Muse

Okay, everyone got a celebrity name in? Alright, team one, you're up.

Okay, he was in Ocean's Eleven.

Matt Tiemann.

No, um, he has a tequila, silver fox.

Uh, George Clooney.

Yes, okay, um, she was a pretty woman.

Julie Roberts.

Yes, okay, um, alright, I guess this is a musician.

John Mayer.

No, older. Time. Goddamn, it's jazz legend Marcus the Worm Hicks.

Okay, who put that in?

That one might be one of mine.

Okay, team two, we're up. Howie, you go first.

All right, this guy ran with Thaddeus Finks. He was one of the eight balls in Mookie Kramer in the eight ball. I don't know, this doesn't sound like anything. He played the alto sax with the kink in it. I don't know.

Not sure.

Really? Okay, pass. Okay, this one's easy. He's got the freak lips. He can hit the high C all night long. He was king of the tuck-tuck sound. Is this another jazz guy?

Time. Ah, come on, guys.

We didn't get one.

That's because they're supposed to be celebrities everyone knows.

Oh, you mean like household names like Roy Donk or Jack Marshall who wrote the Munsters theme song? Roy Donk?

Oh, I think this one's Howie's. Yep, I don't know what to do.

Just, what was it?

Tiny Boop Squig Shorterly.

What, I mean, come on, is that even a celebrity? He's no Roy Donk, but he was a regular guest on the Colgate Hour. TBTL!

It's the first line of the film, man. It's got to be on the money here.

Hey, baby. Hey, baby, yo.

I just feel like I'm excited and I feel relaxed and I'm ready to party with the best of them.

If there's a better use for the internet, I haven't found it.

All right, hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Wednesday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

Is it too early to get a fish sandwich?

My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host. You want to do a make-believe radio show in a room somewhere. I'm telling you, there's no money in that. Coming to you from the Nest Broadcast Center, high in the sky, above Portland, Oregon, where we are once again dealing with an absolutely beautiful day. California got sunshine. It's been an absolutely splendid week here in the 503. And we have a splendid show in store for you. It's episode 3,401 in a collector series.

Let the fun begin.

And we will bring you what I think is maybe the most brutally honest And yet somehow most compelling ad ever for adopting a dog, a chihuahua that is I'll just read this verbatim from the person that is putting this person has been fostering this chihuahua. I am convinced at this point he is not a real dog, but more like a vessel for a traumatized Victorian child that now haunts our home. And anyway. I'll say, what's up, dog? Considering trying to adopt this chihuahua from New Jersey named Prancer, we'll read you the full ad. Also, hmm, this is sad. So who needs a movie? The Arclight in Los Angeles, and I guess the other Arclights that have sprung up over the years. The Arclight is going out of business, which is a real bummer. A real sort of film, sort of central kind of locus in the film industry, I would say, or at least just the experience of watching films in, of all places, Los Angeles, the home of films, is going out of business. So we'll talk about what is going on with that. And also, of course, we are rolling along with the TBTL Drops of Stupider, The Deuce. This is an attempt to figure out the most memorable moment in TBTL history.

Memories are made in your mouth.

Day six of the TBTL Drops of Stupider contest will happen today. Plus emails and V-mails and, of course, this guy. The longest-running co-bro of the show. He may be best known for his depictions of the tall ships. I'll tell you what. It's just Walsh Man's World. And the rest of us, well, we just live here. He is Andrew Walsh, and he is joining me right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. A rare laugh from the intro tape. Good morning, my friend.

Retire them all. That's the one.

Walsh man's world.

Spent eight years looking for the perfect drop for me, and I think you just, I think you found it, Luke.

I remember back when you used to come on the Colgate Hour and say you're famous.

catchphrase walsh man's world well i'm no really donk i have probably heard that i think you should leave sketch that we started the show with i mean at this point i probably heard it 30 times in my life just laughing my ass i know i can my mic muted just dying and it's not even the full the full sketch but it's just we didn't even get in a where be your nutcracker there's something

I got to tell you about gazpacho, Luke. Hey, listen, it's all fun and games. I'm a little distracted today, and I think you're going to be able to feel that throughout the show. My apologies in advance. It is so rare that I do this, Luke. But with your permission, there's something. I actually wrote something that I prepared for the top of the show here because I say a lot of stupid shit on this show a lot. but it's rare that I feel I have to offer like kind of an official public apology and that's kind of where I am today. In fact, this music seems a little bit ridiculous to have going on there. I actually, is this music, I think this music might be more appropriate. This is an open letter I wrote this morning to the Wild Mike's Ultimate Pizza logo. Dear Mr. Ultimate, Dear Sir, as you now know i briefly mentioned your appearance on yesterday's edition of my podcast too beautiful to live with luke burbank quick note of clarification i'm not luke burbank i'm the other guy my name is andrew during our discussion of your delicious you may know him

as this guy walsh man's world this is really tough for me luke i'm just

during your discussion during our discussion of your delicious pizza which is available in the freezer section of my local grocer, I described your physical characteristics in a way that some might find unflattering. There's no need to rehash all the details here, as you and I both know what was said. Suffice it to say, though, there was some comparison to the young man who formerly represented GoDaddy, and I believe an assumption on my part that you sometimes practice your electric bass guitar in your parents' basement. it has come to my attention that the pizza company you represent is owned and operated by the family of longtime tbtl listener and friend of our show ally ives what i am writing today to apologize if any of my words hurt or offended you in any way i would like you to know that i have enjoyed your pizzas on many football watching occasions and i intend to continue doing so with your blessing. Sincerely, Andrew Lewis Walsh, attorney at law. Please say hello to the Papa Peta logo for me. I'm a big fan of his work.

Thank you. Wow!

Thank you for giving me the space there to do that, Luke. I know it's not what we usually do, but I just felt like I had to say something. Is Wild Mike listener Allie's, like, father? I don't know if he sat for the illustration, if that's what you mean. Has Allie

been to any events? Because I feel like I would remember if her face was like a weird cartoon. The thing is, I

know that you know Allie we've hung out with Allie before at like I mean a long time ago at Chateau Saint-Michel picnics she's been a long time listener and friend and I forgot because I haven't been on Facebook in a long time I haven't chatted with Allie in a long time and I forgot we used to talk about her family's pizza business and she even offered us tours of it before which I'd still like a tour of a pizza business but I think they somewhat recently I got a note from her today just saying hey you mentioned that you had brought this up on the show previously and could you tell me when you've brought this up before and i had totally forgotten the pizza connection there and i said oh i don't know when i brought up wild mike before we just bring things up on the show but i hope you're not the designer of the logo and she wrote back no it's my family's pizza company i was like oh this is ally you're the pizza kingpin i totally forgot about this connection altogether so i just wanted to clear the air there um actually she did say or she intimated that it sounds like it was kind of a a redesign somewhat recently and it's actually brought a lot of attention to the company so whether or not you like this show among other

places i mean i say this with absolute peace and love to ali and the entire wild mike's community um it may not be the sort of uh design aesthetic that i would go for but i will tell you this i remember anytime i've seen a box of this they have it at whole foods and so to the degree that we're talking about it and that people i'm sure remember it and that it appears to be delicious pizza right now featuring over two pounds of uh of toppings and and just cheesy uh doughy goodness that's the wild mike's ultimate pizza it's a 100 all-natural no artificial anything coming in at over two pounds um

You know, it's working, I guess is what I'm trying to say. Even if we're a little put off by this drawing, it is definitely accomplishing the goal.

And I just want to remind Allie that I'm not the one who used the word Mount Douche more. I believe that was my co-host, Luke Burbank. That made it into the show. I assumed you would edit that out. No, I didn't razor that. I thought it showed a lot of restraint not making that the show title.

You know, it's funny that you were talking about this idea of this person who will no longer be spoken of in the same sentence as the Wild Mike's Pizza Empire, but this person, this hypothetical person who plays the bass guitar not plugged in to the amp. I, when I went to a Gospel Outreach Christian Fellowship, there was a kid, Sean Stevenson, would sit out on the front porch of the steps and just jam out on an electric guitar that was not plugged in to an amp.

It sounds like clacking. It's that, I mean, I don't know how to describe it, but all you hear, you mostly just hear that metallic snapping of the strings.

My friend, you've never heard Steve Vai Highwire's album until you've heard Sean Stevenson do it unplugged on the steps of Gospel Outreach Christian Fellowship in Briar, Washington.

