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Shannon back from vacation took the time to be with the kids this was just a vacation for you and your two kids and then I know that by the way shout out to to Wes I want to say this that I saw Wes's social he did the drop-off of Kieran at Michigan State and it looks so cool in this and I know how difficult the first drop-off is Wes so I can only imagine how that must have been kind of a little bit stressful a little uh emotional or a lot emotional yeah and uh and i bet you karen's shining like a he i texted him yesterday i said how's it going over

there and he's like it's amazing that was his response two words it's amazing it's cool there's something that made me so happy because you know yeah you worry i was homesick my first couple of days of cop my first couple of weeks of college but he seems to be loving it so you're hanging

out with uh lucy and smith and this is something that annually you guys do together yeah we go to

the same place every single summer, um, which is Vail, Colorado. It is my happy place. It is their happy place. We just, we love being in the mountains and, um, there's all sorts of things that we, we do when we go. And one of, one of them is you can take a gondola to the top of the mountain and they have all of these different activities up there. So you can, they have like a mountain coaster they have rock climbing they have um like those uh what are they called like the obstacle the ropes courses that you can do um tubing all sorts of like really fun summer activities and we do the same ones every year um this this year something happened though that i was not at all ready to navigate and i feel like i need advice from other parents who have been in this situation before so some of these activities require harnesses and waivers and all of those you know good things because they're slightly dangerous well this year I noticed that some of the activities required the kids to get weighed and so for one of the activities Lucy who's 11 she's going into sixth grade heard her weight and she could not stop focusing on it so they weighed her and she looked at me with this look on her face and she goes mom i weigh 93 pounds and i was like i don't know lou i i guess you know i i didn't hear what he had said and she goes that's so much does that mean i'm fat as the mom of a tween girl that is really terrifying to hear because i thought to myself where in the heck all of a sudden did this become a thing we're kids actually where where she is now concerned with what she weighs is that fat um it just like i don't know i did not like i i i think to myself i never talk about my weight around her always try to speak very positively about you know the way i look and the way other people look so i'm thinking where in the heck is this coming from and it's just it's scary too to know i have friends whose daughters are a little bit older than lucy but they've they are navigating you know um disordered eating and different things like that and like where does this start at that age

and they're the same age and they start thinking about that yes well we live in i don't even know It's such an influencer Instagram world where everybody's, you know, taking pictures and doing all this stuff.

And then you put on that, you add the layer of, quote unquote, the world telling you what beauty looks like.

Yeah.

And if you don't fit that mode, then you feel as though something's wrong with you. Yeah.

And then I'm going, I was not prepared to have that discussion with her. I don't even know if what I said to her was the right thing about how- What did you? how I told her that we should not be worried about weight, that she is healthy. And I talked about how she is an athlete and she is building muscle and that I don't even know if I was supposed to say this, but I was like, muscle weighs more than fat and strong is so healthy. And like, I kept emphasizing, you are healthy. You are healthy. Like we do not need to be worried about our weight. And then I'm like, I don't, I just had not thought that that was going to be, and maybe naively so a discussion this early on did you or your sisters go through anything like

that around her age or maybe a little older or whatever um i can remember myself like looking

i think i was i was maybe around her age actually kev now that i think about it looking at my tummy and you know how after you eat your tummy like protrudes a little bit and telling my grandma oh it looks like i have a big belly and my grandma talking to me my grandma actually lifted up her shirt and she's like this is a big belly you do not have a big belly um and maybe i was in middle

school but um you know what makes what makes me sad is that uh and i and i know this has been going on way before even probably instagram and facebook where kids had to deal with with this but it makes me sad that it's in your face every single day that kids are that everybody not just kids i mean there's adults that are the same way that they see what like you said kev beauty supposedly looks like and then everything is weight loss and you know uh people taking shots and doing things like that and then you just see that thrown in your face and then you see like these celebrities and how they look and you know and honestly you don't see what i call normal you know what i mean on on any social media at all so it's tough for the teacher children to love

themselves for who they are right when you know either success or your job or how many people quote-unquote like you in real life is totally based on this illusion that this is how you're supposed to look when none of that's s-h-i-t and i could and boys go through it boys go through this too by the way this has been like josiah i feel like josiah has been dealing with this for like two years maybe three years where he's come home and been like i'm fat or like i'm thick or like somewhere he'll like, he'll like pinch his chest. And if he can like pull some, some skin up, he'll be like, I got titties. And to your point, I did what my grandma said. I'm like, nah, bro, these titties. It's a whole different level what you want.

And honestly, kids probably, and I would assume that this is maybe happens with the kids in school is that they, that's the first thing that they go after the kids for is they make fun of them by their looks. Courtney, what's up? It's Mojo in the morning. Hi.

