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It's Mojo in the Morning Show. How was your Easter, Kevin? It was a vibe. What did you do? It looked like I saw you went to church. I saw the picture.

Who was that with you?

I saw Joe Sian. Grandma Ma was in there. Uncle Paul was in there. Great to see Uncle Paul battling cancer. This is the first time I've seen him in a very long time. Paul. I love it. Yeah, facts. Cousin Brandy, Laina, Laino, Breer. I mean, Bre, Mir. They're brother and sister. I kind of merged their names together. Yeah, so the whole family's out there. And then my cousin, shout out to Gerard. Y'all know Gerard. He pulled up to my birthday, him and Chrissy. So Gerard texted me. Church started at 11. Gerard ain't pulled up to church. So Gerard texted me. He was like, yo.

Wait, is that your way of selling him out that he didn't go to church?

No, I mean, he didn't go to church. Like you didn't need to bring that up.

I think you did.

I just like to give full context. So Gerard didn't come to church. So he had to text me and say, hey, slide by. We have a family dinner at 5. So in my mind, I'm like, okay, you didn't have breakfast this morning. You got up and went straight to church. We're not going to eat anything. And we're going to pig out at 5 p.m. once we get to family dinner. That was my plan. Plan executed to perfection. I show up to a family dinner, maybe 5, 5, 10, walk in through the garage because it was up. Through the garage, there's the kitchen. All the food is laid out. What kind of food are we talking about? I'm talking, we got chicken wings that are to die for. Hot, spicy, just like I like them. Okay. Rice, greens with the bacon in there, turkey meat in them joints. Okay. They got turkey legs on there. He got some type of beef situation, macaroni and cheese, greens. The spread is spreading. So I walk in. I say, hi. I'm in the kitchen. I grab a plate. Bang. Plate filled to the nines. Go in the room. It's playoffs on. So I'm watching the game. Smash my first plate. Bang. Go back into the kitchen. Get my second plate ready to go. How full is the second one? Second one. Look like the first one. Wow. We just got a little bit more chicken wings on this one. Okay. All right. The first time you eat, you kind of get a little of everything. Did I say that we had yams? Then you get a lot of what you liked on the first one. You said the plate was full.

It was.

Okay.

Like built like a pyramid. It's like rising. First off, you guys keep throwing them off. Where are we going with this? Where are we going? What did you do?

I had a plate of full. Okay. Bang. Bang the second plate out. Bang. Did I rest a little bit? Yeah. Going to the kitchen to reload for a third. Yeah. And then my auntie in there, she's like, oh, going back again for another plate. I'm like, yeah, I'm hungry. She's like, hmm, you're really hungry, aren't you? Yeah. And then it starts the conversation. They're like, how many plates can I have at the function? and I'm like as many as I have the food is here for us to eat right that's what I'm saying so is there a limit on how many plates I'm supposed to have

your auntie was shaming you because you had three

plates a little bit see i hosted yesterday and we have so much leftover food i should have called you because i i think that you eat until the food is gone you are entitled to as many plates as you

want until the food is gone but maybe auntie wanted to have some leftovers for the week

well then she should have put some aside after everybody had maybe more people but maybe more

people were coming we don't know it could have been more people showing up it wasn't a big

function like that or it's not auntie house it's not your house you just because you an elder don't mean you can control how many plates i get you're gonna tell her that no i know you're not gonna

tell her that how many people were there it was like maybe eight and they had all already had

their first place and maybe second the last one's there maybe maybe she's worried about your health i mean you know look at how fat you are maybe there's a little bit of auntie working it's none I saw your mom in the picture. I saw grandma. They didn't come. They didn't come. So you were eating for them too?

No, I was eating for myself. Told you. We wait the whole time. You getting a little happy with these fat girls. I'm telling you. You stop those zipping. We're going to see what happens. Give me back up.