Oh my gosh. Yeah, what a scene.

Can we also agree that I think it's high time either Allie or Wild Mike himself become a dazzling donor? Because, I mean, come on.

She might be. Okay. Well, step it up, Allie.

You're the scion of a pizza empire. And we often say the dazzling amount of dough that they're donating, well, it would be quite literal in this case.

Yes, exactly. You could actually be a dazzling. We'll create a new category called Dazzling Donors, and you just contribute a whole bunch of literal dough. And also we will accept just pizza

Like if you want to support the show by sending us tons of Wild Mike's Pizza We would absolutely accept that

So anyway, well thank you for again giving me the space there And you know, much love, much love as people say

So you went with the Italian music because we're talking pizza Yeah, I think so I thought maybe you were going to make me an offer I couldn't refuse When I first heard the music I thought maybe your daughter was getting married A wild Mike

Sleeps with the ultimate fishes

You bring me two pounds of pizza On this the day of my I don't do a Marlon Brando I don't know why I went for that What is your opinion on The Godfather movies We've talked about this before And I think what I always say about them is I saw them after The Sopranos And so truthfully I was let down But that I think They're a victim of their own success Is that how you would describe your experience with those films as well?

This is the beginning of the show, so we're not running out of time here. So I'm actually going to tell you my entire experience with this because it's super. I find my relationship to the Godfather films embarrassing. There was a period of my life where I loved them so much that I had the complete guide to the Godfather movies. Why is that embarrassing? You're a 13-year-old kid. You're into this movie. You have a book about them. it's embarrassing because i had the book before i ever watched the movies my dad loved that's as embarrassing as you think it's i'm not even joking well it was like it's here's why it's embarrassing to me so okay so growing up my dad would talk about these movies and how much he absolutely loved them and we also at me and my sister as kids we were not allowed to watch any kind of r-rated movie even pg-13 movies were on the edge are you adding the italian music again yeah as i talk about this so we lived in a household where my dad loved the godfather movies and talked about them all the time but i was not allowed to watch them right so for starters i knew about a lot of the iconic scenes long before i ever saw the movie because my dad is

like spoiling the hell out of them but i also enjoy saying like saying lines from the movie that you understand that they're part of the film, but you haven't actually seen it.

Yes, and there's a really, I think, I don't think he spoiled the toll booth scene. There's a very shocking toll booth scene. But he totally, you know, spoiled like the famous commode scene where a gun is hidden up in the old-fashioned toilet and whatever. So like I knew about these things. But the reason I got the book was because in eighth grade, I fell in with a small band of kids who I really admired. Now, eighth grade was a new school for me. I knew nobody. And all of these kids had spent the last eight years together, and they were now graduating from the school. And I was just there for, like, the final year. And so it was kind of hard to break in. And there were these three guys. I can't remember their names off the top of my head. But they were the ones I really wanted to be friends with. No. Big Pussy. And Marone. Oh, and also, where's the Gabagool was also in the crew.

It was weird. We were in eighth grade, but he had white wings on each side of his head. Pauly Walnuts.

Where be your nutcracker?

Anyway, they called me Pauly Walshnuts.

Now that is a show title that will put Mount Dushmore out of everyone's mind.

But anyway, I really like these guys. I had not really had many friends up to this point, and they were definitely a little bit of a clique, but they were, like, kind of the nerdy cool guys. They were the ones who introduced me to Monty Python. They were the ones who were obsessed with The Godfather, and one of them had the, whatever it was, the complete Godfather book that I then bought, too. They're the ones who introduced me to, like, hair, well, Led Zeppelin. They're the ones who introduced me to Led Zeppelin, and then also they got me into, like, some hair metal stuff. kind of like ACDC and Def Leppard. I think that was kind of the era for that. And on the occasions that I did hang out with them, we would get together and we would record ourselves playing air guitar, lip syncing to those hair bands. Yet somehow these nerds were still kind of, they still had a power amongst them because they had a coolness to them. And of course they knew each other forever. So I was always a little bit on the outside or very much on the outside trying to kind of claw my way into their friendship a bit. So anyway, that is my embarrassing relationship. So by the time I finally saw the movie, my dad had already spoiled a bunch. I already had had the book. I had the fan's guide to the movies before having seen it. And I it was already imbued with this kind of sense of importance and coolness because these guys liked it. And so I just sort of feel like I did not come into it with, like, a real fresh perspective. However, when I watched it, it felt very adult to me because, like you said, the pacing is not Sopranos-esque. So let's say I finally watched it in, I don't know, ninth grade or something or tenth. I have no idea. And the pacing is very slow. But I remember enjoying the challenge of it. It felt like, my gosh, I really have to pay attention to this and forget about the second one. Have you ever seen the second one, Luke? It is complicated and slow, and that one was my favorite, which probably set me up for a lifetime or at least part of a lifetime of enjoying challenging movies.

Isn't it sort of famously one of those movies that people generally say that the sequel, the second one, is better than the original, which is, I think there's kind of a relatively short list of films like that or film series like that?

I do hear that. I believe I would have said that at one point. I don't know if I would still say that today. now if you told me hey why don't you sit down and watch the first two movies like you know me we talk about my attention span on this i don't know i don't know if i would be interested in sitting through them unless they were brought back to a theater where i'm like you know i have to sit there and watch that's why i like going to the theater i think because i'm not gonna like wander into the other room to get a beer or look down at my phone you know i do have a very fond memory by the way because by the time i was old enough to watch the godfather it became kind of a bonding thing with me and my dad and then was it the it was some cleveland art museum did a screening of it in their like little auditorium and i think it was right as i was graduating high school or maybe it was the summer right before going to college and i remember going to watch the first godfather movie in this little auditorium with my dad um and then afterwards this is a weird memory but i remember by like going to walgreens and buying a bunch of stuff from my college dorm that i was moving to soon you know and i just remember that i remember that evening very well and so that's a

fond memory yeah would you say that your relationship with this group of friends as you call them kind of the cool nerds was it a sort of thing where like you were trying to become part of the group but then eventually you tried to leave the group and then they sort of pulled you back into the group was that was that ever a dynamic that played out is that even from the godfather by the way yeah it's from the godfather part is that

whoa yeah they made a number three yes and it was a lot of people said oh somebody made a number three i remember i remember liking it at the time but then i think it i i could be wrong godfather fans get at me but i'm pretty sure that the third one was because a lot of time had gone between number between the second one and the third one and i think it ended up being a letdown you know

i think sofia coppola was in it oh i know she was in one of i remember like just a still photo of her uh you know kind of as a teenager in one of those films so i guess three would make the most

sense yeah yeah and that was the first time i'd heard of sofia coppola and then i remember being excited hearing that she was making movies.

You know, the thing about this, I like this music, but we now are forced to basically offer unlimited breadsticks and salad to the TVTL listeners. When you're here, you're framily. Old Polly Walsh nuts. Did you write that down? I did. I did. It's right now the leading contender for the show title today. All right. Let's take a quick break, and then when we come back, I'm truly excited to read this ad for this dog that needs adopting. I'm actually kind of shocked that it hasn't. Well, have you read the ad yet, Andrew?

No, no. I only heard your description in the intro. I was busy writing an open letter this morning to pay attention to everything else.

I'm both shocked and deeply unsurprised that nobody has adopted this dog named Prancer. So we'll get into that and the Arclight and Drops of Stupider coming up in a moment here on TBTL.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go. Everybody rattle, dazzle.

All right, let's thank some dazzling donors. These are the wonderful, generous people who make the show possible with their dazzling donations. You could say that when they've tried to leave TBTL, we've implored them to please come back to the fold and they've been receptive to that message of course we're talking about people like steve lee of shelton connecticut i sure hope that this is what steve wrote for the pronunciation of his name it is steve rhymes with steve which is apparently a nautical tall ship term for the angle of the bowsprit remember Remember when I was living in Port Townsend and I was totally confused about that sandwich joint? I was calling it the Owl Spirit. I don't remember. And somebody had to nicely clarify that it's the Owl Sprit, which is a particular kind of like sail or mast. Oh. Not unlike the Bow Sprit.

Oh, I don't remember that at all. But it was an embarrassing moment for you, not me. So that's probably why it stuck with you.

That's why you – although I think actually you'd treasure that.

No.

