Muse

If it's a no-bones day, I just stay in bed Noodle said it's fine if I don't get dressed His legs are made of jello Sorry you didn't get the memo Cause Noodle said that it was okay Noodle said that it was quite alright If I don't leave my house all night It's a no-bones day

TBTL I don't know, maybe part of it's the fact that you're in a hurry you've grown up on instant orange juice flip a dial instant entertainment dial seven digits instant communication my face your face instant face go go talk to whoever you want that does

that stuff i don't know wow you know so much about technology we may have created a monster in the lab it's not a monster it's a cyborg that can kill without remorse it's not great it's fantastic you totally undersold it the pageantry the costumes wow you better finish up that vacuuming i'm gonna have a hot mic in a minute let's blow some tiny minds all right

hello good morning and welcome everyone to a thursday edition of tbtl the show that just might be too beautiful to live if only we were trapped in a castle in the middle of winter with nowhere to go my name is luke burbank i am your host i'm like seriously excited i'm kind of shy but mostly excited coming to you from the nest broadcast center high in the sky above portland oregon where i uh i just want to apologize in advance they're working on one of the elevators and it turns out whatever is broken on the elevator sits on a behind a wall that is also a wall of my apartment if that makes any sense one of the walls of this place which i will only live in for about three more days, is the back of the elevator shaft, and it's apparently right where they're working, and so you will hear a lot of construction noise throughout this episode. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. Try and stop it.

Bang, bang.

So just be ready for that, and be ready for this. It's episode 3,542 in a collector's series. Let the fun begin. if you're buying face paint in uruguay and you notice that the model on the packaging of the face paint looks like bj novak from the office um look at this face what do you see it is there's a story behind how bj novak's face ended up all over a bunch of random products in various parts of the world we'll tell you about that also some schools are banning their students from dressing up as characters from squid games you play to win the game uh for halloween uh because uh squid games is a pretty violent show and they don't want to promote that so we will uh figure out what's going on with all of that also i saw a movie last night so who needs a movie in a theater which was exciting was the french dispatch starring one timothy chalamet all men is trash except me and timothy shabla goo uh i'll give you a uh a detailed uh film review of that because that's really what people come to this show for uh also because it's a thursday aka blurs day we'll do the blurs day messages we will do all of that with the help of this young man the longest running cobro of the show may be best known for his depictions of the tall ships he is andrew walsh and he's joining me right now from the roosevelt neighborhood of seattle washington Good morning, my friend.

Good morning, Luke. I start the show today with a bit of a pickle. No, not with, but in a bit of a pickle.

Okay.

Prepositions matter.

Mm-hmm.

I have something that I really want to talk to you about, but I also realize it makes...

Is it a brains or no brains day? Well, that's the thing.

Okay. That's not really the thing. I have something that I want to talk to you about that I think would be kind of interesting to chat about here, but it also would make very good newsletter content, and today is the day that I start staring down that newsletter deadline. So I kind of don't want to blow it all here, which is a weird thing to do, because podcasts should come before newsletters. But let me just say this in all seriousness. I cannot remember a time I've gotten more feedback via text messages, tweets, emails, all the different ways on a topic we've talked about on TBTL. more than the conversation you and I had yesterday trying to come up with a part of a vehicle, a car that starts with the letter J. I have had people blowing up my phone all day yesterday. It's fantastic. Some people have some good suggestions, but here's the controversy. People are upset with me because I said that jumper cables do not count as part of a car. That was something that you suggested.

They're upset with you because you were being mean to me yesterday. That's really what it comes down to.

I don't think I was being mean. Luke, know your place. That was me being mean.

You were decrying the darkness. I was lighting a torch, and you were snobbing.

buffing it out. I was trying to come up with a car part that begins with the letter J. You suggested jumper cables. I said, that's not part of a car. That's a tool. Same with a jack. But I'm getting a lot of emails from people and messages saying, listen, Andrew, you said floor mats are part of a car. Floor mats are no more part of a car than jumper cables or a jack, which are accessories. So, okay, fine. I get rid of floor mats. Fan belt. Okay. Fan belt. We'll replace floor mats with fan belt. Let's reject the floor mats. Let's reject the jacks and the jumper cables. All right. Are we all on the same page now?

I feel you wouldn't be doing this if you hadn't thought of fan belt.

I had fan belt. I already had fan belt locked and loaded before I even brought it up on TBTL because I've been playing this game for a while, and sometimes I like to go back and forth between fan belt and floor mat. I used floor mat yesterday as an example of me saying, like, it can be any part of a car. I thought I was being kind of magnanimous is the wrong word. I thought I was being generous there. But, no, it just blew up in my face. And, you know, I'm not apologizing here, but I'm correcting my course.

Did anyone have any Jay suggestions that you hadn't thought of that weren't jumper cables? Yeah, there's something called a junction box.

I was getting a lot of junction boxes. I'm kind of blowing the newsletter here. That's okay. A lot of people are saying jockey box.

But that tail really wags this dog, doesn't it?

Well, I mean.

Starting Monday, it becomes the main thing that stresses you out about your job on this podcast. It does matter. Well, listen. I recorded the hay dummies yesterday while driving to see the French Dispatch.

Yeah, I thought it was pretty good. I thought it was a good hay dummy. So it's not too late to sign up if you're listening to this on a Thursday to see Friday's newsletter.

I will say, and I said this in the video, I'm concerned that there will be some blowback That I was videotaping myself while driving But I want to just I said it in the video but I'll say it here as well I was never looking at the camera While the car was moving So at a stoplight I addressed the camera And noticed just how tremendously unflattering The camera angles were in this thing But I was never looking at the camera Or my phone I should say while driving I just want to be very clear about it

Why were you shirtless?

That's how I see movies

That's right you were on the way to see the movies We should actually have started with that. What did you think of The French Dispatch? Here we are, Luke, a couple of fellas. That movie's only been out for like four or five days now, and we've both seen it. Like a couple of cultural critics with our fingers on the pulse.

I loved it.

Great.

I absolutely loved it. It exceeded my expectations. You did me a real kindness by talking about how the movie kind of had no emotional component.

