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TBTL!

In 1971, Bill Greats invented Microsoft. Wouldn't it be cool if I could remember my dingus password for my email?

You can't be serious.

Oh, I'm serious, baby. I am Yahoo Serious. I'm Serious FM. Welcome to the World Serious of Seriousness, sponsored by Honey Nut Serios.

I like not having fun. I like your idea of fun. I like our idea of fun. I like not having that.

No, you're going to tell a story. I don't believe that I can bear to listen to another one of your stories right now.

All right. Hello. Good morning and welcome everyone to a Monday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. It's your lucky day. You just found a USB flash drive in the parking lot. My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host.

I'm in it to win it.

Coming to you from the Nest Broadcast Center high in the sky above Portland, Oregon, where we are looking at another beautiful sunny day.

Things are going to get hot. They're going to get funky. Somebody better open the window.

I do have the window open. I'm trying to create a little cross breeze in here because it is definitely warm. I'm definitely levitating, and we are definitely ready to go with episode 3,404 in a collector's series.

Let the fun begin.

As I suspected on Friday when we weren't getting to the story about this bobcat attack in North Carolina. Now, as of today, Monday, we have a lot more information about the people, what happened, how they're doing.

It's a bobcat, a techno voice! A bobcat? A bobcat!

We will tell you what the latest is on this crazy video that you probably saw over the weekend. Also, scientists say that they have now created the whitest paint ever.

Just ask this scientician.

And it's an interesting kind of scientific principle of how light interacts with different, essentially, shades of white. So you need to sort of, well, anyway, I'll just read from the article that was, you know, more carefully researched than anything I would do on the show. But the story of the whitest paint ever is pretty interesting. But the story of the blackest paint ever now and the fight over who's allowed to use it is also quite interesting. And so we will get into that. Plus, another day, another installment of the TBTL Drops of Stupider Contest of the Deuce, in which we are trying to figure out the most memorable moment in TBTL history.

We will all remember this moment for the rest of our lives.

Day nine of the Drops of Stupider. Plus emails and V-mails, and we will talk to this guy, the longest running co-bro of the show. maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. He used to be known as the Ginger Assassin, but now... Now I'm the Balding Bassassin. He is Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. Good morning, my Bassassin friend.

Thank you, Luke. I just realized, since you've been talking, that today's kind of a, I don't want to say sad day for me, I think that's overplaying it, But I just realized I'm using the very last page in my little spiral bound notebook, which is bigger than a small little reporter's notebook, but smaller than like something that you would take to high school. You know, maybe let's say the size of a couple of decks of playing cards. But I bought this at the grocery store and it's really sparkly like it's just a regular, let's see, top flight brand notepad. But it's the most sparkly notepad I ever had. It's like a silver sparkly. It looks like a dang disco ball on the front, and I'm not like a real sparkly kind of guy. Yeah, that doesn't sound like you're – that sounds a little bit look at me for one Andrew Walsh. I know. I bought it because it's what they had, and I was like, oh, okay, I can sparkle for a week or two. I don't know how long these things last. And you would think of me like, oh, no, he's going to get a more serious kind of a look at the poets in the corner writing in his Moleskine notebook. But I found that the sparkle kind of – it sparked joy in me a little bit. And now that I'm to the last page, I haven't seen these in the store anymore. And I don't know if I can replace it. It was just like a silly thing I picked up on a whim. And now I'm actually I was online while you were talking. I was listening to you intently, but also looking for, you know, just Googling top flight sparkly note.

pads and kind of coming up empty.

I'm sure the listeners will be able to find it for you right after they get done finding the coffee KitKat that may or may not have existed for one moment in some part of Oklahoma. I always carry around, well, depending on the jacket that I'm wearing, I will usually have that little field note, you know, notebook. I'm still using ones that say TBTL edition. Oh, wow. You still have those? I mean, we had like a couple of hundred extras. And it turns out it takes a while to fill one of those But I was out having a little food and a little drinks with some folks the other day Outside, safely And somebody said, oh, let me see what's in that field notes thing And I felt weirdly protective of I mean, you know what was in there was A lot of dirty drawings, probably

What's that? Dirty drawings

Oh, sure, yeah Doodles Basically kind of some, you know, Leo DiCaprio painting Kate Winslet in Titanic kind of stuff.

Oh, I was picturing the pornographer in The Big Lebowski. I'm blanking on his name. Jackie Trehorn? I was picturing Jackie Trehorn doodles.

I don't remember those, but I may have to go back and watch the movie now again. Do you remember? The mere mention of Jackie Trehorn.

The dude tries to do some sleuthing, so he takes a pencil and he kind of shades on the notepad to see what did he write on the piece of paper he tore off. And what he saw was he was just doodling some sort of phallus, I believe.

Oh, my God. That's great. Stay out of my town, you goldbricker. um anyway no what was in there was the um dimensions of the uh like there's an area here in this room that's a kind of a little indentation where i think you could probably put like a bicycle if you had one or um some you know some shelves or cabinets or whatever you want to put in there but i uh i whatever it doesn't matter i put some some studio chairs in there that i sometimes can use in the kitchen area of this apartment but i didn't want that to be on full display because there's a lot of zooming that happens in this room that's also not my code for drawing phalluses um but uh so i got some curtains that i that i used and i had measured the opening of this little indentation in the room so that was in there and some other just very like boring notes but one i was just a little embarrassed because there wasn't that much stuff in there and i didn't want this person to think it was purely an affectation like i do use it although it really depends on what i'm doing there are certain things I use it for anything that's like household related. If it's a shopping list, if it's measuring something, that all goes in the field notes. But if it's a to-do list, I have a running to-do list that's in an email draft that I update most days. So anyway, I don't know if oddly, it wasn't quite my diary, but it was more personal than I expected.

Yeah, sure. I can totally see that. Or just kind of not knowing either. Like did you just jot something down?

Or if it was empty, that would have been the worst. If I had started a brand new one and there was literally nothing in there, that would have been, again, a really bad look because it would just seem like, oh, this is completely and totally an affect.

Because a clean notebook is the sign of an empty brain. What is the actual expression? A clean desk is the sign of a –

Not a dirty mind, but it's like an unwell mind or something. It's always played to be like that's why my desk is a complete disaster because my brain is fine, and you'll know that. Look, I don't want to get into – like I seriously don't want to get into shaming people for – how do you guys handle this on Spotless, your podcast about cleaning that you and Hannah Brooks Olson do? Because, you know, there's a lot of things now on this show that we talk about differently than we used to, including people's bodies or people's, you know, maybe exercise routines. We try to be as inclusive as possible. And I wonder, does cleanliness now or if somebody's lack of cleanliness, is that something that we're trying to be careful about not shaming people over? And how do you handle that on Spotless?

Oh, I shame people. Really? Get your act together. If your house is not pristine, you are what I call on the show a capital L loser, Luke. It's kind of a catchphrase of mine. No, of course not. In fact, I think Hannah is especially good at this because Hannah always talks about, like, the behavioral. I have a lot of trouble saying that word, yet it's one of my favorite words. Behavioral. There. It was more normal that time. Behavioral side of cleaning and breaking things down and saying, like, listen, this is not – We're not just trying to talk to people who are like fastidious like us or dealing with maybe OCD tendencies like us and we have to polish. I describe myself as like polishing my stovetop with my kitchen rag. Sometimes it's like it's maniacal the way I'm like trying to polish out my sins maybe by polishing the stovetop. rooftop so am i clean mommy exactly so we realize we don't want to just talk to folks who are like that too but a lot of people who are just like i hate cleaning and so well what is it about you what is that you hate about cleaning and you know are there ways to just kind of break that stuff down and hannah's just like really good at that and just like you know don't don't let it be an extension don't look around you and and let um you know your surroundings at all be a kind of mirror on your on on yourself in any kind of negative way because that's not what we're all

about well i'm gonna just say this and it's gonna sound judgy but one thing i've learned from looking at tiktok is most people are living in absolute squalor and i don't mean like people who are living in you know economically marginalized conditions and and so they can't you know it's just not within their financial means to live in some beautiful mansion but man the level the level of of just laundry that's piled up in the homes of most people making tiktoks and i think tiktok is is is sort of a bit unique because there's a confessional component to it whereas like youtube i get the sense that youtubers as it were people will build a little set a desk they'll have a ring light it's kind of a a thing if people are like really putting their emphasis us into sort of um you know having a youtube you know personality that they're doing or character or whatever tiktok is much more confessional it's much more people just kind of like sitting in their moment talking about a date that went wrong or just being kind of it's more verite and i mean if those people if if the people that are just like half their bed is just laundry if that doesn't bother them then hey i salute you but it would make me feel very very very unsafe in the world if I were living in that all the time and I just can't believe I'm just surprised I should say I'm surprised at the at the at the living conditions and by that I just mean the kind of lack of of straightening up of a pretty big amount of the people that are putting TikToks up

