Muse

We got a butt, butt, butt, butt, and a do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Your pets will look at Bowel. Anyone can tolerate Bowel for a few minutes. Put Bowel in the trunk of your car and forget it. Build a special room for your Bowel so no one can see it. And now, Bowel's perfect for throwing away. T-B-T-L Guess what day it is. Guess what day it is.

It's Friday. Friday. Gotta get down on Friday.

everybody's looking forward to the weekend i'm slimy i'm grimy i need a shower and i have a

garbage situation i don't use foul language and i don't like to hear anyone else use it either

we're just a bunch of savages right we're not like your fancy california friends your george clooney and your california raisins this is ludicrous call me when you're good

all right hello good morning and welcome everyone to a friday edition of tbtl the show that just

might be too beautiful to live it's like someone punching your brain but in a weirdly satisfying

way my name is luke burbank i am your host i can't believe you're still on the air coming to you from the nest broadcast center high in the sky above portland oregon where uh we're back to it Friends, back to the normal, grimy, slimy, rainy weather that we will probably be dealing with for another couple of months. That first audio drop you heard is our friend Chris Hayes, the oft-referenced television host. And you think he wrote on Twitter something like, he loves this time of year because it's when we're all pretending that it's not as cold as it is. Which is absolutely true. earlier this week it was like nice out and I was just absolutely loving it and also telling myself it was like 80 degrees, despite the fact it was like 50 degrees, but anyway, it's dry inside the Nest Broadcast Center and we are ready, my friends, to bring you episode 3,373 in a collector's series Let the fun begin And because it's a Friday we've got some Friday motivation for you

I am extraordinary

are we we're gonna get you pumped up a message for all you clump dogs i'll say i'll say what's up dog that is gonna just leave you full of excitement vim vigor can-do attitude it's gonna be amazing the friday motivation coming your way in just a few minutes also apparently uh you know dollar bills pounds pesos uh yen all that stuff is out what is in nft baby non fungible tokens are you sure that's what they said on ass chiefs everybody's using non-fungible tokens if you're using even a debit card you are 2000 and late my friends i'll tell you what the kings of leon are doing with nfts and also the uh artist grimes what she's doing with nfts it's a whole thing going on we'll get into that oh and then speaking of a high-tech advances in modern life a couple of different computerized items in my household have apparently started talking to each other

behind my back i have a beta sequence i've been working on would you like to see it and i'm now

one of them reached out to me to tell me about it and it's both convenient and unsettling i'm happy to report randy is not involved as far as i know because it would absolutely kill me if i found out that randy was randy the roomba was a snitch that would be i mean my son that would be like when tony has to put down christopher sorry if you were taping the sopranos and uh i just spoiled that for you anyway uh we'll tell you what's going on with that plus it's a friday meaning we have some music for your weekend uh and we have also got this guy the longest running noviopio of the show known for his drawings of tall ships uh speaking of technology he would like to say something right here at the beginning of the program having a star tech is not a personality he is andrew walsh and he's joining me right now from the roosevelt neighborhood of seattle washington good morning my friend good morning luke i heard a little andy rooney in the intro tape.

today. And it reminded me of an Andy Rooney-esque, I don't know, idea rant that has been kind of banging around my head. Thought about writing about this in the TBTL newsletter, but it just didn't have enough legs. So if you don't mind, I just lay this on you right now. Although you're the wrong audience because this is going to strike a little warning, Luke. This is going to strike a little bit close to home and I apologize in advance for that.

Ooh, okay. I'm kind of nervous, but mostly excited.

I heard somebody on, I don't know, the radio or a podcast recently say something like, oh, yes, she was on CBS this morning yesterday. And you know that I have a real bugaboo about this, right? Like when they start the daily by saying today, yesterday, something happened tomorrow. Like, I think what we need is for everybody to stop naming their shows after specific times, because saying she was on CBS this morning yesterday doesn't do it for me. It's confusing. Now, I know that you do a lot of work with CBS Sunday morning. There's some specificity there. Right. Which helps. But I would like to just do away with all of them. I'm talking tonight show. I'm talking daily show. Anything having to do. Trevor Noah on notice. You can keep the shows, change the names. That's what I'm saying. I'm not trying to get any shows literally canceled here. But I just feel like it's just too confusing. And if we just have a rule, no naming your show after a time of day. I believe even our colleagues over at the Minnesota Public Radio, I don't know if they still have it, but they used to have a show that was just called Mid-Morning, I believe. Right? Like, nope, sorry, you're out of there. Name it something else.

That does strike close to home For me because of course I got my very start Early on producing a show called 1.14pm And it was Ultimately cancelled and I think that was Part of the problem

Yeah because it was on at 9am On Sundays

We were just trying to kind of You know push the envelope Just think creatively kind of get outside Of that box And we got too far outside of the box And it turned out that was a very confusing name

Yeah. Yeah. I think I think so. I think Jeff Hansen would have loved the specificity of it, though. Was that at KUOW by any chance? And this is a joke just for you, me and Durs.

Yes, I believe Jeff Hansen would have appreciated none of the shows actually having any names or hosts.

Yeah, that's a good that's a good point, too. Right.

Yeah, it would have just been it would just be a hot mic and and periodically different people wander into the room. They sit down behind the microphone and without identifying themselves, they generate content. And then it's time for the next person to come in and generate content.

Just a little bit, just a tiny bit of background. Pardon me to let people in on this. The time specificity thing is so we had a program director at KUW for a while. Good man. I like him. Consider him a friend. But his technique for letting people know what was coming up on the radio wouldn't, you know, wasn't to tell the announcers to say something like coming up, Luke Burbank talks with Terry Gross on Fresh Air. It was like, don't don't lean into branding. Instead, strip away all of the branding and just say very specifically what the content is and then exactly how many minutes it's coming up and make sure that that segment is not longer than like 12 and a half minutes, essentially. So you would get forward promos that would say something like, you know, coming up, a host interviews another host about his show. But we're not going to say the name of his show. That's in 17 minutes. And you'd say, oh, wow, okay, interesting.

Well, the reason is because that particular program director had also hosted at some point, and he has no ego. And so he doesn't He didn't care when he was a host And he didn't care once he was a program director With the hosts that worked for him About people's egos And the fact that part of why people like hosting Is because they like saying their own name They like their show having a name They like feeling special They like feeling sparkly And he just wasn't interested in that stuff Because he was like that's not how people listen to the radio And I don't know if he was right about that He was probably Probably the truth is somewhere between what I think Which is people only listen to the radio for specific hosts And what Jeff Hansen thought Which is that no one cares at all About the name of a show or a host Or who's presenting It's just a stream of content And we don't need to get too precious With who is delivering the content Because that's not really how people listen Now let me, if I can, bridge off of your comments Into some gentle criticism Of my now local public radio station Here in Portland, OPB They really lean into the The people who are sitting In the physical building here in Portland they really lean into this idea that those people are colleagues with the

npr hosts in dc you hate this i've mentioned this before but they took it to a absolutely new level last week and it was so so they you know they'll say i'm uh you know i'm so and so along with um you know noel king and ari shapiro uh you know and that's fine that's a pretty standard thing because again people most normal listeners don't really care that much who is sitting where and they like the feeling that this is a team effort what one of the folks on OPB said though so there was an interview it's actually quite a compelling interview I think it was Mary Louise Kelly was sitting down with Avril Harriman who is the new national security advisor Avril Harriman should have multiple biographies dedicated to her life she is the most interesting person probably who's ever lived she became a lawyer i think fairly late in life because of some sort of advocacy she wanted to do before that i believe she was into building her own airplanes which she tried to fly around the world one of them she had to ditch the airplane the guy she built the airplane with she ended up marrying this is avril harriman's life for like 40 years before she goes to law school and now she's the national security advisor like it's she she is the most interesting person on planet earth she's also very very smart so mary louise kelly is talking to avril harriman and um and i was i was very interested in the conversation it was it was about the kashog g stuff it was about basically the the the uh sort of release of what the official u.s investigation into who was responsible i don't know why i'm getting bogged down in these details The point of all of this is the host later said when Mary Lou, the local host also, by the way, they were in the pledge drive. So maybe this is kind of an asterisk because, you know, this, Andrew, I mean, you're you're in a damn foxhole when you're doing that pledge drive. There's shrapnel flying every which way. I mean, you're just in survival mode. You're just trying to pitch. You're trying to give the numbers. You're trying to raise the money. You're hoping that people haven't eaten all of the good food downstairs where the phones are being answered So this host of the local host said When Mary Louise Kelly and I sat down with Averill Harriman Oh wow

No, no, no, no, no No, you did not That's not true I mean, you didn't sit down with them

You literally did not sit down with Averill Harriman That's not how that happened That's not how any of this works

Let me just correct one thing Because I was interested in Averill Harriman And I'm Googling, and I'm like, I keep getting this old-timey governor of New York, Avril Haynes, Director of National Intelligence.