Not no, but, you know, I didn't say no. there are some moments but it hints at emotion i would say right i guess you did me a favor by kind

of again i don't think you were trying to bash the movie i think you enjoyed the movie but by sort of helping me manage my expectations because you know i like wes anderson and i like all of the actors in that film yeah so it was and i like the new yorker so it's like huh what are all the things that uh that luke tends to like coming together and so it could have suffered from me having too high of expectations but they were managed just so it also helped that i had three martinis before i saw it becca and i went and got some dinner before and posted up at a place across the street and i thought you know this is this is the right amount of martinis to see a wes anderson film because it just kind of put me in a slightly loopy state so i was very i was like in exactly the right headspace for it and it was just fun being in a theater and also the movie was great I loved it. The Lieutenant Nescafe, the character who's, I guess, law enforcement slash chef towards the end of the film. I don't want to give anything away, but Lieutenant Nescafe does something very brave and had what I thought was the line of the film when he's talking to Jeffrey Wright's character. And he says, I wasn't brave. I just didn't feel like disappointing people today.

Yeah, that's a great line.

I was like, I wonder how often when people do things that are extraordinary, it's just because they didn't want to let people down. It was more just like, God, I didn't want everyone to be mad at me. So I, you know, so I dove on that, you know, grenade or whatever. Like how much of bravery is just I didn't feel like letting people down today. That's a great. That was a genius line.

I think that's probably my favorite story. You know, and I think we can talk about this. I have a question, a legit question that I alluded to earlier this week that now that you've seen the movie, I'm going to ask you. And I'm going to try to do this in a way that both is inclusive to people who haven't seen the movie and won't see it. But also, I promise you, like, I'm very sensitive to spoilers. This isn't nothing is going to kind of spoil.

It's also not that kind of film. Yeah. I mean, yes. Timothy Shablugu has been dead the entire film. So I guess I kind of ruin that one.

That's not true. OK, so I have a question for you. So like I said, and I might not even be right. Maybe other people would just disagree with my.

assessment that it this movie sort of holds emotion at arm's length certainly that it's it's very it's very delicate and it's very precious and it's all these things and I like those things I would see this again by the way this is not like me panning it but it doesn't have it doesn't have tons of heart and soul it I think at times tries to get there and at times I think also withholds but all of that is to say there is a moment near the end of that short story for those who are unfamiliar this is kind of a there are several it's like it's trying to recreate the magazine experience so there are several kind of short stories in this with some interludes and they also kind of break down the fourth wall so after the movie sort of tells you one of these little stories you will then kind of um you will see the editors sort of in the editing room or a quick conversation between the editor who's played by bill murray and the and the person the editor of the magazine i should mention not the film exactly of this of this magazine that they all work for a story will be told and then you'll be maybe in the writer's room and then bill murray as the editor will be talking to the to the writer of that story and saying maybe giving some feedback and after the story with jeffrey wright uh the one that you just alluded to about this this chef who is a police officer um bill murray gets to the end of the piece he's like reading the the script or whatever in his hand and he gets to the or maybe not the script but he's reading the the the pages in his hand and he gets to the end and he says you know the main character here doesn't have have many lines and Jeffrey Wright says well there's there were some lines that I took out here and he uncrumples a piece of paper from the garbage can and says this is the part that I took out and and then we sort of see that play out and it's kind of gives the story a different twist a different kind of ending and a different flavor maybe I should say and Bill Murray says this is the best part this is the this is the emotional core of this story and jeffrey writes like i couldn't disagree more so um and i was wondering and i hope that's i i really don't think that's a spoiler that should not take away the enjoyment of this film at all even though i'm telling you something that happens kind of in an interstitial at the end but i hope you just trust me on that dear listener but my question for you luke is do you think that was a meta statement do you think that that little exchange was wes anderson sort of talking to us the listener saying i realized that I have thrown away some of the more emotional impact stuff that I could have included in this movie but it's like it's a way of both saying it and not saying it at the same time

wow that's a great question that first of all did not occur to me as a thought at all last night it being Wes Anderson I could I could sort of believe that because he is a very he's very brainy and and you know I could see him putting that in as a meta statement i will tell you that it went right over my head if that's what he was doing yeah and i'm

not sure if i'm right about that or i just that was kind of my thought as i was watching the whole movie i'm like you're just kind of you're getting kind of you know it's you're kind of getting close to emotion and again i think wes anderson can do it some of his and i i think that it's a choice that he makes i don't think that he's blind to these things i think sometimes he wants to create little like genevieve said and i repeated the other day you know like this is like a really really beautiful intricate dollhouse sort of um and you know he makes other movies that have a little bit more narrative a little bit more depth a little bit more emotional punch i think that i don't think the these things are blind to him i think they're decisions that he's making

also how great was tilda swinton oh great yeah i've never i don't think i've ever heard tilda

swinton with an american accent oh yeah good call yeah and she's doing uh she's almost doing a barbara walters at times did you get a little bit of that it was so genius though like that

that whole part so tilda swinton plays i guess you would say sort of an art historian slash art critic slash art patron of this particular artist played by benicio del toro who's incarcerated and doing this very kind of uh you know sort of uh what would you call it outsider art outsider art but i i feel like having you know having at one time been married to an installation artist and having been around a lot of art stuff and and then also having now done a lot of like high-end galas and events where wealthy people are bidding on art i know exactly that person who tilda swinton is portraying and the fact that the the museum ends up being in kansas is also kind of a thing like you will have sometimes somebody with a lot of money and a lot of love for art just happens to live in kansas or like i think of you know the the walton family which are the sam walton was the founder of walmart uh you know that happened in a town called Bentonville Arkansas and one of his daughters is a real art fan and so she has this there's this gallery called Crystal Bridges in of all places Bentonville Arkansas it just has incredible art in it but it's in Arkansas you know and I say that with peace and love to Danny and our other listeners kicking it down there on the Razorback State but um

Thank you.

That just everything about that Tilda Swinton character delighted me because I've bumped into a version of that of that person. It's so specific. I love that that, you know, that they wrote that character.