I think that you and I are probably not in the norm when it comes to that in fact Luke because I mean I'm not I don't live on TikTok as much as you do but still just like in this age of seeing people's houses in a way we never did before that for me it's probably more instagram and instagram stories but like you know to reiterate what you're saying like not people setting up their little youtube studio with a you know they're doing vodcasts i don't think they call them vodcasts anymore but you know or vlogging or whatever whatever they're doing like that's a very specific thing but whenever you see the casual shots on social media and twitter or what have you i actually think i i'm i'm with you again i don't want to shame but i think that i was surprised that like oh yeah i'm just going to shoot this thing um and there's going to be you know just piles of dirty laundry or whatever it is uh in the shot behind me and i'm not even going to think about that i don't even notice that and the funny thing is i think i was surprised by that too and again i'm trying to say this in a non-shaming way but like i had to like clean our upstairs bedroom this weekend because it finally got to a point where i was just like man cannot live like this a man and a woman cannot live like this and I will say that like I think Genevieve would admit to this too like you know when you come over to our house Luke everything is straightened up and that's mostly how it is even if you weren't coming to our house like I might make sure that I vacuumed but I'm vacuuming all the time anyway like for the most part if you were to stop by unannounced you would see the downstairs of our house pretty much what it looks like when I know you're coming over to record a show and I'm kind of proud of that like I like living it gives me a sense of control but you know we always have to have some sort of a raccoon corner for genevieve as we call it um and uh that's the bedroom and sometimes i think like i just can't believe i just think like there's no way like adults live like this just like i don't i do not i'm not trying to make myself sound like some sort of a clean saint but like i cannot just like take off clothes every night and just keep throwing them into a pile like i i didn't i wasn't like that as a teenager and so as an adult i just think there's no way other adults are living with just like these huge piles of clothes next to their bed um but then you look on tiktok and you say oh yes actually genevieve is way more in the norm than i am i think that you and i probably while you and i are different in almost every way or a lot of ways i think there is something about like kind of controlling our environment i think that maybe puts us outside the norm that has really

developed though in adult life for me because when i was i have this real sort of specific memory of when i was in college and i had this little like it was basically a studio apartment on first hill but it had a kind of closet room that was really like a closet that was so big it was almost kind of like another room and that was where like addy's pack and play was and stuff i don't know why that's important for people to know but anyway this apartment became so I had a futon in the living room that I would sleep on that was, you know, supposed to get folded up every night and back into a couch what do you think the average in those situations the average number of times a futon is actually converted back into being a couch when it's something that's also slept on you know seven nights a week i mean is there the person out there who is still every morning making the futon back into the sitting sitting piece of furniture that it's designed to be because that's the whole sales pitch oh it's a couch it's a bed it's a couch it's a bed it's

like no it's a bed it's funny you know these and i had several futons in our young adult life but it was only slept on for guests so it would be like a one night or two night thing so we would you know usually have it in the couch position i will say the closest i can come to this is when me and my dad were living together this is like right after or during the divorce we don't talk about the divorce luke no uh when my parents were getting divorced me and my dad lived together um and we lived in a one bedroom apartment and we had like a murphy bed at first i slept on it and then we traded and i took the bedroom and he took the murphy bed but i think that's the right term actually no murphy bed probably goes up into the wall right this is one that was a couch that unfolded into a bed and every day that's a hide a bed i believe i guess it's a hide a bed but kind of an old school one it was like you would it was like an old grandpa's kind of couch sort of like rough to the touch various shades of brown and orange probably you know one of those and you would pull it out it was a big heavy bed that you'd pull out of the couch

but it was also our living room with a with with a bar in the middle somewhere just comfortably and strategically placed about mid line on the back exactly right so you're just constantly

always just feeling this one bar although my memory of this thing is and i was a kid and i I liked the idea of it felt like kind of camping out. Like all of this felt very cool to me. Oh, yeah.

But I slept on a hide-a-bed, if I might just add, for like about three years of my like childhood, I decided I wanted to live in the basement, like in a different part of the house because whatever. I slept on a hide-a-bed for a long time. So I'm with you on hide-a-beds being cool when you're a kid.

Yeah. In fact, when I was a kid, kid, I used to love sleeping in the basement in the summer times on one of those old, noisy, like porch rocker things. Oh, a glider? Like a glider, but like one from the 1960s that was like mostly metal and then like a crunchy plastic comforter on it or cushion, I should say, on it. Like talk about uncomfortable, right? But I loved it. I was like camping downstairs. So now as a young teenager, I'm sleeping on this hide-a-bed, this fold-out couch. But anyway, my dad is like me. You know, we weren't going to live in a house. In fact, I mean, that's where I get it from. So, of course, I folded that thing up in and out every single day because we weren't the kind of bachelors, Luke, who were just going to have, like, a bed in the middle of the living room.

Right. Well, see, now that makes sense because it's like you're living with your dad. Also, your dad is a grown adult. And also, I'm sure, A, you're both pretty fastidious. B, he's probably kind of wanting to make sure that you have a certain sense of what life is now that they're not, you know, your mom and dad aren't together anymore. And leaving the bed unconverted day in and day out doesn't send a we're all doing great emotionally message. So he was probably, I would assume, pretty tuned into creating an environment that felt tidy and normal and like, hey, we're doing okay here. But that's me totally speculating. But the thing I was going to say about my little studio apartment on First Hill was it became so, so messy that one time my girlfriend at the time, Francesca Severini, who, no, is not a character from a like a Sophia Loren film, but sounds like it. she and i think her sister or maybe it was her friend came over when i was like gone and as a gift to me cleaned this apartment from top to bottom it was i mean it was like like the health department could have shut it down andrew it was just laundry i reached a point where i just couldn't keep up with it which is also slightly disturbing to think that i had a child but maybe this was happening over the course of a couple of weeks where addy wasn't spending over or something i I sure hope it wasn't like she was living amidst the squalor, but it was like just piles of laundry everywhere. The kitchen, like the dishes had built up in the kitchen. I mean, it was just really like it was some kind of outward manifestation, maybe of something that was going on inside of me. But I came home one day and and she and her friend or her sister had cleaned the entire apartment from top to bottom. It was spotless and sitting on the, so to speak, and sitting on the little coffee table were two tickets to a Counting Crows concert. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah. How is she not your first ex-wife?

I'm, you know, I messed that one up too probably somewhere along the line.

Sorry. That's your joke. I shouldn't. That's for you to joke about, not me. Apologies.

I appreciate your concern, but that does not. not hurt my feelings but anyway so that was where things were at for me in college like i had the capacity to let things get really out of hand and then i think through being married multiple times and being in long-term relationships and living with people i started to get domesticated a little bit and now that i live alone i'm pretty i mean it helps too that there's just there's no children here there are no pets yeah so i'm i'm getting more tidy now tidy and clean are different and i'm sure this comes up on spotless a lot too um like i'm tidy but i think i could do better at being clean like going around and cleaning kind of surfaces that are in the background like there's a in the bathroom there is a baseboard that i'm sure has a lot of dust on the top edge of it and even though i clean that bathroom pretty regularly it doesn't occur to me to go through and like spray down like that part of the wall and clean that off well luke you are set up

perfectly to get like a i don't know once a month house cleaner if you can afford it i thought about i think that some people feel like shame doing that or feel shameful admitting that like it's like it's something for rich people but i don't think that has to be the case and again i was very mumbled mouth earlier when you asked about like the connection between shame and cleaning i wish I could get a redo on that. But like all aspects of this, I don't think we should attach shame to it. And if you can afford it and it's something that you want to say, this is my priority, like the fact that things are already straightened up is very helpful. You know that I think a lot of people kind of get in their heads about having a house cleaner come over when things are, as you said, not tidy. Things are all over the place. Like what is a house cleaner going to do when you have a pile of clothes next to your bed and a baby poking her head at the bottom of with a pacifier like maggie which is how i was picturing adelaide before but um you know then then you're like oh now i'm cleaning because the house cleaner is going to get here etc etc we've talked about that before but in this case i feel like you have a tidy apartment but you would like somebody to come in and just like kind of do a real nice like cleaning of your bathroom once a month and and then you know and take care of like some of the slightly deeper cleaning stuff like getting the baseboards that's perfect if you can afford it and it's a priority for you i don't

think there's any shame in that you know i it's funny because i have always thought this and like when ever so briefly i think when um when vanessa and i lived together in seattle i think we had somebody that would come maybe once a month and it felt so decadent to me although i will drop a hundred dollars on dinner and not blink and it's like how about one one fewer of those events during the month or other things that I spend the amount of money it would cost to have somebody come once a month and do a real deep clean. It's just weird how our brains are with that kind of stuff. Hiring someone to come once a month and do some cleaning here seems like, what am I, Richie Rich? But there are many other things that I prioritize that amount of money on that are definitely not necessary in my life. So yeah, I should think about that.

Do you think the reason you had a house cleaner, it sounds like the one time you had a house cleaner was when vanessa was living there and now this is maybe more question for her and i shouldn't be speculating about this but do you think it is because she has la in her background because like the only time we've ever had a housekeeper was when we lived in la it's just so much more of

the culture there maybe and also i think she had yeah i think i think it's the kind of thing where if you've ever had somebody like if you've hired somebody to come and and help with you know the keeping your house clean then you're kind of used to it you know the system you know you know how to talk to the person you used to i'm unfamiliar with the whole process because i have never on my own retained any kind of a house cleaner and so to me it's weird i feel you know i'm about to be 45 it's like i'm and i've had a lot of experiences in my life and i'm not usually like intimidated by something i haven't done yet because i've just you know i've experienced a lot of things and yet The idea of like getting out the yellow pages.

Also, let me stop you right there.

Actually, that I believe would be the white pages, right? No, the yellow pages. The yellow pages are the business one. The white pages are the residential. Andrew, I'll let my fingers do the walking.

I don't understand why we're not getting younger listeners, Luke. I'm doing everything. We're doing everything right, yet somehow.

Hold on. Let me write down a couple of these phone numbers that I've seen in the yellow pages on my Steno notepad.

