Muse

Hey, Story Pirates podcast listeners, Lee here. Welcome to Story Pirates Summer. I'm super excited because today we are revealing the Summer Story Challenge Leaderboard. You can check it out at storypirates.com slash leaderboard, where I'm proud to say that a whole bunch of you have already sent in a whole bunch of stories. Now, you'll notice when you look at the leaderboard that there are a lot of ties right now, which makes sense. And of course, I have to shout out our first leaderboard leader. Congrats to Tabitha in Arizona. Tabitha has already sent in many stories, but don't get freaked out by her early lead because Vivi in Connecticut, Jane in Florida and Rory in Kansas are right behind her. And it's early in the summer. There is so much time left for everyone to write stories. And speaking of kids who aren't on the leaderboard yet, shout out to David in Georgia who says, I heard about the Summer Story Challenge and I would like to commit in it. I will be sending in a ton of stories. And a shout out to George and Arthur from Canada who tells that they are writing stories together all summer, which is awesome. I just can't believe how amazing the Summer Story Challenge is already, and there is so much time to get involved. We want to read as many stories as we can. We'll be updating the leaderboard weekly at storypirates.com slash leaderboard, and I'll be shouting out more kids here on the podcast. Grownups, you can find links to the leaderboard and find out how to get your kids involved in the Summer Story Challenge in the show notes for today's episode. Okay, on to today's brand new episode after a few more words for the grown-ups.

I love story pirates.

It just filled me up with joy. My mom loves the jokes. I just try to, like, put myself in their shoes and just imagine if I was at the bad poetry class what I would want to write about.

I definitely think I can be more creative now. I'm the champion!

The Story Pirates.

It's the Story Pirates podcast. Have you ever felt like sitting down to write something, but you were afraid it would turn out badly? Well, have you considered trying to make it bad? Because sometimes trying to make something bad means it turns out good. Like in today's brand new story. Here's the

author to introduce it. Hi, my name is Petra. I'm 12 and I live in Canada. This is my story, Bad Poetry Class.

Hurry up, Bob. It's time for the news.

I'm just getting our news-watching snacks. Coffee crisps, caramilks, and ketchup chips.

We live in Canada, and this is what snacks are here.

You don't gotta tell me. I, too, am Canadian. Shh! It's starting!

Hello, people of Normalville, Canada. I'm Liz Boucher. Tonight in Canadian news, the flag is still a maple leaf. It's Poutine Fest in Montreal. But first, let's throw it over to our weatherman, Tom Laflotte. Tom, what weather can we expect in Canada today? Well, I hope you like sunny skies.

I do. Because next week is going to be quite sunny. But today is going to be cloudy with an 80% chance of rain.

No.

What's wrong, Ellie?

I don't like rain. We're kids, Bob. We should be outside enjoying Canada's many national parks.

We could go to something indoors, like a poetry class.

There are so many poetry classes available to us. Which one should we choose?

Are you wondering which poetry class to go to? Who said that?

It was the woman in that commercial on TV. Is she talking to us?

Oh, I'm talking to you, cats and kittens. I'm Pauline, and everyone is learning poetry these days, you dig? But you can be different, special, a real, one-of-a-kind, cool doggie. Me? Yes, you!

Me?

Yes, you! What about me? I already said you! Now listen up, smooth snakes. We all know and love poetry, right? But what if poetry was bad? Bad poetry? Bad poetry. Bad poetry class. Just use that dial horn and call 1-800-BAD-POETRY-CLASS-101.com. It's totally free.

Just one dollar each, or as we call one dollar here in Canada, one loonie.

Wait, it's free, and it costs one loonie? I don't think this is a good idea, Ellie.

Come on, Bob. You say no to everything.

No, I don't.

Sometimes you have to just try things. What are you doing? I'm calling that poetry lady. Hello? Yes? Yes? Yes? No! Yes. Okay, bye.

What'd she say?

She said to come to 101 Bad Poetry Lane for the class. She said it's totally free, but we can't forget to bring our loonies.

Ellie, we can't just go to some random address we've never heard of.

