 6 and 9 o'clock in the morning

Wow And I bet you that they have it delivered So they can hang their clothes from it Because they're probably never using the thing

Exactly

God, that's wild That's a weird thing to have delivered that early in the morning Hi, Tina

Hi

What's up? Oh, nothing much. I'm delivering for Amazon Flex right now.

You are?

Yes.

And what are you delivering? You got anything good in that car of yours?

Right now, I'm just doing the Whole Foods packages, but usually I'll go back and forth between Amazon packages and Whole Foods, but today's Whole Foods.

Oh, okay. I forgot about the Whole Foods Amazon thing, that they do that.

I think that's what mine was technically under.

Was it really? Yeah. So it comes over. That's interesting. Do they have people at Whole Foods in the middle of the night packing it, or do they pack it like yesterday?

No, it's all from the Amazon warehouse.

Oh, it's in the warehouse, so it's not actually at Whole Foods.

Yeah, they're just using the brand name.

Oh, I always thought that Whole Foods, when you ordered the Whole Foods thing, it came from the Whole Foods by your house.

Not always. Amazon also has the Whole Foods delivery service.

Oh, wow, okay. You do go to the store, though, sometimes?

Yes, we do go to the store. I may have people coming in early. That's expensive now. It used to be free. Is it really? Now it's $9.99.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah.

It's still like an Instacart type thing? It's just expensive. Whole Foods is kind of expensive, though, isn't it? Yeah. I'd like to have a head of lettuce. Do they still have heads of lettuce, or do they just come all in bags now? They do. I'd like a head of lettuce, please, delivered to my house.

It cost you $20 from Whole Foods.

I'd like a bag of carrots. I'm going to build a snowman, and I need a nose. I love the –

But what have we become as a society that, like, it's 2021. we can literally be making something go oh i need a clove of cinnamon i'll just call and have it delivered right now in an hour at four in the morning and we're like oh they want to charge us

9.99 for that service do we have apps that we have apps that if you want a blow job right now you all you do is swipe right on the thing and you got it what are you talking about i'm saying

like yeah i mean but our white privilege that we're like we like we're shocked it's nine dollars that they're gonna completely deliver this one little item to our house in an hour i understand It's a convenience. I'm just saying it used to be free.

That's why I'm shocked.

A BJ used to be free?

No, a Whole Foods delivery.

Oh, okay. I was wondering about that. Everything is instantaneous in this world nowadays. Nobody works for anything anymore. It's crazy. Just want it on your doorstep? You got it on your doorstep. Tomorrow, by the way, I'm sending Spike. I'm going to send Spike somebody to your doorstep, Spike. Could you imagine you walk outside? The Kool-Aid lady's there with her keyboard.

Spike, did they take a picture and email it to me and say, how was your delivery, like they do with everything else?

This is way hitting the boogal boogal.

Laugh at Spike's phone scam to help forget about the annoying people you'll see today. This morning is 7.50 on Mojo in the Morning. Your home of the phone scams. War of the Roses. And the dirty on the 30. Mojo in the Morning. This is Mojo in the Morning.

It's Mojo in the Morning. it's good to have you guys listening to the mojo in the morning show mojo spike shannon megan mike kpr executive producer reese our director of social impact lydia our associate producer and of course the great work of katie doing all the audio work here for the show it's good to have you guys here with us today i love shannon you got to tell when you tell this story you got to tell it like you told us in our pre-show meeting this morning because you were so descriptive in the pre-show meeting that for some reason, I felt like I was in the movie at that particular

time. You know, there are moments in your life that just feel like a movie, and that was me yesterday. I felt like my house was being cased by the wet bandits. The wet bandits. From Home Alone. Yes. Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern. Is that right, Daniel Stern? Mm-hmm. Is that? Wow. That is

unbelievable. Look at you. You're like, Like, I'm going to play Trivial Pursuit with you.

I don't think I've played that game ever. Okay, so these two guys, I was home yesterday afternoon. I was just with Smith. Lucy hadn't gotten off the bus yet. And these two guys came to my door wearing yellow construction vests. And so Smith's like, Mom, someone's at the door. And he knows not to answer the door because, you know, stranger danger. So I went to answer my door, and they were just so cheerful and smiley. And they claimed to be from a construction company that was contracted by DTE to replace the pole in my backyard. I have like randomly a big pole, unfortunately, in my backyard that a lot of the wires are connected to. And I lost my power a ton this summer. So they're like, it's just preventative, ma'am. They said ma'am so many times. Just preventative, ma'am. You know, we'll get it done in one day, ma'am. No worries. Well, they were so overly nice. And that's what got me suspicious. but they had me walk around the exterior of my exterior of my house with them they asked me for my schedule do you work from home what days do you go into the office and the reason why the reason ma'am that we're asking is because you're you're not going to have power for an

entire day while we reconfigure this pole and we just want to make sure we're not interfering with your schedule, ma'am. I mean, the whole thing. And so they asked me, I just got this weird gut feeling. I'd been talking to them for like 15, 20 minutes. Ma'am, we're going to have to remove some of your landscaping and we're going to bring a big truck through here with the pole. I swear after I got done talking to them, I thought, okay, either I just got had because these guys were way too nice. And they weren't wearing anything that said DTE or any other company on it. They just had yellow construction vests on. But I swear when the one guy smiled as he left, he had a gold tooth that sparkled, just like Joe Pesci. Just like Marv. Just like Marv. I swear. And they walked away and I walked back into my house and I closed the door. I'm like, am I dumb?

Am I dumb? You just gave the wet bandits all the information they need. Were they, were you, do you think they were going to rob you or do you think you were just mad because they said ma'am so many

times but i don't know no i i really was like i didn't see any they didn't give me any information he had me write down my name and phone number and address on a piece of paper and i'm like i

i can call pat kuda by the way from dte and have her well it's too late the guy knows my

whole guy you gave it to him jesus well did dte like um go through first and and email you and give you notice that they were going to be sending a crew out or well there has been there have been

crews like around my neighborhood i've noticed repairing stuff so i'm really hoping that these guys didn't just notice that and say like we we'll get this one yeah it looks dumb dress dresses the

mechanics or the workmen and no one will ever suspect do you do you stop for the people that

hold clipboards at malls all the time and like will ask questions well i feel kind of bad just You're doing a random survey right now. You do that thing? Do you sign every political petition? Or do you get those text messages sent to your phone that says your package is going to be delivered, but you've got to click right here?

But they were so nice. They were so nice. They were so nice. Kevin! Did they ask for your social security number? No.

Shannon is often a sucker, though. Remember, she just handed money over to some little kid saying he was selling firewood.

I got my wood, though.

Yeah, but like eight months later. You didn't know anything about the kid at the time. Augustus Gloop.

He was Augustus Gloop from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. They all come to my port.

Hope, you're on with Shannon, Hope.

Hi, Shannon, you are killing me. Why would you ever talk to anybody that did not have a showing badge, first of all?

Continue. I'm just getting berated. Just go.

I mean, we love you, dear. You're pretty. You're small. You're alone.

you know what though at this point right now this is this is where shannon honestly you need to like call one of us like seriously just call somebody else just jump on real quick and just say all

right quick he was very concerned about my ruining my landscape he seems just so nice by the way you

i feel so bad for you because they rip up your lawn more than any other place in the world i

told i told this guy and i really do think that they were legit but i told this guy he's like i I think, you know, we're going to have to go over all your brick pavers back here. I'm like, they literally just finished these three weeks ago. Please don't.

By the way, is this music not the most perfect thing ever? I'm picturing Shannon right now walking through the town with her little winter coat on and that stocking hat.

By the way, screw the person that just texted R.I.P. Shannon. Did you go, and this is where I sleep?

Right.

This is my son right here.

By the way, next time, just let Smith answer the question. For a birth certificate.

Shannon's the reason, like, she'll click the bait email saying, like, oh, there's something wrong with your target account. You just did it.

No, I didn't. With the time off. No, I didn't do it.

That was Mike.

That was Mike. That was Mike. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. This year, I'm asking Santa for a big, fat bank account and a slim body.

all right so we have a new member of our show actually he's not so new he's coming up on being with the show for a year reese who is our director of social impact he takes care of all the videos that you see every single day and our social media and this guy's like all-around hardest working guy that we've ever had here and we love him so much but maybe his family doesn't

as much as we do well my dad definitely doesn't that's for sure so i hear you talk about your dad i don't really have a great relationship with him i haven't talked to him in probably like three years maybe even four years how old were you when your parents got divorced um i

think i was 14 okay yeah so yeah it was around here um he lives in brighton okay i was surprised when you had covid that i said to you you know that you're you know your mom and dad check check in and you said my mom just was unbelievable totally took care of you but dad never even

checked in didn't he i don't even know if he knew i had covid wow does your dad know you work on the show i have no idea honestly wow three years i'm sure he has an idea because my sister is always

with him but can i adopt you and you be my child i would love to have you that's why i'm always like i'm down all right cool so the favorite child at christmas time you're obviously not the favorite

child no my sister is though and the last time i went to my dad's for christmas i basically walked in i looked at the fireplace with all these stockings on it and i realized i was the only one who didn't have a stocking what yes and he knew you were coming yeah well he claims he didn't know i was coming doesn't matter you still put it up either way you should always have a stocking

for your kid wow so so that was only part how did christmas bring out that you knew that you were not the favorite child um that's pretty crazy uh that that that happened how many kids

does your dad have he's got you and your sister and then yeah and then a step a step sister too

so he so he had your step sister your biological sister and the dog even the dog

Him and my stepmom have this French bulldog they're obsessed with, and the dog even had a stocking.

Oh, my God. Yep. That is unbelievable, Reese. That's horrible. You know what? Just for that, somebody call Chelsea and tell her we've got to buy another stocking and put Reese up there. It's spelled R-H-Y-S, though. Okay? That's how he spells his name.

On the bright side, my stepmom doesn't do the best stockings. She's one of those who does a toothbrush and an apple and a, you know. Oh, that's what she puts it on here.

That's super exciting. Oh, yeah. All right. So you're okay with that, haven't you? Yeah. They got blank, and all I got was blank. Call us up, and let's talk about how you feel like you're the bastard child, the one that gets the hand-me-downs, so to speak.

Oh, it gets better, too, though. What happened? So as we're opening presents, my sister opens this brand-new $500 camera, and she's not even a camera kind of person. She is really not technically inclined whatsoever, whereas everyone knows I love making videos and I do all that stuff for social media.

That's your job.

So basically she gets this fancy camera and I got my license plate tabs. How much were your license plate tabs, though? They could be expensive. Honestly, I did kind of appreciate it because it's always a pain. Yeah, so I can't complain too much, but, you know.

We all are going to group hug Reese later after this show is over with. I know it's all bad for this guy. And if his dad is listening, his name is spelled R-H-Y-S. Rhys, do you want to come to my house?

I'll make you a stocking. We're all putting stockings up for Rhys. Oh, no, I wasn't going to die. I need someone to record my kids.

What's up, Tim? Hello. How you doing, buddy? How do you know that you're not the favorite child?