Speaking of notepads, I believe I emailed you a little video. I didn't feel like a photo of my notepad really captured the glitteriness of it. I tried sending you a video through my phone.

I'm looking at it, and I have to say, Andrew, this is so much more sparkly than I expected it to be. I mean, it looks like something where they just, you know, it's just glitter. It's just a big, it's a layer of glitter, which again, it is very, very much not your usual.

vibe and i love that you i love that you were you know you went with it and that now you you're you're considering integrating it into your whole look purely accidental but yeah no i really like it let me just before we go to break mention a couple of things just so that the listeners who uh emailed and tweeted and reached out can have satisfaction um i now know that the song summer nights was originally a glenn campbell song that was my music for your weekend suggestion on um on friday uh i think it was by the the version was by a band called whitney yes when

i typed it in the glenn campbell came up first but i wasn't sure if it was like the same song

or just two songs i don't know if i i'm probably somewhere in the back of my brain had heard the um uh oh by the way i'm sorry it wasn't me uh who suggested i think it was a sort of natalie i

believe it was the listener suggestion it was great by the way i loved that yeah it's very

good thanks Natalie good call so I guess really this is a correction for listener Natalie hey Natalie it was a Glen Campbell song come on Natalie give us some context here so for we had a lot of people emailing in and wanting to let me know that so message received it was a Glen Campbell song thank you very much also our friend Chris Hayes I think was part of a fairly large number of people a group of people who were finding our conversation yesterday or on Friday about the movies crash right to be It would be slightly maddening because, of course, we on Friday just worked our way through kind of a falling asleep exercise that you do. That was, of course, not the plan for the show. But, you know, we're all about living in the moment on this program. And we ended up naming one single word named movies starting with A and working all the way through Z. At the C's, we started talking about Crash. And this is on me. We just fully – you correctly, Andrew, said there are two movies called Crash. And then I combined them in a way. There's one by the kind of, I guess you could say, very artsy director David Cronenberg called Crash, which is, I think, a film that has a pretty sort of sexual component to it. Psychosexual, I would say. I like using that phrase. I do, too. I don't know what it means, but I'm into it. And then there's another movie called Crash, which is the one that I was really thinking of mostly, which I was attributing to David Cronenberg. But, of course, that one, I believe, was written and directed by the director Paul Haggis, who was really having a moment in that time. I think he was making a lot of movies that were very successful. But I stand by my assertion that that movie Crash with Matt Dillon in it that Paul Haggis made, it looked terrible. I haven't seen it, but it was like it just seemed like very, very, very, very bad writing and filmmaking and potentially acting that people who I think are not super bright interpreted as being like deep or something or meaningful. And it just to me, again, I say this line, even though I don't even know if exactly they say this in the movie, but I have this image of Matt Dillon saying, sometimes we crash into each other just to feel something or whatever.

And it's like me and Paul Giamatti. I need the win here. There's no indication that either one of these actors ever said those lines. But they just seem right.

Yes. Now I'm like, did he say this? Matt Dillon crash. Sometimes we crash into each other. Oh, it turns out he said it in Outsiders. Turns out he said it in There's Something About Mary. anyway um so sorry about that although i want to say that i may have some kind of reason for my need to pronounce heinz ketchup incorrectly wanting to pronounce it as heinz this is in the maybe luke isn't such an idiot category a listener uh morgane uh reached out and said And maybe the reason that you're saying Heinz wrong is because it's confusing because the two leading brands of ketchup are Hunt's and then Heinz. And maybe I'm kind of portmanteauing them. Maybe I'm combining Hunt's and Heinz. And I bet you anything that is what I'm doing. It's just like crash and crash.

Sometimes we mispronounce Heinz just to feel something.

Here, can I add one more thing to your list of quick updates from the listeners? So I was indeed confusing moles with voles earlier on the show. I believe it was my cat who was catching voles, which look like little mice, not moles, which look like they have rubber hands. Oh, OK. That makes a lot more sense. So you were right on that one, Luke, because you told me there's no way your cats were catching moles. And I said, don't you tell me what my cats like to do. Yeah, you did. Now, now voles.

I can get into it. those are hold on give me a nude vole now oh is that a show title um um now but but voles are those are different than weevils like a bowl weevil

is different than a vole i i i refuse to say anything more on this topic because i clearly don't know what i'm talking about if you're telling me that i'll believe you that they're similar but there's probably a difference right yeah maybe um can i just read you a little bit

of the of the opening of the movie crash oh sure the paul haggis version read me something about crash script apparently the script was this is from the early internet it's from scriptorama.com and they said the crash script is here for all you fans of the paul haggis film the script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and or viewing crash so in other words somebody just like watched the movie and wrote down the lines seems like there's an easier solution but anyway crash script i don't know what's happening in the film but this appears to be the opening kind of voiceover or whatever it's the sense of touch what any real city you walk you know you brush past people people bump into you in la nobody touches you we're always behind this metal and glass i think we miss that touch so much that we crash into each other just so we can feel something oh there you go god andrew right oh i and you know what i've been making fun of it but in fairness when i lived in la i was in over four car crashes a week

yeah but wait now you are confusing it again though right because it's the original it's the a Cronenberg movie where people get sexual arousal from crashing. Right, I'm

no, no, this is the, but I'm not this is the Matt Dillon one, this is the Paul Haggis one that I've, I've never seen either, but I've more never seen the David Cronenberg one. I saw the Cronenberg one

when I was in college, I just don't remember much about it

Right, no, that one is now out of the conversation. Okay, but you said something

about, you just made a joke about it's true when you were living in LA, you used to crash into, you got into several

crashes a day because the premise of the thing I just read you is that sometimes we I think we miss that touch so much that we crash into each other just so we can feel something so the premise of my joke was that that were I to be behaving that way how crazy it would be were I to be missing the sense of brushing into people while in LA as as floated by this script by Paul Haggis then I was crashing into people four times a week gotcha does that make any sense or did I have I

fully confused the issue no i think it's fine i just wasn't sure um i think it's good okay

i'll be outside your house crashing into your car later if you do be all right uh let's take a quick break here and then we'll come back and play you this bobcat

video in a moment this is tbtl on your mark on your mark get set get set now ready ready go

Let's thank some dazzling donors who are supporting the program with their dazzling donations each month. Thank you so much for making the show possible, everyone. And just to let you know, we've been having many meetings and putting together many plans about this coming, this year's TBTelethon, which is just around the corner. So watch this space for that. We'll have more information, I'm sure, pretty soon about that. In the meantime, we want to thank Jonathan Nye. Nye, as in Nye's Polonaise. Jonathan says, I'm not related to them, but I went there once. Hey. Yeah. I wonder if Jonathan was, like, showing his idea around. Like, hey, do I get a free drink? Is there some kind of a, you know, special rate for people that are also named Nye? Jonathan's in New York, New York. Jonathan says, thank you so much to both of you for your daily shows. This year, I've been extra grateful to have you in my ears as I ride the one train to my job as a high school teacher in the Bronx and back home to Washington Heights. At least now I don't look as crazy lulling along with you while I'm wearing my mask. I hadn't thought of that. Yes. Added benefit of the mask.

I like to mumble and grumble to myself, which is different than lulling. Maybe I should listen to TVTL more in my headphones. I'm worried, Andrew. Huh.

I am worried I'm a little bit worried that when the masks come off I know right I'm just I I'm worried that I have just settled into a a kind of just I don't even know what my face is doing under that mask but I'm worried that I've gotten too used to people not being able to see my face and and that I'm going to be making some really weird expressions when those masks come I mean i'm like everybody that there are many many times

when the masks annoy me there are many times when i wish i didn't have to have the mask on but there

are also a lot of times when it's really nice to be able to cover up i do miss smells man more than i thought and that's the thing for me because i told you a couple of times last week i was able to go for a walk around green like i'll actually probably do that again today but it'll be the middle of the day and so there will be a lot more people out there but when i was going in the mid morning i think it was between the early morning like you know real runners club that i assume is there you know before dawn um but then it's you know before the the early afternoon crowd and so i could go like if at times like a half a mile or more without wearing a mask before i came up against somebody well before i crashed into somebody you might say um and those moments of like being outside and then taking off my mask i just like simple smells of just being outside at green lake i mean it is amazing that that is something i didn't think about that i didn't

ever think i would miss so much you know another thing that i've enjoyed about it is i'm very very paranoid about having bad breath yeah and so i mean to the point where in normal times i would if i was having lunch sometimes part of my calculation would be oh is this super garlicky do i really want to or you know tons of raw onions do i want to be worried for the rest of the day about you know my breath and you know the mask really helps with that because it it definitely you know it definitely contains a lot of that um and so that's another thing i'm gonna have to like i've basically been able to eat a wider variety of foods and be less worried because of the mask i will tell you this as well if you do smell something bad through the mask it real bad like yes it real bad because like i was walking i was like texting and walking which is one of the coolest things you can do the other day here in portland and i stopped to like compose the text or whatever and i was standing near a garbage can that must it clearly must have been a garbage can that people were throwing i'm gonna say probably throwing bags of dog poop into i had a mask on obviously and i'm and i'm standing like maybe three feet from the can and like the wind shifts ever so slightly and the essence of what was in this garbage can just hit me and went through the mask and went into my soul oh god i was like it was like a cartoon where the smell turned into

a fist and then just punched me i was going to say i was picturing it like a cartoon only it was like ghouls like the smell was like ghouls that were like then went up your nose and drove you

insane so horrible i mean it's like well i would say it stopped me but i was already stopped what it caused me to do was to jump back like i literally like took like three steps back so that i would be out of range of whatever was happening in that garbage can and then went back to my texting but it was um it was it was extremely bad so anyway uh jonathan thank you for the donation thanks for making the show possible uh we really appreciate you and we're glad that we can keep you company on your rides into school. And thank you very much for being a high school teacher in America, which is not an easy job and a very important one. And Maestro?

