Muse

When you eat pasta, you are essentially sending a hormonal message to your body saying pack on more fat. That's what's happening. So even without cakes and chocolate, pasta itself turned into sugars in your body. That's what makes you gain all the weight. That's it. We're throwing our pasta out, Peter. All pastas, lasagna, all of it. We're done. All this stuff.

You even did it. Oh, no, no, no, no. It just happened so we can look at it. No, we're cutting it out of our diet. We are done with pasta. We are done with spaghetti. We are done with linguine, fettuccine. Fettuccine doesn't count. It absolutely counts.

No more pasta. Just have a bowl of spaghetti. Come on.

No.

What happened to you?

What happened? No more pasta for you or me. Okay? It's over. We're done.

Okay.

TBTL.

He is a fan of the outrageous. He loves to surprise. He loves other things as well.

Oh, this is the best pizza in a cup ever. This guy is unbelievable. He ran the old cup of pizza guy out of business. Game day, bucket, go, boom. But it's not on TV. That's just an internet thing, okay?

All right, hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Thursday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Explaining how a show works means the show's already in trouble. My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host. Oh, yeah. Coming to you from the Nest Broadcast Center, high in the sky above Portland, Oregon, where as I sit here, it is a rainy, gloomy day. Didn't know you like to get wet, though. But as you're hearing this, this is being broadcast all over the world. on thursday i'm somewhere in the absolute middle of nowhere in the like california desert california got sunshine someplace called cerro gordo finding out what it's like to live by yourself in a uh an abandoned town during a pandemic which is what one guy has been doing down there um this is episode 3,387 in a collector series let the fun begin I hope whenever I'm putting together kind of multiple show sheets on the same day even though it seems like a very simple arithmetic challenge to just add one number each day and even though we do get regular emails reminding us what show number we're on I always seem to mess it up when we try to do two shows in one day but i think we're at three three eight seven i know this i know it's going to be an amazing show why because longtime friend of the program and friend of me mr dan pashman from the sporkful is going to join us to talk about his pursuit of the perfect pasta hey where's

a freaking gabagoo.

Of course, we know that Dan is all about forkability and sauceability, and he likes to eat things at their absolute maximum expression of what they're all about. It's something he's been talking about for years on The Sporkful, which he says is for it's not for foodies, it's for eaters, and he realized there was a problem with all of the different pasta shapes. None of them were ideal, and so he set out to invent his own, and he did, and now It's something you can actually buy, which is crazy. It makes me deeply jealous that we don't have any special TBTL inventions to sell. But more on that coming up when we talk to Dan. And, of course, because it's a Thursday, we will also do a Blur's Day message or two or five or however many we have. That's the plan. It can't happen without the help of this guy, the longest-drying Cobra of the show, known for his drawings of the tall ships. Speaking of food, he has been working on his goulash recipe. I'll leave out the foot meat myself. He's Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. Good morning, my friend.

Good morning. We have to remember to ask Pashman. I'm just thinking of this now. We have to remember to ask him about Thousand Island and its place in the condiment world. Like, okay. Because you know he's got thoughts. You know he's got thoughts. Now, the question, of course, has been simplified to, is Thousand Island a condiment? And I at first was arguing, no, it's not. But I guess by the letter of the law, it is because all dressings are condiments, but not all condiments are dressing. Okay, fine. But I think the real question we have to ask him is, is it misleading to refer to...

To refer to Thousand Island as a condiment in a trivia question when Thousand Island is the answer, right? I know that's very specific, but I think that's what's at the heart of this argument here.

You're afraid to—I don't want to say afraid. Yeah, I'm not afraid of anything except for heights. I'm not scared of nothing.

Spiders and snakes and sometimes you're in anger. Being outside and being inside.

At restaurants you haven't been to before. yeah heights yeah in betweens yeah no I you're not afraid but I think what you what I'm getting from you is that if the question is presented to Dan is Thousand Island a condiment the answer will quickly be yes so that's not really the best way to ask the question the best way to ask the question is if you were writing a trivia game and you were going to describe and the answer was going to be Thousand Island would you call it a dressing or a condiment in the clue right or is

it misleading to call it but anyway we'll lay it all out for him in fact we won't even have time once we lay this all out we won't even have time to talk about his pasta

he's getting enough attention over that anyway

he's getting a lot of attention I mean I'm happy to give him more

holy media blitzes like it's incredible you can't

you know blintzes is a blintz a kind of food

yes a cheese blintz something you've never had yes and never Will a real media Blintz can we call is that the show Yes yes Dan Pashman's media Blintz Yeah I mean he was On morning edition he was On the splendid table Today I think

He was on network TV wasn't

Yeah I mean he's just been everywhere This is like the only thing this week that's rivaling Shrimp dad Is Dan Pashman's Cascatelli pasta Situation and if he and Jensen Karp can combine forces And do some kind of a podcast about people who Find pasta in their Breakfast cereal they'd really I mean at that point officially dominate the media

Landscape that's right Dan could be selling Oh this is interesting this is Interesting we finally found something Well it's not interesting radio it's interesting in my life Theo who so we're you mentioned that We're recording this on Wednesday so we've Already done one episode of TBTL In which Theo did his normal thing which is he slept behind me on his little office chair um it's so funny man in the morning he just like he keeps running up to me and then running back to the office in his chair like he's like when are we going to work it's time to get to work and so he slept on his chair all during the first

have you considered getting him his own kind of like small lunchbox the size lunchbox that he can bring to work or how about a briefcase so it kind of looks like he looks like that something about

the soul of a cat you can tell when somebody's petting a cat even if you can't see him because They start talking like this, don't we?

They do, and they also start making evil plans.

Yes, exactly.

There's one thing we know. It's that, like, petting a cat, when you're multitasking, and one of those tasks is petting a cat, you're probably inside of a carved-out fortress in an island that looks like a human skull. Yep. And you're about to take out either Inspector Gadget or Austin Powers.

But now that we're recording this later in the day, this is the time that Theo starts waking up, and he starts to get fidgety and hungry and he starts yelling at me. And he was just doing that a little bit in the introduction. Hopefully the music covered most of it. But this is his new thing. If I'm not giving him the attention he wants, he has figured out that old squeaky bones, though he's made of, he can sort of leap from his office chair up onto my desk now. Wow. And it's clumsy and it's ugly, but he gets there and now he's standing right in front of me. I thought he was going to ring my bell. Not in the room. Can you take a picture of this? Yeah, I'm trying to do that right now. He's just standing right in front of my computer. He's like, all right, fine. I can't stand on your lap. Then I'm just going to stand on your desk and rub my face into your hand.

He leapt from a chair to your table that you work from. That's pretty spry for an old guy. That was the Offspring's second idea for that song. I'm glad they went with Pretty Fly for a White Guy. Actually, I'm not. That's a terrible name for a song.

Oh, man. Anyway, yeah. So he's up here now, and he's going to step up. Do you need to take a minute? Do you need – No, I'm just trying to get a good photo of it. But let's see. What else do we want to talk about?

I mean, is he going to go walk on the computer there and start just activating all manner of random sound effects?

