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The Pee Pee Song
Mojo In The Morning

The Pee Pee Song

from Mojo In The Morning

March 13, 2023 | 00:07:51 | Leisure

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Transcript

00:00:00 - 00:00:22 | Speaker 4:

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00:01:30 - 00:01:58 | Speaker 7:

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00:02:13 - 00:02:23 | Speaker 6:

Mojo in the morning. So Shannon was doing it in the restroom at the department store and not realizing people were actually watching.

00:02:23 - 00:04:13 | Speaker 2:

People were actually listening, not watching. So I hosted a fashion show with the kids on Saturday at one of our local department stores. And my little sister, Jacqueline, and my little niece, Stella, who is two and a half, came to the fashion show to support Lucy and Smith, who were actually walking the runway, which is hysterical. And so we went out to lunch at the little cafe afterwards. and we're trying my sister is so desperately trying to potty train Stella and it's just not happening she is not interested whatsoever well I got up to go to the bathroom during lunch and said to Stella do you want to come with me and she did so we go into like a women's restroom but it was in the middle of like the clothing section like right next to where the dressing rooms were and it's just one toilet, okay, and a sink. And so I take her in there and I sit down and I started peeing and I was asking her about peeing on the potty, which again, she has zero interest in. So I start to sing a song that I made up on the spot about how cool it was to pee on the potty. I love peeing on the potty. It is so cool to pee-pee on the potty. And I just kept adding words. She thought it was hysterical. I kept going and I'm like getting louder. I'm more excited about, we love peeing on the potty. Well, I opened the door to leave, and there's a woman standing there just laughing at me. I walked out into the actual store. More people are looking at us and just laughing because everybody heard my now number one pee-pee on the potty song that I was singing. It was echoing in the store? And I didn't realize because when we walked over to this part of the store, nobody was over there. And then, of course, while I'm in there making up a song about pee, everybody decides that that's the area of the store that they need to shop. So they all heard me singing how cool it was to be on the potty.

00:04:13 - 00:04:15 | Speaker 6:

That's funny. Oh, my God.

00:04:15 - 00:04:19 | Speaker 2:

The crap you do, by the way, to help these kids.

00:04:20 - 00:04:24 | Speaker 6:

So you brought her in there for her to pee or you to pee and you to pee?

00:04:25 - 00:04:36 | Speaker 2:

She wanted to come with me. And so we're trying, like, any chance we get, Mike, you know this because you're trying to potty train Milo. You know, any chance you get, you try to get them interested. Can I tell you something? I thought my song would do it.

00:04:36 - 00:05:00 | Speaker 6:

I will never forget this. when my dad took me into the same stall with him while he was dropping a deuce and I was a little kid. No, I'm going to be honest with you. It was the most traumatizing thing ever that I vowed to myself that I will never make my kids have to sit there in the same bathroom with me. Do you ever remember that? When your parents would take you to the bathroom and you would go to the bathroom?

00:05:00 - 00:05:13 | Speaker 2:

bathroom and your dad or mom would be like i remember going in with my mom too and i'm in the bathroom and my mom's like i'm just gonna go into this stall you stand right here and i'm a little fat kid sitting outside everybody's looking at me while i'm standing there i couldn't do i

00:05:13 - 00:05:26 | Speaker 1:

couldn't especially with uh with with milo right now i couldn't do a number two and have him in the bathroom because he wouldn't sit still and he would end up under a stall or running out of the bathroom and then i'd be stuck there with my pants at my ankles going milo milo milo don't run don't

00:05:26 - 00:05:32 | Speaker 10:

run no one. Yeah, I mean, it is risky. It is risky. This had its own door that locked. So I was

00:05:32 - 00:05:36 | Speaker 2:

safe with her. No, no, no. Could you imagine, though, if Stella went over

00:05:36 - 00:05:41 | Speaker 10:

to the door, opened it, and walked out while everybody was standing out there. All those women would be right there.

00:05:41 - 00:05:57 | Speaker 2:

Has that ever happened to any moms when you've taken your kid to go to the bathroom, and you're the one that has to go to the bathroom, not them, and they do something that embarrasses you in the thing? Mike, didn't you tell a story recently about how It was Milo Trying to crawl underneath the stall

00:05:57 - 00:06:10 | Speaker 1:

He did And I was peeing And I went to go grab him And once you're mid-pee You can't just stop And so pee's going everywhere And I'm trying to grab my feet All over my shoes A mess Oh my god That was so funny

00:06:10 - 00:06:22 | Speaker 10:

And don't you feel judged When these little people Are just standing there Staring at you as you're peeing Like what are you looking at? Is it my stomach? Are my thighs like cellulite? I even think that when What are you judging?