An embarrassing moment for me.

Is that really my vibe? Is that really what you think of me?

A little bit. No. Steve, which rhymes with Steve, would like to use his time as a Dazzling Donor to suggest that we play what I've not listened to this, but he wrote this version of the worst Christmas song ever perfectly captures the joy of listening to TBTL. So I'm not exactly sure what we're going to hear, and I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to feel about it. This, on the day of my daughter's wedding, that Steve, rhymes with Steve, would come to me and play the worst Christmas song ever. But, Andrew, can we hear it?

Yeah, let's stick with this for a while, because at first I think you'll say, oh, I've heard this a million times. And then as it goes on, you might realize, oh, yeah, this is a slightly different version than what we've heard. In fact, we might have played this on the show before. I don't know.

This morning, got some gabagool. The mood is right. The spirit's up. We're here tonight. And that's enough. Simply having a wonderful time. Simply having a wonderful time The party's on The feeling's here Simply having a wonderful time

Oh man, this is like, you know, the thing we were talking about yesterday When you like cut the pie slightly off center This is just aurally very frustrating

Children sing their song

ouch did they cut the kids out or does that come back in a minute i don't know how they did any of this why am i furious

We're simply having a wonderful time Simply having a wonderful time The word is out About the town

I don't know the original I dare you to put this on a summer playlist I know, I love

Like people over on the roof Socially, safely distanced You're just like, what do you mean? Why would you call this a Christmas song? it's just aren't we having a wonderful time are we not having a wonderful time right now are you not having a wonderful time uh anyway i don't remember have you intense does that ring any bells for you hey jingle bells but um does that because i swear i've heard that version before now that i think about it but i don't remember if it was a topic on this show or not i you know like i have a teeny

tiny memory of just seeing it online i don't have a memory of it being something we talked about on the show yeah because i think i'd remember how angry i feel right now if it had already happened once well steve it was your dime and uh and that's how you chose to use it and we well we sure appreciate you supporting the show absolutely and um you know i'll never get that song out of my head wonderful uh unless you know the best thing to get that song out of your head is this song maestro on your mark on your mark get set i half expected you to play paul mccartney i was you know

What I actually thought As I was hitting that button I was wishing that I had played Like some Italian Godfather music there But Oh well

Travis Spokes deserves The proper Dazzling donor music Oh yeah Because Travis is a long time Friend of the program Checking in from Beautiful White Plains, New York Which came to my awareness Andrew When JetBlue I believe started flying from the east coast to the west coast or i might was it jet blue i believe that jet blue flew into white plains new york and that was like a big deal for the company like when they added that well what i remember was we were doing ads and you know what i'm wondering if i'm confusing jet blue with another like budget carrier in fact you know what i think i'm actually Because I think JetBlue used to fly into West Islip or something. But basically, like, there was some discount airline that flew into White Plains, New York. And they were doing ads on the conservative talk radio station I worked at. And it was a real, I mean this literally, fly-by-night operation, Andrew. Because I remember them saying, oh, anybody at the station wants free tickets, you can just, like, have them. And I was thinking, what could I do in White Plains? Like, I wanted to fly from Seattle to White. And I don't even know if they took off from Seattle. It might have been, like, they took off from Chehalis and flew to White Plains. And I remember that airline, it couldn't have been JetBlue because it went out of business. Like, shortly after they were doing ads on the station. Like, it was one of those things where I think some of the planes had, like, one wing.

They went in circles. Just wider and wider circles until you got to where you were going.

Put them way behind schedule. Yeah. Anyway, Travis is over there in White Plains. And Travis sends this message along Hey friendos It is my first time as a dazzling donor So I'll keep it simple Have you heard the most annoying Paul McCartney song of all time? Remix, baby God, I wish I had an air horn Travis says I want to start by saying thanks to both of you For helping keep us all somewhat sane Through the mess that was 2020 I hope you and yours are staying safe and healthy I would like to use my time to encourage my fellow 10s to contribute to their local food banks if they're able. What a nice message, Travis, and an important thing to think about. Food insecurity can be incredibly stressful and your contributions can help families get the nutritious meals they need to make it through these tough times. I would also like to make a request for a song to go out with. It's called Pullin' Punches and it's by Arkells. It's one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite Canadian bands. Thanks again to you and the amazing community surrounding this show I don't really have a power out, so power out Well, thank you, Travis And that's a great reminder to do what you can to help with food insecurity Now, I don't want to take this very nice message from Travis Who's being so generous to the show And talking about food insecurity And take it to anything less than a supportive place But I know we were both watching the baseball game yesterday, Andrew And I don't know if you happened to catch the commercial, which I was just trying to kind of wrap my mind around it, where a young person is talking about food insecurity, somebody who presents sort of as a young woman. And but the voice There's like 10 voices and then at some point The young again presenting As a young woman Says I'm a composite Of the X number of people X number Of kids who suffer from food

Insecurity I have not seen this Commercial so in other words their voice kind of Changed as they talked It's just kind of like they're talking

But there's like it's not just one person's voice It's multiple it's sort of like imagine There's just I don't know 10 People talking at once but you're only seeing One person oh so they're moving their mouth

Over top of each other It's not like the audio version of Black or White by Michael Jackson, which is, you know, just top of mind example for anybody to go to, where one voice replaces the next replaces the next.

I think of it more as a Heavy D song, but okay.

Oh, did Heavy D remix?

No, wait. I always think Heavy D does the rap in that, and that's not true. No. I think it's a not particularly famous person. I think Heavy D. We did a whole thing on that. Remember, wasn't it? Is he in Remember the Time? Was Heavy D in the Remember the Time song?

i don't know but hold on a second now my head really hurts and i'm taking this in a really weird place but who was you read i think it was from your beloved mel magazine there was a producer who did a famous rap on a song and it was the only rap they ever did does this ring a bell to

you was that the michael jackson yes it's exactly andrew i feel like you're having A real good memory week, my friend Because you are 100% right Is that it? Yeah, you're absolutely right It was a kind of Yeah, I think it was the producer of the song I want to say that person might have been From Germany or something Just kind of like Not somebody who was known for Particularly for their rap skills But happened to write that rap And yeah, there was a whole story about it You're absolutely right

John Vice, yes. The man credited only as LTB never recorded another bar after being featured on one of the most popular songs of the 90s. This is a story from Vice. Meet the Mystery Man.

Well, this commercial, it was interesting because basically I was watching what I thought was. I mean, I guess credit to them for just the computer skills. I was watching what I thought was a 15-year-old young woman, and it turned out she was a computer program. And also her face was a composite of X number of children who suffer from food insecurity. I did not. I did not see that. I bet you if you keep watching, you'll see that commercial and you'll see. Did you at least see the one that I hate where the hood ornament sings? You've got the moves. Let's make lots of money or whatever it is.

I think that's Pet Shop Boys. You've got I've got the brains. You've got the looks. Let's make lots of money. By the way, a listener wrote in to defend that song and said, just remember that was a that's one of those songs that's from the it's making fun of somebody who thinks that way. It's a song about perspective there. But that doesn't really get to the issues of the commercial itself, which I saw. And now keep in mind, I saw this commercial after you described it. So I'm expecting to see something that's just really terrible and offends my sensibilities. I didn't think it was as bad as as you described it. However, here's what ticks me off. I believe it was for Allstate. and it was a commercial that was weird just for the sake of being weird which you know i know a lot of companies are playing in that space now but it's like not all the insurance companies have to out weird each other you know when geico was doing it and skittles was doing it it was interesting but then progressive or no it's not progressive has the funny commercials with flow they have a whole bunch of uh different campaigns going on but then what liberty starts to get weird to two liberty was always doing straightforward hey trust us with your with your money and property commercials but then they started to get really weird out in front of the statue of liberty like with the biker with the huge calves and you're like wow all of these the guy in the witness

protection program like jumps into like the like the whatever it's called i don't know new york

harbor and then liberty biberty i actually liked but anyway but then you have all state which has been for the most part pretty straightforward you have um the actor whose name i can't think of and i think it always irritates the listeners when i forget his name i always think of him as america's first black president because he played the president in the tv show 24 um he's been a spokesperson for a long time pretty like you know steady eddie style commercials but now i don't know

that guy's name either but i can tell you that when i worked at npr in la he came in to do some kind of interview and i don't think i've ever seen a more like physically handsome structurally symmetrical well put together person than that dude whatever his name is um let's see it was

his name david palmer in the show this is driving me because i believe he might also be in a famous action movie as well as getting a bunch of emails well wasn't he in uh 24 that's what you're referencing he was the president in 24 exactly yeah 24 season one president why am i even doing this what are we talking about again oh i didn't think that the um uh dennis haisbert this just came up on the show recently dennis haisbert is his name um but anyway i didn't i don't totally hate that commercial i certainly don't love it it doesn't stand out to me but then at the end when i realized what it's for i'm just like can't we just have one goddamn insurance company that just does like straightforward commercials about protecting our interests well i think part of why

the commercial didn't seem so bad to you is because a i definitely over emphasized how bad it was and It's just kind of another forgettable.

