Muse

What happened? Oh, well, it's really quite funny. I was in bed sleeping at two o'clock this morning. My wife comes in and says, someone ran into the shop. And I said, oh, what? So I jumped out of bed and all I had was my undies on. And I've walked out the front and I've seen the car smashed and I've seen the bloke walking back to the car. And so I've walked outside and I said, oh, what are you doing, mate? Like, you can't be leaving the scene. And he goes, don't be a hero, mate. and I said I'm not trying to be a hero but the police are coming and he just decided he'd scoot up the road and I just said nah it's not going on like that mate so I jumped in my car and I started chasing him up the road and then he went down a side street and then the police were coming and I flashed him and sent them off in the direction of him but mate all I had was my jocks on and I was chasing him up the street and I'm just like mate Do you feel like a hero? Oh not really it's just something you've got to do for the community mate it's like you look after your mates and your mates will always look after you T-B-T-L

Guess what day it is Guess what day it is

It's Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday Everybody's looking forward to the weekend

In this business of show You have to have the heart of an angel And the hide of an elephant

You are in business with a couple glue-sniffing squish heads

Why don't I tell you all about it over a hot, steaming mug of beer and a cup of cold corn?

I'm such a sucker for content.

All right, hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Friday edition of TBTL. Beep, beep, watch out! The show that just might be too beautiful to live. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host.

Give it up for Luke Burbank!

Coming to you from the Nest Broadcast Center, high in the sky, above Portland, Oregon, where we are looking at another rainy day.

Didn't know you like to get wet, though.

And I had to get out there in the rain for a little morning adventure that I was not trying to go on today. Oh, and the adventure begins again. It's a boring story, so I'll try to make it long. Coming up here I'll explain what I'm talking about Here on episode 3,383 Let the fun begin In a collector's series Well, we have found it, friendos The most 2021 story that could possibly ever exist None of these are words that would have ever been said in this order Even five years ago The Fleetwood Mac Skateboarding TikTok guy Is turning that video into a non-fungible token.

You've got to be kidding me.

With some pretty major caveats that we will tell you about coming up. Also, God, I would pay some amount of money for a non-fungible token video loop of Sean Hannity not realizing that he's back on live television.

Apparently, I've never been on a live television before.

Just friggin' just pulling cotton on his vape pen with his glasses on before realizing he's back on TV. Ah, just chef's kiss. What a beautiful moment of content, which we will talk about. And then also the question on the Internet today is if there is, in fact, an unreleased NC-17 version of Mrs. Doubtfire. Oh, explicit. it oh and we will we'll try to get to the bottom that as well and time permitting a story I don't think we're gonna have time for this but I don't want to miss any chance to play this beautiful piece of audio cattle rustling is apparently a thing right like I was thinking that was some old wild west stuff but no it's a very common occurrence even in these days don't kid yourself

Jimmy, if a cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about.

So maybe we'll talk about that, too. Plus, oh, it's a Fri-yay, so we got some music for your weekend. Shout out to our friend Bean Baxter. We'll do all of that with the help of this young man, a handsome young stranger, the longest-running cobro of the show. He may be best known for his drawings of the tall ships. He's just got one question on this Friday. Hey, where's the freaking gabagoo? he is andrew welsh and he's joining me right now from the roosevelt neighborhood of seattle washington good morning my friend good morning dude i think we have to get to all the top stories today because i like i'm out of i'm out of jibber jabber man we just talked for an hour and 10 minutes straight before we even started recording

recording the batteries are like dead my my little recorder here you know we dial up we're like okay let's get ready for a sound check so I put my recorder into record standby mode so that means the little red light is flashing it's not actually rolling but I can kind of check my levels then you and I talk for an hour and 10 minutes and now I'm already down to like two-thirds battery power on this Tascam because it was just sitting there waiting waiting to be used for the past hour and 10 minutes that's that's it i've got nothing else to talk to you about i'm sorry

well the good news is i have a long and boring story andrew about my printer toner

that i can i was wondering you texted me you're like i'm running a little bit late sorry i'm in the middle of an annoying what'd you say i'm in the middle of an annoying adventure that i didn't

want to be on or something right i have been telling you and the listeners about the this printer that i have which uses toner which is actually like a powder someday if i run out of my topic hair balding powder i if i was in a real pinch maybe i could use some of the toner from my

brother printer yeah i don't sleep on the cyan either by the way cyan the color cyan cyan did i get that right isn't that one of the it was not one of the toner colors you could kind of spice up the look a little bit you probably

could although this particular one that i'm using is only i i it's just black powder because i don't want any of that fancy color printing i would i when i went to office depot near my house i just was like i every single day when doing this show print out a piece of paper it's a kind of a crutch i have where i like to and like last night we did this thing called the live wire happy hour where i could not print things out andrew because i'm out of toner now but i print a lot and i don't need any fancy usa today style color graphs just black and white just the facts ma'am and uh and so anyway that's what i'm working with and uh last night i went to print some out didn't work because it had been telling me it was low on toner for a while remember in fact the printer had talked to the amazon hockey puck device in my kitchen which then emailed me and said would you like more of this and something about that was a little unsettling to me and i also wasn't sure when this thing was going to really actually kick the bucket like you know it's telling me it's low on toner but is it like gonna go for two more months well last night it finally told me we have sir we can no longer uh print anything we are out of toner and so I was kind of bummed I got through the live wire happy hour but I went to see if I thought well I'll have to figure that out in the morning of course I woke up this morning and had completely forgotten that the printer didn't work anymore and so i'm putting our show sheet together for tbtl and i i go to print it out and i am reminded in that moment it's amazing how quickly you can forget something like that maybe not maybe you wouldn't andrew but i can like this morning i had no memory of the fact that last night i was quite frustrated that the printer doesn't work anymore i can imagine that so i was like caught very off guard by that this morning and i looked at the clock and i had just enough time to run there's a home uh i keep calling a home depot office depot like three blocks from my house so i was like i have just enough time to grab this toner cartridge it's kind of a big thing um pulled out of the printer and run it down to the the place and get a replacement oh you have

one of those like the office that i used to replace in various offices i work in where it's like a big if i kind of rip it out you sort of feel like you're in a futuristic movie sort of it's like a big it's a big cartridge yeah exactly yeah so i grabbed that and i walked down to office

depot because a this is where i bought the printer b i know their whole game is toner and ink it's like the main thing they do literally it's like a section of the store and i walk in and i i i'm immediately confronted by stacks and stacks and stacks of different cartridges they're in boxes though and they all have completely unhelpful names the tr573 and the you know like so i go find a helpful office depot person and i say hi i i bought this printer from you and i have the toner cartridge here which which uh one do i need to buy to replace this and the first the first person that i talked to she was not un nice she was i would say perfectly pleasant but was so Much more short on answers regarding this Thing that they sell than I was expecting First of all there's like three or four different serial numbers On it and stickers and Things I guess I kind of thought like if I worked At Office Depot I would at some point just be able to Like I'd be able to just like Call a particular kind of brother That's the name of the company by the way Which is adding to the confusion I feel like if I Worked in an Office Depot all Day you could bring in a Print printer toner cartridge and i could identify it from 40 paces i'd be like oh that's the that's the 573c okay great i mean i just felt like this was going to take under five minutes which by the way

i needed it to because i didn't have a lot of time i'm pretty sure you have the 4d 3d 3 uh-huh

can i get that with a hat wobble so i i'm like i'm standing there and again this this uh young woman helping me is is she's not not helpful but she's also not super helpful like she i approached her she was about to climb up on a ladder i think to do something you know and so i felt a little bad pulling her off of that assignment but i was also like it's 9 45 a.m in an office depot like human contact is what you're craving at this point i would just if i worked there i'd be like great what can i do that involves not restacking this printer paper or whatever on this shelf like i just felt like i wasn't distracting her from i was you know distracting her into another part of her job so she's standing there and she's looking at she goes yeah i don't really know what that is and i said well is there anybody uh who you work with who might know who it is and she gets on her radio and she's asking does anyone know how to match this toner cartridge up with the toner you

know the one that he needs as the replacement that's so weird that it's this complicated they always have because i used to order these things for like my dad's office i mean 25 years ago But like, you know, or like you or no, maybe I'm even thinking more modern times, like you get it and then you go into the storage area behind like the receptionist desk or whatever. And there's four different kinds. You just find the one that has the matching number and letter combination. Sometimes it's even color coded. They work in. How is this so complicated for them?