Yeah. Again, this is the type of movie that now that I've seen it once, I would watch it again and I would even watch it again on the small screen. I don't have a lot of patience for watching full length movies at home these days because I've as I'd like to tell Genevieve, I'm a very dynamic TV watcher, which just means I get up and I fidget a lot.

I did have a moment, by the way, watching the film last night Where I thought, we haven't even gotten to the Jeffrey Wright stuff here And I was enjoying the heck out of seeing the movie But yeah, I'm not used to sitting in a theater for two plus hours anymore

But I will say, and again, it's not that I'm comparing these two movies Because there's no reason to compare them Other than I happened to see them both in the same weekend And they both came out at the same time And they both have Timothy, what is it? Shalemug? What did the guy say?

All men is trash, except me and Timothee Chablagoo.

Chablagoo. That's one of those things where I'm going to say Chablagoo.

Your actor's new name is Chablagoo.

I'm going to forget that it's Chalamet. Give me a month on that. Give me less than that. I was going to say, but I really want to watch Dune again, but I don't want to watch that on the small screen because I don't have a great setup. I have a couple of quasi-modern TVs in my house, meaning that they're not tube TVs.

Meaning they're not from a Wes Anderson film? Yeah, right. Meaning you're not what's-her-name from Tenenbaums watching it while sitting in the bathtub. Oh, Margot. Gwyneth Paltrow.

Yeah. But anyway, I want to see Dune again, but I want to see Dune in the theater again. And the funny thing is it's like you and I were talking on this show about some directors kind of being upset that their films are being released on HBO on the small screen and the big screen at the same time. and whether or not that is hurting, you know, kind of hurting the business or what have you. Without getting into that whole debate, because I don't know that I have a strong opinion on it, I just know what I like. And, like, for me to watch Dune at home, like, maybe if I have to remember, like, I saw that they just greenlit Dune 2. What are you doing here? There you go.

They've greenlit my tweet, by the way. I'm in development. David from the basement sent me a, apparently there's a meme that has, It's like the characters from the Shrek universe overlaid on the Dune poster, and it's, what do you Dune here? Oh, yes. It's very Scottish.

Well, that's funny because I saw one with groundskeeper Willie that said, if you're in, I can't remember the lyrics to the song Downtown, but then it ends with, Dune Tune. Okay, I don't know what I was going to say. Anyway, I really like Dune, but I don't want to watch that on the small screen. Maybe if I go to see the sequel and I need to remind myself what happens, I would go back and do that. But if people are at all into sci-fi, and the Dune thing for me might have been kind of like you going into the French Dispatch. Like, I just had no expectations going into Dune other than, like, I hope the popcorn's good. Like, I just – What are you doing here? I didn't know anything about it. I was like, I don't know. We'll go see this movie with my friends. And it ended up being, like, really, really good. So I'm actually thinking about going back to see that.

Are they making a Dune 2? Because I saw Shablaugu tweeting about that.

Yeah, that was announced yesterday, I think, that he announced it.

They're already making Dune 2.

Well, they greenlit it. That was the big news. I see Yeah Which I assumed I didn't know that I just kind of assumed That they were They were going into this Knowing that it was Going to be a multi-film thing But I guess nothing Is stable these days Or nothing is guaranteed

Yeah and I guess you're right I mean it only makes sense I assume that the movie Is doing really well At the box office And so Now that they've got The you know The green light Because that's the only way To make money anymore In films it would seem Is to you know Basically create A franchise of films I'm going to see Dune as well Maybe not this, maybe this weekend, I don't know But I'm like, I'm, and I think we might go see Last Night in Soho Which is getting rave reviews I'm a movie watching fool Give me three martinis in a movie, Andrew

Three martinis in a movie Well, I hope I didn't, I have my new

Film review podcast I'm doing

I do hope that I didn't now over Hype Dune, because one of the reasons I loved it Was because I didn't know that I was going into something that What are you doing here? Other people had been really anticipating You know, I had an interesting experience We went to see Dune on Friday night. It's, you know, our friends got the tickets. It was, you know, there were people in the theater. It didn't seem overly crowded or anything. Then Saturday afternoon, Vives and I go to a different theater to see the French Dispatch. And we have to wait in this huge long line to get in because all these college students were going to see Dune. I mean, I'd never seen a, this is at Thornton Place for those familiar, like the line to get in after you bought your tickets, the line to get in was wrapped around the building. And I realized, I think they have that 4DX thing there where, like, the seats. Oh, what is that? Okay, so you got your 3D, right? Is this another D? And this adds another D to it. And, like, your seats will rumble and fans will blow.

on you, and I think if somebody farts in the movie, you smell it in the theater. I'm not exactly sure of all the details. Smell-O-Vision. That was

a thing, by the way, they tried in, I think, the 70s. Smell-O-Vision. I think they

might have what's the word? Not oral, but... Olfactory. Olfactory. I think I just did that to you on Monday. Thank you again for telling me the word olfactory. I think there is an olfactory aspect of this as well. No joke. And fans and spritzing things. I have never experienced that. It does not sound like something that would enhance the movie to me. Do you know

That I learned how to drive in the parking Lot that Became Thornton Creek Movie theater etc That was the site of Much environmental debate because there Actually is a Thornton Creek And it runs through there and that used to just Be a gigantic parking lot Adjacent to Northgate Mall and my uncle Mike Let me drive his car In that huge parking lot Which then they were trying to turn into this You know kind of movie theater And apartments and restaurants Development they were trying to do that for Like years and years and years and they were always Getting thwarted because of Thornton Creek and what it fed into the Watershed etc so it's funny To think that it they got they got it they Ran it through and you got to see Dune Or the French Dispatch I should say yeah there In Thornton Creek yeah well I'm glad

You saw that movie let's let's keep our cultural Criticism up Luke maybe we can come

Back I didn't know I know this is a first For us that we're talking about anything even of remotely timely on this program.

And the fact that you and I both saw it. You know what I mean? One of us might see something and not the other. So what is The Last Night in Soho? Is this the movie you're talking about? I didn't know about this.

