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America's Social Casino. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I talk to composer Mark Shaman. It's about the hang. It's the pleasure of hanging out with the people that you're with.

You know, Rob and I was always a great hang. And director Morgan Neville. Film school teaches you all the wrong things about making documentary. What do you want to say? Documentary is all about your ear. What do you hear? I feel like my job is listening really, really hard.

Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Kev had somebody pinch his butt.

I did not wait to hear this story. That's the story. The lady literally pinched my booty. I know, but who was she? What'd she look like? Is she hot? No. I feel like she would have been hotter 30 years ago. She's still an attractive lady, but she's significantly older than all of us here right now. Oh, God. she's uh she's pushing the line she would get free breakfast at denny really so now the thing that i realized is a lot of listen as if i didn't already a lot of people listen to this show and a lot of people that i work with and this young lady i'll be kind uh is one of our fantastic security guards that represents lca so this is at a pistons game and we have one of the best media dining areas in all of the nba so if you're part of the media or a part of the game day staff there's this specific kitchen area where you can go i guess quote-unquote backstage but in the rear of the house and eat food so i go through there and i'm always wearing a hat 99 out of 100 days you'll see me i'll have a hat on but this day i just didn't i feel like the outfit worked better without the hat so people do not recognize me without my hat on so i get a double look like very often so as i'm walking in the media dining she's like kev and i've already passed her at this point so i turn around she's like okay i'm like what's up she's like i didn't i never seen you without a hat on i'm like yeah i don't have it on she's like looking good still handsome i was like okay you know it was kind of like one of those made you feel uncomfortable kind of things i was like okay yeah you know so i go get my little tea hot water two uh packs of honey scoop them out dump them in there whip them up and i go on by my way i have to walk back past her in order to go out to like where the game is as i'm walking past her she reaches out and i guess pinches my butt and i turn around kind of and she just winks at me like oh i turn around and i keep walking there's no need for conversation but whoa i've never i've never had that happen to me in real life this is only something i've seen

that's the song my booty i can i can i tell you something though don't ever discount because of an age yeah and i think when you're at that age if if this woman is what i'm thinking her age is she can you know she can get away with anything for some reason certain older people get away with stuff they can do it but also these women are hot have you not seen some of these like i i saw a woman the other day and i'm telling you she had to be pushing 70 and i'm not gonna lie to you? She had a body that was unbelievable. 70 is the new 50. I'm telling you. I'm not agreeing. Come on. I'm not agreeing.

By the way, it's still not okay what she did. Yeah, I'm not going to start. Oh, it's fine though. You're okay with it. Here's my limit. If you can't properly apply lipstick to where it stays on the part of the lip it should, once you start coloring out the lines, so to speak, you be on the age. Wait a second, come on.

Wait, but I feel like I don't do my lipstick very well.

Look, y'all don't see old ladies who can't put lipstick on the right way and it'd be above the lip line. All over their teeth. All over their teeth. Come on, man. What are we doing? Maybe Katie's just drinking.

Some of us. Some of us. Can't afford lip filler anymore. And that's how we just make it look a little plump. Hey, Brad. We have to line outside of the lip scab.

What's going on, Brad?

We're working.

We'll be real. You do. Hey, morning, guys. Morning. It sounds like Kevin got a VIP security guard for life. That's right, exactly.

Those are the people you got to make friends with. I'm going to keep her around, Kev.

Yeah.

Look, man, I haven't had sex in a minute, but I ain't that desperate.

No, come on. Wait a second. So what is your age cutoff, then? What's the oldest that you would be excited that they pinch their butt?

You have to look a certain way. I don't want to be, what's the word? What's the word, Johnny? Ageism? No, not ageism. I don't want to be discriminatory. Let's just go with that. I'm not trying to discriminate people, but because if you 70 and you look cold, then that's different than if you 70 and you look old. Oh, that's an interesting line. Like, who did you just show me?

Helen Mirren.

Helen Mirren. She pinched my butt. We might have a conversation. Really? Kendall Reeves is a lot older than you think.

Yeah. I mean, I think you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised. That restaurant that we were at on, we were at Ocean Prime on Saturday night. There were some old rich ladies at the bar that were winking as we were walking out. What's going on, Phil? Hey, Mojo, love you guys. Hey, we love you, too. We love you, too. What's happening, buddy? Kev, Kev, you just got to have her pop her teeth out and have a great time, bud. Oh!

Okay.

Let her gum me down. Lydia, let me tell you something. Lydia, are we vetting these people at all?

Are you screening something to me that he said to you? Okay.

I love it. Love it, guys. I love it.

I love having a job. Thanks for risking that. Yeah.

He said, pop the T-phone. All right. When you argue with idiots, people can't tell who the idiot is. We fail to understand that on this show.

This is Mojo in the Morning. They've taken over cities before. But this July, they're bringing the X Games League Championship home. to New Orleans, July 24th through 26th at the Superdome. Over 100 elite athletes competing for the first-ever league title, plus Metro Boomin', JID, Subtronics, and Bunt performing live. New Orleans doesn't just host the moment. New Orleans is the moment. Get your tickets now at xgames.com.

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