Excuse me, Avril Haynes. Okay. Thank you for the correction. When Mary Louise Kelly and I sat down with Avril Haynes. No, you didn't, though.

No, I don't like that. I don't like it. I don't like it at all. And not only do I not like it stylistically, and this is going to sound real Boy Scout-y and me probably making a mountain out of a molehill, But I really think the number one thing that public radio offers its audience is trust. And I sort of feel like playing around even a little bit at the edges of truthiness is not a good idea.

Can I also I'm, of course, deeply embarrassed that I had Avril Haines's last name wrong. I also left out one of the other dazzling details from her life. She was like a judo champion. let's just throw that on the list of things that Avril Haynes has just done casually I believe she was like she enrolled in the Kodokan an elite judo institute in Tokyo in 1988 then she went to the University of Chicago where she studied theoretical physics while attending the University of Chicago she started repairing car engines at a mechanic shop then in 1991 she took up flying lessons in New Jersey where she met her future husband uh uh and etc etc avril hans is you know just an insanely accomplished

person but also seven years older than me so i could i still have time that's what i love about the story i still have time to do all that stuff yeah if i get to be let's see well if i get to be 51 or whatever avril is then uh and if i haven't accomplished those things then i need to re-examine

my life well you know what Andrew next time that Mary Louise Kelly and I are sitting down with Avril Haynes I will ask if she has any tips for accomplishing a lot in a life hey you know what Andrew you're not going to need the advice of Avril Haynes because you're going to be so pumped up after today's Friday motivation good uh that you're going to be able to run through walls now here is what it is and I didn't even want to I didn't want to tell you in advance because I wanted you to get to hear all of this for the first time now you and i have been mildly obsessed with i think his name is dan campbell the new coach of the detroit lions in fact that's kind of how this whole segment started indeed yeah because he

gave a press conference talking about how how tough his team was going to be and how they were going to get knocked down but they were going to bite kneecaps on their way down and on their way up and take chunks out of people and um that was again that was kind of the beginnings of the friday motivation segment now our friend drew mcgary and i say our friend in that i've interviewed him a few times when you sat down with drew mcgary i once sat down with drew mcgary and Jeff Norcross of OPB Sorry Jeff Actually that's not even fair I don't remember if it was Jeff Norcross who said that But Drew McGarry has now Written An open letter In the style of Dan Campbell Announcing his interest In becoming an NFL head coach Okay And I would like to read That open letter Now Please And hope That it motivates Everybody on this Friday I was about to ask If I could play this you're good I know it's a little late to toss I know it's a little late to toss my socks into the NFL coaching rodeo but I've been smashing the tape all off season and I think every franchise out there has missed out on me and missed out on a chance to hire someone who is an absolute dragon of a competitor I know other coaches and GMs try to convince fans that they've got what it takes to bend the river but you take all those guys and you welcome them into the hippodrome. Folks, those guys won't know whether to poop or wind their watches. Me, I'm packed different. You hire me as your front admiral, and I tell you what, my team will be a pack of clump dogs. You heard me right. We're not going to mess around. If you'll pardon my Flemish, we're going to be true clump dogs. Mudhounds. Bog predators. You clump at us, we're going to clump right back at you a thousand times harder. You spit in our faces, we eat spit for breakfast. We live on spit. For us, the spit is where the grind lies. Because I'm not just going to let anyone play for my football team. You want to be on my team, you better be ready to cradle the beef. You better be ready to gas up and take the guy across the line from you to the candy store if you get my drift. I want guys with great diagonality. Our defensive philosophy will be force majeure. Our offensive philosophy will be chunkage. If you want to beat us, you better be ready for a chunk off. Because my guys are going to get their chunks. And they'll pickle roses before they let you get any chunks of your own. Believe that. We're going to explode you like a diaper full of loose stool. You think you can explode us? Well, that won't be so easy when my clump dogs are chewing your fannies down into the turf. These boys of mine, they're all bone and no foam. They will get down in the muck with you and then lick you in the mouth.

They will jack up your keisters and send you running home to your auntie. They will come down at you like rain. They will bring the pliers to you all day long because that's how I'm going to train them. No days off. No nights off. No twilights off. No off days off. Christmas? What's Christmas? The only Christmas this team celebrates will be Hitmas every morning. The day before the next morning, my guys will come into the facility, grab a note bag, pick themselves up by their jock straps, and start laying some rack. I will teach them that grit corsens grit, and they will take that lesson right to the crunch basket. And they'll know that me and my coaches will be right there in the mine shaft with them. After all, you can't make hay without kicking grass. My men will be bastard swords. They will be powerful clump dogs. They will be powerful clump dogs ready to throw down haunches any time you look at them dead in the nose. They will be hard comers. They will be feral seagulls flying high over their prey with raw eye shine. You want to eat our tank? I don't think so. We are the tank eaters. We know the balloon. We have the pineapples. Try to ladle our gravy, buddy. Just try it. Uh-huh. Won't be happening. We're going to chomp your bellies off and then go home to kiss our wives. Wow. Incredible. And not a stumble from you, I got to say. If I were doing it, I can't get through an email. I got to say I'm impressed with the delivery there. Good energy on a Friday. I may have had to pre-read that so as to not laugh hysterically. Yeah, the first two times I read it online, I was crying. That's so good. This applause, by the way, is for Drew McGarry. Yes, of course. Over at Defector. Yes, sorry, I'm not trying to steal. I'm reading his material. I want to be very clear about that. That's all Drew McGarry. But I hope that it has provided a certain amount of Friday motivation for everybody.

Did you see, now I don't want to just turn this into us reading from Defector, but did you see the thing that, I don't actually, I've never said his name aloud before, but I think it's Albert Bernacco, is that a name that some of you follow a lot, yeah, one of the Defector writers, and he was writing about the cyber truck that was released by Ian Musk, and I think we've all seen it, and he wrote a little piece about it called Truck Ugly, and it's just all a bunch of one-liners about how ugly it is. And my favorite is, he writes, this shit looks like somebody dared Megatron to transform into a rollerblade without telling him what a rollerblade is first. One more. The only thing cyber about it is that, like the term cyber, it would have been very exciting to a 12-year-old boy 20 years ago oh god do you think that you will ever see a cyber truck rolling down the street in the wild um do you think that that isn't that there will be enough of them on the roads that somebody like

you and i will just see a cyber truck i am notoriously bad at um you know future casting or futurizing um so i mean my gut says no but i'm usually wrong about these things i wouldn't of thought that that guy could land a rocket ship backwards yeah so you know uh the design is is is weird to me that's the other thing i mean i have a generally well i don't think i have a bad eye for design but like i i wasn't in love with the look of that truck when i saw it and the one that they you know that the guy was trying to break the window on yeah that's the same one isn't it yeah that's some real like um like the thing doesn't run or anything right like does it actually operate, or did they just wheel it out as kind of like a... Oh, I think it runs.