Yeah, it has the actor Anna Joy Taylor, I think, or Taylor Joy. She was from The King's Gambit. The Queen's Gambit, I should say. And I think it's kind of a psychological thriller, which I usually like movies where people I don't think it's really a horror film I think like I said it's a psychological thrill I'm not a big horror film person I just don't find that kind of content particularly interesting yeah um but this one's getting rave reviews and uh so I figured why not again three martinis in a movie man I'm like I'm down it was so much fun uh it was really nice to feel like some of some elements of normal life are returning of course we had to show our Vax cards and we were masked and everything but it was it was great I really enjoyed it all right let's take a quick break and then we come back we'll talk about what's going on with BJ Novak's face and do the blurs days I guess we have a kind of a lot of blurs days today so we had a couple of light weeks which was nice but now we're just getting back to I mean this is it's blurs day season as you know right so a lot of people celebrating a lot of people celebrating their blurs days this week so we'll do all that coming up here on TBTL.

Alright, let's thank some donors

of the day. These are the people making today's episode possible with their monthly donation.

Can I just jump in here and apologize really quickly? If it seemed like the fade on that music there as you were talking was a little bit herkier and jerkier than usual, I was sneezing, actively sneezing twice in a row while fading out the music so i wanted you to know that because number one i'm a professional look it up in the book but also wanted you to let you let you know that don't don't get used to that shoddy workmanship i was just dealing with something i had to sneeze the

other day in public and it was indoors i was masked and i was terrified i was terrified of sneezing into the mask because that's gross but also terrified that people were gonna think I had the Rona like you know and same thing with coughing anytime I'm manifesting even the slightest sign of possibly being unwell in public it stresses me I think I was on the airplane and I was like I was between those two evangelicals who were passing their bible verses back and forth it was amazing there was like an older couple and the wife would look up a bible verse on her phone and I say this with peace and love we have a lot of listeners who are people of faith and I But, again, that's something that adds to your life. I totally support it. But she would look up a Bible verse on her phone, and then she would hand it past me to her husband. Then he would look at it and nod approvingly and then hand it back to her.

It was like, you guys got to know what's in this Bible at this point. You were just looking down, and you could see the phone? Or were they then discussing it?

Yeah, it was also, no, they weren't discussing it much. And it was in, like, very large font. You know what I mean? Because these were not young people. yeah um anyway william galleon is in kenmore washington and is supporting the program today thank you william then we've got aaron and dave goulay in edmonds washington it's a good day very It sure is.

That's what I say.

Zach Hofstad is in—you know what? I'll take it. I'll absolutely take it. Zach Hofstad is in Tumwater, Washington. Thank you, Zach. Heather Trapp is in Red Lodge, Montana. Sounds scary. Does sound like it could be the basis or the home of a Stephen King novel.

It does, yeah, right? Red Lodge, Montana.

I feel like he could set an entire book in Red Lodge, Montana. Be careful out there, Heather. Yeah, keep your head on a swivel. Heather, if you write a book and you have like a super fan, just really beware because you could have a misery situation on your hands. Sarah Krasminski is in Pittsburgh, PA, a yinzer out there in Pittsburgh. And I have to say, I don't want to profile Pittsburgh, but I feel like Krasminski is a very Pittsburgh last name.

Yeah, you know, it's interesting.

I mean, it strikes me as a very Polish American last name, but it seems like it really works for Pittsburgh.

Yeah, I don't have a Polish last name, but I have a lot of, you know, all of my background is Eastern European and a bunch of it is Polish. And it's funny. I was somewhere this weekend where I was talking to another person who I think she comes from another Midwestern state, kind of like Ohio. And her last name is Linsky or something like that. And we're talking about our chuchas and our bopsies. And it's just like, yeah, there's there's the Eastern European thing, but there's also the Midwestern Eastern European thing.

So that's what you consider Pittsburgh to be Midwest.

That's I mean, a lot of people. I mean, I can't answer that, Luke. I'm still getting heat on the floor mat thing. I feel like Ohio is even an edge case for a lot of people. And then I think that Pennsylvania, I think that becomes too far east. But then it really does become like where do you categorize it then? It's not mid-Atlantic. It's not the northeast.

When is mid-October I think is the real question.

That's right. You know what? This just came up on Levitard and not to steal their deal. But I think they even put it on the pole, Guillermo. They said – somebody made the argument that Pittsburgh cannot be the Northeast because – or Pennsylvania cannot be the Northeast because if someone in your conference is in West Virginia, you cannot consider yourself a Northeastern school is the ruling that they came down with. Does that make sense?

So it's like by extension. Yeah. So it's not even where you are geographically located. It's where other teams in your conference are.

Exactly. If your conference can, I think, I mean, it would be on Twitter somewhere, but I think the poll question was, if your conference contains West Virginia, can you say that your school is in the Northeast? And it seemed like most of the cast of characters said no.

I'm wondering if I'm misremembering this, but I feel like there was a period of time where the Atlanta Falcons were in the NFC West or the AFC West.

One of those weird expansion things, because Dallas is in a weird division, right?

Yeah, there was something where it was – or maybe it was the Rams. Maybe it was when they were the St. Louis Rams. Louis. They were definitely in – they were in the NFC West. But, yeah, there was a period of time where I think the Falcons might have been in a Western conference, which just seemed sort of crazy to me. I remember when I flew to Ohio – well, I was ultimately ending up in Ohio, but the part of Ohio that is like almost Pittsburgh, I think I might have flown into Pittsburgh and then drove. I was doing a story about surprise weddings And the surprise wedding Was in kind of rural Ohio And I just remember being So confused because I think of Ohio As being like oh it's like Chicago It's the Midwest it's like a Three and a half hour flight You know you get over there it's no big deal And it was like it took me like a day of travel To get to this part of Ohio And I remember thinking this is not the Midwest This feels extremely far east

Yeah and you were on the east side too i think you were in were you in illyria or not illyria no i was it starts with a g we actually

have a listener who lives there right and it's not giardia because who would name a town after a intestinal parasite but it's like it's geaga is that a place oh geaga it was geaga county i think geaga county yeah but i can't remember and it was a park in geaga county and i don't remember what

the lima maybe lima that is a town in ohio i gotta say speaking of intestinal distress and i know Are you whispering because you don't want Genevieve to hear this? No, no, she's not even here, but I don't want the listeners to hear it. I'm sitting here doing the donors of the day, which we have one more to thank here. Kathleen Manley of Seattle, Washington.