commercial and also what i've noticed is there's a much shorter version it's like a 15 second version oh that might now plays during the baseball games and it is way less bad there's also a 30 there might even be a one minute where the the hood ornament really goes for it and i find the whole thing to be very uncanny um can i andrew play one quick thing for you i'm sorry that i'm just doing this uh i don't know if this is going to work as as audio but i mentioned this to you we were talking uh making some uh you know some plans for the show and for the upcoming tb telethon yesterday as we were both also watching the baseball game muted and i said have you seen these northern quest commercials and this is a whole thing i i really think that you could get a a solid episode of after these messages out of it so northern quest is a like a you know casino in in the spokane washington area and there is this there are this series of commercials and they're i'm at the website right now they're called the couple it started as a single commercial about a guy who forgets his anniversary seven years and nearly 40 spots later it's been dubbed spokane's very own sitcom and i have to tell you again i'm just kind of grabbing one at random so you know it may or may not uh really pay off but this husband and wife are very funny take a listen oh by the way they're looking at their i think like a photo album and they got a couple glasses of wine and they're kind of reminiscing i think about their wedding day

oh look here we are on our honeymoon our honeymoon lander wyoming jackalope capital of the world i'll never forget your face when you unwrap those bus tickets tears of joy pure unbridled

anyway sorry kind of like then the casino commercial I mean honestly like that's great commercials are legitimately very good the dynamic between these two actors and the writing or I don't know maybe it's improv I don't think that really like fully uh was demonstrating it but would recommend checking these northern quest commercials

out he reminds me i was watching a long forget your face that's a really good jackalope capital of the world no i'm you had mentioned that yesterday i had no idea what you were talking about no that's actually really good and he reminds me about does he have a tobolowski vibe Like, who does he remind you of? Oh, majorly.

Good call. Yeah, okay, good. I'm also very, like, gratified or very sort of happy that those are created in Spokane, Washington, and are specifically for that casino. Because sometimes you'll see, like, a sort of a TV ad that's a little better than it needs to be for some sort of local outfit. And then you realize, oh, it's a national thing that they just will, you know, sell to people that do whatever that thing is. So I wondered if that's what these were. But no, they appear to be, you know, created right there in old Spokane, Washington. So tip of the cap to those folks. Those commercials are pretty awesome.

You know, I see I'm now I'm scrolling through all their commercials. So there's a whole series of this couple sitting on the couch. I should be quiet in case Genevieve can overhear me talking about commercials on TV. But I see there's one. If you scroll down, Luke, to February, there's one called the Porsche payout. And our main character, our hero here, he's been pulled over. And I kept almost seeing this commercial, if that makes sense, or thinking I'd almost seen it because I kept thinking I don't get it. I kept thinking I got to go back and figure out what happens in this commercial because he gets pulled over. If I have this right, we see that he's in a car. He's been pulled over by a police officer, but I think he knows the police officer. Have you seen this one? I don't think I actually have. Could you play it? Yeah, let's see what happens here because I hope I'm thinking of the right one here. Well, if it isn't Mario.

Look, can we cut to the chase here? Halftime's over. My friends are devouring all of the hot wings as we speak. So if you could get your little pad out and wrap this up, please. Pad. Pad. Who's got the pad? Oh, I see what you're doing. That's funny.

I don't see what he was doing. The cop starts, like, touching all of his pockets looking for the pad of paper. Do you get the joke there?

I don't get the joke I think that we I feel like you know there's some kind of magic with that couple maybe we need to keep keep that the universe wherein these commercials exist generally

like but that isn't like I don't I don't think like oh that's a bad joke I feel like I don't get that joke like maybe it's a bad joke but I don't get the maybe the cop is just like I get the impression that they're friends because there's another one where I swear they mention something about like knowing each other like Like, oh, it's you again or something. And so maybe there's a series where the cop keeps on punking him and then, like, kind of stretching out the inevitable by pretending he doesn't have his ticket pad. Anyway, I've given that too much time. Sorry.

You know, I once shot a TV commercial in Spokane. I think it was the first commercial where I ever had any dialogue. And I've talked about this before. It was the commercial where I sweated through two different blazers. Through a blazer. Wow. that the character thank you um it was uh for a golf pride golf grips and i was like a a sort of a espn sports center meets a kind of johnny carson type okay and i'm interviewing a very kind of taciturn golfer and i'm asking them like what their secret is to you know shaving shots off of their game and and the guy says i regret my clubs with with golf pride And then I like the joke is That it's a bad interview because I didn't have any follow up questions I thought this was going to go a lot longer By the way it was foreshadowing for my actual career in the media None of us could have known it then But it was crazy stressful Because it had to be exactly 28 seconds long if I remember right And so it was like You know action and then Me and this other actor this guy named Scott Burns Actually who was a long time Seattle radio dude We had to do this whole thing With this like awkward thing Where I kind of spike the camera And I've got these like cue cards I'm holding Or like those little blue cards like Letterman would have And all has to happen in exactly 28 seconds And I kept messing it up

It's a single shot thing huh

No cutaways, no edits It all had to happen in one shot And I was Absolutely overwhelmed Because I had never I'd been in one other TV commercial That beer commercial Where I didn't have any lines And even that, I almost botched. I was supposed to pretend to look at the northern lights, and I was so nervous, my face involuntarily spasmed.

And you looked at the southern lights.

God, I know. What a dingus. But the – so this was like – that was the only other thing I'd ever done. But I just remember them flying me to Spokane, which felt like very sort of important to me. And then a car picked me up, like an Uber type of – like a black town car picked me up from the airport and drove me to the soundstage where we shot this Golf Pride commercial. And I felt like I was really hitting the big time

You said you sweat through two sport coats So did you have two identical sport coats that wardrobe provided? Did you just put your own sport coats? Okay, so they were both identical They were identical

And there was a wardrobe person there And I remember after I sweated through the second one I remember looking over and realizing She was trying to blow dry out the sweat stains from the first one Which made you sweat more in the second one. And it was after that I started using that terrible, terrible, you know, antiperspirant that's, you know, probably going to be the death of me, the CertainDry, which is, you know, whatever the bad chemical is that most deodorant is like 1% of, it's 99% of that.

I just recently got myself a new bottle of that, and I've been using it again. I think I've told you this off air. I don't know what's happened to me. what's hap did I say what's hap of me what did I just say you said what's happening to me is that what I said okay well mouth works brain doesn't um but I don't know what's going on with me but in the past year or so I found myself like really sweating profusely during like kind of I guess you would call it almost like flop sweat but only under my arms and like but a nervousness kind of thing like you know when I used to be able to go to the gym I liked sweating I would work up a good sweat there um but it was unusual that i would just like i would record an episode of tbtl and have to change my t-shirt like i was sweating so much and this is my daily job an episode any podcast recording afterwards i had to change my t-shirt if i was on a zoom call that i found stressful i i would just be sweating profusely so i went back to our old friend certain dry couldn't find it in any store around here had to order it on the dark web um and i've been using every order on the dry web oh my god yes and what you know they always say only use it at night right you're supposed to think they're like this is powerful stuff can i just say to the to the

listeners and the children of america this is not an ad for certain drive i cannot i cannot advocate for this product uh lightly enough is gotta be terrible for you i don't think it's good don't

we even have i'll play it tomorrow i think we have a bob's burgers joke that relates to getting this kind of deodorant on the dark web um and it it has worked i use it i put it on every other night right as i go to sleep and they're very clear

Like right below the skull and crossbones on the label, it says only wear at night. And I didn't really know why that was. And when I got this second, because I used this on your recommendation, I'm going to say maybe seven years ago or something, and then didn't need any more or ran out or what have you.

