Muse

Scientists in Brazil have discovered a new species of spider and named it after a Lord of the Rings character, Smeagol. They say they named it Smeagol because it's scary looking and lives in caves. Okay, that's cute, that's cute. I got two problems with this, okay? One, Smeagol wasn't a scary creature that lived in a cave. Smeagol was a kind and friendly hobbit-like creature who lived on the banks of Anduin, the Great River, and enjoyed spending time with his friends and his family. One day, he was out fishing with his cousin, Deagle, when Deagle was dragged into the water by a great fish on his line, and at the bottom of the river, he found the ring right there. He took it out of the river, and when he opened his hand, the dark power of the one true ring seized Smeagol's heart, causing him to kill his own cousin and take the ring. Then Smeagol hid from his guilt and the yellow face of the sun by retreating into a cave where his shame and his fear turned him into an unrecognizable creature. That creature wasn't Smeagol anymore. That creature was Gollum. You should have named the spider Gollum. Okay? Spider Gollum. You don't discover like a venomous snake and name it Anakin. You name it Darth Vader. Come on. My second problem is you want to name a spider after a Lord of the Rings character? You want to choose the character that's a spider. She-love. Yeah. The last offspring of Ungoliant Whose poison killed the two trees And who consumes light and vomits darkness You know Spiders TBTL

The motorcycle is back The music is back The abs are back The dog tags are back Beach scenes are back It's all It's all here

Okay, this one's easy He's got the freak lips He can hit the high C all night long

I can't! I am so sorry. What a bad timing. I'm having bad allergies. Um, oh my gosh, oh my gosh. I can't!

This is one doodle that can't be undid, Holmes Gillett.

What kind of disco dancing nonsense is going on here?

All right, hello, good morning, and welcome everyone to a Tuesday edition of TBTL.

What a fun, sexy time for you.

The show that just might be too beautiful to live. My name's Luke Burbank, I'm your host.

Hey, where's the frickin' gabagoo?

Coming to you from the Nest Broadcast Center High in the sky above Portland, Oregon Where we're looking at another Beautiful summer day

Oh ma, pa It's just beautiful

Although weirdly it did rain last night And it's supposed to rain on Friday Didn't know you like to get wet though So that'll be a change of pace around here But kind of a welcome one I'm sure Welcome to episode 3480 In a collector's series And let the fun begin. This is going to be fun today. We have the next round of the TVTL Song of the Summer competition.

Yeah, I'm like seriously excited. I'm kind of shy, but mostly excited.

And that intro tape didn't already tip you off. There is some big news out there in Lord of the Rings land. I've got lots of news. And so we're going to talk about that. Andrew and I noted Lord of the Rings experts will weigh in on the latest in the Lord of the Rings verse. Oh, and in the latest in my universe, I might have invented a whole workout system today. You know what?

I'm just going to say it. Let's get physical.

Calling it the burbs. And I'm going to tell you about it coming up because I don't want to miss the chance to mention that I, yes, have already been to the gym this morning. I cannot let that little fact, that little dazzling deet go by without being commented it on. So we'll talk about that, plus emails and V-mails, and this guy, the longest-running Cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. I mentioned yesterday all the life changes I'm going through. I have a girlfriend now, which I'm very excited about, and I don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but I'm going to the gym now in the morning before the show. He's also going through some pretty big life changes. He's 27 years

old, single, but searching. Favorite sports, windsurfing, and Aikido. He is

It's Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. Good morning, my friend.

Good morning. Is that from the early cut of the documentary that they're making about me, about my life, that clip you just played?

That's, yes, and we don't actually have the rights to it, and so I was probably, George Lucas owns the rights to all of that stuff. Yeah. He's a real stickler about it, so I think I may have gotten us into some trouble even playing it here.

I did hear that it is in the works, though. It's going to be a fascinating documentary about a man who starts off doing nothing, continues to do nothing, and ends up doing nothing. Yes, exactly.

Hey, we're also very excited to have my actual brother, the one, the only, the DFTB. David Burbank. Hello, brother. Hey, dudes.

Hello, David.

Welcome back to the show. Thanks for being here. Thank you. Welcome back to you guys. Wait, what?

Well, we were away.

I was the one having to listen to half-hour shows for two weeks.

You would think people would be relieved by an occasional half-hour show.

Listen, David, if you want to just host full hour-and-a-half shows for the two weeks while we're gone, you know what I actually did?

Pro bono, you are more than welcome to. For one, I will. Also, I listened to the Vanniversary, the 10th Vanniversary shows. Wow. Really? Just sort of supplement, because a half hour isn't long enough for most of my jogs or commutes. And so I had to do a little delving back into the archives. And it was very interesting to listen to. I will say, for not having a ton of sleep on those shows that you guys were recording, they were pretty darn good. They were entertaining shows.

Speaking of things that are endlessly long, when I was getting the audio levels dialed in, I played, of course, You're Famous. From back when we lived together in Bellingham and you lived in the lower level of the house, we called you DFTB. We would play this tremendously unpleasant on-the-ear sound effect. And Andrew said, could you make that longer? Actually, you said, could you make it shorter? I wish you would go more Prince on it. Can you make it rain harder? Yeah, sure. But I was trying to find a better intro for you, David, that was maybe a little punchier, a little bit just more compact. And so I was able to find it. This is a supercut of Hulk Hogan saying brother all the different times in his career during pre- and post-match events.

I'm aware of how destiny is going to take its course, brother. Bro, brother's brah. Brother's brother. Brother's brother. Brother. Brother. Brother. Brother. Brother.

Brother.

I'm fighting for life, brother. we've been hanging banging brother brother brother brother brothers brother 20 000 leagues under the sea is a nice place to deposit somebody brother brother brother brother brother i set my eyes on you brother brother brother brother brother brother brother brother brother they'll be trying to drink their own sweat to survive brother brother brother brother brothers brother vietnam 20 years ago blow my brother's legs off brother brother brother brother brother brother i love him like a brother

So there you go. That's your new intro.

What a beautiful cacophony of levels we just experienced there.

I know. I wonder if that was stressing Andrew out. Sorry.

I got my finger on the slider here. It's all good. I'm just wondering, though, it would probably sound – if we want to go with that moving forward, what if we mix it, you know, like put the sound of the creaking gate opening underneath that entire montage? That might be what the listeners need.

I mean, I can do a version of that right now. Wait, can you really? Well, I can play two drops at once on this system. There's no universe in which this is going to work. But, you know, why not? Let's go for it. So I'm going to start with.

It's going to take its course, brother. Bro, brother's bra. Brother's brother.

Problem also is that the. See how short. See how short the David from the basement drop now sounds comparatively. And that, my friend, is what the lesson I was trying to teach you.

You are a master. You are a master. Teach me more, broadcast master.

See, next time I play, David's creaking, whatever you call it, you know, cave-like door. Everyone will be like, wow, that went by really quickly. I love it. How's everybody doing on this Tuesday morning? D, you're still out there on those 15-mile runs, and that's why you need extra TBTL content in your life?

Very true. Yeah, 8 to 10 miles, not 15 in most cases.

And is this still for you transportation? Are you running to your jobs or are you doing this as – I mean it's obviously exercise no matter what. But there was a period of time in your life where I know you would like run to your Starbucks job just because there were no buses at that early hour. Is this something you're doing for a practical purpose or just to exercise?