I want to say I want to be clear, too, that this really ultimately was sort of not on the Office Depot employees, Because for whatever bizarre reason, this cartridge that I was holding just didn't have the identifying information that they would need. Like it didn't have anything like the barcodes on it and things. When they scanned them with their little like phone scanner thing, it wasn't part of the Office Depot universe. So it wasn't that they were just like blowing it. Jeez. Yeah, okay. I'm sorry.

I put the blame in the wrong place there. Well, then this is a huge manufacturer mess up.

It was just a weird thing But this was the part that I was a little bit like okay So I'm standing there with this Office of Depot employee And she has now gotten on her little lapel radio And asked the question And then we're just standing there And I would say a good seven minutes goes by And I'm now getting antsy Because it's getting closer to when you and I Are supposed to start recording the show At that time I didn't know we were going to do An entire hour long show before the show But at about the seven minute mark I looked at her and I said Is there an update on the situation She goes I haven't heard back yet I thought someone was talking In her earpiece I thought she was sort of poking Away on her phone I thought she was getting Us closer to a solution no we Were just standing there for about seven minutes Just I don't know it was like A weird I guess standoff like I don't Know she didn't and if I was 23 years old and I worked at Office Depot and someone Came in with a complicated question I don't know how I would Have handled it but This was not the way that I wanted it to be handled in this moment. We literally stood there in silence for a long time before I finally asked, so what's the update? And she goes, no one's gotten back to me yet.

Can I just interject? And again, I wasn't there. I'm not trying to tell you how to feel or what happened, but let me just offer another perspective on the same exact situation. Is there a chance that this is actually one of the most comfortable relationships you've been in in your life and you and this woman were just appreciating just like you were just being. You were just being in the same space together and it didn't have to have an objective and it didn't have to have you know jibber jabber like you and i do you know we're so afraid of silence like you two were just

being well the thing is i've learned that that's terrible for me because i wasted seven minutes of my life being holding space with this person when i wanted to just get the problem figured out and i couldn't i couldn't reconcile so then i was like well you know what i'm gonna just keep investigating this also i want to mention i'm the only person in the store and i know i said it wasn't the fault of the employees but it was also kind of their fault it wasn't their fault they didn't know what the cartridge was it was their fault that nobody seemed particularly sort of motivated to try to solve the situation this uh young woman and i had our seven minutes in hell of standing around together so then i just i'm just going to try to figure this out myself so then i wander over to another employee there and um they also had presumably been on the radio call but were totally flummoxed when i came over i was like hey i have this cartridge like i assume when somebody gets on that all call on their little lapel radio it's got to be going to all four office depot

employees in the store where there's only one customer right i i have no idea what happens i

like a kind of a calling all cars kind of situation we have a so i go over there and i say to this

a person who also was very nice by the way um and they were you know actually i would say more helpful than the other person but they didn't also have an answer and it was again because of the vagaries of the system but it was making me crazy because in my mind this ticking clock is I got to get back to my place And I got to start doing the show with Andrew When I got to print out the show sheet And I'm holding this thing This cartridge that I know is one of these Wall of cartridges But they all look exactly the same And I know that if I just try to like eyeball it I'm going to get the wrong one Oh yeah, then you're going to be jamming it in with a butter knife You're going to cut your hand open again Exactly, we went down that road In the last TBTL-a-thon, I barely survived it So I'm standing there And this other employee is just kind of also out of ideas And I'm just, I'm like, I don't understand how, I just don't understand how this is the system. And it's, again, it's not really their fault in that the system is broken, but it was the part that where I felt let down was no, there was no fire lit underneath anyone. That was the thing. Nobody seemed like, okay, well, I don't know the answer to this, but I'm going to find somebody who does know the answer. I'm going to call corporate. I'm going to like, I'm going to, you know, I'm going to solve this for you. Nobody was, nobody seemed to have that. Everyone just seemed to be kind of like shoulder shrugged, like, yeah, boy, that's a real, as far as, you know, melon scratchers go, that's a real honeydoodle. Just seemed to be the general consensus. Until, Andrew, your boy, Burbs, had an absolute stroke of genius.

Wait, hold on. Can I guess? Yes. Oh, this is going to be a bad guess because I was going to say somehow maybe you're, because everything is interconnected, I'm wondering, do you have an app or something on your phone that can talk to the printer? And you just opened up the app and you figured out what kind of printer you have.

That was that's a good guess. That was my first try. I said, well, let me try to print something here in the store and let me see if it just wants to tell me what the printer is called. Yeah, because that seemed to be the problem. If I knew what the printer was called, we would have been fine. But I was like, am I supposed to bring the printer in? I guess I could have taken a picture of it or something. But so I tried that and it wouldn't it couldn't find it because it uses Wi-Fi. So that that that one failed. And then the guy was – the person – I'm actually not sure of the pronouns that the second person I dealt with uses. But so that person was punching different things into their little phone device to try to solve the problem, and we weren't really getting anywhere. And then all of a sudden I remembered, I bet you I have an email from Amazon.com.

Oh, yeah, right.

In my phone from when they wanted to send me this thing. Yes. And wouldn't you know, Andrew, I found it, told the person who was helping me the name of the printer. And they were like, oh, the T722, we've got a whole wall of those. And went and got it for me. And we were like off to the races. But what a weird world that I had to walk down there and then use the service. It's probably the only time that Amazon's gotten kind of reverse screwed on this. Usually what people will do is they'll go into a store. They'll scan stuff and they'll figure they can get it cheaper on Amazon and they buy it from Amazon. This was the opposite of that. I went to a brick and mortar location, then used Amazon's attempts to sell me toner to figure out the toner I needed to buy from the brick and mortar establishment.

Well, as you were telling this story and I was thinking like, yeah, this is such a this is such a conundrum. And again, I'm thinking like, why would they not have the number like the product number or the refill number on the toner cartridge itself? And then that's what I've been thinking for the past few minutes of the story is, oh, because it's becoming more of an anomaly for people like you and I to show up at a brick and mortar store to buy this, like especially anything computer related. I mean, forget like I mean, throw rugs. I got a I got a it's really funny, man. I'm not I really did not use Amazon a lot out of like literally out of ethical reasons, you know, and also just some old manniness to honestly just like I don't know. I like going to the store but in since the pandemic I've started using it a lot more and like yesterday I needed a couple of replacement things and then I looked at the this weird shower rod thing that Genevieve is using to hang her towel up in the bathroom like we don't have a proper towel rod I should say not shower rod and we've been using like this just janky solution I don't have to get into and I was just like you're about to place an order on Amazon just I'm sure they have one size fits It's all. And so I just threw it in there. It's going to be arriving. It might be outside my door right now. Like I just went from not zero to 100 because you might be at 100, but I went from zero to 50 of having Amazon solve all of my problems. My point being here that, yes, I think 99 out of.