Oh, really? I thought so, because I saw a video online of one, like, I think Musk rolled up to an event in one, I think. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I think I was kind of confusing this project with The Lady and the Dale, that great documentary on HBO, about this car that was called The Dale that was on three wheels and was supposed to be very gas efficient. And in that case, it was like they were selling these cars left and right and none of them even ran like they hadn't gotten past the like, you know, kind of just a shell of a car with some parts in it that didn't actually all make the car run like they would just wheel it onto like a rotating stage at a card show. So I guess Elon has a little bit further down the road than that.

I'm not a big fan of Elon Musk, as you know, but I was reminded just recently, earlier this week, maybe because of this article or something, it came up, I forgot about the time he shot a Tesla into space with a dummy behind the wheel and a camera, and you and I just spent hours, like, on the show and off, just staring at the live cam and how much joy that brought me. So I should remember the good with the bad.

I totally forgot about that. Right? That was cool. Yeah, that's – now he wants to go to Mars. Yeah. And I heard somebody –

They can stay there. I'm just kidding.

I heard somebody on NPR talking about the feasibility of that project. And, I mean, it seems like it's really – the difficulty is getting back from Mars. Well, I mean, it's probably not easy to get there, but – Yeah, well, there's – you know, the hardest part is getting there and then getting back. But I mean They can load enough fuel up To like get you to Mars Or at least to get something to Mars But then that's where like I think water is Discovering water is huge Because somehow that would Allow you to make some fuel On Mars or whatever But they were The host was asking This kind of space expert If they thought Elon Musk was going to be able To pull it off Because he's saying You can do it in like four years That sounded a little A little ambitious

Yeah it sounds like One of those things Where inevitably They're going to have to do The sling around Mars To get back home You know in the sci-fi movies They always have to use The gravitational pull And sling themselves back home

I have to say that There would have been a time Probably We've talked about this On occasion Where I would have been Like I don't There's no universe In which they're going to Approach me and say Do you want to go to Mars But if I were presented With the opportunity Even if it was a one way trip I would be tempted Because you know You would be one of You know you would be One of the first humans To ever set foot on that planet which would be kind of a cool experience and then you would die there which would be the part that would suck but now having looked at mars a lot by way of what the perseverance rover is finding it looks very boring i'm going to be honest with you i don't i don't feel like i need to go to mars like the the real takeaway from the perseverance mission is that luke is no longer

curious about mars did they put that in the white paper they said yeah well if we only keep the shots on the side of Mars that doesn't have any cards. rooms, then Lou will not be interested in going to Mars.

Is there a Goldie's on Mars? That sounds like a Philip K. Dick.

Yeah, like a short story name, yes. Totally.

Do you have to hit on Soft 17 on Mars? All right. Good motivation.

Good idea there. Thanks for bringing it back. Happy to.

Hey, if any of the listeners have any ideas for the segment, we're all ears. So I don't know. So, I mean, I don't know what that would exactly look like, but by all means, if you have some kind of Friday motivation ideas, send them my way. Luke at tbtl.net. Put Friday motivation in the subject line so I'll know you're not a bill collector. All right. Let's take a quick break. That's why I got to go to Mars. I got a lot of – A couple situations down here on old terra firma that I need to get away from. All right. Quick break and then back with more TBTL. Stay with us.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready, ready, go. Everybody rattle, dazzle.

All right, let's thank some dazzling donors. These are the wonderful, generous donors who are donating an amount of dough that is truly dazzling. And as a way of saying thanks, we sort of turn things over to them and let them write a little message. And then we read it verbatim, pretty much. First up, we've got to thank Dylan Ahola In Tuckwilla, Washington Dylan says Tuck homie Yeah Dylan says, I haven't much to say I like that, I like the formality of that I haven't much to say But I will say that I fancy you It's like right out of some

Is that what Dylan said?

Some kind of Bronte novel Dylan says, I haven't much to say I have been listening to the show from the radio days in the front seat of my dad's Toyota Solara.

Yes, it's working.

Wow, Dylan. Thank you for sticking with us all these years and donating. I've grown up listening to you all, and I have to say thank you so very much for being my internet friendos and letting me be a part of the Teniverse. Power out.

It's working.

That fills me with a certain special joy. I mean, we love getting new listeners. That's very fun because I feel like they haven't heard all our stories. And so there'll be sort of a honeymoon phase. But it's also very gratifying to hear from folks who've been listening to the show for now 10, 11 years. So thank you, Dylan, and thanks for the donation. We really appreciate it. It means a lot.

Keep this music? Or do you want to restart? Do you want to maestro me? Maestro? All right.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go.

Do you see what I was doing there? I was being cheap. I was trying to use the same song for two donors. You're like, no. These donors are dazzling. They gave all.

We will not just use the same song for two donors. No, no. We have to play the song all the way through. Then the song is done. And then I say maestro, then you hit play again, and then we read the second one.

How many times have we done this, Walsh?

Sarah Woodruff is dazzling us with her donation, coming in from Silver Spring, Maryland. I'm going to get through this, Andrew, and I am going to be strong for Sarah and for all the listeners. It's a very loving and very heartfelt, but also a somewhat sad message that we get from Sarah this year. Sarah says I started listening to TBTL because of Luke's appearances on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me around the time when Andrew was first routinely co-broing listening was a well-established habit by the time in 2016 when my spouse Brian was diagnosed with a large pancreatic tumor at the age of 44 TBTL was my companion through many long hours at lots of tests and time spent in the hospital for his surgery I told him that I wasn't ready to be a widow at 38 so we better not die and he kindly obliged then after years of clean scans sudden pain in march 2020 landed brian in the er turns out a substantially more aggressive form of cancer had sprung up in his liver and was quickly taking over the pandemic and his decline coincided because no matter how ballistic the chemo nothing was stopping these tumors during the last few days of his life in june 2020 it was just the two of us with me listening to CBTL through long sleepless nights trying to make him as comfortable as possible even after he was no longer conscious. I was so grateful to have something so familiar to listen to even as the wrecking ball of his death was decimating my life. and the life of our kids. I'd already been donating to TBTL, but how could I not become a dazzling donor when I realized what a support TBTL was for me? I urge other 10s out there to think about what TBTL does for them, what it would mean to have, to fill that hot dog-shaped hole in their life and to donate if they can. Sarah, we love you, and we're thinking about you and your family, and we really appreciate the donation, and we're just holding you in our hearts right now.

Yeah, absolutely. And the fact that your heart goes there, I can't even comprehend that that's where your mind and heart went to TBTL during that time. I was emailing with Sarah yesterday just to kind of check in, and she reminded me, she sent us a voicemail that you probably remember, Luke, a shame-eating voicemail. It was near the beginning of the pandemic.

Was she, like, in a parking lot?

Yes, I believe the hospital parking lot, and she was just saying, like, everything that I'm dealing with, you know, everything that everybody's dealing with with the pandemic, and I'm in a parking lot because I'm losing my husband in the hospital right now during the worst time in 100 years for the globe. And I do remember that. But as I told Sarah, like, honestly, like as somebody who has not gone through, who has not had to deal with a lot of loss in my own life, I just I take I'm boggled. But I take inspiration for the fact that people can be so strong during stuff like that.

Absolutely. Thanks, Sarah. We love you. Hello and welcome to Top Story. I got an email today, Andrew, from Amazon telling me that the toner on my printer is low and that I should probably order some more. Now, I will mention I did not buy this toner originally from Amazon. I bought it from the Office Depot that is down the street from my apartment. And at no time do I remember telling the printer to tell Amazon when it's running low on toner. And basically, Amazon told me that the printer had told Alexa that – sorry to say the name. But the printer had told the hockey puck that it was low on toner. And then the hockey puck told some other part of the app that then took the liberty of emailing me.

