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Role Playing at Kroger
Mojo In The Morning

Role Playing at Kroger

from Mojo In The Morning

January 24, 2023 | 00:10:42 | Leisure

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Mojo the Morning Show. Good to have you guys here with us today. Home of the phone scams. War of the Roses, the Dirty on the 30. So Chelsea and I have a really good friend, Shannon. She actually is somebody that I used to work with in radio. You guys have met Shannon before. She's best. She's cool. Her name is Shannon Black. She's on the radio in Arizona. And she and her husband have the most interesting love life ever. First off, they love on each other like everybody should love on their significant others. I mean, they even get to a point where they wear goofy T-shirts, matching T-shirts to concerts and stuff. I saw him at a Morgan Wallen concert wearing a, you know, I'm with Idiot, and he's like, I'm Idiot, you know, shirt or something like that. I don't know.

00:03:29 - 00:03:32 | Speaker 6:

They're the Hakuna Matata couple at Disney.

00:03:33 - 00:03:33 | Speaker 3:

That's right.

00:03:34 - 00:03:35 | Speaker 6:

One wears Hakuna, one wears Matata.

00:03:35 - 00:05:00 | Speaker 3:

Matata, exactly. Well, one of the things that Shannon has done is they like to play a little role playing game where they'll go to places and they'll pretend like they just met and they don't do it in like just like a bar, you know, like some people will do this like in a bar or some people will go on a vacation. Like I've actually heard of couples that will do this and these guys are like swanky couples where they'll go on a vacation somewhere and they'll check into the hotel, like checking in, like, you know, they're, you know, hi, here's my name and here's my name. And they have the same room, but they pretend like they just met at the hotel bar and then they go up to the room. Well, they do it at like Kroger. So they will go into a Kroger or whatever grocery store they go to. I think they're on West Coast, so it's Safeway, and they go into the grocery store, and they'll be shopping for their groceries, and they each have their own list, and then they meet halfway through somewhere in the grocery store, and then they pick each other up, and then they go home, and they, I don't even know if they put their groceries away. I don't think they might even leave them, who knows, with these guys. So yesterday, Chelsea and I had to go get stuff for dinner, and I said to her, I go, hey, let's do the Shannon game. And Chelsea's like, we're not doing the Shannon game. I go, come on, just at least entertain me for a moment here. It's like, okay, no problem. So we walk into Crow.

00:05:00 - 00:05:40 | Speaker 1:

and we each go grab our own carts and we just start pushing around which by the way it took me a while to find her i think she was hiding from me i think she wasn't necessarily wanting to play the game but when i finally ended up uh finding her oh my god what was your pick-up line well first off i would you like to know where we were in front of when i found her yes i found her in front of the butter area okay okay and so i asked her questions about butter and i you know I don't know much about butter. I'm like, hey, have you ever used this kind of butter? And she looks at me like, you are so dumb. And she's like, no, don't you know what kind of butter I use? And I'm like, okay, play the game, play it along.

00:05:40 - 00:05:41 | Speaker 2:

But that would be Chels.

00:05:41 - 00:06:12 | Speaker 1:

Yes, she would. She'd be like, look at my cart. Do I have it in there and stuff? And she goes, no, I haven't used that kind of butter. And I'm like, would you like to use it with me? And I'm like doing this whole thing. And there is a guy that is standing right by us who, this is no joke, was staring at us looking like he was going to protect her from the creepy dude that was asking her questions. He kind of like started like, he kind of like, and he walks over and he goes, hey, everything okay here?

00:06:15 - 00:06:17 | Speaker 3:

Now I'm curious what your pickup lines were.

00:06:18 - 00:06:18 | Speaker 1:

Oh, the butter.

00:06:18 - 00:06:20 | Speaker 3:

That was a red flag to this guy.

00:06:20 - 00:06:40 | Speaker 1:

The butter one was the one. This guy was like, this guy's looking like, this dude is creepy, and he is going to be, you know, saying bad things. So I said, hold on, let's try it one more time. So we ended up going down another aisle, you know, and kind of like, and I would do the whole thing, like, where I'd push the cart. And I'm pushing the cart going, looking at her, you know, and then kind of walking by.