100 times and this is not me negging you because my instinct is to go to the store too and if you need something right away but 99 times out of 100 people are just looking at the printer that is sitting next to them going onto Amazon and saying I need the printer cartridge for 4D, 3D, 3D3 you know and so that's what it was Celery man

hold on let me sip my coffee I'm okay and that was one of the things that one of the Office Depot employees She said, well, did you order it through our toner program? And I was like, no. So they have their own version of that. And it makes sense because these are the kind of things that just are on a schedule. They just kind of like you run out of them and then you don't want to have what happened today happen to you. So you just have a regular delivery schedule. I'm sure that I could be getting an email from Office Depot saying, hey, you're due for another batch of this, whatever. But I just yeah I was like it was it was making me so crazy that I was holding on to this physical object and brought it down to the place where I bought the physical object from and then there was five different aisles of the almost exact same physical object and somehow because of the way that that we now buy things and because of supply chains unless I would have realized the Amazon hack I could have stood there for the rest of my life and never been able to figure out which one of these things I was supposed to be.

actually buy the most galling thing about this is you do have that device in your house right now that amazon device that can hear all of this and right now it's just like yeah i tried to tell you i literally tried to email you and and buy it for you i tried to do everything for you two weeks ago before you needed it and you laughed at me and you made it a segment on your damn podcast and now where are you you're standing in a home depot in portland uh with your empty hands

I am you know I'm living in Portland by myself because of that exact dynamic and yet now I've managed to somehow recreate it the dynamic of not listening

of not listening to advice yeah of not listening

to the smart women in my life

right yes

it's just I might be the through line Andrew

hey connective tissues hey

I did write down on the show sheet that this week I found this out from the internet this week is the 17th anniversary of the beginning of the LiveWire radio show, like the first time they ever did an episode or a performance of it. I don't know if it was even recorded. I should maybe know the origin story better, but this was long before I worked there. But I just thought it was funny and notable, Andrew, because the tweet that I saw from the official LiveWire account mentioned two of the segments that they did on the first ever episode of LiveWire. It was very sketch heavy. They had one sketch that was called lake oswego be gone oh my gosh the news from lake oswego be gone that's kind of and then they had another uh a sketch that i assume was about maybe logging or timber called wait wait don't fell me i kind of i like that they're coming i kind of would like to know what wait wait don't fell me

was so pacific northwest i love it lumber like lumber the lumber industry yeah or maybe it was

About a particular tree that was very treasured in Portland, like don't fell that tree. Wait, wait, don't fell me? Yeah, that is great. So I don't have anywhere to go with that other than I just thought you would get a kick out of those public radio parody names.

I like it.

Okay, let's take a quick break. And then when we come back, we will absolutely try to power through as many of these top stories as we can. Because as we know, Andrew is all contented out as we coast into Friday on fumes. Stay with us. And I'm such a sucker for content.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go. Everybody rattle, dazzle. Everybody rattle, dazzle.

Let's thank some dazzling donors. Everybody rattle, dazzle. These are the folks that are dazzling us with their donation of dough each month, making the show possible with a very, very generous contribution to the show, and we sure do appreciate it. We're talking about Chad Bates, who is in Bothell, Washington. Insert Bothell, Washington reference, Andrew?

Bothell, Washington. Gateway to something? For a day or a lifetime. Ah, right. Dang it. How did I not have that?

The printer just started going crazy, and it says it's receiving data. Really? What in the... Just what is going on with this thing?

Uh-oh. Now I'm just going to think it did overhear you. Yeah.

Hold on, it printed something out. I'm not even kidding. Sorry, Chad. Give me a second. I've got to get this out of the printer.

Okay, I'm going to kill the music here. What did it print? Oh, my God. A threat? Did it print out something in like that? In like... Like the cut-out letters of a ransom note?

Yeah, it says snitches get stitches. Yeah, right? Crap. Yep. No, it was actually just an old show sheet that must have been bouncing around in the printer universe whilst I didn't have the toner in there. But it would be kind of funny if in like a Twilight Zone-esque thing, remember we were talking about the Chatty Cathy doll or whatever? If the various devices just started having the printer start print, because we know they're talking to each other. if the Amazon device in the house just starts having the printer say like what's the line from Virginia Woolf that we always had hate you if you existed

I'd divorce you if you existed

like this just the Amazon device just starts just sending the meanest things to the printer

hey hold on while we've stopped the show and the music has stopped there's something related to what you were talking about that I wanted to bring up in the last segment that I forgot this is way off dazzling donor territory but in a minute you'll say maestro I'll play the music again and we'll get we'll get going again because chad's got actually a pretty serious message he wants to share but um but so last night speaking of your event last night your virtual event um you sent a photo to me we're texting about something and you sent a photo of what your setup looks like it's actually very nice i understand why you like your apartment and the view in your studio um but i'm looking at all the computers you have set up one has a script on it the one that it looks like you're streaming with I have two questions the first one less interesting it looks like the computer you're streaming with has a direct connection to KUOW was this specifically a KUOW event or is that just your background on that screen the what was going on there was just a

random moment when I snapped that photo but what you were seeing was a slideshow that airs if you were to zoom into the live wire happy hour okay you would see a slideshow and our media sponsor is K-U-O-W for this event. So you could have seen a whole bunch of other things, too. It just was in that moment it said K-U-O-W.

Okay, now, more interestingly, and I hope it's okay for me to share this. I'm not spoiling anything, but you have your computer open. You're surrounded by clocks. You've got a bell, an audio board, a couple of computers. But then you do have some scripts that are printed out on paper, and they're kind of on a script sheet facing you, kind of tilted up. And I see that the piece of paper that you have printed out is an article and the headline is cat invades market tries to steal cat food but ends up sleeping two questions on that was that related to the live event you were doing last night and second question was that the last thing you printed out before your printer died

you should be some kind of a forensic investigator um because you've really you've absolutely nailed it so that was a story that we did last so the the live wire happy hour is is a sort of a version of the show where people can buy a ticket also it was pay what you will uh last night i think that may continue to be the case so if you're bored on the third thursday night of of any month and you want to come hang out i think it's just you can kind of pay what you will but anyway uh we do a little uh the best news we heard this week and i liked that story of this cat that broke into a grocery store in england into a tesco and went to the cat food aisle and by broken i mean like snuck in like the store was open but the cat snuck in went to the cat food aisle dragged a fairly large thing of cat food off of the shelf was going to try to eat it but then fell asleep on the cat that is a great story and the photos of the cat andrew are just the best in fact i'll send you uh i'll send you a couple of them if i can find them oh good i've got them right here um and uh anyway but but so the so that was the story the best part by the way was that the um the woman who i think took the pictures of the cat she went up to the front said you know there's a cat sleeping in the cat food aisle and the grocer said yeah that cat sneaks in here always tries to always falls yeah that's apparently the cat's move again i know i go there too often but it

seems a little jughead jonesy sort of like i want a shortcut to free food but it's just an exhaust me so i'm gonna fall asleep on top of the hamburgers i don't know if that's a good parallel

um so so that was a any year and you're absolutely right that was the last thing that i printed out until this morning when i was able to fix the printer situation so all right chad sorry that we got a little distracted but uh if i uh if we could andrew could we please i'm sorry what's my name well see i feel like maestro is the thing we say before the second dazzling donor it's okay we can reuse it I'd respond to Maestro Maestro on your mark

on your mark get set get set now ready ready go everybody rattle down

we want to thank dazzling donor Chad Bates in Bothell, Washington for a day or a lifetime I was going to say that Chad says my message is very personal and I hope it can help one of the tens almost six years ago

I got a call while on vacation that my younger sister, Alicia, had been diagnosed with colon cancer. Within six months, she was gone. Since I have learned a lot about colon cancer and what we can do to help detect and treat it, the most important thing is getting a colonoscopy. Ask your doctor when it is your time. Most people start when they turn 50, but if your family has a history, it may be sooner. People have been skipping their colonoscopies During the pandemic I wonder why you would do that Andrew I wonder why anyone would ever want to use The pandemic as an excuse To not I'd be like okay I'm saying I would be guilty of the same thing Probably were I that age And I am getting ever closer to that age Andrew

I'll just say a good friend of mine Who's I think one year older than me So 45 just got his first one last week By the way So I don't know if that helps the cause or not He said everything went fine They sent him home. He was on drugs. And then we texted about the Mariners the rest of the night. And it was funny. Was it Jay Buhner? It was.

