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the morning i thought that this was actually pretty funny in our uh show meeting this morning spike was talking about how you get made fun of and it's for being a dad and what is the latest that your daughters will actually make fun of you about it's the dad sneeze and natalie said

at dinner last night that i've totally turned into my own dad because my dad does this and now i do this i violently sneeze at maximum decibels she's like surely the neighbors can hear you and she said like her and all her friends talk about the dad sneeze because dad sneeze includes like a loud scream at the same time for some reason we make it louder than it even needs to be and windows shatter the earth opens squirrels fall out of trees my dad i i can like hear the

noise in my head right now of him sneezing it is absurdly loud yeah it's it's one of those ones

where it becomes, it's like, it comes from down low and goes out.

Yes, I think he says, God bless you to himself somewhere in the sneeze. It's like a, that's my dad's sneeze. And it always has been that way.

Well, I told her there's two things. First of all, we're establishing dominance. Hap choo.

Hap choo. Hap choo. Hap choo. Hap choo.

Well. also we're letting it all out you don't want to hold a sneeze in and cause a heart attack or something you know you gotta we gotta build up a lot more sneeze pressure to counter the nose

hairs that grow in the garden people are saying it's called scream sneezing yes that's what it is It's like the screamo version of sneeze Yeah

That's it It's funny that you say this How first their grandfather was doing this Now you're doing this Does it come to a point where at a certain age You suddenly become your dad Because there are things that my dad did That I would go, God, I'm never going to do that When I'm older, but then you end up doing it And I'm sure you feel the same way too

Oh yeah, well it starts with the dad jokes You're like, oh my god, I'm now Why did I say that out loud? I'm doing the stupid dad jokes that my dad did.

Do you guys do something else that I remember my dad did growing up? Do you do the blow your nose in the shower so loud it sounds like elephants at the zoo?

Yes, yes, yes.

Because I can still hear that noise that he used to do, too. That makes me want to vomit. Like obnoxiously loud. I'm being really honest.

Or what is the handkerchief thing where you blow out the one snot?

Oh, like a snot rocket? Who have handkerchiefs are the worst people on the planet. You're putting snot in your pocket That's gross

Let me hold on to that for later

Can I tell you What a really beautiful thing That happened over Christmas Chelsea gave the boys And this is wild that this happened this way So Chelsea's grandfather died Who raised her when she was a little baby And the boys were so In love with this man And I was too, he was a great man He left in his drawer three wallets and three handkerchiefs that's all he had three wallets three handkerchiefs all the wallets looked the same he probably bought them at costco for bulk or something and the handkerchiefs were the same every one of the boys got a wallet and a handkerchief and the funniest was luke went right up to it smelled the handkerchief and you could smell him on this thing yeah and i said to Chelsea, I go, it's so beautiful, such a cool

thing but it's funny you talk about the handkerchiefs handkerchiefs are the grossest thing

they really are gross my grandfather had handkerchiefs and when he died my mom tried to give them to me and they were so they were embroidered jtf like he had them embroidered because they were like they'd use them and carry them around and have i threw those things right out i'm like i'm sorry there's other things i can remember but my grandpa by his uh you know his philadelphia phillies cooler maybe or something that i can use in my life i'm never touching Because then the grandpops would carry the They'd have the handkerchief And then if you spill something or your hands are wet They're like, here, wash it off You blew your nose on that since Tuesday Why am I going to put that on my hands?

I got something to wipe it up with What's up, Keith? How's it going today? Good, what's going on? We're talking about the dad sneeze

Yeah, my dad carries the handkerchief too But I was going to say It still happens now My dad has a record of 14 sneezes in a row But his normal is seven And as a kid, you'd always want to walk away in the stores and stuff because it kind of embarrassed you. But now you get older, you take after them.

Yeah. It's inevitable.

If I sneezed that many times, I would pee my pants.

Megan, I yell at you when you're in studio because you plug your nose and hold your breath and you hold the sneeze in. You're going to blow your eardrums out.

I don't care. I'd rather blow my eardrums out than sneeze. Sneezes are the worst thing that could happen to a person in life.

It's a natural reaction of your body trying to remove impurities that are getting up in your lungs. So sneezes are healthy. You're holding it in. You're going to blow out your eardrums.

No, this is a very true story. I was sneezed on once by another person, and I immediately puked on the floor. And I have sneezed on myself and gagged before. I'm not, like, I can't sneeze. I cannot do it. It will make me vomit. Megan, have you ever sneezed and farted at the same time?

Oh, no, you'll blow your A-ring out. You don't want to do that.

You're going to shark for sure.

Dad's class in middle school.

Bill, what's going on?

Hey, what's up, man?

Hey, what's going on? We're talking about dad sneezing.

I got something about the shower. My old lady used to be in the other room when I'm taking a shower. I blow a snot rocket. She come in there yelling at me.

So gross, because she's the one who has to clean the shower, I'm guessing. Probably not. But what about standing in it? You don't want to share a shower with somebody who blows a snot rocket.

I take the shower head off, and I make sure it goes down the drain. Oh, I'm going to get it.

Megan, could you imagine if it just stuck in the bottom of the drain because it was so big and gooey and green?

Oh, stop it. By the way, this was the best. We had them on, and they got disconnected. But the person who said that their dad sneezes so loud that he actually set the alarm system off in their house.

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