No. At the moment, it's just for exercise. So I'm transitioning actually between my old job at the Mod Pizza and my new job at a place called Ranch Pizza. Oh, congrats. Which is a much better – thank you. A much better, more reputable pizza place, a very local pizza place here in Portland and southeast. And so for my first couple weeks there, I would rather not come in all sweaty. You know, I don't want to set that precedent. No, I think that's a wise choice. Yeah. And so I'm taking a bus there, which is great. It's funny how much the environment can, like, help your mindset around working somewhere. 100%. where I was working in, like, Beaverton, which was, you know, peace and love to all those in Beaverton. Beavertonians. And Tigard and Tualatin and all those outskirts. Love their town center. But going into, like, southeast Portland, seeing the train go by and, like, all of the cool.

kind of things that i think make uh areas of sort of central portland very cool uh really helps boost my boost my whole uh my whole mood as i go in there so uh it's been great i've been busting in but ideally i will start jogging um there and it's going to be a great jog it's actually a jog that i will do recreationally a lot and i didn't even realize how sort of close

it is to where i work do that like kind of down through selwood and the kind of spring water trail areas yeah so this is a highly specific conversation uh i try to i try to really you know they say you get to the universal through the personal and we're getting very personal here

hopefully it ends up universal uh so i go i go up sort of around this very scenic hill uh in sort of northwest portland um which is uh on terwilliger road which i learned oh yeah sure from you is

actually um yeah so bob's last name that's true right one of the many there's a flanders street here there's terwilliger there's um i'm forget lovejoy oh yeah my bank is on lovejoy right it's very it's very fun to be in portland and just like you see a sign oh okay that's where that's from

but so terwilliger boulevard goes up around this very beautiful scenic um hill where perched on top is uh ohsu which is uh like veterans hospital um which is really beautiful they've got these uh what's called the tram which is like these gondolas which are not open right now for public

i have the entire time i've lived in portland like honestly in the top four things i was excited to do when i got to portland was get on one of these like gondolas because they are super futuristic and they go from down at the kind of water level on the south waterfront all the way up to the top of this big hill where ohsu is and like day one i was like can i get on this and they said pandemic it's only to be used by ohsu employees which makes total sense and but and it is very

cool i've been alicia and i have been on it um we went on a couple years ago uh and they're really cool but so i go sort of around those i get to see usually i can see mount hood and the back of mount saint helens at different points on this sort of hill it's just beautiful um and then i I can go down sort of through areas of downtown over what's called the Tilikum Crossing Bridge. Yes. And right over that bridge is Ranch Pizza. And so it's sort of a perfect little – yeah, it's a perfect little route, which I will soon be doing once I'm over my self-consciousness. Yes. And once it's like not quite as hot and I'm not coming in like drenched in sweat.

That's what I was going to ask you. And I think you and I might have talked about this off air before. Generally speaking, are you not as much of a sweater as some people are? Like, I'm a really heavy sweater. Like your brother, Luke. Oh, yeah. Don't sweat like my brother. Don't sweat like my brother. But, yeah, like, are you coming in pretty wet? I heard you like to get wet, though. Wow.

Okay, sure. Didn't know you like to get wet, though. I am a big-time sweater. You are?

I'm surprised by that because you are very, very fit. and I don't ever see you kind of like looking, you know, I don't know, wet for lack of a better, is this the word we're just talking about?

I didn't know you like to get wet though.

Like, I feel like I do that because I'm not you know, in the kind of physical condition I'd like to be and also because I think I get a lot of mom's characteristics. Our mom is a major schvitzer and of course would borrow our Aunt Kathy's mohair sweaters and take them to the Jardel dance and then stink them up and then our Aunt Kathy would yell,

Sue, you've been stinking up my sweater.

So, like, I get that part of the family tree intensely. I didn't think you got that part of the family tree.

No. Like, since, like, seventh grade, I have had really, really bad, I think it's technically called hyperhidrosis. Yes. Specifically in my armpits. And so that's been a thing. Have you considered poisoning yourself with certain dry? I have, per your recommendations. And Andrew's. I use it, too. It really irritated my skin. no it's uh it's bad i mean it's toxic yeah it was bad it's gotten a lot better over the years um and so and now it's migrated from i do a little less sweating in the armpit and everywhere else just gets more sweaty so it's just distributed differently um but luckily my sweat does not i mean you know ask i guess someone who smells me um but according to alicia my sweat does not smell bad really so i can kind of like bring some wet um cloth or you know uh didn't know you like to get wet though some wet towelettes or whatever yeah yeah wipe off sort of uh do a makeshift

little shower i do think that is a family trait that our sweat despite what i said about mom stinking up aunt kathy's sweaters i don't think our sweat is particularly um malodorous uh that's That's feedback I've heard from people that I've been in relationships with, which is like I'm sweating a lot because I worked out, but it's not. When I was a young person and I would play a lot of pickup basketball in Seattle, there would always be this one old dude. And he would just be – I don't know what he started out at, but at this point he'd be about 5'4". He would just be covered in body hair and would just have a smell about him that was otherworldly. And you were sort of like, how much do I want to D this guy up as he's backing me down in the paint? Those were always the guys, too, that would end up hitting the game winner. Hey, speaking of which, you're not the only person trying to be physically fit, DFTB. And I know, Andrew, that you've been getting back on your grind. I've been eating a lot of grinders, if that's what you mean. In the show. By the way, Morning Edition had an entire piece on Grindr this morning, which I thought was interesting. Wait, the app or the sandwich? Yeah, the app. Oh, okay.

I was referring to the sandwich. Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

But, you know, I don't know if I've mentioned yet on the show, but I've been going to the gym the last two days, which I'm pretty proud of. Today I went and explored yet another 24-hour fitness. 16-hour fitness. Did you know, Andrew, that there's something called a super sport? Yeah. Bigger than a sport. Yeah, I feel it. I learned there's, like, levels of 24-hour fitness, Dom. There's one in the Pearl here in Portland that's a standard or whatever, and it's, like, you know, doesn't really have much parking. And it's, I guess, smaller footprint. And then you've got a sport out there in the Hollywood neighborhood of Portland. And then down on McLaughlin, about 10 minutes from here, you've got a super sport.

You won't be surprised to hear. I think the one in Santa Monica is a super sport. Yeah, I used to go there sometimes.

So I went down there this morning. And my plan was to do some little basketball shooting around to kind of just get my blood pumping and then get on the treadmill. And I was initially I was going to try to do some weights. But last night I was Googling, like, easy weight machine starting plan, and it was just like I wasn't – one of the problems was the only good results were coming from the UK, so everything was in metric weights. And I was like, I don't know how many kilograms I'm going to be trying to, like – so I was like, forget it. This week I'm just going to do cardio because I'm woefully out of shape, and I'll just try to get that under control. And then at some point maybe I'll spring for a trainer to, like, take a couple days to show me, like, hey, do these exercises. Right. So that was my plan this morning Was to do the little basketball thing And then I was like So the drill that I do with basketball Is I have to make a right-handed layup And then a left-handed layup And then a right-handed layup And then a left-handed layup And then two free throws And two three-pointers And if I miss any shot in that chain I start back over It turns out I miss a lot of shots So 45 minutes into trying to accomplish this goal I look down at my watch which i'm kind of surprised the um apple watch has a basketball setting for your workouts and it told me that i had burned at that point it was like 500 calories i mean there's no one else in the gym it's just me shooting around which i didn't think of as a particularly aerobic activity but then i realized again per our previous comments i was drenched in sweat my heart rate was in some elevated so i was like okay i guess this is exercise so then i like i i went full high school basketball on it and i ran lines oh wow i ran 20 down and backs you know baseline to baseline and timed myself like my old gym my old basketball coach mr collard would if you didn't make it in 10 seconds you had to do it over again uh-huh so i was like just really going hoosiers on it and then i and then the piece de resistance i did push-ups which uh turns out i can do 20 push-ups total i'm talking 10 and then a break and then 10 more and at the 10th the 20th the Second round of 10, that was the – that was – Maxed out. What do they call it? That was muscle failure for me. I was like – and by that time, it was kind of embarrassing for me because at that time, more people had come into the basketball gym. I started off by myself. So now there's other people shooting around, and I'm like kind of wanted to go – I was like an animal that's sick and it wants to just go die by itself. I was like I want to do these push-ups in a part of the gym where there's nobody seeing me. But then I was like whatever. Just get over it.

Keep in mind, Luke, you also were doing these push-ups after doing, you said, 45 minutes of essentially arm exercises, which was taking your shots, right? That's true. I do think that if you had started off with the push-ups, you probably could have squeezed some more out.