Yes. Chad continues. Most people start when they turn 50. But if your family has a history, it may be sooner. People have been skipping their colonoscopies during the pandemic. But it is still important to catch it early. There are groups like the Colon Cancer Coalition. Their website is coloncancercoalition.org, by the way. that do awareness campaigns and raise money for local groups that help patients and their families. They have events all over the country, and I encourage people to participate, donate, or just attend. In non-COVID times, they have an inflatable colon you can walk through. Don't let embarrassment kill you. Get your colon checked. That's from a dazzling donor and friend of the show, Chad. I mean, I will echo what Chad is saying. And in fact, there's even been, you know, we've had Jesse Case from Jesse versus cancer on this show before who's that was maybe the first time that I became aware of. And I don't want to I don't want to start talking about sort of medical data that I don't have a full comprehension of. But I do know that there has been a real surge in younger people having colon cancer, people that would not have expected to have colon cancer based on their age. And one of the problems is if you're younger and you're having symptoms, doctors often misdiagnose it, which is what happened to Jesse for a long time because they just are thinking you're 30. There's no way this is what you're dealing with. And, you know, catching things like that early is really the key to survivability. So to Chad's point, please, please, please take care of yourselves out there and, you know, make sure that you're staying on top of this stuff in honor of Chad's sister. Maestro. On your mark.

On your mark. Get set. Get set.

felt less special this time

because I'd already said it once.

What never gets less special are the donations of Jack Eckert of Cambridge, Massachusetts.

May I just do one thing for a second here? This is in honor of Jack Eckert, our dazzling donor. Get me, Lieutenant Eckert. That's a line from Batman 1989. Do you know what actor I was just playing there?

Ooh, okay. I'm gonna go with... Was that Jack Nicholson?

Nope. It was. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.

Hold on. Can I get a hint?

Yes, it was. You got the first name right. Hold on. Hold on. Oh, Jack Palance. Get me, Lieutenant Eckhart. Jack Palance? Is he even in that movie? It was indeed Jack Palance. It was indeed Jack Palance.

I go more with the. Go ahead. Let me try to do my Jack Palance, which I don't think I've tried in 20 years, although probably it was a week ago on the show. Ripley's. believe it or not didn't he host Ripley's believe it or not I feel like he would snort in between saying Ripley's and believe it or not Ripley's

believe it or not well there's a famous scene in 89 Batman where he does that snorting thing I forgot that that's what I first knew where he grips Jack Nicholson's shoulders before he's the Joker I believe what was his name before he's the Joker Jack I can't remember the character's name before he becomes the Joker off the top of my head. I'm nervous. I'm sweating. I'm all up. But he grabs Joaquin Phoenix, Nicole Kidman. And he says, and Jack, you, I'm a number one guy. And he says that line so weird that as a kid, having that movie memorized, I wasn't exactly sure I was ever even getting the words right. He says it so weirdly. Anyway, sorry about that. It started as a tribute to Jack and it really became a weird, weird.

weird actually you know that third one was better yeah maestro shut up that was like i didn't the second one was but then the third one that felt great um jack eckerts in cambridge massachusetts jack says i didn't know what to say until

this morning when i took a spill on some ice oh no and fractured my left arm so my shout out is to the emts and er personnel at mount auburn hospital here in cambridge everyone's been more than great and they're all my heroes today not sure i'd have made an uh made it through the last challenging year so well without the voices and jokes and jack palant's impersonations. I don't know how Jack knew to put that in the message. It's crazy to me. Without the voices and jokes of Luke and Andrew in my head each day, so many props to them as well. Oh, man, Jack, I hope that you're feeling better. Do you have any sense of when this was actually submitted by Jack? Do you think his arms healed by now?

Remember, we sent that video out that contained the link for the Dazzling Donor messages. That was connected to valentine's day right so this would have been about a month ago okay well uh jack hope that

you're uh hope you're doing okay and shout out to the folks at that hospital sorry that you had to listen to our jack palance no uh impressions before you could hear you could hear your shout

out don't apologize for that in fact um don't apologize for this either i think i've got it

cued up let's take a listen yeah okay it's an important job i need someone i can trust

you are my number one guy wow my imitation was so off in my head he takes like four snorts in my head he takes we find him saying ripley's believe it or not yeah let's try this uh because

my memory as a child is that he did about three three inhalations between ripley's like you'd be like, Ripley's, believe it or not. And he was doing one-handed push-ups the whole time, right? Because that was the other thing he did. I think when he was in like City Slickers, like I think he was in the movie City Slickers and then he was for some reason on stage, maybe it was the Oscars. I don't know if he won an Oscar or he was presenting, but he got on stage and did one-armed push-ups. Do you remember that?

No, I didn't know what you were referencing there. That's iconic. I am I think I found a full episode of Ripley's Believe It or Not from season 4 1985 but I can't find his introduction let's just try this

the unexpected these are the kinds of subjects a man named Robert L. Ripley challenged us to believe it or not in the world of art there are those whose innovations, vision and technique have set them apart from the ordinary painter or sculptor.

So in this intro, they toss it to the original Ripley to say Ripley, believe it or not.

Okay, how about this then?

Yeah, do you have it?

How about Jack Palance wins Supporting Actor 1992 Oscars?

And the Oscar for Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role.

Let me just tell you, it's Whoopi Goldberg is announcing, and the other nominees are Tommy Lee Jones, Harvey Keitel, Ben Kingsley, And Michael Lerner I'm trying to think I wonder if Tommy Lee Jones is nominated for The Fugitive Wouldn't that? Yeah that sounds about right 92, Keitel, that's gotta be some kind of Maybe Reservoir Dogs? Or maybe The Piano

The Piano or Maybe Bad Lieutenant didn't get accolades I don't know But I feel like Keitel, this is like Prime Keitel territory here, right?

Yeah, he was doing all the Tarantino films. He was doing the Jane Campion films. Ben Kingsley, boy, I don't know, 92. When did he do Gandhi? Kingsley? I feel like that was in the 80s. That was probably in the 80s. So I wonder what not. Could it have been Sexy Beast? Is Sexy Beast that old? No, I think that's 2000s. And then I don't know. Michael Lerner's face looks familiar to me, but I could not tell you what movie he was in anyway. We know Jack Palance wins. goes to

Jack Palance Citizen if you don't know

the difference between a Jabot and a Palance

I'm now going to play for the listeners the sound of him doing one armed push-ups because that's good radio by the way we are definitely getting to top stories today I'm going to just skip to the part where he basically does the push-up.

I don't know, let's look at some younger ones. We can make them look older, but this one, you know, it's kind of difficult. They forget. They forget to ask that you go out there and you do all these things. Like, for instance, you know, you go out there and you do these.

Okay, he's going to the center of the stage. He's getting down. He's doing one-armed push-ups.

Thank you.

He's kind of cheating a little bit, but we'll give it to him. He's not young. So there you go. That was the sound of the crowd applauding Jack Palance. She said Palance. Palance. Do we know? Does he say in the Ripley's Believe It or Not thing about how he – does he say his name? I found another one here. This is from 1984. Let's take this one.

Early on the morning of July 20th, 1944, a Nazi staff car sped through a forest in East Prussia. Riding in it, a German army officer carrying a bomb. He was on his way to a personal meeting with the Fuhrer himself. This is a nice light topic for keeping you on Friday. Adolf Hitler. The story of the extraordinary plot to kill Hitler at the height of World War II will be the first stop on our journey into the strange, the bizarre, the unexpected. Watch a human flamethrower at work in Mexico City.

Maestro? Are we done here? I don't know if he said we're doing this.