This was shortly after you'd written me into your life insurance policy and I was trying to get rid of you.

You were singing, You've Got the Brains, I've Got the Looks, Let's Make Lots of Money. I was driving a Bentley or a Jaguar or whatever that thing is. Anyway, so I got it again recently, and I'd kind of forgotten why you're only supposed to wear it at night. So I had – or like as you're sleeping. So I had taken like kind of an evening shower, and I'm like, oh, okay, well, I'll just put this on now. But I was still going to be awake for four or five hours or whatever, just hanging around. And it burned so bad. I think you're only supposed to wear it at night so you don't feel the burning. You ever wear that stuff while you're awake?

Well, I mean, you know what it actually does? You used the term deodorant, but it's very much not a deodorant. It's very much an antiperspirant. And it shrinks your pores.

Yeah, it's not a deodorant.

So you put it on the night before because it needs all night to do its devilish work on your pores. Like, you wake up in the morning and you're just like, God, why are my ears sweating?

I know, it doesn't happen. Because your body is like, we don't know.

The sweat has nowhere else to go. You start talking and sweat is pouring out of your mouth.

I got a little crying tears of onions a little hose that's developing in the back of my neck

and that is when you were supposed to you see the warning on the label I just have to open that thing up like a spit if that hose lasts for more than four hours you need to see a doctor immediately I'm gonna tell you about this um ad for this this dog named Prancer A woman in Morris Plains, New Jersey Named Tiffany Fortuna Put an ad up for this dog, Prancer That she has been fostering And I will send you the picture in a minute, Andrew Because it is The picture of Prancer really seals the deal But let me just If you'll allow it I just want to read this She put this on Twitter, I believe And on Facebook, I think Okay, I've tried I've tried for the last several months to post this dog for adoption and make him sound palatable. The problem is, he's just not. There's not a very big market for neurotic, man-hating, animal-hating, children-hating dogs that look like gremlins. But I have to believe there's someone out there for Prancer, because I am tired, and so is my family. Every day we live in the grips of the demonic Chihuahua hellscape he has created in our home. If you own a Chihuahua, you probably know what I'm talking about. He's literally the chihuahua meme that describes them as being 50% hate and 50% tremble. If you're intrigued and horrified at how this animal sounds already, just wait. There's more. Prancer came to me obese, wearing a cashmere sweater with a bacon, egg, and cheese stuffed in his crate with him. I should have known in that moment this dog would be a problem. He was owned by an elderly woman who treated him like a human and never socialized him. Sprinkle in a little genetic predisposition For being nervous And you've concocted a neurotic mess A.K.A. Prancer His first week he was too terrified To have a personality As awful as it sounds I kind of liked him better that way He was quiet and just laid on the couch He didn't bother anyone I was excited to see him come out of his shell And become a real dog I am convinced at this point He is not a real dog But more like a vessel For a traumatized Victorian child that now haunts our home that's page one by the way prancer only likes women nothing else he hates men more than women do which says a lot if you have a husband don't bother applying unless you hate him prancer prancer has lived with a man for six months and has still not accepted him he bond to he bonds to a woman or women and takes his job of protection seriously he offers better protection than capital security this also extends to other animals have other dogs cats don't apply unless they like being shaken like a rag doll by a 13 pound rage machine this may be confusing to

people as he currently lives with my other seven dogs and 12 cats that's because we have somewhat come to an agreement that it's wrong to attack the other animals but you know that episode of the office where michael scott silently whispers i'll kill you to toby that's prancer having to begrudgingly coexist with everyone when I'm around. We also mentioned no kids for Prancer. I think at this point you can imagine why. He's never been in the presence of a child, but I can already imagine the demonic noises and shaking fury.

that would erupt from his body if he was prancer wants to be your only child now we're at the last page here uh so what are his good traits he is loyal beyond belief although to tell you a secret his complex is really just a facade for his fear if someone tried to kill you i can guarantee he would run away screeching but as far as companionship you'll never be alone again he likes to go for car rides he is housebroken he knows a few basic commands he's quiet and non-destructive when left alone at home and even though we call him baloney face he is kind of cute to look at he also quote smiles when he's excited his ideal home would be with a single woman a mother and daughter or a lesbian couple you can't live in an apartment or condo unless you want him to ankle bite your neighbors we already addressed the men and children situation if you have people over he would have to be put away like he's a vacuum i know finding someone who wants a chucky doll And a dog's body is hard, but I have to try Prancer is available Through Second Chance Pet Adoption League He's in New Jersey, but can be adopted anywhere In the tri-state area If you've always wanted your own haunted Victorian child In the body of a small dog that hates men and children Please email me Oh, also, he's only two years old And will probably live to be 21 through pure spite So take that into account if you're interested I am weirdly surprised This dog is not adopted yet Even though that sounds like a real you know kind of tall order taking care of it it also just seems like you know the way people are like you know uh it's sort of like you know you can fix him right don't you think uh people someone's

gonna adopt this dog well now that it's like a viral thing and there's a story behind it sure assuming i mean this is real right like i'm remembering that story i read about the beans about a boyfriend having an argument with his girlfriend about beans a while back and like i was really into it and then i got to the end and you were like bean dad

oh you mean gorilla glue girl it was a really charming oh you mean shrimp shrimp cereal dad

shrimp dad um no i don't know if you recall i read this thing and it was similar it was kind of similar to this was like one of those reddit things like am i i think it was like the am i the asshole here and it was argument about beans and then we got to the end and you were just like doesn't pass the smell test and i was like oh yeah now that you say that now i'm looking at this i was along for the ride the seven dogs and 12 cats i was like i believe that this is a person who

doesn't sound like they have you know human children and they're fostering a dog already so like that to me actually does seem like it's possible it's possible and i will say that so

that's where i was like oh when you said seven dogs and 12 cats i was like oh this is this is baloney baloney face um but then i gotta say i'm you know i'm following along i found this on facebook now and the fact that there's a real link to the second chance a pet adoption league and a supposedly real email address here um maybe all signs point to this being real i just wanted to throw that out there because what did we just well somebody told you once recently to start not

believing everything again i think it really that that really lodged itself in your brain oh that

was volkswagen's lie oh yeah yeah anyway no that's probably real i don't know and yeah i'm sure somebody i mean that's kind of the thing though i mean do you want a dog or do you want to be internet famous and i think probably a lot of people want to be internet famous so they'll get

this dog and then i don't know oh i think there are people out i mean there are some really really good people in the world that really like take animal you know adoption and rescue seriously i mean even i and this is probably just because of like my you know my sadness around not getting to live with rudy uh right now i was like can i fix prancer and then i i realized that's a terrible idea like but i really did have this moment of thinking like well maybe somebody just needs to just love prancer through it you know just like if you could just if you could just connect with this dog and make this dog feel safe and and okay maybe this whole you know amazing personality would come out um but then uh you know i also thought i'd probably get tired of this situation

after about four days yeah yeah i don't think that you're the right person for this no offense

Oh, wow. Okay, well, I am adopting the dog now.

Okay, good. Well, there's content for you.

The Arclight is closing in L.A., and I actually didn't realize this, but there are a few other Arclights now kind of around the country. The kind of marquee location in the first one is on Sunset, and it has a – it's in a sort of movie theater that had kind of a Cinerama-style huge screen.

It's the original Cinerama.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Cool. Yeah, there's a little mirrored one, like Cinerama, that big dome in L.A., I believe was the first one. It's like a geodesic dome, and then they built a smaller version here in Seattle and maybe a couple of other places.

Which has, I guess, coincidentally also gone out of business. The Cinerama in Seattle, I mean, is currently not—I mean, the pandemic is doing a number on it, but you know what I mean? Like, it's allegedly not coming back. I am hoping that Arclight— 8. uh comes back um and that's as does cinerama in seattle i think they're i mean i'm reading this article in variety uh that somebody named steve cone i believe wrote and um they're saying at the end of the piece that the kind of consensus is that somebody will probably step in or maybe even the city of los angeles like it should be some kind of historical like landmark in la i I mean, you're in forget Grauman's Chinese theater like ain't nobody got time for that noise with a bunch of weird Elmos and minions standing out in front of it harassing people. You know, people are just trying to, I guess, make a living. But Arclight is the to me is the like primo L.A. theater.