I hope. I don't know. I mean, I just wanted a baseline today. And so it was like I don't feel great that I can only do 20 push-ups. And, again, everyone's where they're at with their physical bodies. You know what I mean? That's a lot of push-ups for some folks. But I thought, you know, when I was done with it, I was like that was really fun for me. and it ended up for me being as much um calories burned and i i don't know do you guys think can i trust this apple watch the reason that i have a little bit of faith in is because it's monitoring my heart rate so i think the the exercise and i think these are fairly accurate for that stuff like they shoot a beam of light that's you know that's how that monitors your pulse and so i kind of feel like I don't know if it knows

if basketball versus lacrosse versus, like, whatever exercise you're doing, I don't know if it knows which one is more, like, rigorous, but I do think it knows what my heart rate is. So it's saying, look, your heart rate was where it was for this amount of time. And I was, like, so stoked at the end of it. First of all, I very much felt like I was in high school playing basketball again because I was sitting, I had my water, and after I was done with running these lines, I, like, sat on the side of the court and I, like, had my towel because you've got to bring your own towel at 24 Hour Fitness because they've had rampant theft. Even the super sports. And I was just, like, sweating but feeling, you know, kind of, like, happy that I had, like, motivated to do this or whatever. And I was like, this is a fun morning for me that was exercise, as opposed to, like, I get no enjoyment from the treadmill. Yeah, sure. So, anyway, it's all the burb. And anyone, if I'm going to put it all online, if anybody wants to download it, go for it.

Your watch didn't recognize you as playing basketball? Did you set it to the basketball setting? Or was it kind of like, this dude's playing basketball?

Yeah, no, that would actually really be something

I wouldn't be surprised, honestly

Of software engineering Okay, this guy keeps moving his arm in a certain way And then also crying That must be basketball Because I'll tell you what Let me tell you something, brother That was more Macho Man Savage than Hulk But I think they both played in the brother space But when you get to Like the very last shot Also what doesn't help is that this 24-hour fitness super sport because they're legit the three-point line is like it's not quite where the nba three-point line is now which is basically half court right but it's further back you so like the sorry this is overly specific but the old uh college and high school three-point line was just the top of that thing it's called the key and it's basically that like kind of long thing with a rounded top that is where you shoot free throws from etc the penis this is like this three-point line is like a foot behind that and let me tell you that foot difference really i was like all i could do to huck the ball up there so like probably eight times i got to made the layups made the free throw made the first three-pointer and then was just like also very tired yeah totally and like okay don't don't screw this up i'm like hobo hobo johnson playing the uh the tiny desk concert okay don't mess this up don't mess this up and then just of course clank and then I'm in the gym by myself just laughing maniacally because I know I have to start all over again and then I realized there's security cameras and I was like oh damn it someone's watching me do this this is embarrassing so anyway just letting everybody know that I've patented I'm basically the Billy Blanks of the 24 hour super sport on McLaughlin it's like I have a patented workout system which I will sell to people for you know or I'm more like the guy Tony Horton who did P90X You never got into that, did you, D?

No, no. I think I bit-torrented some of the clips. I did, too. None of them were in order.

I did, too, and it was so massive. Yeah, exactly.

We should have put that on the case. The ultimate. Put it on a USB drive. The bit-torrent king.

Yeah, the problem with that one was, P90X, was Vanessa and I, like, literally, I bit-torrented it. It took, like, a week, you know, back in 2000-whatever. 9 and then we had it I had it on a laptop we did it one time it was so hard yeah I could not move the next day like I was in so much pain and that was just it like you couldn't do it two days in a row right so without

going on are you without you know turning this into our usual rant about this topic which I promise not to do I am just curious Luke have you completed the latest round of cyber security training that we got some warnings while you were on vacation saying that we will lose all access to our 8 p.m. digital privileges if we don't complete this, and I have forgotten about it.

Do I still have access to the 24-Hour Fitness SuperSport on the block? Because that's the only access I need.

Have you caught wind of this? Did you do it? I mean, you're fine. Look, you passed the deadline, and you're alive. As I told you off-air the other day, I'm like, I'm betting with your intellectual money here, but I want you to not do it. Let's just see what happens.

Well, here's what I've done unintentionally. by going on that sailboat trip and being very offline usually i'm extremely online but i was extremely offline the last couple weeks what i've done is uh i've i've created a way higher priority problem with our bosses which is i hadn't done this performance review and like if i didn't at some point go into the system and like fill out i mean literally cut and paste like here's your goal grow the tbt audience and i like i put in like we did our best on this and then i cut and paste it to synergize with other shows, and I paste it, we did our best on this. I just like, to that level of specificity. If I didn't put that in, not only would I not be...

allowed to still work at APM. I think our new direct supervisor, Beth, would have also maybe lost her job, and she's only worked here for like a month. No one's even talking about cybersecurity with me. It was, Andrew, you don't even know, dude. It was like, I overused this term, but it was sort of like something out of Brazil. It was like something, it was Kafkaesque. That's the term that I especially overuse. I, you did this to me, Andrew. You did this to the listeners and to David. um uh i david if you want to take a jog and come back in about an hour i'll still be on this get some wet wipes for you i found myself in this moment where i'm uh i think i was still on the sailboat and i'm getting inundated with messages and i'm trying to on my laptop get into the program where we can actually do because there's two different systems there's the like ultapro which allows us to interact with the everything going on in minnesota and then there's something called like afds or wave and i couldn't get into wave so they were all going we'll just go on slack and um uh gare are like uh you know uh hr it expert uh i think it's jare actually just word of the wise andrew okay i've never heard of jare yeah well that's the level we're at they're like throwing people at me so everyone's like oh just go on slack and tell jer that you need help and i'm like you think i know how to get on the apm slack are you out of your mind so i'm i'm like i'm on the sailboat trying to get on apm slack but i can't get through this one system so i'm calling the emergency it line called the icc they're home by the way because the time difference they're not even there so now i can't get into the system to sign up for slack and everyone It's this sort of like tornado of emails between Alex, our soon-to-be former supervisor, Beth, our new supervisor, Jer, somebody named Vicky, the guy from ICC who it's been teared up to. And every single time someone sends an email, they don't know all of the previous information. So it's just – and that's when I just jumped into the ocean and swam home.

Yeah, I kiddo. And that's why they call it gunk holing. so there was a there was a moment last week where and again maybe i'm getting into too much detail

here but i got you know what happened when i jumped into that ocean i'll tell you you know

you like i got a note from somebody who was trying to get a hold of you via slack that was last week and so yeah that was what that was about so i just texted you i didn't realize you were on the sailboat when i was texting you i had no idea i thought that was after that i uh i well i was gonna apologize but i guess it had to get done but like man i had no idea that that was happening while you were on a boat.

You were being totally helpful, Andrew. Listen, if I want to be a disaster, I feel like that's on me. But whenever it then gets into your world, which is a very unfortunate dynamic about our working relationship and our friendship is, there's a point at which the responsible adults realize that there's no getting word to me about something. And then they go, well, who is the responsible adult in the TBTL equation? Well, that would be Andrew. And then it becomes your problem, which is not fair.

Then if I blow it off, it's David from the basement's problem. Yes, it's actually David, then Andrew, then Theo, then me, yeah, exactly.

David on a boat with a treadmill. I've got to get my 15 miles in. All right, let's do this. Let's take a quick break. We're going to come back, and then we will find out which songs are moving forward in the Song of the Summer competition, and we will also find out what's going on in the world of Grimly the Pleasant. Stay with us. This is TVTL.

Thank you, baby

We gotta thank some donors of the day The generous, wonderful TBTL supporters Who make this thing possible Day in and day out With their donations Folks like William Weinberger In Paonia, Colorado That's fun Yeah, that does seem fun Maybe just because I was just in Colorado I feel like I've got Colorado on the brain.

I feel like I'm seeing it everywhere. Paonia is just fun to say, too. Have you? I don't recognize that. I have short-term memory, though, as well. So Paonia. Paonia, Colorado.