At least it emailed you. Because I think it would be a real, excuse the language, asshole move if the printer printed out a sheet that said you're running low on ink and it's using its last bits of ink to tell you that.

And then the Roomba comes over and picks up the piece of paper, drives it over to the bed, climbs up the bed and places it gently on my body as I'm sleeping in the night.

I like the idea, no, the Roomba picks up the piece of paper, rolls it up, puts it into one of those little capsules, puts it into a vacuum tube, which then wings its way around your apartment and then clump lands right on your chest as you're sleeping.

Now, I have to say it's convenient. You know, I switched over. This is going to get into printer talk, which I know the listeners are have been waiting all week for this. But I did switch at some point to toner instead of ink. Oh, what's the difference? I thought they were interchangeable. no toner is a powder and it lasts longer you get more pages and it's better for just you know kind of work printing like I don't print things in color very often in fact this doesn't even print in color I just have a black and white toner printer that just is for printing out the show sheet every single day and other things that I need but I bought this particular model because it's supposed to just be a work course and also the toner is supposed to last forever which is not really happening because I've only been in this place for what like three months well are you noticing that it's running out of toner or is it just telling you see there's a difference there too exactly that's the kind of I wouldn't say planned obsolescence of this but sort of like faux scarcity faux toner shortage where I don't know if it's got another two weeks in it if it's got another two months it seems to be printing fine like if you were to look at it you wouldn't but it's starting to give me that message every time um you know how what is it dave i can't help you with that like it's turning into kind of the howl of printers like it's telling me the toner's low and i have to basically override the system every time to print out but again at no time i mean i must have when setting this printer up i must have clicked on some sort of you know something that i'll gave it permission to talk to the other devices that are on the Wi-Fi network and basically rat me out for not, you know, refilling the toner supply. But I have no memory of doing that. And on top of it all, it's actually convenient. Like, I kind of like that it's got a system and that, you know, I can order some.

more toner and of course it it's amazon so that includes a helpful link to the exact toner that i need that i can click on for 73 so there's a convenience factor to it but there's also an uncanniness to it that these machines are talking to each other without my permission

or my explicit permission i want you um after the show you know put the show away hopefully you don't have too much more work to do this afternoon and i want you to go over to um randy the Roomba, who I believe is back home right now, and I want you to look Randy the Roomba right into his little robot eyes and say don't forget Roombas get Stoombas and that'll keep his mouth shut.

100%. That is the show title.

We do need one.

Are you writing it down? I got it here. I got it. People are so tired of this plot line, but it's true, man. I love that robot so much And I got scared that he was sick today

Oh wait, hold on a second Stop the show How are you feeling? Yesterday before the show You had a little crackle in your voice that you were not You were surprised by Because you had been getting a lot of sleep And you said Oh no, I might actually be getting a cold How do you feel this morning? I meant to ask you

I feel better today Maybe it was just a 24 hour Little bit of congestion or whatever but no I feel good thank you for asking but I today I was you know gonna start Randy up and first it said that the it said that his you know dust bin was full so I emptied that as I typically do and then got them all set up and then I just kept getting this triangle even after I'd emptied the dust bin kept getting this triangle saying that something was else was wrong and I couldn't figure out what it was and I had a momentary panic I was like my son he's sick please my boy what was that meme please my son he very sick there was some i don't know if i know

that or i've forgotten it may be more like there was some kind of a meme where i can't remember

who it was like it was a cartoon or if it was like anyway um i was i got i had a momentary freak out because i was like i am so i am so emotionally identified with this little disc that lives in my house now and i will just say this too i'm i am receiving no money from whatever the company is iRobot that makes that stuff makes those things but like while you and i were uh talking you could hear i got it fixed i don't know what was going on there was some clog which i cleared so good news everyone randy's fine but while you and i were getting our audio drops figured out and stuff the randy was puttering around doing his thing and then i just hit go home and he just did a u-turn in this room and went out into the hall and went and re-docked with his thing but like while i was getting some audio drops together while i was planning out the reading of the clump dog essay um all of that stuff yep he was just uh out there just cleaning everything up there was uh from a dinner last night there was some i don't know a little bit of um like detritus from uh from the the food that i was eating you know a couple of cracker bits had fallen down on the floor i had noted them i just go out there and just all taken care of just all handled and i'm just like this is an amazing device do you almost leave those like maybe in

a different situation you would pick them up but you think well randy's got to eat he'll really

enjoy this right you got to give him a purpose yeah well you know it's it's funny because you know in bellingham with rudy that the if you were to drop any food on the floor it's like that's a you know that's just a bonus for her so that kind of takes care of it i mean that's not really cleaning but at least it would get rid of the you know larger pieces of something um so i don't have that you know going on here obviously rudy doesn't live here but that's now randy has now filled that role maybe that's part of why i identify with randy so much there's a rudy shaped hole in my heart and i'm filling it with randy and also randy doesn't shed so you heard that rudes

oh do you think that rudy is listening oh yeah she listens every day oh wow well that's good we need the numbers are you familiar with a movie called the doll maker no it sounds um upsetting it is i don't know well i know why i'm raising this i my judgment says don't go on this tangent because it's just it is kind of upsetting. I'm looking it up now because I want to know if I remembered it right. It was a 1984 made for television film starring Jane Fonda. And I probably saw it in 1984 on TV. And I remember, you know, I was very little then. And I remember being what would I been like seven, eight, very upset by it. It was the saddest, most shocking thing I had ever seen. There's I'll explain why I'm bringing it up now. But it was a very sad story about i think a very poor family growing up maybe even a single mom um you know maybe ozarks area no probably not ozarks and she has a daughter and her daughter uh is playing on the train tracks and a train comes and it's It's terrible. I can't believe this was a made-for-TV movie in 1984. I remember the imagery just being shocking. I mean, this stuck with me. I'm 44, and I'm still shaken by this. And the daughter goes to the hospital, and I believe that they can't save her. And there is a moment where I guess Jane Fonda is taking all the – I think she finally crawls her way out of poverty by making dolls and now has some cash in hand. But then this tragedy shakes her. And now what is money worth? And as they're like, you know, wheeling her daughter on a gurney covered up, I assume she's just taking handfuls of money and throwing them on the gurney and just saying, save my daughter, save my daughter. Everybody feeling that good Friday mood? The only reason I bring it up is because for a moment, the sick, sick part of my brain went to a scene with you in the hospital and people are pushing a gurney and Randy is on the gurney and you are throwing cash on the gurney screaming, please save my Roomba.

It's more like the photo that's the cover from Ghetto Boys album, We Can't Be Stopped. I thought of that as well. And Randy is on like an old-ass cell phone. I'm wearing purple acid wash denim full outfit. That's more – yeah, this is an interesting – you're right that they made this into – I guess it's based on a 1954 novel.

Oh, okay. I didn't click through.

Okay. Jane Fonda plays a character named Gertie While Gertie holds on to her homespun ways One of which is carving Clovis begins to dismiss her talents And puts down Gertie for holding on to her folk art In a modern world Still her handiwork is admired by those around her One of the items that she hangs on to Is a piece of a tree limb In which she sees a figure of Jesus Calling to her to carve from it One setback after another begins to pull the family apart blah blah blah yada yada yada Gertie decides that she will earn enough money to get the family back home to where it belongs to do this she will make dolls but she has no material from which she can carve the dolls it is then that she takes the treasured piece of lumber that she longed to carve the Christ figure from and splits it with an axe from one piece of wood she will carve many dolls it is the only way to save the family this is way more complicated than I remember I find it so hard to believe she couldn't find any other wood. Right. Well, yeah, it's strange credulity. Like, walk outside. Like, you have to. The only thing you can do is split this one Jesus log that you were saving. Really? Yeah. Well. I thought when you said The Dollmaker, I wrote an entirely different movie in my head in one second. I think there might be a horror movie called The Dollmaker, too, because that was the first thing I got. Right. The Dollmaker. When you said, have you seen The Dollmaker? This is immediately what I imagined was a weird guy with wire-rimmed glasses who is scary. He's, like, older, and he makes dolls, and the dolls somehow either come to life or they control people. Something with the doll. Like, let's just be honest. There's a real kind of fairly brief window in which dolls are not creepy in the life of a person.