Yeah. And so there's the dome that's been around since. Actually, did you just say I can't remember when the dome first opened? Was it the 1940s, maybe? But then Arclight is the company that, you know, owned and operated it so long as I've known it. And, you know, they built a building around it or there's a building around it that has, you know, it's a multiplex now with a whole bunch of screens. And like, you know, a lot of my days in Los Angeles, I've been talking to a lot of people about this. Like a lot of my days in Los Angeles were very, I don't know, stressful and dark in some ways. I went through a really tough time there. And this little stretch of sunset was really my little slice of heaven. like vives and i saw so many movies in la it was like part of our weekend ritual sometimes we'd see two in a day um and of course i'd love going to amoeba records kill some time and then go to the arc light and watch yeah i think amoeba still exists i think they just moved out of out of their iconical building or they were going to covet might have slowed that but again like that experience is definitely going away um as i knew it and then this this arc light closing down and And I think the company that ran Arclight actually has something like 300 theaters around the country now. Oh, wow. I think I read that yesterday. And it's sad across the board because that's a relatively small chain when you think about the giants that are out there. And going to the Arclight was special, whether it was in the actual dome where I saw the Mad Max, Fury Road. Like, that's the perfect movie to see on that huge dome screen. But even just in the multiplexes, it always felt special to me. um there are a lot of old photos around um that would show you like the early days of like premieres go like movie premieres going back decades and decades and seeing the the glitz of hollywood and it just made you feel like you were somewhere special and you were somewhere special and this is like unrelated to movies but my last point on this about how much i loved this little part of la there was a 20 i don't know if i told you this luke but there was a 24 hour fitness that was very it might have even been part of the same complex it was off of the same parking garage and one of my favorite things to do this was not the 24-hour fitness that was closest to me or the most convenient but sometimes when I had some extra time especially on like kind of an maybe a late Friday afternoon or early Friday evening I loved going to this 24-hour fitness and getting on one of the elliptical machines that was right in a window on the second floor overlooking the entrance to the arc light not the dome but like the the multiplex entrance and i just love it i just i am filled with a feeling i can't describe of being on that machine and people watching i love people watching i love going to the movies and i used to love being on that elliptical just watching the crowds kind of come and go as you could tell when certain movies were you know letting out and we're about to start right and i would just people watch and see all the people having their little whatever mini dramas below or coming out of the theater everybody's talking and you know they're all talking about the movie they just saw it just

was a feeling that I can't describe that was really special to me I mean literally my favorite workout machine in all of the world is an elliptical machine in the window of 24 hour fitness overlooking the arc light so I really really hope somebody at least saves this complex I think they will somebody will have to save at least this theater I mean it is the you know it's

It's a sort of town industry, right? I used to go to the YMCA that was not far from that arc light that was also on Sunset, I believe. It actually may have been on Santa Monica, but it was in that general area. And it was funny because I would play pickup basketball there a lot. And I didn't realize it, but all of the dudes I played basketball with were aspiring actors. And to this day, I see them in commercials. Oh, OJ.

Right.

Oh, cool. Oh, that's that's that one dude that that used to, like, back me down in the paint. And now he's in a, you know, Home Depot ad selling like it's all of the guys from the pickup basketball game at the YMCA in Hollywood. On the subject of movie theaters, by the way, I don't know if we mentioned this on the show already. I definitely was talking about it in real life. There is a 99 percent invisible episode that is out currently that is about the rise of the multiplex or the megaplex. Oh, yeah.

And it is fascinating because it's not I mean, it's not only is just an interesting story about a change in the industry of, you know, basically there became this point where if you weren't a movie theater with stadiums style seats, you just were like out of business. But also the way that it actually drove filmmaking. I think they were talking about I want to say it was 1999. The list of films that came out in 1999 is just mind blowing. And these were movies like Being John Malkovich that were playing on like thousands of screens across America, even though they were like kind of offbeat films. There was this – people need to just listen to the real episode to get the actual description of things. But basically they got to this point where they had a bunch of screens and they needed movies to put on the screens. And it created this bizarre like five-year window where studios were just making super good movies. And then eventually that ended And now everything is just the Fast and the Furious You know Car being driven by Kung Fu Panda Or whatever but there was this And again you know Roman Mars and the Other reporter and producer did a really good job of Describing it and explaining why but there Was this kind of like it basically Drove creative filmmaking for a while Because of the need for films because they

Had all these screens that's interesting I'm Always obsessed with usually In a musical sense like how how physical changes to media or a medium changes the art behind it somebody just sent me a New York Times interactive piece on this too because once again we're seeing the type of music that's being produced change based on how people are consuming it like going back a long time like and I don't remember the details on this I remember reading about this in college and kind of having a bit of an obsession with this I always thought this would be like my this would be like my grad school paper if i were to ever um write one would be like how does the physical manifestation of media the things that we listen to our music off of how does that affect the artistic output and going back a certain ways like jazz jazz standards tended to be a certain length because of the records that they were recorded oh sure and when that changed well then that changed the artistic process as well and then of course you go through just the idea of making an album like during the era of really thinking about things not as a collection of songs but albums i think that's predominantly like late 60s and the 1970s artists start doing that and they have to think about the narrative arc or the musical arc over the course of a side a and then a side b right and then when cds come along and you get rid of the side a and the side b well then that potentially changes the flow and how you're going to arrange these songs and how you might even write these songs, you know? And then it goes on and on and on, and streaming totally changes that. And now TikTok, I think, is really the big thing that, again, the medium is changing the artistic process. And what you're describing with movies, I hadn't really thought of that before, but, like, it's a little bit different. It's a little bit of a marketplace thing. Like, what can the market bear and what does it need? But it's kind of similar, right? It's about what is being made based on how it's going to be shown.

these are films that came out in 1999 if you'll just permit me uh fight club magnolia american beauty um the matrix uh star wars episode one phantom menace 10 things i hate about you eyes wide shut office space uh south park bigger longer and uncut the can i'll be great boys don't cry Election The Blair Witch Project The Sixth Sense The Virgin Suicides The Iron Giant American Pie Galaxy Quest Cruel Intentions Being John Malkovich Notting Hill The Talented Mr. Ripley And a bunch of others It was a real Pretty blockbuster year For a lot of pretty good filmmaking

Yeah and also a wide range of types of things Popcorn movies to the more arty ones Can't believe that Sofia Coppola is coming up twice in the same show. That was her debut, right? Virgin Suicides. Wasn't that her directorial debut? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was – and that's my kind of – that's really my era of, like, so many of those. Like, Magnolia – I don't know that Magnolia holds up to the incredibly high standards at which I once held it. Like, that was my favorite movie for a while. Now, I think maybe it's a little scenery, chewy for my tastes at times, but like the opening 10 minutes of Magnolia with that Amy Mann song just weaved in between as they set. And then and then those little vignettes, the weird vignettes that set the tone of the movie. I mean, that is some of my just like the first again. What is it? 10, 15 minutes. That movie is some of them.

my favorite filmmaking i am trying to remember which pt anderson movie i actually saw at arc light it was it might have no i didn't live there in 99 i was still living in seattle there was some pt anderson movie i believe or maybe it was tarantino it was one of those real like kind of prestige films and me and my buddy cotter went to the arc light and whoever the filmmaker was was there that's how you knew the arc light was a big deal because like if you went to the movie and it was like a tarantino film there's a decent chance tarantino was just wandering the lobby trying to get a read on how people are reacting to the movie which of course geeked us out pretty hard you know what that's right you know what i saw in the dome

was tarantino's um the the western that actually had an intermission it wasn't jango the hateful eight the hateful eight yeah i saw that in the and that was a perfect place to see a movie like that by the way i'm not the biggest fan of that movie at the end of the day not that anybody asked me but like if you're going to watch a huge epic that you know in the 2000s and the what was that the 2017 or whatever that actually has an intermission built in like that's the type of movie you're seeing that's a good movie to see in the dome absolutely and and i'm with you like

there were long stretches of that movie that i was kind of like felt it kind of dragged for me but that's like sort of every Tarantino film for me but the fact that Bridget Fonda learned how to play guitar as Daisy Domergue to do that song at the end like she literally had to learn how to play that song and play guitar that alone to me justifies the entire film it's like such a great weird scene I don't know if I knew that yeah I read that somewhere that's just absolute stupid all right it's time for another round of drops of stupider the deuce this is day six of our attempt to figure out the most memorable moment in tbtl history uh what are we going to hear today andrew all right