Let's find out. Let's just find out one thing about Paonia, Colorado. It's a statutory town. Statutory is rarely used in a good sense. i mean think what are the i mean what are the examples other than paonia what are the what

are the times when statutory is like oh that's a relief right i've only heard an associated with

very bad things it's in delta county colorado and uh let me see here i'm zooming out on the map i'm trying to figure out where it is wow it is it's near um grand mesa it is really oh it's it's a bit uh southeast of grand junction it is very much in the let's say the wilds of colorado that must be a absolutely beautiful place and we know william weinberger is an absolutely beautiful human so thank you william also terry hamburg speaking of beautiful humans terry hamburg is out there on bainbridge island washington thank you terry arlen horst is in seattle washington thanks arlen kat solen hey our old friend kat solen is down in los angeles do i what do i say what i'm thinking andrew i don't know what you're thinking but if you have to ask maybe not yes i'm gonna make i don't think there's any way this information can be misused and so i kat i'm gonna go out on a limb here and i'm going to i'm gonna hope that you're okay with this. Our friend Kat Solon, the creative force behind The Shivering Truth and Tara Wack videos and many other amazing productions, used to live in this building and is my sort of like, you know, I guess my sounding board and my like the person who knows of what I am speaking about and complaining about when it comes to this place because she lived in this building while she was up here shooting. I think the Shivering Truth actually. And so every time, particularly when I moved in and I was just complaining constantly about it, I know it brought Kat great joy. Yes, I

was getting text messages from her about where your public coffee machine may or may not be in the common area. So it

was definitely... So Kat, I hope I didn't put you on blast. You're going to have to stay at a different temporary housing situation if you come back to Portland now because the spotlight of TBTL fame is bright and hot. And I know that personally. Thanks for the donation, Kat. Also, Caitlin Woodlafe of Eagle, Idaho. That's a beautiful spot. I found out from a listener. Of course, the name now eludes me, Andrew. But I was talking about hiking to on that Cypress Island. And I had it wrong. I think I was calling it Eagle Point. And it's called Eagle Cliff.

Yeah, I saw that as well. Yeah. And the listener also said, give yourself some dang credit for going up Eagle Cliff.

Well, again, I felt very proud of myself, except for that there was two 80-year-olds hot on my heels. Very fit 80-year-olds, though. And then Gail Kenny is in New York City. Gail, thank you so much for supporting the show. Thanks to everyone who's part of the TVTL world and keeps us able to do this. 3,400 and— That was kind of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yeah. Get down, Mr. Fama's Fiend. 3,480 in the collector series

Hello and welcome to Top Story

That's part of the show

Alright, this is exciting

I'm calling this round three of the song of the summer I guess because there was the initial presentation of the songs That David Yu and Alicia and to some degree Penny kind of sifted through

How is Penny?

penny your doggie oh yeah how are pennies paws oh she's doing real good that had me stressed on

instagram bro yeah usually when i call people bro they're not my actual brother brother um you got

to be careful with that i don't mean you i mean one i have slipped into this sorry i know we want to get a penny update but i've slipped into this mode of saying brother a lot like just to people like independent of that hulk hogan super cut i think it's because my buddy evan and i will sort of do it on the sailboat as a joke and then it sticks in your brain. And I was in Whole Foods two days ago and there was a fellow that was trying to find something, trying to find a coffee shop and I was telling him where it was. I was like, if you just go out this door and you go down that way and look to your right, you'll see it. And he said, oh, thank you so much. And I said, you got it, brother. And then I realized he was a black man. And when you say, as a white guy, you got it, brother, to a black man, it takes on a whole different... Sounds a little Michael Scott-esque. Exactly, like I would not intentionally say that, just to leave out any weirdness, I would probably not say that to somebody who is black, but I've been saying it so much, like, that it just came a little too naturally, so I just, as a warning to the listeners, the white listeners anyway, deploy the brother terminology sparingly. Anyway, how's Penny doing?

Oh yeah, sorry, go ahead. Okay, what would you want to ask? Well, no, it's just trouble, it's just trouble. How's Penny doing?

If you have to ask yourself, you probably should say it. I think I'm going to make the executive decision. Well, we look at the

flowchart, and David is in charge, so you probably have to say it. This is literally something that I have gotten in trouble for saying on the show before, for real, like years ago. I'm going to say back in 2015 or something. And I think I was somewhat missing.

interpreted but i do think i'm gonna try to make myself very clear here because i got so much pushback on this idea the first time i said it by a lot of white people in our audience that i've been looking for more and more examples as the years go on and i swear there's a pattern here i am not saying that every time a white person says dude they are talking about a black person but white people invoke the word dude with the word black people who I never hear the word say dude will say he was a black dude and I'm not really I swear I hear it all the time and the last time I said this on the show I got so much pushback from people who are saying I say dude all the time I call my brother-in-law dude or all these examples I'm not saying that if you're a white person and you say the word dude that you're racist or or anything along those lines But I have noticed something that people will say white guy but black dude. And I think it's mostly white people who do it.

I will – I'll actually – I'll second that. I feel like – and I don't know if it's maybe a regional thing in the northwest because there is not a huge population of people of color up here. And so white people are not necessarily like super good at vocalizing those sort of things. But, yeah, I've noticed people, especially, like, people who are sort of dad-aged, generationally, instead of saying guy or man, they will say dude if they're describing a person of color.

See, it's funny because I think of, to me, dude is very associated with, like, surfer dude. So, like, the hook-a-pow, so-pitted guy, this dude.

Dude, you get the best barrels ever, dude. Just, like, you pull in, and you just get spit right out of them. And you just drop in And just smack the lip

That guy sounds like a dude to me So I'm not I am not trying to say this To like Virtue signal Or be like I'm so not racist Because I recently called A black man brother In a Whole Foods So I pretty much Pretty much need to step down Off of whatever That soapbox is But I think My use of dude Would almost always be And maybe this is It's own problem It'd be around A certain kind of guy Who's like Surfery And reminds me In some way of Spicoli

that's a dude to me yeah no i get you know again there are a lot of different uses also like you know my sister if she texts me out of the blue it almost always starts with dude i i heard you talking about this on the show so i'm not saying that every instance is that but i will just hear people i will also hear here's another example that is actually kind of close to the example i gave which is i think a little bit more innocuous you hear it with big a lot like on sports radio somebody might say that was a big dude you know that's another example of it whether they're they're white or black but just i'm and i'm not going to call this person out as somebody known on the show and this is not even somebody who is like kind of like you know our parents generation because i do think it's a holdover from like kind of like you remember the airplane movies and there's this whole joke about like jive turkey talk yeah and i think it's a holdover from that and white people maybe like starting to like trying to trying to in in a weird awkward way try to maybe include or bring people black people into the conversation back in the day when it didn't happen as much i don't know but i feel like at some point white people tried to feel more comfortable talking about black people by saying black dude i think i don't think you're

wrong about this andrew um and but to me what i hear when when you're just giving an example is it sounds like a person who's uncomfortable on some deep level around or talking about a person of color and so in the attempt to be casual about it and to be you know just like i can hear somebody particularly of a certain generation saying you know he was a black dude and it just sounding tonally really weird because of what i'm and maybe it's just my assumption but what i'm assuming is happening behind the scenes with that with that kind of like way of talking about it i do think

the last example i thought of and i started to say this a moment ago and i'm not going to call them out but i'm talking about somebody who is younger than me more just basically smarter than me and more progressive than me and like all these ways and she said black dude the other day and like a bell it went off in my head i've never heard her say the word dude before well all the

listeners now except the ones that are mad at you andrew and i guess now me and david so at least there's now there are three of them just listen for it that's all i'm saying i'm not even saying

Like, Judge, just listen for it. You'll hear people say that a lot.

What is that meme, Davey? I know you're – now there are two of them. This has gotten – as I often do, I have used that meme with zero understanding of – I mean, I know it's Star Wars.