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go. Everybody rattle, dazzle.

We've also got to thank dazzling donor Eddie Thrasher in Downingtown, Pennsylvania. Luke and Andrew. My wife and I celebrated the birth of our daughter, Stella Mae Thrasher, last year. Congrats. Aww.

Aww.

Come on, that's too cute. She is simply perfect, which got me thinking about the many perfect moments the TVTL has highlighted. But stay with me long after the show is over. Most recently, Paul Rudd's mm-hmm as he sips coffee after asking for nude tames. A sequence I somehow never heard before. Do you remember when we talked about that four minutes ago, Eddie?

I know. Do you remember how we can't get through a sentence without referencing that? I know.

Literally, I did it before the show, Andrew, and we were just sound checking I did it. That's right. I mean, get a new bit, Burbank.

Oh, my God.

It's delightful. My personal favorite is the drop where they are trying to order out-of-production sodas at a drive-thru, and at one point, the voice from the fast food loudspeaker simply says no. Are you able to maybe find this, Andrew? Yeah, let me. This is Zach Galifianakis, right? Is that from, like, Baskets, probably?

You keep reading, and then I'm going to find this, because there's several. I have several long drops of him ordering food at fast food restaurants. That seemed to be a big thing.

Did I finish Baskets? I got to get back to that. I had a big Baskets phase, I think maybe towards the beginning of the pandemic. And as I talked a lot, I mean, there are, like, Zach Galifianakis is great, as always, but Louie Anderson.

And also the actor that plays his friend. Of course, I forget her name, even though I'm following her on Twitter. Mary, I want to say. But anyway, she's incredible. Just incredible. Anyway, Eddie says, to paraphrase the poetic Chris Hayes, it's great to hold these moments up to the light and turn them over like a gemstone. Our thanks to you cobros and your colleagues Past and present For those perfect little moments I consider by the way Paul Rudd to be And also Celery Man to be Colleagues both past and present TBT on the tens Are a bit of sunshine that I get to carry with me Each year as always Shout out to Mara Mara

Did you manage to locate the I did yeah I also wanted to let you know that martha brooks is the name of the character and martha kelly is the actor who portrays martha

brooks martha kelly uh you said martha kelly is the as the actual performer the actual person oh my god she is incredible in that in that show cannot cannot compliment her performance yeah and

before i play this tape i want to muse on something here with you for a second luke because i really like baskets as well but i also did not make it super far into baskets i think i i think i finished season one and I wonder if part of it is like I kind of I might regret saying this well I'm not going to regret it I don't know if I'll agree with this forever but like it almost is like the Bojack Horseman effect a little bit like I like them both and I think they're both brilliant in their own ways but they're also very heavy you know like very heavy and so like yeah I find myself just to you know turning on something casual so I can not think about it too much and laugh but like there's so much darkness around both of those shows which are brilliant and funny in their own way that i think that that is why if i stop watching for a second it might be hard for me to get to jump back into that world easily you know you know what's it's interesting is i've

had that's exactly the experience i've also had with bojack i got obsessed with bojack i got through like the first i think i'm on the last season but it i i never quite feel like it's the right moment in my night to like turn on bojack and just reintegrate with like what is like you said very heavy content like when i was watching it right at the beginning of the pandemic when i was watching it every night i was in the rhythm of the show i was curious about the plot i was just struck by all the creativity around it uh but now it's like because of it being because of it being heavy heavy content it never really feels like the right night to just start watching a guy A horse Drink himself to death And ruin all his relationships Exactly I can do that I can do that in my real life

Yeah

I don't need a cartoon version of it You know Right

Alright let's take a listen To this basket This is drive-thru soda pop It's gotta be the one Right

Welcome to K-Rico Can I take your order? What do you want?

Tangerine Fanta please

Tangerine Fanta please We do not have that They do not have that Tab That's fine Just a tab then no no pepsi lime pepsi lime we have coke they have coke new or classic is it new or classic

just regular coke do you have any milk water like a yoo-hoo we don't have that anything from the slice family don't have it anything from the welches family no do you have anything that has any kind of baja blast in it whether it be mountain dew pepsi anything i guess no sir let's

take a water then i'm trying to connect with people and i really put myself out there on the

airwaves um i told you my baja blast story which is that when i i got a hankering for taco bell back when i was living in bellingham and the the i was like i don't know if i was trying to channel zach galifianakis but the the the drive-through operator said have you tried the baja blast and i I said, no, is it good? And they said, it's the reason I started working at Taco Bell.

I love that. And I tried it.

It wasn't great. Love it. It was fine.

Maybe that's what they felt. Like, I need to work here so I can improve it. Maybe that's what they're trying to do.

Maybe that's what they're trying to do. They're trying to change the system from the inside. It's the only way. I've got to appreciate. Anyway, thank you so much to Eddie and Jonathan and everyone else who's been able to donate to the show this year for making it possible. For us to do this five days a week for our job, we really appreciate you and absolutely would not be here without you.

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

All right, Andrew, I'm assuming that by this time, at this point on this Monday, April the 19th, you've seen this Bobcat video, right?

Oh, yeah, I saw it before. I saw it in the wild before.

was on the show sheet last week and in fact let me take you or give you a little insight as to my journey on it when i first saw this thing immediately like when i hit play on it and i was like two seconds in i'm like oh this is fake but i also thought oh what's going to happen is this guy sets his cup of coffee on his car and it's going to spill i thought that's what i was in for because somebody posted and it's like 45 seconds a lot happens here and then he sets his coffee down i'm like oh the coffee's going to slide off the car and then i don't know what i I don't know what happens after that.

Wow, that would have been a very underwhelming viral video if the gist of it was as – and then it's just like, oh, God. Does anybody have any paper towels?

Well, you know how the internet's weird. I thought maybe that was the joke, right? It's making fun of these things that are like 45 seconds that a lot changes or that will have you on the edge of your seat. I thought maybe it was going to be a meta joke. Anyway, and then I'll let you describe the video, what actually happens. But anyway, then I get done watching it. I'm like, wow, the coffee didn't spill that whole time. I was watching the coffee, and then I watched it several more times, and I went through the journey. I'm like, is this fake? Because at first I was like, oh, this is so fake, but then at the end I was like, oh, that's definitely not fake. Then I saw it in your show sheet, and you're like, this can't be real, right? And I was like, oh, no, was I duped again? And then I kind of tried to dig up any information I could, but then I gave up my search, and it sounds like you have a lot more information. So that's my journey. I'll hand it off to you.

Yeah, so I thought that this thing – this had to be fake because what basically – for the like five people listening who haven't seen it, a guy – it's like on – like this is filmed on their like security camera that's probably mounted on their like garage or something. The guy comes out. He's, you know, it's the morning. He's got a kind of thermos of coffee with him that he puts down on the hood of the of the car. And he's, you know, he and his wife are getting ready. I guess we find out later to take their cat to the vet. and all of a sudden a bobcat emerges from somewhere and starts attacking his wife and he runs around the car and grabs the bobcat and is carrying it out into the yard as it's biting him and then he throws it. I thought the throw seemed fake. Not that it was fake. The cat's movement in the air seemed almost cartoonish to me. Also, there's a person jogging by Who just like is randomly jogging past And then they just kind of start jogging towards the situation Which just seemed odd to me Anyway, here's the original tape

I need to wash my car There's something about that line that seems fake to me

I know That seems what?

That seemed fake to me In the very first seconds of me hitting play Before I knew anything I'm just like, gotta wash my car I didn't see anybody else in the frame And so I thought he was talking to himself And so I was like, what? This is fake

Yeah

Oh, by the way, I want to mention

There are some F-words in this video Just heads up If you have children listening

By the way, that's the jogger

Asking what's going on Which is like, not now, jogger so he throws the bobcat into the yard and as soon as it hits the ground it starts running towards the garage which we can't quite see because of where the camera is mounted but apparently the bobcat got into the garage was sort of cornered and then this guy whose name is happy wade by the way not apparently just an adam sandler character also a guy who lives in burga North Carolina, Happy and his wife, Christy Wade, the Wades, he went into the garage and he did end up shooting the Bobcat in the shoulder and then dispatching the Bobcat. The Bobcat did have rabies, as you might have imagined, and they have now been treated. They said, well, you know what? I've got this interview with Happy and Christy talking about the whole experience.

Happy and Christy Wade say the day started off like any other as they stepped outside to their quiet Bergau neighborhood.

We were taking our senior cat to the veterinarian, and my husband walked out before I did with a cup of coffee and some treats for the vet.

But this morning, something was different.

I walked out shortly after.

Yeah, a bobcat was attacking you. It was one of the main differences between this morning and the other morning.

I heard a growl beside one of our vehicles in the driveway.