so uh moving on here and i don't understand why this is no longer my notes why didn't you tell me this was coming up sorry i have a cutting and paste issue here but coming up today we have a number two seed versus a number seven seed the number two seed is cat rolling this is something that came up again the the overarching kind of theme for this category is recurring segments and there was a time there where you and then the listeners found various ways to cat roll me which was to surprise me by playing the Game of Thrones theme song sung by a cat or that's the best way I can describe it here and you started doing this thing where you would set up a piece of tape for me and then instead of playing the piece of tape you would play that song and it was quite the spoof that went back to 2014 and that is up against the number seven seed TBTL drops let them roll this is something that has come up on the show from time to time but i found the very first instance of it way back in 2012 luke i was a mere i was a mere tbtl babe at this point not a babe although we should do a tbtl babes calendar

uh-huh you we alternate months i want to be mr march because i have a sexy leprechaun outfit

that is gonna rock like that world i want to be june because i want to be the flag day hottie um anyway uh so i way back in june of 2012 i think we must have been at were we recording at cairo radio or maybe in your um your studio there in your home in mount baker i don't remember we were in the middle of something and we were on like tangent number four of a story and then you played a drop sound like us and then i think another drop accidentally played right after it And you said, well, let's just do this. Let's just play a bunch of drops. And I think we've done that maybe a few times since, and it's a fave of the listener. So which would you like to start with, Luke? I have some audio examples of both of those. Let's start with the let the drops, you know, let it roll. OK, sounds good. So this goes back to 2012. Take a listen to this.

Should we just play a game called just let a few drops just roll and just see what happens? Sure. OK, here we go. Blurk. Yes.

this is why i can't have nice things i'll say i'll say what's up dog you know what i'm just gonna say it let's get physical drunk people are so mellow i don't want to deprecate the feelings here you want showmanship you got it california got sunshine here's my sweet stash let's freaking party that's just what happens when you just hit i loved every one of those that was radio gold Oh, well, let's do it again.

Lake chargogogogmatchogogogshalboonagongamog.

I keep losing at deals, and I don't want to make a deal anymore. He just jumped right up in videos.

a lick. Captain Crunch stays crunchy, even in milk. What about macaroni? Let me finish. Salad.

Oh, ma, pa, it's just beautiful.

I think it's a mating call of the sow-bellied nargleweed.

Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder?

Do I smell a new favorite segment?

Yes.

It's just called TBTL Drops. Let them roll! I know what sex means and is. I know about the clubs and drugs. Anyway, I find it odd that you're not playing the best drop ever of all time. And I know your personal favorite.

Are you taking my duplication investigation seriously? Or are you disrespecting my duplication investigation?

I don't understand why you're... Your biggest regret of working with me is that I like that drop.

Come on, son! I like to think that you've come around on the duplication investigation. I requested

it the other day. I also never know. I'm loving this, by the way, but I'm never sure. It's very unclear to me when we're playing the tape and when you're reacting to the tape or when you're on tape reacting to what happened. So I'm always playing this applause at the wrong time. I apologize.

No problem. Same with you, too, because I think you and I are both laughing over top of it. I'll move my mic from now. Okay, so that was TBTL Drops, Let Item roll, the inaugural segment, which I think we brought back somewhat recently.

It's quite remarkable to me how many of those drops were played today, Andrew. It's called the freaking day.

It's called the Sofia Coppola effect. Okay, and now let's get to a cat roll. This is not the very first time you cat rolled me. My response on that was less satisfying, so I will play this. This is the second time you cat rolled me. this is from august 6th 2014 take a listen to this i'll mute my mic so that you so you won't

hear me i think the listeners yeah you're right i generally i think the listeners enjoy hearing us react but i think it's too confusing because we're also reacting on the tape so i'll mute my

mic as well me too and if you want if you want a sense of how long this is this is one minute and 10 seconds if you want to get that applause ready here we go actually do you know what that's

a real thing i have this other uh thing which is dr pepper schwartz from the university of do you know there's a thing called familial sexual attraction that is happens in these cases where people meet each other and they are attracted to each other for a reason that they think is because they have chemistry but it's because they're related this is pepper schwartz

I fucking hate you. I hate you so much. I was even going to say when you started playing the Portuguese tape, I was almost going to jump on top and say, I'm just glad to hear it's not Game of Thrones or Game of Cats. And then I let down my guard. I'm trying to figure out how I can wedge a V.C. Andrews joke into this thing. Oh, flowers in the attic. Nice. And then suddenly, all of a sudden, I'm listening to the cats. And that's the problem right there, first of all, of me trying to think of jokes in advance as I'm not paying attention and I get catrolled.

You did.

There you go, Luke. Oh, man.

Still holds up. I was pretty good. It was pretty funny. Utterly delighted at your anger. That was pretty good. I just unleashed the unusual F-bomb on you. Sure. I believe it was deserved in that moment.

I mean, the greatest extent, I mean, I don't even know if it fully, did it pay off um listeners got genevieve to sneak a cd into your car with the cat roll on it so that

when you started your car you would just hear it you'd be cat rolled in the absolute wild yes that happened to me once i opened a um i opened a card a greeting card on an airplane once i think that was listener will right his son aiden yes he was the pilot his son aiden created a like a greeting card that you can open up and it'll make a noise but he had rigged it so it would play the game of cat song and so i was taking a flight somewhere and you know one of the people on the plane one of the flight attendants said um oh you know will is not flying this plane but they left this care package for you and i was going through it and one of the things was this card and i opened it up and it was the cat and i was alone on this plane nobody knew why that was such a burn as i'm and And then they paged you, and they said Andrew Walsh to first class. Right, exactly.

And you walked up there, and then they sent you back.

Exactly. So anyway, that was a somewhat confusing segment of Drops of Stupider. I liked those, both of them. Yeah, so there you go. You can vote on today's show page at tbtl.net.

Here I go once again with the email. Every week, I hope that it's from a female. No, man. It's not from a female.

How about that listener song yesterday, by the way? I'm just seeing this in my notes again from yesterday by Joey. Amazing.

Joey?

Good, Joey Capocha.

We got a text from the scat man himself, one Chris Hayes of MSNBC fame, saying he was getting chills listening to that song. Oh, nice.

I didn't see that yet. Oh, one thing I want to say before we get too far into emails here, I do have a voicemail I want to play for you, too. But some really sad news here in the TBTL community. We lost a friend yesterday, listener Kate, who's been just a longtime listener and friend of TBTL. She lived in New York. She passed away yesterday. And I know that she's friends with a lot of other 10s, including listener Kelly in Rhode Island, who was keeping me abreast of the situation, and listener Melly in New York City. I know that they were all friends long before TBTL, I believe. And so this one's hitting really, really close to home. And it's just so sad. Kate was such a lovely person and so young. And she's gone. And one thing that I think of her all the time, Luke, and you know this. We were talking about it before the show. Kate is the listener who, you know, this was back in 2015. She somehow found an old record of WMMS, Buzzard Morning Zoo, the show. Like an album, like vinyl, right? Literally a record. And, of course, I still have it. It's literally one of my prized possessions, and I think about her every time I see it because sometimes I have it out on display here in my office, and it means a lot to me, you know, and she found this thing. I don't know where she got it, and she somehow got it to me. Boom, boom. Yes, exactly. We end up playing tons of it on the show, and it's one of those things. I'm so glad I have this because, I mean, I always think of Kate. In fact, I also told you this too. There was one time where I was talking about the record and how much I loved it, But I couldn't quite, in the flow of a show, remember Kate's name. And I remember getting a note from our friend Mellie saying, hey, her name's Kate. Please remember that. She's not just a listener. And I didn't forget her name ever again after that. And I appreciate that. And it's just really, really, really sad to say goodbye to her.

