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Mojo

Let me take y'all back to the beginning This is it

Alright, are you ready?

You're listening to Mojo in the morning

You're a doo-doo hat

It's showtime! We'll be right back.

mojo in the morning i did something completely stupid and i feel bad about it but you know we get millions of packages sent to our house and at this time of the year it always feels like it gets even more because of the holidays so i opened up uh some of the boxes that we had because chelsea was out of town and i wanted to make sure because they all they'll do is just stack up by the front door yeah then i put some stuff away because a lot of times chelsea will order things like laundry detergent and things like that i wanted to be of help and of course i wanted to be nosy and i thought the nose i thought the nosiest was of what is chelsea ordering for the kids because i i sometimes don't know what we get our kids for christmas until they open it at christmas because i don't really do it well no i mean listen you know it's just me I love that. So I'm opening up the gifts, and I don't want to say specifically what the gift is because I'm going to have to fake it on Christmas. But I'm opening up the gift going, that son of a bitch, that's what I wanted. And I'm looking at the, and going, Chelsea, I can't believe Chelsea is getting, and I assume that it was for Luke, because we both share the same common interest. And it's golf. And I open it up, I'm like, oh my God, I love this. I'm like so excited about the whole thing. And I go, I can't believe that she got it for him. I hope she gets it for me, too. And I look at the package and what the package was inside. And I look at who it was dressed to. And it was ordered by Joe, Jacob, and Luke. And it was my gift for Christmas. I opened up my gift for Christmas. Wow.

Did you practice your surprise? Yeah. You didn't tell him that you opened it, did you?

I have not told the boys. And hopefully they don't listen to this podcast. I think Joe is really busy at this time of the year. And the other two boys hate what I do anyway. So it's like, you know, they're not listening to this. So I know they're not going to hear it at all, but I ended up opening it up. And the reason also that I knew it was mine, too, was a double X. I go, OK, whatever. I'm like, oh, my God. Oh, this is for me. It was one of those things. And has anybody ever had that happen? Have you ever opened by mistake your Christmas gift and then you had to fake it on Christmas when you actually got your Christmas gift?

I just ruined a gift for Lucy over the weekend because when we were in New York City, we kept seeing taxis and billboards and everything. with Wicked on them and she was like oh my wicked wicked she's seen wicked before but she loved it so much and she's been wanting to go again and i said oh i can't wait and then i was like oh i go that was one of your christmas did she get though she was going i go oh i can't wait to see i can't wait to see it with you when it comes to town in january and she looked at me and i was like oh i go that was one of your christmas gifts i just said it out loud but you know i go you're i'm still wrapping it up and

you're gonna open it there's there's still i did there's still anticipation you know because the event isn't happening for me it was like can i put the shirt on right now yeah i know can i wear it

so my favorite thing my brother and i ever did was like for 10 years we would just pick a day we would go shopping buy our own christmas presents wrap our own christmas presents put them under the tree and one year my dad was like you two are so good at getting gifts for each other and i had to be like yeah we buy them ourselves that drives me crazy by the way

i think it works because yes like west did that the other day where he bought this like jacket thing and he gave it to me in a bag and he goes here wrap this up and say it's from the kids for christmas and i was like no see you can't do that i love that no we do that chelsea and i will do it

because then we don't get something we don't want.

I was going to say, you know what the thought of it is? Getting something you actually want to use. I know, but I like taking them shopping to find something for you.

It takes returning, going to mailboxes, et cetera, out of the whole process to return something. You ever see the lines after Christmas to go and return things at wherever? I want to be surprised, though. I want to know you love me. And you were intentional about picking something out. Exactly, yeah. Even if it's bad. That's the worst question right now. What do you want for Christmas? Come on, man.

Oh, I got a lift.

Linda, what's up?

Hey, what's going on?

How you doing?

Listen, listen, Linda. Was the worst hider of gifts. The worst. I always knew I had for Christmas. Always.

Listen, Linda.

My husband was even worse.

I'm going to tell you this, Linda. It's hard to pull a fast one over somebody like myself.

I'm a snooper.

You are.

I'm not here to say it. I'm a snooper.

So, Linda, have you opened up your gift before Christmas? And then let me hear this. Let me hear your fake, oh, my God, I've always wanted this, after you already know what it is.

Oh, this is so cute. That's kind of good. It's okay. It's decent.

Zanelli has faked it a lot.

I haven't gotten anything for Christmas in two years, only because my husband passed away September 6th.

Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. Oh, man.

It's okay.

Hold on.

Wait a second. We got to get her something.

We're going to get you something. Hold on a second. Can we get you something?

Oh, that's fine.

Hold on a second. But you got to give me an excitement.

Give us that excitement again, even if it's fake.

Let me hear an excitement level. We'll see what we got around here. Maybe a gift card or something.

It's kind of hard to give an excitement level because I'm not excited.

Oh, jeez. Okay. Oh, Grinch. All right. Here you go. Then let me hear what you sound like when you fake. No, don't do that. I don't want to. All right. Hold on one second here, okay? Hold on one second. Help Lind out. Lizette, what's going on? It's Mojo in the morning.

Hi. Well, I ordered some monitors for my son. Me and my husband had gone into Bay Spy, and we just ordered the monitors. They're like, yeah, they're going to get to your house. Okay. So Tuesday, they got delivered. I didn't notice. And my son comes in, and he's like, why do we have two monitors in the port? I'm like, how do you know they're monitored? He's like, because it says right on the box.

Yes, I know.

I hate when they do that. I'm like, why didn't you? How come you didn't put them in another box? No, it was just the two monitors right in front of my porch. And then he goes, do you want me to bring them inside? I'm like, no, just leave them there. Oh, my God. I'm like, he already saw them. And she's like, well, trick him because his birthday is January 3rd. He's like, just get him something else so he doesn't know. Oh, there you go. And then it goes on his birthday.

Do you know what that's going to do, though? It's going to piss him off. All Christmas, he's going to be waiting. Where are my monitors at? I didn't get my monitors. Voices, guys, Hillary. Hi, Hillary.

Hi.

Hi, Hillary. We're talking about opening up your Christmas gifts before Christmas by accident.

Well, it wasn't a Christmas gift, but one time I came home. My boyfriend and I at the time were living together, and I saw, like, some papers sitting on the counter, and I looked, and it was a picture of my engagement ring that he designed.

Oh, jeez.

And I actually hated it at first. Oh! Oh! It was terrible!

But in person, it was much better.

Wow. Wait, so why are you voices, guys? He doesn't know that you opened it ahead of time?

She got the ring. No, or that I hated it.

Oh, that's funny. Oh, my gosh. When you found out or when you saw it and you realized you hated it, did you try to, like, hint to him to get something different?

No, I was so, like, oh, my God, I can't believe I thought. Now I just know, no, because he designed it.

How long have you guys been, like, engaged and married now? um 10 years oh my god can you imagine this there's some poor bastard out there that she hates the ring

i don't hate it now but like the picture of it yeah it grew on you like a fungus

like a diamond fungus you know what the amazing thing is i'm always a big believer that you probably are still snooping around looking for other stuff aren't you

Nah, not after 10 years, man.

After 10 years, you'd be lucky to get a card.

Yeah, exactly.

All right. Have a Merry Christmas. Take care of yourself.

Merry Christmas to all the side chicks who thought they were meeting the family this holiday. Maybe next year.

Merry Christmas from Mojo in the Morning. Everything you need for just $15 a month, it's at Planet Fitness. It's a great place for you to get a workout going, and all of us on the show love working out at Planet Fitness. You know that when you go in, you're never going to be intimidating. So why not get your membership today? Go to PlanetFitness.com so that you can see all of us on the Mojo in the Morning show at Planet Fitness near you. Back to Mojo in the Morning. We have the nicest Christmas tree. And the reason why it's so nice, Chelsea just told me the other day that we're not decorating it. We're just going to keep the lights on and keep it looking nice.

I have one with nothing on it.

It's the best.

Literally just a plain tree right now. The other one's all decorated, lights, ornaments. We let the kids do that one. The one that I was supposed to decorate is still bare.

She decorated, like, the mantle and stuff over the fireplace, and it looks really, really pretty. So there's a whole bunch of stuff. And then I said to her, I go, hey, do you want me to bring up the ornaments and stuff? She goes, no, we're going to do ornament-free. I'm like, oh, this is the greatest. so basically it's like we have like a tree lamp in our living room and I love it I actually almost want to keep it year round because it gives us such great lighting you know but sometimes people like to me do Christmas tastefully I think this is tastefully I think there are some that do way overboard on Christmas

so funny my friends Justin and Dr. Matt I love them I've never met them I feel like you have I feel like you've met Justin.

Can I give Justin a quick little shout out? Because he showed up to my appearance this weekend just to bring me coffee. Like, reached out to Shannon, asked what I would like. I've never met him in person until this weekend. Nicest guy in the world.

These are my friends who, one is a pastry chef, one is a dermatologist, and they threw a party to celebrate their stairs being finished. I've talked about them before. I remember you talking about them, yeah. Okay, so Justin sends me a picture a couple of days ago of himself and Matt, And they're in front of a Christmas tree. And I was like, oh, my gosh, it's so cute. You guys are so cute. You cut down your Christmas tree. It is a 16-footer. A 16-foot Christmas tree. Now, let me say something to you. Their house has very normal ceilings. So, I'm like, where are you putting a 16-foot Christmas tree? They're basically putting it at the bottom of the stairs that they threw a party for recently. because the stairs got... There's, like, one spot where the downstairs... Yeah, so it was, like, up through the upstairs, and that's where they just want a huge Christmas tree. So they got a 16-foot Christmas tree. First of all, Justin, you're insane.

Second of all, put it in the living room like a normal person and make it bend like that Grinch tree. It would have to bend in half.

Hold on. Justin is on with us right now. Justin. Hi, how are you? It's a very good... Merry Christmas. This is a very big Christmas tree. Where do you find a tree that big?

Actually, the only place that carries something that big is a place in Ann Arbor called, it's like Jim and Virgil's, I think it is, but it's a little street side, you know, kind of a dumpy tree farm kind of place. And for some reason, they're the only one.

Did you have to, like, bring it in through the sliding door? How did you get it actually through the door?

Well, luckily, we have double doors, so we open both of them up. And then I've got the tip of the tree, and I walk it up the stairs, and then Matt just kind of sinks it into the base. Oh, my God. That's crazy. You guys.

You're actually insane.

And I think it was actually 18 feet. We actually had to cut a lot of the base off, and then we had to cut the tip off because the star wouldn't fit.

Oh, my God. That's craziness to have a...

tree that big do you have to like walk around it or do you have enough room to move around to think sometimes i see people that get big trees and you can't move around it you definitely can't go to

the right of the tree it's standing when you walk into the house to the right you can't get past it like into the kitchen so you have to walk all the way around that to get into their kitchen

but it's worth it uh bethany don't don't you want to see a picture of a an 18 foot christmas tree What's going on?

Oh, I was just letting you know that I made a tree lamp because I like the Christmas tree lights so much. I bought a ficus and put Christmas lights on it in my basement here.

Oh, what I was talking about, about having the nice lighting that we have during Christmas time? It is true.

Yep, I did exactly that.

That is.

For the entire year.

Yeah. Wait, Justin, because, you know, a real tree like that doesn't come pre-lit. How long did it take you guys to wrap, like, lights around that thing?

it's pretty much a process we do the light and then we do all the ornaments and they're and like the ribbon we do like for garland so i think last year um when we we counted the ornaments coming down when we took the tree down it was probably like 350 ornaments holy crap that by the way

that is insane i can tell by the way that you know these are the guys these are the guys again that had what was it again it was the the staircase that threw a party like a seriously so fun party it's such a fun party for to to finish their staircase i want to be a gay man how how can i because i i feel like that seriously i i truly feel like like gay men have you know guys like me that that uh that have wives and kids we always come up with excuses as to why we're not going to do anything we're lazy we want to sit on the couch we want to do nothing gay men for some reason get you know what it is it's because chelsea feels like she's married to a gay man but i uh but i do feel like sometimes it's like i'm like going man this is unbelievable maybe i just take in renters or something oh no or you could just hang out with justin and matt they're so justin and matt can we hang out with each other all right absolutely can we force him to watch drag race

please yeah you're being honorary gay if you could uh start watching that buddy appreciate you so much we'll talk to you later man all right have a good morning snowballs it's the difference between snowmen and snow ladies i just got that this is mojo in the morning kp is out this morning

kp for another breaking entering christmas wish how you holding up they're out there kp

you guys we are soaking wet we are drenched we are we're hiding behind some bushes and some cars

and we're ready to go yeah this is a this is a really special wish that we're going to be granting this morning uh do we have all of our people ready to go our wish writers and uh the great ladies about this yeah okay autumn and scarlet are here right now what's going on guys who are who are who are my two uh readers of the letter tara tara and scarlet i love it tara scarlet all right so we're gonna do this we're gonna try to dial up uh sometimes we uh sometimes we get them and sometimes we don't um but we're gonna try to call up and who's the lady that we're calling up this morning karen grandma karen grandma karen who's taken over as uh more than just a grandma we see this more and more don't we worth a lot of grandparents that step up and have to take care of their grandchildren all right guys you guys mute there for a second and we'll get ready to go we're dialing up uh her hello hello hi hi good morning is this karen yes it is karen it's mojo from mojo in the morning show oh hello i hate to call up our listeners this early in the morning because i know that you're just getting up and about but i understand you got a house full of children so i'm assuming that you get up way before anybody else well yeah sometimes but we're all up right now are you you are a special woman especially special to a couple of our other listeners that wrote in a letter to us about how wonderful of a grandma you are and they're going

to read they're going to read it to you okay okay dear mojo in the morning our names are tara and scarlett and we want to tell you about our exceptional friend laurie she is a single mom to six amazing kids laurie will do anything and everything for everyone even when she is the one should be getting taken care of lori was diagnosed with bowel cancer in 2021 she endured chemo with very few complaints and thought she had won the battle unfortunately in 2023 the cancer mastocized to her liver and continued to torture her body as lori was enduring chemo she continued to work three jobs never missing a day she was is a valued staff member at upper junior high. a crossing guard at the local elementary school and at night she ensured the sick were fed by delivering food to rooms at the local hospital. She continued to work to keep food on the table and heat in the house for her kids. She dedicated her life to her kids. Sadly Lori lost her battle

with cancer in June of this year. To add to the heartache her oldest daughter was deployed to Japan and was not able to say goodbye to her mom in person. Lori leaves behind her six beloved children and her mother, who has stepped in to help keep their family together. Her mother and her children are all beyond amazing and strong, just like Lori. This family is so resilient, but with this being the first Christmas without their mom, we want to make it as magical as possible. Mojo, thank you for listening to Lori's story. We so hope we can grant a Christmas wish just a serving family. Sincerely, Tara and Scarlett.

Wow. Karen, we are so sorry for your loss. Lori sounded like an amazing woman.

She was amazing. Lori was an amazing woman and an amazing mom.

Yeah.

I've got all her kids right here. Well, most of them are standing here.

Wow. and um man this is still so fresh how are the kids holding up well they're doing they're doing

pretty good we've got a um we have a village of people that are supporting this family which is i mean absolutely amazing i i never knew how um you know i live in monroe and and you know Lori being up here there's a part of her life that I was really not aware of you know I mean I you know come and see her and I went to all her chemo treatments with her but the part of her life that involved all of her school friends um I just wasn't aware of that until really until the funeral and when it was standing room only at a double viewing room that people just were coming up to me left and right um about story about lori i just have to tell you about what happened here and i gotta tell you when she did this and when she did that and it was like oh my god it was like a side of her that i i was just learning about isn't that beautiful so beautiful memory to have oh my gosh yeah so um you know the youngest are nine and ten and um and you know

You literally just busted it. Karen, Karen, we're breaking into your house. I hope you don't mind. We're going to get, we're going to, we're going to, we're going to throw, we're throwing the scent off, we're throwing the scent off the dogs on Karen because Karen's telling us this wonderful story and KP just starts a pounding on that door.

That's what we do. Oh, we're, we're ready, Karen. We're trying to give you some gifts.

Karen, I want to tell you that you are also a beautiful person. You're a great, amazing grandma, and we want to make it so that this holiday season, in memory of Lori, we make this the best Christmas for these kids. And that's why, KP, go ahead. Tell Karen and tell all our listeners what we're going to be doing for this wonderful family, the Maldonado family.

You know, we have got gifts for every single person in this house, including you, Grandma Karen. We've got gift cards. I mean, I saw somebody got an Xbox on this list. I'm not going to say who, but how wonderful.

Karen, listen to the kids. That's so beautiful.

That's what I'm trying to hear. I love that.

Karen, you sound so strong, and I don't know, and I hope I never know what it's like to lose a child.

No, it's not easy, that's for sure. She was only 47, so it was tough.

And she was a fighter, too. She was fighting all the way. She did not want to leave her children.

No, not at all. But she's been a fighter her whole life. So she's just, we called her our warrior. Yeah. Because she's just very stubborn. And she took that right into, you know, dealing with this cancer. She just never, ever gave up, ever.

Yeah.

I found a lot of research that she had been doing after she passed away, just e-mails coming in that, you know, just about different treatments for what she had. And she was fighting until the bitter end, really.

How are the kids doing, especially the littles?

They're good. They are seeing a therapist because they're having.