I mean, I'm the black sheep of my family, man. I spent 14 years in the Michigan Department of Corrections. I haven't been to my family's house in like 17, 18 years.

Yeah, but do you have a stocking up on the chimney with care in hopes that St. Nicholas soon will be there? Yes, I do. The guy that's been in jail for 14 years has one, but Reese doesn't have one. That's great. I love that. Oh, man. That's crazy. Danielle, what's up?

Hi. Yes. My brother always got Nintendos and Game Boys, and I always got magazines and posters because I was a girl, you know? He always had fun electronics.

Is it because boys always get more love or something like that?

Something like that. It's easier to shop for, apparently. That's what my sisters used to always say in our house.

My sisters always in my house would always say that the boys got everything and the girls got nothing. But, Megan, what's up?

Hey, so my step-grandma, so she gives all her biological kids, like, diamond tennis bracelets. And then for my Christmas present I got a journal from a garage sale That said 50 cents on it

Wow That's awful But it's the thought that counts What's up Tiffany

Hi my brother got a $1000 rifle and a Gaming console I think it was Like a Playstation 3 at the time And I got a pair of socks And a chapstick

Oh, jeez. What kind of chapstick? Was it the candy cane chapstick?

Because that's a really good one. No, it was like the 98 cent, like just generic chapstick.

Yeah, socks are stocking stuffers. But if that's the only thing you got in your stocking, well, they've got a good, you know, $1,000 gift. Amanda, listen to this one. Amanda, you definitely are not one of the favorites.

yeah i um everybody in my family i have uh four other siblings they all got macbooks for christmas and i got a scar now what was the did they give you a reason well the worst part about it is i didn't really know i don't i'm the only one that doesn't live at home i live in winter they all live in london and i went back home and they all pulled all their macbooks and they were all on them And I'm like, where did you guys get those? They're like, oh, our grandma gave them to us for Christmas. And I'm like, I got a scarf.

That's a huge one. But listen to Erin's. This one's funny, too. Erin?

Hey. So my mom moved down to Columbus. And she moved with my brother and sister. So last year, we decided that we were going to have Christmas at my house. So they all drove up here. My mom handed me this big, huge, heavy bag. And I'm like, what is this? And she's laughing. and I legitly pulled out a Meijer brand bag of 10-pound potatoes.

Wait, that's what you got and everybody else got?

My brother and sister sat in my living room and opened up brand new iPhones.

Oh, jeez.

Wait, that's really bad.

She couldn't even get the Idaho brand or like... It was Meijer brand.

Reese, take 30 seconds here right now, and I want you to shout out to the listeners why they should send you a gift for this holiday season. And let's see if any listener will send Reese a gift.

I think the listeners should send me a gift because my dad is an arsehole and I think that I'm a very appreciative guy. So whatever they send me, I'll be very appreciative of. And yeah, I like edibles. I like pretty much anything, so feel free to hook it up.

Where were you when these songs played on the radio?

Everybody get up.

Play along with the throwback throwdown after 8 on Mojo in the Morning.

Hey, have you ever had this where you don't want to tell anybody that you really don't know how to do something, but you kind of like fake your way through it, and then you realize you're about to kill yourself or kill somebody else. Well, that's what happened to Mike. And, Mike, will you explain what you really don't know how to do?

I have no idea, and I keep thinking I'm going to learn it. Like, it'll just naturally come to me, and one day it'll click. I have no idea how to tie things to my car, like, to tie in general. Like, if I have to move something, I don't know how to put straps on. If I have to, like, I went and got a Christmas tree this last weekend. You're supposed to strap it to the roof of your car? Yeah. Not a clue how to do that. That thing slid around my entire roof of my car the entire ride back.

You go through the windows, like through the inside of the car? Sure.

Did you do that?

Yes, but I tied it around the net instead of the actual tree. So then it's like slipping out of the tree. Oh, yeah. It was a disaster.

Oh, God, that could have been really bad.

Do you know that, Mike, that that is actually the cause of many car crashes nowadays? Is it right? Yeah. There's a lot of people, and I don't know if any of our listeners have ever had this happen. Have you guys ever had the tree fall off your car? But it's happened a lot to people where you all of a sudden, Evan, do you notice if you drive down any of the highways here in the metro Detroit area, I always see them on 275. And it's not just trees. For some reason.

It's mattresses. Yeah. It's ladders. It's couch cushions.

You guys know this. Couch cushions. That is one of my very irrational, but it could happen, fears, is to be behind somebody on the highway and whatever is strapped to the top of their car to slide through my window.

It's not irrational. Remember, it happened to me less than a year ago. Some truck in front of me lost its whole load, and I had to swerve to avoid, and there was a car next to me. It was the truck. I think it was a painting crew or something because ladder, buckets, spare tire, everything slid right out of the truck bed. Wow. And I couldn't move out of the way because there was a car next to me on the lodge and we're going 70 miles per hour. So my only choice was to go right over the stuff. And I shredded the bottom of the car. It shredded it. And, I mean, thousands of dollars of damage. And luckily, nobody was hurt. And that truck never stopped. It had to know. It lost everything right out of the back. But when you see a 10-foot aluminum ladder sliding out of the back of your truck and towards my windshield, I couldn't believe nobody got hurt on that thing. but it's not an irrational fear at all. And the problem, a lot of these people just drive on highways without realizing you're going faster, there's more wind resistance. Whatever you think you have secure in the back of your car or on the roof of your car is not going to be secure at 70 miles per hour as it is going down the street at 10 miles per hour.

And what's that movie where the logs fall out of the truck? Final Destiny.

You ever seen Final Destination?

Yeah, a lot of people will not get behind one of those trucks. One of those, yeah, yeah.

But I still have no idea. Knowing this and knowing that it could happen at any time, I have no idea how to tie stuff on. And I am too embarrassed to go, hey, can you help me tie this on?

I'm like you, though, when it comes to that, because I'm not the manliest of men. Come on, you guys are supposed to say amen. Trying to be nice to you, you know. No, I'm not the manliest of men. Thank you, man. I know you might think so. But, um, I fake it too, Mike, because I don't want to look, especially when you go to like one of those Christmas tree lots, or if you go to like the Home Depot, they'll tie it

for you.

The guys at Home Depot have, have numerous times, uh, you know, when I've bought Christmas trees or gone in to ask for something, guys that are wearing the, you know, the orange or even the ladies that, that are, that are there, that are wearing like their orange vest. I will like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know how to do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they must look at it on my face and go, this guy has no fricking clue what he's doing. I'm a sucker. Yeah, I have no clue. I'm like you, Mike.

Well, and then I just chopped down a tree. Like, I just felt like I should be able to know how to do that. You, like, physically chopped it down? Yeah, I took a saw. Like, they give you a saw, your own saw, and you walk back there. How did you know how to do that? Well, it's just like a regular saw. You just chop it at the bottom, I guess. I think, right?

Well, you're not chopping with a saw. You're sawing back and forth, right? Well, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's right.

Chop with an ax or a hatchet.

Well, then I did it wrong.

He's just hacking away with his saw. Shouldn't they have noticed that, by the way? When Mike had no clue? Oh, wait, that's a wrong kind of saw.

They didn't give him an electric saw.

They should have noticed when I showed up in my very clean Sorrento trying to drive back into a field. And while it's a great car, it's not off-road.

Yeah. What kind of saw did they give you? I'm just asking because this is entertaining.

Come on, man. You know I don't know the name of the saw. It was the one with the little prongy things at the bottom, but it was like a round, it had a round top, so I was. A bow song. Yeah, that's what I said.

Hey, what's up, Kendall?

Hi.

Hi. What's going on?

Good morning.

Morning.

I just wanted to tell you guys, when I was like 12 years old, I was sitting at a light right in front of a gas station in White Lake, and a lumber truck flipped right in front of me and my mom. No. Jeez. All the lumber dumped and came right at our car.

Holy crap. I would have literally crapped myself. Wow. I have a fear of car haulers, you know, the ones that go to, like, the dealerships to drop off cars. That one's going to roll off. I always think that, yeah, the one especially that's facing with its front end towards me, that that thing's going to come right at me.

I've always switched labels.

Has that ever happened, by the way? Has anybody ever witnessed that where the cars came off one of those car haulers? That's crazy. And you know what? that's like a movie with the lumber one where all of a sudden you see like the lumber rolling towards you like in slow motion you know yeah yeah well hey let me ask you who do you think is the least manly of men me or mike um probably mike yeah i think so too but i'm gonna say my

ex-boyfriend's probably worse

i agree let's just go with that one right all right so chelsea uh last night was wrapping up a bunch of gifts for the holidays she's been doing such a great job of like not waiting till the very very end and so if you go into and she did it in uh joe's old room um she turned it into her gift wrapping room which is kind of like gift wrapping stuff all the play all over the place and so she said to me she goes hey can you do me a favor she goes can you go grab a couple of the gifts that you know we got for luke and i think luke's by the way uh got a later start today so i can i can mention this because he's he's got finals midterms and stuff like that at school so she said can you get him the uh the golf stuff that you bought um luke is like really into golf right now he's you know like golfing all the time and going to Carl's Golf Land and stuff like that and hitting golf balls. But he's also like into golf clothes. So have you heard of Grayson at all? It's a Detroit-based golf company. It's unbelievable clothing. I actually happened upon it when I was downtown because they opened up in that old John Varvatos store. So now it's their location, their headquarters. And it started by some guy that lives here in our area. But I bought some stuff for Luke way back in September, and I can't remember where the hell I put it. Oh, no. So Chelsea says to me, can you go find it? I can't find it. Has that ever happened to you where you put it away somewhere and you don't know where the hell it is? I was searching everywhere to try to find, and it was like a pair of like sweatpants and like this sweatshirt thing that they had. And then. i went online to go see if i can find it again because if i can't find it i was gonna buy it again and then when i'll eventually find it i'll return it they don't even have it anymore it's

out it's out of stock and gone that's happened to me like three times and all of those times i had to just go out and rebuy the gifts again because i just forgot where and then i find them like eight

months later i'm like now what do i do i i searched everywhere so i figured that i had i put it in my closet and i just recently cleaned my closet so i kind of rearranged some stuff but i think i'm i don't know if i put it there i looked in my car because i always like just throw stuff in the back of my uh my gordon chevrolet tahoe um can't it can't find it there i looked in our basement i'm like not finding it anywhere inside one of the you know the areas in the basement where i like to hide it i don't want to say because luke could be listening right now knowing that he's not going to get some really cool stuff for um i i uh i think i remember this happening when i was a kid to my parents because randomly my birthday was in june randomly like in april my mom or my dad would say you know what we got for you you just because you've been a really good kid we got you and they would give me like whatever the toy was it would be like some play school thing and i go oh my god mom and dad this is the greatest and then i would find out from my sisters later that my mom forgot where the hell she hid it so it came out later and my mom my mom didn't want to give it to me like for my birthday in june to wait that long because she knew she'd forget it again yeah so you get like a random surprise uh 844 mojo live 844-665-6548 have you ever forgotten where you hid the gift and if so um did you find it like eventually in april like it happened with me um mojo in the morning show coming up here in just a little bit we've got a phone scam so stick around holiday edition phone scam so spike's gonna get you something good to listen to and the throwback throwdown is happening this morning and it's the last throwback throwdown of the year So who's going to win this morning's Throwback Throwdown? It's all important. We'll find out. And then we should do a tally, too, to see how everybody did in this year. Lauren. Hi. Good morning. Hi. Did you forget where you hit a gift?