00:06:40 - 00:06:41 | Speaker 2:

Oh, did you do that little head nod?

00:06:41 - 00:06:49 | Speaker 1:

I did the whole, like, little head nod. The funny thing was, I looked back at her. She wasn't even looking at me. She was sitting there, like, picking items off of the shelf. I'm like, this is not even fun.

00:06:49 - 00:06:53 | Speaker 3:

Her whole idea for this assignment was to get you to stop bothering her for an hour while she's shocked.

00:06:53 - 00:06:54 | Speaker 1:

Yes, exactly.

00:06:54 - 00:06:56 | Speaker 3:

Go wander around and pretend you don't know me.

00:06:56 - 00:07:49 | Speaker 1:

And for those that don't know how I met my wife, I met my wife way back when, when I was a night DJ and I hosted a Saturday night show called Party Patrol. We actually would go out with the station van and we would broadcast from places of the station van. Long story short, my line to Chelsea, because I had my microphone, and you would basically go into people's house parties, and it was a graduation party. And you'd go up to people and be like, hey, how much more time do I got? Okay, good. All right, I'm walking up this song. Hold on a second here. All right, 93.7 KRQ, it's Party Patrol, and Mojo hanging out. And I'd be like, hey, how you doing? What's your name? Where are you from? And they would tell me, you know how you do that at club gigs and stuff? So I walk up to Chelsea, and I go, 93.7 KRQ, it's Party Patrol. Hey, hi, I'm Mojo. And she goes, who cares? Yes, I'm Mojo.

00:07:49 - 00:07:51 | Speaker 2:

I love that line.

00:07:51 - 00:08:36 | Speaker 1:

And at that moment, I knew I'm going to impregnate her three times. Bow. But all right, I wanted it. So I want you guys to tell me, if you are one of those people that role plays, you got to tell me, and we can't get dirty because we got kids and stuff that listen, but where did you do the role playing? Because I was having this conversation with one of Chelsea's friends later in the night telling her the story about this. And she told me that she and her husband met at MSU and they role played in the library at MSU. Like picking up in the library. I guess there's a floor of that library that's supposedly a dirty.

00:08:36 - 00:08:38 | Speaker 3:

I'm trying to remember the name of it. They all call it this.

00:08:40 - 00:08:53 | Speaker 1:

There's a dirty floor that the Spartans love to meet at. and so they pick up at that place and I thought that's a wild place to go to a library I mean for me to go to a library

00:08:53 - 00:08:59 | Speaker 2:

so for you it stopped in the butter aisle like you guys didn't carry it home

00:08:59 - 00:09:47 | Speaker 1:

no we no yeah no actually this is the funny thing Chelsea refuses to let me put the groceries away she does not think I'm a good she said there's an art to putting the groceries away like she likes to I don't understand this I just take things out of the bag and throw it wherever it's supposed to be. She takes everything out of the bag, lays it on the counter, and then puts it all away. And to me, that's a entire waste of time. You know what I mean? Like, honestly, I have put stuff away in the cabinet in its bag. I just leave it right in the little bag of the bag. Like, why not? And then we might need that bag sometime, you know? I'm not very good at doing stuff. Which, by the way, the way I put groceries away is the way I also bake cookies. Very slobby. What's up, Kaylee?

00:09:48 - 00:09:49 | Speaker 2:

Hey, good morning. How are you?

00:09:50 - 00:09:50 | Speaker 1:

Good. What's happening?

00:09:51 - 00:09:59 | Speaker 2:

Good. I just wanted to say that I wish we had more men in the world like the guy trying to help Chelsea at the store. That is true.

00:10:00 - 00:10:08 | Speaker 4:

He was actually a very nice guy. Yeah. Oh, yeah? Yeah. We need to have more guys protecting women out there that are willing to do that.