And, you know, they're just having a few issues, which is to be expected. They're just so young yet. And this is the first Christmas, of course, without mom. Let's talk about these kids. Yeah, Jenna will be home. My oldest one in the Navy will be home. And God bless her. Oh, wow. That's awesome. We have gifts for her, too, in there.

Let me tell everybody what we're doing here, okay? So Jenna, who is one of our bravest people in the world serving in our military in the Navy, we're going to make sure she has everything that she would want for Christmas, clothes and gift cards and all kinds of good stuff so that when she's home, she can go and buy herself some things. We have everything for Roman, who is the baby. Roman's nine years old. I know what it's like to be a baby and lose a mom. And I'm going to tell you something. You never forget. Roman will never forget. Winter, 11 years old, going to be getting all kinds of great gifts. Gosh, who did the shopping on this one?

I did the shopping for this one, and it was so fun because whomever did your wish list, Grandma Karen, knew a lot of the gifts that the kids were, like, hoping for but didn't think they would ever get. So you know I got them. All the Lululemon and the Nike Air Maxes and PS5s. And we know you have, I believe it's Jack who is going into the trades and he needed a bunch of warm stuff. So we got him like Carhartt everything that we could possibly get. We got you, Grandma, all new kitchen items from towels to bedding to pots and pans, some gift cards. And we're also, can I tell her about the check?

Yeah, real quick, though, I just want to mention Joel and Jade, 17 and 16. You know what it's like to be kids in high school and to lose your mom at a tough time? those kids have got so much cool stuff coming their way and that is not just from all of us but that's from that entire community that you're talking about those women who are right now in your house with kp that want to make sure that all these kids know their mom meant something to them

and go ahead janna you can tell the rest we're also i think kp has it with her writing you a check for a thousand dollars um oh yeah so that's to cover anything yeah anything last minute that you're going to need to make this christmas really really special for this family and kroger we got

a baggie of gift cards for you kroger is always here for us to provide literally they're giving us thousands and thousands of dollars of kroger gift cards to give to our breaking entering christmas wish people kroger cares they truly care um kp what does this house look like i know I can see it on Facebook Live, but paint a picture for anybody that's not...

Don't tell them it's a mess.

It's very, very festive, and I noticed we've got a kitty making biscuits on the chair next to me. This is the home I want to come to for the holidays. Two more cats? Can I live here? She's kind of a cat lady. They're kind of scared of new people. Look at the beautiful family

photos that cover that wall. What a beautiful

Hey, are any of the kids very talkative? Can I just ask a quick question?

Want to say hi to Mojo? Sure.

Who's this?

Winter.

Winter? And who else is there with you, Winter?

Roman. Hey, Roman.

Hey, your mom was an amazing woman, wasn't she?

Yeah, she was.

She was so beautiful. I'm looking at pictures of her. She was a beautiful, beautiful woman. You guys are blessed to have had such a wonderful mom. yeah yeah hey our show you guys ever hear mojo in the morning

i think yeah you're still sleeping at that time yeah well our mojo in the morning show

doesn't just grant a christmas wish for you now we grant it forever and we want you guys to know that if you ever need anything anything even not when it's holiday time you have people that are hair that loved your mom and they wanted you to know that we're there for you all right thank you god bless you guys kp let's make it more festive let's do it ready everybody say merry christmas

one two three merry christmas you're listening to mojo in the morning merry christmas from mojo

in the morning how is this possible it's mojo in the morning show that you can't be ugly and smelly

well that's the mantra that i have started to live my life by because i think uh trying to be perfect all the time it's too much effort i can't do it i'm setting myself up for failure so i need to change where the expectations are right so i have started doing this thing which i can not believe i have said out loud on the phone so many times that now my family members start saying it back to me and it's you can't be ugly and smelly all right and that's my new life rule i can leave the house looking a hot ass mess i'm talking the hair should really be under a hat because it's so greasy the makeup was done 12 hours ago and only one wing of the eyeliner still remains on your face like whatever you're allowed to leave the house and why do we all have the one pair of sweatpants that has like a hole kind of near your region but not too close where you guys throw the pants away but i mean we shouldn't be wearing those out we got them in college that was a long time ago let it go it's okay to let things go but we still choose to leave the house in these even if it's i don't know maybe specifically to take your dog around the block to go to the dog park to go to the bathroom you shouldn't be wearing them but you are and the rule is if you're gonna leave the house looking like that you have to smell good so at least when people walk by you and think that you're an unhoused person they go no she's not i get that's good

perfume no i get this so something something on you that that's interesting has to be good and

i'm not speaking from a very specific situation that i experienced recently there yeah this was yesterday i had a listener run into me no bra greasy hair my college sweatpants that have a weird hole in the leg that's a little too close to the crotch area and as she's walking by she looks at me and she just goes hi megan i was like no but i smelled good but with no bra is crazy

but what megan what happens what happens though if they see you from a distance and they can't smell you do you have to run towards them so they can smell you absolutely good point good point i'm

I'm a weird, like, creepy, like, gross-looking woman just running at strangers. But I smell the ice. Yeah. Or for me, it's, but I have my nails done. Yeah.

My nails look good. A great other example. That's a great example. The rest of me looks like holy hell, but look at how fresh these nails are today. I'm pulling my hands on my sleeves.

Like, I feel like there are times where you wear, like, your clothes that you look fat in. Like, they're those things. and when you look fat in certain clothes, you have to have it that your hair looks amazing, though, that day. There are times where I feel like my hair looks bad. I'll put product in my hair and I'm going, man, my hair just looks bad today. But I got good clothes on.

You can't have bad hair or no makeup. It's got to be one or the other. If you are having a bad hair day, your makeup better look great. You better look dewy and fresh. If your makeup is terrible,

fix the hair. I do feel bad that you guys feel like you have to put makeup on, but I will say this, though. There are times when I will see...

Oh, tread lightly, my friends.

There are times when I will see and I'll go, wow, thank God she's wearing great shoes. Both of you in this segment are actually kind of wild. What about you? You without a bra is wild? You said that. You too big. No, no, no. You got to have a bra on, Megan. Again, I repeat,

you two during this segment are why. Megan without a

bra, but her hair looks fabulous. It looks wonderful. You see those eyebrows. This is amazing. Okay, does this work for guys too?

What is that? I think this is only a girls thing. I actually am so angry with the two of you right now.

By the way, you say you're so angry all the time so much that it has now become something I'm falling deaf on. It's just Thursday.

Yeah. How are my shoes looking?

Actually, can I tell you something? We went out last night. And Shannon and Wes and I went on a double date with each other. I was actually part of their threesome.

I have a comment.

We were at Lucido Fine Jewelry. And I'm not going to lie to you, but I thought that the three of us looked fabulous. And you can see those pictures up on our social media.

Let me tell you how this actually went. We walk in. Mojo was already there. He takes a look at Wes and he goes, God, you are effing hot. And then he turns to me and he goes, I like your dress.

can i tell you the funniest is okay the funniest is that people got a chance to meet wes for the first time a lot of people got a chance to to meet him and everybody that was there you know from my buddy sal from tsa who's one of lucido's greatest friends uh to even you know some of the lucido like kids like the vince joe and france kids were coming up it was like this is the first time i've seen wes oh my god look at him like he looks even better than he does in his pictures but uh we posted the picture and somebody said that wes and i look alike which i thought was so funny was it like before and after but you know what we're like we're like that movie

no no no i look good out of pocket right now it is crazy no go take a deep breath

that man yeah dude you need to take a lap dude oh calm down you both you both looked great last

night seriously here's what i would like to do though i would like to have wes and i and take have kp take that picture of the two of us together because we took one when we were waiting for you to grab fran lucido i want to get that picture and then do the danny devito and uh twins photo and have the two of us together what's going on how you doing becky

hi um so we kind of have a theory about this at i we i own a hair salon in wyndotte and there's six of us girls there and we tend to go out like after work or whatever um because wyndotte's kind of jumping and we always kind of subscribe to this rule of the two-thirds rule so it's like two out of the three are good you're safe to go so if your outfit's good if your hair is good you're safe if your makeup's good if your outfit's good you're safe so that's great we kind of do this too and i think it's genius that's a great the two-thirds rule yeah what what hair salon in

wyandotte it's called blush hair lab yes but we love you guys in wyandotte and by the way you're right wyandotte's got some fun stuff going on so we'll come down and see you okay please do we love

it we love when you guys are at um district 142 yeah so much fun uh what's going on dana

how are you hey i'm thinking you go the opposite if you act and look like you're homeless they're

not gonna mess with you going in your neck that's actually kind of funny it's funny if you if you look a certain way you actually get more attention and you don't want that attention that's fair but

here's here's what happens in my life and tell me if this is the same for you if i look my absolute best i don't run into anybody i know or want to see and if i'm looking like a hot mess i'm running into everybody i've ever known in my entire life so if i'm gonna look a hot mess they gotta walk away going i wonder what she wears though because that smells good you know what i mean leave them

with something positive i get it yeah but on the other hand you know how many people are you gonna run into down there walking down the down the street yeah it's you'd be surprised it's undoubted

It's undoubtedly every time that you are not looking the way you want to look, you've got the hottest guy running up to you. You know what I mean?

True, but you still don't want to be messed with at this moment? Mm-mm. I'm going nasty.

It was like the time I ran into Jack Harlow. When I straight up looked a hot-ass mess, and I'm not being dramatic, his security went to the other side of him to get in between us because that's how bad I looked. It's my favorite story in the entire world. They thought I was approaching him to ask for money. Oh, I loved it. So it was a real confidence booster. And all I kept thinking was, oh, my perfume is on point right now. Like, if he could smell me, though, he'd be like, dang, who's that girl?

Courtney, what's up? It's Mojo in the morning.

Hi, good morning. Wes and Mojo need to recreate the photo in the elf movie where the elf is sitting on his dad's lap in the really big elf. And then the tiny, the tiny guy. and then you can use it as a break you can do it as a breaking and a screen promo photo that's fantastic

you are funny Courtney oh my god you know what I love though I love about Wes because Wes honestly in the picture he looks much shorter than he actually is I love that his height plays no part in him at all like I've never seen him like some guys that are less than 6 foot tall or whatever some guys are less they that is like their personality like it is it's awesome uh and he's really not that i'm telling you it was just it was it was the way yeah i mean he's he's very normal he's not that tall but he's not that short right but you know what's up uh lisa hi

good morning how's everyone good lisa what's going on i'm calling to put kevin in a time

out this morning oh yeah hold on really why's my mom named lisa too this is kind of crazy

wait wait wait a second explain this for a second what do you you want to put kevin in a in a time

out he's so mean what's going on what did i do oh oh oh oh what is that time out we're putting

are you having a fire alarm now no that's the that's that's that's that's your time out referee

Why are you acting like you're not being wild?

She's trying to extinguish my vibe, so that was a good call with the fire alarm. What did I do, Lisa? You're just being mean, mean-spirited. What did I say? Before and after. What did I say? You're talking about my boobs. I wasn't talking about your boobs. It was more of a complimentary way. You have very voluptuous...

Could you stop?

Cav is going through, for those who don't know, Cav's got some personal stuff going on here right now,

and he's handling himself great.

I think he's fine. No, he's good. You're good.

Yeah, I'm good.

He's okay.

It's Mojo in the morning. Sweet. Five lies to tell your mom.

Jacqueline, how are you?

Hey, I'm great, Mojo. How are you?

Fantastic. It's five lies to tell your mom. Jacqueline, you are awesome because you're willing to let us tell this story. But you're going to call your mom up here. And a little back story. You got scammed by a guy on Tinder for how much money?

$17,000.

Oh, my gosh.

Wow.

And we're going to actually call your mom up and tell her that you got scammed again.

Oh, shoot. She's going to die.

I don't know if I want to get into the weeds on how you got scammed.

Oh, I want to know.

Tell us, please.

It's the Tinder Swindler story. I mean, honest to God, the guy, excuse me, let me roll it. I wouldn't know. The guy love-bombed me from Tinder with all these beautiful pictures. And, you know, it turns out the real guy is a plastic surgeon in Brazil, really handsome man, married with money. And I found his profile. Like, it popped up. I don't know, the AI on Facebook or whatever showed me his images. So I send them to the guy on Tinder, and he's like, oh, yeah, that's my twin. I'm like, okay, I'm from Detroit, Michigan. We figure this kind of stuff out. And so he convinced me anyways. I still believe them. They have the same belt, you know, Ferragamo belt, the same, you know, everything the same.

Oh, my God. All it takes is a Ferragamo belt, and you can get whatever you want. Yeah. All right, so here we go. We're going to do the lies right now. Lie number one that all the listeners should be listening for when you call your mom is, I think I'm getting married this year. Lie number two.

Say, the guy from Tinder said I am perfect.

Lie number three. He's not from here and we need to get him home. Lie number four.

Say, can you lend me $20,000?

And lie number five, I already sent him $15,000.

Oh, she's going to kill you. I hope she doesn't hang up on me.

Well, let's hope before you get at least the fifth lie out. If she hangs up on you after the fifth lie, then you'll still win a prize. We ready?

Yes, I'm still ready.

All right, we're calling your mom up.

Hello? Hey, Mom. Mom, can you hear me? Yeah. Hey, how's it going? Oh, it's going okay. Who am I talking to? It's Jackie. It's me, Mom. Oh, okay. Your voice sounds different on this phone. Yeah, it's a little bit high-pitched because I'm a little nervous, but I'll be fine. Okay. All righty. Yeah, so I called you because, you know, I've been dating, like, these guys online, and I really think I'm going to end up getting married this year.

Okay.

So, you know, I needed to talk to you about that first. And then, you know, Brandon, the whole situation with him, and then there's Brian and all that. But, you know, Brandon, you know, he keeps telling me that I'm perfect for him. and all that stuff so i don't know if it's going to be him but i think it could end up being him if he ended up you know coming and being real so you know that's that's that i don't know your opinion on that just take your time don't don't commit okay the thing is you know he's in cyprus right and so you know he needs to get home and and he keeps asking for money and you know i had already sent him that money don't do it no but i mean i had already i already did remember do you know like back that's why i had the conservatorship and all that don't do it again yeah yeah i i know i'm trying my best to control myself but it's really really hard but he's anyways he's he's asking so i'm just wondering he he he needs he needs 20 000 more like i know i have it in my bank and i know gaz isn't gonna approve it but i just wanted to like get your opinion and stuff I would never do that.

What?

Well, you wouldn't personally, like, if I said, hey, mom, can you lend me $20,000 to send him, you wouldn't? Not him. No.

Why? What if he's real? What if he's not? This happens to you a lot, Jenny. People through the Internet are not real. Until you meet the base of faith and get to know them, then you know if they're real or not.

i mean that's how i feel too but i'm kind of i'm not desperate but you know i'm gonna be 50

so when i just feel like i want to get married don't do something that you will regret okay yeah

i know i know what you mean i just i really i really do love him though i have like special feelings for him i've been talking about for like eight months now i have not face to face met him

to see the real him. Don't you know, Jackie? I thought you were going to be more supportive, but I understand your point.

Hello, mamacita.

Mom?

Is this Jacqueline's mom?

Yes.

Hi, it's Brandon.

Oh, hi, Brandon.

How are you? I'm wearing my Ferragamo belt and looking stylish and wonderful today.

Well, that's good.

I love your daughter.

I hope so. She needs someone real.

I need somebody real, too. And I need somebody that has really good money. I need a little bit of money from you, Mom, just to get over. And then once we get over and establish ourselves, we will be wonderful together.

well if you love her you make your way and and show her what you have to offer as a man

and as a person jacklyn tell her how much money we want to know if she'd lend us uh we're he's

we're trying to get uh 20 000 sorry so he can have enough because he's got to pay off that debt and stuff so that's kind of remember when i said about the financing stuff it's really like that's what i'm trying to do is get a loan for that but you know i i ain't got no money so you can't borrow

anything for me twenty thousand dollars get you a son-in-law mom yeah i'm struggling you might even be able to date his dad his dad's available yes hold on his dad is right here say hello to his dad hi mama mama you there anyway mama i know here you that's my dad hi dad brandon why she no speak to me i don't know i think she's nervous you know american women are yeah she

well and she also her husband passed away my my dad so yeah no that's probably a little God rest his soul Yeah, same on He was one of a kind

And trying to get over him

Has been extremely hard

Well, you know, the best way to get over someone Is under another Right? I don't know if I want to

I don't know if I want to hear my dad talking about that I'm sorry about that I didn't mean to put you on the spot No, I'm sure, but something like that You've got to forewarn me Honestly, I did not know that was going to happen. I'm going to be honest with you. I really didn't expect that.

Mom, mom, hold on a second. Jacqueline's got one last thing to tell you, and it's going to be the best thing about this entire thing that we're dealing with right now.

Hey, mom, this is Mojo in the morning. It's a phone. It's like a five lies to tell your mom, so it's all lies. Okay. So you can relax now. I mean, I would love to hook you up with his dad still. I did not send him money. I'm not going to get a loan. I'm not doing any of that. Yes, he's in Cyprus. All that other stuff is true and marriage and all that. But that'll come in due time if he does his part. Yeah. In time. All things in time, sweetheart. There's other good news, too. I think Mojo's going to tell you.

Mom, hi. This is Mojo, not Brandon.

you've got tricks mom

mom we want to tell you that you just won a prize your daughter had you on five lies we're going to set you out with a nice prize we're going to give you a nice prize oh really yes

And it's not going to cost you anything. You could use that, right? I could use it. Yes, I could. Yeah, you need something good in your life. I do. I love you so much, Mom. Thank you for being understanding and not hanging up on me before I got the five lights on. Okay, honey.