Hello and welcome to Top Story. Only because we have 10 pounds of top story that we're trying to stuff into a five-pound sack here. I already kind of gave away the first story, or at least gave you the broad strokes. The skateboarding Fleetwood Mac, ocean spray chugging guy who's become so well-known for that video that he put up on TikTok. His car was broken down, and he had to go to work, so he was just longboarding to work in. i believe idaho and just was videotaping himself on his phone and it went it went um viral well now that video is going to be auctioned off as an nft a non-fungible token and um it's the bidding starting at five hundred thousand dollars the thing is he doesn't have the rights to the fleetwood max song or the rights to the ocean spray so it will be the sound of it will be just him on his skateboard and the ocean spray will be blurred he can't you can't have the logo it's you know I mean doesn't have the rights well that's all you know that's all trademarked any kind of corporate logo like that is going to be trademarked and so if

he's profiting off of it but yeah that's interesting I always thought like if you're watching TV and movies if they blur out a logo I thought that that meant they didn't get the sponsorship money they wanted so they're withholding but i thought that but i guess when you're in the world of nfts like what the hell do i know about nfts and well that's the

these things well that's the thing too uh where i'm i'm realizing that like i we can play it i still don't understand well this show is not an nft yet oh my god i mean

who's gonna have the first nft podcast it's gonna happen within the month right but this is what i

don't understand for all of the nft talk that we have now done on the show so this guy um the the skateboarding guy drinking the ocean spray uh to the fleetwood mac so that video is out it exists in the world it's on tiktok it's been viewed hundreds of millions of times i could look at it on my phone right now what do i have when i have the nft version that is different than and this guy has it on his phone too he shot the original right so they're going to encrypt it In a certain way and then someone's Going to buy I bet you it goes for a million dollars By the way even without the music And the cranberry spray Or whatever it was but like what makes It I don't understand what makes It non fungible What makes it special to for Me to pay a million dollars for as opposed To is it just the file That's from his phone like the original And now it's encrypted in a way that it can never be Reproduced so I will have the only original Version and then does he not have it anymore I've got more questions than answers, Andrew.

I'll take a stab at this. I'm going to mess it up pretty brutally here, but I think maybe get it slightly closer. Or we can go back to Believe It or Not, which is still playing on my computer.

If you see him, do anything that looks like he's saying Ripley's Believe It or Not.

He keeps tossing it to Ripley to say Believe It or Not. Who's Ripley? So Ripley was a real guy, I think. Well, yeah, back in the day. Right. And so he's tossing to every time it's in the intro, he tosses to an old archive footage of Ripley saying, believe it or not. He like.

So anyway, we got to get some we got to get further down in the catalog or more current anyway.

But anyway, we have a bunch of because I've been you know, they've been talking about this on Levitard a lot because like I think is mostly a bit.

Like they're always investing in things and what, you know, and the producers has a bit of a gambling passion, let's say a passion for gambling, right. And investing and always trying to like make money quickly. This is Mike Ryan I'm talking about. And I think he kind of plays it up a bit. But anyway, they've been talking about this stuff a lot. And my understanding is, OK, you have a video on your phone of a sports highlight or or or this guy longboarding and dog face. Right. Isn't that what his handle? Yes. Like dog face. like dog face 420 yeah um and so this thing this is passed around there's nothing unique about it but then somebody creates a specific version that is you know stamped with some sort of i'm going to call it metadata here although that's not entirely correct but it's stamped with something that makes this particular version of it unique and because there's only one or three of these things in the world you can invest in in owning and usually i think you'll own a part of this thing my guess is somebody not one person will own this video but a bunch of people will invest it and they'll be given some sort of a code that they can um that they can prove like look i own a bit of this you know one in the world or three in the world video clip and it's worth a lot of money and then that person can sell their share in it again and supposedly i was doing a little reading on this the other day supposedly the good thing about it is as opposed to a painting let's say you paint something luke and i pay a hundred dollars for it right let's keep the numbers small because my brain is small you paint something i pay a hundred dollars for it and then um you blow up you be not literally you're fine but you you become very famous although i have been sort of doing that during the pandemic for some reason i don't know why but you're out standing on a canoe in the middle of a placid lake and you just blow up i don't know why uh no but like your popularity soars as a painter thus the painting that i have suddenly becomes worth a lot more right and then i i sell it i have sotheby's sell it for a thousand for five hundred thousand dollars right you don't see any of that money you sold it once and now it's mine and i sell it i think the thing about nfts is you would still make a little bit of profit if i were to resell my stake in this longboarding video and that's one of the reasons why i think it's appealing to creators did that

makes sense right because i could yeah i mean yes although in a painting you could also just structure the contract so that if you sold a painting to someone like if picasso had been smart i'm sure picasso wasn't hurting for money but like if you sell a painting you could just the terms of the sale could be you retain one percent of the of the resale value of the painting i mean that's also that could be contractually set up i don't think it is normally but i hear what you're saying which is the creator of the thing can it's probably maybe easier even and it uses blockchain technology too right so it's this series of computers that are performing these complicated tasks all the time and it's always changing it to me i just think of it as a version of why i can't ever check any of my flipping accounts ever without it also asking my phone to verify that i'm allowed to check this thing all that kind of you know dual authentication um you know multi-factor authentication my sense of blockchain is it's just that but like times times a million right so so it's like it'd be really hard to um counterfeit some of this like we're talking about digital art now or an nft would be very very hard to counterfeit because it's a it's constantly being regenerated through this blockchain technology so it's very very very like that was one of the early arguments too was you could forge the mona lisa but you cannot forge what's the name bleeple the guy who sold the thing for 60 million oh is that it i don't even remember the digital piece of digital art for 60 million but so it seems like the value or the reason that people are paying so much money for all this nft stuff is is really because they're they think that someone else will pay more money for it later and i'm curious i i do think honestly like maybe this is because i don't follow like the sort of crypto art or the digital art like this thing that sold for all that money or those i think they're called like cyberpunks which were these little these little characters that were that were kind of early like crypto block cheney things that i think where people were literally giving away but there's only so many of them and now people are paying millions of dollars for it's like a picture of a duck with sunglasses on it oh i don't know anything about that or crypto punks i think is what it's called um anyway for me i'm not in that world clearly if you hear me talking about it but the the you know dogface 420 it got so big that to me i'm not gonna spend a half a million dollars on it but like to say hey guess what i have i have the nft of that thing i mean that was one of the more iconic videos that has happened in a long time um so i could see there being some value there or at least i could see it being something that you know these whoever's going to buy it for 500 000 i mean that's the starting bid price by the way so it could go up from there it could be 60 million dollars who Mm hmm. Yeah. I mean, that's my takeaway here, that it's less about appreciate. I mean, maybe partially it's about appreciating the art or the content, but I think it's more about just like investing. And I think people are kind of losing their marbles over this. I think there's a little bit of pandemic brain that's going on.

And again, we've we've kind of stumbled around this or I'll say I've stumbled around the edges of this story as we've been kind of taking little little nips at it over the past few weeks, because I clearly don't understand it. But it's also just tied into this kind of fervor that everybody is going through, that some people are going through in trying to kind of like make money quick and invest in things. And we got a long email from a listener explaining why I can't find baseball cards anymore. And there's like a fervor over like actual physical baseball cards. And that's what NFT is trying to do. take digital things but give it the scarcity value that you can have if it's a physical object because there's only so many of those physical objects in the world right well um speaking of

the greatest video clips maybe of all time i don't think this is going to work probably as audio but why should we start now on this episode um oh did you want to play more oh i still got it going right here you don't have to play it from your end okay sorry good oh you love to hear it yeah I thought this was a – I assumed this was some kind of a deep fake last night when I saw this on Twitter, which is a clip of Sean Hannity, the Fox News personality and all-around terrible human, does not realize they have come back from break, and he is sitting there with his vape pen in his mouth and his glasses on and just doesn't know he's on TV. Have you seen this video yet, Andrew?

you know i only saw i saw a still video of it before the show today before i knew it was going to be on the show sheet and then while we've been talking i watched a nine second little

silent loop of the moment i would buy an nft of this let me just play it i don't know if it's he's just got the vape pen in his mouth and his glasses and that kind of like you know when you start to get older and you just don't see so great and you got your kind of readers on and they're like midway down your nose and he's got this he looks like a modern day Popeye as I put on Twitter with the vape pen just in kind of coming out of the side of his mouth oh so what that clip barely indicates is that somebody is off camera Odell style from the samurai sword video saying you're on you're on because he's just lost in his thoughts and this is the visual highly visual part which doesn't come through either the look on his face when he pulls the vape pen out of his mouth and i think does he take his glasses off too or is it just the vape pen let me watch the video again now look oh he does not take the glasses off but i do not remember seeing sean hannity generally wearing glasses on his show unless that's a new look for

him i think he does because i can always picture them yeah then they he often has them down at the tip of his nose oh okay well that i think so i don't watch a lot of hannity but um that's why this clip didn't that's why this clip didn't um um i i don't know like i actually and again i've only now i've heard the audio separate from the video before i was watching the video separate from the audio so i don't want to die on the cell i don't want to make a strong point here but is this really an embarrassing moment for him i actually think that he's like oops and he kind of smiles it doesn't look like he's that embarrassed about it and also i don't think people like him are ashamed of vaping you know what i mean like i still vape and i wouldn't want somebody to see me doing it because i'm just like i think it's embarrassing um but i actually like wasn't there a lawmaker like in congress like wasn't there a congressman who was like purposely like vaping in the chamber like isn't vaping almost yeah i think that was well yeah i mean