Yes.

Yeah, that's true. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It's basically like age one to like five. And then after that, any association with dolls gets real weird real fast. And peace and love to our listeners who are doll enthusiasts, do your thing. And also, we gave dolls away as a thank you. I don't want to know what's happening with those dolls. That's people's own business. They own the dolls. Do what you want. But – Well, within reason. But like just whenever you talk about like a person of a certain age doing something with dolls, it always gets real, real sort of like horror film stuff real fast to me. And maybe it's just because of that one Twilight Zone with the doll that has the, you know, like the Chatty Cathy doll. Oh, yeah. Where you pull the string, but it starts saying I saw that episode like in the like pretty much the worst case scenario, which was we only intermittently had televisions when I was a kid. And for a long time, we had like this one black and white TV that my parents would like put in a closet sometimes and then sometimes take out. And if they took it out to watch something and then they just were too lazy to put it away, I'd get to watch it for a few days until my dad would like remember that the TV was out. And then you'd be like, yeah, we've got to put that away. And one time it was in the basement. I don't know why I've been pulled out of the basement, but it was in the basement. And I was watching TV on like a Sunday when it had already gotten dark pretty early. And it was kind of that already mournful time. You know, now we call it Sunday scaries. But it was. And the Twilight Zone was on The black and white Twilight Zone was on It was the sort of Sunday afternoon movie Or something Although it wasn't a movie, it was a TV show But it was just in that kind of, if you know what I'm talking about That kind of time of the day For some reason the Sunday afternoon movie always made me feel sad Because it was just like, I don't know There was just something It had to do with the time of day I was sad that it was Sunday and now the weekend was over And now it was probably time to go back to school, etc But anyway I was just watching an episode of the Twilight Zone in the pitch black in the basement by myself. Oh, God. And it was the one where the doll, they start saying scary things, you know, the little whatever they call that doll where you pull the string on it. And that really made an impression on me, which is why when you said The Dollmaker, I did not think of the Jane Fonda film. I wrote my own movie that was even more scary.

I think it would, you said the absolute worst scenario for you to watch that movie. That is bad, but I would say that if you were surrounded by dolls, that would, yeah. you know amp it up a tiny bit more as far as the fear factor and maybe you can't even see the dolls because you're still in pitch black but just the glow of the tv is glinting off of their eyes oh the glass eyes yeah yeah no you actually did it you described a scarier scenario i feel like i've really done some damage here to the friday motivation that you got us so pumped up for now i'm i brought us to doll maker town maybe we should do that at the end of the show

We should leave on a high note That should be the last thing we do not the first thing we do I'll tell you For some reason when you're describing that That doll scenario It reminded me of something that happened in adult life That always kind of freaked me out But I think it actually freaked me out for a couple of reasons One, I was doing something I probably shouldn't have been doing Which was I would sneak into KUOW under the cover of Night because they had this shelf Full of free books Which were the books that had been mailed to the shows many times there were books that were never going to be discussed on the air and then everybody would just put them on this one bookshelf and the idea was like grab a book if you want one of course I was broke and in college and so I would grab like 10 books and I would take them to half price books on Roosevelt way and sell them and get money and it wasn't like I mean I was taking something that was there for free but I was taking more of it than I should have and so what I realized at some point was well it'll be less awkward If I just come through at like one in the morning and just clean this out or 11 o'clock at night and I had keys to the place. This was the old olden days when it was in the communications building. But I would sometimes they would be rebroadcasting the swing years and beyond. Yeah. So I would be in that radio station by myself. Now, it would just be automated and it would be like the music from The Shining. empty radio station by yourself doing something you're not really supposed to be doing with like the total shining like when every time jack nicholson goes into the you know bar to talk to grady i fully expected to come around the corner and see either grady or a guy in a bear suit uh you know doing something with another dude like it was very and that should have been that should have told my spirit if we can take it back to church that should have told my in a still small voice i should have told my spirit burbs you shouldn't be doing this here's the thing about

the story that doesn't make sense to me because i'm going to ask you a question i think i know the answer and i've raised this with you a million times it's always a non-starter and i just i can't wrap my head around it in this scenario that you're describing you're the only person here it's dark the lights are off you feel like you're sneaking around a little bit this music is playing you don't immediately have to go to the bathroom like that scenario that you just set up is exactly exactly perfectly the scenario that makes me have to go number two immediately any kind of sneaking around like that we've talked about on the show and you say that like you don't even associate with that you don't even know what i'm talking about no i don't i can't think of any

scenario that causes i mean other than like maybe drinking coffee or something whatever the normal things are that that that people deal with i can't think of any particular scenario that makes my body think now it's time for us to go to the bathroom it's been this way since i was a little

kid like playing hide and go seek and you you're in somebody else's house and so you sneak into their basement immediately oh my gosh i have to go to the bathroom a bookstore you're in the

bookstore and then you go around the corner is a pretty common one right haven't we had listeners who've checked in to say they get they have the same response their body has the same response

and it's like not if it's a crowded bookstore but then you go around the corner and you're like kind of in the back and you don't see anybody else you're just reading and all of a sudden it's just like it's like it's like a laxative you're just like oh my gosh because it's triggering the same thing I know this has come up on the show and there's no scientific evidence for it but I came across something that that is I think I could be wrong here but I believe the Japanese igno

this more and might have a name for it, although I might be wrong about that. You know the Germans have a name for it. You would certainly think so. 100%. Can I play something for you here? I want to freak us out while we're having a scary Friday. Friday the 5th. My name is Taki Tina, and I'm beginning to hate you. Close your eyes. This is the episode. Picture yourself in a dark basement. And let me know when you have to go to the bathroom. I just went. Let me know when you're back.

Doesn't he throw her into a garbage can? I remember that scene. And then she's talking from the garbage can, I believe. I don't think I've seen this. It's freaky, right?

A woman walks in the room. Just seeing how it works. So is he a salesman and maybe he's selling this thing? It's got salesman vibes to me, although I don't know why I'm saying that.

I mean, I literally watched this 36 years ago or something, so I don't remember the plot. I just remember this doll, and it won't shut up. And then pretty soon it's like they don't even have to pull the string. It's just talking, and it's just menacing this guy. And, yeah, that's some scary stuff. You know who that guy is? Who? Who loves you, baby? Oh, Duluth Telly Savalas Kojak himself That's right The Kings of Leon, Andrew This is a hard pivot, but we're going to do it The Kings of Leon will be the first band to release an album as an NFT Now, what slightly undercuts the story is that they're also going to release it as an album So, like, you can, if you are a Kings of Leon fan which I will let me say it's not that's not the music really for me

I can't even remember

what is it is it like I think they do that this sex is on fire is a song they do oh which also I mean that sounds dangerous

yeah well well you and I are you know probably past that at this point in our lives

yeah I never I was never it was never the right time for that for me to be honest with you I think that's their big hit this sex is on fire I'm looking for it here now But it's I don't want to I'm sure we have listeners that just love They're just big time Leon heads And so I don't want to I don't need to be mean about a band that people love But let's just say it's not the stuff that I would necessarily go in for

So this is It's called Sex on Fire I just want to see if this rings a bell to me I'm so dumb about this stuff It's a pretty long build-up. Oh, I think I know where the chorus is going to go. Yeah, I think I can hear where this is going. All right.