The wades say the bobcat ran from across the street at a neighbor's

house up into their driveway when the attack happened. It first attacked my hand that I held

behind me to try to fend it off and then I felt it crawl up my back. Hearing his wife's screams

Happy jumped into action as the wild animal tried to bite Christy's neck. I kind of shoved my arm

in there that's why I ended up with it face to face and it's not really until I get it a few steps away that i look at it and i realize it's a bobcat and i say oh my god it's a bobcat as happy tried to carry the bobcat away from his home it's do you think happy is his government

name no i was gonna say that his name has got to be larry right it's a nickname that he's gone by

since um since high school okay gets teeth into him multiple times the third time it bit me i could actually feel the tooth on my bone because there's no skin there you know so it just and that was when i realized and that's when i flung it instead of running away into the woods the

animal ran back toward the house and into the garage happy says he could tell something was

wrong i knew because when did you start to think something was wrong happy i don't blame happy in this case this writing is terrible i really yeah and speaking of which i want to say this i when i watch this video on friday because you know this guy happy uh he's got a like a concealed carry permit he's got a gun on him and he's like he's got the gun out at some point i didn't notice that i gee i mean after he throws the bobcat when the bobcat tears off for the for the garage you can just notice ever so slightly that he's now unholstered his gun and i mean he literally says i'm going to shoot the fucker and he runs after it and uh you know i because i'm so and in particular in this moment in our country where we are suffering through an unbelievably tragic series of incidents involving guns i'm just very like super sensitive around any kind of gun thing and i was almost like oh great is fox news going to use this as some excuse as to why everybody should be packing heat in case you have to like you know dispatch a bob like a you know a bobcat that has rabies like this isn't you know this is not a reason that everyone needs to be armed because of bobcats because it's just a very unlikely situation and I was also like again I'm so crazy like about animals that I did empathize with the bobcat even though the bobcat is attacking this woman and then attacking happy and like like if there's an animal that's not behaving in a way that's very sympathetic it's this rabies you know filled bobcat but even so I was a little bit like, oh, this poor bobcat. And I had this whole narrative around Happy just being this, like, gun-toting a-hole, just like, yeah, I'm going to mount this. Well, it turns out, you know, like, I'm going to stuff this bobcat and mount it at my front door and be like, this is what happens when you come on my property. Well, no, this couple apparently is really into animals. All of their animals are rescues. In fact, they were taking their, like, rescued cat to the vet that day. Like, he said that he was really not happy About having to end this Bobcat's life Like, he was not the guy that I'd kind of, like I'd made this whole story around this dude in my mind And I'm not saying that, like My guess is that my politics and his politics Are probably not very similar But he didn't seem to be this just, like Kind of, I don't know This sort of dude that I thought he was Based on my first watching of the clip

Yeah, it's always good to remind ourselves of that You know, like, you know sometimes you see somebody why am i even going to say this but you know like i'll judge somebody more harshly if they're driving a pickup truck in some cases and i'm saying that by the way not like don't email me and say hey that's wrong i'm saying yes that's wrong making snap judgments on people with these um certain markers i mean guns again a little bit different but yeah you can't extrapolate everything about somebody's life based on one piece of info do you think andrew if

Genevieve was being attacked by a bobcat would you have the instinct and the gumption to pick up that wild bobcat and carry it 40 feet before flinging it no I mean that's the thing about this

video that you know the things that sometimes look the most fake are actually because we don't understand how stuff like this goes down in a moment of panic right and like him carrying that it looks so fake and awkward and weird because it's like it's an awkward and weird situation and he's somebody who and you can almost tell like he is i am not surprised to hear that he and his wife have a lot of experience with animals because and and also that he's just the type of guy who would leap to action like that um i am not and i wish i i wish i were but no i think i'm the type of person who in a panicky moment like that i wait too many And I'll see you later.

too many moments before i finally jump in and i don't know how i jump in but chances are i'm looking for a broom i'm like probably already in the pantry looking for the i don't want to use the good broom because we just got it so i'm in the pantry looking for the old broom while genevieve is getting mauled by a bobcat and our own cat is already um is already bobcat food

i think that would be for me i would be really afraid to like grab i mean i'm a little afraid to cats anyway like if they're in a mood i would be really afraid to grab the bobcat but if i thought the bobcat was hurting like the same thing with like if i was at the dog park with rudy and a really seemingly kind of scary dog was like attacking rudy i think my instinct would kick into like i mean i've done this before with other dogs when i had my dog flea the boxer and a a big kind of scary dog was attacking flea at the dog park in seattle i went over and basically kind of kicked the dog that was attacking flea um i think my my protection of like if olive was being although lord knows olive is probably the aggressor in most situations if olive was being attacked by a bobcat and i think i would go over and try to intervene but i think i'd be afraid to get my hands involved oh yeah i think i'd be doing a lot of kicking a lot of footwork i don't think it would be working but you know what i mean like so i'm no hero i would want to intervene but up to a point yeah like i wouldn't be looking for the broom but i also probably wouldn't do what this guy did which is straight up just freaking grab this animal right like that would that would freak

me out one of the most amazing story or aspects of the story to me is the fact that um i went to bobcat goldthwait's um twitter feed nothing nothing doesn't even acknowledge this opportunity on the other hand he also hasn't tweeted since 2017 so he doesn't play in the space much oh really oh that's right it was a live wire booking be on live wire and he's a buddy right you guys

have done a lot of shows you know he's a friend yeah i mean he was nice enough to agree to do it and then like two days before and we were kept trying to like the producers couldn't get a hold of him to schedule the flights i think they maybe had already bought the flight so they were trying to coordinate some element of the whole thing and he was like oh my god i totally forgot i'm supposed to go to a wedding in connecticut or something i was like oh that hurts so now if

I would grab Bobcat Goldquay and throw him through the yard.

Exactly. Now I'm picturing that. Now, Andrew, I want to tell you, though, as somebody who doesn't like needles, do your best to avoid rabid animals because apparently you need – the Wades told this TV journalist they've had over 30 shots each. Wow. And I heard those are painful, right?

Aren't rabies shots painful? Or am I making that up? I don't want to spread misinformation about shots and vaccinations right now.

I mean, rabies is a thing, though, that like if you don't get it handled right away, like you will die from it. Right. Like it's very, very bad if you don't get the necessary shots. But 30 shots, can't you mix it all together and maybe do like mix half of it into one and the other 15 of them into one shot and then the other 15 and the other do two shots?

Now, let me just say, for the listeners who are possibly new, Luke has not gone to medical school. However, he has seen the movie Cocktail. So that's where a lot of this information is coming from.

Yeah, you just mix them together. You shake them up. You do the hippie hippie shake. You throw the syringe behind your back. You spin around. You wow the ladies.

I've actually never seen that movie.

Neither have I. But I do know that that's what happens. You know what's funny? I know some kind of dumb thing from that movie Because Camaro Kev will always say something about Like Brown's Law Because I think that the guy Like Tom Cruise's Sort of mentor Is Let's see Brown's Law Cocktail There's some kind of silly thing Oh sorry Coughlin's Law I think he's played by Brian Brown So I wanted to say Brown's Law He plays a character Doug Coughlin Coughlin's Law Andrew Bury the dead They stink up the joint that's what that's a big part of Coughlin's law I guess this is like Brian Brown's like you know this is the rules around this cocktail

bar I bury the dead I'm having I don't know if I'm being especially thick I don't even know what that means in the like you what's the famous tape we used to play all the time or you used to play all the time from Roadhouse like the three rules which are actually four rules be nice yeah right that at least I know I understand what that means in the context bury the dead what does that mean in the in the context of a fancy

cocktail bar I don't know I feel like I've been doing way too much movie dialogue today on the show including from crash but I am looking at Doug Coughlin cocktail 1988 let's see Doug in his suicide note to Brian I assume Brian is Tom Cruise my dearest Brian a guy like me looks in the mirror he either grins or he starts to fade away

Thank you.

And I haven't seen anything to grin about in a long time This may not be the most graceful exit But I know when the bottle's empty See, because I think he's a cocktail I mean, is he, is that the Can you believe Or can you imagine how annoying this is For the listeners who love the movie Cocktail And have like seen it a thousand times And I'm like, so what is What's Brian Brown's, it's like somebody who's never seen Lord of the Rings being like, Frodo, is he the bad guy?

Right, which one is the bartender? Is that Peppy?

anyway i won't uh i won't read uh coughlin's law or however you say it but i just know that it's something that after a certain number of drinks camaro kev will usually throw out there and that's the extent of my knowledge and also that they used that song hippie hippie shake during some progression scene where tom cruise's character is learning uh how to like you know mix drinks expertly uh the whitest paint ever has been invented uh it reflects 98 of sunlight uh it was created at purdue university it's called ultra white um the regular amount of the regular white paint andrew what you what you could go buy at the store right now um reflects between 80 and 90 percent of sunlight um but they by the way this article was by victoria gill uh writing for the bbc um the this is a big deal they say because every one percent of reflectance you get translates to 10 watts per meter squared less heat from the sun so if you were to use this paint to cover a roof uh that's about a thousand square feet we estimate you get a cooling power of 10 kilowatts that's more powerful than the central air conditioners used by most houses in other words this paint just the improvement in its how it reflects sunlight could really make a difference and how much, like, A.C. we have to use to keep buildings cooler. Yeah. And also, they think that they could actually paint sections of the Earth's surface with this and that they would actually be able to make a real difference in climate change and how rapidly the climate is changing. We did a very rough calculation, says one of the professors who came up with this. We estimate that we would only need to paint 1% of the Earth's surface with this paint, Perhaps an area where no people live That is covered in rocks And it could help fight the climate change Trend Wow I know imagine they could find a one Although by the way I bet you 1% of the earth's surface Is still a lot