Yeah. So I still have gifts that are lost from last year. I still can't find them. So whenever I do, I guess I'll give them to my husband.

Is it something good?

well it's a few things from amazon but the one thing i don't know it was some tool that i bought from home depot and it's not always a big one it's just like something small i don't know much about them yeah i cannot i can't find these things to save my life doesn't that suck it drives

you crazy because honestly it makes me feel like i'm losing my mind you know yeah it's it's super

annoying but you know what he's gonna be super happy when i find them one day and he has doubled

Oh, dude, I'm going to tell you, as a kid, there was nothing better than when my mom would just show up and give me, like, a random gift. And I thought I was, like, really special until my brother blew it for me. What's up, Madeline?

Hey, so I lost my elf on the shelf. I forgot where I put it. I did the same thing.

So what did you do? Did you call Santa Claus and ask him to send you another elf on the shelf, if you know what I mean?

I called my sister, actually, because I was in a panic. I couldn't find one. They were sold out everywhere.

Oh, jeez. So what did your sister do?

She got online because I was panicking and didn't think to do that and found one. So I'm in Tiffin. So I listen to you guys on 92.5.

Yeah.

And she found one in Finley at a Meijer store. So I had to I'm a single mom So nobody can watch my daughter For me to go and find Elf on the Shelf So I had to Oh I found one I had to stage a pickup At a Meijer store And had to like Tell the Meijer folks Hey put it in a big Triple bag it so my kid Doesn't see it And I found one last minute It was late Santa brought, you know, off on the shelf was late. She came on like December 3rd, but I still don't know where the thing is.

I still have no idea.

You got to hope that your kid doesn't find it.

Mine was missing for two years, and I just found it this year, a couple of weeks ago.

And now you have a stunt. So now we have an extra.

We have an imposter.

We're going to be a fist fight. Lauren, what's up? Hi. Hey, what's happening? You lost a gift?

Actually, it was my cousin, But we had a Christmas party. All of our family was there, 30, 40 people. Waited and had a couple.

cocktails waited later that night when all the kids went to bed we're wrapping presents and we couldn't find her oldest daughter's brand new iphone we searched everywhere we had 40 people over we're in the garage we're going through like 10 different garbage bags for like four or five hours we we just thought it disappeared and the next morning we found it in her younger daughter's closet she had found the stash of presents and decided that she was going to keep the She's a thief

That's what a lot of our text messages are saying They're saying Mojo your son found the gifts Check his closet he's already using them

He's probably been wearing it and I don't even realize that Eric this is a wild one How many years later did you guys Find the gift

My grandma bought me a Optimus Prime Transformer In 1986 And then gave it to me Still wrapped in the package In 2012

Wait, that is, honestly, that is amazing. It's probably worth so much money.

What's even more, yeah, when she passed away a couple years back, I put it on eBay and sold it for $8,000. Oh, my God.

Thank God for Grandma. You would have been playing with it. You wouldn't have had fun. Now you got $8,000 in your pocket. Thank God for Grandma's dementia.

Yes, yes, it was a cool one.

Have a good one. I've seen your Facebook status. You're getting a dictionary for Christmas.

Merry Christmas. From Mojo in the Morning. It's Mojo in the Morning, Joe. You're home of the phone scams. Nancy wants us to scam her husband. He has been complaining about a loud dog in the neighborhood. Spike is going to call from the city and let him know that he is in trouble with animal control. It's a Mojo in the Morning phone scam.

You're home of the phone scams.

No, no, no. Hold on. Let me explain.

No, no, no. This is Mojo in the Morning. You hold on. I'm about to disrespect you right now.

Hello?

Yeah, hi. Is this Mr. Durham? Yeah. This is Mr. Durham, isn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah, hi. My name is Alan Stanwyck, and I'm over here at the animal control. Oh, okay. Good. We've been having some complaints about your dog barking late at night.

You haven't been complaining? No, I've been complaining about a dog barking.

We've been getting many complaints about your dog barking.

Not my dog, and it's not my dog. It's somebody else's dog. I've been calling, complaining about the dog. The dog barks all f***ing night, man. I can't sleep at night with this stupid f***ing dog.

Well, that's exactly why I'm calling, because all the complaints that have been coming in, they've been asking me to give you a call.

What? Give me? It's not my dog. But your name's mentioned here in the... Look, I have had it with this dog. I've called the cops. I've called you people. I'm trying to get somebody to do something about this dog. I can't sleep all night. I'm about to put a firecracker up this dog's a** if somebody doesn't come do something about it.

So what's your complaint then? The dog is barking. Do you have the dog locked up now, sir? It's not my dog. So you're saying the dog's not yours? The dog's not mine. What kind of dogs do you own?

I don't have a dog. I'm the one calling about the dog.

Well, see, I got a note here. It's got your name and number, and it says your dog's running into other people's yards and barking all night.

Look, I'm the one calling about the dog. I don't have a dog. The dog is driving me crazy.

Okay. Oh, and you're telling me you don't have a dog.

I don't have a dog.

I think it's time you came straight with me, sir. Look, I'm calling you about the dog. So even though I'm hearing a dog in the end of my receiver, you're telling me you no longer own the dog? I never owned a dog. What type of animals do you have there? What? Well, what type of animals living there in your residence that might make some kind of barking noise?

It's not at my residence. It's at the guy's next door. It's not my dog.

Sir, you're obviously letting your dogs get you very upset right now. There's no dog to get you upset. I hear the dog, Mr. Durham. Why don't you put the dog in the other room so we can talk without having to yell?

That's not my dog.

I'll tell you what, sir. I'm going to have to hand this over to the authorities. Are you going to be home for 15 minutes? I'm going to be home for a while, yes. Okay. Well, I'm sending down a few officers to file a report about your dog, and you're going to be dealing with a Deputy Spike who will inform you you've just been the victim of a world-famous mojo-in-the-morning phone scan.

Oh, no!

I can't believe this. Oh, man, and I said I'd never fall for one of these.

I can't believe this.

You can thank your beautiful wife, Nancy, for setting you up on this one.

I'm going to kill the wife and the dog. We will, we will scam you. If I could say anything I wanted to, I'd say that was f***ing funny s*** right there. I don't care who you are. It's the home of the world.

With the first pick in the draft, your choices, Spike, Shannon, Megan, or Mike. Lisa, who do you choose?

I'm going with Mike.

You got Mike. Congratulations. Second pick in the draft goes to Hope. Hope, who do you choose?

I'm going with Shannon.

Yeah. Erin, you're up next. Who do you choose, Spike or Megan?

I'm choosing Spike. Let's go.

Yeah, let's go. And that means that, Kimberly, you're with Megan.

Save the best for last. Hey, Kimberly.

Here we go. Guys, it's first to three. Your name is your buzzer. Everybody knows the rules. Title and artist of the song The first song in the Mojo in the Morning Throwback Throwdown Is Mike

Taylor Swift, We Are Never Getting Back Together Spike Spike was next

Taylor Swift, We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together Yes, that is

Never, ever, ever Getting back together I forgot it was

Never, ever, ever Never, ever, ever, ever. Getting back together.

You go talk to your friends. Talk to my friends. Talk to me. But we are never, ever, ever, ever. Getting back together.

All right. Spikes on the board. Next song in the Mojo in the Morning, throwback throwdown is...

Mike. Shannon. Mike. Justin Timberlake. Nelly. Shannon. Shannon.

In sync, Nelly Girlfriend.

Yes. Mike struggling.

With the assist.

Must be because I'm wearing all this lion's gear today.

Yeah, Mike. All right, Ellen, score update, please.

That makes Spike and Shannon tied with one point. Mike and Megan not on the board yet.

Next song in the Mojo in the Morning, throwback throwdown, is Mike.

Mike. Drake started from the bottom. Yes, Mike, you got it.

Started from the bottom, now we're here. Started from the bottom, now my old team. Yeah, started from the bottom, now we're here.

He will not be denied.

Started from the bottom, now the whole team. Started from the bottom, now the whole team. Yeah. Started from the bottom, now the whole team.

Are we warm yet? Yeah. No, I don't think so. No. All right.

All right, that makes it a three-way tie. Spike, Shannon, and Mike all on the board with one.

I would like to have a threesome with you and another girl you trust. I'm sorry, I have to hit that up.

Megan does not have to be a part of that threesome. So, Megan, I think I'm winning.

Next song in the Mojo in the Morning Throwback Throwdown is... Megan. Megan.

Maroon 5, She Will Be Loved. Yeah. Oh, wow.

Maroon 5? How many maroons are there? As soon as I said maroon, I'm like, please be right. Please be right. I'm going to smile.

I'm going to smile. I'm going to say, oh, wow. She will be loved.

She will be loved. All right. God, this is a good game, guys. Isn't this exciting? Lisa, Hope, Aaron, and Kimberly.

Thank you, Hope.

I asked as an exciting hope. All right, score up.

That makes it a four-way tie. Spike Shannon, Mike Megan all have one point.

Let's break the tie with...

Oh. Wait, hold on. I said meh. I said meh. Does that count as a ring in?

All right, judges say it's okay. You didn't get Megan.

So we get it.

I don't remember the name of it.

I was really wrong on butter.

You say all you need is consistent love.

I just don't remember the name of it.

When I die, I swear it's never enough. I must stop. Maybe this thing here, this ain't meant for us. Baby, you let go and I'll pull you back. I let go, you ain't having that. We do it like a rock star. Sexing in my hotel room, it makes me so loud.

4-way tie This will break the tie

Mike Mike Chris Brown Nicki Minaj get it right buzzer Megan Megan Chris Brown what did you say

Mike get it right Chris Brown get it right he just said this he said Nicki Minaj Can we get it?

All right.

So we get it. Spike. Spike. Chris Brown, can we get it? Buzzer.

Shannon.

Shannon.

Chris Brown, get it.

Buzzer. We're done, right? Yeah. Chris Brown, Nicki Minaj, love more. Oh, there it is. So we get it.

I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. Can we get it? So we get it. Very insightful lyrics. Poetry.

All right. Nobody gets that one. Nobody gets that one. Can we get it? Can we get it? Nobody gets that one. Still a four-way tie. Let's break that tie now I already played that song We're going to break that tie now With

Shannon Let me love you, Mario

Correct answer

You should let me love you

Let me be the one to Give you everything You want and need I pay me good love and protection Make me your selection Show you the way love's supposed to be Baby, you should let me love you

Love you, love you, love you

Love you

All right, what do we got here?

I'm going to put Shannon in the lead with two points.

That's because Hope. Hope is the reason why Shannon's in the lead.

So Shannon could win it with this next one. Spike, Mike, and Megan each have won, so any of them could tie it up with Shannon.