The biggest thing that we're going to do is we're going to take your daughter, your almost 50-year-old daughter, and we're going to school her on not talking to guys online from other countries.

There you go. Oh, there's a blessing right there.

Maybe she needs to go and meet guys at, like, I don't know, church or something. I don't know.

Yes, I do go to church now. I've warned her and warned her about meeting people online. It's just, you don't really know who you're talking to.

Oh, my gosh.

You really don't.

By the way, you might have the sweetest mom in the world. Listen to this.

She is. She absolutely is. I give her a hard time, and I have in the past, and she always forgives me, and she's always there for me every time i i fall janet i got a quick question for you

do you know betty white that's all i want to know yeah no doesn't she sound like

She could actually hang out with Betty White.

She's sweet like her, too. She's like a sweet. And she's got white hair now. My dad used to color her hair, and she hasn't colored it. Oh, my goodness.

Can that be one of the prizes?

Do you want your hair colored?

We'll get your hair colored.

Yeah, to get her at Spa Day, she needs that. And she's never been to a hair salon, so she always cuts her own hair. And, like, something like that would be beautiful.

Mom, I want to date you, Mom. What are you doing?

Merry Christmas from Mojo in the Morning. This is Mojo in the Morning.

Home of the War of the Roses coming up.

Kevin.

Quick question. I'm feeling this. Quick question here as we get ready for the holidays. Um, if you are proposing on Christmas, is that the only thing that you get for the person that you're proposing to your future spouse? Or can you just do the ring? I asked this question for a friend. No, I asked this question because I was, I'm wondering. um when people get uh engaged over christmas do you buy also a gift or is it a complete cop-out because i think it's a cop-out if that's what you're thinking that is that really that would

be a great gift really yeah and very very magical and romantic if you got engaged over christmas i

want to know i asked this question actually also because you know joe has an a ring he got a he got a ring for his uh his girlfriend i'm assuming it's for his girlfriend because he hasn't he still hasn't given it to her and i and i don't know when it's going to happen um my son joe uh from the joe show he he bought the ring he was very open i'm not giving out information that uh you know his girlfriend doesn't know he's talked about it on his radio shows show called the joe show which you can listen to mornings in tampa on 93.3 flz and then of course afternoons on channel 955 in detroit the i heard radio app has both of them but he still has not proposed and i keep waiting every time joe calls or talks i say chelsea talk to him today yeah what's the story he hasn't said anything and then you know the holidays came like christmas or i'm sorry thanksgiving i thought for sure okay something may be happening no didn't happen so i wonder if it maybe will happen over the holidays maybe that's what she wants is she a big do you know she's a big christmas person like this is her favorite holiday i don't know here i honestly don't know i have not uh i've not

asked that question before i say that because like that you know i i could see that that being like a a dream of somebody is that they want to get you know proposed to at christmas time i think that

times are ridiculously hard and if that is the mindset and your partner's understanding of that because you guys talk about finances and all that stuff the ring alone is good but i also feel like Even if you get an additional gift that's not crazy expensive, I think that's the better way to go. Like ring cleaner? No, that would be so lame. Like a thing to hold your ring. No, like, you know what I mean? It's just something else to let them know, like, you know, that's not the only one. Kayla, what's going on? Hi, how are you? Ring cleaner.

Hi, how are you guys?

We're doing good. So if you get engaged, is that your gift? This happened to you.

Yeah, it's totally the gift. What else do you need? That's probably what they're asking for anyways.

Okay, so you did get engaged over the holidays, over Christmas, and you opened that? He did everything on Christmas Day or Christmas Eve?

It was the day we were celebrating with my family back in Minnesota, so he tied it to our dog's collar.

Okay.

And then my dog came in.

And there were no other stocking stuffers for you?

Nothing. Nothing.

What about a shoehorn? What about a dog collar? Shoehorns are necessary. I don't know. I just sit there and I look at it and I think to myself that you're choosing this time of the year because you don't want to buy anything else as a gift. I'm telling you, girls don't care.

If you have been wanting that proposal in that ring, you don't need to give me anything else. Because what gift is better than that? You're so elated. Yeah.

I don't know, I just think that...

Yeah, well, you're going to show off anyway.

Yep. I just think that that is, you know, it's a...

good show-off gift but you still want something right honestly i feel like i'm on the side of no that's the only gift because anything else is a waste of money at that point because to your point that's the only thing that she don't care when you buy a gift for a girl you don't buy her just

one gift for for yeah but you're not you're not yeah what's up ty hi hi so i agree that the ring is enough but unfortunately like for my best friend she got proposed to at dinner time so in the morning you have to wake up have to exchange gifts and like her of course like a ring is expensive so she understood later but she called me and she was so upset and of course i knew but like she got like a lot of sock stuffer uh type things like he got her socks uh like a tumbler and some other like like little small things wait so tell us what she said what did she say when

she called you this broke fast oh my no they didn't they didn't end up getting married did

they did and she was just mad in the moment like she's really a nice person but like if i woke up and i got some like you know little things and i got him like a really nice gift like she got him like a really nice watch like and she paid off uh this flight on the west night so she was she

was really upset so he says she called you her best friend in the world and she says ty what's her first name um mary let's say ty it's me mary yeah mary that broke son of a bitch i can't believe and what did you say did you say oh he's a really nice guy he means well or did

you jump on yeah i hate that guy i jumped on because she's my best friend all he got me was

a wedding ring can you believe it this man proposed but she didn't know yet though she She didn't know that he got her just a wedding ring.

Oh, I'm thinking it was dinner the night before. Sorry, because in my head, that's how we do it. That's what I'm saying. He didn't propose until later. Until the next morning.

Yeah.

I gotcha. I missed that. Oh, no.

He actually proposed that night. That bastard did it so horribly. He should have done it in the morning.

See, I don't think he's a cheap bastard. I just think he's dumb. Because you at least have to throw off the scent of the dog, right?

Although that's when you know who you're really getting engaged to because if she really mother-ass you, then you're like, do I really want to marry her? I mean, she's a superficial, you know? Maybe that was the thought.

No, she was really nice about it. She vented to me because I'm best friend, but she was like, oh, thank you. You know, they were fine. This was great. Yeah.

I love this. And iTunes get a card. What's up, Sabrina?

hi so i got engaged last christmas 2023 and i had no idea but we both said we weren't doing gifts that year so he filled my entire stocking full of stuff like things were pouring over the mantle and i'm over here with like a couple of things for him after i opened all of my stocking stuff first stuff then he read this whole poem and got down on one knee and i had no idea that he was

doing that um but yeah it was perfect you know what's amazing i wonder if there are women or you know whoever or guys like in relationships where they propose to you and you only got them like socks you know what i mean like they proposed and you so and you're like well i thought we weren't gonna because we're saving up for potentially getting and then all of a sudden

they bite in and you're like oh what if you are saving up for a house i would be so angry that

you spent money on a ring oh i wouldn't down payment no i'm so happy i'd be so mad what's

up jennifer hi so i was in a position where we had talked about getting engaged and that girl is waiting right she knows the rings they're they're waiting like every health day well my fiance or boyfriend at the time knew that like you go thanksgiving is it going to happen christmas is it going to happen so on christmas morning well 19 years ago 17 years ago sorry he did the math wrong um he got me all the presents like they weren't expensive things but like he still did the whole christmas probably on like a dollar store budget and then afterwards we were watching a Christmas story, and he said, did you get everything you wanted? And I was like, yeah. And I look over, and he's down on one knee. Oh, that's awesome.

That's cute. That actually makes me cry. Like, I love that, though. See, Christmas

proposals are so romantic. I'm telling you, you're wrong.

Unless you get, like, all the family together, and you start watching a movie, and the movie is our favorite movie, The Family Stone, and you go, am I the girl that they don't want to marry?

You know what I mean? Hey, she ends up joining the family. Just in a different way. Spoiler alert. Okay, that movie's like 20 years old. Spoiler.

What's up, Amy? Also.

the best movie i mean hey so i would agree i would agree with shannon a christmas engagement is super romantic however it is a it is a thing where the ring is actually a contract it's not a gift so if something happens and you don't get married or you break up you have to give the

but here's the story though amy i wonder if it's different if you get proposed to on christmas

it is no it is on christmas and birthdays it's different i wonder if i actually think it is Because when it's under the guise of a gift, I don't believe it holds that contract anymore.

We need to call a judge on that one. Because I'm telling you, maybe that's the reason why you do it that way.

Well, that's what my fiancé told me he would never propose to me on Christmas. Just for that reason. Because somebody told him that. And so he researched it. So I'm going to ask.

That is true. That is true on any ordinary day. But when it is posed as a gift, it's different.

Think about that, guys. Yeah. Because if it doesn't work out, you ain't getting it back. All right. It's Mojo in the Morning. Thank you for the call. Mojo in the Morning show. Megan is back this morning. Yeah. We didn't get a chance to talk about this, but Kev and Megan. Actually, it was Megan on a date with Steve Gabara and Kev busting his way through.

Can you tell this man I did not intrude on your date?

No. We asked you to go out.

Thank you.

Yeah. That's what I said. I was trying to get backstage. Kevlin get me backstage. You didn't say that.

I did say that. You did not say that.

I did because I told you the comedian was staring at my boobs the whole time and I thought I had a shot. Who is the comedian? Jeremy Piven was staring at my boobs that whole set dude. He was zoned in on the target and the target was my chest.

The target was out.

I thought, wow, I really actually have a shot at a 401k for words.

You guys went to the show and it was for Defeat the Label, which is a great organization.

It was a fantastic event for a great organization, anti-bullying, a night of comedy. Jeremy Piven was the headliner. He was hilarious. And then after the show, Megan texted me, and I came out, saw her and Stevie G, and we went to go get food and drinks afterwards. And we're at a place, and we have a nice-looking waitress, and we're all having fun having drinks.

Nice-looking is an understatement.

Megan thought she was cold. I didn't think she was that cold.

Yeah, and then you told me I had bad taste, which is like a... I did not say you had bad taste.

So anyway, Megan, I did not say she had bad taste. Megan goes, I bet she's in the girls. I'm like, what makes you say that? Why do you feel like that? She has wooden earrings. It's a dead giveaway. Wooden? Wooden earrings made out of wood. In my mind, I'm like, how is that a dead giveaway? Megan's like, oh, yeah, she's lesbian. Wooden earrings. Also, if her pants are cuffed twice, lesbian.

She also had space buns. Lesbian. Let me tell you.

She is a lesbian. Wait, so were you able to confirm or deny this information? Well, the best part about all this is that Kevin and I started arguing over our taste

and who could, like, if she had to pick somebody at the table, who would it be? And I was adamant, like, oh, this girl is going home with me. Are you kidding me? She's going home with me. I think she's super hot. That's me. And Kevin was like, nah, nah, I don't think she's into girls. And I was like, wooden earrings, space buns, double cuff pants. She's into girls. Let me tell you, she plays for my team, buddy. At the end of the dinner.

Wooden earrings are a dead giveaway?

Yes. Apparently. According to Megan, wooden earrings, space buns, and double cuff pants.

What are wooden earrings? Arrings that are made of wood?

They were earrings that were made out of wood that were unfinished and unpainted. It was raw wood, baby. She was a raw dog on the eaters.

She gave off the vibe like she make her own deodorant. For sure she did. So the wooden earrings is like, it looked like that's her thing. Okay, are we sure that she's gay or is she a granola mom? Let me tell you.

No, no, no, no. She gay. And let me tell you, I have actually a terrible gay dar. I have dated so many gay men in my life, it's not even funny. But I have a great lesbian dar. And let me tell you, it was going, every time she walked up to the table. And at the end of the dinner, she comes up and she brings a check. And she talks to all of us. She's so sweet, by the way. She's great. Great service. And at the end of the night, she thanks everybody for coming. And she looks dead at me. And she goes, but especially you. I'm really glad you came out tonight. Did you get her number? Bro, let me tell you, I was begging, begging to pay this bill so that I could leave my number. And Steve Gabara was like, I got it. I was like, Steve. Why did you ask her?

Steve and Gabara. Megan's being polite. I don't even think she looked at Steve and I when she said goodbye. Like, it was like we didn't exist. She looked straight at Megan the entire goodbye.

Why didn't you ask her for her number? I literally was going to write it on the tag, and Steve was like, Repeat it. Don't worry. Tell me about who paid the check. Ask. Like face-to-face. Ask her for her number. We closed down the restaurant. Even better. You could have stayed after and had a drink with her. Was anybody around when we left? Well, she was. No, there wasn't a person in that building. She got the check in there.

Do we believe Megan would date a woman? Because I know you said this.

She has dated a woman. You have? Yes.

No, you have not.

Yes. Two.

I have not heard ever.

I slept with a woman before I ever slept with a man.

Really? Yeah. When?

High school.

So high school is when you, so when's the last, when's the last time I slept with a woman? No, when's the last time you dated a woman though?

College.

Okay. So let's put a list together. What are your giveaways for women?

Space buns.

Space buns. Those are like ball hairs. Two buns. You do it.

Two buns on the top of your head.

Wooden earrings

Double cuffed pants She said Shani's granny used to ask my sister If she was a lesbian Because she always wore flannel shirts We love a classic Butch lesbian We love it I love when you give me the telltale signs If you're wearing an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt Lesbian

Unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt

I would say at this point Bermuda shorts just in general Yeah. Yeah. Remeer shorts. They're going to give it away. If you wear Vans, I'm just going to go out on a limb and say. Girls that wear Vans. Absolutely. What about Vans? Maybe not high top Vans. Maybe we'll just do low top Vans. That's such a stretch. Low top Vans. Lesbian. Low top Vans. Yeah, for sure. I've been told that I dress like a lesbian.

Several times. Several times.

See, I always think that you're just country. That it's got to.

Thank you. I know. I'm super, thanks for having me. I'm popping something, I can be better, I'm a fake.

Mojo in the morning.

I'm super, nothing fucks me.

Ashley.

What is that? Hello?

What's going on?

Hey.

We're talking about Megan's gaydar here.

Yeah, I was going to say if her fingernails are cut really short, she's probably a lesbian. Especially if there's just two.

Short fingernails. Two fingers? Really? So girls with short nails are...

Oh, my God. I just got that. Really? You have to do a gesture for me to understand. Interesting. I understand fully. Thank you. I'm glad I got the last one. For touching so you don't scratch. Yes. No.

Thank you. Yes.

Wow. Angie, what's going on?

Hey, how are you guys this morning?

Good. What's up?

So I am straight married and I have wood earrings, so I don't agree fully with Megan's theory, but I have a daughter who is a college student in Bayon. She does have low bands. She's not

off. Are you wearing her earrings?

Angie, I don't know how to tell you this, but it is a spectrum and you're on it.

You know, double cuff pants could be, she's just short because I'm five foot and I have to double cuff everything because I'm just...

Straight girls cut their pants.

Straight girls cut their pants.

Thanks. What's up, Colin? Hi.

Hey, how you guys doing?

Good. What's up?

I'm saying girls with split dye hair are 100%.

Oh, that's a great one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure.

Oh, yeah. I have not met anyone without it. Oh, and a first-time caller. That's right. It's almost all. I don't know if you guys called me. Sorry.

Yeah. So it's your turn. Thank you. Oh, we called you because you texted us. Yeah. Thank you. By the way, reminder, if you send us a text, pick up your phone if you get a call from an unknown area or from an iHeart number. What's up, Hunter? How are you doing?

Good. How are you?

Good. Your name is Hunter.

Well, so Hunter is my daughter's name, but she wears Bermuda shorts with open button-down shirts and a tank top underneath all the time.

She's got the trifecta. Nailed it.

She does. She also wears bands, but she keeps her hair very short, and she does not wear earrings. She also keeps her nails really short. I, however, wear space buns.

Oh, okay.

And I am not a little man.

so that's that's that's good again do you think i mean there are there are times i have a gay son there are times i might try to wear some of his clothing but do you ever maybe that's it maybe

it's like that last caller it's a whole it's a whole vibe i mean the way she like walks and you can tell but um megan's pretty straight pretty right on but some of the details are a little I don't know.

I wouldn't say pretty straight. I would just say pretty correct in this situation. I was going to say that.

Thanks for the call. I appreciate you so much. Tell Hunter we love her.

Yeah, I will.

All right. What's up, Paige? Hi.

Hi. I was actually going to comment because I'm a lesbian, and I wear a bunch of rings. I keep my nails short, and I wear a choker. I feel like a bunch of rings and a choker, too, is a big sign of being a lesbian.

Thank you for the call. Appreciate it, Paige.

There is a reason why the symbol is a rainbow because it is a spectrum.

Alexis, what's up?

Hey, how are you guys?

Good, what's up?

So I am actually the only straight girl in my group of female friends and all of them have a septum piercing with the nostrils. So I think that must be a telltale sign that you're a lesbian.

Have you ever asked them if that's the case?

I haven't, but they have also pressured me to get my nose pierced. And I'm like, I don't know. If we're all hanging out, people would get the wrong idea.