00:10:09 - 00:10:19 | Speaker 6:

Oh, yeah. There's been so many situations where, like, there's been some weird things said to me, and I look around, like, is anybody, like, hearing this? Or, you know, how do I get out of this right now?

00:10:19 - 00:10:20 | Speaker 5:

Are you in the butter aisle, too?

00:10:21 - 00:10:23 | Speaker 6:

I was definitely in the butter aisle.

00:10:23 - 00:10:53 | Speaker 4:

Yeah. You know what's wild is that sometimes I have been in places where I've noticed things just didn't seem right and I just stay there for a while just to see if it escalates to something and then I find out that's just how like couples will talk to each other and I'm like oh my gosh this is like really wild like we're they're like husband or even in one case I thought these kids were like being really rude to this lady and it turned out that they were her kids and I'm like

00:10:53 - 00:10:56 | Speaker 6:

oh yeah you're like oh this is your relationship okay

00:10:56 - 00:10:59 | Speaker 4:

what's up Monique

00:10:59 - 00:11:32 | Speaker 8:

good morning how you doing what's going on pretty good i'm actually walking into meyer so i have to be kind of quiet oh are you gonna role play no unfortunately not uh my husband and i oftentimes we're out at the public htm i'll walk up and i'll talk to him like so what are you trying to get tonight and he'll say something like you know whatever you offer you You know, like, I want the words. And I'll go over my hours, and I'm like, you know, well, if you want me to stay tonight, it's going to be 7.50. Wait a minute.

00:11:32 - 00:11:41 | Speaker 5:

So when he's at the ATM, you're pretending to be a prostitute? You're going to get arrested. Oh, my God. If anybody overhears that, they're going to call the cops.

00:11:42 - 00:11:49 | Speaker 7:

Has anyone ever said anything to you? No, we just get the craziest looks. Oh, my God.

00:11:49 - 00:12:06 | Speaker 4:

By the way, I would love to just see you guys doing that Just because it would be so funny to see like an older You know how they have that They have the show, like the hidden camera shows and stuff Where people are like witnessing this Going, what the hell is going on?

00:12:06 - 00:12:06 | Speaker 8:

Oh my god, yes

00:12:06 - 00:12:07 | Speaker 4:

Yeah

00:12:07 - 00:12:18 | Speaker 8:

What do you tell your wife? What are you going to tell your wife? Oh wow And he was like, oh well, she won't mind I'm like, are you sure? You want to take me home to her? You're like, I can do it

00:12:18 - 00:12:27 | Speaker 4:

hey quick question for you what do you do if there's another guy at the atm taking taking

00:12:27 - 00:12:46 | Speaker 7:

more money out i just look at him while i'm talking to him like share him look at the guy's eyes while i still talk to my husband but what if he walked up to you and is like i'm interested in the hourly rate i haven't gotten that one yet that would be interesting that is hysterical i

00:12:46 - 00:12:49 | Speaker 4:

I love you, Monique. See that? You got a good relationship going there, right?

00:12:50 - 00:12:51 | Speaker 7:

Yeah. Yeah, it's fun.

00:12:51 - 00:13:14 | Speaker 4:

All right. Take care of yourself. Chelsea actually said the funniest line ever, though, after this was done. She said, let's role play. Like, you're going to actually pick up and clean up, and we're going to clean. Like, she was like, oh, wait, what? And I thought, oh, my God, that is genius, Chelsea. Like, you want to get your guy to, like, do something, like some on his honey-do list? Make it a role play. Like, you got it. It's all easy.

00:13:15 - 00:13:41 | Speaker 3:

All right, Mojo in the morning show. It is Ryan Seacrest here. There was a recent social media trend which consisted of flying on a plane with no music, no movies, no entertainment. But a better trend would be going to ChumbaCasino.com. It's like having a mini social casino in your pocket. Chumba Casino has over 100 online casino-style games, all absolutely free. It's the most fun you can have online and on a plane. So grab your free welcome bonus now at ChumbaCasino.com. Sponsored by Chumba Casino.

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