Both of my computers are now up on – here's a good photo. There it is. I got it. Perfect. Both of my computers are now up on these high-rises, these computer stands. My booyada arrived. Wait, did you go out? Did you break the bank? I broke the spent 35 hard-earned dollars on the second computer stand. So what's it called again? Booyata, Booyata, B-O-Y-A-T-A. Hey, one last thing. Let's move off of my office furniture and cat now for a second. I realized I made a mistake, a kind of tactical error in today's intro montage. of the tape so so much of it was perfect um not that part where you just threw something away was that the sound of you throwing no that's that would be no it was the sound of me including something like this just like get another one of these booyah does yeah there you go um but uh today's intro tape happened to be about pasta i actually picked this a few days ago before we even knew dan was going to be on the show that was an amazing coincidence but i did make one coincidence andrew or godwincidence i feel like that i feel like if you wanted to make the device i feel like you could make that something that gets you on like cable television pitching a book

called godwincidence i know it's a oh yeah definitely that could now forget being unreasonable and unreasonable yes that's my new motivational speech yes turning your coincidences into godwincidences

That's so great. What do you think? Did you happen to notice a mistake? And I'll say this. It wasn't a mistake in today's intro so much as a mistake when you consider what I played in yesterday's intro, too. Oh, my gosh. Okay. Yesterday was Dr. Steve Brule, right? Yes, that was the dry. But unfortunately, here, I'll just tell you, you'll never get there. The first tape in the montage, both yesterday and today, was Steve Carell from The Office. I didn't realize I was doing that. Same clip or just the same character? Same character. Different clips. Oh. But that's embarrassing. I mean. Everybody else noticed.

Well, you know why I didn't notice, Andrew? I have to tell you something. Uh-oh. I, because we are recording a couple of shows on the same day, and I got to keep my energy high. I got to keep that patented Luke Burbank energy, you know, going strong for now multiple hours of recording. I realized as the intro music was playing that I wanted to get another cup of coffee. And so I ran into the kitchen while the today's intro was playing the Portlandia pasta. OK, yeah. But the thing is, the coffee machine has turned itself off. So what I had was a cold pot of coffee. So I poured the coffee into the cup, and then I put it in the microwave and set it on Beveregino. Microwave. And then ran back in, put my headphones on to hear where things were at. We were at the end of Portlandia talking about pasta, where Fred Armisen is going. For like 20 seconds, which I find so funny for some reason. And then I was like, okay, I'm going to run back into the kitchen. I'm going to – whatever point the beverage setting on the microwave is at, it's just going to have to be good enough. I'm going to pull the coffee out. I'm going to run back in and put my headphones on. I did all of that, and when I got back, the music was playing. There was no more talking. How long did the music play before I started talking after the last of the audio drive?

It did not seem longer than usual. I'd go back to the tape and play it for you But I can't because we're still using the tape we're making This is one of those things where as long as we're recording it

You can't fix the wing on the airplane while we're flying Right, right, right

It's a different setup, I feel like I could There are some radio stations where you have that setup Where you can be playing stuff that you literally said five minutes earlier That's not this kind of radio station though, Luke

But I'm glad to hear that it wasn't noticeable Because when I came back and I put the headphones on And then the music is just playing I had no idea if it had been playing for 40 seconds or four minutes or what. So I'm glad to hear that it was relatively seamless. Of course, I then completely undid that by explaining to people what I had been doing the whole time.

Well, people were really obsessed with hearing the Steve Carell two days in a row. So I think that people's heads were there. They weren't even thinking about it.

Right, but I wanted you to know that's why I couldn't go there with you. In fact, that's why I had a hard time. I would have In a million years I would have never Been able to guess What the problem was Because I didn't hear

Because you didn't even hear it Which that kind of Bumps me out Because I work hard on those And then you don't Well I'll listen to it Later tonight

When I do my devotionals And I listen to TBTL And I take my notes So I will hear it

When you're doing Your Godwincidences Studies

Oh man Get me a headset microphone And a Kind of Trying to think of what my outfit would be for my God Winston's probably a black

Turtleneck oh really I was thinking Like kind of I was so you know what I was picturing Sort of you'd Be dressing like the guy in the Progressive Commercials who's teaching people not to be Their parents I was picturing like blue shirt Tucked into khaki pants with pleats

But I think that guy has I believe He has a black turtleneck on under

His blazer oh does he oh he's got A blazer black turtleneck okay well I was picturing you a little bit more Microsofty, a little bit blue oxford shirt tucked into very pleated pants maybe it's that i start off i'm i'm into this black turtleneck thing maybe it's the black turtleneck under the blazer and then as i get into my presentation i slowly remove the blazer because i'm getting really serious and kind of roll up the sleeves on my on my turtleneck uh when it's time to let the audience know that we're really getting into the kind of nitty-gritty what if you just keep removing one article of clothing throughout and never explain it and then what do i get down to just like i mean am i

completely nude by the end of it or am i wearing that's absurd g-string pasties

i i'm trying to think if that would if that would actually like improve sales of the dvd or actually hurt sales well it depends on the g-string and the pasties you gotta pick the right ones yeah well if you want to send over some mock-ups some ideas i'll take a look at those

and um they're sitting right here on my desktop so i'm sending them right now actually i did send you a picture of uh theo by the way on my on my literal desktop not my computer look i mean i have

to tell you that like it makes me feel really happy to know that theo can do that i know well considering kind of you know the health scares of of the last year with him and and the fact that He's still got that much energy and sort of physical ability. I think that's very cool. Even if it does ultimately make this show worse, I like to know that Theo can do it.

Although I did get a note from somebody who said, I like it when you talk about your cat, and I like hearing him in the background, so stop apologizing for it.

But I was listening to The Stern Show this morning a little bit, Andrew, and they were doing a bit with somebody from the Wack Pack. And it was a stock picking contest between Sal, the stockbroker, who's one of their staffers, and one of the WACPAC members, Wendy. And she – there was a cat just meowing incessantly exactly like Theo throughout the broadcast. And it didn't bother me at all. So, like, that's another thing that you share with the Howard Stern WACPAC.

We are exactly like the Howard Stern Show in numbers and content. I just wanted to say really quickly – and this is corny and I say a version of this like once a week now. Uh, so apologies in advance for being a cornball, but everything you just said about Theo, you know, we really thought we were losing him around Thanksgiving time and, you know, we were so lucky that we were able to bring him back home, but we brought him back home after his health scare with really the idea that we don't have much more time with him, but at least we have some more time with him. And he didn't just like we didn't lose him in the throes of an emergency during a pandemic and we didn't get to say a proper goodbye. So we're like, OK, well, we have no idea how much more time we have with him, but we'll at least get to spend some time with him. And now, like he's he just got back yesterday from his like third or fourth vet appointment since then. He seems to be doing well. He's, you know, his usual rambunctious self. I mean, he's showing his age a little bit, but there was a moment when we brought him home from his incident, and I said to Genevieve, and I had this thought a lot around that time, it really bums me out knowing that Theo won't be around to hang out with us on our roof deck this summer when we're playing cards again, which is our, you know, kind of our summer weeknight tradition. We go out, we play cards. Theo wanders around the deck, whines at us, eventually goes back inside. And I was like, this is kind of a bummer. We know that he won't be around. And now here it is, like March. And, you know, again, knock on wood, he's an old cat. But, like, he seems to be doing really well. And, like, he will be out there annoying us when we're trying to play cards. I mean, that's when you really know that he's back in good shape. He's annoying you again.