I feel so called out because I do have my septum and my nose pierced, and I didn't even think that it.

you're right that's a telltale sign right there quick question for you when you guys all go out as a group of girls and a guy comes over to hit on any of your friends is it good to be the lone non-gay girl that can basically have the guy you know no they point to you and stuff i mean

i guess if i wasn't in a five-year relationship oh okay did you find your guy that way is that what's that i like this one christina what's yours oh mine is hello um mine is uh multiple pairs of doc martens oh as a bi woman myself i have multiple pairs of doc martens

you got your chelsea boots you got your vegan leather ones you got the red ones you definitely

got ones with the cool laces is it hard when you have multiple pairs to find a place to fit them

in your closet, though? Of course it is. I have a closet that's literally half Doc Martens. Oh, it definitely is.

Hey, thank you for the call. I appreciate it.

Yeah, no problem. Have a good day.

Ava wants to say that Megan is spot on. What's up, Ava?

I am driving to work laughing. I'm bisexual and she pretty much described me with Bermuda shorts, face buns, the van. And I'm just cracking up on the way to work. Like, oh, my gosh, am I that obvious?

But if you're bisexual, do you also dress straight occasionally?

I mean, I guess I never really looked at it as, like, dressing straight or gay.

Like, do you have days where it's like, you know, I'm not going to wear that today?

Yes. I would have to say that there are days where I put on something, and I'm like, well, maybe not.

I'm just not, I'm not feeling as gay today as I did yesterday.

Exactly.

All right, thank you.

It's a spectrum, you guys. It's a spectrum.

By the way, it is Pride Month, so happy Pride Month.

Merry Christmas to all the side chicks who thought they were meeting the family this holiday. Maybe next year.

Merry Christmas from Mojo in the Morning. Mojo in the Morning show. uh this is the home of the war of the roses uh the second date update and of course the dirty on the 30 good to have you guys here with us i don't know what has gotten over me maybe this is one of those uh megan this is like a therapy moment for me i don't know love them but uh i used to be horribly jealous person like i could not even hear the name of my wife's uh former boyfriends without, like, getting jealous that they were in my bedroom with her at that moment. You know what I mean? Like, I never, I was a jealous person. Are you a jealous person, Kev? I don't even know. You seem, like, pretty confident. I'd be chilling.

No, that's a lie.

I used to be so bad, Kevin, if I heard somebody's name that was the same name of somebody that Chelsea had a relationship with, and we've been in a relationship for a very long time, it would drive me crazy. Or if there were certain guys that were, you know, guys that I thought were good-looking guys and they were nice to my wife it drove me crazy but something has changed and i don't know what it is i am now turned on by it um chelsea and i were out at a bar and we were sitting at the bar and we were having drinks and we were ordering we ate lunch she hates sitting at bars but she does

for me as a uh you know hey here you go i'll give you a little thing you know so she doesn't have to give me something in the bedroom we sit at a bar long story short every guy in the freaking bar was talking to her and not me i get the whole time the guys were talking to her oh my god your hair looks great like i'm like going hey you can't compliment another woman's hair in front of me but you know what i was fine with it yeah and i look at her and i go yeah your hair does look great and then we met a couple of guys that we knew and they and chelsea has been like working on herself this year and she's been doing an amazing uh job with herself and she is like hot as hell and the guys were all talking about how beautiful she is and they came over they gave her hugs gave me nothing i would have wanted to find a knife and stab them in the neck but i didn't I don't know what it is, but why is it that I like when guys flirt with my wife? And I wanted to ask this question and see if you guys have ever been in this situation. What would you do if you witnessed your spouse being hit on? Like, what would be the thing that you would do? Shannon, what would you do if you witnessed, or did she walk out of the room? Oh, she had a bad dog. Oh, she had a shit dirty or something? Oh, okay. What did, okay. What would you, what would I do if I, oh, there you are. I didn't even see you walk out I was asking this question, Shannon What would you do if you witnessed a woman hitting on your husband? Oh, I would cut a bitch You would cut her? Really?

No, I'm just kidding I'll get you up, bitch Sorry, I'm like, I had to go edit something I get really jealous and territorial

Really? Okay

So I don't think that I would love that

Shannon, I don't know if you heard me say this I, for some reason, have been into it lately I love when I see Chelsea getting hit on. It makes me feel, like, proud that I get to go home with the trophy. You know what I mean?

Yeah, I'm not. You're not there yet. I'm not there yet. No. I just look at the dollar signs and what I'm saving by somebody else buying them drinks. You go ahead.

You do you, boo. I don't know what it is. Actually, nobody bought us drinks, but some guy was actually, like, talking across the bar at Chelsea. And he was, like, talking across the bar. And he was, I swear to God, I am a big man. how am i not noticeable i started throwing in comments and it was like white noise they had no idea what's going on uh what's up we're voice disguising e what's up e

hi so i used to also get like super jealous whenever other girls would hit on my fiance and then we started sleeping with girls together and so now like whenever they hit on him i really They don't care if it's like an opportunity for the both of us.

Okay, so wait a second. So your fiancé is a guy, and you're saying that you guys, you would get jealous when girls would hit on him. Now you guys are doing a little fun, what, threesomes or something like that, huh?

Yeah, pretty much.

I would like to have a threesome with you and another girl you trust. Does that excite you at all or no?

Okay, so that's interesting. So do you guys ever get jealous in the bedroom now when you're with each other? Like, do you get jealous if they're paying more attention to each other than you?

No, he's really good at making sure, like, I'm comfortable and that I'm initiating everything. And I didn't even know that I was, like, bisexual until we started dating. So it's a really good opportunity for me, too, to, like, explore my sexuality. So it's really fun.

That's interesting. Wow. Good for you. Somebody said there's a term for this. I did not know that there was a term for this. But, Kristen, what is it?

uh i said that you've been watching too much cuckold porn cuckold oh really why why would

it i don't even know what it is i'm about to google it though if it's just the name and we don't say what it is it's just the name

yeah the definition yeah just well no no definitions are literal words no but

foreign definition no but if it's if it explains it you can't say it but if you can just this

definition right here wait hold on i'm where they're having an affair that literally that's

the only okay let megan see it let megan see it read it off i'm asking you a question see if you can read this huh i can't read that it's so like a doctor it's already passed you'll say it it's already passed okay so you're saying i watch this porn i don't watch that porn i i don't usually it's usually it's like stepsister porn like stuff like that i don't know i don't know do you want know what kind of porn i watch um i don't know what what okay so what is so what so this is something that i'm a cuck holder i guess huh okay interesting i don't know what it is but okay i'll check it is it weird that i like it that i like when uh and it's innocent like she's still with me it's not like she's you know reaching across uh and kissing anybody or anything like that.

You know, that's the next stop.

Okay, that is the next stop. I will let everybody know when that happens. What's up, Jason? How you doing?

I'm good. How are you, Mojo, and everybody there?

We're doing good. Jason, are you in a relationship?

I am in a relationship, yeah.

How would you feel if another man was hitting on your woman?

I actually love it.

Okay, you're like me.

I am like you, and there's no cocoa situation going on here at all. So don't let nobody tell you that.

Yeah.

I think what it is is that, like, now you're more confident in your relationship. You know, that whoever's hitting on your wife is not going to get her because you're confident in that. You know, that's a very good point.

There have been times where I don't think Chelsea and I were in good places. And I think the times that we weren't in good places are usually the times when it used to drive me the most crazy. Like, even if we both equally didn't like each other, if I saw, you know, her talking to another person, I always just assumed something like that. Mike, what's up?

Hey, how's it going, Mojo? First time caller. Yeah!

Nice interview! What's up, Mike?

So, I have a beautiful wife, and she has what I like to call an end table booty. So, like, literally at the bar, set your beer on it, go to the bathroom, come back, your beer's still there. All right. So anywhere that we go, I'm always watching every dude's eyes because I am a jealous person. And we'll be in the grocery store, wherever we're at. And literally, I'll walk past, you know, we'll walk past the guy. I just watch that guy's eyes. He makes his way around in my wife's butt. And then it'll go from her butt to my death stare. Always just look right away like they just look at the ceiling everywhere.

That's great.

And that's how I handle that. Yes, I am a jealous person.

Mike meet Vinny. Vinny meet Mike. Guys, say hello to each other. What's up, Vinny? Vinny is completely different than you. He's up on our call screen board. Mike, you want to give this guy the death stare? You want to probably do what Shannon did and stab the bitch.

I mean, absolutely. I keep an eight-inch hunting blade in my pocket. All right.

Mike's different. Mike, what do you say? Vinny, I'm sorry. Vinny, I apologize.

I think it's been a first-time caller a long time ago. Hey, we got two.

I love it. Two first times. What's up?

No, no, that's about my fifth time. Y'all never did it to me.

Oh, we can't get back. You're a liar.

No, man, I usually, like, my drug is so sexy. I mean, she got her ditties, butt, everything. She put on them tight dresses. We go out, especially, like, downtown or something, or to the mall. I walk about six, eight, ten steps behind. and just watch people just like, ooh, ooh, just turn around, look at her, and all this, I feel like I want to go f*** with her.

Oh, no, hold on a second. All right, stop that. Now we've got to dump that. We can't do that. We can't have that one on.

Good morning. The other words were fine that everybody was saying, but we have to stop them at that one. But wait a second. I'll say it. I'll translate for you like you're speaking a foreign language. What Vinny says differently than Mike is, he likes to walk around a mall, and when people are checking out his wife's chest and butt, he actually gets so turned on by it, he goes home and pleasures himself to that.

No, I don't go that far. No, I'm just saying. But it gets you turned on.

That's interesting. What do you think about that, Mike? You think that's weird?

I mean, me personally, I would not do it. It makes my blood boil, Mojo. Like, you know, I love my wife. I've dedicated my whole life to my wife, her, to me. And I know she's the most loyal woman, so I never really have to worry about that. But it's more of like kind of a territorial thing with me. Like I let that guy know in that moment, and I'll wait. I got nothing but time. If he wants to look away or anything, I'll catch that guy in the next aisle in the grocery store. And I'll stand down the whole way. I let them know that I know what they're doing. And they generally look the other way. I mean, I'm not a small, non-intimidating guy by any means.

But at the same time, it's like, not what do you expect me to do, but if the woman is, like you say, end table booty, it's like, how am I not going to look? Right.

And I can understand that, but at the same time, that's my end table booty.

I won't look at a girl if she's with her man or children. I don't want to do that. It's disrespectful.

Yeah, I'll have my whole family with me. We got four kids together, so.

Would you stab another man in front of your kids?

I mean, I have two sons, and I would like them to learn the proper way to treat their woman.

How to murder her!

Honestly, I think my kids, my sons would stab another man if they were looking at their mom. Keith has a question for you.

me and then i gotta wrap this up keith hi all right you need to resend the comment of you being a cuckold yeah i don't think that you're fully fully understanding this let me put it in lamest terms uh that would be basically you sitting in a corner while chelsea is oh no no no no i couldn't

do that i couldn't do that i'm not a i'm not that i that's not me i'm a little boring you know we watch real housewives of beverly hills usually so that that yeah thank thank you for the call buddy i appreciate it no problem all right you take care of yourself and uh thanks uh

mojo he likes big butts and he cannot lie this is mojo in the morning hey even if you're single you're still getting screwed in many ways of your life screwed financially screwed by friends to tell you one thing then do another screwed by your employer see you can still get screwed without having sex this moment of clarity brought to you by mojo in the morning mojo in the morning

show uh shannon and an embarrassing sports mom moment i never played sports ever so that is my

that's my excuse for anything that i do wrong because i've talked about this for a very long time i am the absolute worst sports parent i never have any clue what is going on lucy plays lacrosse smith plays baseball they both swim and play golf and tennis at like i don't know what is going on ever okay i was a theater kid yeah and a ballet kid but you but you have to take them to a bunch

of things and you have to sit in the stands and a bunch of things yep and so over the weekend

And they both were involved in a swim meet out at Fenton High School. So I was on that side of town all day on Sunday. Totally clueless. Like, I really am just learning about events and heats and these little grid things that they write on their arms to know where they're supposed to be on the pool deck for each event lane and blah, blah, blah. So Wes was with me for this swim meet on Sunday. And we're sitting in the stands and I see Smith on the pool deck. I mean, there's hundreds and hundreds of kids, but I can kind of see like our, our group, our crew. And I see Smith and he's getting ready, you know, to jump in. He's getting ready for his event, which he was doing backstroke, I think. So I'm like cheering so loud for him and I'm standing up and like waving. So he knows exactly where I'm sitting. So he can look, you know, when he gets done and Wes goes, um, that's not your son. I was cheering for a child that looked just like my six-year-old, but definitely was not Smith. The kid's name was Leo, who looks just like Smith. I know who he is. He's also on the team. And most of them wear swim caps with their names on them, like their last names on them. Well, Smith doesn't like to wear a swim cap. Okay. And neither does Leo. And they have the same hair and body structure. and they were wearing the same little, you know, swim briefs, whatever.

But no, definitely wasn't Smith. How long were you cheering for him before you realized?

Probably like a good minute. That's not my child. And obnoxiously cheering.

Really?

Because it's me.

And you were calling Leo Smith.

Yes.

And did Leo's family look at you here?

There were so many people there. If they were there, they were, you know, probably like, well, that's not Smith. Yeah. They would be like, what's in that cup, Shannon?

It was coffee You know that this has happened to some other parents You gotta call us up and tell us If this has ever happened to you Because that's a pretty embarrassing thing When you don't even know your own child When you were the one that probably Dressed your child

I did that with the Halloween parade This year I thought Ceci was dressed up as But it was the wrong kid I was like giving him high fives

If there's an arrow hoop or hole in the ground I hope they get it in Now, after the fact, I learned that he had to do...

This is a song perfect for you, by the way.

What is it? It's a go sports girl about two girls talking about sports who know nothing about sports. Sports go sports!

That's me.

And I have to tell you, I'm so excited when I go to see my kids at things because they are... Like, I'm in awe of them. I could not... I can't swim. I can doggy pedal. So, it's so cool to me that they can do these things, you know, and I get overly excited.

But to you, you, uh, does the apple fall far from the tree with either one of the kids or did they get their dad's athletic ability?

Hopefully because no, I mean, I don't have an athletic bone in my body. No, that's what I'm saying.

You, you're not, you're not a sports person, but you're Andrew. I mean, Andrew, my ex-husband is sometimes it's sad in, in homes where, you know, you'll find out that dad's not a real good athlete, but mom was a good athlete.

or vice versa in this case and then the poor kid gets the genetics the kid who wants to be the good sports kid turns out to be the genetics of the parent that's not the good sports parent right smith's working on his enthusiasm i'm gonna say it because that is that that's one of those ones where it's like i get yeah all right i know where you're going selena what's going on it's mojo in

the morning hello hi um so i also have swim um kids and just uh recently my senior son i was at his meet recording him for you know memory purposes or whatever and uh i guess in the middle of recording his event i must have switched lanes and started recording some other kid and was freaking out i'm like why is my kid still swimming he miscounted why is he still going he should have been done by now and my husband's like oh yeah he just out touched the other kid i'm like what are you talking about and then i was like oh my god i've been recording the

wrong kid yes and then selena you feel like a creeper because there's people looking at you with a camera recording the entire time right yeah exactly and i'm recording the wrong child i i feel you i don't know swim selena and shannon selena i'll pose this to you because i don't know Shannon will know the answer to this, so I'm just kidding, Shannon. 616 says, Shannon, do they not have scoreboards with their names on it?

Yeah, names and lanes, but this was before the event even started.

Oh, okay.

So it was all the kids just in a group on the pool deck, and I thought it was Smith in a certain spot, and that's who I was aiming at.

My in-laws, when Luke was doing travel baseball, my in-laws sat an entire game, an entire game cheering for kids who were not their grandkids the entire time. Cause they, you know, cause you just have no clue. Like when you go to a baseball field, it's like a bunch of them playing, but what's up, Courtney?

Yes. Hello. Good morning. Good morning, Courtney. I'm here with my daughter, Isabella, driving to school. She wanted me to call and make a comment cause she will never forget when I was cheering for her. She's in competitive dance, eight dances, right? There are so quick changes and so quick. I was like, yes, Isabella. And she's like, mom, that wasn't even me.

Can we talk to Isabella real quick? Can you put Isabella on the phone?

Okay.

Hi.

Hey, Isabella, how embarrassing was that?

Really embarrassing.

But you know that your mom loves you, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

How many practices did mom sit on to not know where you were?

There you go.

a lot where do you go to school isabella i go to school at kingsbury country day

we love you thanks for listening to us thanks for getting your mom to listen to we love you take care of yourself bye courtney we'll see you take care of yourself all right bye appreciate it oh my god those are funny you want to know what's so funny too is all these swimmers like this is a

thing that they write on each other's bodies with sharpie like they write like eat my bubbles or words of affirmation or they write what events they're in okay well after the fact i realized that smith had wanted lucy to write like eat my bubbles on his back or something which is what they all write and instead she wrote poop so i could have just chewed for the kid that had poop

and known it was him lucy's my kind of sibling this by the way is a funny one caitlin the biggest moment that your kid has their graduation and what happened so it was my younger brother and

he was graduating he goes to school in new york city and we were at the graduation ceremony it's like this huge church fair in the city and my mom swore that it was him getting ready to walk across the stage and normally the names are pretty delayed when they're saying them and people walk across so she's zooming in with her phone and taking videos and pictures like a million of them and then this this kid walks by and they look similar and i'm like that's not hunter that's not him and she's standing up and cheering and there's people looking at her like she's not and then they say the name it wasn't him he was like 30 people behind Oh, my gosh.

That kid, though, got a lot of cheers, which is kind of cool, right?

Except his family was sitting, like, in the same row as him. It's the second date update on Mojo in the Morning.