It's Manjuro. Tell me. Pro Francis can't heal you. No, he gone. Wait, wait. Where is auntie's number? I want to call auntie. Auntie's asleep. She's old. What's up, JJ? No old people sleep past that.

Or Gerard, sorry, Gerard. Gerard, so Gerard. Are Gerard Gigi the same person? No, no, no. No separate people.

So Gerard, Gerard.

Sorry, I had to think about that for a second.

No, no, not all black people look the same.

Wow, Shannon.

Wow.

I couldn't remember. Michael Jordan and Michael B. Jordan are different people. Wow. So look, so Gerard said that you can have a max of two plates. Yes, agreed. And this included if you have a to-go plate. Disagree.

Agreed. Disagree.

I thought I had Gerard's number in my phone.

If there is still food, and they're not putting the food away, you are welcome to that food.

And your first plate should be small. What? Oh, absolutely. Why? I disagree with that. Because if you scoop up like a ton, you said mac and cheese, right? Mac and cheese can be very hit or miss in my culture. All right? You know what I mean?

It's hitting every time at Creasy Hall.

But at my house, hit or miss, baby. That's a real big hit or miss. So if you pile up your plate, and then you throw away that giant pile of macaroni, you're the bad guy. You got to do a small plate first. You got to taste test everything. That's smart. You got to see what's good. You got to see what's bad. And then your second plate, which is your only allowable extra plate, is just the good stuff piled up to where you're going to be full. You eat until it's done.

You are eating way too much, Governor, and I'm worried about you. Bro, listen. You got diabetes in your family? I do not want.

Do I have diabetes? Do I have diabetes in my family? What's happening on this show? What do you have in your family? Do they all look alike?

I don't want.

Do we all have the same diseases? No.

I know you have diabetes. Come on. Come on. We all do.

Let me slow it down. Where are you calling it?

I'm calling Gerard.

I'm about to let it fly. You got Gerard's number?

Yeah, I got Gerard's number. We went golfing, so I got Gerard's number.

Gerard's not JG. I told you he's asleep, bro. Y'all don't listen. No, no, no. Gerard.

All right, hold on, Gerard. By the way, why do we go? I remember that. He goes by a different name. Hold on. His real name is William. Hold on. At the tone, please record your message. I think this is better, man. When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press one for more options. Gerard, it's Mojo. I need you to call us STAT. We need to find out what we can do for our friend Kevin. He's eating way too much at the family functions, and I know that Auntie is not going to be happy about that. So can you call us back, please? Thank you. Donnie wants to make a comment. What's going on, Donnie?

Hey, good morning.

Good morning, Donnie. What's up?

Kevin is the reason why his family has a limit for Thanksgiving.

Kevin, how many plates did you have at Thanksgiving? I don't remember, bro. That was a while ago. I eat until I stop. That's the rule. Well, but you can't just keep going up to the buffet. Why?

The food is there. Like, we can just throw it away? Or are they going to put it in their refrigerator leftover for a few days and then throw it away after nobody wants it? Yep, that's exactly what happens.

Do you guys, I don't know if you remember this. This radio show got kicked out one time, Donnie, at the Chinese buffet in Novi. We went up to so many times that they literally put a ban on Mojo in the Morning Show meetings at the Chinese buffet. Those were the greatest buffets ever, too.

But that's the place where you can get eight plates, eight small plates.

Well, that's the problem. Their plates were not big enough.

Right.

So that was a little bit of a problem.

That's fair. Now, again, this is my family. If I come to one of y'all's house, there are different rules. You don't eat the same outside the house that you do inside the house.

Wade, you're saying that you're only allowed to if they know you are an eater.

