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I'm going to do the morning show. So, one of my really, really good friends is a stay-at-home dad, and he runs a very good business, a big business, but does it out of his house. But he's with the kids all day, and he actually homeschools the kids, too.

Wow.

So, it's unbelievable what he does. And here's the wildest part of this whole thing. He's got all of his hair. He's not gray. And he hasn't lost his mind yet I can't understand it Mike What is his secret? I don't know what his secret is But he did have something happen to him the other day Hold on I want to call him up because I want to ask him about this And I have him tell you guys this story The question I'm going to ask the listeners is What did you do when you went to a public restroom And they did not have toilet paper And you didn't realize it until it was too late Will?

Hi, Mojo.

How you doing, buddy?

Good, how are you?

Good. So, Will, I was just describing you and the fact that you have complete sanity, yet you are home with the kids, homeschooling them, and also dealing with trying to keep the house together, and then also it was your wife Jessica's birthday the other day, right?

The 40th birthday is today.

Today! Happy birthday, Jessica! Happy birthday, Josh! Celebrating her 40th birthday today. Is it okay for us to say what you ended up going and getting at the store? Because will she know to the surprise?

Already, I'm bad at keeping surprises. So I gave that surprise out yesterday on the way to her birthday dinner with our office. Okay. All right.

So here's the interesting thing. He went to Party City. Okay. Anybody that's ever been to a Party City, do they have Party City? cities in West Michigan and in Toledo? Yeah, of course. All right. Anybody who's ever been there post-COVID knows this. Simply just to go get some balloons is a task these days, unless you pre-order them like months ahead of time or something, right? It's always like craziness trying to get those things. But it happened to you, Will, that you went in there to go get your balloons for Jessica, and then you started getting the bubble gut.

so anybody knows if you've been into party city and you walk in the door they always say welcome to the party well there's never anybody there and it's never a party but i'm pretty sure made

it a party you you had to go use the bathroom at a party city where is the bathrooms at party city is it like the back corner or something actually that's exactly where it's at in the back corner

of the building on the one on orchard lake road and you have to try to find it so we're there pick up a couple of the two big gold 40 balloons and it hit me and i'm like all right kids i'm like we got to go to the bathroom real quick so we're walking walking all the way to the back we were on the way to take danny to his jiu-jitsu class This was on Monday. Big shout out to Roots Combat Club. There you go. Get it. World-class facility. World-class facility. All right.

Okay.

Who plays into this? So Danny's wearing Crocs and socks. We walk all the way back there. I reach for the toilet paper. There is none. Oh, no.

Oh, no. My worst fear.

I wrecked their toilet. kids are outside the bathroom because they're old enough danny just turned seven he can watch his sister they're right outside the door i can hear him and i'm thinking like what am i going to do i'm like oh it's jiu-jitsu class with coach alex today i go danny i go take off your take off your crocs and take off your socks i go just put your crocs on he's like why i go because you don't wear socks at jiu-jitsu it'll be easier it's faster when we get there in a few minutes She's like, okay, takes them off. I open the door real quick, hands me the socks. It's toilet paper piece number one, toilet paper.

Here's my question. Here's my question. Go ahead. What's your question? How'd you get from the toilet to the door? What was the stance?

You know what? It's kind of like that squatty potty product. I just squatted right over, didn't open the door, but like one creak, Danny already had his socks off, boom, grabbed him, shut the door with less than 10 seconds. I threw the socks away, I didn't flush them Threw them away And we kept going

Wow, that's amazing You know what, that's a dad right there No way Wait, so wait Why could you not do this? You're in Party City Maybe your kids aren't old enough to do this Definitely not old enough to do it But my thought would have been We're in Party City, there's gotta be Like Spider-Man napkins or something On one of the counters You know?

That's a long jiu-jitsu Roots Combat Club bear crawl all the way to the place. How do you wipe with socks? Do you put your hand, like, up the sock like a puppet? Great question. I mean, Danny's seven, so his feet are kind of small. I just did the one finger.

All right, we don't need to get into that whole thing. Wait, when you left, Will, when you got done with this after using, you know, your son's socks, did you tell the people that say, hey, welcome to the party behind the counter? Hey, we need to get some toilet paper in that place?

No, actually, I walked out and they said, have a good day. And I walked out and said, have a great day with a crap eating grin on my face. I walked out. I mean, that was it. I felt bad. I felt embarrassed, but not too bad. So I just kind of walked out.

Wait, what if they were Danny's favorite socks? Would you have done that if they were Danny's favorite socks?

Yeah, 100%. I absolutely would have. I probably went on Amazon right there and ordered another pair for him. If they were Hulk socks, I would not have done that. But I think they were like Thor or another superhero. But they weren't the Hulk socks, 100%.

By the way, that's not a bad place to actually not have toilet paper because there's obviously access to go get it.

There's a ton of other things, yeah.

What would you have done? Would you ever consider this? Would you ever consider pulling your pants up to a point where they weren't touching your Botox?

No. You know, honestly, what I probably would have done, especially if I didn't have anybody with me and I was by myself, right? Like, you, Will, were very resourceful and lucky to have your kids. I would have probably taken off my underwear and used my underwear to wipe and then thrown away my underwear. Yeah, but what happens when you're wearing, like, the... The thongy thong. Like the thin, second-skin thong or whatever. I mean, at least it's something. I don't know.

Will, did you think about that? What if your son didn't have socks on?

I would have found some sort of paper product without having to go too far. I don't know what it would have been. Money. Yes, I would have, yes. Just walk down, ask somebody for a dollar. I'll be right back.

the worst is i had that same thing happen to me and i was getting ready to start a remote for the station years back and i remember we were doing we were doing a remote at a cell phone store and they let me use their bathroom that they have at a cell phone store which is in the back area there you pooped in that and all i remember was there was no toilet paper so i picked up my phone called the cell phone store and i had to go through the national hotline of thank you for calling verizon wireless blah blah blah blah blah and i'm like hit for the store locator hi um i'm in the toilet the funny thing was when they finally brought me toilet paper and told me that there's you know here you go you do the whole thing they said we were wondering how long you were going to be they thought i was in there you know having a really really bad time like gosh if this doesn't

say happy birthday.

to my beautiful wife, Jessica, on her 40th birthday. Oh, there you go. That's right.

Your husband's a dirt bag. I don't know what else.

No, no, that's sweet. That is so sweet that you did that. All right, Will. We'll talk to you later, buddy. Have a great day and happy birthday to Jessica. Bye, guys. Take care of yourself.

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