Why are you not getting a call back after you went on a date? We're going to find out this morning here with the second date update. Darren is on with us right now. Darren, how you doing?

Hey, how's it going?

Good. So, Darren, you guys had been talking for a little bit, and then you guys decided that you were going to go out. Where did you guys meet? Yeah.

Well, we met at a concert a while back, and we randomly added each other on Snap, and it's just been going on Snap, story on story. So I split up on her story a while back, and just like that, we started hooking up.

Now, you haven't really gone out on a date date, but what have you guys been doing?

I mean, for the last couple of months, we hooked up on and off, but yeah, no real dates. but we went out for food I think twice and every time she comes she always stays

the night. Oh she stays at your place okay alright and what is it that you think is going on and why she's not calling you back or not returning any of your snaps?

I get this vibe that something's changed since the last time we hung out she hasn't talked to me and it's been a month and on Snap Yeah, she's just seen my story, but she's not giving me any likes, no replies, not sending me anything. It's kind of just gone quiet, you know?

All right, we're going to find out what's going on. She's on the phone with us. She agreed to go on the air with us. Lainey, welcome to the Mojo in the Morning Show. Lainey, will you say hello to Darren?

Hey, what's up?

Hey, how are you?

I'm good. How are you?

i've been good i've been good just snapping just snapping uh darren uh just i mean you can ask you can ask the question say hey what's going on with uh maybe i'll ask for him uh laney what's going on why are you for the last month a little distant with darren um yeah i mean i think he's he's like

cool uh i just think that maybe you know we're probably just not like right for each other and And I just, I don't want to be mean. So I just, you know, I just think I'll leave it at that.

So correct me if I'm wrong. You've been to his house a few times. You all have slept together, right? Yes. So did something happen at his house one day? Or how do you sleep with somebody and then all of a sudden realize that they're not for you?

Yeah, I think I'm just not, like, as attracted to him as I used to be. um i don't want to be mean uh i think that it's like it's like i just think that when i leave the house i feel like kind of like just a little like crusty like a little wait she said crusty

yeah she did you feel crusty why what do you mean by that like the the morning walk of shame when

you leave the house and you're in your sweats and heels yeah but it's not that it's more that like i don't want to be mean i really don't want to be mean are you okay darren if she tells you what

what her feelings are about this without it hurting your feelings yeah i'm fine i gotta know

okay um the last time that we hooked up i just kind of noticed like the sheets just like didn't look that clean so i asked him like hey like when is the last time you washed your sheet And he literally said never. And I just, I don't know. Like, there was just something about that that, like, really grossed me out. And I just kind of, I just, I can't.

It's just not for me. Darren, you never wash your sheets.

Hey, in my defense, I don't know anybody who washes their sheets.

Bro, everybody washes their sheets.

Once a week. Not Krusty washes their sheets. Once a week.

Darren, Darren, my, uh. Once a week? Yes. Yes. Darren, my wife, and Kev's girl, Shirella, are here. Chelsea, once a week, at least, you should wash your sheets or something. Yes. But how often do you think that your boys, including me, would wash the sheets if it wasn't that you're washing the sheets?

Well, I don't know. I think I've trained the boys very well.

Wait, you think that Joe.

Luke at Michigan State. No, he would bring them home for me to wash. but once a week.

I don't know, bro. I'm going to be honest with you. Cherelle, I don't think I've ever personally washed the sheets.

No, you haven't.

That's interesting.

Cherelle, when you...

I think I'm actually a clean person. This is the first time I've ever heard once a week washing the sheets. I vacuum. I clean up after myself. I'm not a flop.

Is his place messy or is it not?

It's not, like, messy at first glance. But then I guess, like, when you start looking at it, It's, like, not clean. You need to smell your sheets.

When you started dating Kev, Cherelle, did his sheets ever smell like they were washed?

Yeah, I don't think I've ever smelled any. I don't stink.

You don't stink? You don't sweat at all?

Your nose blind. You've become nose blind to the stench.

KP, have you ever stayed at a boy's place and a boy's sheet smelled uncleanly?

Yes. Yes. And it was a turnoff because you feel like you're sleeping in his dandruff. I'm getting chills just thinking about that. And it's such a turnoff because what else is he not cleaning? like what what what he doesn't even have soap in his shower like what how do you know that him not like are you not gonna are you gonna get a disease when he touches you you already slept with him no it can't get worse than that if you was gonna get it i never said i slept with him i said i slept in

his bed i'm talking about old girl how about this girl hey yeah darren how about uh your bath towels and stuff like that the bath towel that you take showers with how often do you change that up

Yeah, I do that like a week. Like, that's just regular, that's just laundry. I do laundry.

But why don't you put your sheets in there?

I've never heard anything about the sheets. I mean, if she said, you said anything about, like, me, you know, changing sheets, I would have just ordered a new package and just throw them out.

Like, carry out silverware, right?

It doesn't get more clean than new.

Ashley, what's happening?

Good morning.

Good morning. What do you think about this, that Lainey's not calling Darren back because he never washes his sheets?

Because he's nasty. That's disgusting. Nasty. I called it before I heard her say what was going on. I said, he thinks something's wrong. Something's wrong in the bedroom. The sheets are nasty. That means that your mama was always washing your sheets and always doing your laundry. If you do not know that you need to be washing your sheets.

He doesn't even buy or he doesn't wash your sheets. He buys new sheets when he gets to change his sheets. And by the way, shouldn't you wash those sheets?

Yes, before you put them on your bed.

Roy, what's up? It's Mojo in the morning. What do you want to say to this?

Yes, I'm appalled. The question is, I'm a guy. I wash my sheets at least once a week. But the big question is, if he doesn't wash his sheets, how often does he shower and how often does he change his underwear?

What's going on with the undies? Are you doing anything with those there?

I mean, I do my laundry. Like, I'm not throwing out my underwear and buying that new.

Yeah. Do you have, like, a lot of laundry that's just kind of all over the place?

No, it's just every week. I just don't include sheets.

You need to start including sheets.

You know what you need? You need a mom. You need a mom. I'm lending you my wife, Chelsea. She's a mom of boys.

We have a boot camp.

What's up? Listener Chelsea, what did you want to say?

I was just going to say that my ex, he would only wash his bedding like once a year because his sheets were a little, you know, and so I was like, how often do you wash your bedding? He said, once a year. And I also found out that he's been using the same Sonicare toothbrush head since high school. Oh! Oh, my God! Oh, my gosh! He thought I got his toothbrushes for Christmas.

And you're making out with that guy, you realize? Oh, my God. Yeah. By the way, I'm assuming that if you're having a beautiful lady like Laney in your bed, that you get a little messy in the bed, too. Do you realize that you're, you know, laying down in that?

Oh, yeah. I mean, this is the first time I've ever been called that. Do you ever bring... I thought everything smelled on point where we were tipped out.

Did you ever bring any other girls into that bed? because now I'm going to make Lainey even more disgusted.

Yeah. It's like, but that was like a few sheets ago. That was a few sheets ago.

You said it was like a few sheets ago. Damn.

Danielle, what's going on?

Damn.

Oh, hold on a second, Danielle. We got a weird phone. Say that again.

I just wanted to tell you guys that I used to date a guy whose roommate used to clean his bedsheets for him.

Because his sheets were that bad, his roommate had to do all the cleaning.

Yeah, his roommate was a clean freak, so he would not clean anything. His roommate would do his laundry, strip his bed, clean his bedsheets, do everything for him. I wouldn't clean either.

By the way, would he take on Darren and help Darren out here? Texters are texting in, and this is going to gross you out to know that these are our guy listeners. Texters are saying, I clean my sheets once a month. There's nothing wrong with that. And then a couple other people that are texting here saying twice a month is okay. Every other week is all right with your sheets.

Once a week.

And that's, by the way, words of my wife saying that. I actually hate when our sheets.

get clean why it's the best night chelsea every friday friday is sheet day chelsea makes the bed

so tight i can't even get into the damn thing she got the hotel oh my god i tuck it in with a spatula and i make sure it's like really tight it's the weirdest quarter off my bed baby and i and i also hate that she's got 8 000 pillows all over the bed i'm like why do we need all these pillows all over the place um all right guys the second date update this is the home of the dirty of the 30

throwback throwdown second date update and war of the roses this is mojo in the morning all right

it is mojo in the morning it is time now to grant a breaking and entering christmas wish we go live to kp who is out on the streets this morning with a very sad story about the loss of a husband and a father hi kp hi guys good morning kp good morning to uh our buddy jack Is Jack out there with you? It's right there. What's up, brother? It's good to talk to you again, man. Oh, same here. What a great friend. I mean, this is, you know, a wish that kind of reminds me of our relationship we all have where we all talk to each other every single day. We kind of feel like we get to know each other and our family so much because we all talk about our stories all the time. Jack, you and John would tell so many different stories, and he talked about his boys like crazy, didn't he?

Yes, he did. He was a very, you know, so proud of his boys. You know, they're wonderful kids. I can't say enough about how he felt about his kids.

And you guys would also talk a little sports, too. He was a huge Spartan fan as well as a big Lions fan. And this is such a tragedy that he leaves behind this beautiful woman to now have to try to figure out how to pick up the pieces for this family. We're going to grant a Christmas wish for them. So, KP, you and Jack, you guys stay right there and then get ready to bust into home, okay?

All right, let's do it.

All right, breaking and entering Christmas Wish. Lydia's going to be dialing up. Let's make it up. Let me actually stay right here.

Yeah.

Hi, Carrie? Hello? Hi, Carrie. It's Mojo from Mojo in the Morning Show. I'm calling you bright and early. I know you're like, okay, so what is going on here? Why are you calling me? I'm calling you because we received a letter here to our show for our Mojo in the Morning Breaking and Entering Christmas Wish program from one of John's coworkers.

Okay.

And we just wanted to let you know, first off, we're very, very sorry for your loss, but I'm going to have him read you this letter, okay?

Okay. Hey, Mojo in the Morning. My name is Jack. I have listened to you for 23 years and have heard all the wonderful Christmas wishes that you have granted. I am asking that you consider my co-worker and good friend John and his family for this year's breaking and entering Christmas wish. John became ill about a week and a half before Thanksgiving. He did return to work three days before the holiday, but left because he still didn't feel well. John ended up passing away the day before Thanksgiving, leaving behind his wife, Carrie, and their two sons. John and I would hang out together and talk sports and family. He loved bowling, was a big fan of the Spartans, and, of course, the Lions. He loved his family so much and was especially proud of his boys. John had one more year until he was able to retire, but with this sudden tragedy, it has left Carrie and the boys with no income, which means no Christmas. Mojo, if you could find a way to grant this family's Christmas wish, I know they would greatly appreciate it, along with myself. Sincerely, Jack Craig.

And check out some beautiful letter, buddy. Carrie, I'm so sorry.

Oh, I cannot imagine. Thank you.

Carrie, John was a hardworking guy, and he loved you, and he loved your boys so much. i know this call comes at a time probably where you're getting ready for the holidays and after this loss it's very very hard for you to try to figure out how you're gonna stay strong for these boys well we want you to know that we're praying for you we're caring for you and we want to make sure that there's one less thing that you have to worry about and that is where

Christmas is going to come this year, and that's why we're going to grant this wish for Jack in memory of his buddy and your love, John.

Thank you.

We have a little bit of a surprise for you. That's a pretty big surprise. Yeah. We're going to do it now, if you don't mind. I know the phone call comes in as a surprise, but the phone call also comes with the fact that we're out in front of your home right now. Our KP Are you there? Did I lose KP? I lost Carrie. I know that the phone line sounded like it was... There you are. Okay, you're there.

We had her in the corner for her to see. Okay.

KP, stop for one second. Lydia, dial KP's phone back because it sounds like crap on our thing here. yeah we're gonna doubt we're gonna dial you back because it's got a little bit of a static issue so dial it on another line here we're gonna call you right back and we're gonna get right there back with them you do live radio you get live things happening i will say you can watch on facebook live there you go all right now you're back kp and it's a much better line hi hi so carrie's going to grab

The boy, she's waking him up right now to surprise him. Here they are.

What's up, guys?

Hi, guys.

Good morning.

Morning. Oh, I like your shirt. Look over here.

We got John and Jackson.

This is all for you.

John and Jackson are 12 and 8 years old. And John, by the way, named after his dad. He's the third now in the family.

And he just walked out on another porch

Which is completely filled Completely covered Not a spot to see on the ground

Hey Carrie

Oh my goodness

This is all for you Carrie This is all so that You know that we're remembering John And all the beautiful things That John has done for so many other people We're repaying for those And we want you to know We're all going to be here for you

Thank you.

Carrie.

I know this is overwhelming.

I couldn't imagine this happening. I couldn't imagine it happening, of course, at the holiday time. How are you doing, Carrie?

I'm hanging in there.

Yeah.

Day by day, that's all I can do.

Yeah.

To see those boys right now, I'm watching on Facebook Live, and they are so excited and smiling, and that has to make your heart so happy.

It does. It really does.

Can you tell our listeners and all of us about John and what kind of guy he was? We heard from Jack that he was an amazing guy to work with.

He was generous to his fault. If he could help others, he was there to help. I mean, he had kids later in life. He just adored them.

How did you guys meet?

Oh, God. It was 20-some years ago. We met at a bar.

He swept you off your feet, didn't he?

Yeah.

What were the holidays like for you guys? What did you guys do during the holidays?

with friends um with our families oh oh my god i can understand why you spend it with friends when they care about you so much to reach out to us to make sure that you were taken care of this year like this is a very solid group of people that just care about you so much and care and carry

in some way and i don't know if you feel this or not but i feel it in some way i feel like this is

your husband saying Merry Christmas and in some way spotlighting this letter so that we see it and read it and choose it yeah speaking for his friends he's right on that porch with you right

there with your boys you're not celebrating Christmas without him no we're not not at all

oh my goodness Carrie we heard so much about you and one of the things we heard is that you give to those boys everything and that's why we're going to give to them everything that they've wanted i mean we got tons of gifts i mean people can see it on our videos we understand that the kids and their dad used to love sports so we got a fun planning of things for you guys a bunch of lion stuff our our friends from the detroit tigers want your boys to be there at opening day for the tigers

this upcoming season. So we're going to make that happen.

That would be a great memory for you.

We heard that...

That was cool. You know, we've come to say this year we wanted to take him to the Tigers game. He kept telling me we were going to go and we just kept putting it off and putting it off and then this happened and oh my gosh.

Well, we heard that dad was a huge Tigers fan so we wanted to make sure of that. And then we also heard that you guys were wanting to do some kind of a family vacation and sometimes getting away is the best way to help you get through some of these times and we've got a special trip planned for you.

Yeah, we are, you guys are headed to Great Wolf Lodge and every single expense is going to be totally covered for you, okay? We've got Kroger gift cards to make sure that kitchen is full for the holidays. We've got gas cards for you. We're treating you to a spa day because we know that every mom could use that And we are writing you a big check, okay, to make sure that you don't have to worry during the holiday.

Thank you so much. Oh, my gosh.

And, I mean, those gifts are everything from furniture that we heard you needed to warm clothes to Nintendo Switches and PS5s. And we know you love to light your fireplace. So Lydia hooked you up with so much firewood. You are never going to need firewood again. Thank you.

We even have some furniture for you that we're going to provide because we heard that there was some furniture that you had wanted to buy. We want to make sure you have somewhere comfy for you and the boys to lay on and watch Christmas movies. But one of the things that we heard that to us as a show we could not let go by, we had heard that you do love that fireplace, But sometimes you run that fireplace because you want to offset the expense of turning your heat on at home.

Yes.

And we don't want that to happen. When it's cold outside, a fireplace is not going to be warm enough for you. And that's why we're giving you money to help you with your heating bills. Turn that heat on and keep your home warm. I know your hearts are warm with love. But now it's time to keep that home warm, okay?

Okay. Thank you.

That is not a wish. That is a demand.

All right?

We're demanding that you do that.

I will. I will.

Carrie, our prayers for you, and know this, that John is always going to be with you in the voice.

Yes. Yes, he will. He will. And I have lots of people remind me all the time.

Merry Christmas.

Thank you. Merry Christmas. Go inside and get warm and enjoy those gifts with those adorable little boys.

Thank you.

KP, let's make it festive and fun. Let's have a good time. These guys look like they're going to have some fun with these gifts.

Can we say Merry Christmas on the count of three? One, two, three. Merry Christmas.

I'm a little angry right now. I'm a little salty. I'm a little upset. I'm actually, hold on a second here. I'm smelling it because I still smell it for some reason. I think it's on this coat. I just bought this coat, by the way.

I know. I like that coat, and it's not black.

I bought this. I went to Von Mar. Blue. All right, so I have been smelling weed since I valet parked yesterday at the mall.

That was you? I can smell this.