I'm already in the car. Are you coming or not? Okay, fine. To the poetry class. Welcome to Bad Poetry Class, Cool Cucumbers. This class is totally free, but don't forget to clink your loonies down on the desk. Here in Canada, our dollars are coins, not paper.

I know. I, too, am Canadian.

All right, my low-down hounds. Let's get started. A few rules when it comes to bad poetry. It does not rhyme, and the sentences are not in order. Here's an example. And to accompany me on this poem is the wonderful, beautiful human soul, Johnny Bongos.

Johnny Bongos!

Eggs. Eggs are yummy. Eggs come scrambled. Eggs come boiled. Eggs come from chickens, bunnies can be brown, and eggs can too.

Ellie, that poem wasn't bad, it was just unusual.

Didn't you hear her, Bob? If it doesn't rhyme and the sentences aren't in order, then it's a bad poem no matter what. Now, do any of you shiny rhinos in the class have a poem? I do. Go ahead, Jerry.

Johnny Bongos? Johnny Bongos! Poems? They should be But some times aren't But when they are Is

Short and sweet, Jerry Short and sweet, just like you

Thank you Was that a bad poem?

It followed all the bad rules Anyone else? I have one Go ahead, Betsy Johnny Bungos

Johnny Bungos!

Ahem

Yeah

Okay, that one was bad.

All right, my paper dreamers. Now, for anyone who doesn't have a poem, choose a topic and start writing. This is absurd.

This class is not worth our money. We have to pay one loonie for every class we do?

Look, if you want to go, you can, but I'm staying.

Ugh, fine. I'll stay. But this class better start getting good.

Pauline, I have a poem.

You do?

Well, go ahead, little nugget. Johnny Bongos, if you would.

Johnny Bongos.

Declaration. People declare things that are not true. Things people who do not understand a declaration. These people will try to change your mind after you declare something. declaration is final, as final as a permanent marker on a white shirt. Ellie, that was amazing, but also bad, because you followed all the criteria for a bad poem. Well done. I really enjoy this class, Pauline. It's nice to make art and not have to worry if people are going to judge it. It's called having a safe creative environment, Ellie, And that's what a bad poetry class is all about. Sorry you're not having fun, Bob. I thought that much like how the U.S. and Canada share the fun of Niagara Falls, that you and I could share the fun of this class. If you want to leave, I understand.

Wait, I wrote something.

You did?

Johnny Bongos? Jelly Bongos. When you don't want to do something, but you still do, do it. You have reasons. An eternal conflict begins. What will produce better results for all? I don't enjoy skiing very much. My best friend does. I ski to make her happy. That is my reason I end up having fun. That is the result. Wow.

That was great and perfect for bad poetry class. I know you didn't want to do this class. I am the reason you did it. You ended up liking it. That is the result.

Exactly. I learned that sometimes, just because you don't want to do something, it doesn't mean it won't be fun and that you won't...

Learn a new way to express yourself. It's fun to just try things.

Like famous Canadian Joni Mitchell said, paint your soul on the wind. Let it hum its own tune.

That's beautiful, little man. Well, all my velvet foxes, that's the end of the class today. Please come back tomorrow and remember to tip Johnny Bongos on the way out.

Johnny Bongos needs the money.

We'll definitely be back, but I guess for now, this is...

end, the opposite of the beginning. The end is the closure, the end of the line, the end of the fun. It's the end, but all does not end with it. This is the end.

Jenny Bungos.

Jenny Bungos.

And now, Lise speaks with the author. Hi, Petra. How are you? Good. What's going on? How was your day today?

I had school, and then I have a soccer game tonight.

Oh, wow. That's amazing. Are you excited for the game?

Yeah.

Petra, you wrote the story Bad Poetry Class. Have you written a lot of poetry before?

Um, a little bit.

What was it like to write poetry through the eyes of your characters, Ellie and Bob? Like, did you have to change your writing style to match each personality?

A little bit. I also tried to write kind of like what I think they would be thinking in the moment. I just try to like put myself in their shoes and just imagine if I was at the bad poetry class, what I would want to write about.

What I love about your story is that you're talking about a writing process that makes the writer feel safe to take risks. And by calling it bad poetry, you're almost like enabling the writers to write something really great. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, because they're not afraid of failing because their goal is to make bad poetry.