I'm trying to figure out if the song is actually about having sex or something else. I'm reading the lyrics. It's very confusing.

I think I've heard this, but honestly, like I say, I live in my weird little holes, so this wasn't huge on my radar.

So they're putting out their new album, and they're putting out a regular album. So if you wanted to go buy Kings of Leon or stream it, you could. But there's also this NFT thing, which is part of the blockchain. So it's not, I guess, technically a cryptocurrency. It's this other sort of thing. It's a publicly accessible and transparent network. That's what the blockchain is. Computers involved in the transactions become part of the network, which now I'm just describing blockchain by way of Rolling Stone magazine, Which keeps updating and can't be hacked Due to its nature In the case of NFTs, their value becomes subjective And therefore fluctuates, kind of like stocks Or like those sports clips That you're pretty interested in now, Andrew

Well, yeah, I only know them Because you told me about them And I heard them referenced somewhere else But all this stuff is so fascinating

So, Portugal, the man Has done one of these Shawn Mendes has done it I mentioned Grimes has been doing this They basically put out this non-fungible token that people are buying, and then it is seen as something that – well, first of all, you can't reproduce it, obviously. And if you buy one of these things, you – I guess if you get one of the – there's like a golden ticket in some of them, and you get like front row seats for life to Kings of Leon concerts. And it comes with like a butler will drive you to the concert and bring you food, literally. This is a thing. Oh, I thought you were spoofing there. No. And also one of the weirdly specific details is it also entitles you to exactly four bags filled with – each one is filled with every item of merch that Kings of Leon will sell at a particular show. Four bags of merch. Four bags of merch, but you're just like, hey, can I get one of the sweatbands too? It clearly says one of everything. And so this is like people are – I guess people are buying these and they think that they might end up having more value later because, again, And it's it's sort of its own special little token. Grimes sold a piece of art that is a non fungible token the other day for five million dollars. Somebody bought one of them for these digital art. Right. Somebody bought one of them for like two point eight million dollars and then immediately turned around and listed it for more money. And then other people were bidding on it. Wow. The art art that Grimes is making like digital art with these babies. and I mean look again I don't need to I don't want to I don't want to like clip our wings here on this Friday motivation you know we were flying so high but um I'm just going to try to see if I can find the way that Grimes described what this art is because it was really quite something um

uh let's see sorry give me Grimes is um there's no reason for me to say this other than to buy you time but we were talking about um Musk earlier Grimes and Musk are a couple right Aren't they the ones who had a baby recently with an indecipherable name?

Yes. Yeah. Grimes and Elon Musk are an item, or at least they have a kid together. Oh, man. I'm – okay, here we go. This is how Grimes is describing her – it's not even a painting. It's like a digital piece of artwork she made that sold for $5 million. dollars the baby that appears throughout her work is known as the goddess of neogenesis who battles the destructive force of obsolete ideas and systemic decay that threatens the future while representing a state of infinite infancy where she sheds her old skin of corruption i'd pay five million for that i mean i know it's like easy to kind of like take shots at it but it's like i didn't get any useful information out of that artisting i'm being totally honest with you yeah

I don't know, I'm out of my depth on that and I can't see it or anything so I won't say anything to that but I got an interesting message from a listener I don't have it in front of me right now I think it came in as a text which by the way, you can text me at the TBTL listener line 206-414-TBTL but just so you know, don't send me anything there that you want read on the show because it'll get lost in the shuffle but it's been fun by the way, Luke been getting a lot of text messages been uh what do you say cutting it up with the listeners it's fun um but somebody said you know all these stories that we've been talking about whether it's the game stop you know uh stock stuff or um all of this crypto stuff that's going on or even the fact that i can't seem to find baseball cards i told you a long winding boring story if you can believe it a couple of weeks ago about a

little i didn't think it was boring i think about that i think about that store often now i want you to know that weird that weird ass store that you that you describe where you got your what

jefferson airplane record yes volunteers but um i have ever since that day i ended up at that store because i was just like oh they don't have any baseball cards where they usually have baseball cards at my um drug store so i'll just go on a little walk get some exercise and pop into some stores looking for baseball cards i thought for sure they would have them at target that's always a big place for baseball cards and i don't know i don't think i followed up with you on this luke I later they didn't have it at the target I walked to on that fateful weekday but a weekend ago I think I had to go into the big target at Northgate where I know I've seen huge walls of baseball and other collector card uh collectors cards before like a huge wall of them everything from sports to Pokemon to to pop culture stuff and I went in there to buy some face masks but while I was there I'm like, oh, I'll buy my Topps baseball cards here because the midlife crisis continues. The entire wall was picked over and decimated. There were a couple of Pokemon cards. I said to the woman at the cash register right next to that wall, I said, if you had baseball cards, they'd be here, right? And she said, well, they have a couple of packs over there at customer service. I'm like, customer service? There's a long line at customer service of people returning things. But there's another. There's kind of a Walmart greeter. another young woman and she's kind of sitting at a little i don't know like a little podium thing with a plastic guard around her and i said hey i was told that they might have baseball cards back there in customer service she's like first of all she just couldn't hear me i don't think she knew what baseball cards were because she's like 19 right and she's like what kind of cards baseball cards what baseball cards and i'm of course wearing a mask so um and then she's like oh And then she kind of cranes her neck and she's like, yeah. it looks like they yeah it looks like they got some back there get in line i'm like well and i did it for a second then i'm like what am i doing i'm standing in line a long ass line of people trying to return mattress covers so i can get a dumb pack of baseball cards but it has been living

why would that be a customer service i wonder if it's because kids shoplift baseball cards because

i sure did i think this is coming back to what this listener texted me which said the reason you can't find baseball cards and the reason all these cryptocurrency things are really popping off right now is because of the pandemic behavior that we're we're kind of all locked in and so people are just like kind of investing and collecting things and that at least i and again i don't know this listener's name but they were saying that that that is they've been seeing a lot of evidence of that so i've been wondering if the baseball card thing was kind of a trend story i've been meaning to look it up but i hadn't but you know somebody texted me so i believed him i still

wonder though why like okay so they're selling fewer baseball cards people are more into the more baseball cards they're they're harder to find oh i see so they're sold out but again i'm what i'm confused by is why it would be in customer service that's just such an odd place for them to like why would you have to buy them from customer service why wouldn't they just be out on a rack somewhere even if that was picked over yeah and that's where they usually are and

the wall that usually has them was still there you know what i mean like it wasn't like they had remodeled it was just like i said i think it might have been oh and there were signs luke There were signs on that wall that said we are limiting card packs to two per customer because of high demand.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. But now I'm looking like baseball card shortage. I'm not seeing any articles about it, but it sort of seems like it sort of seems like this is a story. Here's something from our colleagues at Marketplace. Heard of it. This is from November, though. So this is, you know, several months back now. But it says baseball card collecting during pandemic hits prices out of the park. oh, I see play on words there. But yeah, it does seem to be something.

That's also very interesting because I remember the narrative on baseball cards a while ago was that the bottom had fallen out of the market. Like you had all these people who had been collecting, you know, cards their whole life or had saved all their cards from childhood. I've got a shoebox somewhere with some rated rookies in there, some Bo Jackson rated rookies, Don Russ. I always thought, I did, by the way, just shoplift thousands of dollars of upper deck. Upper Deck baseball cards Which I feel kind of bad about now Not so bad that I'm This has really been the show Where I admit to a lot of petty larceny But the stories I remember from a few years ago Was that like there's actually a glut of baseball cards Everybody saved them Because everybody was like These are going to be worth something someday And whereas there's like one or two of these Like Honus Wagner cards right Because nobody thought they were going to be worth anything That's what makes some baseball cards valuable Is that they're from a long time ago When people weren't saving stuff But nowadays. Right. Everything we're smart about it. Don't everything is safe. Right. So that kind of undermines the scarcity of it all. So it's interesting to hear that now it seems to be booming again.