I thought that was Zach. So I valet parked my car, and I'm going to never do it again, but I'm going to call this out, okay? the guys who are valet guys first off everybody smells like weed these days like i smell weed at intersections you know what i mean i'm like what the hell why why does it smell so bad and um i was wanting to run into the mall really quick because i had a busy day yesterday i had to go to the orthodontist to go see dr reynolds at reynolds orthodontics and then i had to drive to east lansing yesterday and so i'm like all right i'm gonna go to the mall and i couldn't find a spot for some reason it was really busy and so i'm like you know what i'm in a valet park so i can get in and out and just do it really quick i give the guy at the valet you know my keys and he gives me the ticket i walk inside everything's good smell nothing when i get my car back willie nelson brings the freaking thing to me you know and i'm sitting there i'm sitting there like what in the hell it smelled so bad and i don't know that you've ever had this happen to you before your car gets dirty or you spill something or so bad you can't concentrate on anything else other than getting a fix i had to go immediately to a car wash and and i went immediately to the car wash and i never asked them to put a scent in my car i actually said to them i go

Can you do me a favor? Do you have anything you can spray in this car just to get rid of this thing? And the guy put like a stripper scent or something in there. I think I smelled vanilla or something. That's worse. Honestly, it's better than the weed smell, though. The weed smell, Shannon, was so bad. I know. And I have to be quite honest with you. I don't know if I could ever valet park a car again without saying, I want all you guys to come around here and I'm going to sniff you.

Was it on the same level as like rotten milk in your car? You ever get rotten milk in your car?

Mike, I'd rather have rotten milk because at least people would say, well, you got rotten milk. Listen, I'm not a person that is against legalizing marijuana. Sounds like it. I just feel like you can edible and be just as fun. Or vape. You know, it doesn't smell as bad. This dude has got a freaking bong going on in that little valet room, that little house that they live in.

So am I the crazy person that loves it? Like, I buy patchouli-scented things.

I like the smell.

I love the scent of weed. Really? I think it feels so good.

I'd rather smell cigar smell or I'd rather smell it.

I will say this.

Not all weed smell is made equally.

I like cigar. Yeah. Sometimes. That candlelight got you a cigar scented. Like, it doesn't smell like cigar. But I know that that's the scent. But yeah, that's a good smell.

I'm going to go on record to say this to you guys. I'm going to go on record to say that this is now the most annoying thing about going to a valet. It used to be the most annoying thing was they changed my settings in my car or changed my, you know, radio station. I'd come up, you know, I've had that before where smart asses put on, you know, 96.3 DVD. Yeah. And I'm listening to freaking, you know, Michael Bolton or something like that. But now the smell, it was, oh, it was just awful.

They have to change. I rarely valet, but when I do, I love watching the guys try to get in my front seat. Because it is all the way forward and all the way up. And so it's like a conundrum every time where they're trying to figure out, what? And they have to move everything back.

That should be the only thing you touch in my car when you're valeting. You're not in there long enough to need to change the radio to get your vibe right before you park my car. Change the seat so that you're comfortable enough to do your job, but don't touch anything else.

Yeah, you know what? And if you have to, you try to, like, mark it or something so that you know exactly where it's supposed to be.

And definitely don't fire up in my car either.

Yeah, that's what I think he was doing.

If you smell it that bad, he had to be smoking in the car.

I think the guy, honestly, what he did was he wanted a little break. He was going on his 10-minute break, and he said, oh, I'm just going to go into this car. and he sat in the corner parking lot probably in the only parking spot that was there when I was trying to go there and he basically hung out with Willie and Woody Harrelson all hanging out together in that thing smoking a reefer I feel like that is my hold on where is that since we're talking drops smoking the reefer look at this the guy who if he wasn't a garbage man would probably be a valet Dank is on with us right now. What's up, Dank? Smoke weed every day. Yay, Dank. Dank, come on, man. Now, let me ask you. When you're picking up garbage, you're picking up Shannon's garbage, do you leave that smell in her driveway?

No, no, no. I don't smoke at work.

Yeah, okay. I smoke a lot at work. Smoke outside at work. Dank, your thoughts about this here. What are your thoughts about the fact that my jacket now smells like weed?

That's the problem with smoking. You can't get rid of the smell.

Yeah.

A lot of people like edibles, but smoking and taking an edible are way two different highs. Smoking gets you a head high. Edible gets you a body high. But if I'm around my family, I can't really be smelling like it, so I'd be taking the edibles.

Tank, do you have certain jackets or jeans or articles of clothing that you will purposely wear if you know you're going to smoke because they're going to smell forever?

Oh, yeah, 100%. 100%. I only wear, like, if I'm going out, if I know I'm going to do people smoking. Yeah.

You know what you wear?

I don't want my other clothes, too.

You have to wear, like, you know how when you go work out, you wear, like, clothing that has, like, spandexy. Moisture wicking. Yeah, maybe that's what you wear. You don't wear wool sweaters. You'll never get a wool sweater.

Well, that's like cigars. They have smoking jackets, right? That's true. Is that why they have a smoking jacket? I thought it was super loose.

No, no, I think it's supposed to take out the smell.

I used to have a smoking hoodie.

Did you really?

Yeah, like when Shannon said, do you wear something? I used to have the same hoodie that I was smoking.

Every single time? Poncho on with us right now. Hi, Poncho.

Morning.

Good morning, buddy. How are you?

Not too bad. Just got to my delivery area here.

Oh, okay. And, uh, uh, Poncho, uh, what do you think? I talked about this before numerous times about the smell of the weed has gotten even bigger, uh, since they legalized marijuana in our state. But, uh, I never knew that I was going to not be able to valet park a car.

It definitely sucks, especially when you're Ubering and you pick up somebody who reeks of weed. and it sits in your car for like the next 10 people and you can't get rid of the smell.

And they think you're the one, right?

Yep.

Yeah. How often does that happen? I bet it happens often.

At least once every weekend.

Yeah. Yeah, it's wild.

There's got to be a head shop with some sort of like Febreze for weed that like eliminates the odor.

And if somebody hasn't come up with that yet,

it needs to be made.

Or why don't they actually make weed smell like Febreze?

That's true.

You know, like have that happen, too.

Are there head shops here?

What is a head shop? Because I want to go there.

I don't even know how to properly describe them. Other than in Toledo, there's like two big ones, Lunar Station and the Headshed.

They sell like rolling papers and things like that, right?

And stuff like that. Like Glassman is how they always... Yeah.

That's not what I thought that was. Yeah. No, they haven't. I think there's one reason I saw it off Greenfield, but I... I need an endorsement.

I had one for a long time Me and Mike are talking about something else

They don't have a back room by the way They're 16 I know It's crazy Let me go back to playing gay drops Big day for gay stuff Mojo in the morning Home of The War of the Roses Five lies tell your mom throwback throwdown second date update the dirty on the 30 and a whole bunch of fools that all work here on the iheart radio app or wherever you are listening to us thank you so much if you're on a radio hopefully you're listening to us on either channel 955 104.5 snx or 92.5 kiss fm if we're not on that radio station but something else tell us because they're not supposed to be carrying this radio show and they're probably getting it for free that's called pirate radio radio right

there um all right kevin how are you doing there kevin i'm chilling honestly i'm a little tired i just looked at my face in this camera i was like damn bro you can see it on my face you can see it right there i got the ugly face on today um don't do that megan i think that face looks

beautiful today i think you look good you look fantastic with me megan i'm loaded i'm sorry i'm so sorry what uh kevin do you believe in hexes nah you don't believe in you don't believe i do

believe in you can well it's interesting i don't know because i believe that we have the ability to speak things into existence like manifesting yeah you believe the opposite i believe in the power of of i believe in the bible there's power life and death is in the tongue power of prayer Power of prayer. So if, you know, with that mentality, and I'm also reading the four agreements right now, and I'm not at the first agreement yet, but it's something about being peccable with your words. So maybe, I guess.

If you believe in the good of that, there could be the bad of that.

That's why I'm kind of like split right now.

Can somebody put a hex on you?

Man, I hope not. Here's the situation, though. I was in my mom's hood yesterday or the day before. She lived like in the Oak Park area. I'm 696. She doesn't, but that's where the Little Caesars is that I was at. So I popped in Little Caesars real quick. I love Jets. I used to be a hungry Howie's daddy. Then I switched over to Jets, and I was cheating on Jets a little bit because when you want the crazy bear from Little Caesars, you want the crazy bear from Little Caesars. Yes. So I popped in Little Caesars, and I was, you know, feeling jovial, feeling great. The vibrations were at an all-time high. The pockets were a little thick. And when you're paying $6, you can splurge a little bit. So I see the lady behind me. I'm like, hey, ring her up, too. She on my bill. You know what I mean? Get her a little pizza. Aw, that's so nice.

You're very paying it forward. Was she buying for, like, her whole office?

No, no, no.

She was like, oh, thank you.

She just got a little pizza. She got a little pizza. But after I bought her a pizza, she was very appreciative. She was like, oh, my God, thank you so much. Da, da, da, da, da. But I believe she had some type of, I don't know. I don't want to say spiritual awareness, but I believe she was like a reader, like a prophetic individual. She was like had psychic ability. Exactly. So, I mean, the only reason I can say that is because first she said, can I pray for you? And I was like, sure. Like, pray for me. I love when people say that. You know what I mean? I'm like, bet. Like.

Let's pray. Let's do this. She prayed for me. And then she opened her eyes, and we were looking at each other. And she was like, somebody has put a hex on you. I removed the hex. She literally said these words. She was like, somebody has put a hex on you. Somebody has cast demons on you, cast words over you. I think it's Megan. I think it's Megan.

It was me. Sorry. What? How did you respond? I would be freaking out.

My mouth was just closed. My mouth was open, but I didn't say anything. I was just like.

I'm honestly so glad you brought this up because if she removed it, I will place it back on you.

Okay. So she said that the person put a hex on you and because you bought her crazy bread.

Who knew? Or a little pizza.

A little pizza. Man, this is...

That's six bucks you ever spent.

Listen, that's what I'm saying. Without that, who knows where I would be this morning.

Can you just think a hex away, though? I feel like you'd need to make a potion for that.

I don't know, man. She said she could tell that somebody had put something over me. She's like, somebody has spoken ill over you. I remove a hex over you. That was the energy that I guess I was emitting, that she was receiving the vibration. I don't know what was going on. Do you feel lighter today? I didn't, but then I started thinking, like, damn, who is out here speaking ill on my name? Wow. My steps are ordered, so I'm not even tripping on that.

All it took was for you to go buy this lady something like that, huh?

Has a stranger ever said anything crazy to y'all?

Well, I've had strangers say many things, like F you, buddy. You know what I mean? I've had people that have said crazy stuff like that. But no, like strange like what? I mean, a hex.

I've never had that. a crazy stranger interaction or like this like i don't even know this person i have chelsea

believes in this this stuff like occasionally she'll like tell me that you know she'll talk to uh spiritual people and and i i don't know like i i i always feel get weirded out doing this stuff and having that but i've never had a stranger just randomly come up to me and say

something like uh like that i believe it though for real shout out to grizzly people do pray on your downfall yeah so if you got people you know with your back speaking positive about you i'm on for that and maybe somebody didn't speak ill on me i don't i don't disagree you think so that is really creepy i have goosebumps hey this is a shout out to zach this is a question on our

trivia yesterday oh really well right the hex must have still been on you because you guys

finished sixth out of 17. only one person can win yeah i don't know it's interesting

Can somebody tell that? Do we have any spiritual people right now that can tell us if they know for sure if somebody has a hex put on them?

Or how do you put a hex or a curse on somebody?

What's going on? How you doing, Deontay?

Hey, what's going on, man?

I'm not going to the Little Caesars in Oak Park after this one.

Hey, you never know. That might be the wake-up call, man. Get the hexes off.

That is, right? What do you think about this? What do you think about what happened to Kev?

Man, hey, it's a wake-up experience. Man, thankfully he got the hexes off off you, but I had a crazy guy come up to me when I was working at the airport, right? Crazy. He's got on some jeans with a blazer, though. And I'm like, all right, what's this guy going to do? You know, so he asked a random question. He's like, there's going to be money online. We just brushing them off. The guy's walking to us all the time. He asked the question, and then Bitcoin's out. He tells us to look into it. We missed all the opportunity to find a dollar.

Wow.

It is crazy work. I'm like, man, I wish we could have just, you know, I don't know. There was an opportunity right there. that uh crazy people that walk in city you gotta listen to them you never know it's funny you

trust him because he was in a suit but crazy people can still wear a suit well no you say he didn't trust him oh he didn't trust him oh he should have trusted him oh it was the thong sandals that threw him off though i i think his cell phone had a hex on it what's going on how

you doing crystal hey how are you good what's up hey there crystal's on the phone what's going on Hey, so back in 2014 when I got married, I'm not married anymore, but anyways, my husband and I had went to Amish country, and we were into this antique shop, and there was this cool, small, old box. I collected, like, old antique boxes, and...

And I was showing my friend, I had put it in the bathroom to put some stuff in it. And she was over at the house and she was like, that's possessed. And I'm like, what? She goes, it's evil. You need to get rid of it right now. And so she said, go throw it in a fire pit.

Wow. So she told you to get rid of it because it had a bad thing to it, huh?

Dude, she thought it was ugly. Yeah. Maybe she thought it was ugly But to this day she swears it was possessed So I threw it into the fire pit And burn it And my husband looked at me And he's like what are you doing And I'm like Amy said it's possessed I still can't do the same thing I wouldn't be able to look I don't know No way I would not spend $10 on something And throw it into a fire pit But every time you looked at it You'd feel like My friend is crazy It's a box That's what I would feel.

Officer Z is on with us right now. Are you a police officer?

In training, yeah.

Okay.

When I was on my second shift, we went to this house call, and this lady told me that we're all going to go to hell, and our balls are going to be set on fire.

And you're what?

Your balls are going to be set on fire.

So the lady told you you're going to hell and your balls, I hope you gave her like 12 tickets. Chestnuts roasting.

That's not Hex, that's anger.

That lady's a mean lady. I'd be worried about that. That's kind of crazy. Who would say that to a cop, just randomly say to a cop? Teresa, what's up? It's Mojo in the morning. How you doing?

Hi, Mojo. So I was in the service. I was a chaplain assistant in the Air Force, and so I have always been around people that are spiritual. well we had a volunteer named rose who gave me a random call she used to you know answer phones in the chapel she gave me a call and she's like you need to go pick up your son right now or you'll be in the hospital with him later and i was so mad like i complained to my um the the chaplain i was just furious about it and sure enough at five o'clock in the evening i was in the er with my son he had fallen on the playground and he got six stitches and it turns out that's

That's crazy.

Wow.

I got to tell you this story again because Rose actually is a prophet. And she goes all over the world. And I even remember her telling me about New York burning before September 11th. Wow, Rose. And I was so upset about the things that she would say because they were coming true. And I guess I just didn't trust it. But if Rose called me today and said, hey, Teresa, move, I would move.

You'd pick up and move. Wow. Whoa. Oh, my gosh. That's wild. Where's Rose at? I wonder these days. Lori, what's going on? Kevin bought a lady a pizza, and she took a hex away from him yesterday, so there's some good stuff going on in his life. What's your story?

Well, I had a client call me at work, and, you know, we did a business transaction, whatever it was done, and she said, Lori, I have to tell you, and it was Memorial Day weekend, so it was a long weekend, she said, you need to, she had a strong feeling to call you today, you need to go straight home and you need to lock your doors and on your way home step at every red light. I think, oh my gosh. That scared me all weekend long.

She just had a feeling of this?

Well, she told me she was a psychic medium and she had this premonition or something. She said, I just need you to go home and you go lock your doors when you get home. Don't go anywhere. I'm like, well, it's Memorial Day weekend. I had a lot of

plates. Yeah, I mean, of all thing so you stayed in the house because of this no i know did you have any bad things happen what happened nothing oh oh i was gonna say wouldn't that wouldn't it suck by the way if you stayed indoors all weekend i love that we're disappointed that nothing listen to this one ashley's with us right now wait till you hear who put a hex on her who put a hex on you?

My ex's mom did.

See? What? She didn't like you, huh?

No, she thought I was stealing her son from her, so she put a curse on me.

And has it worked?

I haven't had much luck in the relationship department. Oh, no.

That stinks. Oh, jeez. So she's the reason. You got to go back to her and get her to take that hex off. You got to go, I'm sorry. I don't. Seriously. Or just go to the Little Caesars at Oak Park. No, no, no. You got to, seriously, you got to go right back to your ex's mom, knock on that door, and say, it's me, Ashley. I apologize. I won't ever touch your son again, but take, you know, put some mystery dust over on me, okay?

Yes, exactly.

All right, good luck to you on this one.

Why can't one of these people go?

Fall in and tell us our future on the air.

I don't believe it. I don't want it. I don't even want it at all.

So you believe that a woman took a heads off of you and was like crazy bread?

I didn't say I believed it. I'm not playing with that stuff, right?

We're some crazy bread. But you don't believe somebody?

I'm not doing that. I'm honestly all in here.

Let's be honest. Without Friday, we wouldn't need them. Time to look for a good plan B, buddy.

Hey, come on.

It's Mojo in the Morning. We'll find the thing.

Sweet.

Wait, five lies to tell your mom.

Jacqueline, how are you?

Hey, I'm great, Mojo. How are you?

Fantastic. It's five lies to tell your mom. Jacqueline, you are awesome because you're willing to let us tell this story, but you're going to call your mom up here. And a little back story, you got scammed by a guy on Tinder for how much money?

$17,000.

Oh, my gosh.

Wow.

And we're going to actually call your mom up and tell her that you got scammed again.

Oh, shoot. She's going to die.

I don't know if I want to get into the weeds on how you got scammed, but...

Oh, I want to know.

Yeah, tell us, please.