All right. Next song in the Mojo in the Morning Throwback, Throwdown breaks the tie with the three-way tie here, or Shannon wins it with...

You don't want zero problems, big fella.

Oh, there's a bunch of people on it, though, man. Yep. Yep, thank you. Yeah, it is.

If one little trap on me, it's gonna be some dread. It's in your lobby. Who, who, who? You're on the front, I'm on the front with me.

Megan did say her name I'm sorry I didn't hear you. Say it louder. Louder, what did you say?

I thought it was pretty loud. Everybody calls me loud. Three seconds. Chance the Rapper, Kanye, no problems.

Mike. Chance the Rapper Lil Wayne, no problems. Buzzer. Spike. Kanye West, Chance the Rapper, Lil Wayne, no problems. Buzzer. One more person. Chance, your kind of song.

We don't want no problem with me We don't want no problem We don't want no problem with me Just another day Shannon

For the win, Shannon

Chance the Rapper Kanye, Lil Wayne

No problems with me? No, you guys got Kanye in there But it's Chance the Rapper Lil Wayne And Two Tanks

We don't want no problem We don't want no problem with me We don't want no problem with me Just another day I love that song.

I do too. Is it No Problem or No Problems?

It's No Problem.

See, I all got it wrong on the title. No Problem.

There you go. Technical. Go ahead.

Geez, Ellen.

Thank you for being the judge. She's the judge. Still with Shannon, right?

Shannon's got two. She can take it right now. Spike, Mike, Megan, I'll have one. Make it tied up.

Oh, I'm going back with this one. The next song in the Throwback Throwdown is...

I've been watching you. Oh, jeez. Oh, God. Remember the song? Yeah, but what's the name?

Not a quote.

I said I want to talk to you for a little while.

You must now listen to the competitive radio stations that play.

Remember the band name? It's a filthy throwback.

Nobody? I'm going to throw that one out. I know the song title. I don't know the artist. Am I throwing it out? Yeah. All right, I'm throwing it out. I'm throwing it out. Who is it? This is the same band that did Bad Boys, Bad Boys. Oh, Inner Circle. What you going to do? Inner Circle.

Can I say the title, Make You Sweat, parentheses, la, la, long? You're close. That was good. Sweat is the title. Sweat, parentheses, la, la, la, la, long. Make you sweat.

It makes me want to have a cocktail when I hear a song like that. Look behind you. Oh, we have cocktails.

I was like, behind me. Who am I looking at behind you? Make a cocktail. Oh, I can make a cocktail. I'll do it right after we get done with this.

Let's go sit on the patio. It's toasty.

Shannon can win it. The rest of these guys can tie it with... Mike Eminem sing for the moment Yes I wonder if he'll do this at the Super Bowl halftime show I bet he does Oh yeah Yes

That puts Mike and Shannon tied for first. They each have two points. Either could win it with the next one. Spike and Megan each have one. They can make it a three-way tie.

Mike Shannon win. Spike, Megan, tie with

Megan. Oh, no. It's Uptown Funk, but it's Bruno Mars. Three seconds. Hold on. No, no, no. I can do this. It's Bruno Mars. No, leave me alone. No.

Spike. Spike. That is Mark Ronson with Bruno Mars, Uptown Funk. Yes, it is.

What is this move? This is Spike just stepped on a live wire. He's being electrocuted right now because he's about to win a throwback throwdown.

I want Mojo to start ominously counting down for everybody other than just me. I'm sorry. Good Lord.

Your three seconds are a long time. Three seconds all the time.

I don't ever win, okay? You won last week. I'm sorry.

Yeah, you did win last week. Yes.

You can't say that anymore. Don't ever win, you guys.

So here's the deal. Lisa, Hope, Erin, you guys could all win it on this next one. Kimberly, I think you might be getting your T-shirt this week.

It's like when you're taking a standardized test and the teacher in the background is 20 minutes, 15 minutes.

Looking at the stats, Megan, you won twice in October.

All right. The next song, I think we're going to get a winner on this one. Ellen, listen closely for who screams in her name and first. Next song in the Mojo in the Morning Throwback Throwdown is Spike. Spike for the win.

Black Eyed Peas, I Got a Feeling.

Spike has just won!

The throne! Back! The first song at every wedding.

That tonight's gonna be a good night. That's how you know when the reception starts.

That tonight's gonna be

a good, good night.

A feeling. Mazel tov! Congratulations. Aaron, you have just won the throwback throwdown. Got concert tickets. Yay!

Snow. Quick. Update your social media with a pic so your friends don't have to look

out the window. This is Mojo in the Morning.

Mojo in the morning. Phone number 844-MOJO-LIVES, 844-665-6548. Your home of the phone scams, War of the Roses, and the Dirty on the 30. Parents always come up with very creative lies that they use on their kids to try to get their kids to either not think about wanting to do something or not wanting to maybe exert a little bit of effort. Like, for instance, here you go. Here's a lie. The lie when your kid wanted to watch Barney the Dinosaur for like the 1200th time, the dad who told his daughter, Barney died no longer. It no longer is on TV. And one of my favorite lies that I ever did as a parent was when my son had a bike that was kind of a pain in the ass and was always scratching my car. Every time I'd pull into the garage, he would, like, run into it and stuff and scratch it. When I came...

away his bike and told him that somebody stole his bike and that was one that recently luke just found out about we were having a conversation and we were talking with friends and luke we didn't realize was really paying attention and i said yeah you're like remember the time chelsea when i wanted to get rid of luke's bike that he was like never riding and then when he would ride he would always end up scratching our cars so i told him that somebody went in our garage and stole the bike and she's like oh my god you were so mean when you did that thing and then luke comes in and goes you did that like you get from years later the statute of limitations um your dad's ice cream truck lie is very very very funny lie yeah because i've heard i've heard parents say if

the ice cream truck is playing music it means they've run out but my dad you know took it a step further and he was like no it's we didn't even know truly that the ice cream truck sold ice cream until I was probably late in elementary school and I saw my friends buying ice cream from the truck. Because what did your dad say? When I was going around Allen Park the streets of Allen Park and we'd be at dad's he was like oh it's just a music truck and it plays music to make people happy and I mean we ate that up. We totally believed it.

Parents are mean. Parents are mean. Marina? Hey hey I'm here. What was the lie that you found out years later that your parents were telling you?

It was not my parents. It was me as a parent. So my daughter is now 28, but when she was little, she really wanted a dog. And I was against it totally. So I pretended that I had an allergy. So anytime we would go to our friends that had dogs, I would start coughing, like coughing and coughing. And one time, I forgot to cough because, I mean, I'm not allergic to anything. So she came up to me and she said, so the allergies are gone. I was going to get a dog. And I was like, no, I'm going to get a plane. I was stopping all time. Oh, my God. I think she still believes that I have a dog. I'm allergic to dogs, but she's 28.

That is funny. What's up, Becca? How you doing?

I'm good. How are you?

Good. What was the lie that your dad told you when you were little?

uh yeah my mom and dad told me that there was a dumpster goblin who lived in the dumpsters and that's where we put all of the school projects that they didn't want to keep around the house

or hang up on the fridge how cruel though is that these are your great artwork that you would come

up with but they expect you to keep every single thing and i have to explain we can't keep every

Hey, Kristen, this was a lie that you told your nephew?

I told my nephew, but I'm also going to do it with my two-year-old daughter when she gets old enough. He always wanted to go on little dates to McDonald's, and he always wanted to sit by the play structure. And I am a germaphobe, and I didn't want to have to deal with that. So I always told him that we could watch the kids, but only kids who had birthdays that day could go and... Oh, that's so mean.

You are the mean ant. It's not mean if they don't know.

That's right, exactly. He's going to one day come back, and he's going to have to be the person that takes care of you when you're old and in an old folks' home, and he's not going to.

That's right. That's okay, though. I'm still the cool ant. It's okay.

You're going to leave your ass at McDonald's one day. That's right, exactly. What's up, Jesse?

Hey, what's going on, guys?

Hey, nothing much. We're talking about the lies that parents would tell their kids.

Yeah. So when I was a little kid, I used to love lemons, and I still do, and I used to eat them all the time. And my dad told me this story that he saw this lady who was in the hospital, and she had stomach issues because she was eating lemons, and then she died. And I was like, oh, okay. That's cruel. So he put me on a schedule of eating lemons like every other day.

Did you guys ever remember this with parents that would do this? My friend's parents did this, where they said that if you would eat something, it would grow inside of you.

Oh, yeah, gum, watermelon seeds.

Watermelon seeds were the big ones. Yeah, that's funny with the lemons.

And my parents told me that the soft pretzel stands and ice cream stands in the mall were only for paying customers. You'd spend at least $100 in the mall before you were allowed to get the treats. Anti-whatever that is. Antians. Oh, my God, I loved ants. The best ever. And my mom would be like, sorry, we didn't spend enough. We can't stop there because you have to show your receipts. And I was like, okay.

What's up, Mary?

Hi. So we had a great dog that bit my sweet three-year-old niece when she was little because she pulled his tail really hard. but it was...

terrible bite but it was enough that my sister's ex-husband insisted that we euthanize the dog so my mom said that she took the dog to a farm and that he is running around and having fun and i was the most persistent pain in the butt child i asked my mom every day probably for 10 years if we could go visit sam on the farm and she finally at 21 years old i think i was 10 when this happened And she said, Mary, don't you know by now we're 21, we haven't had the dog use of them.

Oh, my God.

And I cried. And my sisters cried, too. We all cried. That is cruel. Oh, yeah. Wait, there's no farm?

I know.

There's no farm.

Probably one of the most common parent lies. Nicole?

Hi, how are you guys?

This is good. This is funny.

When I was younger, my dad told me, he pulled up the Kmart, and he said, we're going into Kmart because your butt has a crack in it and we need to go fix it. I was definitely afraid. I was screaming and crying. I did not know that I... I did not know that everybody had a crack in their butt.

My goodness.

And my butt crack. Oh, my gosh. I'll never let him live it down. It is so hilarious. I think I might do the same to my kids. No!

Sarah.

Good morning. Hi.

A lie that you were told as a kid, You finally found out the truth behind that lie just last year?

Yes. Yeah, so my husband made fun of me when I told him this. My mom used to tell me that I could not shower when it was thunderstorming because I would get electrocuted. Isn't there some truth to that?

It's happened. I don't know. It's extremely rare, and it's not common, and you really shouldn't have to worry about it. I mean, it's happened.

I worried about it for my whole life, and then my husband was like, what are you talking about? You can shower when it's raining out. Oh, yeah.

Aw. Hi. That's cute. Who's that cutie?

Oh, it's my son in the background. We just took his sister to school.

Aw.

My parents also used to tell me you couldn't be on the phone during a lightning storm, and it was just they didn't want to hear me talking to my girlfriend in high school for a half hour.

Yeah, I might use that one later.

Tell your son that he needs to go to Kmart for a butt crack fixie. That was a good one. Yeah, we're going to try that one on everybody today.

Hey, be nice to everybody. You never know who your secret Santa is.

Ho, ho, ho.