It's so I'm reading from this marketplace piece. Who's the reporter on this? I should give them credit. Jasmine Garst. Yeah, I love her, by the way. Says, according to the site, Sports Collectors Daily compared to last year, baseball card sales were up by more than 50 percent on eBay March through May. Quote, the sports card market is doing very well right now, I believe, because it's part nostalgic and part art and part investment potential, said John List, professor at University of Chicago, who studies behavioral economics through the baseball card market. By the way, that sounds like a fascinating focus of study. But yeah, so it's not all in my head. Like people are even but even just like the, you know, the junky little and still at the at the drugstore across the way. I asked the woman who works. I'm like, how come you guys don't have baseball cards? I say, how come? I hope I didn't say how come hey hey lady how come you don't have baseball cards and she said I don't know I haven't seen the guy in in a long time I said who's the guy she said the guy who comes and delivers the cards I don't know anything about it I said okay you've given me more than I deserve I will move on now and stop harassing you hold on you know what I'm gonna ask the printer

if yeah I can if it can email the Amazon device so they can tell me where the baseball cards are i need to actually i mean i'm i would i bet you anything if i took that shoe box first of all it's just probably that the cards are not in the most mint condition um and then also i'm sure that i had like totally was betting on the wrong ponies back then i was really interested in collecting cards by the pitcher of the pitcher named jim abbott who was what i wanted to i was always like i remember being a kid and being into stamp collecting and hearing like the most valuable stamp was the upside down airplane because it was like a mess up so i always wanted to try to collect cards that were related to players who i thought were unique for one reason or another so i was really obsessed with deon sanders because he played professional football and baseball and i thought that was going to be a thing people cared about i also was really into bo jackson stuff But I was also into the pitcher Jim Abbott because Jim Abbott was born with a situation where one of his hands, he is essentially missing one of his hands. He had one small finger like nub on one of his hands. So he was a one effectively a one handed major league pitcher, which I thought was so freaking cool. He would balance his mitt on his hand that didn't have like the traditional five digits. And then he would pitch the ball And then while the ball was in the air He would put the mitt onto his hand He had just thrown the pitch with And one of the big questions about Jim Abbott When he got to the majors was Is everyone just going to bunt on Jim Abbott But he was so good at fielding So if you bunted He would just drop the mitt and run And pick the ball up barehanded He was really good at that But if you hit a grounder to him He could field the ball with the mitt Pull the ball out of the mitt with his one functional hand And throw you out at first So I have like 100 Jim Abbott baseball cards I was like, when is there going to be a one-handed pitcher In the major leagues again?

I want to look up what that's worth I was looking up what Deion Sanders cards are worth Do you have any idea Do you want to take a guess at Kind of card maker and date Are we talking 1989 Fleer?

We're talking Donruss Rated rookie Deion Sanders

Let's see, rated rookie I think that's going to be I think those rated rookie thing Oh, it actually is a – let me see here. Well, I'm not saying rated – 1989 Donruss rookie number six Deion Sanders is going for 29 cents and with a down arrow, so that's not great. It looks like the most valuable one is $10, which is a 1989 Tops traded Tiffany Deion Sanders. I don't know what a traded Tiffany is.

But let's see here. Yeah, my Jim Abbott's worth 1989 score rookie Jim Abbott card is 99 cents.

Oh, I thought it was $19.89. Oh, 1989. Yeah, that's funny. I would have thought that these would be worth more because, well, this is still the glut, though, right? This is when, like, I collected baseball cards for a little bit. Luke, I'd never watched a baseball game. I was such a loser. Oh, come on. Again, it was like one of those cringy things. We've talked about dumb things that, you know, like you hang on your wall. You're like, is this my personality? Am I a Lambo guy? Because you're just like, you know, a tween and you don't know. So I start collecting baseball cards because everybody else is, but I don't know anything. I even had a few of those, what was the magazine that went along with it? No, Upper Deck was a baseball card line.

Oh, like the baseball card prospectus or whatever they called it?

Yeah, whatever the magazine was called. It was like the baseball card collector's magazine. I would buy just like everybody was doing it. And so 89 to like 92, I think, is just like I think those cards are worth nothing because there was a huge boom there, right? Especially those Donruss. Wasn't it one of those years that the Donruss had that, like, red and black sort of splattered design as the kind of border? Can you picture what I'm talking about?

Yes, I can. Yeah. I basically I was I had the good fortune to collect baseball cards during the least valuable era of baseball cards existence, except for Andrew. I'm looking at it. Ken Griffey Jr. 1989 upper deck. $400. I had the card. I sold it to James Zemmuth for $13 to take, get this, Addie's mom to the Puyallup Fair in seventh grade.

Good investment.

I'm not joking.

Would you wish you'd rather have the $400 now?

Would the kid have existed? Right. I mean, would the kid have existed all those years later? Who knows? I mean, to the degree that the journey of, you know, I mean, we're getting into some sliding doors territory. But to the degree that everything we do somehow kind of affects the trajectory of our life and what happens, If I had to sell this Ken Griffey Jr. upper deck card for $13 in order to ultimately have my daughter, who is the light of my life, I think it was worth it. Yeah, I think so, too. I had to quickly do the math. I'm going with worth it.

$400, of course, if you digitize that, send it to Elon Musk, have him put his, what is it, non-fungible?

Non-fungible token. I love that fungible is making a comeback as a word because I've always been fascinated with it. I've also I think often misused it, but like fungible or fungibility was one of those things I learned in my early radio producing days, and I found it totally fascinating.

Is it like flexible, fungible? What is the definition?

My memory of it – let me try – why don't you look it up for real and we'll see how close I actually – considering it's a word that I've used more than you would expect, see how close I actually am to it. I think of fungibility as being like if you have – if you have – if you're taking in money into one part of the government and you – and they're like, well, you're not – you shouldn't use that money on – don't use it directly to buy aircraft carriers or something. I don't – this is the worst example of all time. Basically, it's taking money and kind of moving it through different things.

So that the money is fungible in that it's coming in through one source, it's going out through a different source, and it's sort of opaque in how it happens. I feel like I know less about fungibility since I started those words coming out of my mouth.

What does fungible mean? I have not looked yet. I have it up on my screen, but I promise you I haven't looked. I thought, and I think I'm going to be very wrong here, but just so that we can be honest with each other. I thought fungible didn't always have to do with money. I just assume that, and I don't know why, probably because I just thought, like, I don't know if something is squishy, it's fungible. I thought it meant, like, you could, you know, that it's flexible and adaptable and malleable. I think I thought it meant malleable. Here is the actual definition. Fungible. Of goods contracted for without an individual specimen being specified, able to replace or be replaced by another identical item, mutually interchangeable.

Fungible.

I think mutually interchangeable is the key there.

So this is non-fungible, these tokens, because you cannot replace them. Yes, that would make sense. So it's not silly putty. It says here, fungible. Fungible. Not silly putty. Right. And I think I associated it with government because the question of fungibility would come up sometimes if you were – if you had certain funds that were coming in and then were being kind of spent in a certain way and replaced with – like somehow fungibility and government budgets was how I first heard the word. Clearly, it didn't make a very strong impact on me because my brain is silly putty, it turns out. But anyway, these tokens are non-fungible, so there's that. Well I'm going to spend the rest of the day Just looking up old baseball cards That I used to own And crying about the ones That are actually worth some money But before I get to that

You don't have those do you? Like you can't go I do Through them

Oh you do? No I don't have them here in Portland They're in like In the attic in Bellingham

Oh but they're in Bellingham Not at your parents house or something That would be a fun thing To go through at some point

They need a coin star for that I need to just be able to go dump This shoebox Of baseball cards Into some sorting machine and then it'll just like, you know, riffle through them and then just tell me what it's worth.