And that album is not just something that was really thoughtful of listener Kate and also cool audio. But I feel like it's also a decoration or it was a decoration in your studio for years and years. Like it has a real place of honor. It really is. with that buzzard or that whatever that vulture is on that yeah well it's a buzzard but yeah no i

mean right it's a silly you know it's a silly thing but it for for me it just really means a lot and of course now it means even more i didn't think it could so anyway sorry to everybody who's hurting her family i mean no family should have to go through this and again she was friends to

a lot of 10 so i hope everybody's doing okay yeah yeah uh rest in peace kate and and we're thinking of of all the folks out there. Yeah. Who who are really devastated by by losing Kate. She made a

real impression on us. Definitely. If we do have time, though, I wanted to share. Let's see. I have a voicemail here that I got the other day, Luke. So I told a story on the show, which I'll maybe sort of update here in a second after we hear this voicemail. But I told you that I was a little bit shocked that after I got my vaccination shot the other day, even though I did not post anything about it on instagram at all um the next day i started getting targeted ads for like post

vaccination shot products like some kind of sleeve for your vax card exactly you're vaccinated now

get the sleeve and one like a like a pin that you can wear like a lapel pin that looks like a sticker that says i'm vaccinated you know and i had mentioned that genevieve had taken a photo of like our feet standing in line and said something about you know waiting in line to be vaxxed but she didn't even tag me in it and i was just shocked that these ads were able to find me so so quickly um quick update on that because some listeners were weighing in but first i want to share this story from our friend tiara in baltimore hey fellas it's tiara from baltimore

and i just listened to um andrew getting targeted by um instagram after his vaccination um i was Probably because I had a very odd experience myself with Facebook. At the time, me and my former lover, I mean, that's so explicit. But anyway, my former boyfriend, we was inside a restaurant waiting to get sushi. And at the time, he had bought this very expensive razor. And he was tired of having to replace the cartridges. So he was trying to find a way to make the solution solved. So while we was waiting, he was just Googling. And I was on Facebook just strolling. And Ms. Stroll, there was advertisement from Amazon suggesting I buy the refill cartridges. And at the time, and even now, we never follow each other on Facebook or any social media. Hashtag, don't post them, girl. And I was just like, hmm. But I think that Facebook's favorite.

out that we were in a relationship so it kind of was like okay he's looking and she could possibly buy um and that was like one of many little things that made me question um having social media and if anybody know me outside the podcast knows i do not do um facebook instagram or any of that crazy stuff so that was another little notch that got me to get offline power out so wow

Wow. Kind of creepy. Now, regarding my story, I heard from several listeners who said, don't forget what Luke and Carrie learned about the Wi-Fi at one point. Because you had some similar targeted ad stories and somebody wrote in to say, if you and Carrie are using the same Wi-Fi at home, then you're going to be, there's going to be some cross-contamination there. And that might be why if Genevieve was getting a whole bunch of like, hey, congrats on the vax messages and she starts getting targeted ads, but we're using the same Wi-Fi, that might be why I'm now getting those targeted ads as well. Tierra's story, a little – it's hard. I mean if they're both on the Wi-Fi at the sushi restaurant, that's a possibility. But it's a sushi restaurant.

like right aren't you going to end up on isn't everything everybody's looking at in the restaurant

going to end up being in everybody's ads right and that quickly like immediately and like you know and maybe maybe she was maybe tara was also seeing ads for things that didn't stand out but it's because somebody at a table you know four feet away was scrolling looking for something else who knows i mean it could be a wi-fi thing but i actually think tiara's story is a little bit

creepier than mine yeah i also like that she points out uh that you know you want to be careful uh who you put on on the gram or on social media if you're dating them she said i believe don't do it girl which reminds me of cardi b's line if you don't got a ring you ain't going on the gram oh i know that yeah i'm like cardi b is kind of my life coach now really yeah if it's up

then it's up then it's up i feel like that's the beginning of an snl skit conversation cardi b

life coach we kind of need to obviously get out of here today but there was an snl sketch um that actually was pretty funny can i just play it for you yeah really quickly here oh no no you can't it's not no i don't want to hear it i'm not cat rolling no no i'm leaving the past in the past andrew okay uh obviously you know me i don't i don't recycle jokes i don't beat jokes into the ground this is um kyle mooney and daniel kaluuya and what's kind of interesting again i don't know if it'll work as audio because the way that it's sort of edited together is very youtube influencer

oh okay yeah like the things are cut off and things are real and also and also what it's

doing is it's zooming in a lot on the youtube page of these fictional influencers which are kyle mooney and daniel kaluuya who are living in like a hype house and it's zooming in on little like um thumbnails of of like pranks they've done on each other so i don't really know if it's going to work but what's kind of interesting is it it sort of parallels what actually happened with that guy who found the shrimp in his um cereal who then got all this attention and then uh you know a lot of you know people said he's not such a great guy or whatever so i don't know if this

really work as audio but let me just play a little bit yo what up youtube marky monroe here with the prank posse yo it's been a crazy couple days here at marky mansion uh yesterday we hit you up with that fire hose bidet prank on tiktok where me and my boy jp just blasted random people and they got

like super mad at us yo they're faces we'd like to thank sponsor fire hose bidet uh for helping

support the show goodbye today yo the craziest thing happened like this morning i i can't even And y'all just got to watch this video. Yo, breakfast time. Applejack hat. Wait, what the hell? Yo, are these mouse bones? Mouse bones.

Why they got mouse bones in here? Yo, what's going on? Yo, that looks like mouse bones. Yo, JP, I don't know what to do. Woo-hoo, I'm mad. Yo, the cereal company was about to make you eat a damn mouse. That's illegal. Damn. Damn. Damn. Okay, what would you do in this situation?

Would you eat the bones? hit us up in the comments and let's get hashtag mouse bones the hell trendy now enough of that

noise you know what time it is milk fight they just start having a milk fight in the kitchen

but then here's where it gets kind of funny switches to a new video it's me so the last 24 hours have been nuts our mouse bones video blew up but um with all that attention some things from my past have come to light and i would like to address those allegations now they are all true and they are all very bad. I've been bad to girlfriends.

best friends co-workers parents pets and frankly my god but i want you all to know i am sorry just know that i am learning and growing as we speak peace oh now it's switching

to the other video where he throws anyway he throws an entire large screen tv on daniel kaluuya while he's sleeping and basically kills him and then has to apologize for that something about kyle mooney and this character going you know i've been i've let down my pets and my family And frankly, my God. And he looks up to the sky and he goes, and I am sorry. It's not like I'm saying I am sorry. Just because, God, he is a national frigging treasure. Him and A.D. Bryant just absolutely rule on that show.

And Kaluuya's doing an American accent there, huh?

Oh, yeah. You know, I kind of came around. I was saying I wasn't sure if it was the writing or if it was the timing of Kaluuya in some of those sketches didn't totally work for me. But actually, this one he's really funny in, and a bunch of them he was pretty good in. So, yeah, I think – do you have any other emails or things we need to do before we get on out of here?

No, but I will say I went back and I watched that skit with Kaluuya and – Cecily Strong. Cecily Strong doing the scatting, and I liked it even more watching it. Yes, I thought it was so good. I love their physicality so much. And so I think I was a little embarrassed because when you were playing that on the show, I'm like, oh, yeah, it seems like it might be a veiled reference to the Cattrall scat. But no, no, no, it is not veiled at all. It is the Kim Cattrall. It's a straight-up parody. Why they decided to do it on this day is unclear to me, but I really enjoyed it. And I thought A.D. Bryant, speaking of her, she did a really good job of just being kind of like the straight character on that, too. It's just like the voice of reason. I really loved everybody in that.

It's funny because, I mean, I presented that as like, oh, they tried something, but it didn't really work, and then you enjoying it made me re-examine it, and now I love it.

Yeah, yeah, I know that feeling. That's good. That's a good positive as opposed to somebody because often it can be the other way too. You like something, and then somebody's like, yeah, but what about the blocking? And then you're like, you're right.

I initially underestimated that sketch, and I am sorry.

Hell yeah.

We are going to go out with a song, right, suggested by a listener. Yeah, listener Travis. One of their favorite Canadian singers.

Yes, the Arkells. Or maybe it's just Arkells. I'm sorry, not the Arkells. Arkells, A-R-K-E-L-L-S, doing pulling punches.

All right. Thank you so much, everyone, for listening. We are going to be right back here tomorrow with more Imaginary Radio for you, so please do join us for that. Until then, have a great Wednesday. Stay safe, take care of yourselves, and please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

Against those who hope not love You know it's when I get an escapade Can't all be traced where he comes from There were times when he went missing But you can't always find his heart When you head back to Kingston You can find a hill on your own block Do you strike those years from the record? Do you take them face to face? I know that a war upon your punches

And I love it away

Power out.