And I think that was the guy who should be in jail right now from California, whose dad was also a kind of nightmare right wing politician. Oh, how am I? Duncan Hunter. I just looked it up. Yeah, this is I think Duncan Hunter was big pro vape because I think he was getting paid. I thought I first of all, I'm with you that I don't think that. In fact, I know that Sean Hannity people know that he vapes, so I don't think it's something that he's ashamed of. I think he's ashamed of the glasses Because I'm looking Hannity's opening monologue This is from two days ago He doesn't have the glasses on I can't find any Thumbnails of him from the Fox News website Where he ever has his glasses on

Oh my gosh, but just do a quick Google image search of Sean Hannity glasses You see him on stage reading Or I guess maybe there he's just maybe reading off his phone Try to find a picture of him on television Hosting his show wearing glasses Okay, here I'll send this one to you Because here's an article Well, does Sean Hannity not like appearing on air with his glasses? So here's one of them. What are they saying about that? This is a weird website. This is Mixdex.com. I have no idea what this is. This is not. I mean, I am getting. I am getting.

computer herpes so bad right now probably the website um noted that during a hannity segment hannity would put on what appeared to be reading glasses to read from papers in front of him in the studio shortly after he puts the glasses on hannity disappeared from the screen even though he was still talking so yeah maybe he is embarrassed about the glasses you're right i felt i i think

you're 100 right that he's not the vaping isn't seen as like he got caught doing something like it's not pot i think he's a smoker and he wants to smoke in the studio and that's what he does i think and and i remember yesterday or last night in reading about this someone had mentioned that he'd even like barstool sports which boy birds of a feather really hang together barstool sports had been like writing something up about his vaping or made him they're like vapor of the week or something and he was talking about how his son thought it was cool like i'm not these are all real things that i read last night andrew i shit you not so who is the bar who is the bar barstool sports vapor of the week of course like sean hannity was talking about how his son thought it was so cool oh my god sean hannity's son thought it was so cool that his dad was on barstool sports and it was something about vaping but i have this theory and again i don't watch hannity either so i could be very wrong very wrong but i had this theory he him with the him with the reading glasses on in the vape pen that he doesn't want people to see him wearing reading glasses because he doesn't like the look of it he thinks it makes him look i mean i don't think he's trying to literally lie to the american people and like whatever that thing you just read from yeah

called no i mean this is really i mean it yeah meowmix.com whatever it was um but i think you're right and that's the other photo i see is him it's like more of a candid moment and so i don't know why i felt like seeing him with glasses made sense to me but if the one of the only images i can find is an article about you know whether or not he's embarrassed of it that is definitely to your point maybe i'm surprised because i think he looks better with them like they're good glasses

actually totally and it makes you seem scholarly which lord knows yeah he could use some of it

breaks up i don't know he's kind of got a big face and i say that as a man with a big face i'm talking just strictly like look and who looks great in glasses yeah thank you i like i think they're a good like he should wear them i think they look better yeah i mean i've obviously i'm coming to

this with a massive amount of baggage right about fox news and and feeling like if it's true that sean hannity doesn't want to be seen with his glasses i mean look i'm i'm a guy who was earlier in the show proposing using printer toner to cover my bald spot so i'm not going to really be i'm not going to win any contests about who's less vain or worried about how their appearance looks but to me i can't help but tie it up into some other kind of just like anti-intellectualism or something which i don't even have confirmation on that that's what's going on with him but there was just last night just seeing and i again i also am a non-vapor so and i say this with absolute peace and love to the people out there that vape i think it looks ridiculous um also they would say you know what looks ridiculous luke you sitting at a roulette wheel fair point um but uh so he seeing him vaping and with his glasses on that I kind of took to be like a thing he wasn't really wanting everyone to see it just delighted me so the weird

thing is is and I I'm the one who vapes in the in the is that a show title no because it's another podcast there is a that's why I said it and my brother my brother and me they used to do a bit which I don't know if I ever heard it but I heard Genevieve talk about it a lot they have a segment called which one vapes and they talk about stars and I don't know exactly how it all plays out but it sounds pretty funny and they they're also the ones who call um vaping pulling cotton apparently which i think is a pretty good thing so anyway i want to avoid i want to avoid stealing their bits but um what i was going to say is so i'm the one who actually is in that world and with a lot of shame right like again you wouldn't really see me usually in public just like kind of like walking down the street pulling cotton as the boys would say um but um but i will say in this quick image because i saw the headline on boing boing right um that's boing boing still exist yeah i follow him on twitter and so i saw i saw this on boing boing and i was like oh but then i looked at the image i'm like oh he actually kind of looks like as far as vaping goes he's got more of a cool vape than most things he doesn't have a huge battery and he's not as you say doesn't look like he's a dragon driving a car with a huge he actually looks he's actually pulling off the glasses and the vape pen more coolly than and again i hate sean hannity i want to be clear about that but i'm also just like in this nine second video i'm watching him kind of casually vaping like that is a much cooler look than most vapors that i see god i hate this sentence

i don't understand the again i i want to say that i don't want to sound like i'm being insulting towards our listeners who happen to vape because i have a million terrible habits and and and maybe Vabium's not even...

a bad habit i don't know i don't know the science but i don't know the difference if i was going to be someone who did vape i would use the thing that like hannity's using or like other friends of ours who will remain nameless uh use that just like little stick that's almost like a um you know

like a it's not even a cigarette right like it's right yeah but but there's sometimes they kind of

have a kind of a cool almost trapezoidal shape to them now like a little you know what i'm talking about yeah like if i was going to be a person who vaped that would be 100 what i would use which kind of looks ish like the one he's using because i i don't understand is it just the one with the battery is it that you can get more um oil in there is that why people have that like deck of playing cards with like a freaking flute coming off of it what's the point of that because i don't understand why anyone would do that one if they have the option of the little more slender one

like what sean hannity is using i would like to say up front here like i really don't know that i have a good answer to that i think i have an answer to that but people can correct me but i feel like there is a um there is a kind of split in the let's say the vaping community or there are various vaping communities and the fabric of right vaping universe and you have some and this is the more dangerous one that are like kind of the what is the product is it it's not blue is it what is everybody always talks about the oh jewel yeah where's my jewel you know And this is more like the younger kids who are kind of getting into it, which is bad. That's like the bad way to go as opposed to I've been a lifelong smoker and I'm trying to get rid of cigarettes. So this is my stepping down mechanism. But you kind of have that like everybody. And maybe that's even the one you're talking about, like the Juul thing that is like smaller and more compact. And and then you have like the more gear heads who are really into the world of vaping for a while there for reasons I don't understand. I think I was just learning how to make gifts out of videos. And so I made a series of GIFs of people like talking about their vape batteries and just like blowing huge clouds of smoke on the Internet. A lot of them are white guys with beards. I don't know if you're going to be surprised to hear that or not. But but yeah, like we you and I used to work with a guy who remained nameless. But he was like what I thought of as he was one of the first guys I know who vaped. And he was like your stereotypical like gearhead vapor. and this is a guy who you'll know who this is he was the IT guy the ineffectual oh grumpy IT guy at a radio station where we both worked for a while and he sat in his office in the basement and vaped and he would come upstairs and vape and this is when vaping was new so there weren't a lot of rules around it like there's no smoking in the building but he'd come up and fix my computer and then kind of like he really got a kick out of the fact that he would just vape in the building I'm sure he does not do that anymore but he was like he was always trying to get me into vaping and he was like telling me about the batteries and it just kind of like it'd be you know for them it's like it's not just i need a little kick here it's like a whole hobby and a whole community right like taking things apart and putting them back together anyway somebody probably has a much more um realistic and accurate uh description of of this than i do well um i think you're absolutely right

that and we're in no way doing an ad for jewel here because i think it's probably a fairly pernicious force in our society but i think that's what he was using or something like it and i will say this little thing that one looks less dumb to me than the alternative right right right but kids it's a little bit more it's yeah please don't honestly do not um uh but if you are gonna vape out do it while watching the ntc 17 unreleased version of mrs doubtfire which i don't really know if this exists there was a twitter feed called like film facts today that said basically because Robin Williams' improvisation was so all over the map in the filming of Mrs. Doubtfire that there were actually, there's a PG version, there's a PG-13 version, there's a rated R version, and there's an NC-17 version. That was why the movie was trending. I would be pretty surprised if it was even true. Does that sound like something that could even be possible to you?