Yeah, that's great, man. I'm really happy for you guys. And, I mean, I remember I think I was over at your place maybe a week or so after. Yeah. He had gone to the doctor, and he was kind of – he was just – he looked – he definitely seemed a little shell-shocked. Like he seemed physically like he was sort of okay, but he would kind of just come and stare into the middle distance. And I think you – I just remember you guys saying, yeah, this might be kind of where he's at. And it sounds like he has definitely picked – he's sort of gotten a lot of his faculties back.

Yeah, I think so. And again, like we need to be careful. Like, he's not going to, you know, he's not going to live forever. But I think that Vives and I just feel very lucky that we had him without any scares of that manner for a long time. And for most, I mean, he's kind of been a cat with some mental issues, no joke, for a long time. But aside from that, like, besides from behavioral stuff, we hadn't really had to deal with any kind of real health emergencies. And so the fact that we kind of got, you know, as Lucille Ball, not Lucille Ball, Lucille Bluth says, that one's a freebie. You know, like I sort of feel like we get to appreciate it. When did she say that? There's a moment where she's mad at one of her kids, as you'd guess. I want to say that it's Buster. And she thinks Buster is in his bed sleeping.

And I believe she, like, takes a pole and beats him to death under the covers. But then it turns out that he had snuck away and she had only beaten a bunch of pillows. And she walks away and says, well, that one was a freebie.

Oh, Lucille. Here's some money. Go see a Star Wars. All right. Let's do this. Let's take a quick break because we have Dan Pashman waiting in the wings. And then when we come back, we'll hear about what's going on with this pasta project. And, of course, we will do some Blursdays, too, because it is a Thursday. Stay with us. This is TBTL.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go. Everybody rattle, dattle. Everybody rattle, dattle.

Let's thank some dazzling donors, the wonderful, generous people who are making this episode possible with their donation each month. Talking about John Paxton of Seattle, Washington. John says, so I'm a relatively new 10, and I'm just starting to get all these.

Does he talk like Kai Rizdahl?

I get the whole relatability thing. I'm a relatively new 10.

My Rizdahl impression is getting worse. You were doing a little bit of a voice on John, I felt like. I liked it. Yeah.

Mostly I'm bummed because I feel like my Kai Rizdahl is deteriorating. I feel like I had it quite dialed in for a while.

Is it too exaggerated now?

Yes, it's becoming a parody of the parody. John says, I was tempted to try to go into George Takei there. But I feel like when I did that George Takei impression the other day, that was the most genuine laugh I've heard from you probably since the pandemic started. And, like, I know if I try to do John's message in that voice, it will be a letdown.

Every time since then, it'll be just a little bit less, like you're chasing that dragon.

Yes, that happens with anything good on this show. I'm like a small child. You know, like if a kid says something and the adults laugh, and then the kid just absolutely just beats it into the ground because they don't understand that it's becoming less good with each recitation. Yeah, take a note, kids. Exactly. John Paxton is in Seattle, Washington. It says, so I'm relatively new 10, and I'm just starting to get all the lingo, but I need help on one point of clarification. so my fiance is my tbtl daddy okay and her mom is her tbtl daddy oh my so my question is in the words of george takei oh my um uh so is my future mother-in-law also my tbtl granddaddy wow man that's so many usages of that that i don't love but i probably yeah and i think you have to start calling her that i feel yes and i hope you'll be able to work it into one of the toasts at the

yeah i love that this is that the the wedding hasn't happened yet you have to i mean you said

toasts i thought you're gonna say ceremony sure i thought that might be kind of asking a lot but definitely one of the toasts also i i love reading this message because it's always we're so so um humbled by people who've listened to the show for 12 years or whatever but also people who've come to it relatively recently that that leaves us feeling quite chuffed because like it's amazing that that this is something that would be appealing to somebody in 2020 or 2021 so that's always uh kind of fun but i also think it's amazing that this lineage of this family so the uh the tbtl Well, granddaddy got her daughter listening to it and that actually worked, which seems crazy that somebody's mom would be like, you know, you should listen to this thing. And then that person was like, yeah, John's John's fiance was like, yeah. And then she got John to listen and then John's now donating. That's amazing.

Quick question. Then we'll move on to our second dazzling donor. Do you think, in all earnestness, do you think, aside from the actual wedding that happened at a TBTL live show, do you think TBTL has ever been included in anyone's wedding vows? Specifically the wedding vows. We wrote our own vows. We both bond over TBTL. And so on our wedding day, I'm going to make a little sly TBTL reference in the vows.

To have and to hold.

To throw. To phones do we throw. Yes, exactly, exactly.

If not, could somebody please do that and record it and send it to us? That might be the biggest ask. Like, we ask a lot of these listeners. That's a lot. We ask for them to, you know, if they can, to donate to the show. We ask them to email us. We ask them to tell their friends about it. And now we ask that somebody work a reference to the show into your actual wedding vows, please, and then let us know if that happens or if it has happened.

You can't name your kid TBTL? Come on. I thought you were a fan. What's going on? Yeah.

Maestro?

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go.

Everybody rattle, dattle.

We got to thank Holly Franz in Alexandria, Virginia. Holly says Franz, like hands. I would have messed that up without the pronunciation. Well, you know, it's interesting, Andrew, because from this very perch, you know I am staring at Franz Bakery. Oh. Exact same spelling. I'm looking at the production facility. I'm looking at this rotating giant loaf of bread, which I love. It's one of my very favorite things in Portland. Carbs. No carbs. And this is an all carbs episode, by the way, between the pasta and the Franz talk. But yeah, I think when I see that word, I think Franz. Like Hans and Franz. But it's Franz. Yeah, I got to remember that. We now know that. Holly says, long before TBTL was a shimmer in Jen's eye, my family had a motto. shared experience that anything we liked would be canceled. See, Wizards and Warriors, Greatest American Hero, Condor Man, and the best movie ever, Flash Gordon. Oh, also General Human Decency. I see. So Holly's point is nothing gold can stay. Would you like to take this opportunity to clarify what the show title should have been a week ago? About a week ago

we did a show where we were talking about steaks that were being served and they were like kind of gold encrusted with like gold flake place in miami yes exactly and i couldn't think of a good show title we didn't have anything in the show afterwards i was fumbling around i had to get it posted and i ended up with what oh stakes is gold no that's not it uh i came up with something pretty clunky and a listener wrote in and said i'll find it while you're you missed a great opportunity you should have named the show

nothing gold can stake yes nothing hold on do you want do we are you are you do you want me to tell

you what you actually named the original one was cash for gold stake because i was trying to do a play on the cash for gold places that you might see and i was like a cash for gold stake that's just it just wasn't there that just wasn't it like but i had to go with it because i didn't anything better and somebody wrote in i wasn't complaining about it but somebody just knew that I was not happy with that and somebody wrote in And said eh could have been nothing Gold can stake and I'm like yeah that's The one that's the one

Now listen if we're gonna point out Where we had a slightly missed opportunity let's point out Something you really hit out of the park Greta Van Feet Episode 3375

That's a good one we did that we came up with that together though I think or that might have just been straight up

How about if it's cello let it mellow March 15th that's good

Oh I gotta come I had I came Up with a game accidentally last night We gotta go back to the dazzling donor let me just say this quickly though maybe sometime next week if you don't have time to put together like to go digging for top stories that the listeners um how about friday how's friday for you yeah friday sounds good here's what i'm gonna do because i did this accidentally last night you know i write these descriptions and show titles usually pretty quickly after the show i try to be thoughtful about it but you know i post it and then i don't think about it anymore right especially the

descriptions i never go back and read them post it they post it and they forget exactly when do

they post it and so last night I had to go back and check something I think I messed up posting yesterday's show and then I was going back on my phone and making sure that it posted last night and it was fine and then I just started scrolling backwards in time and I was reading all the show descriptions and I would say for the past week and a half I'm like yep I remember that I remember that I remember that then I got to a show description where I'm like I don't remember what that story is and I think I would like to play a game with you where I start with the previous day's show and i read the description and you tell me what is the story that i'm referring to in the description and we see how far back we can go before you don't remember the stories either the ones that are written in the description of the show if that makes sense let's try this on

friday when i'm in la this will be fun and i um does it make sense to you did i explain that in a way that makes sense yeah it's like how like given contact like given given because we're We're intentionally a little vague in the show description because the idea is we want to kind of pique the interest but not just kind of literally lay out what happened and keep it a little bit on the more opaque side. So can I, using that sort of opaque information, find something that's more sort of specific?