This is Mojo in the Morning.

Mojo in the Morning. so sometimes we have to do special ratings on topics that we do to run at special times because parents could be listening with children and then there's sometimes that we have to do something very similar and it's not a rating system but it's a could they be listening system and that is the next topic here it's a topic that has to be done before Megan's crush

is listening to the show I'm afraid of what kind of information you're going to divulge

does he not listen on his way to work I caught myself I was like girlfriend

this is why I don't tell Mojo stop this so he can't leak it on the air Don't you dare drop the ball on the shand. Yes, and I truly believe he now listens to the podcast. I don't know if this makes a difference, so I don't know.

But timing said that we had to do this topic now, and if I waited any longer, then it would be nixed till the next day.

I would also like to point out before you start this topic that you just admitted he listens to the entire show. I know. And the podcast, which means he also has a crush on you. Okay, go ahead.

Oh, or me, and you, and Spike, and Mike.

That is a very good point, Shannon, because he would not be interested. He wants to hear it all.

So good morning, fine sir. Ask her out already, okay?

I'll have to say that again louder for the people in the back. I have anxiety. Don't remind me. Let me get this out before I actually think about the fact that he'll probably listen to this. I'm about to be caught as a liar.

Oh, no.

This is so amazing.

By him?

By him. um so we were talking the other day and I was talking about a book I'm in the process of reading but I may have alluded to the fact that I finished it and that it is very good um because I'm about halfway through and it is really good and um I know that it's something that he would like because I I know he's kind of like

humor and stuff. So I was like, oh, this will be great. Yada, yada, yada. Sold on the idea. He asked to borrow it. Was not expecting that. Said, sure, I'll bring you in my copy. I'm thinking, I'm going to finish this book and then bring it to him. No, he asked like two days later, hey, did you forget? Can you bring me that book? Okay. So I brought the book in and I'm pretty sure he's finished it. So I had to buy the digital copy so I could read it on my phone because he has my hard copy, and so I could finish it quickly so I didn't get caught in a lie or, honestly, have him spoil the ending for me.

So let me recap very quickly. He wanted to read the same book that you were reading, and you're questioning whether or not he likes you back.

No, because here's the thing. You know how the argument is, does he or do we just have similar interests and this is just friendliness? I genuinely think if you knew what this book was about, It's not cute.

No boys reading a book for a random girl.

Thank you, Ellen.

Very true. Period. Never in my life.

And did you give him the book because you thought he would like it or because you wanted something to talk to him about?

No, I thought he would like it.

Why? Why didn't you put a little note in the book asking him out?

Megan? Come on.

But that would have been non-confrontational. She's scared to ask him in person. That would be the cutest, most perfect way.

Oh, God, that would have been so good. Shannon, this is why I need you to pick up the FaceTimes late at night. This is the advice that I need at 9 p.m. This is not the advice that I need at 7.30 in the morning. That would have been a great idea. No, but I'm, yeah, I'm, oh, well, dang it, missed that opportunity. But, no, now I'm just afraid that he's going to be like, oh, you're fake. But I'm not fake. I read half the book. But he just beat me to the end It means he liked it I don't understand why everybody's quiet I'm very uncomfortable I'm uncomfy

I've had that happen to me In non-flirting situations Where people will say something like You know so and so And I'll go yeah so and so And they'll be like how do you know so and so And I'm like oh crap I don't know so and so Or they'll say did you see this movie And you'll go yeah I saw that movie And you're like oh I didn't see it The worst question ever

do you remember who I am

yeah well no that's a bad one

please don't ask me that

but if you ever hear me say yeah I read that book you know that I'm full of crap

what was the last book you read wasn't it like second grade

or something no stop it no for real no it was the eighth grade what the heck is that book something about with FU in the title hold on a second I've got it in here somewhere in my phone are you lying No, I swear to you, it's F the, what the heck is it? It was a big book like a couple years ago. That was the last one I read.

Okay. Do you pray love?

No. No. So Megan, do you think he read it? Like, do you think he legit? Because he's a dude, and I would think guys wouldn't be reading it.

It's actually not a very feminine book at all. It's a historical fiction. I'm cool. Oh, so he's kind of nerdy, too. sure yeah yes so I that's the other part of where I don't think it was like a it's not like he read Twilight or Fifty Shades of Grey

you were thinking of his interests when you suggested the book you're trying to share a commonality

exactly it's not a very common book it's not it's not romantic in any way it's more funny than anything else

Mojo I'm dying to know what your last book was it was

it was the F what the heck was that book? Fifty Shades of Grey? No. It was like F whatever the heck it was. It had like a yellow or orange cover or something. It was an orange cover. And I actually bought the Audible too.

The Art of Not Giving an F. F, yeah.

The Art of Not Giving an F. Yeah, that was a good one. I'm sorry. Also, I did read listen, don't mess with me. My therapist made me read the book called Boundaries and I read Boundaries. Oh, I just read that too. Yes. So I read that one And I listened to the podcast of Catch and Kill with Ronan Farrow. By the way, Megan, do I turn you on? Do you want to date me now?

Yes, 100%. Wow, I've never been. So interested.

I love, by the way, I love that we have to do this topic at this certain time, but yet if the guy listens to the podcast, he's hearing about this book thing.

I'm not bringing that up, guys. That's not what this topic was about. Addy, what's up?

But she doesn't have to face him while he's on his...

Exactly.

In the morning. But the topic was...

Clearly obvious how they know each other.

I lied so I could flirt with him. That was Megan's topic. What's up, Addie?

Hey, yeah. So I heard Shannon say she should have put the note in there.

But what if he...

gonna put the note in there when he gives it back oh that would be really cute if you are listening

put a note in the book you know who you are what if what what if then the what if the note is sorry

i spilled coffee on this or something honestly i i thought uh based on our recent conversations about books and how we've been getting into it most of my books are tear stained um so i thought if he asked for anything else i'm gonna have to go buy new copies and make them look like they've been read like go bend the spines and go ruin some of the pages so somebody who destroys every

book don't lend me one what if he what if this relationship doesn't turn into a like a sexual relationship but it turns into a book club relationship that's what i have a fear is going

to happen no what if well if he returns it with coffee spilled on it she knows he likes coffee and there's a Starbucks in almost every bookstore, that's a cute little date.

You can't do that right now. Well, true.

Yeah. But you can at Megan's house for her book club meeting that you will have with this guy. Have you invited him back over to the house after he was supposed to come over and rake your leaves?

We're just thinking it real obvious who

this guy is. Well, how many crushes

do you have? So many. mojo. Really? Yes, if you play for the Red Wings, hit me up. If you wear a jersey, let's go. Crush already initiated. Don't need to see your face.

Jasmine, what's up?

Hey, so I just wanted to tell Megan after listening, what if he's possibly lying about reading the book just to connect as well. Oh, yeah. Me and my boyfriend connected on a lie about a favorite movie.

Really? What was the movie?

The Wedding Planner. I should have known he was lying oh but that is a great movie yeah he said he we when we first met we we were having a conversation and he was like oh yeah that's my favorite movie and we got to talk about it a little he knew little bits and pieces of it but it took like maybe the second day for him to say i'll be honest with you my favorite movie is diehard

Follow-ups Huge egos

I mean, huge ratings in Detroit, Grand Rapids, Muskegon, and Toledo This is Mojo in the Morning Mojo in the Morning, Breaking and Entering Christmas Wish Thank you to our great friends over at Clean View Auto Wash Red Robin, Imagine Theaters Just to name a few that have helped us with Breaking and Entering Christmas Wish This morning, Mike I was heartbroken when I read this letter And after reading this letter, I realized that anybody that complains about bad traffic or can't finding something at a store to buy for somebody because it's all sold out or people aren't coming and waiting on your tables fast enough, you listen to this and what's going on for this family right now, and you will realize that there are greater things in life that we need to concern ourselves with. Mike, you are out with Grandma Susan, is that right? Yes, I am.

Aunt Susan.

Aunt Susan, I'm sorry. I made you a grandma. I apologize.

Yeah, don't do that.

I don't want to do that. I love it. And actually, you're kind of an adoptive aunt, right?

Yes, yes.

You're a special lady, and this letter just had me in tears reading it. I'm so heartbroken, but I think that we're going to be able to put a smile on some people's faces this morning. Are you guys ready to go?

Yeah, yeah, let's go.

All right.

Oh, I think Grandma's feeding the baby right now. I can see her.

Okay.

They're sitting in the – should I knock? I don't want to scare the baby.

Yeah, no, you knock. Yeah.

Okay.

She's coming. She's sitting in a recliner right now feeding the baby. Oh. Hello. Oh, good morning. Hi, little one. Yes. Yeah. Hi. Good morning. That's how it's you. Good morning.

Good morning. Good morning. Is John with Grandma?

They're getting him right now.

Okay.

Hi, little one. How are you?

That's sweet, Nora. Two months old.

So sweet.

She is.

She woke up just on cue.

Did she wake up on cue?

She didn't, she wouldn't wake up, but I'm like, oh, she knew something was happening today.

Yeah. It's nice to hear John's getting some rest too. Yeah.

He got home at 3 o'clock in the morning.

He got home at 3 a.m. Oh my goodness. Wow. Mike, paint a picture of what's going on, what's going on in the house.

So right now we are, we've all kind of stepped, they've invited us into the house. And so we are all sitting right in the door. We're here waiting at the top of the stairs for John, who is getting dressed. We have the present sitting right on the front porch. We get to still have the surprise, though, because the door is closed. So I don't think he'll be able to see all the presents when he walks up. But I don't know if he's putting on a suit right now.

Why don't you go help him? Go explore.

Go help him. Here he comes. He's walking up the stairs right now. He just said, uh-oh. Good morning, John. Good morning. Merry Christmas.

How are you?

Oh, my gosh. Good. How are you? Mike.

Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you. I'm on the phone with the morning show right now. I want to talk to you. Good morning.

Hey, John. It's Mojo. How are you?

I'm doing all right. How are you?

Good. John, we received a letter from a very special person for our Breaking and Entering Christmas Wish program, and we heard the story of what's been happening to you guys, and I want them to read you the letter. Is that okay? Sure. Take a listen.