Wow, you're the Gino Smith of this operation.

Because I don't want the comment I'm going to make to be sandwiched in between the thank yous. So thank you to Kathleen and everybody for donating. And now I'm going to tell you that. Okay, hold on. Let me just do this. Is this a top story? Yes, it is.

When you start whispering about tummy troubles, that's a top story to me.

Okay. Can you give me the sounder again? You still have it there? I'm going to do this right. Hello and welcome to Top Story. Good evening. Today our top story is my cat has gas. Whoa. I'm sitting here doing the donors of the day with you. My cat is silently sleeping behind me, as you have seen and witnessed IRL yourself many times now, Luke. The word was F-A-R-T. And, like, I'm just talking to you, having a grand old time. And just now, moments ago, the room just filled with a stench. This happened a couple of nights ago with him, too. I mean, it will happen from time to time. And he's a big cat, so everything he does is, you know, he doesn't do anything in half measures.

I want it right into my butthole. And it doesn't, I mean, I realize I brought this up, but I'll talk over that truck. I've been dying to use that truck for like two years.

Dude, it is awful. And he did it in two different rooms the other night. I walked into my office where he was sleeping in the evening. And I was playing my baseball video game, my damn video game in the other room. I walk into my studio and it reeks. And he's not like agitated at all. He's just sleeping and farting. I'm like, oh my God, man. So I bring one of the candles we have lit out in the other room and I put it in the room. This is why you had 20 candles going the other day. Then, I don't know, 20 minutes later, he gets sick of sleeping in this room. He sees I'm playing my video game in the other room. He comes into that room with me. He snuggles up on the couch next to me on the red blanket, falls asleep. I'm playing my video game, listening to my podcast, minding my own business. All of a sudden, it is like mustard gas in the whole room again. I'm like, God damn it, Theo. And I have not changed.

So far, the evidence is uncontradicted that the president used taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat an election.

Oh, my God. That's something called Fartgate.

Sorry. Oh, my God. I don't think I know about that.

That's like a conservative commentator who appeared to fart on live television while trying to – actually, I don't know the person's political background. But the question was, did this person fart while appearing on some kind of television program? Seems too well mic'd.

I feel like Chris, so far, the evidence is uncontradicted that the president used taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat an election.

Yeah, so he does stop, though, almost like I can't imagine that that would I think you'd be so focused when being when on national television that I don't think anyone is comfortable enough to let one rip like that. It was probably just the chair, right? Yeah, I have a drop about chairs making weird noises. I don't know.

Well, some chairs make weird noises. Who is that? That voice sounds...

That's freaks and geeks. That's from you, by the way. You gave it to me years ago. Huh.

Oh, I don't remember that.

So has Theo always had this problem, or is this just part of having an older cat?

I think that it's getting... I mean, again, I have a sample size of about three farts over three days, so maybe it's not... Maybe I need to continue to do my research or hopefully not.

Isn't there a slanket somewhere you should be filling with your farts?

But I don't know. It's just it seems like it's increased recently, which you often will see this with a change in diet, which we haven't really changed his diet that much. He's been – I'm giving him kind of – this is boring. Whatever. I used to feed him twice a day in half a can of food in the morning and the afternoon. I'm sorry, in the morning and evening. Now I'm giving him like kind of a midday snack because like we don't have to watch his weight anymore. He's almost 21 years old. If the cat's hungry, I'm going to feed him. Gets a little complicated because then the professor bananas is like, why aren't you feeding me? And I'm like, you can lick the spoon if you want. She's like, OK, but that's not the same thing. Anyway, it's a whole thing. But I do wonder if maybe the extra meals I've been giving him is just like I don't know what it is. But he's been eating the same food for years now. But he is gassing up the place. If if I disappear on you during the show, either I went to get a candle or I died from inhalation.

That's that's pretty gross.

Yeah. Sorry.

What I try to not think, no, what I try to not think of when I smell something like that, like I was on my jog the other day and somebody had gone number two on the, you know, on the path, which is actually fairly common, but it was a real doozy. And I could tell that this wasn't a, it's a real doozy. And I could tell that it was not, it was not from like a dog or something. Like it just had the it had the look of being a human feces or as for some reason, Howard Stern calls it feces, which makes me laugh every time it was human feces. And I started to smell it and it was so outdoors. Obviously, it was just so just gross. And and and.

And it smelled really bad. And then I started to think, you know, when you're smelling something, it's because tiny particles of that thing inside of your nose, which is why I'm not a fan of people farting around each other. Because if I'm smelling and of course, I don't blame Theo. He's you know, he's just as God made him. But if you're smelling a fart or smelling a deuce that somebody dropped on the sidewalk in Portland, you're smelling it, meaning tiny particles of it are going into your nose.

You are the not. You are the fart. Exactly. Exactly. What's happening there? Yeah. I mean, that's one that's one way to think about it. I wanted to mention one quick thing, just like I was out ahead on something. I think I can take credit for this. Maybe you'll say that you've been saying it before me. But I had mentioned that a couple of weeks ago, I mentioned that it just seems like people are letting their dogs just poop on the on the sidewalk and in the tree lawns more and just leaving it there. Somebody wrote into The Stranger The Stranger brought back Alt Weekly here in Seattle They brought back a recurring column Recently where I can't remember what it's called but people are just like I think it's called I Anonymous where you write in and you