It's the Tinder Swindler story. I mean, honest to God, the guy... Excuse me, let me roll. I wouldn't know. The guy love-bombed me from Tinder with all these beautiful pictures. And, you know, it turns out the real guy is a plastic surgeon in Brazil. Really handsome man, married with money. And I found his profile. Like, it popped up. I don't know, the AI on Facebook or whatever showed me his images. So I send them to the guy on Tinder. And he's like, oh, yeah, that's my twin. I'm like, okay, I'm from Detroit, Michigan. We figure this kind of stuff out. And so he convinced me anyways. I still believe them. They have the same belt, you know, Ferragamo belt, the same, you know, everything the same.

Oh, my God. All it takes is a Ferragamo belt, and you can get.

You can get whatever you want.

Yeah. All right, so here we go. We're going to do the lies right now. Lie number one that all the listeners should be listening for when you call your mom is, I think I'm getting married this year. Lie number two.

Say the guy from Tinder said I am perfect.

Lie number three. He's not from here, and we need to get him home. Lie number four.

Say, can you lend me $20,000?

And lie number five, I already sent him $15,000.

Oh, she's going to kill you. She's going to die. She's going to have to leave. I hope she doesn't hang up on me.

Okay?

Well, let's hope before you get at least the fifth lie out. If she hangs up on you after the fifth lie, then you'll still win a prize. We ready?

Yes, I'm so ready.

All right, we're calling your mom up.

Hello? Hey, Mom. Mom, can you hear me? Yeah. Hey, how's it going? Oh, it's going okay. Who am I talking to? It's Jackie. It's me, Mom. Oh, okay. Your voice sounds different on this phone. Yeah, it's a little bit high-pitched because I'm a little nervous, but I'll be fine. Okay. All righty. Yeah, so I called you because, you know, I've been dating, like, these guys online, and I really think I'm going to end up getting married this year. Okay. So, you know, I needed to talk to you about that first. And then, you know, Brandon, the whole situation with him, and then there's Brian and all that. But, you know, Brandon, you know, he keeps telling me that I'm perfect for him and all that stuff. So I don't know if it's going to be him, but I think it could end up being him if he ended up, you know, coming and being real. So, you know, that's that. I don't know your opinion on that. Just take your time. Don't. Don't commit. Okay. The thing is, you know, he's in Cyprus, right? And so, you know, he needs to get home and he keeps asking for money. And, you know, I had already sent him that money. Don't do it. No, but I mean, I had already. I already did. Remember? Do you know, like, back, that's why I have the conservatorship and all that. Don't do it again. Yeah. Yeah, I know. I'm trying my best to control myself, but it's really, really hard. But he's, anyways, he's asking. So I'm just wondering, he needs $20,000 more. Like, I know I have it in my bank, and I know Gaz isn't going to approve it, but I just wanted to, like, get your opinion and stuff. I would never do that. What? Like, you wouldn't personally, like, if I said, hey, mom, can you lend me $20,000 to send him, you wouldn't? Not him. No. Why? What if he's real? What if he's not? This happens to you a lot. People through the Internet are not real. Until you meet their base to faith and get to know them, then you know if they're real or not.

i mean that's how i feel too but i'm kind of i'm not desperate but you know i'm gonna be 50 so i just feel like i want to get married yeah don't do something that you will regret okay yeah i know i know what you mean i just i really i really do love him though i have like special feelings for him i've been talking about for like eight months i have not face-to-face met him to see the real him don't know jackie i i thought i thought you were gonna be more supportive but i understand your point like you don't hello mamacita mom is this is this

jacqueline's mom yes hi it's brandon oh hi brandon how are you i'm wearing my ferragamo belt and looking stylish and wonderful today well that's good i love your daughter i i i hope so she needs she needs someone real i need somebody real too and i need somebody that has really good money i need a little bit of money from you mom just to get over and then once we get over and establish ourselves we will be wonderful together well if you love her you make your way and and show her what you have to offer as a man and as a person jacqueline tell her how much money we want to know

if she'd lend us uh we're he's we're trying to get uh 20 000 sorry so he can have enough because he's got to pay off that debt and stuff so that's kind of remember when i said about the financing stuff, it's really, like, that's what I'm trying to do is get a loan for that. But, you know, I ain't got no money, so you can't buy anything from me.

$20,000 gets you a son-in-law,

mom. Yeah, I'm struggling. You might even be able to date his dad. His dad's available. Yes.

Hold on. His dad is right here. Say hello to his dad. Hi. Mama. Mama, you there?

Anyway. Mama,

I know he heard you. That's my dad. Hi, Dad. Brandon, why does she not speak to me? I don't know. I think she's nervous. You know, American women are...

Yeah, well, and she also, her husband passed away, my dad, so she's probably a little sensitive, you know?

God rest his soul.

Yeah, same on. Yeah. He was one of a kind, and trying to get over him has been extremely hard.

Well, you know, the best way to get over someone is under another. Right?

I don't know if I want to hear my dad talking about that. He's a nice man. I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to put you on the spot. No, I'm sure, but something like that, you've got to forewarn me. Honestly, I did not know that was going to happen. I'm going to be honest with you. I really didn't expect that.

Mom, mom, hold on a second. Jacqueline's got one last thing to tell you, and it's going to be the best thing about this entire thing that we're dealing with right now.

hey mom this is mojo in the morning it's a phone it's like a five lies to tell your mom so it's all lies okay so so you can relax now i mean i would love to hook you up with his dad still i did not send him i did not send him money i'm not gonna get a loan i'm not doing any of that yes he's in cyprus all that other stuff is true and marriage and all that but that'll come in due time if he does his part. Yeah. In time. I'll pay you some time, sweetheart. There's other good news, too. I think Mojo's going to tell you.

Mom, hi. This is Mojo, not Brandon.

You've got tricks, Mom.

Mom, we want to tell you that you just won a prize. Your daughter had you on Five Lies. We're going to set you up with a nice prize.

You're going to what?

We're going to give you a nice prize.

Oh, really?

Yes.

And it's not going to cost you anything. You could use that, right? I could use it. Yes, I could. Yeah, you need something good in your life. I do. I love you so much, Mom. Thank you for being understanding and not hanging up on me before I get the Five Lies. Okay, honey.

The biggest thing that we're going to do is we're going to take your daughter, your almost 50-year-old daughter, and we're going to school her on not talking to guys online from other countries.

There you go. There's a blessing right there.

Maybe she needs to go and meet guys at, like, I don't know, church or something. I don't know.

Yes. Yes, I do go to church now. I've warned her and warned her about the meeting people online. It's just, you don't really know who you're talking to. Oh, my gosh. You really don't.

By the way, you might have the sweetest. mom in the world listen to this lady she absolutely is i give her a hard time and i have in the past and she always forgives me and she's always there for me every time i i fall janet i got a quick

question for you do you know betty white that's all i want oh yeah no doesn't she sound like she

could actually hang out with betty white she's sweet like her too she's like a sweet and she's She's got white hair now. My dad used to color her hair, and she hasn't colored it.

Oh, my goodness. Can that be one of the prizes?

Do you want your hair colored?

We'll get your hair colored.

Yeah, to get her at Spa Day, she needs that. And she's never been to a hair salon, so she always cuts her own hair. And, like, something like that would be beautiful.

Mom, I want to date you, Mom. What are you doing?

It's Mojo in the Morning. Five lies to tell your mother.

It's time for more Mojo. Mojo in the morning.

Mojo in the morning. Phone number is 844-MOJO-LIVE. 844-665-6548. Text 95500. If you do text us, do us a favor. Pick up your phone if we call or you have an out-of-area number that calls you because Lydia wants to get you on the air with us. And she gets very angry if you don't pick up your phone. I don't know. I thought that was Kevin. Was that nice? That's usually Kevin. That was scary. What is it? You should have heard, by the way, when you were off for a couple days, the girls were making fun of you. They were mocking you by doing the imitation of what you do when somebody doesn't answer. They're like, Marlena.

He says mocking as a negative derogatory thing. I was paying homage. Do it real quick. We were talking about your feet, too.

That was mocking. That's not surprising. Well, how did that come up in conversation? Shannon.

Actually, it wasn't me that brought it up, but I did say, have y'all kissed me? It was, what's the grossest thing you think you can experience on this planet? We were like, have feet. No, what it really was was Mojo was talking about gross people on planes taking their shoes off. He said, you seem like the person you would kind of be, and

we agreed. I was saying, could you imagine him taking his shoes off and having to see those?

He's going to try to stay us under the bus, but I brought the receipt.

I still think you need to go to the doctor. Who needs enemies when you got friends like you guys?

That's right, baby.

Alright, so I was I was having a discussion, and the discussion was with my wife, and we were discussing what is the best substance to have before having sex. Actually, to be honest with you, she wasn't having a discussion with me. I was just telling her my favorite. She's like, why are we talking about this? She did not want to talk about it. But I said to her that, and you tell me what your thoughts are on this. I said to her that I think high sex is way better than drunk sex, and the reason why I think that high sex is better is it slows things down a little bit, where drunk sex, it almost races things up. Also, you get sick with drunk sex. You know what I mean? You can have so much to drink that you get nauseous. But the only good thing about drunk sex is when you get the whiskey D or the whiskey weenie as a guy. And my whiskey weenie is a little bit different than most guys' whiskey weenie. Some guys say that they get whiskey weenie where they can't perform. I actually perform as if I took a Cialis or a... Oh, really? Oh, yeah. For some reason, it changes me where it where it makes it seem like a a longer game of of, I don't know, pickleball, you know, but but I wanted to throw this out there as a discussion and ask the question of the people that listen to this radio program who I know don't ever partake in any kind of drugs. we actually have the highest highest listening audience you know in the Nielsen ratings we came out number one amongst people who are stoned non-stop that might be the reason why the ratings are so good

you are high as a f***ing kite

because you guys are active participants of other forms of things that cause you to get crazy and listen to the show for long periods of time You don't realize how long.

long you're listening um what is better high sex or drunk sex go uh 844 mojo live 844-665-6548

is our telephone number what are your thoughts it's not even close what's that what's your answer it's not it's literally not even if you say drunk sex i am assuming you've never had high sex

because they're not comparable is it that the senses are oh so much heightened it's better

everything's more sensitive everything's more focused when you're drunk you're just sloppy and you're just two like wet fishes flopping around and when you're just like i'm supposed to be doing this because we went out tonight and when you have high sex it's like i'm going to make this the most sensational feeling in the end i like that i haven't had that much high sex um to

be completely honest with you so i can't really give a case as to why that is better i can see for all the reasons that Megan listed why it would make sense, but there is something about going out and having a fun night of drinking and having sex drunk. And that whiskey weenie, the hitty D?

No girl likes that. But here's where I will say drunk sex has a benefit is that less inhibitions. You might be more willing to do something you normally do than you, which could be fun, but as a girl,

I don't want the whiskey.

I want the whiskey.

Question. Wait, wait, wait.

Jesus. Megan, go back to something.

Go back to what is the whole story about no girl wants to have sex last longer?

Yeah.

Why?

Because it's not the same for us as it is for you. You're probably not even making it feel good, and this is all about you right now. Really? And now it's taking longer. Are you talking about drunk sex? Yeah.

No, she's talking about having sex in general. No, it lasts longer. She doesn't like long sex.

Nobody likes whiskey D sex because you're focused on you in that moment. You can't even keep it going.

I very much agree with that. I believe her, too. I've been in situations where you can tell she was like, okay. Sometimes you're like, how's this? This is going a little too long.

I'm happy for you, but like, wrap it up.

Let's go. And then whiskey D, it's not as pleasurable even for us. No. To be honest with you, because you just like can't really feel it for real for us.

All right. high sex or drunk sex what's up jen how you doing i'm blessed thank you um so i used to think the

same thing but then i did it on shrooms and just game changer really so yeah doing it on shrooms

what does it do does it make you feel like you're not even having sex no you're absolutely having

sex you're just so friendly and you love everybody like you just you don't care and it's just it's great it's like ecstasy can i admit something and then i i feel like everybody

is talking about you don't laugh at me and doing shrooms you guys please somebody please educate me do you sniff them you eat them you eat them okay you can even

I just really don't.

A lot of times, do you do gummy shrooms?

No, actual shrooms.

Okay, because a friend of mine has been into gummy shrooms lately and said that the gummy shrooms are amazing.

Shroom coffee is amazing. I need to try those.

Shroom coffee? But see, is that the same kind of shroom? Like, I have those little saints drinks in my fridge. I don't think it's the same kind of... I think it's just in my drink.

Kevin, we're doing a survey here. High sex or drunk sex?

Definitely high sex. If you want to have the best sex ever, take ecstasy and you guys will laugh. Oh, yeah. Let's promote that.

Shrooms and ecstasy. I told you guys about these listeners.

No, shrooms. Sex will never be the same if you do it on ecstasy. Never.

What I'm saying is the first caller was shrooms. Now we got ecstasy. Let's do cocaine next. What's going on here right now?

Don't do ecstasy.

What is happening?

I heard Molly used to be the one.

High sex or drunk sex? We're going with legal narcotics. What's going on? How are you doing, patients?

Hi, I'm good. How are you guys?

Hi, what's your favorite?

Definitely high. I was agreeing with Megan and Mojo, but I have to disagree about the long because I feel like when you're high, I'm okay with it lasting longer.

Yes, but that's not with me.

Actually, it's not as long as you think when you're high.

Yeah, that is true.

For some reason, it just slows it down so much, you know? Initial S wants to be voices, guys. Why do you want to be voices, guys? We're doing a survey here.

I know. Well, this is, wait till you hear what I have to say, and then you'll know why.

Okay.

High sex by far is the best. I take edibles, and my husband doesn't know it. And I take them whenever I want to get in the mood, and it's the best sex ever.

Why does your husband not know it? Why are you keeping that from him?

Because that's what it takes for you.

to be in the mood no he no he's just against edibles okay oh okay i thought maybe yeah that

was her way of uh trying to get in a mood because she didn't want to be in the mood with him when

she's completely sober he just is um totally against it and he has sure he has no clue that everybody around him is doing is pretty much taking edibles but yeah that's okay well thank

you for the call uh i feel like i'm high right now listening to your voice on voice disguise what's

up joe hey what's going on uh wrong time listening first talk nice talking to you man which one is your favorite so i'm i'm a little bit older now so i don't i don't smoke anymore i do drink but back in the day um when i indulged the boat you have to be both if some people are just built different they can handle both and i used to have time in my life it's you got to be both

so you do both so both of them doesn't make your heart want to explode not if you do it right no

so so some people are just built different i'm i'm i'm you know i'm from a i'm from syria i come from the hood i'm just i'm built like that where it's like you can do it you ready to pitch that pin it's like you do it if you got to do because obviously the meat not getting done at night on my end, but, you know, when you wake up in the morning, we'll finish this and we'll get this taken care of.

Wow. So wait, there's a to-be-continued until the next day, it sounds like. That's how good it is. Bosco, what's up? Oh, boy, hold on. Am I stoned off that one? Oh, that was just a weird phone line. What's going on? Not a whole

while. How are you guys doing this morning? Good, buddy.

We're doing a little survey here. I'm like the guy that stands at the mall with the clipboard and asked you questions. What's going on?

Well, I would just say It kind of depends on the mood that you're kind of in, you know, that day or that weekend. Because it just depends. Do you want to get sloppy with it or do you want to get slow and dirty? But I also do have to add, personally, on acid was mine. Oh, my God. No. I'm sorry. No, no, no. I'm sorry. What is it like on acid? No. Hey, it was honestly the most craziest experience ever. Obviously, we're both on it, so, like, we were both experiencing it. at the same time. Not together.

Wait, who brought it? Did you bring it or she surprised you with it?

Well, it was kind of like a mutual thing. We both kind of wanted to try it and we just, you know, attempted it. But honestly, like I said, it was like the most mind-blowing thing that you could ever imagine. And it took a little bit longer, obviously, but it was, like I said, just absolutely crazy.

What in the world? I told you guys, these Mojo in the Morning listeners,

Give them tickets to the rooftop.

Yeah, I don't know. No.

Let's go.

Yeah, let's go. Hold on. You got to talk to Lydia. Lydia.

We're going to be hanging from the balcony.

I'm afraid. Have you ever had a listener that scares you? Bosco. Bosco scares me there.

Merry Christmas from Mojo in the Morning. Mojo in the Morning.

Mojo in the Morning show. I know that this has happened to Megan before, But I want to make Bianca go on the air with us and tell this story. So, did you guys see the picture that was posted from this weekend, the Lions game, where Bianca was in a picture? No. Well, it was pretty fire.

Go look at it.

It's on our page? Yes. Okay. So, Bianca went to the Lions game, and she was with another guy. I see him with the nice shades on. Did you see that?