Dear Mojo in the morning, my name is Susan Polis, and I would love for you to consider granting a wish for a new little family. Kylie and John Zimmer were together for nine years and married for about five of those. They were the epitome of love. Kylie was a bundle of joy, always upbeat and ready to give you a hug or kind words. John is on the quieter side, but his love for his wife has always been evident. Last spring on their anniversary, Kylie and John announced the impending birth of their daughter, Nora She was born at the end of September and is just three months old She's a happy newborn and the cutest thing you will ever see But then tragedy struck We lost Kylie on November 26th She unexpectedly passed away at only 29 years old we lost her smile and her light in this world. There's a huge hole where Kylie was. She left her husband, now the only parent for this tiny little girl. He's a phenomenal father, but I know he was not ready to do this without his wife. Kylie also left her parents, two sisters, many aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends, all who are very close and are very devastated. Mojo, please grant a wish for John and Nora A wish While it won't bring Kylie back We'll show how much they are loved And that we care about them Thank you for your consideration Much love, honorary Aunt Susan

Isn't that beautiful? That's so nice John That beautiful baby of yours she's staring right at him right now too yeah john we we feel the pain uh in knowing that you uh you lost the love of your life and we know the pain that she must have had too yeah we want to grant this christmas wish john from all of us on the show but from all of our listeners we want you to know that we want to make yours and Nora's and grandma and grandpa and all the aunts and everybody you know Kylie's family we want them to know that Kylie is is thought of and that we are praying for your family and we want to make sure that you guys have the best Christmas that you possibly can have after such a tragedy thank you I know you

know that walking through something like this you have your circle wrapping their arms around you and little did you know I think that we're adding a couple million more this morning okay you have you have a lot of people who are hearing your story and are going to be thinking about you and baby Nora this Christmas

john the love that you have for that baby is so evident and seeing you know how you and grandma and grandpa are handling everything but we're going to try to do some things to make things easier uh mike do you want to like walk john over to show him like everything that He's got to go through. Like, there's a lot of presents that are.

Holy cow. Yeah. Holy cow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. See the front porch, the front patio here is full of gifts for you and the family. Thank you very much.

John, we had so much fun shopping for Nora. it brought back memories of when we had all the

our little ones, buying all the cool things that little kids have these days. I mean, even just buying pacifiers, a pack of pacifiers to us put a smile on our face, but also brought tears to our eyes. We've got so much stuff for Nora that Nora's going to be taking care of, but we also wanted to take care of you. I'm so happy to know that you went out with some buddies last night. I'm happy to know that we're also going to help you out, too. Grandma and Grandpa, are you okay with doing a little bit more babysitting?

Yes, absolutely.

John's going to need some time. So, John, we've got a whole bunch of stuff for you, gifts and things. But we're also going to, along with our friends over at the Detroit Red Wings, we're going to set you up with a great pair of tickets so that you can go to a game. Oh, nice.

That much you got.

We've provided everything for you, the parking and great seats. And I want you to just have a great night. And so you can come home and then be with Nora and be able to enjoy that beautiful baby of yours.

We got you all sorts of stuff, Red Wing stuff. We heard you love golf. People told us all about you, John. It's almost creepy how much we know about you, John. Oh, yeah. We got that grill you want. The grill, the Apple Watch. Comcast is hooking you up with a brand-new laptop. and after today you will need pretty much nothing for baby Nora we did that much shopping

well it's so much fun in seeing you know like Mojo said it brings back memories of it's been a while since our little babies were that little but to be able to buy all those things and see the familiar baby Einstein stuff and leapfrog and baby

shark and 1000 diapers

even hearing Graco travel system I was like oh, my God, it took me forever to put these things together. I love it. So we're going to make sure Nora is set up.

And, John, we also want to be able to help you with the financial too, and that's why a breaking and entering Christmas wish is going to write you a check for $2,500 so that you have some money in an account that you can use when things kind of start getting a little tougher, plus a $500 Kroger gift card so that grandma and grandpa and aunts and everybody can help John. Is John a cook, guys? I don't know if he's a cook.

A little bit, but I'm more of an eater than a cook. I got it.

Guys, I'd like to talk about Kylie, and I'd like to talk about this because I think that the awareness of this is so important, especially with so many female listeners that we have. Postpartum is one of the most, you know, not talked about things that people don't understand after having a baby, the thing that new moms go through.

It's very real and very devastating.

Yeah, definitely. Could you tell our listeners a little bit about Kylie, about Nora's beautiful mom?

No. Somebody else? Kylie's sister's here.

Kylie's sister, you want to say something about?

about kylie emily right yeah um there's really not much to say here they're truly one of a kind um sorry she took everybody in i'm i'm honorary at susan and i am honorary because she she called me at susan yeah from the time she was little and she's just happy she's just a happy girl She still is, I'm sure Loved deep and loved heart Everybody that she came encounter with We've got Several of her friends are here Who love her too

She may only be two months old But for years to come, the Mojo in the Morning show Is going to remember John and Nora And the beautiful family that you have, buddy

A love as powerful as Kylie's Leaves its mark And it's obvious in how you guys Speak about her, it's obvious in how even after she's gone that letter got to us to let us know that we have to make sure that we're all there for Nora and as people on this show as we have personally experienced postpartum depression in various stages we have to remind listeners that some women aren't diagnosed until the disease is already established it's rare in that situation that you don't know you're you're going to have a problem until you have a problem and that sometimes it's immediate and Sometimes it's months or a year later, and it's something we have to be aware of and really protect the mothers as what they're going through is sometimes ignored because we're all so focused on a baby.

I want to wish you guys a Merry Christmas, and I want to let you guys go enjoy everything that we brought in this morning, okay?

Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you very much.

John, we'll see you at that Red Wings game, buddy.

Sounds good.

Merry Christmas.

Kiss Nora for us, please. I will. I'm reminiscing about some Christmas moments. And, Spike, you wanted to bring up the horrible childhood memory from Christmas that still replays in your memory?

Only if people are willing to share their horrible childhood memories of Christmas. Because this time of year, there's always a replay in everybody's heads, you know, of these memories. And for me, I mean, I can laugh about it now, but it's so silly to hear now. But, geez, at the moment, my aunt, when I was little, bought me, I was probably like 14. I shouldn't say I was little. I was like 14. I was a teenager. Yeah. And my aunt bought- Well, you were still little. Yeah. I'm still little now. My aunt bought smelly Christmas potpourri for me. Now, that's like a horrible gift for a 14-year-old boy. For anybody. But she didn't have kids, so she didn't know. She was just trying to do a holiday gift. Well, the potpourri almost poisoned me on Christmas Eve because I didn't know what it was. I never had potpourri before. And the package said put in boiling water or over flame. So I was really into drinking tea at the time. So I thought it was like a loose leaf tea. You did not. So I boiled it and took a sip of it, almost damn near poisoned myself. Tasted horrible, so I spit it out. But everybody's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, I'm trying it. And I didn't know what potpourri was. I thought it was like a Christmas tea. Almost died.

You know what's amazing? There's a lot of Christmas stuff that can actually kill you. Yeah. Because your pets could die if they eat one of those poinsettias. What are they called?

Oh, that's right. Pinsettia. Yeah, they're very, very toxic to dogs. Mistletoe.

There's like five different plants that are associated with Christmas that are poisonous.

Christmas is the death trap.

Let alone, you know, Mike trying to climb up on his ladder to hang lights. Or Shannon trying to get the decorations out of the attic.

Well, I did fall off the ladder. I almost died. I actually took this as a horrible Christmas memory. I saw this online, and I was going to do it in trending news, but I'll do it right now. They were talking about Christmas decoration safety is like a top concern of hospitals because they are getting so many people that are going in already with COVID that they don't want you coming in. Researchers found that 44% of Americans said that decorating their house actually caused a major injury to them, their children, or their pets. And they said that the biggest thing that you've got to be careful of is fake snow and tinsel. They're flammable. They're also choking hazards. The household plants, like we were talking about, those things could kill your animals. And then the electric lights, I know that the newer electric lights right now, they have like an automatic like shut off thing i guess if it gets to be too hot or whatever but there's still some lights that people use

that could cause fires well some people and they like use them way too long they should have been thrown away they're damaged or people that like to

not use lights they want candles and so they use like tons of candles as their their versions of lights don't get that too close to a christmas tree uh charise what's your horrible christmas

memory so when i was younger my mom had santa come to the house for all the kids for a christmas eve party and it was the parents responsibility to bring a present for each of the children so i was about nine or ten years old and super excited and i opened my gift and it's an air bake pan for like baking cookies and it had the mix and everything and i was devastated absolutely crushed all the other kids had toys and i got a cookie

sheet you got a cookie sheet uh not and not even like uh stuff to put on the cookie sheet huh

i got the mix but i couldn't do anything with it because it was a christmas party and my mom she was uh just she was so shocked she was like i thought she would love it but she had actually mismarked the gift and we literally talk about this every year and i I just had this conversation with her that the trauma still lives on.

From that, yeah. Michael spent how many Christmases in the hospital?

I've been in the hospital on Christmas like three different times. Oh, my gosh.

What the hell is going on, Michael?

Well, I used to work at a horse barn for the first one, and I was about 10 or 11, something like that, and I broke my nose with a rubber mallet because I was the water boy. I had ice all over my gloves, and I went to go break a bucket, and the rubber mallet came back and hit me square in the nose. That was the first one. Next one, I woke up thinking I was having a heart attack because I had something.

called pleurisy and basically it's an infection that lands in the lining between your chest plate and your lungs uh so every time you take a breath it just like puts the pressure on and honestly felt like i was having a heart attack uh and i was like 22 and then in my mid-20s i slipped and fell in the shower and i bit a tile bench through my lip So my tooth, like, shattered and was actually stuck inside my lips still.

So every year this time of year, we need to put you in a bubble.

I completely agree. So Christmas is not my favorite time of year.

Yeah, you put a brace in yourself every year.

You poor bastard. Be careful this year, okay?

Yeah, I'm going to do my best.

All right. Hey, Michael. All right. Spike's going to, we're pulling, we pulled out the Christmas piano. Spike's going to play a little Christmas music for you, okay?

Oh, that's so kind. I thought you escaped it this year. I've got to plug in the volume over here.

No. So we got a, it's really nice. It's like a little grand piano that, who's taking this, by the way, when we move downtown?

It's going with us. Is it? Oh, yeah.

All right. You got some favorite Christmas songs?

All I want for Christmas is my two friends. All right. Hang on, because I didn't get to rehearse this, so hang on. I've got to get my wings going here.

It's for Michael. Where are you from, Michael? uh dexter dexter there you go he's always in the hospital

christmas is me why

deals with bells of michael michael michael michael

oh man it's like riding a bike you never forget

killing it all right spike thank you

it up. Okay. I haven't played this in a year. No. Big finish. Big finish. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Come on. One more. I'm doing all the Christmas songs. I know.

And if you ever saw him Alright, excellent. Nice job, Michael. Oh, he's going to keep going.

Oh, he's dancing, too.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Fran Lucido just called me on my personal cell phone here. Fran, are you there?

Hi, Mojo.

Hi, we're on the radio. You got a song you'd like to hear? Spike's playing a little Christmas music here for us.

I like the way you sing. I want to hear a song.

Oh, you want to know? No, Fran. No, there's none. None coming out of me, Fran.

All I want for Christmas is Mojo.

Well, you know what? All we want for Christmas is Lucido Fine Jewelry and all the great stuff that you guys have.

Well, thank you. We've got lots of fun stuff this year.

Yeah. And by the way, the 12 days of gifting going on right now on Lucido Fine Jewelry's Facebook page.

Yeah, it's been going great. We still have a lot of great prizes left worth a lot of money.

Awesome. We appreciate you guys so much. Tell your two ugly brothers that.

Thanks, Mojo. I love them. Love you, Frank. Merry Christmas, Shannon and Spike. Merry Christmas. You two talk funny.

Back to more Mojo in the morning.

Talk funny.

He makes me laugh because he looks like an old guy in a hospital. No.