Yeah sure of course But I guess I haven't read this so I apologize I guess I don't understand the connection there So I understand like if you're using it As a part of your infrastructure How that could affect it I don't understand how painting a bunch of rocks Although I kind of want the gig I don't know where you apply for that I would definitely paint rocks But I don't understand how that affects Like climate change

Me neither In fact I don't think it's explained in this article But I'm with you I understand painting the roof of a building So you don't need to work as hard To cool the inside of the building It must have to do with If you just bounce the heat Right back out of the atmosphere You know Then you don't have to Deal with it I guess I mean that's my rank Unscientific speculation But what also is kind of interesting about this is the paint contains a compound called barium sulfate. We used a very high concentration of the compound particles, explained the professor. And we used lots of different sizes of particles because sunlight has different colors at the different wavelengths. How much each particle scatters light depends on its size. So we deliberately used different particle sizes to scatter each wavelength. So the way you make the paint whiter, part of how you do it is you vary the particle size so that each sized particle will interact with light that's at a different wavelength. In other words, be more effective. Now, what I think is really interesting is there's something called Vantablack that's considered to be the blackest of the black paint ever invented. It was invented in 2014. I think I remember this. Vantablack is a coating of nanoscale carbon tubes It's not available to everyone Its invention led to an artistic controversy When the sculptor and former Turner Prize winning artist Anish Kapoor bought the exclusive rights To its use as an art material So an artist owns the rights To use Vantablack when making art

I don't know if you and I were doing Ross and Burbank in 2014 But I get a vibe that you and I did this as a topic, that Ultra Black or Vantablack. This rings such a bell to me.

So, I mean, it would be very much up our alley. Just, first of all, the technology of it. I don't understand carbon nanotubes.

Remember nanotubes were all over the place for a while there? Yes. Everything was nanotubes.

Um, but that's, I mean, my mind can't even understand what that really, what that like sentence means. But then the fact that this guy, Anish Kapoor, like owns the rights to use it in art. Now here's where things get interesting. In response to Kapoor having the rights to this color, this paint color, UK based artist Stuart Semple created a pigment that he claims to be the world's pinkest pink. And he made it available for purchase on his website for everyone but Anish Kapoor. god i love pettiness and spite so much but check this out this is even better or at least it's also kind of great so the the people who made vantablack it's a company called surrey nanosystems um they basically have said that they would like to display the blackest black next to the whitest white in a museum yeah and they are of the opinion that they are allowed to do that even though if you think about it you might argue that that's art and that would mean anish kapoor is the only one allowed to use vantablack for his art uh surrey nanosystems says that's not art we would see it as an educational display for people interested in the science and technology behind extremes of light and darkness so basically the company that invented vantablack which then sold the rights of it when used in art to anish kapoor are now saying we're going to display it in a museum next to the whitest white but we're not going to call it art we're going to call it education Suck on that, Anish Kapoor. I like it.

As Frodo famously said, it belongs in a museum. And I agree with that. That's Brown's law. Exactly. Really quick aside on this, Luke. And we don't have to spend much time here. But speaking of the color white, listening to my favorite sports podcast recently, I learned about something that I didn't know existed. Although a quick Google tells me that I'm several years behind the trend again. White tattoos. tattoos i had heard them talking about one of the people on the levitard show was talking about maybe getting a white tattoo he's a fair-skinned fellow as well um and he said that that's part of the thing i did a quick google on white tattoos and of course they look really beautiful on darker shades of skin but it seems according to just this quick google search it's a majority of like white like paler skinned people like me who are getting these and they're almost uh they're almost invisible until you get up close what is your knowledge of this and what is your opinion of this

i think they're cool and subtle i think that i mean uh i probably wouldn't ever get one but i think it depends on what you're what you're going for like there are people that like to have you know skin and body modifications that are again more subtle and kind of just for them yeah yeah and then there are people like me who i guess my point of the the point of the tattoos that i got was for someone to see them sometime i guess i'm probably trying to send some sort of message to the world or message to myself that's, you know, very easy to read in the moment as opposed to something that I have to kind of like look at or catch from the right angle. I noticed that Grimes, the artist, I guess we're just going to go generally, I would have said the singer Grimes, but she's definitely expanded out now into all kinds of things. she just put a picture on instagram or something of some kind of a tattoo like scarification full back tattoo that she's gotten and i'm not sure if that's considered a white tattoo

or something different it's not like i think it is considered by the way because that's what they mentioned on the show too and i'm looking at it grime shows off her new white

ink back tattoo is what i'm saying yeah i mean it's it's again it's not a thing i would get Although I will tell you if it's a different, if the choice is what Grimes got or just like a full back dragon tattoo like Ben Affleck apparently has, I would go with what Grimes has.

Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. I guess it is. She's calling it alien scars. So the design itself is, you know, to me, not as kind of beautiful as some of these other ones. Like I'm just going through these photos and there's one of like kind of just small white doves sort of scattering. And it's on a very, it's on a browner skin. So it's like that to me is really beautiful. And hers is, I think, supposed to be a little bit – it's supposed to elicit different emotions, I think, the fact that they're called alien scars. But the internet is saying that they're calling this a white tattoo as well.

Yeah. I mean, I think – like I said, I think they look kind of cool. You know, I'm thinking of getting another tattoo, by the way. Are you? In my dotage.

Yeah.

What are you thinking?

What are you circling around?

The drain of life.

Getting a drain. Hence needing another tattoo.

No, I want to get a tattoo. I don't know if it's doable, because I don't want it to be anything overly huge, but I want to get a tattoo of John Prine, actually, and specifically the photo of John Prine that's on the cover of the album Bruised Orange, which I just love that album. I've started listening to it a lot, a lot. passed away i think or around the time he passed away um i you know was kind of really going through a john prine phase that was uh amplified by by being sad about him not being alive anymore and then i really got into that record and i just kind of love this photo of him i don't know when that album was put out the 80s but i'm i really really love a particular song on that album that's the way the world goes around and this is the way that actually really it's only two of my tattoos but like well i should say it's only one of the tattoos i currently have that joy bottle um but also if i got this john if i got this john prine tattoo it would be another one where it's a tattoo that i would be getting kind of to remind myself of sort of a little bit of a mantra because in that song that's the way the world goes around uh he says uh it's a half an inch of water and you think you're gonna drown that's the way the world goes around and i think i've So I think that's a good concept for me to remember, that a lot of times I think I'm going to drown, but it's probably about a half an inch of water that I'm actually in. It just feels really scary and overwhelming to me. So I'm thinking about getting his picture, but I don't know how big it needs to be for there to be the level of detail I would want. I don't need it to be like half of my torso or something. So what I need to do is get in touch with somebody in Portland who does really good portrait. portrait and this is one too where i'm not gonna like go walk down the street and just duck into the first tattoo parlor i see like this would be i would officially if i did this become one of those people who like has a person yeah yeah you should the person who does my art which i always to be honest no offense to our listeners who do this people that have like are very like oh my guy who does all of my stuff i always thought that was a little pretentious but i have to say if you're gonna get something permanently on your body if there's any relationship that you do want to make sure you've got the right person and you maybe are going back to the same place yeah it's probably

permanent body modification right definitely and i'm not a tattoo person so you know i don't want to give any any too strong opinions one way or the other on this but yeah i actually don't find that pretentious at all because i mean you think about people who have their own um you know they have their own person they go to to do their hair you know whether it's a salon or whatever like that's the thing and that's that can grow out i mean that is temporary so i would say for people who are especially getting a lot of tattoos, doing a lot of body art, really wanting that special relationship. Can I ask you a question? I have a goofy question I'll ask you later, but I'll start with a serious question. Now, I'm looking at this album cover, 78, by the way, Bruce Norris came out, and I have seen this before, probably because you pointed me towards it, and it's kind of like, he's kind of got a big, it's an interesting haircut he has. He has a big mop of hair, kind of balanced on top of his head. So it's like- Marge Simpson-esque. Yes, sort of, and a mustache. I'm wondering, because you said you don't want something super big that you would need to get all the detail, is there a, like, best way I can put it, like an iconic representation, like a simplified, almost logoization? I don't like that. It sounds corporate. But, like, an icon of this image that, like, emphasizes, like, the hair and the mustache, but it can be a smaller tattoo without all of the detail? or do you want it to be very detailed like the actual photo? You want it to be photorealistic?

I would want it to look basically like this photo, if possible, which might not be possible unless they're going to take up a lot of room on my body, in which case I will just, you know, I will remember without a tattoo that sometimes things feel overwhelming and they're not as overwhelming as they feel.

Okay. Just in case it does become one of those things where it's too big and you can't invest in that, if you want to symbolize that line, that means a lot to you you could get like a drop of water and maybe even put it on your face and maybe like a teardrop where would i put that oh maybe like on your upper yeah like below your

eye maybe on your upper cheek just a thought if the next time we had a zoom meeting with work i just had gotten a teardrop tattoo that would be just like that would be interesting and i was just like pushing back on something about the show or something they want to do and then everyone just was like whatever you say luke all of a sudden you know i could get a bruised orange i guess you know oh yeah like some kind of a like a very sort of super realistic looking orange but with a bruise on it that would symbolize the album but now we're getting you know now we're getting into the name of the album um which then has a song on it which then has a line in it that i think is a good thing

for me to remember well it has to be whatever you like and like the symbolism you know one percent of the people who see and ask about the tattoo one percent of the people around you will get the story of the tattoo you're the person that's most important to right so like right however it symbolizes itself it symbolizes itself i love your joy tattoo now the bruised orange that you described you and i i'm not trying to talk you into anything this is your thing but you and i have i think very i don't know very different we definitely have different aesthetic tastes for stuff like this.