We look good. We look good. Who is this? okay do you want me to tell you yes spill the tea here so i went to the lions game thank you

mojo for hooking me up with that thank you by the way to uh alan and heather oblock who gave

you those pictures thank you thank you guys so i posted up with this picture and i went back to school yesterday and all my friends at school were like oh my gosh bianca you and your boyfriend look so cute together i can't believe you got a boyfriend you guys look so good and i was like what are you talking about they're like you just hard launched your boyfriend and i was like i don't have a boyfriend guys and they're like who's that guy on your instagram i'm like guys that was my brother this guy y'all do not look alike guys i don't see you don't look alike i'm sorry but you don't second of all i get that all the time i kill you okay well i'm also taller than him and i would never date a guy shorter than me oh my god you don't even look taller than him in this photo because i'm bending down but that's like but it was it was really bad because i went with my brother and his four friends and like i was the only girl there so it looked like i was on like a bachelorette group date or something like like people were staring at me and i saw like i saw people looking at me so i turned around while we were all taking pictures i'm like guys don't worry i don't have four boyfriends this is my brother and his friends like i don't actually have four boyfriends they're like holy cow these guys i was getting stared at like a lot like walking around with four little boys next to me four

little boys okay hold on and by the way first off your brother is a very good looking uh he i know

my best friends are like in love with him are they how old your brother 19 okay so you went

with your brother and it's now being with your brother has ruined your game yeah because no guys

would talk to me or look at me and i even went to tin roof after brought my brother and his friends there and i was like guys i'm gonna have to walk around for a little bit take a lap and try to go

look at the cute boys at tin roof so so megan can you uh give her a little advice on this one because i remember you telling me one time that you know your brother's your best friend but hanging out with your brother sometimes has definitely thrown the scent off the dogs for people when they're out

usually when we're out we try to make it very clear we talk about our dad a lot like have you talked to dad today has dad reached out to you i'm wondering how we're going to divide up the will when dad dies because we both have an equal share because we're siblings yeah yeah a lot of those kinds of hints get dropped but honestly like it is the biggest c-block in the entire world really the way that men won't even look you in the eyes because they feel like you're claimed by another man and you're like i'm allowed to be friends with an adult man that's not my my wall

of protection you cannot approach well i think me sitting at a table at tin roof with four dudes did not help either yeah and me and my brother were went on the same bill because i was expecting him to pay for me but he didn't so i told the waitress i'm like yeah we're on the same bill

i give her my card do you guys ever go to sibling and dating or dating on uh on social media and

instagram you guys ever follow that at all um no i really don't like that site really i really don't because you have a brother that people think you're dating or no i just think it allows people to say inappropriate things about siblings when it's not there and it just creeps me out i don't

like it yeah i get them wrong all the time sibling or dating is an instagram that comes up every now and again in my algorithm where you'll see a picture like say for instance okay see this picture right here yeah look at that couple good looking couple they look like they're at a wedding together what do you think sibling or dating dating her she's hot isn't she she's gorgeous

you say dating yeah i think they're siblings kevin what do you say i feel like for the vibes i'm

gonna say sibling sibling what megan you say siblings and they are ready hold on geez hold

moment of truth hold on there we go they're dating oh no but that's why i thought they were

both in the wedding party see here's the thing go back to the picture real quick anytime see now because now i'm trying to put this picture with is his hand on her arm her top left well there's

no his arm his arm is her hand is right around her waist see there you go i've never held my

sister around the way really because in that picture my brother did not the one mojo posted but the one on my instagram my brother like had my hand and it was like kind of lower and i was

like i don't know if it looks bad we need to do sibling we need to actually can we send that picture to sibling or dating okay we'll do it and let's ask yeah no no look at no the picture that is posted up on mojo on the morning.com it looks like he's got his arm around you yeah because you

can't see yeah me and my brother are close though we're like no it's not weird oh no no here's one Look at, he's got his hand on your ass.

Hold on, bro. Where is that at? Look at that.

Where's that one? That's what he's doing. Oh, hell no. Oh, no.

What are y'all up to? Hold on.

Chaldean, though. It's okay. Hell no. Y'all grab ass? No, no, no, no. All right. It's Chaldean to touch your sister's butt. Look at this. That's butt, dude. No, it's upper waist.

That ain't bro. That's bae. I want sibling or dating on this one.

I want to know

844-MOJO-LIVE 844-665-6548 Is there anybody listening who's ever touched their sister's ass? I want to know who has the thing that happens with Megan and her brother and Bianca and her brother Who has the fact that when they go out with their sibling, they always have to, like, verbalize it and say, no, we're not dating. This is not, you know, this is like my brother of all people.

Megan, did he get this wild at German Fest?

Sometimes my brother might do it, though, so guys don't hit on me. Because sometimes I'll go to the bar, and so my brother will be like, who's that guy that's trying to talk to you? Hey, what's he trying to do? Listen, you have to repost this picture to the story.

Do like a pole or something, a slider or something. This is going to be so humbling. You have to see this. Send that, though, to sibling or dating and ask them if they'll post that. Because I bet you that they would. What? They totally would. Send them their good picture. This is your lead picture.

Like, you didn't even bury this in a carousel. Yes. Yeah, dude. It's because I look the best in that one. I don't care about what he's doing. I look good in it. It's going front.

I got to be honest with you, though. I'm not going to lie. One of my buddies said this one time. His sister was a smoke show. he said to me if i wasn't uh sisters she wasn't my sister i would do my sister oh he made that

comment no he doesn't he doesn't say that about me no i know your brother doesn't my one of my

buddies i know one of my friend one of my friends had a sister that was an absolute like model model model and he said listen if we weren't sis if we weren't brother and sister i'd do her and i was like no it's not like that that's crazy what's up casey how you doing good morning mojo

So I was, like, five months pregnant with my son at the time. He actually turned 10 today. Well, anyway, I went to AutoZone with my brother at the time. And all the workers there were like, congratulations, happy Father's Day. Me and my brother were like, this ain't my baby. He's like, this is my twin sister, actually.

Say my baby. The twin sister.

Happy Father's Day. Right?

I was like, um, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

That definitely hurt your tip.

When I met Shannon's or Wes's dad, I thought they were brothers. I met him at the podcast. And I was like, oh, my God, you and your brother look so alike. And Wes was like, that's my dad.

What's up? Zuri, hi. How you doing?

Hi. So people actually get me. It's not me and my siblings. It's me and my dad. I'm from a biracial family. I'm a lot darker than my father. And any time we go out, people stare at us and they think that I am his sugar baby. I mean, any time.

Does your dad have to call it out so that it doesn't look weird?

A lot of times, people are like, hey, we'll go to concerts. And they're like, hey, is that your girlfriend? And he's like, this is my daughter, guys. My daughter. And they're like, what?

I'm telling you, I was at Carl's Golf Land. I told this story on the air, which is the mecca of golf stuff. And there was a situation where there was what I thought was a father and a daughter. and he was buying and it was right around father's day and she was buying him stuff it was his girlfriend young much younger girlfriend and i was like oh my god that would be like so embarrassing but the guy was like so proud over it but zuri b oh

we're gonna ask her doesn't it feel nice like somebody thought you're worth paying for

ask bianca that or did your brother buy you a drink at all no he didn't he actually made

me pay for everything are you kidding me you're not a gentleman whatsoever no wonder why you don't

have a girlfriend your little brother oh my god maybe you're maybe you're ruining his game too

maybe you know trust me all my friends like they're low-key dating i know they are

sam what's up so my i um am a first time caller long time yeah sam on the phone yes so my um we just had our first baby just over a year ago and my husband is nine years older than me and so he went through the burger king drive-thru for me um and the gentleman behind the window said oh your your grandson is so cute they were on my husband's phone and my husband came home was like we're never going to that

by the way the entire time that you just told us that all i kept thinking of was isn't it humpty dance where it goes the Burger King drive-thru or whatever it is in the Humpty Dance. I was getting busy with it. Burger King bathroom. Not drive-thru, yeah. I know the Hulk. It's for Bianca and her brother.

That's too far now. He was already at first base. Hey, chill.

My dad listened to this. No.

And my sound's laid down by the underground I'll drink up all the hands that you got on your shelf So just let me introduce myself My name is Bianca And this is my brother Yo, bro I like it

Rappers in the top ten Please align me to pump it

I'm stepping tall, y'all, and just like Humpty Dumpty, you're gonna fall when the stereos punk me. I like the rhyme, I like my beats funky, I'm spunky, I like my oatmeal, limey, I'm sick with this. Straight gangster Mac, but sometimes I get ridiculous. I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice, or yo, fat girl. Come here, are you ticklish? Yeah, I told you fat, look at me, I'm skinny. It never stopped me from getting busy, I'm a freak.

I like a girl for all those lyrics. Oh, I've got busy in a Burger King bathroom, I'm a little messy.

By the way, to all of the attractive, good-looking guys in East Lansing, Michigan.

Oh, God. No, I don't want any guys from East Lansing. They all suck. I don't want any guys from East Lansing. They all suck everywhere.

You're going into your senior year? You've got to have. Give me a Chaldean boy from Sterling Heights, and then we'll talk. There you go. Chaldean guys from Sterling Heights. You want to know what I'm getting for Christmas? Fat. I'm getting fat. Merry Christmas from Mojo in the Morning. Megan got drunk this weekend. For those that are saying to yourself, oh, well, you know, I got drunk too this weekend. Megan doesn't really drink. No. And you say you got drunk on accident?

Absolutely on accident. And it all happened when I was having a sleepover at my dad's place, which is extra embarrassing about all this. But I needed a place to stay this weekend. and my dad lives downtown so i asked him hey can i stay the night at your place so i get over there pretty early and as soon as i get there i cracked one open i don't know what was going on with me but i just i needed one and then my dad knows that when i do drink there's really only one thing i like drinking and it's gin and he bought some interesting gins and he wanted to make me some martinis so scottie started playing bartender at his house and started making me drinks i'm like all right, then this is kind of nice, right? My dad and I go out for dinner, meet up with my brother, get the best margarita I've ever had, a little bit strong. And then we had one of the nicest listeners in the entire world come up to me and ask to do a shot with me. And because I was already quite a few drinks in, I'm like, yeah. Usually I turn those down, but I was like, let's do it. It's Friday, baby. I take the shot, our food arrives, and I'm like, oh, my God, I'm wasted. I stumbled my way to the bathroom, and you ever look at yourself in the mirror in the bathroom, and you're like, pull it together.

Oh, I actually, I out loud give myself a pep talk. Don't die. That's why I'm looking at myself in the mirror.

I was at one of those places, too, that has two bathrooms, but they're both unisex, and I followed a guy in, and a guy came in after me, and I had to check the wall to make sure that it was unisex and that I didn't go into the men's restroom. and I stumbled my way back to the table where my dad and my brother are both sober and I'm hammer drunk and they're both annoyed with me. We're getting hammered. But you're doing that thing where you're like, don't talk too loud. Don't shout in everybody's face. Make sure other people talk during this conversation. Like the whole time I'm just sitting there focusing so hard on being a normal human being. And when we finally get back to my dad's place, I fell in his hallway into the wall and my dad had to physically hold on to me to walk me into his apartment because i'm stumbling around and i realized wow i got drunk with my dad for the first time on accident and everybody else was over were you so drunk that you couldn't feel

your mouth it's like when it's like you had novocaine or something yes yes wait so you were drinking gin with dad at home and then you went and did margarita so you were mixing alcohol

too it went beer to gin oh geez tequila how was your dad okay because he wasn't drinking with me nobody was drinking you're the only one oh i thought he was partaking at his apartment at least oh jeez dinner but like audrey yeah yeah and i don't know if you're feeling this but

since you've lost weight do you feel like your tolerance level is Oh, my God. Like, you have no tolerance?

Bro, I didn't have tolerance before, and I think after the first drink, I was like, all right, hold off till dinner.

Yeah.

And then he was like, I need to make you something. I got this just for you. You can't say no to that. Oh, that's crazy. So then I had another one.

You are a cheap drunk right now, aren't you?

Oh, my God, yeah. And then you get to dinner, and you're like, well, we're walking home, and it's Friday. It's fine. I'll have one more. And then the shot rolled in, and I was like, ah, wheels are off. Let's go, baby.

Oh, my God. Who got so drunk this weekend they don't remember? Can we call us up and share in Megan's, you know, fun that she had? 844-MOJO-LIVE, 844-665-6548. Is there anybody that got so drunk they don't even, like, recall what they did and how they got to bed?

You are drunk at a tissue level.

I always love those days.

You and I are so different when it comes to shots because when a shot comes my way, I figure out what the heck to do with it because I'm not taking it. When a shot comes Megan's way, no matter how buzzed she already is, she's taking it.

I'm taking that shot, baby. Depending on what it is. You hand me an ear. You are such a shot, girl. I know. If it's tequila. Let's go. I will rip any shot of tequila.

I hate when you'll go somewhere and people are just like, let me buy you a shot. I'm like, oh, I'm not a shot person.

Shots get the party started, though.

Oh, no.

Drinks you kind of like. It's like those cars where you hit the gas and you see how fast you can get zero to 60. That's what a shot is.

I was going to say, a shot to me is, good night, I'll see you tomorrow. I'm done.

A shot gets you pregnant. That doesn't get you anything other than in trouble. So you got to be careful of that. Hold on, Mojo in the morning. Mike, are you there, Mike?

Yes, sir.

Yeah, sir. Wow, you must have really done some bad stuff this weekend. Did you get drunk this weekend?

No, no, I was with family.

Oh, okay. All right. Well, I was putting out the call for people. I still want to hear. Who got drunk this weekend? Call us up. When's the last time that everybody was drunk, too? Because I got to tell you that there's nothing worse than the feeling that you were drunk and you were the only one drinking, like Megan's case. Because that happened to me on my last time that I was drunk.

See, when you have my friends, you're never the only one drunk.

Yeah. Maybe you have my friend.

You're never drunk alone when you're walking with Christy. This is, this is, uh, Megan, this is for you.

This is, uh, 419 says, Megan, don't worry. I was there. I witnessed you Saturday looking fine.

Good.

Um, then a, another texter here, uh, Texan texter, Matt says, uh, Megan, I feel you. I drank so much this weekend that I have no idea what happened to me for two days. Two days, John.

What's up, Shane? How you doing? Let's call it Rufy. What's up, Mojo? How y'all doing today? We're good.

Do I need to talk quiet because you had a party weekend?

No, it wasn't even last week. It was probably like two months ago that went out with some friends. All I remember, we was drinking Julio. We went to the casino, and I woke up at my mom's crib, and I did not know where my car was at.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Wait, so somebody must have brought you to your mom's. Do you normally go to your mom's, or they just dropped you off at your mom's?

No, I was just on the west side of Detroit. My mom stayed over there. You know how I went out with friends? Yeah, okay. And I wasn't panicking when I woke up. I'm just like, damn, where the hell is my car? Dude, where's my car? I just sat on a Porsche car with my friend. He was like, man, I got the car. I dropped you off.

You were drinking Julio. A texture here was drinking twisted tea. Had so many of those that their week was twisted. And then one of my favorites, and this is true, too. This one is from 313. The best hangover cure is a McDonald's Coke.

Ooh, full fat.

There's nothing better than you got in full fat, meaning regular. Is that what it is? Yeah. So you got to get those. And for some reason, McDonald's hash browns, too. You got to have, like, the grease of the McDonald's hash brown soaking up all the alcohol. Hey, Shane, have a great day, buddy. Be safe. Thanks, y'all, too. Back to Mojo in the Morning. All right, it is Mojo in the Morning. Shannon has a little Christmas hoarding obsession. And what is that, Shannon?

I just want to feel normal. So if you are the same way, please call and let me know. um i i think i have a little bit of my dad tim murphy in me because he's this way and i i blame him for this because he was the one that got me started and taught me this where every year on christmas morning we my sisters and i would open our gifts and he would have a separate pile for just the bows because you had to save the bows so that you could reuse them a pile next

year meaning after you open up you have to put your no so as you're opening the gifts you hand over the boat and you would hand over the boat to my dad you can't just like throw it in the pile

with all the wrapping no because then it could accidentally get thrown away in one of those big black trash bags right you like you had to hand it to dad or my stepmom chris and she and they would you know put it in a bin or whatever for next year you i am the same way i reuse bows all the time ribbon if the gift comes beautifully wrapped with ribbon no gift bags tissue paper if the gift wrap is good and I open it like a certain way I will fold it and use it again but I think I realized I have hit a new low when I was unpacking I'm just finishing one of the trees in my house because I have 10,000 trees that we bought this year and I bought these ornaments from Target and they're these beautiful big velvet ornaments and they come in a container where they're like Thank you.

It's one big box, but they're all individually in their own little slot. And each slot has this crinkle paper that they're nestled in. So I'm unpacking them. I'm putting them on the tree. And I was filling Ziploc bags with this crinkle paper because I know that I will use it at the bottom of a gift basket or something this year to give as a gift. And Wes was like, what in the actual F are you doing? Like, we could go to Michael's and get this for 99 cents, but you're sitting here re-bagging it into Ziploc bags to put away so that we can use it for something else. It's so cheap. But I'm like, but then I'm just going to throw this away, and I could use it. New low with that one.

I will reuse, like, gift bags, and I've made the mistake of not realizing that the person who gave us the gift bag with the gift still had their card attached to it. Like the little swing tag? Yeah, like wine bags. Do you guys ever get wine in a bag? All the time I reuse those.

I was just about to say, the only gift bag you're allowed to reuse is a wine bag. Because how often are you actually going out to buy one of those? But when you need a last-minute gift, you know that you could just grab something out of the cabinet. You throw away good gift bags? All the time. Because I don't collect trash.

It's not trash, though. It is trash.

It's perfectly reusable. Seriously, this is going to make me hot.

Bring them here. Nice. I have tissue paper. in my car you can have. I was going to throw it away today, but I will give it to you. Isn't it that?

I swear my dad, I get gift bags from him that are from like 1989. Really? Yeah, I mean, they have made the rounds.

Don't you think, though, that when you were a little kid, you looked at your dad and you're like, man, my dad must not make any money or something like that. He's doing all this stuff.

He's just super frugal. My machine's granny was the

same way. But did you not look at that, though, and say, I'll never be like that, and now you're like that?

No, I see it as being so wasteful to have bows and bags and stuff and to open it, use it one time and throw it away.

So when your kids open up their Christmas wrapping.