Here's a perfect example. Don't answer this. We'll bring this up on Friday. But you go back a ways and one of the descriptions is Luke and Andrew celebrate a very special TBTL-versary, even though someone forgot. Do we remember what that anniversary was? Because right now, off the top of my head, I do not. I think I could get there, but I do not off the top of my head know exactly what that anniversary is. If you do know Luke, don't answer. Save it.

I know it right now, but I will have forgotten it by tomorrow.

Okay. I'm not kidding.

record it. Okay. Right after this. On the way to the airport, I'm going to record a third episode of TBTL. By the way, listener Holly, who we are honoring. Maestro?

On your mark. On your mark. Get set.

Now ready. As one of our donors, dazzling donors today, listener Holly continues in her message. Everything good will be canceled. TBTL didn't disappoint, so we nailed it on being canceled, but you persevered and broke the curse. All right. And as a result, the sense of community and human decency expanded since i haven't had to pay for therapy during covet times it seemed appropriate to offset the cost to my imaginary and real network of tens that are just as helpful from virginia in fort worth you rock to the dc metro tens i may get to see again sometime hashtag worth it thank you all for validating shame eating drinking while walking the dogs, eagles soaring, crazy distances, relationship, realities, ups and downs, and so much more. And then Holly says, can you play the kid learning to ride his bike drop? Or the old lady neighbor who says it does not bother me. I got the bike one here. Can we start with that? Yeah, are you able to play that whilst playing the razzle-dazzle music, or should you? I think I'm going to have to get rid of that, and then we'll come back with this.

What, do you got any words of wisdom? what about for all the other kids trying to learn how to ride their bike can you say anything to them

And then you can get better and better at it if you do it.

Give me some thumbs up.

Thumbs up, everybody, for rock and roll.

I love the dad's delight at the end, too. He didn't know that. He was going to nail it for rock and roll.

It does not bother me. In fact, I kind of like it because I know there's somebody around.

I got to find the full tape on that somewhere. That's all I have of it does not bother me, which was, I believe the woman's name was Gladys. I may be actually combining two people in my mind who we play tape. There was one very sort of fun and spunky older woman who was played on the Ellen DeGeneres show that we kind of fell in love with for a while. And then there was this call, which was somebody called one of our listeners because they were worried because their kid had gotten like a heavy bag they were punching. And so they either called or left a note for their neighbor to say, let us know if this is too loud for you. and the neighbor called and basically said, I love it because it lets me know somebody's over there.

Oh, it's so sweet. I love that so much.

Woke up this morning, got some gabagoo. Then I woke up the next day and got some gabagoo.

You know, that music can only mean one thing. It's time to talk pasta.

That music can mean anything these days. It sure can. You can play it all the time.

It sure can. It can mean I'm having a good day. It can mean I'm having a bad day. It could mean it's time to talk to our friend Dan Pashman from the Sporkful Podcast, which is what it actually means today. Joining us from out on Long Island, I believe, is Dan Pashman. Hey, buddy.

Hey, you guys. How are you?

Are you familiar with the gabagool meme that's been making its rounds?

Yes, it is pretty awesome, especially like as someone who grew up in the New York area, for sure. Yeah, look, if that is my intro music for the rest of my life, I'll take it.

I know it's not like exactly on topic for your pasta project.

No, it's close enough. I'll take it.

Maybe someone will remix it to be about Cascatelli. Let's start at the beginning of this whole thing for you. Well, first of all, hi, it's nice to talk to you. We've missed you.

Hey, you guys too. Luke, I just need to tell you very quick, I loved your segment Sunday morning on CBS. It was a classic Burbank segment, and I thought you looked very handsome.

Thank you.

I was impressed with which buttons on your jacket you chose to button, and that's not a look I could have pulled off. I was like, oh, second and third, but not fourth. Interesting. Very, very shrewd. I liked it.

Well, there's – okay. I have many responses to that. comment so the first one is that was a whole conversation with the sound guy about he was like oh which button are you gonna unbutton your jacket or button the whole thing

i was no one button because i have to create a waste for myself like the sense that i have a waste which i kind of don't anymore right and so that was actually the button in that interview with brent musburger was a subject of conversation in las vegas when i was filming it i appreciated you saying a nice thing uh in response because i was pointing out your conversation with our pal rachel martin on morning edition and then you responded with that nice thing about me looking stylish i couldn't hit love or like on the tweet because then i'm at that point getting high on my own supply if you're saying hey luke you looked stylish if i respond by liking it it's me admitting i look stylish which let's be honest i know but i can't publicly confirm that now i agree with that

by the way i think a heart there is a thank you i think that's a thanks dan i see you i see this

and i thank you i'm with andrew yeah like thanks i appreciate that positive feedback that's what

the heart means okay well i'm gonna go back and heart it later now the other thing is dan you You taught me something many years ago. How long ago did we work on the Bryant Park Project?

Jeez, I think we started together in 2007.

Oh, jeez. You guys are old.

Yeah. So, gosh, 14 years ago.

I remember you coming in to the office, and you had, like, the bottom three buttons of your collared shirt were unbuttoned. Wow. And you told me it was a strategy that you had employed when you would take the train into work, which was if you have your button up shirt all buttoned the whole time, then sometimes it'll make the bottom of your shirt a little bit wrinkly. And so the key is to kind of undo a few buttons. And then when you get to work, then you button it back up and then you're looking good for the whole day. And I have since that moment always done that everywhere. If you were to see me driving to a TV shoot, you will see the bottom three buttons of my shirt unbuttoned so as to preserve them because of the advice of one Dan Pashman.

Oh, my God. That's so funny. And I forgot that advice, and yet I noticed your button set up on TV. So it took 14 years. We've come full circle.

You're always life hacking things, huh? I realize that, you know, a big part of what we're going to talk about today is, you know, just trying to maximize, you know, you're always trying to maximize the eating experience or the food experience. But, like, this button thing, that was, like, kind of a life hack that had nothing to do with food. Like, were you a little kid, like, just always finding ways to improve the mundane things we do in life?

Yeah, I mean, like, I've always been a person who puts an inordinate amount of thought into things. And, yes, I get a lot of pleasure from sort of, like, studying the finer details of things. and coming up with, like, solutions. And some of them are totally half-baked or ineffective, you know. But then once in a while, they actually work. Once in a while, you mention one to your coworker, 14 years later, he still remembers it.