Talk funny.

More Mojo. So last night I was picking up a Little Caesars hot and ready. and I walked into the Little Caesars there by my house and the guy that was inside the Little Caesars picking up his hot and ready must have been cold because he was wearing cargo shorts and a t-shirt.

Oh, that guy.

It was 38 degrees. I know that for a fact because I went into my car afterwards going, what the hell is the temperature I was at? Because it feels like it's really cold to me and I look at the car temperature and it was 38 degrees last night and the guy had on a pair of cargo shorts and a t-shirt. It was sunny and 75. Who are

these people? What was on his feet?

He had new balances on. He was actually styling in some nice new balances. He had the cargoes, but the cargoes you know, hey, I'm a thing. Function over fashion. He had a place to put all of his wallet and his keys and stuff by the way he did keep his wallet in his cargo side pockets because he reached in there to go grab and he had one of those monster-sized wallets like mike does but i think where he went wrong is he didn't have a hoodie on you put a hoodie on i think it makes it okay then you're ready for winter mike that is an absolutely interesting point because i have seen a number of people that will throw on uh a pair of you know shorts and then put on a hoodie and i understand it if they're workout shorts and they are coming from a workout but

But if that is their going-out clothes, isn't it too cold?

Thank you.

Yes.

I mean, yeah, but I always like to dress like I just walked out of a gym. I don't ever just walk out of a gym, but I like to dress like that. So I fully understand. I don't do the cargo shorts, but I've definitely done the gym shorts a million times.

Do you do the, you know, what do they call the socks that you can't ever see? No-shows. No-shows. Do they do the no-show socks? You don't do, like, the big tube socks like the NBA players used to wear when Isaiah Thomas was playing for the Pistons, like where they're long. They keep your legs warm.

I wish. I can't pull them off. I would like to. I just got really, really tiny legs.

Yeah, same with me. Well, I have the opposite. I've got big, fat calves. Are there any shorts in the wintertime people listening to this radio show right now? 844-MOJO-LIVE, 844-665-6548. You guys, you know what? I'm going to say this And I don't want to bring race into it That's a white dude thing White dudes

You're totally right

White guys might be the only guys Dumb enough to put shorts on And go out and wear shorts When it's like 30 degrees outside

I love this text from 810 I had a guy pass me on the highway yesterday When it was 30 degrees And he did not have a shirt on

Oh my gosh That you don't see as often Was he a runner and he was out running Or was he just like walking around shirtless

I have no idea

Because those guys are always interesting to me The guys in the summertime who have their shirts And they take them off But they tuck them in the back of their pants So it hangs down like a tail And I'm like Okay, you want to show off that bod

You knew that you were going to get hot enough To take off your shirt

Hot enough meaning hot enough, sexy enough

No, like sweaty enough too

Oh, I thought it was sexy enough Because I was going to say, because fat, dumpy dudes like myself don't pull that off. What's up, Jackie?

Hey. Hey. So, my dad, ever since I was a kid, he's always worn shorts all winter long. And I'm 23, and now he's 50, and he still wears shorts all winter long.

Man, this man's crazy. And doesn't he ever get cold? Do his legs have feeling in him?

Actually, no, they don't. He has spinal stenosis and herniated dips.

Oh, jeez, you were joking, but he really doesn't have feeling. No. Jackie, does he shovel snow with shorts on?

Absolutely not. He has kids do it.

Oh, he has kids do it. Good. He's smart. How are you doing, JT? I'm good. How are you? Good. What does your brother wear?

So my brother, he'll wear shorts until it's about like 45 out, and then he'll start wearing pants. But this dude will wear sandals year-round. and not even he's not even being cool with it he doesn't wear socks with sandals he wears sandals with his bare feet year-round there's snow on the ground and he'll walk up with his sandals on his toes must be blue yeah that's why i asked him like aren't you aren't you cold with your sandals he's like no he's like i love wearing sandals year-round he has all these shoes and he

will wear his sandals every single day how about when he's going out for a dress-up affair does he

wear sandals with the like dress pants he might throw some shoes on for something okay fancy

because those are the guys that i i find funny the guys that are funny are the ones that they wear them all the time but they wear them you know even when they're out dressed up what's up

billy what's up what's up are you a shorts in the winter guy i am are you nuts with a tank top Yep. Are you nuts? Billy. Well, you know, I get that question every single day I walk out, and people look at me and they go, are you nuts? But I just go, no, I just love how I like being cold. It doesn't faze me.

You like being cold. You should come sit in our radio studio. Yeah, that's right.

Billy, when you're out there, you know, wearing these shorts and you got the tank top on and stuff, and it's like 25 degrees, like our normal weather kind of is in this godforsaken state. What do people look at you like, like complete strangers? Do they kind of look at you like you might have a little bit of a problem and they're worried that something's going to happen?

Yeah, just a little bit. I mean, I've gotten pictures taken, and then, you know, So you get the occasional carrot that'll sit there and yell at me for being stupid, but

you know. Oh, okay. Hey, are you a white dude?

Yes, I am. I am a country boy, believe it or not. I told you. Yeah. Let me guess. That makes so much sense to me.

Let me guess. You live on a farm or something, right?

Yes, I do. Oh, my God. Yes, you do. Yee-haw. Give us a yee-haw. Yee-haw. Oh, that was good.

Oh, my gosh. Billy, you're a nutty.

Bastard. You know that?

That's what they all say.

All right. Take care of yourself, Billy.

You guys have a good morning.

Oh, hold on, Billy. Here's your song. I got your song for you. Billy's song right now. It's Billy's song right now. He wears his shorts in the wintertime. And yes, his balls are shriveled. I love it. Wait, do your balls shrivel because of you're so cold all the time?

No, believe it or not. Never heard my wife pitch about that.

So they're not like right up, you know, right around your chin or something like that? Because whenever I'm really cold, my balls, like, they go right up to my chin.

Do they? Yes. You know what? They actually make a crochet thing for them. Wait.

Wait. Sorry. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. No joke.

To warm you. What do you mean? To warm them? Yeah. Literally, my wife's out A person that can crochet A cover form

A ball sack Like a literal ball sack

You can have Whatever you want One, two, three, ten How does it stay on?

Is it like underwear? It's a little tie

You tie them around It's like a little scarf For your little muggles It's a ball snuggie, yes

Oh, my God.

All right.

This is what you guys are getting for Christmas this year. I'm going to ask my stepmom to crochet you guys ball snuggies.

Great, great. But don't tell her what they're for.

Hey, I will send you some personal. Oh, thank you, Billy. Ah, this weather is great. Ever wonder why we're jumping up to live here this time of year? This is Mojo in the Morning.

It's Mojo in the Morning. Phone number is 844-MOJO-LIVE, 844-665-6548. Text is 95500. And remember, if you're listening to us on the stream, which is the iHeartRadio app, don't go away. Don't stop listening to us. Do us a favor. Stay with us. And if you have something to say, don't call, text so that you don't stop your stream. What is the best day to propose? I hear all the time about people that are proposing on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. And I got to be honest with you, I think proposing on Christmas is a cop out. I think it could be the least creative day of the year to pull it off. I agree. You did it on Christmas for one sole reason. You didn't have anything else that you were going to do on Christmas that was going to be exciting.

An engagement ring does not count as a, let me say this again louder for the men in the back. It does not count as a gift. And you should do it on its own day. Have a magical special day for engagement, not intrude upon everybody's Christmas.

Here's the interesting thing. What is the most popular day? It is Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is the most popular day to pop the question. Do you guys know what number two and three are on that list?

Valentine's Day, New Year's Eve.

God, you got them both. Look at you.

I did not see this list, by the way. Those are just straight guesses.

Bingo, bingo, bingo. Yes. Well, can you guess what the least popular day is to propose?

Halloween.

Yes. Oh, my God.

I swear to God I did not see the list.

Can you guess what the second least popular day is to do it?

Tax day. Easter.

Boxing day. Boxing day. I don't even know what boxing day is. Canadian. Is that what it is? Okay, boxing day. Here are the days. So Christmas Eve is number one on the list, followed by, like Shannon said, Valentine's Day and New Year's Eve for popping the other question. And then if you go through the other ones, the anniversary that you met comes in very close to New Year's Eve for popular.

Yeah, that's good.

Right after that comes their birthday, whoever you're proposing to's birthday is on that list. And those are the most popular days to do it. And I honestly think doing a proposal on a holiday is always a cop out, especially Christmas, because I think people are prepared for that. You've got to do it in a time when they're not prepared, that they don't know that it's about to come.

See, I so disagree with both of you. When do you think it would be a good one? I think Christmas would be such a magical time to get engaged.

Maybe Christmas Eve is a little better than Christmas Day.

Either or.

I think February 29th, and you only have to get a gift every four years. Just leap year.

Like Valentine's Day, barf. But Christmas, I think.

Why do you say barf Valentine's Day? That's the romantic holiday.

But I've never really celebrated. Like, to me, Valentine's Day is for kids. Yeah. Like, for little kids. Well, it's cliche.

It's more of a Hallmark holiday. But then you give it meaning if you engage. I don't think you should either. What's up, Jacob?

Well, first of all, I want to say I love you guys. And I live up in Petoskey. And I listen to you guys on your radio.

the iHeartRadio app literally every day. Awesome. I love you guys. Thank you. Love Petoskey.

Johan's. Johan's has the best donuts.

Oh, my gosh. I just had Johan's donuts. Oh, that's the best. So my mom passed when I was 11, and I had her ring passed down to me. And when I found the one, which is my fiancé right now, I decided to propose to her on my mom's birthday with her ring.

Wow. Wow. That's really amazing. I mean, that's very sentimental to you. That's very sweet, but I have to tell you, I wonder if some women would be like, that's a little kind of weird. Morbid? Yeah, a little morbid and creepy. But your mom, you know, yeah.

My fiance, actually, she was actually really happy because she heard stories about my mom. I mean, of course, she never got to meet her, but she was really happy about it.

Because I feel you about losing a mom, so I get that whole thing. What would be worse is if you did it on your mom's birthday and mom were still alive. That would be a bad one.

That says a lot. You're putting your fiancé in the same category, saying you are special to me as my mom.

Yes, but don't call her mother because that would be a bad thing. Donnie? Hey. This might be the worst day to propose. When did your husband propose?

It was not the worst day, but it was April Fool's when he proposed to me.

Oh, my gosh. Oh, no. Oh, no.

And did you think it was a joke? No, not at all. It was just, it took me so off guard. It was at the Cherry Blossoms in Washington, D.C., and I was like so, I didn't even think about it until after I had the ring on my finger. And I said, this isn't April Fool's, is it? And he said no.

Right, because that's what a lot of people are going to think. As soon as he gets down on one knee, you're going to be like, this isn't funny. Don't do this.

I would have knocked him upside the head.

He knows better than that. Ian says that there is a day that is the best day, and he disagrees with Shannon. What's that, Ian?

It is Valentine's Day.

So you say that's the best day to propose?