Yeah, so it's these two aliens in the first prequel film, The Phantom Menace. It's these two sort of ambassadors of the separatists who are sort of like opposed to the united like.

public of all of these planets which is um it's it's a whole it's a whole thing we're going to get into lord of the rings i don't want to get into all the star when are you starting to teach your star wars class at the uw yeah but it's basically these um it's at the very beginning of the film and on this separatist ship uh obi-wan kenobi and qui-gon jinn who's played by liam neeson uh comes in they both come in and they're sort of these aliens are looking on they're like security scanners and they see one of um the jedi's just going through and just like destroying droids uh and then they see qui-gon come in and they're like no there are two of them i love it whole thing yeah i love it uh anyway how's power pennies pause which were burned on the on the where um so well that that was the common assumption when people saw her uh socks on her i called animal control i tried to have her taken away you and alicia are clearly not into her enough the thing was so uh for since we got her about a year ago um she uh she's a cattle dog so she loves running she's very energetic and so her and i um have on most days gone on sort of little short runs together um up through sort of the neighborhood area of where we live uh and it's been super fun it's always like a highlight of my day and i hope of her day as well um and it was actually after the heat wave so during the like big time heat wave we didn't go on the run because there's a lot of asphalt in that sort of in the trail that we take um and it just was not did not seem like a safe thing to do uh and so it was sort of after the heat wave it was only like 85 degrees out most days and this was probably five weeks back uh we went on sort of our first run in a while um because it had cooled down and we were coming down this sort of hill area on the asphalt and i took my focus off of her she's on the leash and we're running together and it's usually she's like pulling me forward like she's just going and going like a like a husky on a pulling like a sled a snow sled um and she stopped i think to like she saw something in the bushes maybe or uh or i don't know what reason but she stopped and i wasn't paying attention and i didn't realize that all of her momentum had stopped and all of my momentum kept going forward and so i like accidentally pulled her forward and her front paws uh scraped on the asphalt much like yours would when you were a kid and you would fall off your bike and it was like you could see like the skin of her paw hanging off and it was i had to carry her back home and it was like it was how long of How many miles did you carry her back home? It was probably like a half mile or something. It was not a very long distance to carry her back. This isn't about me having to carry her. No, it's about you torturing your dog. This is classic David. You start the fire and then you show up to put it out. Now you're the hero.

Wow. Who does that remind me of? But she's doing really good now. She had bandages on her paws for a week or two. which like i don't i know that that's like not something you'd ever want any animal to go through but that was damn cute it was adorable yeah we call them her little boxing gloves um and and then she was we would put socks on her uh after that just to sort of keep the healing process and now she's uh graduated out of the sock level and is back to like basically being able to go almost full speed and certainly if we're like on grass anywhere i'll let her just go nuts and But it's so nice seeing her back to normal and enjoying life again. Now just get her to stop saying Black Dude. Yeah, we'll be somewhere. Okay, let's talk Song of the Summer. Where are we at now with this? It's eight songs? It is, yeah. So this is the results of round two. So we're going into round three, as you were saying. And so the first matchup of this round was two very heavy hitters. It was the song Solar Power by Lorde. Oh, yes. Which people are really obsessed with, big on TikTok. And then the song Montero by Lil Nas X. And this one was very close. Andrew texted me last night. This is blowing my mind. We were astounded by how close it was. This came down. No votes for DaBaby? Zero votes. Well, that's probably good. The difference was one vote. Out of a lot, right? One single vote. Out of over. Was the person Montero347 at gmail.com? Because that could have been Lil Nas X. He's very active on all sorts of things. I didn't know that there was a piece on All Things Considered, a great piece, I thought, about him yesterday. And I didn't realize that he sort of before Lil Nas X was the performer that we think of.

was trying to get like old town road off the ground and even before that he was a i want to say now i might forget which one he was either a nikki minaj stan or he might have been a cardi b stan that would make sense he was like one of those extremely to take it back to extremely online he was just a fan of of i think cardi b and he would just be like constantly online and in the forums and like and that the the reporter for npr she was saying she thinks that's part of why he has done such a great job with social media and with he just knows how that shit works totally like a 10 starting a tbtl type show and then moving all of our listeners over to their show and don't please nobody do that please because louise this is my only i mean this is probably the only job that i can reliably think i might be able to have you know over the course of the next 10 years but anyway uh so uh this was a one vote one vote was the difference and the winner

by that one vote was Lord Solar Power.

It makes sense. I like both songs and like you say Lil Nas X is just a force to be reckoned with. You know what I mean? I actually I'm not like some huge fan of Lil Nas X and I don't know that much about him But like, you know, I just have a strong feeling that he's going to be like the, you know, the cultural icon for probably decades going forward. So I think he'll be fine. But also this Lorde song just reeks of summertime.

Yeah. You know, I am. I understand why this Lorde song made it through. I will say I think Lil Nas X's music in general is just way more interesting. um he just came out with this new song with jack harlow called uh industry baby it's so good yeah just like all of his songs have some sort of underlying commentary but it also does not take away from the sort of like interesting musicality of it and also lyrically he does a lot of just like funny things with his lyrics uh he's clearly just very talented um and so i'm sure we will see a lot from him this this won't be the uh luckily for him this won't be the end well that's the

thing right and then losing the song of the summer is right i think he'll he'll probably be okay but another thing i'm just going to keep repeating this atc piece or insights that i didn't have before listening to it um she was talking about how uh an interesting thing about the way little nas x writes his music and the way that he is out because there have been many you know pop stars who have not been out at the beginning of their career because that can obviously be bad for sales or whatever what Lil Nas X does that's quite interesting is he talks about his sex life and sings about and raps about or whatever it is he's exactly doing depending on the song he is talking about his gay relationships and his gay love in the way that straight artists have for years like there was long periods of time where like an Elton John and this is not to shade Elton John but like an Elton John is singing songs but there you could take them to be a heterosexual love song I mean everything had to be sort of general and Lil Nas X is like i'm going to be talking in all of the same raunchy terminology about my same-sex relationships as everyone else talking about about their you know different gender relationships and that's kind of cool and i think pretty new at least at this kind of mainstream level well and as far as

hip-hop what i love and what what he's done which i think a lot of um really great female uh hip-hop artists like megan the stallion and cardi b have done is he instead of uh sort of objectifying and sexualizing a sort of nameless body like a lot of male rappers will do towards female bodies he's doing it towards himself and he's like sexualizing himself and using that to sort of like i don't know he he uses it much to his advantage and um it's a breath of fresh air i'm gonna start doing

that on this show as soon as my body is worth objectifying looking forward to that just some more wind sprints and that's all i need i just gotta do the burbs in five days a week okay so So Laura is moving on.

Can I ask a quick question here? No, that's a problem. I just am I stealing this from you, David? Because I was going to draw a comparison here that I don't know if it's apt or not. And now I'm trying to think if it is apt, if I'm stealing it. But like I almost get Madonna vibes from him in the way of like totally like trans. That's what I was babbling before about how I just think he's going to be like such an institution going forward for years and years and years. I just feel like this feels like Madonna in the 80s as far as as far as just claiming sexuality and bringing that to music and a huge amount of talent and just like really changing the landscape about what is what can be and what is expected from artists.

I think that's a great comparison and I think that's very apt and I would I would very much see him coming out with a lot of a lot more interesting music and also just going in a.

bunch of different directions and all of those directions probably being very successful for him including acting or comedy or uh just different genres of music i could see him doing a lot of different probably get an egot uh-huh yeah he just has he just has so much charisma to him

yeah certainly okay so lord is moving on but lil mas x is going to be all right

what's up next uh so up next is uh is the matchup of um the john batiste song freedom right and the song by Steady Holiday, Sunny in the Making. And this one, this was a matchup that was also surprising, and it was because of how much of a landslide it was. There was a difference of, it looks like 161 votes, which is obviously a huge difference when there were, you know, somewhere around 400 votes total. And the winner is John Batiste. Freedom.

I'm sort of sad to see a steady holiday go, but I got to say I'm not super shocked, I think. This is a very summer, you know what I mean? I love that other song, but I don't know if it, again, just had whatever that je ne sais quoi of song of the summer is.

Well, it also doesn't probably hurt the John Batiste cause, at least as it relates to TBTL, that I've been saying. Him winning the contest is the key to me becoming friends with him. Oh, right. Talk about putting your thumb on the scale. I put my whole weight on the scale with that one. And that song is just so good, though. Sorry. I love it. Nothing against Steady Holiday because that is also a good song.

Yeah, it felt like Kentucky versus Seton Hall or something like that. Like, it was never – they were – Sonny in the Making was never going to win. But it was nice that they got that part.

Well, sitting all back in the PJ Carlissimo days, they might have had a chance. I suppose. That's what I was going to say. I should say UW because UW never has a chance in the tournament. Geez. Or anywhere. I can't – I've moved into the way that I think about my college teams that I've rooted for my whole life not being particularly competitive is I just say it's because the UW's academics are too high. I don't even think that's true, but that's how I comfort myself. When I realized the Pac-12 will never again win a college football championship, I just go, yeah, because we care about, like, the real things, like academics. Even though I would literally let anyone on the Husky football team if they could just win games. I do not – I literally do not care who they are and what they've done.