Well, I mean, I just have, I think there's a part where decorum comes in. And I think if you're going to somebody else's home, you know, you act a little better. Allie.

what's up it's mojo in the morning hi ali hi good morning how is everybody fantastic what's going on so again those are for real white people problems for sure um yep i'm from the south side chicago like mojo and uh you can pick different cultures and you definitely know what to eat where you walk

into absolutely it is hard to be white on the holidays all right i i recognize there is a privilege associated with my color, but it does not present itself in the kitchen. You sound like you ball. We didn't take any seasonings with us. We saw salt and we were like, that's it. And the tiniest. That's all we get out of it. A whisper of salt. Somebody sneezed one time over a jar of salt. That's what we get. I haven't been to

white people's house on the holidays.

It's disappointing. Don't go. I know you were saying all these foods that were out on the counter and we had like four options yesterday i'm starting to think that i was like

not a great hostess we we have lots of options we and we have a lot of food but the problem is sometimes when you have a lot of boys the boys eat we have to tell the boys ahead of time before you guys go that you're only allowed like if it were up to my kids they would choose like 28 000 rolls and they would eat they would eat a pile of as long as they hawaiian rolls yeah they love

the problem with us is everybody we host easter dinner and the problem is everybody goes elsewhere for easter brunch or lunch so by the time they come to us they're not even hungry yeah i've learned my lesson of not making a bajillion things do a dessert spread my favorite brunches are not

the brunches that the uh you know that the kids like these days my favorite brunches are the buffets brunches they used to call brunches where there's like sections there's like breakfast in one area dinner in the other salad in the other you know what i mean my favorite brunch is mimosas

that's it that's that's what makes a bread what's going on whitney it's just breakfast

uh one plate ten plate we all want to know about mojo's ass you want to know how many i had i actually know what's that know about your ass oh you want to know about my ass

my my my ass is getting better thank god thank you for asking about it yes but my but but i but I will tell you this one or 10 plates the I'm on a weight loss shot I cannot do that many and uh honestly if I tried a second plate I would throw up on myself it's it's that bad

so which is good what's up uh Amanda hi hey I just need to say y'all need to leave Kevin alone it was a holiday you're allowed to pig out on a holiday it's the American way but the but his

His auntie wants to make sure that there's enough food for everyone, not just for Kevin.

Well, his auntie probably go around telling everybody bad things about themselves. Who knows?

Do you know at the Last Supper, if one of the disciples ate all the food, there wouldn't be enough for everybody. He's a Judas.

Yes.

So what's going on, Emily? How you doing?

Good morning. I'm great. How are you?

Fantastic. What's up?

So I feel like you have to follow the lead of the person who cooked the food or whose home you're in. Like, if I cook a whole lot of food and I need it going, I'm going to tell you, fix plates, take plates. Come get more, get seconds, right? But obviously, if I'm, like, hawking over the food, stash of stuff here and there, and you see it's almost gone, don't come back for another plate.

Yeah. So you would have done the same thing that Kev's aunt did to him. You would have said, Kevin, we need to know there are starving kids that are potentially coming over here.

If I had to tap somebody on their shoulder because they are just outrageous, like this is their foreplay, yeah. If you're not putting that in the bag to go, I'm going to need you to go sit down.

And if family can't tell family that they need to back away, then who can tell you? You know what I mean? I think it's the same thing with alcohol. I think if people are over drinking, I think you've got to be able to say something. Just like if you're eating too much.

kevin yeah she didn't it's not her house though and she didn't cook the food so like like were

there left was there still food on the counter when you left yeah and we was the last people

to leave but like a lot of food or like a little bit uh i mean enough for a few plates

you should have taken one more on the way out and she gave me one like you did you get a turkey leg i was like no she's like take a turkey leg well at that point she's making fun of you No, she's not.

By the way, you're never invited over to her house.

Mojo throwing darts, and I'm about to throw them back.

You're never invited over to her house.

I thought you were about to say your house.

Of course I am.

Remember the last time Mojo had us over and we were rationed like four grapes and one chicken finger?

Mojo doesn't cook, though. He's going to order in.

No, I order in, and I ordered in, and they literally made it small portions. They made it recession portions.

They've taken over cities before, but this July...

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