I find it hard to believe that they would have made, That they would have put in the labor to make all these various directors cut to not make any money off of it. I don't understand. I mean, maybe people behind the scenes thought certain, you know, improv bits were good that hit the cutting room floor. So maybe they personally made these things. And that's what I haven't read this article. So my apology. It's a tweet. I just repeated it. It's just a tweet. You're as up to speed as anyone is. So I find it hard to believe, though, that there are. I mean, it's funny that we're having this story. This is another thing that I know nothing about. But, like, isn't this weekend the weekend that the director's cut of Superman versus Batman or something is coming out that everybody is talking about? Do you know what I'm talking about? Oh, yeah. Well, that's, you know what, Andrew? What's his name? No, no. Ryan. Zack Snyder. Snyder. Yeah. Zack Snyder.

Speaking of Zacks.

Were we? I don't know.

Inside to the power of inside. It's TV Tell, ladies and gentlemen. Well, that's another thing about this is I did a tweet that I don't really stand behind. I did a tweet. It's not authentic to me. By the way, I couldn't believe how much you roasted me the other day when we were talking to Andrea Seabrook, and you said sometimes my Twitter stories, there's no there there.

I was just trying to make her laugh, and I'm sorry that was at your expense. Wow, okay. Zack Snyder's Justice League. I just need to get that out there because I couldn't have – some director re-released Batman vs. Robin and his name is Ryan is just going to make – I already feel like that made several heads explode in our audience. My apologies.

Well, I'm doing something that's arguably worse, which is I don't watch any of that superhero stuff generally other than WandaVision. And so I don't know anything about Justice League. What I do know is that there has been for the last however many weeks you mentioned it, this thing of like the Snyder Cut. So through context, I'm aware that that's like a version of a movie that people are calling for Or, you know what I mean, an edit of a movie And so when I saw the Mrs. Doubtfire thing I thought it would be funny to retweet it and say, release the Snyder Cut But I don't stand behind that tweet because I don't even know what the Snyder Cut really is It's not something that's authentic to me I just know that it's, it made sense It's like how I get a lot of Jeopardy questions right just through context But I don't really know the thing I just know, well, if it's a question about literature from this era and it involves the ocean, it's probably Moby Dick. But it's not because I remember that fact from Moby Dick. It's because I'm putting it to – so this was like – this just felt like astroturfing to me as a tweet goes because I don't have a real experience with it. I just know that people are saying it and so then I said it. I don't really stand behind it.

So did you get rid of it? No, I'm going to see how it engages. Yeah, obviously if you get the – I've got to give it a test run, kick the tires, bro. Where are you now on that? That's what we need to figure out. Is this tweet an NFT, by the way? He got 34 likes. I mean, you know, that's fine.

How long are you? I would sell my soul for 500 likes. 34 likes is not enough for me to put up in what feels like an inauthentic tweet. I'll be deleting it later. Have you seen this documentary? This film is not yet rated. It's pretty old, actually. I think it's like 14 years old, but it's really good. And on the subject of if there could be an NC-17 version of Mrs. Doubtfire, I would highly recommend folks see this documentary because what it does is it really gets into, like, what the hell is the rating system for movies?

What's the name of the documentary? Sorry, I was this film is not yet rated. Oh, that rings a bell, but I don't think I've seen it now, but I think I've seen trailers for it.

It is so fascinating because when you're a kid and a movie is rated R or a movie is rated, you know, PG or whatever it might be, G. I think as a kid you kind of think Well I guess the president decided that Or Congress Did the policemen decide that this is an R movie No It's the Motion Picture Association of America It's not a legal thing

That was the one thing that I did know That they did it as I think an end around So that they didn't get So that laws weren't passed Weren't there rumblings to actually make it legislation So they're like no no no We'll police ourselves

I haven't seen this documentary in a long time But that's my memory of it So yeah, they were trying to get out in front of actual government intervention But it's just It's a very, very, very Byzantine world Of why certain films And if I remember right I think the sort of meta statement of this film Is that they're trying to get it rated And it ends up being rated NC-17 The documentary about the rating system Oh, really? Yeah, it gets really Like in a great way It gets really weird with this documentary Because the MPAA doesn't really want them to put the documentary out because it's kind of pulling the lid off of their thing. So the MPAA is trying to give it a terrible rating so that it can't actually show in theaters. Oh, my God. Which is pretty meta, right? Yeah, pretty meta and also just diabolical. Well, that's what you kind of take away from the film. And, you know, this is the perspective of, I think the guy's name, like, Kirby Dick, the filmmaker. But that's the perspective that he has. And I don't have a reason to disbelieve him. But, yeah, you basically have the MPAA did not really want this movie exposing their systems to get out. And so they tried to make it so that it – and then I also, if I remember right, there's not even an official rule about, like, theaters and what they can play, right? Like, movie theaters are – this is a private business where you have a room and seats and popcorn. Like, you can – like, again, you can show something that you – like, there's just so much about it that's much more, like, just – what's the word I'm looking for? It's sort of It's more about like just what's considered To be appropriate or mores Or like you know following these unspoken rules Then like The police aren't going to show up If you try to show an NC-17 movie At your movie theater or whatever Or if you let a kid go to an NC

I guess you could get an obscenity charge, maybe, but it's like so much of this is just like held together through people agreeing to abide by these rules, which have really like no actual power. So all that to say, I don't think there's an NC-17 version of Mrs. Doubtfire either. Also, because I just don't see Robin Williams saying I don't feel like that was his go to even his stand up comedy specials. I mean, honestly, they were probably more just homophobic and racist. I mean, I'm not trying to say that Robin Williams was in his heart a homophobe or a racist, but I think if you watch old Robin Williams specials, there was a lot of times where he went to places and did characters that I don't think we would think was acceptable now from a white man.