I just – I revert to blaming. Who's the head of the Pac-12? Oh, I don't know that guy's name anymore. But he – I think he just resigned. Yeah, something like that. All of the deals that he made as far as TV deals and just like isolating the Pac-12 outside of every other conference. But that's a whole sport ball conversation we don't need to have.

I turned on Lebitard the other day and and this is probably more Andrew specific, but they were just actually they were talking to John Skipper. Oh, yeah, I heard the boss of their network. First of all, that guy's radio gold. I know he's just like he's from North Carolina. He's got this great accent. And he's just avuncular and knows everything about this, like, college conference stuff because he used to be the head of, like, the ESPN. One of those – he was the head of ESPN, but he also was instrumental in bringing together some of these conferences. So he understands – or at least the TV side of them. He really understands the mechanics of it all. I have never felt more lost in a sports conversation that I was more intrigued by.

Yeah, I know. Oh, right, because there are a couple schools trying to, like, move conferences or something like that.

Yeah, in Texas and Oklahoma because they're all – they get all the money. And so they're like, we don't want to share this with, you know, you know, other teams that aren't bringing in as much. But, yeah, I was I was totally I had no idea what was going on, but I was finding it overall intriguing to listen to. Yeah. Yeah. Me too. How people usually experience TBT.

Exactly. So by the way, I love the idea of you shoveling nerds into a volcano, like just science majors and other academics just to win one basketball championship for the UW.

luke i feel like you would make that sacrifice a hundred percent by the way apparently someone named george klievkoff is the commissioner of the pac-12 that's new though i think it was like

is it larry scott larry scott just resigned like this summer i believe okay thank you uh okay so

what's next next the third matchup is uh the doja cat and sizza song kiss me more and that was verse uh the kamau and adeline song mango oh right right and this one was also not uh very close it was kind of a runaway and the song that one was uh kiss me more oh

This song just makes me want to go look at TikTok. Do you know that I've been using TikTok as a kind of like a behavioral control device? How so? Because sometimes there'll be a time where, you know, I live here by myself. I have access to bird and lime scooters. There are lots of fun bars not too far from me. And it'll be like, maybe I watched the Mariner game. Maybe I had a beer or two. And I'm kind of like, it's 9, and I'm like, you know what? It's really time to do is start winding down for the night. But then a little back of my brain goes, or we walk down to my father's place, and maybe we have a little JMO, and we just enjoy that. And it's always a bad idea for me at that hour. Like, it's just I'm never happy the next day that that was the call I make. But then what I tell myself is, or you could go get in bed, get really cozy, and look at TikTok for an hour. That's not bad. And it's actually, like, it works. That's what Alicia and I do every night. I know that's kind of messed up that that's what it takes, but I'm like, that'll also be fun. And then I do it, and then I'm in bed looking at TikTok, and then I go to sleep. And then I have not abused my body further with strong drink and late night.

I don't think that's weird at all. I mean, would it be weird if it was TV? Like if you just said, hey, if there's a special TV show that you love, and you said, you know what? I could go to my brother's place and tie one on, but you know what? That show I love is on TV, so I'm going to go home and just watch that. Or even just like Jeopardy or whatever it is. So it's a smaller screen in a different format. But I don't think that's weird. I think that's actually pretty cool.

I mean, I just feel – even though I talk about it incessantly, I also have internalized a certain amount of embarrassment around TikTok because I'm pretty old to be looking at it as much as I do. It also is where any kind of moderately current cultural reference I have comes from. But no, I mean, honestly, it is a thing probably once every week or two where I'm like, no, no, choose the light. Choose TikTok in bed, Burbs.

Yeah, and you're also disciplined because if I were to do that, I would say, yeah, go home and watch TikTok in bed with a fifth of Jim Beam. You're still showing some discipline.

There is a weird – yeah, this is not what we need to be getting into at this moment of the show. But I do have a weird – like if I have – like last night I had a beer watching the baseball game. and then i was sort of like i could have one but also because i'm trying to like i'm trying to be more careful about what i'm eating and drinking calories wise but i was like i could have another one and then i just i waited like 20 minutes because i was just doing other things and then in those 20 minutes all appeal of having more drink passed which is that's just my wiring i mean then had i kept going with it i probably wouldn't be here today david would be solo hosting i would be at lna it'd be a whole situation but it's weird how am i like i don't Like, if I create a little break, and I wasn't even doing it intentionally. But, yeah, the fifth by myself at 11 for some strange reason is not appealing to me. The fifth sitting at the bar playing Kino is very appealing to me. So whatever I can do to kind of divert that train is usually probably good. Okay. Anyway, I'm going to go look at TikTok because I have a real lust for drink.

I'm feeling thirsty.

All right. What's next, D? So the final matchup for today is the Waxahachie song Lilacs. Oh, yeah. And that was up against the Japanese breakfast song Be Sweet. Oh, yeah, which didn't be sweet.

I don't know if I said that correctly. Wasn't that song kind of a runaway hit in the last round? I forget what it was going up against, but it won by a pretty surprising.

Yes, I actually have my notes from that, and it was a runaway in the last round, as was Lilacs, though, because it was up against that Chemical Brothers song in the last round. So this is North Carolina going up against Duke. And so it was – the one that won got 203 votes as opposed to 162 votes. So it was a fairly wide margin actually. And the winner was Japanese Breakfast. Be sweet.

The more I hear this song, the more I like it. Like, I've been hearing it in various, you know, places that I'm at. On the nights when I don't go to the TikTok route, I'll hear it, you know, coming out of a jukebox somewhere. And I'm always like, oh, yeah, this song. I am shocked.

I'm so shocked by this. Yes, I'm sorry to cut you off, Luca. Well, I just – Go ahead. No, go ahead. Go ahead.

I saw a tweet from Michelle Zahner, who is the performer who plays in her Japanese breakfast. You know, she has that great book, Crying in H Mart. And she tweeted out the other day, I'm literally crying in H Mart. I think she was in H Mart having an emotional breakdown Which is funny

I love this song and you guys have indicated Again like the exposure to a lot of this music Is just through the segment that we've been doing On TBTL like I'm not seeing You know I'm not on the TikToks or listen to the pop The pop stations much I mean unless you consider Kixi Radio to be a pop station

the music is as cool now as it was then but I just thought that our love of that Waxahachie song and the whole album and the way we've been like it's kind of become I guess I've laid off it a little bit but like Veeves and I have just been listening to that record while we play cards outside to me I really thought this was going to be down to Waxahachie and Solar Power and that Waxahachie would eventually win it felt so TBTL-y to me so the fact that not only is it knocked out didn't even make it of the final but that it wasn't even close just really shocks me but i think that is also just how out of touch i am with what's going on in the world you know and i think it also has to do with

like the trajectories of both of the songs it feels like japanese breakfast that album was just sort of released in the last month or two and so it's sort of on the rise and that specific song is like luke said is is gaining a lot of ground um outside of the tbtl universe and while Waxahachie obviously has A very dear place In a lot of hearts of listeners I think Because that one came out last Year it's There might be a disconnect there But yeah that is kind of disappointing Because yeah that All those Waxahachie songs are so good

Everyone is still Welcome to go listen to St. Cloud though Front to back Why do we put you on the flow chart That was a mistake Some of your rulings are very capricious Okay, so the final four, what are we talking about here?

The semi-final round matchups are Lord Solar Power versus Jean-Baptiste Freedom. That'll be interesting. Big ones. And then Doja Cat Kiss Me More versus Japanese Breakfast Be Sweet. I already know how this is going to go down.

I was going to ask if you want to make predictions or if that's too, maybe we should avoid that. It's going to go down, and I feel like it's going to be – it's just going to be a real – I don't think people like it when we use the term Sophie's Choice because the actual plot of that film is so dark about someone having to make an awful choice.

Catch-22, would that be a better – Yeah. Is that the right way to use that? No. No.