Honestly, I've carried that through my life. And so just so you know, I'll be, like, in some random town about to go do a TV thing, and I'll think, oh, yeah, Dan Pashman. Like, that will come into my brain as I'm unbuttoning the bottom three buttons.

I'm very honored by that. Thank you.

I think I've brought this up before in conversations that we've had, Dan, you know, on this show and other shows. But I remember my first awareness of your like specific, really, really detailed thoughts around food was you were explaining to me tailgating at a New York Giants game and something with the sausage that you were bringing out there. And there was a really specific system about how it was bagged up and what kind of bag it was in. I know you're not really like a football person anymore.

I'm still a football fan, not as much as I used to. But, yeah, I would guess that that was that I was like partially boiling the sausages in beer the night before to partially cook them. And then I had to store them and then it would be spill proof and it would hold them, you know, at the right temperature. And then you put them on the grill to finish them in the parking lot. I also have a system to do like for a one o'clock game on the East Coast would do like egg and cheese sandwiches in the parking lot. and I'll cook scrambled eggs the evening before like into patties and put them in a Ziploc bag in the fridge and then you take them out and just throw them on the grill for 30 seconds to heat them rather than you don't want to do it with a pan in the parking lot. That way you've got the eggs and then you're just like basically toasting rolls and melting cheese on the grill and slapping the egg patties in there. So, yeah, look, this is why, though, Andrew, to give you a better response to your earlier question. Like, you know, when Luke and I worked on that show at NPR together and then the show got canceled, it was around that time that I said to myself, you know, or like it was around the time that friends of mine were saying, you should start a podcast because they kind of knew that I wanted to host something eventually. And I was like, well, what can my podcast be? And I started brainstorming like what, you know, I didn't think the world needed another like, you know, guy on a bar stool with opinions about sports. And it didn't need, you know, someone else with an opinion on politics. Those are the other things that I was interested in. I was like, well, what about food? And I realized I kind of always had an idiosyncratic course.

hyper detailed obsessive approach to food um and so i was like that's what my podcast should be and you know the show has changed and evolved a lot over the 11 years since i started it but um but when i especially when i first started this pork full it was very much driven by that by this idea of like let's spend 25 minutes talking about the ideal surface area to volume ratio of ice cubes

yeah right but you know i want to say dan too like kudos to you really have the show really has evolved over the years and i mean i love the the production now and the way that it's really kind of it's it's you know still has elements of its early days but it's really it's changed it takes on some you know really serious topics and like important things and it's like it's just a it's just a really good show man and and like as as somebody whose show has devolved over the 12 years myself uh i really admire that you've evolved your show and also that this like this this sort of i don't want to say third act because that sounds like you're like you know you're not long for this world but this project around this pasta is amazing to me and it's like it's so genius and like can you start with like kind of when did you start to really think about like

developing your own pasta yeah so it started i mean you know i i was you know when the big podcasting boom hit in you know 20 i don't know 2015 or so you know i i listened of course to all the seminal, you know, to serial and to start up Alex Bloomberg's podcast, number the Planet Money t-shirt thing. And so, you know, when all those things were hitting, of course, I think any creative person, you hear that, you see those things, you know, and you think like, wow, someday I want to do my version of that. I want to tell some epic story, and especially like the Planet Money t-shirt thing and startup, which were both about like creating a product or starting a business. I was like, you know, someday I want to do a multi-part like epic story where I set out to create a new food. So that was just sort of like a creative ambition that I had that I wanted to do. And then it became like, well, what should the food be?

What's this ambition you speak of? I'm not familiar with that word. Because I heard those same series and at no time did I have the wherewithal to think, oh, we should do that. Like, I was just like, damn, these shows is good. And you were like, hey, I'm going to do that someday. And now you did it and it's really awesome.

Well, you know, Luke, we each have our own style, you know, that's cool. Not everyone has to, but that was what I wanted to do. And I was like, well, what should the food be? And so I had a few rules for what food I wanted to make. The first was I wanted it to be a very simple, basic, universal food. I didn't want anything kind of fancy or obscure. Then I wanted it to be a food that was relatively inexpensive. I knew I wouldn't be able to compete with big companies, but even if it was going to be an expensive version of the thing, I still wanted it to be affordable for most people. And then I wanted it to be shelf-stable so it could be shipped at least within the continent of the United States. I didn't want it to be a thing that would only exist in boutique-y stores. I wanted sporkful listeners anywhere in the country to be able to get it to participate.

And that's how you ended up with liver pate, right? Limited run beluga caviar pate.

Yeah, I just dump it into a paper bag and put it in an envelope.

Yeah, no, that's the TBTL way.

Yeah. And so then I thought, you know, pasta, checked all those boxes. And then the idea of making a new pasta shape in particular, just like, you know, I've, you know, like, the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was perfect. because it fits into everything that I love about food and it gets me excited and it is kind of quintessential about the sporkful, which is like it's this pasta shapes are the kind of thing that the average person doesn't think that much about. You might have a couple of shapes you especially like, but how much time have you really spent pondering it? Not much. But when you do start to think about it, you have the reaction that we often get to the sporkful, which I love. It's like the most rewarding reaction is people say, I never knew I had such strong opinions about that. And I love that reaction. It's like you're realizing something about yourself and also about food, and it changes the way that you relate to that food forever. Like, you know, once I spend 20 minutes talking with you about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, you will never forget that every time you eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, you're going to think about that. And so, like, that's a fun thing to, like, unlock in someone's brain that, you know, and then, you know, and so that was it. So from there, I was off, you know, but that was still like, you know, I had that initial germ of an idea four or five years ago. I didn't really start working on it until three years ago, but it's been three years. It was three years since I really said I'm doing this to the time that, you know, to now, to the time that the pasta actually came out.

So did you initially, like, so you kind of did this kind of whiteboard experiment or whatever of, like, what fits all these categories?

And then you came up with pasta. And then did you say, now I have to figure out how to improve pasta? And is that where the kind of, you know, the tenets of sporkful life came into it in terms of forkability and sauceability and stuff?

Yeah, yeah, right. So I got these terms that I invented that are basically my metrics for pasta shapes. There's forkability, how well does it stay in the fork? Sauceability, how well does sauce adhere? Tooth sinkability, how satisfying does it sink your teeth into it? So I just went out. I ate every pasta shape I could get my hands on. I went to specialty stores all around the New York area. I got all kinds of obscure shapes, the ones that I had never had or hadn't had in a long time. And I started sort of cataloging attributes and really like thinking in a more scientific, methodical way. Like, do I like flat shapes or ruffled shapes or ridge shapes or tubes or long or short? And I zeroed in on one shape. After that first round of testing, I zeroed in on a shape called Mafalda. Mafalda, also known as Mafaldina, if you picture like a fettuccine, long, flat noodle, except down the edges there are ruffles. It's a lot like a lasagna, but narrow enough to wrap around your fork. It's a long shape, and I love Mafalda. I had had it before, but then when I was testing, I sort of fell back in love with it.

It's also apparently the French version of, like, I Love Lucy. Because when I just Googled Mafalda, I'm probably misspelling it. I'm getting a French cartoon. How do you spell it?

M-A-F-A-L-D-E.

Oh, okay. There you go. I had it misspelled. Okay. Now I'm looking at Mafalda.