I wrote into I Anonymous once when I was in college

You call somebody out You anonymous Hey to the person in the coffee shop Who took off your shoes and put your feet Up on the table while you're reading your Charles Dickens not cool man or whatever well this one was just about somebody this is more of a broad stroke i anonymous maybe it's like we anonymous just saying that like people in whatever neighborhood in seattle this is this writer was just saying that's like why are we suddenly surrounded by dog poop have we just as a society given up on picking up after our dogs and our theory was

that our generation grew up stepping in a lot of dog poop and it was gross i felt like it was a huge part of my childhood and so we are very pro people picking up after their dogs and made it you know kind of shamed people and there's lots of signs around and lots of you know poop bags and such but maybe the generations that have grown up again i don't want to it's not really fair to blame people of a younger generation this is just my theory that maybe if you grew up in a relatively dog free uh dog poop free world then maybe it wasn't as important to you uh to to really like make sure that you pick up after your dog or we've just become a terrible terrible people as a group

of all ages yeah i mean and i i'm also wondering if there's if it has something to do with people's behavior during the pandemic and i don't i don't have any strong theories on that but just like kind of like just being just being overwhelmed and just being like maybe the things that start to fray at the ends are i don't want to bend over and pick up my dog's poop right now i don't know

man yeah um speaking of dogs let's do this real quick there's a new noodle the pug video that's up this is jonathan graciano by the way do you know the name of the the account the tiktok account that that that we started the show with that song that that no bones song so yeah that person credit

as well you know what my computer's frozen on me now but i'll have it in one second because i wrote

it down okay so uh we're gonna find out together if we're having a bones day or a no bones day this is noodle the pug will noodle the pug stand up or not today good morning everyone and welcome

back to yet another round of no bones the game where we find out if my 13 year old pug woke up with bones and as a result we find out what kind of day we're gonna have now i know he looks pretty mushy right here the yeah okay the yawn is misleading but he comes alive in the country i swear it oh and he stands oh look at him oh my god noodle i kind of knew it was going to be a bones day i felt it in my bones okay you guys pre-halloween bones day you know what that means you got to buy the king-size candy go get the king-size candy get it for yourself and get it for the kids you'll blow them away go on a hayride go on a hayride if you can't and you know what i just got to say it buy the tv you want the damn tv just buy the tv you got to treat yourself today

why are hayrides so fun i went to a pumpkin patch with becca a few weeks ago and we did the hayride out to where the pumpkins were and i thought why is this the most fun way to ride somewhere Hmm.

That's interesting. I haven't been on a hayride since I was a child, and it wasn't – even growing up in the country, it wasn't a huge part of growing up. I feel like I've been on one or two, but I don't think I'm the right person to – I mean, I remember them being fine. Just generally speaking, they were fine. But, you know, I was a kid. Really? I mean, it's been 30 years since I've been on a hayride.

You know what I think we need to get rid of? I feel like this is the time for me to really lay down a spicy take on this show. That's what Theo just did. I think they need to get rid of those horse-drawn carriages in Central Park for a few reasons. One, I don't think the horses love it. There's actually been, not to go to a dark place with this, but actually...

There have been people who are, you know, quite concerned about animal welfare who have made videos and taken pictures of horses that are working on those carriages, pulling those carriages that appear to be injured or not doing well, which seems bad. But also it reeks like I had a really nice time jogging in Central Park last week. But there are places where I don't know if they've just like they've thrown the poop into the grass or something. I mean, first of all, it's just smashed down in a bunch of places like there's something. that's supposed to catch it but sometimes it doesn't so there will be you know horse droppings that will end up on the running path like this paved kind of middle this paved road that goes around the kind of interior of central park and then thousands of carriages will drive over and it'll just get smashed down and it really smells bad and then there's wherever they're throwing it also it smells bad like it was really stinking up central park and again i just don't think it's great for the horses i feel like i know you want to go on a romantic thing there's got to be something better than those horse-drawn carriages in Central

Park. Yeah, you know, I'm not a, you know, I've not clocked hardly any time in New York, so I don't have a strong opinion on that. It does remind me, though, my takeaway from that is I need to find that online copy of It Came Upon a Midnight Clear to get ready for Christmas this year. This was a made-for-TV movie that I watched once as a kid, and it really stuck in my craw with Mickey Rooney. Exactly and then I found a streaming version Of it last Christmas and watched it And just you know just really eased into my Midlife crisis and I'm gonna write a show for us and put it on right here at Seaport And so I need to find that again I hope it didn't disappear from The internet in the in the past 12 Months because I need to watch that again

This holiday season my dad can bit torrent it for you

I was actually just about to see it I was like there's No way I can bit torrent that I mean it was just It was a made for TV Christmas Movie and remember did it have Swoozie Kurtz No, who was the – oh, it doesn't matter. I want to get this in before I forget.

Let me just do a little hugging and kissing. Good, clean fun.

The TikTok account that created that song at the beginning goes by not the main characters, all one word, not the main characters, NTMC on TikTok.

And as I was explaining to you before the show, that is its own – that song, which is that person presumably wrote about Noodle and about No Bones Day. Do you want to hear it again? It's kind of a meta joke on Twitter because there's another song that's to the same tune that says Mama Says That It Was Okay, and people will use that sort of to justify things. Like they'll talk about, you know, who said that you can, you know, I don't know, dress in all leather, and then the song Mama Says It Was Okay was playing, and it'll cut to like Madonna dressed in all leather or something. Like some famous person sort of giving them tacit permission to do whatever they're doing. So this song, this No Bone song, is a parody of that song.

If it's a no-bones day, I just stay in bed Noodle said it's fine if I don't get dressed His legs are made of Jell-O Sorry you didn't get the memo Cause Noodle said that it was okay Noodle said that it was quite alright If I don't leave my house all night It's a no-bones day

I had a dream I think Madonna was in one of my dreams last night

I feel like Madonna is kind of losing it I think, and that's my second spicy take for the day I'm going to try to out-spice Theo today if I can Yeah, please, cover it up Obviously, like, actually when we were having a dinner last night They had it on, the music in this bar was on some kind of 80s thing And I was loving it And they were playing a combination of Tina Turner songs and Madonna songs And I was into it So let me just be on the record as saying I really enjoy the music of Madonna But I do think that she has sort of painted herself into a corner By being outrageous because it's harder and harder. It's hard to be outrageous when you're 70, you know? And so, like, when I see Madge, you know, dressed up like a dominatrix or on, you know, the MTV whatever awards being kind of edgy, it doesn't feel as, or even her videos that she puts out, it's just kind of like, that's a tough position to, if your brand is blowing people's minds with your edginess, it's really hard to keep that up over a lifetime.

You know, I haven't been following her. I'm just now remembering that it was at the beginning of the COVID lockdown. She did some outrageous stuff in a bathtub or something. Yeah. That's the last I've heard.