What's a – I mean, can we talk to PETA? What's the – how can I say a hard decision for me? Basically with – Thrill two birds with one scone? Thrill two birds with one song? What's going to happen, I think Is John Batiste and Japanese Breakfast are going to square off in the championship And I'm going to have And I love both of those I mean, I love all four songs, to be honest with you But my guess is it's going to be John Batiste Against Japanese Breakfast, and I don't think there can be A loser in that, because they're both really great

Wow, I thought for sure it'd be Solar Power Versus Japanese Breakfast That was my prediction, but again

The listeners know that I need to become friends with John Batiste

I guess so, yeah, I actually I don't think I've said this in the show and I don't know if it really matters but I'm going to say it like this not to offend anybody so only Leon Redbone can hear you I've been to where'd you drop kick Batiste that Batiste song is like one of my least favorite of the original crop and I can't remember Luke why are you trying to become friends with him I forgot this whole thing is that because he's a black dude I don't know if I'm salting this whole thing but like brother To me, it just seems so, like, it's good, but it's just so, it's just fine.

It's almost like that BTS song a little bit. Like, it's too overly bubblegummy.

Yeah, remember a few years ago for Song of the Summer, there was, like, was it Timberlake doing, like, I'm happy? Or maybe it wasn't Timberlake. It was somebody else. There was some song about just, like, being happy. Pharrell? Yeah, maybe. Was that a Pharrell song? Yeah, Despicable Me song. Yeah, I think I may be confusing some things here. Anyway, it just seems so fine, but it just seems so workaday, pop-happy, like, whatever.

I think – well, I'll just tell you my – I think where my affection comes from – first of all, I just love that dude. And to me, that song makes – I mean, even if it's not maybe edgy or even if it's not doing anything, it's like a really well-made piece of pizza to keep it in David's current line of work reference. I like that. um uh it's like it's something that yes is probably created for a mass audience and but it's just in my mind it's done very well and every time i hear that song i just feel like summery and happy and it makes me feel happy so that's kind of i guess all i can say about that but i don't think you're wrong andrew that it's not a it's not the most overly complex song yeah

yeah i guess maybe that's what i'm saying well yeah i would agree with that i also think solar power is not necessarily the most like uh intricate or interesting um song it is also a

pop hit but we will see don't you think the structure of of solar power is really interesting i mean the fact that they don't even get to the chorus until like near the end of the song i feel like it's actually i feel like it It's actually the opposite of freedom, whereas freedom, like it hits with starts off. It just starts off with the place and it just repeats the whole thing. Boom, boom, boom. It's just like it's just repeating where a solar power kind of goes through phases and doesn't end it. The whole thing is a crescendo that eventually like a wave breaking later in the song.

I think for me, it feels and again, I were I guess we're just sort of putting our fingers on the scale now. but it the the lord song to me bothers me a little bit because of the like whisper speakingness okay of like 75 of the song feels like the like it feels like the interlude of taylor swift songs where like you know the part that we all hate in a daydream right exactly it feels like that but for the entire beginning of the song it's just kind of like wow okay well come on white girl like steaming dumps on no not at all i like this on both of the what i think are going to be the

finalists i'm actually really glad we had this conversation actually because i don't think you know i'm not saying that like i'm right about this but it's kind of interesting to to yet think about these songs and and the fact that they're they're hitting our ears so differently is interesting to me so anyway i'm glad that they'll be happy whoever wins i'm glad that they're matching

up though in the semi-final instead of them matching up against other songs because i think Those would be the two final songs, and that would be a slightly less interesting than whatever it ends up being. All right. So people can go to tbtl.net and continue to vote. And I guess, Andrew, I like that we just do this scheduling now on the show. But how much time are we going to – do you have a sense of how much time we should give the next round? Or I guess the – yeah, there's two more rounds. There's this vote, and then there will be a final vote.

So I guess we probably – Yeah, we're doing all right. If we just want to hit it by the end of August for Song of the Summer, you guys want to give this like maybe more than a week? Maybe it's Tuesday now, maybe the rest of this week and all of next week, and then you can come back early the following and we can do it. So I'll get these polls up like today. So if you're listening to this right now, chances are if you go to tbtl.net slash song of the summer, I'll have the new voting polls up already waiting for you.

TBTL Breaking News. We have breaking news coming to us from Middle Earth. There is Lord of the Rings news. I don't actually know what it is because, David, you texted something to me and Andrew. I didn't click on the link. I don't know what's happening. And does it involve Hearthstone? Because Andrew was also texting about Hearthstone. I was very confused.

Leave the Hearthstone out of this.

Also, I don't know if this was the best song to pick, but it was Riders of Rohan. It was one of the more popular. It's a great. So when it really gets into it, it's a really, really good. and you sort of hear a great, like, string orchestra of, like, What about Samwise the Brave in honor of our bro and newly minted father, Samwise? Oh, congratulations. This is a great one, too. This one's very emotional. It gets very, like. Well, this is good because we're very emotional about Violet, our new niece. Little peanut Violet. Who's the cutest thing on earth. Congrats to Sam and Ashley for little Violet. So we're going to play Samwise the Brave in honor of our bro. Anyway, what is going on in Loaderland? So there has been a lot of talks in the last five or so years, maybe more than that, since basically the rights for Middle Earth adaptations was originally owned under the umbrella of New Line Cinemas. and I don't know if that was a greater if there was a greater studio or conglomerate that sort of that fell under the umbrella of but in the last decade So Peter Jackson didn't own it? No, not as far as I know Interesting Yeah, I think, well because he wasn't even going to work on the Hobbit films originally it was going to be Guillermo del Toro and then he sort of came in at the end of pre-production but um in the last decade or so uh the rights have been uh purchased or i don't know how it all works but basically amazon amazon prime has gotten the rights to uh make things under the name of tolkien and lord of the rings whoa amazon amazon uh obviously that company's going places Yeah, keep an eye on that. Space, actually. NASA, just for four minutes. NASA has scrubbed like two missions this week. Meanwhile, the space cowboy Jeff Bezos is up there. And so since that has happened, there's been tons of talk about what they're going to make. um everything seemed like all the signs pointed towards um the studio uh even before they hired any producers or directors or anything like that um that they were going to do something pre

lord of the rings era so basically middle earth um uh the lord of the rings happens within the third age of middle earth and there are two ages before that where like a bunch of stuff happens and a lot of that related to that yes so a lot of that is outlined in the still got it good job pronouncing it too uh and um so there hasn't been a ton of super definitive information about it we just all kind of assumed that it was going to be something from the first or second age um in the last year so actually a year ago they officially signed on directors and producers and a lot of different members of staff uh all of none of them except for two people were at all involved in uh any of the peter jackson adaptations so it's i'm sorry none of them were or most of so none of them were okay but except for two people one of them uh is this guy john howe who is a uh a celebrated uh illustrator and designer who did a ton of art for tolkien's books over the last like 60 years and he was the main along with this guy alan lee this guy john howe was uh one of the main um production designers for the uh lord of the rings trilogy and also the hobbit trilogy so it's huge that they have him because from a like visual standpoint his vision is a lot of what the vision of peter jackson's films were so the there's at least some confidence and optimism there that he will bring some of that uh image still over and so there was a um oh and the other guy is just a tolkien scholar this guy tom shippy who it'd be great if it was the guy He makes these sweet roles that you would die for. And so they came out with a sort of press release last year outlining who was going to be working on it. And then over the last year, a bunch of actors have surfaced who they're hiring for roles. None of them had any parts in any of the Lord of the Rings films. So I don't know what that means necessarily, if that's a good thing or a bad thing. But we've gotten sort of little pieces and chunks out of it, and there were rumors that it was going to be specifically the second age of Middle-earth was what they were going to be portraying. uh yesterday um they came out uh saying uh or not necessarily saying anything they came out with a the first production image basically which is this large um landscape image of what everyone is assuming is uh valinor which is um a land far to the west it's over the oceans of middle earth