You know, I haven't seen Good Morning Vietnam probably since I assume I watched that in college. But I mean, I and I swear like I was not somebody who thought about social issues. But I swear when I think back of certain things that I experienced or watched in my life early on before I thought about things the way I think about them now, you know, like in the in the context of of racial justice or human rights or whatever. there are things i look back and i'm like that always felt wrong to me and robin williams doing black voice in um good morning vietnam i just feel like i always knew there was that was uncomfortable i wish i would have even had that thought i just didn't i could be wrong i could be

wrong like i didn't let to me it was just never that funny yeah but it wasn't because i sensed that like hey this is probably not the this is not the greatest way for you as a white guy to be you know entertaining people and by the way i'm sure that many many many of our listeners when not vaping are huge robin williams fans so you know i'm not trying to harsh your mellow today but yeah i just to me i wish that i would have at least had the forethought to think you know what this is an offensive way to to to appropriate or pretend to appropriate what you think of as being someone's way of speaking or culture but my brain wasn't even that complicated i was just like

this isn't really funny to me well let me be very clear here because i don't want to be like patting myself like i was a very un i feel like uneducated is the wrong way but like i i did not think about these things in any kind of smart way when i was young i don't want to give myself too much credit there i think it was just more of a vague notion like when people describe having a migraine coming on and it's just sort of like a weird what do they always call the thing that's like in the pre-migraine where it's just like something is off and you know it's coming like that is more like probably how i quote unquote thought about it you know what i mean i didn't probably have those thoughts it just everything there's something and again i'm like you though i also found it just deeply deeply unfunny and exhausting that whole that version of robin

williams i think i liked him in aladdin like because maybe there was some added thing to them being able to animate but one thing was they they only picked the riffs that worked or worked better so that was good because like robin williams we we've had this conversation a million times and rovin williams is no longer alive and i think was a very sweet man actually like when i remember hearing him on wtf uh and he seemed like a really yeah a really kind person so i don't want to drag the guy down but um with a lot of struggles that i did not know about until

he died by the way which of course uncovered that as well so like that's another thing too i don't want to be speaking ill of the dead of somebody i had no idea when he was alive until he died and And I went back to listen to that Marc Maron interview. Did I realize how much he struggled with mental health? So that's definitely worth noting.

Yeah, so maybe we'll just call it good on that. And let you know, Andrew, that cattle rustling is a real thing. It's alive and well in 2021. I'm not going to delay the show or extend the show or do a poor person's version of Anna King's nice stories that Anna King has been doing on public radio. But just Google cattle rustling. There's sort of two things going on. One, this is a story I heard on OPB this morning about how basically people are still stealing cows, physically stealing cows because cows are very valuable, you know, and also they're basically friendly or easily, you know, herded into a truck. I didn't know this until I heard Anna's piece. You can actually change the branding on a cow. So if you brand a cow with your ranches, whatever, so you could just design your ranches brand to be something that uses that but then adds a curly Q to it or something. And so now you've obscured that history of the cow You can take their ear tags out Cows are pretty stealable Because they're in the middle of nowhere And they're not super Bright, if you will Which is, in my mind, not a reason necessarily To kill them and eat them So cow wrestling is a real thing It's really happening I don't want to do it You're not going to do it?

No, that's not what we're doing for the TBTelethon this year

What about TBTelethon14 Legend of Andy's Gold, where we go to a dude ranch, Jack Palazzo.

Palance style. Wait, Billy Crystal and Daniel Stern style and a Jack Palance-esque. Wait, who's the short guy, though?

Who's the third guy in City Slickers? I'm looking at...

Oh, is it Joe Pesci, Bruno Kirby? Kirby. Probably Bruno Kirby. Yep. And maybe that's what we do. We go to a dude ranch, and we lose our City Slickers way, and we find the legend of Curly's Gold. One thing. One thing. And that's why you're no longer A city Slicker Alright let's do some music For your weekend Before we hit that dusty trail I say that a lot and this is the one time where it's actually Appropriate because of what we've been talking about What song would you like to play for the listeners On this Friday Andrew? I'm struggling here Luke

Just generally speaking There's a song that I love And I know you're going to love so much, but it literally has MF-er in the title, and it's literally the fourth word in the song, and then it just moves on. I'll tell you what, I won't play this, but Luke, I want you and listeners who kind of like the kind of stripped-down indie rock that you and I tend to go for, kind of poppy indie rock. There is a band called The Peacers, The Peacers, like one who peaces out, I guess. Right. And the song is Ghost of a MF-er.

Like what you like to do on Saturday night as me and Camaro and Genevieve are about to shift into our third location.

I will be a peacer, as in I am peacing out. So if anybody's interested in that, I won't because that's a pretty – and it just comes so early in the song and it just like so – it rings out. So I'm not going to play that, but it's a really good song and you're going to like it. so okay what's it i'm looking at their website it's called the ghost of an mfer and i believe they've released maybe two songs on an upcoming album and that's one of them and that one is really good so listen to that uh on your own time um for now okay i'm gonna play something that is in on safer ground um let's see here this is by a musician by a band i guess sasha and the valentines and i would like to give a hat tip i only know about this song because it was put on a playlist by our friend Celine Ramadan aka Prom Queen and she's been making some really fun Spotify mixes I don't know if fun is the right word but very good Spotify mixes and this is a song called Witches and this is a pretty new song Witches by Sasha and the Valentines I don't think there are any swears in it

We'll be right back. We'll be right back. There you go.

Sasha and the Valentine's Witches.

I like that a lot. It's got a little beach house vibration going on in there. Is that Chill Wave? I don't know what Chill Wave is. We've done more shows trying to figure out what Chill Wave is. I know. Any other podcast hosted by two people of our age. I know. I would say. um well my my song is from a band that the listeners might be surprised that i've picked this song because of how much i've been sort of dragging astrology um on the show over the course of the last few weeks and and and having a bit of fun uh at the expense of people who put a lot of kind of thought into their signs i've been trying to pitch dan harman's um new version of astrology, Z+, and yet the song I want to suggest is from a French band called Oracle Sisters, and I believe the title is, well, the title is ASC period Scorpio, but I believe it's Ascending Scorpio.

That'd be my guess.

This whole song, I think, is just about astrology, but it's so good.

good, Andrew, that I don't care, which is me being such a Taurus right now. So that's my suggestion. Can we play the song by Oracle Sisters, Ascending Scorpio?

Yes, we can. Are you ready to go on this? I'm ready, man. Okay, buckle up, everybody. Here it is. By the way, you can tell when I'm stalling when I was on the wrong page of Spotify, but I'm ready now.

We'll be right back. We'll be right back.

what do you think oh i love it this is vibing right yeah amazing i know it's so good they have

just like a ton of singles out and then they have like one ep um that at least i was able to find on the internet and on spotify but yeah they appear to be from france i was also during that song i was letting it go a little long because a it's so good and b i really want it's killing me that i somehow lost that tape of our friend off of tiktok the cinnamon toast enthusiast who also was thought it was shocking that her and her brother both had those certain signs oh right right right right yeah i know and i was like i was trying to use every single like search term that I could to figure out like how it would like I was like coincidence, rising signs. Well, the funny thing is

for a second, I now realize we have a both a cinnamon bread thing that we use and also a banana bread thing that we use because when you first said that I have that. Banana bread at work today, dude? Hell yeah. There you go. Banana bread at work today. Hell yeah.

Or what about, oh man, I've actually found the tape and now it's whatever i'll stop i'm sorry i i gotta my towel rod just got here luke i gotta go okay no that's fair how about um this book and my brother's big three are cancer

sun cancer moon sagittarius rising like is that why is why are we both like double sign

sagittarius rising totally worth it thank you yes that was good stuff all right our listener suggestion comes from listener eric hey guys my suggestion comes from alex moss who's the lead singer of the great psychedelic rock band the black angels who put out his first solo album recently it is titled luca after his newborn son and this song is titled 500 dreams uh it's uh one of the songs on the album written for his son that gives me all of the feels peace and love eric in seattle p.s tell andrew he never has to apologize for playing parquet courts on the show they are great and one of my favorite bands to see live we have a real uh technical issue here

because for some reason i feel like wait where's that playing from oh okay over here i thought i still had banana bread guy going in the background but i couldn't find oh yeah oh yeah i've got it here though i'm sorry boy i really let this show slip away at the end here but i'm excited about my towel rod i'm going into the weekend with a new towel rod like come on sure who can blame me

right no let's let's get that weekend started right now this is um a listener eric's suggestion it's alex moss it's going to bring us to the end of our broadcast week so thank you so much everyone for listening thanks for being part of tbtl have a great weekend we'll see you on monday until then Stay safe, and please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

When you grow up, I'll be thinking about you, thinking about me. So sleep for your mama and me. A city comes and makes you feel so small.

The tide rolls in, covers you head and all.

Blue skies break and show the darkest day And sometimes love seems so damn far away

Remember when you're stuck Did you always have a home? Home is where you keep the things you love to hold the most

Home is where I am Thinking about you and thinking about me

So sleep for your mama and me For your mama and me

Power out!

You