00:06:22 - 00:06:29 | Speaker 3:

Even when the dog's looking at me peeing, it's like, wow, what are you doing? You poop in the grass. I'm using the toilet. Those little eyes are just full of judgment.

00:06:31 - 00:07:09 | Speaker 2:

I'm not kidding you. When my dad took me into the bathroom, and I remember it was John's Barbershop, which is the barbershop that he used to go to and take us to go get our haircuts. My dad was going to the, he's going to John. I see my dad's hairy legs with his pants around his ankles, and him, you know. I'm like, oh, my God. God love you, Dad, but please don't do that. And then make your son have to sit there in there with you while you're finishing up the whole damn thing. 844-MOJO-LIVE, 844-665-6548. Good morning. Hi, it's Mojo in the morning.

00:07:10 - 00:07:27 | Speaker 7:

Hi, I have a funny story about bathroom stalls. So my niece, when she was probably, I don't know, three or four, was changing with her dad in a bathroom, changing out of her bathing suit. And she looked up at her dad and said, Ew, Daddy, you have a tail.

00:07:31 - 00:07:33 | Speaker 2:

Mojo in the morning, what's up, Donna?

00:07:34 - 00:07:35 | Speaker 4:

Hey, Mojo, how you guys doing?

00:07:36 - 00:07:36 | Speaker 2:

We're good. What's up?

00:07:37 - 00:07:55 | Speaker 4:

Hey, listen, so I was taking my son, he's like 35 now, I was taking him into the bathroom with me at Target. And I had to go in the stall because we were the only ones there. So I had been teaching him the potty train, using the correct language. And he goes, so I go to squat. He goes, Mommy, he was mortified. Where's your penis?

00:07:55 - 00:07:56 | Speaker 9:

I was mortified.

00:07:57 - 00:08:05 | Speaker 5:

Oh, you're not mortified. And the stall was just like snickering at me. I was mortified. I was so embarrassed.

00:08:07 - 00:08:11 | Speaker 2:

That's funny. What's going on, Ryan? How are you? It's Mojo in the morning.

00:08:12 - 00:08:41 | Speaker 6:

So, morning, guys. You know, Joanne Fabrics, I think they put something in the air to make you shart in your pants. And I had my four-year-old stepson, and I was, like, new to the stepmom thing. And I'm like, you've got to come in the bathroom with me. Like, I farted, and I didn't just fart. And I had to change my underwear. And he came out to Joanne Fabrics and was, like, gagging. And he was like, it stinks. She had to throw her underwear away in there. Oh, no.

00:08:42 - 00:08:43 | Speaker 2:

He's telling everybody this?

00:08:44 - 00:08:45 | Speaker 6:

Everybody in the store.

00:08:46 - 00:08:48 | Speaker 2:

Oh, my God.

00:08:48 - 00:08:48 | Speaker 3:

My goodness.

00:08:49 - 00:09:00 | Speaker 2:

There is something. You bring up a really good point, Ryan. There are certain stores that when you go into them, they must cause you to get so excited or something that it causes your digestive system.

00:09:00 - 00:09:03 | Speaker 10:

HomeGoods, Marshalls, TJ Maxx. All of them. Seriously.

00:09:03 - 00:09:19 | Speaker 2:

I always got to pee in Home Depot and Lowe's. And that's the other one, too. That's another one. And maybe it was back in the day. You remember Home Depot used to sell hot dogs at the front of the store? I'm still pissed they don't anymore. Maybe it was the hot dog that I ate at the Home Depot that caused me to get that way. What's up, Lisa? It's Mojo in the Morning.

00:09:21 - 00:09:49 | Speaker 8:

Speaking of Home Depot and hot dogs, we were actually at a Lowe's bathroom, and my daughter and I went in to use it, and we're in the stall together, and the lady next to us farted extremely loud. And my daughter, with no filter, a little kid, says, Ew, Mama, she nasty. And I was so mortified. I had to, like, grab her out and just leave the store.

00:09:51 - 00:09:53 | Speaker 2:

Did you even look up to see what she looked like?

00:09:54 - 00:09:58 | Speaker 8:

I just looked at her shoes to make sure, like, we did not cross paths.

00:10:00 - 00:10:03 | Speaker 3:

Thank you for the call. Take care of yourself, Lisa.

00:10:04 - 00:10:04 | Speaker 2:

Thanks, bye-bye.

00:10:05 - 00:10:20 | Speaker 3:

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