All right. So, you know, it's just like it has all the good things about fettuccine. Like, you know, you can wrap it around the fork, you get a very tooth-thinkable bite. But the ruffles add so much more. They pick up more sauce. They're playful in your mouth. So I started with Mafalda. I said, that's my base canvas. Where can I go from there? And then, I mean, there's this whole big back and forth. So, like, you know, we did this five-part podcast series on the Sporkful that tells the whole epic quest to create this shape in great detail. And, like, with a lot of emotional ups and downs and total disasters. And, like, my wife is stressed about it. My kids are involved. It's a saga. So I hope that people will check that out. But we'll give you a couple of spoilers here, but there's a lot more in the series.

Don't give the store away. Like, you know, don't feel like you have to, like, just because we've been friends for 14 years, you know, and we go way back, Dan. Don't feel like you have to give us special treatment. I want to incentivize people to go listen to The Sporkful.

I appreciate that. I mean, the shape's out there, so you know that we get a shape at the end. But, like, we couldn't possibly cover the whole five-part series in this episode, so I'm not too worried about it, Luke.

I usually also, in interviews like this, Dan, I cut out everything except for my jokes anyway. So, you know, don't even worry about it, Tumor. Don't stress. All right, sorry, I keep interrupting you with a really bad joke. Sorry, go ahead. You have the floor.

No, no, no, no. So then I also got into Bucatini, which a lot of people love. I was very skeptical of Bucatini. It's like a spaghetti that's hollow down the center, like a drinking straw. But I kind of discovered what makes it great, and I said I want to marry Befalda and Bucatini. And that was kind of where I set up. But then it turns out that the way that I first wanted to do it was impossible. Because then I had to actually get it made. That was part of my quest. It wasn't like anyone could dream up a pasta shape. I wanted to actually get it manufactured and be able to sell it. So dreaming up the shape was only the very first step.

now that's the part that really that's the part dan that that i'm deeply impressed by because i've been hearing about this kind of around the way like oh dan's working on a pasta and i i honestly thought like oh he's probably just doing a really intensive survey of like what's the best kind of pasta and i only realized like a week ago that you physically now have a line of pasta that people can buy that's so crazy like where like who how do you who makes the pasta how did you get them to do it and if you want it to be widely available i mean just the like sort of supply chain of that and and all that is the scale of it is just that's intense right like how did you make that happen

yeah i'm learning a lot about supply chains that i didn't know um so i mean basically what i to do it i needed two things the first was i needed a die a die d-i-e it's like the mold for the shape So, like, you remember the Play-Doh factory? You push the Play-Doh through that little circle-shaped disc with a star-shaped hole? Yes. And the dough comes out like a star. That little circle disc with the star-shaped hole, that's a die. And that is how pasta is made. You take a dough and you push it through a hole. And whatever the shape of the hole is, that's the pasta shape that comes out. But – But pasta shapes are obviously more complicated than that. And you need – there's only one guy in America today who actually designs and manufactures pasta dyes. So it took me months to get to him and to get him to pay any attention to me. And then – because he makes the dyes for like Kraft mac and cheese, the mac in the Kraft mac and cheese box, he makes that dye. So he was – he just was like not interested in hanging out with me. And so I had to finally sort of nag him into submission. Then it turned out the shape I wanted wasn't possible as I wanted it. When the dough goes through the die and you form the shape, that happens in a split second. And in that split second, you can only do so much. And so the movement that would be required to create the ruffles in the shape would crush the tube part that I wanted.

Got it.

So we then had to go back to the drawing board, and there was a lot of back and forth with the die maker. Then we had a shape that was physically possible, but I didn't like the way that it was cooking up. So I delayed the project for months more in order to make the whole shape thicker. And that cost me an additional several thousand dollars and pushed the project back months, all to add half the thickness of a credit card. Jeez. Wow. Right.

That was like the – we just got a little view. The curtain was pulled back on a man who is excited that this has really taken off but also been working his ass off for three years on it. That was just like – that was the sound of pure exhaustion.

What's that? Yes. Do you know where I was yesterday afternoon? I was at the dentist because I hurt my tooth from clenching my teeth for too much.

Oh, no.

From the past. Oh. Yeah, yeah.

Well, it's going well, by the way.

I literally have a toothache. Oh. It's going very well. I can't complain. Like, yeah.

Are you getting a lot more attention on this and, like, positive feedback than even you were, like, hoping for? Because I feel like right now you can't, you know, you can't swing a spaghetti noodle without hitting Dan Pashman somewhere talking about this project, which makes me so happy for you, Dan. I feel like it's gotten a huge amount of attention.

It has, yeah. I mean, it's very, very exciting. I can't, you know, people say, like, is this beyond your wildest dreams? Is it what you expected? You know, like, honestly, my hopes, there are expectations and then there are hopes. And both my expectations and my hopes were, you know, in the lead up to this launch, have been swinging so wildly, you know, from, you know, high to low. You know, from any 15 minutes difference, you could ask me what I was thinking was going to happen. I would have told you something different, you know. I feel like I have eaten so much pasta that when I finally got to the final version of this pasta, So I was like, I think this is amazing, but I also don't know if I know what's good anymore.

Right.

So I had a real crisis of confidence. Like, I think it's good. Is it good? I don't know. Then I started sharing it with a few select people whose opinions I value, and they were like, this is amazing. They were all like, we thought it was cute that you were making a pasta sheet, but this is actually really good. So that was very exciting. And then now it's on sale and people are going bananas for it. So, yeah, you know, like, yeah, it's a very weird feeling to, like, have this plan, this idea, and then, like, to be working on it for so long and then have it actually pan out. It's like, you're like, wait, is this, you know, I don't know how to, like, it's hard to describe it without, like, slipping into, like, lame cliches, but it's very bizarre.

I'm amazed by the amount of food idioms that are just casually in your speech, by the way. Things are bananas. Are things going to pan out? Everything comes back to the kitchen. Yeah. Sorry, Lou. This is his lived experience.

Don't extend that metaphor to – don't try to come up with too many more of those, Andrew. You might realize you've bitten off more than you can see. Oh, no. Wow. I've created a lot. Okay. Time to get to the Blur's days.

If you go to Sporkful.com, by the way, you can buy this pasta, although it looks like you were already sold out of some amounts of it dan well it's not it's not i mean i wouldn't say

it's sold out it's just you know we're taking orders but you know we're because the demand has been overwhelming it's going to take you eight to ten weeks before you get the pasta but i think it'll be well worth the wait to go buy some but uh it's porkfull.com is the link and also i hope that people will listen to our podcast series because um i just think it's a fun story

yeah i i mean the other thing too dan not to get overly dramatic with things but like have you had the thought like okay this was this was something to talk about on your podcast and and it was a fun project and it's it's sort of going well but someday this i mean it's conceivable that cascatelli might be your great legacy right like when we're all gone and and

And, like, you know, podcasting isn't even a thing. It's just like a hologram that just downloads into your brain or whatever. People might be eating this pasta, right? Like, people, I guess in this weird future, we have holograms in our brain, but we're still eating a lot of pasta. It's still a carb-heavy society. But, like, you know what I mean? Like, this could really be a thing that, like, goes on long after you.

Yes. When the shape first came out, and it went so crazy so quickly, yes, the thought crossed my mind, like, what if this is a thing that I'm remembered for? Like, what if my obituary says, like, Dan Pashman, creator of Cascatelli Pasta, dead at – I'm 44 now. Dead at 44.

Severe pasta intake over the course of three years.