It is because it's already, I mean, for the person proposing, it's like killing two birds with one stone. I know that sounds cheap. But the person that's getting proposed to, it's romantic. It's Valentine's Day. It's like, oh, he proposed on Valentine's Day, and it's easy to remember going forward. Yep, I proposed on Valentine's Day.

Okay. I don't know.

Yeah, you haven't changed my mind.

Yeah. I'm not big on the holiday proposals, you know.

I don't care. But yeah.

For exactly the reason about killing two birds with one stone that you said. You sound cheap.

But let me ask you. So, going forward, it's not like your anniversary. I mean, it's like a one and done. But every Valentine's Day going forward, you have something to reminisce on.

Yeah, so do people who don't propose on that day. It's Valentine's Day.

Well, you know.

We're not going to change our minds on this one. Jessica, what do you have to say?

Okay, so no, absolutely not. Absolutely disgusting. You know what the best day is?

What?

When you have someone who is going to be deployed and they propose that day, that's the last day.

Oh, yeah.

Absolutely. Why?

Did that happen to you?

No. My brother proposed to his now wife, I think it was like two days before he was about to be deployed.

Mm-hmm. Incredible. Do you know what proposing to your fiancé or your girlfriend before you get deployed tells me? that you want to make sure she doesn't cheat on you while you're deployed.

No.

I'm just saying.

No.

I'm just saying.

Why not have faith she's going to be waiting for you when you get back?

And are they still together?

Thank you, Mike. Yes, they are.

Oh, good. Okay. I'm making sure. Thank you to your brother for serving. Oh, guys, the dog's angry. You know what I found? I found if you wait eight years, it doesn't matter. Tori, what do you think the best time to propose is?

Tori

We're going to listen to Mike's joke over

You're good I do not think the holidays are a good time I personally was Supposed to at the end of our vacation And it was Actually perfect We were on the beach It was a big surprise That's a great one I love that idea

That's amazing he waited until the end of your vacation Instead of doing it in the beginning So you guys could celebrate yeah that's that's kind of that took a lot of self-control yeah it was uh he was pretty anxious

uh for the whole week it sounds like but uh he did it and um we're engaged now so yeah that was

really cool to do that's cool i always say propose after you get into a fight with them

So that's when you propose. You know, people do that. Propose right after a fight so that it stops the fight. Right, Lauren?

That's exactly what happened to me. Oh, no. So if this was, oh, God, this was probably 15 years ago, it was Christmas Eve. My husband is a Christmas baby, and he always said, I'm not proposing during the holidays. I already get screwed on the holidays. we're not making it about the proposal so we were we live in the detroit area we were on our way to toledo to celebrate christmas eve with my grandparents and i was on secor road hit a pothole the size of a crater bent my rim it's christmas eve can't get anybody to come out um it was in the middle of an ice storm so we're on like this hill trying to get into a parking lot I'm screaming at my now husband. He's screaming at me. We didn't speak the rest of the day. Get home. I'm in my bathrobe. I'm in my kitchen. I turn around. He proposes. And I kept having to ask him, are you sure? Are you sure after what just happened? Are you sure? It was bad.

Wow. It was bad. Was he planning on proposing to you down in front of your family in Toledo?

He had asked. My parents for their permission At my grandparents' house So he had been planning this For months And who would have thought

I wonder if it's a bad omen Is it a bad omen that you got a flat tire On the day that you were going to propose Is it like Somebody's trying to stop you

We've been married 10 years

So it's like rain on your wedding day I guess

Yeah that's cool

Hey thank you for the call I appreciate it.

At any point, are you, like, worried? He was mad at me for hitting a pothole. Do I want to marry this guy? He got angry at me because my car hit a pothole.

Run! When all you want is to be left alone, but also get constant attention, is that too much to ask? This is Mojo in the Morning.

All right, Mojo in the Morning. Time now for Taylor Swiftmas. Giving you a chance to win Taylor Swift tickets. It's going to be a Ford Field in June. Text Taylor, T-A-Y-L-O-R, to 95500 for a shot to win. You could be going to see Taylor Swift from Mojo in the Morning. Mojo in the Morning. So, Mike, I want to hear this. Mike, the cyber spy.

If I had a second profession, it would be to CSI electronic situations. Have you ever, like, yeah, yeah. So I have found out in those last, like, two years that my biggest fault is that I let people get to me and I react to it. And the best advice I've ever been given is to don't let that stuff bother you. Don't let, you know, the biggest problem is the problem itself. Isn't the problem itself. It's how you react to the problem. And so my biggest thing is I don't react to stuff anymore. I just let it go, and then I take notes. And then I take notes, and I remember forever. But I recently was thrown under the bus here. I screwed up. I did. So, I mean, but the way- When you say hair at work? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay. Like, I mean, I can get into what it was. No, that's fine. No. So what did you do? uh it's so there was a it was email sent to me and there were there was like a whole forwarding um uh whole forwarding emails of a bunch of people basically going back and forth on what happened now again this wasn't that big of a deal but it was a big deal because i screwed up like it's not like like i'm not it wasn't something i was super worried about i needed to fix it and i definitely screwed up but it wasn't that big of a deal but it was made to look like a very big deal And I think somebody was worried that they were going to get in trouble. So they had to find out who did it so that they weren't getting blamed for it. So I was basically thrown under the bus. And, yeah, you know, whatever. At that point, I don't, because it wasn't in the grand scheme for me, it wasn't that big of a deal. You know what I mean?

So what did you do? Go to the cyber spying thing. Tell us, get to that point.

So I, because they had deleted who was on these emails, I went through and they left like little things. They took out the name, but they left little things like the way they wrote the dates and the way they wrote a phone number for something else or whatever. It was very different than anybody else writes like dates or phone numbers. Okay. So gathering evidence. Yeah. The only reason I realized it is because it stuck out to me. And so I went through, and I'm like, who does that? And I'm like, oh, my God, I know who it was. I know who the initial person was, and they were probably, you know, scared and trying to.

So the person that threw you under the bus became revealed through the fact that they don't know how to write dates on an email?

No, they write it weird. It's very, very weird. Like a phone number, too, without dashes or without, like, dots or anything. It's a bunch of the ones. So it stuck out. You know what I mean? It stuck out. So I'm like, oh, okay.

So what happened? Did you bring it up to the boss, or are you just storing this, and you're going to let the air out of their tire in the parking garage?

I told you my new thing now is my biggest fault in my whole career here has been that I react to stuff like this. This doesn't matter. This will go away, and it will be fine. But that person at that point was very afraid. In fact, if we really go into it, it wasn't actually my fault. I screwed up, but I just am not going to throw somebody up.

You just want to know so you can watch out for that person. Yes.

Do you ever think that the reason they chose you as the person to throw into the boss is you have a hard time explaining yourself sometimes? That maybe they figured that this is an easy target right here.

I know that. I know that going in, and I'm okay with that because I'm not. This person was very worried because it would look bad on this person. Now, I don't know what's going on with him. I honestly don't care, but I'll remember that person. So it was a him.

Wow. This person. Yes. This person. This person, Your Honor.

But I don't, you know what I mean? If I react to it like I normally do, nine times out of ten, if I over-the-top react to it, of course I'm going to look bad. And I have before many, many times. Because I let that stuff get to me. And instead of just going, you know what, that person's probably going through something. They felt scared or whatever.

Let me tell you, Mike. You got coworkers over on that radio station on that side of the state that are a little crazy, aren't they? We're all little crazy. You got a little crazy. You got one of those sales manager people that called me up, and they told me I had to recut a spot 12 times because I said, hi, this is Mojo, when I'm Mojo. How can I not say, hi, this is Mojo? My name is Mojo. What were you supposed to say? I was supposed to just say whatever the script was. I said, hey, it's Mojo, and whatever.

Most people would pay more for that because you're giving a personal endorsement.

Yeah, I said, hey, it's Mojo. What's going on? It's one of those type of things. Wait a second. They also write their dates a little weird. Spike. He's classy, sassy, and a bit smart-assy. Another world-famous phone scam happens at 950 on Mojo in the Morning. We're doing the morning show. You're home of the phone scams. Nancy wants us to scam her husband. He has been complaining about a loud dog in the neighborhood. Spike is going to call from the city and let him know that he is in trouble with animal control. It's a Mojo in the Morning phone scam. You're home with the phone scam.

No, no, no. Hold on. Let me explain.

No, no, no. This is Mojo in the Morning. You hold on. I'm about to disrespect you right now. Hello? Yeah, hi. Is this Mr. Durham? Yeah. This is Mr. Durham, isn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah, hi, my name is Alan Stanwyck, and I'm over here at the animal control. Oh, okay, good. We've been having some complaints about your dog barking late at night.

You haven't been complaining? No, I've been complaining about a dog barking.

We've been getting many complaints about your dog barking.

Not my dog, and it's not my dog. It's somebody else's dog. I've been calling, complaining about the dog. The dog barks all f***ing night, man. I can't sleep at night with this stupid f***ing dog.

Well, that's exactly why I'm calling, because all the complaints that have been coming in, they've been asking me to give you a call.

What? Give me? It's not my dog. But your name's mentioned here in the... Look, I have had it with this dog. I've called the cops. I've called Jew people. I'm trying to get somebody to do something about this dog. I can't sleep all night. I'm about to put a firecracker up this dog's ass if somebody doesn't come do something about it.

So what's your complaint then? The dog is barking. Do you have the dog locked up now, sir? It's not my dog. So you're saying the dog's not yours? The dog's not mine. What kind of dogs do you own?

I don't have a dog. I'm the one calling about the dog.

Well, see, I got a note here. It's got your name and number, and it says your dog's running into other people's yards and barking all night.

Look, I'm the one calling about the dog. I don't have a dog. The dog is driving me crazy.

Okay. Oh. And you're telling me you don't have a dog?

I don't have a dog.

I think it's time you came straight with me, sir. Look, I'm calling you about the dog. So even though I'm hearing a dog in the end of my receiver, you're telling me you no longer own the dog? I never owned a dog. What type of animals do you have there? What?

Well, what type of animal is living there in your residence that might make some kind of barking noise?

It's not at my residence. It's at the guy's next door. It's not my dog.

Sir, you're obviously letting your dogs get you very upset right now. There's no dog to get me upset. I hear the dog, Mr. Durham. Why don't you put the dog in the other room so we can talk without having to yell?

It's not my dog.

I'll tell you what, sir. I'm going to have to hand this over to the authorities. Are you going to be home for 15 minutes? I'm going to be home for a while, yes. Okay. Well, I'm sending down a few officers to file a report about your dog, and you're going to be dealing with a deputy spike who will inform you you've just been the victim of a world-famous Mojo in the Morning phone scan. Oh, no!

I can't believe this. Oh, man, and I said I'd never fall for one of these.

I can't believe this.

You can thank your beautiful wife, Nancy, for setting you up on this one.

I'm going to kill the wife and the dog.

We will, we will scam you. If I could say anything I wanted to, I'd say that was funny right there. I don't care who you are. It's the home of the world famous phone scams. Mojo in the morning!

Woo!

20-plus years of idiocy and still going in Detroit, Toledo, and West Michigan. It's Mojo in the morning.

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