But that's the least fun part.

The money? My favorite part was when they gave me the money.

Okay, you're right. I would say that isn't that kind of the second funnest part? Wouldn't the fun part being going through them and spending time with them and thinking about when you got them? I don't know.

If I were a normal person, Andrew, who wasn't dead inside, yes. The answer is absolutely. But I'm me, and so my thought immediately is, Is there any gold in Thumbthar Hills? Before I get to that project, though, we should do some music for your weekend. What song would you like to play today?

Okay, I would like to put something officially on the record here. Not that I don't stand by this, because what we're about to play is amazing. But we're not going to call this my music for your weekend. We are going to call this the Stewbots music for your weekend. He posted something to Twitter yesterday that was pretty mind-blowing. And then he texted me later and he said Will you please make that your music for your weekend And I said for you anything Just kidding I don't think I responded But I will make it music for Stew Bot's weekend Or Stew Bot's music for your weekend And are you familiar I'm sure you are With the song Elephant by Tame Impala That seems like something right up your alley I bet you that I know

That song but I bet I don't know it's called Elephant Okay so I listen to a fair amount Of Tame Impala but I guess I don't always know what the what the names of the songs are me too and um i don't actually i shouldn't say

me too because i don't listen to a lot of tame impala but i this song did sound familiar to me so i'm sure it'll sound familiar to you um well this is a cover of that song um elephant but it is by a it's from an unconventional source this is by the wiggles the australian children's band They were on an Australian TV show called Like A Version, and I believe that the format of this show is bands will come on, play one of their songs, and then cover a song that's had a big influence on them. And The Wiggles, again, just like you can picture them. They were parodied, I believe, on 30 Rock famously, right?

Yeah, The Wiggles, I get the sense that in Australia, The Wiggles are, like, bigger than The Beatles. Yeah, because everybody grew up with them. and, you know, again, we have Australian listeners and they probably, like, love the Wiggles. I find it a little, you know, the fact that the Wiggles are now, you know, pretty well into middle age.

They're in their second lineup, I believe.

Oh, this is the second version of the Wiggles?

Yeah, I was doing, I don't, I did not grow up listening to the Wiggles. I don't know much about them. Again, I'd known them more as, like, being parodied in pop culture. but um they're not well some of well they seem to rage and age actually but

But, yeah, this seems to be the second lineup of them. And the drummer, she seems way younger than us. And as Stubat said, nothing will prepare you for how hard this goes. This is the Wiggins doing Tame Impala. I'm sorry, the Wiggles. The Wiggins is my friend John's band in Texas, by the way. Check him out as well. But the Wiggles covering Elephant by Tame Impala. And I'm going to let it play for a while because after, I believe, the second verse, they decide to just turn it, they kind of switch gears and go into a bit of a children's song over the song they're singing. It's pretty amazing.

Too bad your chances are slim And it's not like Mr. Shook to get shy When they ask him who is on top But there must be something deep down In the middle down there He's not too easily scared He's got friends and they've got the feeling Wouldn't care too much if he just disappeared Oh, look, see, there he is now Coming down the stairs Fruit Salad Fruit Salad

I didn't expect to spend so much of my day yesterday going around the house saying fruit salad yummy yummy.

You know, here we are Honestly, I like it way better when they transition into that part of the song Because you're familiar, you don't really like covers anyway And this is probably a song that you like a lot No, actually, I don't think I know that song Because most of the time, I know this one album called Currents by Tame Impala I was trying to find the original Tame Impala version And then we could hear a little bit of that But you know what, I found it on YouTube And you know how my computer, I feel like when I try to play something off YouTube It sounds like crap oh that is weird but I can just play it here if you want to hear a little bit of the original can we hear the real Tame Impala version and I want to see if this is a song I've actually listened to yeah I think it's pretty interesting okay

I don't know this song

actually

So they're not doing I mean other than the guy With the really deep voice They're not doing a lot Different with it

Right

Yeah it's pretty faithful Yeah this is This is still the Tame Impala

But I'm more into the Fruits I'm more into the Fruit salad section Yummy yummy

Yeah Go around your house today Just singing fruit salad Yummy yummy Does the soul good Yeah

You ready Randy It's gonna be a long afternoon Roombas get stumbas Pfft Alright I would like to play A song from Sudan Archives Which is the name That a performer named Brittany Denise Parks Performs under She's described as An American violinist and singer Based in LA I believe that Sudan Archives She played at the Thing Festival That we were at Andrew And it was a hot ticket If I remember right So I don't think I caught that show At Thing Festival But I love this song I heard it somewhere the other day and I had to Shazam it. It's called Come My Way from Sudan Archives. Can you play that?

Yeah, this doesn't really matter, but as I'm dialing it up here, I think it's interesting. It's like Come Meh Way. I don't know if that plays into it at all, but it's M-E-H. I don't know if that's like play on words that will make sense when we hear it, but I now have it dialed up, so I'll stop stalling.

I can't jump high, but I hear all the notes. I can't be your love I can't be you but I can be true

I want to be friends. I want to be friends till time ends. Yes. And I can't escape. I can't run away. When you come my way. When you come my way And I can't escape I get blown away When you come my way When you come my way And I can't escape I get blown away When you come my way When you come my way And I can't escape I get blown away When you come my way When you come my way

What do you think? It's arty. Yeah.

I like it. It's probably not the normal thing that I kind of vibe with, but there's just something about the sort of production on her voice and the harmonies and stuff. I don't know. I just find it kind of trance-like.

I like her voice. I like it. For me, it needed a little balance when the bass came in. Like, yeah. Like that, it was then that started to groove for me a little bit. Well, we know you love to just put the 808 on the floor and let it go. Yes, I'm like Meghan Trainor.

You're all about it. I'm all about that bass. Yeah, no, I like that.

That's sweet.

All right, let's put our listener selection out there. It's from listener Danny, who says, Hi, Luke and Andrew. I came of age in the 60s. Yes, I'm old. And the first music I bought on 45s was Beatles and Beach Boys. Surf music for a junior high kid in Iowa was all about fun in the sun and that carefree California lifestyle. Now I see some of the less desirable aspects of that era, and I am drawn to the darker take on the surfing that's in this song, Mickey Dora by Amen Dunes. Have you heard of Amen Dunes?

No, no. You know, with that setup, I thought we were going for something retro, but I just dialed it up here. This is just from a couple of years ago.

Yeah, I'd seen the name Amen Dunes going around. I think it's a guy originally from Philly who formed the band in New York. It's kind of his project, but I think he brings people along to perform it. And they're very well regarded, I think, by music critics and the like. The band is Amen Dunes. Anyway, Mickey Dora, this is Denny writing, Mickey Dora was a noted surfer in the early 60s who appeared in a few movies and as an extra, but I don't think he ever amounted to too much. Anyway, check this out. This is from listener Denny.

All right.

And, yeah, so the song is called Mickey Dora, which refers to a surfer from the 60s, like a real person, and it's by the band Amen Dunes. Okay, cool. That's a good setup. I'm excited about this. So that's what we'll go out with today. That'll bring us to the end of our broadcast week. Thanks, everyone, for hanging out with us. Thanks for making TBTL possible. We'll see you on Monday with more Imaginary Radio. Until then, stay safe, take care of yourselves, mask up, and please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

Get the known fine Catch the next wave Get the mood right Dark in the way Coasting all day Coasting all day The way you're going We know what you say The waves are gone The waves are gone The waves are gone See, and then I'll go That destroyed me, man Till it took a hold of me And I feel it when I cry I can feel it in my dreams Pick your daughter Taking your time Waves are gone Waves are gone 1963

Power out.