Muse

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Yeah, this boss is out of town. So we're going to get him, who's supposed to be kind of looking over the story while the other boss is out of town.

I like how we don't name the actual store. We kind of just insinuate what it is. You'll figure it out. The name that you're going to put on this phone scam on the podcast basically has the name. Yeah.

We're going to call it the Cold Stones phone scam.

You're home with the phone scams. This is Mojo in the Morning.

Hey, this is Sean. Hi, you said this is Sean?

Yeah, this is Sean.

Hi, Sean, this is Spencer over at store number 1233. Brenda told us to call you if we had any major issues. What's up? Well, we have the ultimate ice cream experience over here with Larry. He's killing me. Okay, what did he do? Well, Larry put his long dong silver on the frozen granite and now it's stuck.

He put his what?

His $5 footlong.

This is a f***ing humor, right?

What are you talking about? Yo, no, I know. I'm calling from the other store. This is Spencer. I'm not trying to say the word, but you know what I'm saying. He got the cold stones.

I'm afraid I have no idea what you're saying.

I mean, his cockatoo. Larry put his p*** on the granite, and now his snowballs got instantly stuck to the countertop.

What are you talking about?

Well, so I was just chilling like a villain cleaning up the front area, And I hear this scream and I look over at the dummy with his snossage out and hold on a second. There's a customer. Hang on. OK, thank you, ma'am. Have a nice day. OK, no, I'm sorry. She was just asking for directions to the store around the corner. So here's the thing. He put his private parts on the frozen granite slab. And now he's stuck to the slab like a kid's tongue on a flagpole. Like he was quitting and he thought it'd be funny trying to make a video to go viral. I don't know, on TikTok or something.

Is this a joke or is this for real?

Oh, this is really for real. Now he's standing here like a dummy. His apron's covering his pinkest to dinkest, but it needs defrosting.

This is happening right now?

Yes, sir. And he's sitting here crying that it hurts like an a**hole, but now his anaconda is iced.

I don't know. Why would he ever do something? You guys have to close the store down or something. We can have customers coming in and seeing.

Okay, well, don't be judgy with me when I was just trying to be helpful. Like, tell me how to get his baloney pony unstuck from the countertap.

I don't even know why he put it there. I don't even know what I'm supposed to do in this situation. Me either.

And I did not ask for this. I don't even want to see it. You think maybe if I pour some really hot water on it, it'll release?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, you need to close the store. Maybe call 911.

I don't even want to deal with this. This is no longer a nut-free environment.

Please just close the store.

Don't say you guys. I was just trying to make customers signature frozen creations.

What is happening?

But I was going to leave in five minutes. Can you come over and take care of it?

I mean, I feel like I would have to. Please do not go anywhere.

Okay, but when you come over, I just want to warn you, you're going to see his ding-a-ling right there on the countertop. Put a rag over it. Oh, my God. I don't even want to get near his hairy canary. I'm going to tell him to do it. Oh, my gosh. All right, I'm going to notify all the customers that were closed. I'm going to put a sign on the door. It says, frozen penis, sorry, can't open.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Just no, no, no. Lock the door.

Right. And then, Sean, can you come handle this and take care of it? I'm in the other store. Oh, and also, Sean, he wanted me to tell you that you've just been the victim of a phone scam. This is the Mojo in the Morning Show. Oh, my gosh.

Oh, my goodness. I almost had a heart attack. I really thought somebody was going to jail.

We were told that you had to handle both stores while the other manager was out of town.

Wow.

we will we will scam you you're home with the phone scams the world famous this is mojo in the morning

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