And I do go more towards the kind of like very simple, very colorful symbol type of thing. When I was describing like is there a way you could turn this into an icon, I think of the people who have the various Bowie tattoos where it's just like, you know, all you have to see is the color of the star on the face paint and you know what that symbolizes. I wasn't sure if there was a version of that. So for me, because I like very bright poppy colors and, you know, more simplistic design, the idea of like a poppy orange with a little with a little dark part on it appeals to me more. But that's just my taste.

I think, yeah, I go towards more like very literal and very kind of just like realistic. That's why in my house, which I still don't have enough stuff in here yet, but, like, most of the art on the walls are just large photographs, you know? I'm not into – I'm more into just, like, oh, a picture of the thing that I like that looks like the thing, you know what I mean, as opposed to a representation of the idea of the thing, which is just kind of probably my overly simplistic art brain or if you want to call it art, you know? But, yeah, I'll keep everyone posted. Hey, if you live in Portland and you've got a person and they're good and they do, like, very realistic, like, photographic stuff, hit me up. I think you're in a good town for that. I know, right? I mean, that's why I said, like, you could just walk down the street and hit five tattoo parlors. But this is definitely the kind of thing where I want to get the right. You know, I thought about this when I was in Bellingham. And I actually reached out to a couple people that I knew who had tattoos that I thought were pretty cool. And like literally the couple of people Who came highly recommended in Bellingham Were like six months out Which of course also makes sense You know what I mean Like if you're really good at a super hard job You probably will have people Lined up for you to do that super hard job That's just absolutely stupid

I love that guitar that like slides in What is this music again you told me It's from

It's the CBS March Madness theme But it's from a specific era It just happened to be the one that Had the cleanest recording on YouTube So it's like I want to say it's like 93 to like 99 or something Like it's just It's a specific era of the You know because they'll like every 10 years or so they'll kind of jazz it up A little bit

Yeah reflect the era But I really like that slashing sound when it first comes in. That scream on the fretboard. That's what they call it in the music industry. Yeah, they do. We are on to a new bracket in the Drops of Stupider contest. Like you said at the beginning of the show, this is a little voting thing we're doing to figure out what is the most memorable, what is the best TBTL moment of all time. And the new bracket that Jake in Chicago has set up for us here is stories. Let's call it story time. So these are kind of epic stories that have been told on the show at some point or another. A lot of them actually we'll hear this week come from one Jen Flash Andrews. So the Jen heads can really get into this. But we will kick things off today with a Luke story. Luke's boat crash story is seated at number one in this category versus the original just a minute Ron story, which turns out I had never heard. But let's start with the number one seed here, your boat crash story. It was, you know, it's hard to find 90 seconds of these long epic stories that we tell on the show. So I don't know that I fully was able to capture the beauty of either one of these stories, but I tried. So let's take a listen to this. This was July 16th, 2018. Luke, you can step in. I'll try to set up as much as possible to make the tape.

Only 2018?

Yeah, does it seem longer ago, do you?

Yeah. I was hoping it was 10 years ago.

I was hoping it was a fever dream. I was hoping I wasn't 42 when it happened. So this is, I think, probably the last voyage of your old boat. You went to take it out. You have a group of people on the boat with you, including Camaro Kev, I believe Anita, and then is it Anita's parents or Camaro Kev's parents?

You were Romero Kev's parents.

Right, and you hadn't boated in a while. And I think you leave the slip, and you're accidentally already kind of, I believe, banging into other boats as you're trying to kind of leave the slip area. But you can't turn back because you can't really control the boat, so you're already like, it wasn't a very good start. And then you have mechanical failure out on the water, right? What happens? Does the engine just stop on you?

Well, without belaboring this, you know, people can go listen to the story if they care to if they haven't heard it. But.

And a bunch of things happened. One, we were up super late partying and being wild. And then the next morning, Sunday morning was the World Cup. And it was one of those things where it was playing at like six in the morning or seven in the morning. and so we got up and went and watched the world cup at the eagles and i decided to just get back on the horse which is not really my normal thing usually if i've had a few to too many the night before i'm not into like repeating that behavior in the morning but this was just one of those things probably i'd never fully sobered up and i said to the assembled group hey we should go out on the boat and usually people when I say that go ah it's not a great day for me this was the one time when everyone was like yeah totally so Kevin and Anita were like sure we're in and then Kevin was like actually my parents are going to be in town why don't we bring them and it was shortly after everyone had agreed to do this that I realized it was a terrible idea but I didn't know how to get out of it so I was sleep deprived I was probably either hungover or still mildly drunk and hadn't driven the boat in a year because it had been not working and i kept trying to get somebody to fix it and uh when it finally got fixed the guy who fixed it had used up almost all of the gas in the tank so it was gas okay it was out of gas so after after jumping in the boat and realizing like like getting the boat started pushing it out of the slip jumping into the boat realizing there was a much more powerful current than i realized and that we were already banging into like three other boats trying to get out of the marina once we got out on the open water everybody was pretty freaked out but i was like okay that was stressful i'm going to leave a note later let's just enjoy the rest of the day on this boat that was about the time we ran out of gas and then started floating because the way that boat worked if you if the engine wasn't on you don't have any ability to steer it so with the boat out of gas we were just floating with no ability to steer and then some

other boaters try to help you but they realize that you'll just you'll just suck them into your problem so they have to abandon you that was a whole thing and then after all of that you are near some sort of a you know maritime structure and you see that maybe there's some safety there

there is not here is the tape we get close enough to this other huge industrial dock that i can kind of reach out and grab onto the bottom of it because it's probably ten it's probably eight feet above the water so i am my feet are on the boat and my arms are on the bottom some piece of like gross old splintery wood with bird poop on it and i am trying to sort of pull this 27 foot boat with a huge motor in it and now four full-grown adults i'm trying to by myself pull this whole thing over to kind of get in contact with this dock to start tying us to it to just like stabilize right and it's so much harder to pull the boat than i think it's going to be because again it's just heavy and it's got people in it and so at some point my momentum shifts such that i realized that i am pulling myself the boat is not coming with me but now my body is going andrew so my feet become detached from the boat and i am now swinging with my fingertips holding onto the kind of bottom of this dock and the only place to put my feet is there is like a like a buoy that's just for some random reason hanging down by a rope from the bottom of the the dock and i honestly like a jerry lewis character put my feet on the rope above the buoy i have my shoes on i am holding myself by my fingertips and i'm just like hanging there in mid air like slightly above the water and i'm just thinking to myself well this is how this ends

and you're still there to this day if i understand correctly luke that is how that story ends right

yep that is you know what i think i left out of that initial telling which camaro kev was reminded me at some point was and so if i did leave that out i apologize what what happened next was camaro kev reached out from the boat and like grabbed my i grabbed like him by one arm and we pulled the whole boat over oh okay so you get the boat over to the dock the boat eventually gets to the dock somehow and it was by me now holding on to the underside of this dock by one arm i don't understand physically how i even pulled this off because like right if you asked me to do that right now i would just die like i couldn't i don't know it was some adrenaline thing but i'm holding onto the i'm holding myself up slash standing like with my feet wrapped around this rope and buoy and i'm reaching out with the

other hand and camaro kev i'm locking arms with him like some sylvester stallone move from the you know movie um whatever that one where he's a mountain climber oh cliffhanger cliffhanger some cliffhanger shit and and and we were able to get the boat over to the dock and i somehow didn't go into the water but i really do remember having this moment of like oh i'm just gonna fall in the water now and it wouldn't have been like dangerous as in i wasn't gonna drown but i was fully dressed and i'm already in the midst of a disaster and it would have just been like one more indignity on top of all of it and somehow i didn't go into the water yeah that is pretty amazing and then at what point does the bobcat attack you that was uh oh you mean all the shots that i was doing

bobcat shots at the eagles that's i was confusing that right so that is an epic story that okay as far as submissions are concerned more people submitted that than any other so that is a top contender for the stories bracket and there's a reason why Andrew yes it's a half an inch of

water and you think you're gonna drown like that event like the event of of crashing the boat and as I mentioned in the story like eventually we get towed back into the marina and it's so humiliating for me because I feel like all the guys that live in the marina many of whom are named jerry as i mentioned a lot they had watched me like i think that they all just kind of had a low opinion of my uh you know maritime abilities and they were not wrong for having that opinion and the guy from the radio show a lot of them were cairo listeners and i sort of like crashed my way out of the marina and within 45 minutes i'm being towed back into the marina and it really was one of those things where and i think i was probably emotionally cratering from the effects of the alcohol leaving my system now like you know it's like kind of that as well to the adrenaline i'm like lack of sleep i've been on alcohol for too long now that's all kind of leaving and i'm so embarrassed and i just if there had been any option other than being towed back into that marina i would have taken like anything like just light the boat on fire and leave it just like send it over the ballard locks just like i don't i mean it it was one of those things where i really felt almost Maybe I almost felt like I was going to start to have a panic attack Like he was a really bad feeling And a couple of things One, the guys who I was so embarrassed about All came out to help us get the boat back Into the slip And all had stories of their own times When they had pulled a dingus move with their boats Which was very like Life affirming and the opposite of what I was expecting Them to do And it goes down as one of the kind of Most memorable stories in TBTL history That people cite often as really being kind of like why they like the show so you never know you know what i mean this moment that was just so awful for me in the moment turned out to be something that was a fine b i got the insurance payout on the boat thanks kevin o'brien liberty mutual liberty liberty i love the idea of somebody at liberty asking kevin well how do we know the boat's actually been damaged him going well let me forward you this episode like is that legal is that like legal proof that this really did happen because it really did happen but it is if you mail the