Yeah, I think she was trying to sort of identify with people about getting through the pandemic. But it was like her version of getting through the pandemic was not super relatable to the rest of us. I think she was in a bathtub filled with like roses or something. Something that didn't feel like we're all in this together. Yeah.

Was she singing or lip syncing something? And we saw that she had, like, it was a multi-camera setup, though. Yeah.

Right. That was the thing that was wild was that it wasn't like she just, like.

me doing the hey dummies video this week she just like grabbed a cell phone camera and started filming herself it was like there was lights i think we saw light in the mirror right yeah so they had brought something in and lighted it which was like wow this was very intentional for how not

great it ended up yeah it was just supposed to be like kind of a hey you know like just a virally

kind of tiktoky kind of thing any whoozle uh i saw this um actually becca hipped me to this article um in the new york times which really which which actually um sort of refers back to a buzzfeed piece about why bj novak from the office and other things why he has faces on hundreds of random products in parts of the world uh there is a uh rainbow face paint from uruguay that says rainbow art and on the package got a picture of bj novak with like face paint on like they've clearly photoshopped the face paint on what i find amazing is that under where it says rainbow art The packaging says To be highly praised and appreciated By consuming public That's the sales pitch For both this face paint and TBTL To be highly praised and appreciated By consuming public Anyway it turns out And people have pieces together From BJ Novak's own social media profile Instagram I think Where he's been posting this stuff Somebody like accidentally uploaded A picture of him To a sort of public domain website and so his there's a version of his face it's just this one photo that's out there and it's on like Swedish cologne it's on um like hair clippers that's the only one I saw I um somebody

just posted to their social media I didn't know that this was a whole thing I thought they just came across one instance of BJ Novak's face on a pair of hair trimmers and they thought it was funny so they posted it i didn't realize this is a whole thing it's a whole thing it's like on

hundreds of products this was alissa look pat writing in the new york times for the last few years any swedes who purchased a bottle of calvin klein's encounter cologne were probably greeted by the piercing gaze of an american actor same for anyone who purchased certain brands of face paint in uruguay electric razors in china or knee length ponchos in europe um somebody again accidentally or mistakenly uploaded a photo of pj novak to some website that's like i guess just photos you can use without paying any fees and now all of these places are using his face what's kind of funny to me is that he's not even going after them he said he's having too much fun no that's good i get too busy being delighted by it to like lawyer up and go try to sue a face paint

company from uruguay oh you love that i don't know much about him but i've always gotten just general good vibes and i think have i heard that he's just kind of like a good guy people generally just kind of like him i mean that's that's what you like to hear from somebody in his position who's just saying whatever it's funny like that that's good do you know my bj novak story by the way no this is a true story i don't know i'm up for any bj story that you want to tell but it's a um but it's a true story i used to work at kcrw you can fact check that

Okay.

That's true. And, of course, this is an L.A. radio station.

Giving you two Pinocchios for that.

Oh, no. I used to work there. And, of course, a lot of famous people would kind of pass through. There was a very popular morning radio show, like a music show. So a lot of bands would pass through.

Morning becomes eclectic.

Exactly. And then also actors and people would come through for various interviews on the various shows because it was Los Angeles. and also I had a colleague who looked remarkably like BJ Novak I'm blanking on his name right now I think I still follow him on Instagram good looking guy obviously not a guy I worked with closely though he worked in kind of this other room I worked in the newsroom he worked in this other room I would see him pass by every now and then I think I knew him well enough to say a quick hello but I would always think boy he looks like BJ Novak then one day I was sitting at my desk And my colleague walked by And then after he left the room Everybody was really buzzing about him being in the room And I realized, oh, that was BJ Novak I thought it was just my colleague who looked like BJ Novak But then one day BJ Novak actually walked across the room And I didn't really notice Because I just thought he was my colleague

And also you've said this And I actually find this to be tremendously comforting You've said that you don't really look at people's faces

Yeah, I'm not good at that I think I have eye contact issues

I find it comforting because I'm not stressed that like oh if I have A pimple or something you're gonna Be noting it like if I come over to your house Like I feel like it's a safe space for me Like you're not remembering What I used to weigh or Notice I just I like that I think that's actually kind of like I said it's comforting To me that you're not really paying attention to what

I look like but even and I listen I mean You and I are both in our Own heads about all kinds of things so I'm not

You

trying to lecture you or tell you how you should think or whatever all of our brains are bad it's

no brains day but i should be but like i should be more concerned about what i look like yeah i

was gonna say well i thought you were what was with you the other day pizza face no um but given our specific relationship even if i was somebody who noticed things that were right in front of my face i just don't think that you should ever care how you present to me of all people i should be i know like almost as anybody in your life with maybe the possible exception of your family members like i just you couldn't you know i just couldn't i just couldn't care less and then you know our relationship is completely based on friendship and work and it doesn't matter

what you look like in any way and a certain amount of sexual tension well that is well That is true.

That is the steam power that sort of keeps us pushing forward.

That's the secret sauce of this show. And if I let myself go, Andrew, that's going to evaporate and we're going to lose the magic that we've got here on TBTL. I know that intellectually, right? Like I know – and frankly, no one cares what I look like. Like nobody is judging me nearly as closely as I'm judging myself. But it's like sort of like you and your ordering food thing. It's like our insecurities are not – they do not conform to the laws of rational thinking. Yeah, no, of course. They just are what they are. Hey, there's a school in New York that is telling its students not to dress as characters from Squid Game. I have only gotten through one episode of it, but my sense is it gets hyper-violent. And so they just don't want kids, which is kind of interesting because, I mean, And I guess superheroes are on the side of good, as it were. But, I mean, I feel like if you start to really think about what's behind a lot of costumes, it could be, you know. I mean, vampires aren't exactly, you know, pacifists, you know. Like, a lot of costumes, if we think about them, are based in some amount of violence. But they've decided Squid Games is too hyper-violent and they don't want kids dressing up for Squid Games. What this brings to mind is a picture my sister Sarah sent around Hawk Squad yesterday. my nephew little luke loves spider-man and he dressed up like spider-man for his school's halloween thing and there are no less than one two three four five six seven seven kids dressed up as well six kids dressed up as spider-man and then one dressed up as spider gwen oh nice and are they all pointing at each other like the meme um like the cartoon yeah no they're just sitting there but it would appear that 80 percent of the students in little luke's class dressed up as somebody for some version of spider-man or spider-gwen i like it for for halloween like that is clearly a very popular i wonder why spider-man because i remember being obsessed with spider-man too i think it has to do with the webs and this kind of sense of like oh if you could shoot a web from your hand and then like fly around these buildings there's just something like they're not all dressed as superman right they're not all dressed like they're dressed as spider-man or spider-gwen there's something about spider-man that i think intrigues the brain of a certain