Right. And is that something you've ever done in your own life?

Sometimes I just think that if I don't take risks, then I'll never get better at something.

Obviously, we can see how that applies to poetry. But what about, like, I don't know, your soccer game tonight?

Yeah, because you can just, like, take a risk. You might feel like you just want to, like, pass the ball backwards back to your defense for them to, like, reset. But sometimes if you never take a risk, you'll never know what you can do.

I love that. Petra, is it true that you've written a bunch of stories for us before? Yeah, I have. I looked it up before this call, and it looks like this is the 12th story that you've sent in to us.

I haven't been counting, but that sounds about right.

That's incredible. I just wanted to say, like, you have my great admiration for sending in so many stories. Are you someone that writes a lot?

Um, yeah. I feel like whenever an idea pops into my mind, if I don't have time to write the story right then, I like find a piece of paper and write the idea down so that I can turn it into a story later.

so i had to ask you something kind of specific because this summer the story pirates are having this sort of challenge called the summer story challenge where we're asking kids to write as many stories as they can for us and i was wondering like for a kid who might think i can't even write one story how am i supposed to write a bunch of stories do you have any tips for getting your ideas out on paper and not worrying too much about them being perfect?

I type my stories onto the computer after I think of them, but sometimes I put them on paper first, and then when I'm typing them up onto the computer, I can just revise them a bit. And also I think that what I love about the story pirates is that the stories are so random that it doesn't matter what you write.

Thank you so much for sending us so many stories, and this one especially. Thanks for adopting my story. You're so welcome. All right, bye, Petra.

Bye. We'll be right back after a few words for the grown-up.

Welcome back to Story Love, where we take stories written by kids and we talk about them. Peter, did you know that we get tens of thousands of stories a year? I did know that. Well, if you did know that, then you know some of those stories we adapt for our podcast, and some of them we use on this segment, Story Love. So let's get started. Peter, would you read us our first story? I would, and I will, and here I go. This first story comes to us from a nine-year-old from...

Wisconsin named Elias. And Elias's story is called Troll-Poline. I was jumping on my trampoline during the summer. All of a sudden, I spilled some orange juice that I was about to drink, which wasn't very smart of me because it's a trampoline. Son, now we have a huge orange stain on the trampoline, my dad said. Sorry, I said. But then the orange juice started to drip into the grass. Oh, no. That won't be good for the worms and bugs down there. Oh, it's nothing, my dad said. That won't hurt them. But then a weird plant started to grow straight under the trampoline. Why is it growing so fast, I said. It grew into a huge, ugly troll. Oh, no, dad said. Then he picked up the trampoline and ran. Help, I said. Me bring to den, he said. Me eat you. My dad got in the car. Oh, no, he said. It won't start. He got out and checked the hood. Oh, it's just some cheese, he said. He took the cheese out and started to drive. Vroom! When suddenly he stopped. He could see the troll dangling his son from the tip of his finger straight over a boiling pot. Stop, I said. No, the troll replied Why, I asked Um, well, uh That's it, why? Well, he said It all started when I was a seedling, he said There was a big trampoline at the town fair So I got in line You're too small, said the big kid next to me, he said Eventually, they all agreed and bullied me To this day, he finished And I swore that I would eat anybody who went on a trampoline But what about the orange juice, I asked Oh, that makes us grow, he said It was just convenient that you were right over me Will you still eat me, I asked Nah, it's not worth it, he replied Let's be friends, I said Hooray, the end

Fantastic story Kind of an epic. We don't get a lot of epic stories like that these days. And some incredible artwork, I should say. Oh, yeah. And if you want to see the amazing pictures from Troll Pauline, head to storypirates.com. They are so good.

The drawing of the troll has, I love that the troll has a little stringy beard and clearly is wearing dirty underwear.

And has a unibrow. Oh, yeah. A real angry one. I particularly like the picture of the cheese in the trunk of the car. Yes. Oh, I think it's in the engine. In the engine, in the hood of the car. Yeah, it's connected with a bunch of multicolored wires to the engine. Brilliant. I'd say, you know, I have some experience with this. You don't want cheese in your engine. It's not good for the moving bits. Yeah, it's going to be a problem. And then you're going to get mice in your engine, too. Yes, that's no fun for the car or the mice. So here's my main question, Peter, is at the end, when the kid gets the troll to convince him not to eat him, why does the troll say it's not worth it?