Hi, good morning. First off, my heart just breaks for Lucy. And I feel like you handled it so well, Shannon. I had my oldest daughter does gymnastics, and she had a little girl on her team call her fat. And it was devastating, and it was just horrible, but it gave us the opportunity to share with her that she's strong and that she's healthy and that everything that she does is helping her, like, just do everything every day. Having her eat, it helps her go to school. It helps her walk. It helps her run. and so we just really focused on how feeding yourself healthy foods is so good because it

helps you be strong and you can do day-to-day things you know it's that sport alone it probably has a tough one so much it is you know the coaches are probably just as brutal as some of the kids

sometimes probably i mean honestly her coach handled it very very well she immediately talked to parents i mean they they handled it so well but it was so hard because it's it's hard because it's all different ages and so it's hard for them to see like to know the difference of just being strong and um i mean it was it was hard but she i mean she's doing great now but it's so good to talk to them about just getting stronger and doing strength and even i like them to see me lifting weights because i tell them that i'm lifting weight so that i can lift you guys up i can walk up the stairs and so i think it's healthy for them to see that and see that we're doing it just to do our day to day

task and that's that's what they need to be doing yeah thank you for the call what's up jennifer how you doing hey good morning guys how are you good morning we're good what's happening um so i've been dealing with this with my teenager for over a little over a year now um she has always thought that she was fat which is wild and she lost um 15 pounds since march of this year she's down to 115 pounds and she still thinks she's fat and she's 17 17 she just turned 17 in july and she's

115 pounds but also like what's her height and stuff like i i think the problem is they look at the number and they don't understand you know that's where that's where you got to have like

a medical professional that that talks to them exactly yep well we just had her yearly physical and her doctor said that he wanted her to gain some weight because of her height yeah and she looked at me like she was disgusted with having to gain weight that's the problem you can't put

you can't put a number on this and when they once they put a number on it is bad like honestly i hate to say this but the the people that did the weigh-in thing for lucy should never have said

what her weight was out loud no like it shouldn't as soon as she heard it it was like i was so taken aback by her reaction because that is just not and and i gotta be honest with you you gotta be

careful and i know you say you don't do this but you gotta be careful because you do post a lot of stuff on social media but let your kids you know kids need to see one of the greatest things ever was when I saw my parents' flaws. You know what I mean? And I think we have to show our kids that it's okay to not be okay and it's also okay to not be perfect. You know, like there's so much competing in this world. Everybody competes for everything. And I think it's such bull crap that we live in a society that does that. I mean, I'm telling you, these damn phones, you know, they were talking about the schools, the amount of schools that want to get rid of the phones in schools. And what it's done in the schools that have had no phones in the classrooms and they say what it did was it made the kids actually have to have conversations with others and communicate and the conversations they said was better than them pointing stuff out that they're seeing by showing tiktoks to each other yeah because nowadays we don't we we everything we look at is based on the perfectness of whatever

the post is competition is rooted in the fabric of america well like that's that's who we are bro

But you can't compete. Listen, I can't say I'm better than you because I'm better looking than you. I totally agree. And I think that's the thing. How about this? I am just as good as you is better than saying I'm better.

I completely agree. But, like, competition is rooted in who we are.

But it always has. But don't you think it's worse than it ever has been? Where people compete for the post. They compete. You know, people, all they do is they look at the likes.

Maybe not compete, but compare.

I would lean in that direction.

more what's up elizabeth hi hi guys good morning how are you we're okay what's going on competing

um i just wanted to weigh in about i actually struggled with the same thing with my daughter she's only nine she's going to be 10 here in a couple of months but um i noticed she was just wearing like a ton of makeup lately and she kind of was asking for a skincare routine and my husband and i were like you know you don't really need that you're not even really a preteen yet and then um a couple weeks ago i actually walked into her room and she was doing a flat tummy workout out and i was like why are you doing this like who is this for and how old again is she crying she's only nine and so she's sort of crying and she's like i think i'm getting a bigger stomach and so you know i kind of had a talk with her i was like you know your body's just changing you're just becoming a woman that doesn't mean you're fat and she's a tall girl she's really tall she taller than her 10 year old brother and she's got some you know she's got bigger feet than him so i think it really just like kind of like all like boiled down to she was like i'm getting fat And then we actually, my husband and I had a discussion and we were like, you know, no more YouTube, like just cut that out of your life because she was seeing all these like teenage girls doing all these things. And it's, she just was like trying to do the same thing. But I talked to a lot of girls, like teachers and, um, other parents and they're like, it's just like getting younger and younger. Like these girls are trying to change their bodies at such a young age. It's so sad.

Yeah. It's, it's unbelievable. Nine years old and you're doing stomach flattening workouts. I mean, I mean, I don't know, man, I just it's, you know, and I know that there were girls that were my sister had an eating disorder and I never, you know, knew what an eating disorder was until she literally, you know, my parents had to had to put her in a hospital because it was so bad. And I will say this to you that I know that they've always been around, but I think that worse than ever is.

because of the social media aspects of things and how things are, you know, everybody compares and wants to be others. You know what I mean? Nobody wants to be themselves. Like I'm always amazed whenever I hear somebody say that they don't have social media. Like I always look and go, Oh my God. Like that, that would seems like, well, my, my first thought is, Oh, that's kind

of weird. But then the more and more you think about it, I'm like, I actually applaud that

person. Their brain is probably so good. And I know that your kids in your kids, uh, don't have a phone because you and their dad chose not to do that i think that can you imagine if they don't

have a phone but to be fair like they still have an ipad so they can watch youtube you know like it's it's still it's still accessible it's still there it's it's it's all freaking bad wow but

well uh you know listeners were texting there's one particular that keeps texting saying please do a psa about eating disorders i i wish i could i just don't know enough about it but i will say this that that might be something that we look at later uh on the show to have somebody on with us that can can discuss with us you know where parents could go that's children are dealing

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