Right, right. so uh uh right yes i mean that you know it's uh you know maybe i just you know it's easier to get to feel wistful or to think about those things as you get older i mean uh so i am about turn 44 and you start to think like you know like whatever i don't mean to get too philosophical but like we all i think that we all like to feel like we're moved like you know the arrows are pointed upward in some respect like you want to feel like your best days are still ahead of you and that you're you're growing towards something um and then like at a certain point you must like you have to get to a point in life where like whether or not you want to admit it you're like well i've probably turned that corner you know and um it doesn't mean there can't be still like great joy and what and like you can't still get a lot out of life but you still have to sort of realize that like most of it's in the rearview mirror now or like the biggest best crazy you know highlights are in the rearview mirror now and so it's like lately i've just been thinking about like well how do you know when you've got i guess you don't know that you turned that corner until until you've turned it already you know uh but yeah it's never thinking about more lately well um i think i think

about that all the time like i have taken to referring to myself as being on the back nine now you know and i i know exactly what you mean like like that feeling of kind of like have i the most output and the most meaningful output that i that i have in me from like a job perspective or from a making my mark perspective has that now happened and i'm at as now am i on the glide path and i definitely sort of feel like that a little bit which is why i've been so excited for you dan and so impressed that you like pulled this off and that it is getting the reaction it's getting because it's, like, such a cool thing, man. And, yeah, it could really live on past you. Like, something that was started as somewhat of a lark doesn't mean that people might not still be eating this because it's just a more, like, from a design standpoint, it's a better kind of pasta.

Yeah. No, right, 100%. You know, and I'm, like, but also, like, there were parts of me, you know, when things were not going well and I was, like, this is so stupid. Why am I doing this? that i was like i just right like you know it's like you i go back and forth between like wanting to be on that glide path of like okay like i've gotten to a point in my career where like i don't have to feel like it's it might all disappear tomorrow or the rug's gonna get pulled out from under me and like we're on stable footing here and i can just sort of like you know take it you know slow down a little bit and and rest assured um but then i so then i'm like i gotta leave it all out on the field for this project because this is going to be the thing that's going to get me to that yes and i'm like but i don't know do you ever really feel that way truly like that you can glide and like and then i also wonder like but is it really good to feel that way like on some days i'm like oh it'd be so great to just like be able to like chill a little bit and glide and feel like not to do nothing but just to like work in a way that doesn't feel like the stakes are so high um but then also like you know uh some amount of that feeling i think is good for you like it's good to feel a little bit like not 100 percent comfortable and to like push yourself to do more but then like there's too much of that i don't know i go back and forth ambition ambition is a

double-edged sword i my my analogy for it is i feel like i'm constantly i'm on the side of i'm on a cliff and i'm on a lick a little ledge and i look up above me and i think that's the ledge if i can get up to that ledge it's wide enough that i can just lie down and just relax and then i get up to that ledge and then i realize no this one is not actually as wide as i thought it was the one that's a little above that's the one that's where you can really just relax and so just get to that ledge and then you just like spend your whole life continuing to get to the next ledge or try to listen before we let you go dan uh andrew has a very a very important food

question for you yeah and just for the record i'm ready i peaked in 2003 guys it's fucking wonderful i'm not even joking it's just so great gliding to not care why about anything i've got i'm seriously like every time i'm in any kind of a retail shop i'm like yeah i can work here when i

get fired anyway um wants to work at a either at a small regional hotel or a movie theater yeah so when those things come back online we're losing him yes he's out of here or a grocery

store actually i'm very into grocery stores the people at the grocery store keep complimenting my bagging skills but we can't go we can't talk about that now because i'll never shut up but here's an important question this is why we really had you on today i think um this has been an ongoing debate and i'm going to be very careful how i ask this question i'm going to start by reading to you a trivia question that was offered up on a zoom trivia night by a friend of ours recently that caused quite a controversy the question is this you don't have to answer this dan that's not the point here but you you can take a stab at it if you want what condiment was invented sometime between 1900 and 1904 somewhere along the u.s canada border on an archipelago in the st lawrence river oh my god and again you don't have to answer i'll give you some space

if you want to take a stab at it this sounds like the kind of question that like uh everyone in michigan knows the answer to yes or canada right um are we putting you on the spot do you

want to take a pass by the way dan i don't okay the the good news is we don't as andrew's pointed out that we did not bring you here to answer the question so don't worry about that question about

the question okay right right right no yeah i i i can't even i can't even think of a good guess

and i think actually that's good because i think that's going to bolster my argument the answer to this question dan pashman was thousand island dressing which raised a ruckus Because the question is what condiment was invented sometime between 1900 and 1904, which raised this entire question, which seems like a Pashmini question is Thousand Island or even for that sake, ranch. Are those things considered condiments are dressings, condiments? And I think that's a two prong question. You can answer that by the dictionary definition. But more importantly, is this a misleading trivia question to call it a condiment in the question when the answer is Thousand Island?

so you've asked me two questions you brought two questions to my court today and true this

on the day of my daughter's wedding you asked me these two questions

this is a question i have pondered it will not surprise you to hear um and i have i have come to the conclusion that so when you talk about condiments sauces dressings dips or ingredients There are a lot of, for lack of a better word, substances that could be any one of those things. Ketchup, we think of first off as a condiment. But if you squirt some ketchup on the side and you dip your fries into it, is it then a dip? And ketchup is also an ingredient in my wife's recipe for meatloaf. So then it's an ingredient. And so I would say it could go on. Ranch dressing is an ingredient in other sauces. or it could be a spread on a sandwich. So what I have decided is that these are foodstuffs. They are substances. And what you want to call them depends on how it's being used. That being said, I do think that certain of the things that fit into these are most commonly known. Like barbecue sauce can be a dip. It can be an ingredient. It can be a condiment. but we think of it as a sauce, because we call it barbecue sauce. Thousand Island dressing is known as Thousand Island dressing. That's what we think of it as. Now, so I think that the real truth is, like, it's very murky. What is a dressing versus a condiment, sauce, dip, ingredient, spread? It depends on the use, what's correct. But I think that you are right in the context of a trivia question. they should refer to it as a dressing because that is how it's most commonly known. Like, you know, if it said dressing, if it said what dressing was invented, and the answer was ketchup.

Right.

You know, or mayonnaise. You'd be like, well, that's ridiculous. That's not a dressing. But, like, you know, but you could put mayonnaise on your salad. Does that make it a, you know, like, especially if you make a potato salad with mayonnaise, isn't that then the dressing? You know, so I think that you're right that it's a poorly worded question.

All right. Thank you. I will isolate this audio and send it to the quiz master. That's all.

That was really the whole reason that Andrew wanted to have you on the show today, Dan, not because of your wildly successful new pasta that you invented or the – The hit podcast, The Sporkful, or even Our Long-Running Friendship was none of those things. So you would say those magic words. You were right, Andrew. That's right. That was a poorly worded question. So thank you for giving him that on this Thursday.

Andrew, I'm here for you anytime. Thank you. I needed a win here.

Well, hey, Dan, seriously, man, congratulations on the project and all the attention it's getting. Everybody go to The Sporkful. Listen to the show. I don't know what the—I don't really understand the economics of pasta. I don't know if you're rich now from the pasta, but my guess is you still need people to download the Sporkful and listen to it. So go do that as well, everybody.

Yes, I'm not rich. And either way, I hope people will listen to the story. It's a good story. Yeah, man.