This is a great question, but to me, it felt like, you know, he vowed to do this thing, but then through the delay, he and the kid actually really saw each other for who they were. The troll shared his vulnerabilities. You can't eat somebody you now trust. It's not worth feeling so bad about eating him now that they're friends.

Yeah, you're right. If you're eating something, best not to have a conversation with them first. Being your food's friend really makes it taste bad.

It really does. You know what? Just an image that really stuck with me in this. Have you ever seen, you know, spilling orange juice on a trampoline? I had a visceral reaction to that. Like, oh, no, liquid on a trampoline just seems so yucky to me. But then I thought, have you ever seen those videos where they do a slow motion video of there's water on a trampoline and then they drop something on it and then all the water stays where it is as the trampoline goes down? No, I've never seen anything like this. It's incredible. All the liquid will stay in place momentarily as the trampoline goes down and the liquid stays and then the liquid starts to drop.

You know, liquid is one of the coolest things that we have. I was actually describing liquid as, like, a state of matter. And just having to describe what liquid is really blew my mind. It's amazing. You can go into it. Yeah. Well, same as gas. Well, sure. But gas is invisible. So it's like, it feels a lot easier for gas to do the things psychologically that it does, you know? It makes you really wonder, like, what's the difference? between liquid and gas. You can go into both of them when it's just a little. And it's like solids. Solids, that's a whole other ballgame. Yeah. But I feel like liquids and gas, they're cousins.

I think liquid is a very special, weird middle ground. It's true. It literally is. Well, Elias, this was an incredible story. Thank you so much for sending it in. Peter, let's go on to the next one. Shall I read it? Please, yes, please. All right, from seven-year-old Emma in Oregon, here is, I forgot what I wanted. I forgot what I wanted to order at the restaurant. Maybe something like a cheeseburger with french fries or a pizza with a strawberry milkshake. But I know it's not lotion because I know it doesn't live in the ocean. Anyway, I'm gonna sit on that cushion until I figure it out. Oh yeah, it was a breadcrumb. The end.

Huh, what a journey.

Peter, what is happening in this story?

You know what this reminds me of? This reminds me of a few occasions I've had where I've been at a restaurant with a waiter coming. So what do you want? And then my brain goes blank. And I go, um, uh. So this felt like an inner monologue. Maybe like a cheeseburger, french fries or pizza. I don't know. Too much pressure.

But then where does the lotion? I feel like I understand what you're saying. And I like rooting it in that real world experience there. But it really does take a turn with lotion and ocean and cushion and breadcrumb. Do you have any theories? Because I honestly, I'm not sure I do. Yes.

You know, that first part when the waiter goes, what would you like? And you freeze up and you go into your head and you're like, oh, maybe I want this. Maybe I want that. Want to wear out a milkshake? And then you just keep going, floating into your subconscious and you completely check out from the exchange and suddenly it's just word association. I know it's not lotion because I don't live in the ocean. I'm going to sit on a cushion until I figure it out. And then your parents like, hey,

snap out of it oh um i want a breadcrumb okay well i am not sure i agree with you i know i said i didn't have a theory but here is my theory oh just like you the kid is trying to figure out what to order and then you know like moms are always like taking something out of their purse like like constantly like a sunscreen or a lotion okay so the mom is like pulled some lotion out and the kid is like flailing they're like i know it's not lotion because it doesn't live in the ocean. And they say the ocean thing because in the back of their mind, this kid knows that they want seafood. That's why they're like, it might be like a cheeseburger or a pizza, but it's not those two things. They want something from the ocean. They want some scallops, probably. And then the kid removes themselves from the table. I'm going to go over to that cushion until I figure it out. But then my theory falls apart because I don't know what the breadcrumb is. Oh, because now

you're sitting on a cushion on the ground and you look over on the ground and what's on the ground in a restaurant? Little breadcrumbs. Right. This is a third theory. The kid is sitting there and they go, what do you want to eat? And he darts his eyes around the room and he just starts saying things that he sees. A cheeseburger, French fries, pizza, strawberry milkshake. Mom takes stuff out of the purse. Lotion. He sees the tank with all the lobsters in it. It doesn't live in the ocean. I got to sit on this cushion. Oh, it's a breadcrumb. And then the breadcrumb fills them up, so it's all good. Yeah, and the mom's like, he'll just have the breadcrumb. Thank you.