So at the very end of the final film, you see Frodo and Bilbo and Gandalf all get into a boat and sail over the seas to what they call the Undying Lands. The Undying Lands is basically Valinor. And so we see an image of Valinor, and it's beautiful. You have all these waterfalls and, you know, cool architecture and stuff in this sort of large scale. uh i i think it would be it's it's uh sort of a map painting basically um and in the background which um is is what's sort of the cause for a lot of contention is you see uh these two one minion and they're playing happy guy pharrell in the background the guy with the steampunk glasses no but uh rabble rabble is that what they say yes yes it is i know for a fact but oh i see uh but there are two trees in the background um which are these fabled trees uh called uh laurelin and telperion which are the two trees of light basically one is the light of the moon one is the light of the sun and these are um trees that initially were the light source for all of middle earth basically they were these um amazing sort of light and life sources that were in valinor that gave i don't know there's a lot of like spirituality uh connected to it and what's funny about the uh intro clip of stephen colbert that andrew played is uh colbert mentions the two trees because the the thing about the two trees is at the end of the first age these trees die because Ungoliant who is um the sort of original real bad spider of middle earth Shelob is who we see in uh in the Lord of the Rings as sort of like the last remaining descendant of this giant spider Unguleant who is basically a representation of like a black hole. So...

this spider goes and eats and feeds on all the light of the trees um and kills the trees essentially uh and so a lot of people are wondering what this scene is depicting what this first image that we're seeing is depicting because um essentially the trees dying is what brings about the second age of middle earth and so we had heard rumors that it was going to be about

the second age look alive in the production still they do yeah they do so the question is is this an

image of like a prologue scene or of um a flashback or something um yeah there's just a lot of questions around it i've been texting with dad about it he's unsure um but we're both going to be and yet somehow he's already bit torrented the entire film um but it's actually it's going to be a tv show as a matter of fact uh so i don't know how many seasons it's gonna have i don't know what they're how much they're gonna diverge from the actual text the thing about the silmarillion is there's not a ton of like actual um dialogue or like you know hard content of like what the events are that that are lined out it's mostly like a bunch of names of elves and names of places so

Basically, there's a decent amount of creative license.

You just have the sort of starting point with these characters. Yes, which could be a good thing because if they have really good writers, then hopefully they can make a beautiful story out of it. But for a Tolkien sort of purist, it's like the only place they can go is down. Like this thing was not meant to be an adaptation. This is a bunch of notes and letters.

The thing they do is going to not fulfill the sort of plots and character development that people have written in their own minds because it's unwritten. So whatever they do, it's like, well, that isn't how I imagined that.

Yes, exactly. And I think what I'm coming to and what Dad is coming to as well is you just have to go into it knowing that it's gonna it's it's just uh slightly within the realm of of tolkien it's not canon yeah it's not canon necessarily um so yeah it's i don't know that's basically all

will we or will we not see grimly the pleasant because i feel like that's rich they're still

in pre-production so we gotta work our way in there they are filming in new zealand at least Parts of it So that is also good The landscapes will be somewhat Consistent Consistent Dad actually sent me a text Being like We've been I guess we gotta plan a new trip Oh, right I love it Which was very sweet I love it The fans online Oh, sorry I was just gonna say

You sent me these images yesterday It's like, you know One Instagram post With maybe like five photos You can scroll through And I clearly wasn't looking at it that closely I didn't get any of what I was just like Oh, that's a nice sunset Oh, no I see those are trees on fire But anyway And now I'm just like looking at the comments, the very first comment is very exciting from somebody who says, Valinor, the light of two trees. But after that, it all goes downhill. Immediately, Chloe is blooming, says, if this is an elf with short hair, I swear to God. Oh, huge red flag. Somebody else, they better not F this up. And then somebody says, I've been hurt so many times it's hard to be optimistic, but this particular photo looks amazing. I mean, these

sound like mariners fans well that's uh that's a group of fans who jerry depoto just traded aragorn well i mean this is a bunch of fans who had to sit through upwards of 12 hours of hobbit films yeah which included a romance between uh a dwarf and an elf who never existed um so you know

we've been hurt well i have to say as a uh as a person who is clearly on the far outside of the fandom of this whole thing although i did enjoy like you know the first movies i think of the first three like peter jackson movies as being kind of like the original ones they are yeah i like this idea i mean i'm sure it would drive me crazy if i were in your shoes or dad's shoes but like i kind of like a reboot because i've already lost track of like everyone like if they can almost make this like a game of thrones type of thing where it's like it just starts i don't

mean they have to have sean bean in it although well but they do have set there's at least like three writers who were writers on game of thrones who are now going to be uh in in production of

this because if it just is almost like okay a new thing and it's happening in middle earth but i don't know all the characters and i don't have to remember like which thing happened where it's just like a new intriguing really well shot hopefully well acted and produced thing that like i said as some kind of love child of Game of Thrones.

And Lord of the Rings. I could definitely get into that.

What I worry about a lot with it is there's not a ton of, like, action that goes on within the Silmarillion. There is a ton of context and, like, history of what is going on. And so my big worry is they're not going to want to do the necessary exposition to explain all of this complicated nonsense around the elves and stuff. And so they're going to take they're going to cut corners and take, you know, certain liberties with it that I think will tarnish the sort of essence of it. Like that was the thing with the Lord of the Rings films is they were not not every single thing that happens in the book happens in the films. But the sort of like core mythology around it, they do a really good job of summarizing that and putting it in little pieces throughout the films so that it's not one huge piece of exposition that you have to, you know, first listen to or read before you have an understanding of why these lineages and why these characters and why, you know, certain races are all all communicate with each other the way that they communicate. And I don't think there is a really good way to do that in a film or TV adaptation because it's just so dense and there's so many games.

Although TV is probably better because you can do eight-hour-long episodes instead of a three-hour movie. So maybe that would give a little hope. Very true. Well, I'm excited to see what they get up to. And if you would like to hear even more extremely informed Lord of the Rings talk, you can, I think, can people still get the riff track that we did? Not David, but can other people still get the riff track?

Oh, yeah. Anybody but David, actually. Anybody who donated to this show during the last TV Telethon should have gotten a link. If you are one of those people and you didn't get a link, hit me up. You didn't.

Just call David on one of his jobs. Just call David. He'll bootleg it for you. Narrate it while he's doing it.

Or email me, andrew at tbtl.net.

Okay. Davey, thank you so much for being here. Yeah, absolutely. It's always fun to see you. This is the main way we hang out as brothers. Do you have any Lord of the Rings?

I have like Misty Mountain Hop by Led Zeppelin or Greta Van Fleet. Oh, my God.

Dude, speaking of TikTok, Greta Van Fleet has now been sort of like meme-based. Well, you can't quite tell. Well, there's this clip where the lead singer is being sort of extra in his performance. And so the meme on TikTok is people duet it, and then they do their impression. because he's being so rock starry where he's looking off into the distance and everything. He's on a stage at SNL or something. So I love that because it feels like it's roasting these guys. But then there's also a whole other thing of people being like, hey, this band sounds like Led Zeppelin. And I'm like, no shit, Sherlock. Where were you three years ago when I was in Austin freaking out because they were about to play Stubbs. And I had talked to two young women at the lunch counter who were there for Greta Van Fleet. And then I went back to the hotel and listened to them. I was like, WTF.

It's Led Zeppelin, and they claim that they never knew Led Zeppelin. Anyway, what do you got, David?

Well, not anything Lord of the Rings related, but I do have, there's a new song. So Leon Bridges, who's famous for many acts collaborating with Krongbin, being one of them. He came out with a new album called, I think, Gold Diggers Hits or something. And there's a song called Steam, which is really good. That's been a nice jam. I'm excited. And I don't think there's any bad language or anything in it. That's cool.

Well, I was on the bus the other day, and there was a young woman, like I'm going to say a college-age student on the bus, and she had clearly just gone to a record store, and she was holding a Krongbin vinyl. And I was just like, you're the coolest person I know.

Krongbin's the perfect thing to get on vinyl, too. I know.

I wanted to give her kind of like this knowing Krongbin look, but I couldn't figure out what the look was, and I figured I should stop making faces at this young woman. Sure. Just to be safe. Yeah.

All right. So we'll go out with this little Leon Bridges. And, well, we'll be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you. So please do join us for that. Until then, have a great Tuesday. Stay safe. Go Mariners. And please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

We'll be right back. Don't be at yourself, man. You got the keys. You know, you know you gotta hold on me.

Give me the battle tool.

Power out.