Well, Dan, thanks for coming on the show and congrats. And hopefully we'll talk soon.

Yeah, my pleasure. Be well, you guys. Take care.

Bye now. All right, man.

Hey, I didn't hang up on a mid word. I thought that's the shtick. Everything's coming up Walsh. All right. Let's get in some Blur's Days here. Our pal Melly in New York says, Happy Blur's Day to me. I know I sounded super depressed last year because I was. And though I'm still unhappy about getting older, I feel a little better, maybe because I got through the year with myself and my family intact. Maybe it's the antidepressants. But Melly also says.

Maybe she's born with it.

Maybe it's the Zoloft. Write that down as a possible show title. Melly also says, I'm sorry that I forgot last year that David Z is my birthday co-bro. I want to wish him a happy Blur's Day. I hope you and yours are doing well, and I hope there will be some kind of safe meetup to meet this summer. All right. Well, happy Blur's Day, Melly.

Yeah, Melly. Glad to hear that you're feeling a little bit better. through whatever kind of means and remedies that that's happening. I'm glad to hear it. And yeah, we're definitely going to be getting together with y'all as soon as it's something that we can do in a safe manner. Chris says I'd like to send a Blur's Day shout out to my lovely wife Liz for her 11th 29th Blur's Day. At first you're like

these are kids who are married and they're Turning 11 together. So I like the pause you put in there.

Well, it's also that I'm not going to do, out of respect for Liz, I'm not going to do the math on what her 11th, 29th birthday is.

Well, do the next sentence, though, because it's right there. That's right.

She's turning. Oh, well, spoiler alert. Liz, I want you to know I had your back. I was willing to just assume you were 29 11 times over and to just not interrogate that any further. But then Chris goes on to say, that's right, she's turning the big 4-0. She is a wonderful mother to our two girls and has been doing an excellent job as a work-from-home educator over this last year. I love you, Liz. Happy 40th Blur's Day. Oh, that's very sweet. And my goodness, Andrew, the work that educators are doing and have been doing to try to keep kids engaged remotely. I have lots of friends, and my sister Hannah is an educator. To know what they've gone through while trying to take care of their own families, it's really something. So, Liz, happy Blur's Day, and thanks for everything you've been doing. I mean, especially because, you know, teaching was such an easy job before.

Right. Like, we took the hardest. Yeah, you don't talk about a glide path. Yeah, we took, like, the hardest, one of the most underappreciated jobs in the world and important jobs in the world, and we just made it a million times harder. So, much respect. Happy Blurs Day. Hey, Nick, the Perfect Ten. Hey. No longer in Florida, Luke. Oh. In Minnesota now. Whoa, getting ever closer to hosting the show That's right, Nick says Although it was last week I want to give a very happy Blur's Day to The Perfect Daddy Jake in Chicago Of course, Jake is the person who is Working on the Drops of Stupider 2 contest We'll be updating that in the coming weeks Nick says I totally missed it last year and I still feel bad Thanks for introducing me to the show And always using your nickname whenever you possibly can Everyone go vote on your favorite TV show moment in the drops of stupider

Kira says happy blurs day to Jamie

The longest running co-bro of my life. After last year's Blur's Day message, Luke gave you crap for only being a ten and a half. I don't remember that specifically, but that sounds like something I would have done. So this year for your birthday, I'm declaring you a casual ten. That's interesting. I like that. There's something about the TBTL, the casual collection. I like it. Yeah, that's kind of a different, like a ten and a half sounds like, yeah, you're on the fence. A casual ten sounds like, yeah, you choose to casually interact with the content. I love you and hope all of your dreams come true. on your 35th year around the sun. Love, your wife, Kira. Happy Blur's Day, Jamie.

All right, special Blur's Day family message here for Lauren, who's turning 35. Langley Grace says, please let mommy know that she's a hardworking... Nope, let me redo that. Sorry, Langley Grace, who says, please let mommy know that she's hardworking and kind and we love her very much. Puddle, who is a human and three and a half years old, says, We hope she gets a beautiful dress with dandelions on it and a hat with pretty dandelions. And Mike says, Happy Quarantine Blur's Day to my wonderful 11. It says one here. I think I made a mistake in editing this, though. I'm going to assume that that's an 11. She's always made our family work. And in 2021, she's gone into overdrive. Thanks for all that you do. Happy Blur's Day, Lauren.

Is it possible that he just means wonderful one? Like the one who is wonderful?

To my wonderful one. My wonderful wife? My guess is I have a typo in there, and that's my fault, though.

Well, you know what? Let's work on that for next year, Lauren. Let's go from being a wonderful 11 to being the wonderful one. That's right. Who listens to the show each and every day. Balls in your car. Bet says, my five, Lucy, is turning 11 on Saturday. She's compassionate and loving and a smart girl. She takes care of her friends and just generally looks out for others. So happy Blur's Day to my little poo bear. Bob and I love you so much. I, if I remember right, think maybe Lucy was on a Zoom call where we were seeing some kind of high-tech Lego situation going on out there in the New York State area.

That's right. I think Lucy did join us for that call. Happy Blur's Day, Lucy. and finally TT says I'd like to wish a happy Blurs Day to my five Ellie who is turning 23 and has turned into a 10 she spent hours listening to TBTL in the backseat on our road trips and is a proud dad my heart beat faster when she shared that she introduced the magic of TBTL to her confused friends on a road trip of their own she's an amazing kid thanks for helping us bond that is awesome happy Blurs Day Ellie Ellie, by the way, awesome name.

Thanks for the note, TT. That is going to happen more and more, I think, Andrew. The children of TBTL, as this goes on, there are going to be, this happened with Addie, where you're subjected to something. She's subjected to tons of public radio and certain kinds of indie music, and kind of, you know, in her teenage years, wanted to forge her own identity. But then at some point in her 20s, it's like those things that you kind of sort of hated as a kid or tolerated, They feel they remind you of a different time in your life and you sort of reconnect with them. There's going to be a whole generation of like 25-year-olds who start listening to TBTL because it reminds them of when they were 10-year-olds and being tortured by this shit.

Yes, exactly. And they're like, wow, these guys got even older. Their stories got even longer and less relevant to my life. Hey, I want to go out with a food-related song. The only one I can think of, I feel like it's always a little bit cheaty when I just go with Weird Al because it's so on the nose. but we could go out with Eat It by Weird Al unless you have something else that's slightly more clever but I'm putting you on the spot We don't have any pasta songs? Well that's what I was looking up here. Pasta songs Let's see what happens. Internet. What do you got for me? How about That's Amore When the Moon Hits Your Eye Like a Big Pizza Pie?

Luke, when you got it, you got it Or of course we can always go out with this one

I am hearing from so many tens who are like this song will not leave my head and we had a little bit of a reprieve like it left all of our heads like i was waking up four days in a row with it and i changed the lyrics to woke up this morning gobble in my head because that's where it's stuck man i love it all right let's go out

with a little uh that's a moray because let's be honest pizza and pasta it's kind of the same thing it's cheese it's wheat it's delicious all right thanks for listening today everyone we're gonna be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you so please do join us for that until then happy blurs day to everybody from this week have a great rest of your thursday uh please stay safe and and also remember no mountain too tall and good luck to all. Like a guitar and that laugh When the stars make you drool Just like a pastefas Ooh, that's amore When you dance down the street With a cloud at your feet You're in love When you walk in a dream But you know you're not dreaming power out