Emma, you have completely bewildered and delighted us. Thank you so much for your story. All right, we got one more, Peter. You want to give it a whirl?

Yes. This final story comes to us from an eight-year-old from Oklahoma named George, and George's story is called The Crayon Adventures. Once upon a time, there was a crayon who went into a pool. He jumped off the diving board and it was a drawing. The end. Psyche, he was blue and he was British. The end. Unbelievable use of Psyche. Thank you. No, not you, the author. No, no, I'm saying I'm accepting your compliment on behalf of George.

Oh, OK. I don't know about that. You also, I mean, not to be a stickler here, But the language at the end technically is psych and he was blue. You left out the and. So it goes psych and he was blue dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot. And he was British. The end. Which I don't know. I think there's a subtle difference.

You read it correctly and I didn't. That's a subtle difference. Lee, real quick. How do you say this word? The second word of the title.

I was thinking the same thing. I'm not a monster who says crayon I'll tell you that I'll tell you, I am

I say crayon, but I said crayon Out of respect for the rest of the world Thank you, what is that? Is that regional? It's very regional

Very Midwest, it's a crayon It's not a crayon There's no universe In which those letters spell that word What is wrong with people? I didn't learn it from reading it. At that age, I learned it from hearing it. Everyone around me said, look at these crayons. Your parents said crayons? Yeah, they're from the same place. It almost sounds like Southern, like crayon. Like you're saying crayon, but you were doing it with an accent, like crayon. It's just a crayon. Crayon. It's not a crayon. This is not a cranberry juice or a crayon apple juice. It's a crayon. Oh, I love crayon raspberry. But even more interesting to me is that you changed your pronunciation for all of us. And for that, I thank you. I would have flown into a rage that you have never even experienced. Listen, I will never forget the time I pronounced submarine without the B. And I said, submarine. You said, what did you say? Submarine. Submarine? All right, listeners, reach out if you say Summarine. Or Cran. Or Cran. Well, I think a lot of people say Cran. We don't necessarily need you to reach out. But Summarine, if anyone says that, reach out and let us know because I want to know. Excellent story. All of these stories were amazing. Thank you so much for sending them in. Don't forget to send them in all summer long for the Story Pirates Summer Story Challenge. And to read these stories, just head to StoryPirates.com. That's it for today's episode. Don't forget to check out the Summer Story Challenge Leaderboard at StoryPirates.com slash leaderboard. And check back every week to see how everyone is doing. Most of all, turn on those imaginations and start writing some stories because being creative is its own reward. Creator Club members, we'll see you next Monday for an exclusive bonus episode. and everyone else, we'll be back next week with another one as well. Until then, stay creative and stay kind. Bye! The Story Pirates Podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios. Executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka. Co-executive producers are Holly and Rizwan Kasim, Man Ulyssi, Aaron Moore, Murray Sampson, Jack Schaefer, and Jacob Vaughn. This episode was produced by Isabella Riccio, Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Lee Overtree, and Brittany Stahl. Recording, sound design, and mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City. Additional production by Brett Toobin. Theme song by Bobby Lord. Musical scoring by Eric Erson and Jack Mitchell. Our head writer is Peter McNerney. Staff writers are Megan O'Neill and Alexis Simpson. Bad Poetry Class was adapted by Sam Rogal.

Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin. This episode features performances by Colin Batten, Ben Blackman, Martha Marion, Mary McDonald, Peter McNerney, Dave Quinones, Rebecca Robles, and Anna Rock. Podcast. Stories. Creaky bow ties that smell like paper Time for cheese rings Exceptional After these words for The grown-ups Ground-ups Ups and downs Freaky-steaky Thank you.