podcast to yourself in a self-addressed envelope i believe that's right the proof that you need there i didn't remember that part we should go to this next piece of tape because it's actually quite a bit longer but um i didn't remember the the kind of i'll call it heartwarming part because it is heartwarming of of these guys who then kind of helped and but also kind of embraced the moment with you i would expect them to help because that's the boater's code from what i can see but i also very much know that feeling of like you know there is a click and there is the boating click you know i without naming names and it's not you by the way um i have been out on boats with people who are new to the boating life and they're trying to hang with their other boats. Like I remember one time trying to tie up like there was like some flotilla. Is that the right word? When a bunch of boats kind of tie up and they all party together. And I remember one time being in a newbie's boat when that was happening. And it was kind of nobody said anything out loud, but it was very clear that the people who were driving or piloting the boat that I was on, They were new. They didn't know what they were doing. They were trying to be part of this clique, but you could just feel the tension of the relationship between the people who own the boat and you're embarrassing me in front of these people who know what they're doing. I think it takes a lot of skill to pilot those things, and you have a lot of adrenaline going, and it's hard to mask the fact that you're new here. You're new to the boat. I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about one here, but boating life, a lot of people grew up on boats. You can just tell. by the way, the walk barefoot on a sailboat, you know, you can just tell that people who've been around boats their whole life and breaking into that is tough and it is embarrassing. I can associate that with that so hard, Luke. And so for me, knowing that these guys didn't just help you somewhat, you know, because I think they would no matter what, but you could see them doing it somewhat begrudgingly. I love the fact that the Jerry's all kind of said, oh yeah, you should have seen what I did to my first boat. That, I love that. And I don't even remember that part of the

story yeah i i think i mentioned it in the first telling but it definitely happened and it was definitely it it was um and even the guy like the guy whose boat i had hit most kind of um seemed like the guy who had hit the boat the hardest you know came over and was like oh i heard that you maybe uh hit my boat and i just you know i looked at it and there didn't seem to be any damage so let me just get your number in case but i think it's fine you know it was like everybody even the people who i'd wronged the most directly were like yeah whatever like just it just was the opposite of what i expected it to be and that was a a good life lesson they

all just said don't worry about it we got mike o'brien liberty liberty it was amazing o'brien

but yes oh yeah we have we have former mayoral we have former city council person mike o'brien also sally bagshaw is waiting to park her boat absolutely i believe she works for the university

now i think um all right let me play this next piece of tape for you again this uh tape is a bit longer because it was kind of hard to cut down these stories just a heads up on that luke um and this is from a way back in the day long before well before my time on the show uh august 29th 2011 um jen is telling the story this didn't happen to her directly this happened to a couple of friends of hers who got and i meant to write it down they had some sort of major intestinal distress i don't remember if it was food poisoning she had a fancy word for it it was on their honeymoon though this you know these newlyweds and they had spent the first day or couple of days in their hotel room i just have to call it what it is shitting their brains out on their honeymoon one got the toilet the other one got the bathtub i don't know if you remember this story i had never heard this before um and so that's how they're spending their honeymoon is evacuating their bowels painfully one of them in a bathtub and uh when things got really bad apparently even drew the shower curtain so that they could have some sort of privacy as they were dealing with yeah they had a real splorch the turtle uh thing going on here so anyway that's the setup for this but then apparently part of the honeymoon trip that they had that was a gift to them was to go on a small whale watching tour on a boat and after having a day or two of what I just described they thought okay I think it's passed we're good for this now let's go on this whale watching tour

and I will let Jen take it over from there. So they're on the cruise and they're out out in the ocean and when it hits again but it hit Dan a minute earlier and so he left and went downstairs to the bathroom and then it hit Annie but it hit her like that and she realized she couldn't make it to a bathroom it was an emergency so she jumped overboard oh my god so she jumped overboard into the ocean and she just kind of swam away from the boat and everybody was like Annie Annie and she's

like I'm just looking over here oh so she swims away god that's actually a kind of a brilliant

idea she swims away and then she turns around because she's kind of worried about the boat leaving her yeah and so she turned around and was like she said actually making eye contact with people on the boat while she's having diarrhea but she's like kind of trying to wave and act like

she just needed a swim that is that's such a great solution except that uh how do i put this delicately it's kind of hard to do that in the water isn't it because there's a whole pressurization

issue well it was really hard and she was also trying to um she had her bathing suit on under her little sundress and so she was trying to also kind of take the bathing suit off so that she'd be able to put it back on afterward so and so she was treading and she was trying to get and she was trying to like wave and be like she just wanted to cool down it's so nice out here but she didn't want to make sound too nice because she didn't want other people to jump in about five minutes passed and dan came back up on deck and looked and they were like she just jumped in He knew exactly what happened. They just made like eye contact and he was just like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh. So she's out there. So then the captain is like ready to move on and he just thinks she has for some ridiculous reason jumped in the water.

Isn't it strange how, we've talked about this before on the show, these kinds of events where you'd rather people think you were crazy than have a completely normal thing, which is your stomach is being weird. Yeah. But you would go with, I'm the kind of person who jumps off of a whale watching.

her for no reason. And that was exactly what she was trying to pull off. But then what happened was the captain wanted to move on. And so he was kind of, let's go, let's go. So finally he yells out, Annie, come on back to the boat now. And she held her finger up while she tried in water and

said, just a minute, Ron. There you go, Luke. I had not known the origins of that story at all. I thought it was about somebody knocking on a bathroom door.

Yeah, I think that, I mean, I'm not even kidding. I think I had created a weird Mandela memory that Just a Minute Ron was somehow a joke from both the movie Overboard, starring Goldie Hawn, and Captain Ron.

You made a Captain Ron joke in here somewhere when I was cutting the tape.

And those are different movies? Is Kurt Russell in both of them?

I don't know if Kurt Russell is in Captain Ron, but I will tell you he is in Overboard. And if that movie is ever on TV in this house, we watch it as a rule.

So I think I had, like, made – yeah, he's the captain in Captain Ron. Boy, there was a period of time where Kurt Russell was starring mostly in films where he's a deranged maritime person.

He was like the Tom Hanks of acting.

ron's law so uh so i think i had i i had totally forgotten the context uh or the whatever you want to call it the actual specifics of that story and it's actually much more fun to know the real story than the one i had created in my mind which kind of made no sense yeah anyway i was really happy

to um i was really happy to hear that and again thanks to listener jake for tracking down that tape for us that was good i've really enjoyed going back and listening to these like whether it's stuff that i was a part of and reliving it or stuff that i'm hearing for the first time but looms so large in the tbtl lore like just a minute ron um it's been a lot of fun if you look at the

cover art for the movie captain ron yeah if you just google captain ron film and then take the like go with the what looks like the cover of the of the vhs tape or something what that's not what i was expecting yes what is going on with the martin short character it's it would appear that Like this is a bad Photoshop job And maybe what it is is that This photo never happens in the film There was never a moment Where Captain Ron Or you know what maybe it is Maybe the plot is I love it this is the second movie today that I haven't seen That I'm going to speculate on the plot Maybe the joke is that the family starts to really love Captain Ron and Martin Short feels cut out From like his own family Because his character I guess looks like he's trying to wedge himself in to this photo where Captain Ron is just really yucking it up with presumably his wife and two

children? The one I'm looking at, I don't think it's actually a photo. I think it's like a kind of a kind of photorealistic like illustration. It says when mild-mannered Martin Harvey, Martin Short, finds out that he has inherited a vintage yacht, he decides to take his family on a Caribbean vacation to retrieve the vessel. Upon arriving on the small island and realizing that the ship is in rough shape, Martin and his family end up with more than they bargained for as the roguish roguish yeah captain ron signs on to sail the boat to miami so you're right i think what happens to the family falls for captain ron uh while old martin short is fumbling around

old marty short yeah well the cover art of the actual thing it looks very photoshopped i mean that's probably because there's no scene in the movie where this happens so they wanted to try to like tell the story of the movie in the photo and um i don't know if they were 100% affected with that boy Kurt Russell was a real he was a real snack

back in those days though I'll tell you what I can't believe we haven't seen Captain Ron for some reason I thought it was going to be like because we love Overboard but I didn't know that Captain Ron was going to be another comedy for some reason I thought it was going to be a more like I'm a grizzled I don't know I thought pirates were going to be involved or something no man

Kurt Russell looking yeah looking suntanned and handsome and got an eye patch the whole thing All right, I guess that brings us to the end of the show Did you have any thoughts on music? We haven't gone out with old words by doves Sure, let's do it In a long time because of lots of dazzling donor requests So I guess, you know, maybe we'll do that here And we will remind everyone that we'll be back here tomorrow With more Imaginary Radio for you So please do join us for that Until then, enjoy your Monday Stay safe, take care of each other Go Mariners Who continue to win despite having a run Differential of minus 8 runs Seems sustainable Also Go High School Buds Sealeagues Are we still leading the league in fantasy?

You know what we lost Our pole position yesterday We're in second place now And I was

going to tell you before the show if you look at the roster for today it looks like a mess but that's because a lot of teams take off on mondays don't worry about it we're in this for the long

haul yeah we are so well thanks thanks for running things over there yeah um all right everyone we'll see you tomorrow until then please remember no mountain too tall and good luck to all

Power out.