age of child because it certainly did for me I remember being confused and maybe I'm still confused although I guess I know the origin story now I was always confused about where the web was coming from was it coming from his body or was he wearing a device and I think we now know like he got bit by a spider which means yes it gave him spider skills that go beyond just leaping and balance and all of those but like he's actually shooting those out of his wrist or is he wearing a device. I keep talking myself out of it. I was going to say it came from his body.

I think he should. I mean, God, this is a follow-up to the Patsy Cline conversation yesterday in terms of just angering the listeners. But I don't think it's a device. I think he's sort of part spider. Right?

So if I got a close-up shot of his wrist, what would it look like? While he's not shooting it out, does he have holes there? How does Spider-Man

shoot webs? When Spider-Man fires His web shooter ejects a highly combustive chemical solvent from the ports that will burst into flames upon contact with the intended target. What? Hold on. Let's see. Does Spider-Man shoot webs from his body or gadgets? Okay. Now we're getting down to it. Let's see here. In the traditional version of the story, Peter Parker created a web fluid that could be contained in cartridges, which when placed in the shooters allowed him to fire out a compound that emulates a spider's webbing. Because the webbing was made scientifically, Spidey could adjust the formula or combine it with different chemicals. So it is a fluid. It's not – I mean that's – let's be honest. That's less gross.

Yeah, that makes a lot more sense because –

Because it's spurting out of his body.

And the spider bite still gave him all kinds of abilities to leap and fly around. I have somebody who's knocking at my door insistently. I think I've got to go check this out. Can we do a technical problem?

of music and i'll come back later all right are we still doing the show what's going on

we're just having a little um little pleasant hold music what happened um it was just a delivery

but apparently it was something that he couldn't leave. Usually they'll just leave deliveries there, but it's also work-related. It's regarding a sponsor that's coming up pretty soon, so it's probably pretty good that I grabbed this.

Oh, nice. Well, I'm excited to hear about that during the commercials of this show weeks from now.

Yes, next week or two weeks from now, I would say. Another problem here, though, is now that I have gotten up and kind of, I don't know, I've just woken the whole house now. Old farty Theo is now awake, so now that's going to lead to screaming, probably. That'll Michael pick up. Sorry about this. Everything's going to seed.

The important thing, though, is we learned that Spider-Man shoots webs from a compound that he makes. It's not coming out of his body.

That makes sense, because I always wondered, like, what is the... Why am I even saying this? Never mind. I'm not going to finish that thought. But, yeah, what does he have? Some sort of, like, weird, gross hole in his hand, like, all the time when he's not shooting webs? A stigmata. Yeah, that's not the word I was looking for. I was actually trying to think. There's a word for like, this is so dark, Walsh. Jeez, Louise. What is the hole that sometimes has to be built in somebody's throat?

Well, that would be a, I think the term for that kind of hole is called a stoma.

Stoma is exactly the word I was looking for.

He does not have a wrist stoma. Okay, good. I'm happy to report.

There's a right way to rock and a wrong way to roll. You can't just listen to your soul Just remember that life is number one You can't be having so much fun

I'm going to do something really stupid here because there is another thing I wanted to ask you regarding Squid Game. And so we are in the Blur's Day segment, but I'm going to kill the Blur's Day music for a second. So I still have not seen Squid Game. I'm sorry, I'm destroying the show, Luke, earnestly um but i still have not seen squid game but i feel like i've seen it now because genevieve showed me a parody video that uh aired on saturday night live recently of um it's like a rap it's like one of those country rap songs all about squid game and the guest was uh rami malik and i know pete davidson is in here i don't remember who else is in here um and i'm gonna play it for you because i it was funny that genevieve was playing this for me and laughing and i i mean i got it you can get the jokes from context but i also thought it was funny like neither one of us has seen the source material and then i started in because it's a song parody i was wondering if this is just a song style parody again it's that kind of new country sound or is this an actual parody of a real song that's out there so is it like two jokes that i'm missing it's like it's a joke about remaking the song about squid game take a listen to this and tell me if you have

any insight yeah that's just applause that's the audience don't got a lot of money drive a rusted out chevy i just got laid off bar tab ain't paid off my ex-wife hates me i even had to sell my puppy yes i'm broken it's a damn shame Yes, I gotta play the squid game Yes, I gotta play the squid game My only option is the squid game Have a number, not a real name Cause I'm playing in the squid game Weird guards, pink guards Locked us in a big room They got symbols on their faces Like the ones on Playstations And the main guy looks like Dr. Doom

That is true I don't know if we have to play the whole thing. It is very catchy, though. After I heard this the first time the other night, I was singing it all night. And that's when I started thinking, hey, am I just singing a parody version of a real song or is this, you know, a new tune?

If this is, I think this is just in a style. Yeah. I'm not familiar with, if this is a parody of an existing song, I'm not familiar with that song. But it just is a kind of a style of music that, like you said, is kind of it's sort of they sometimes call it hiccup.

Yeah.

Like it's sort of like country rapping. You know, the song that I have just infecting my brain is that stupid. Yeah, we fancy like Applebee's on a date night. I don't know it. Well, they play it incessantly now. applebee's commercials during football games i'm actually quite shocked you haven't it hasn't um hasn't made its way into your brain it was a i mean it was a legit country song that then got really big on tiktok people started using it and then applebee's found out about it and now is using it in its ads and it's just a a real turd a real turd burger of a song but it's stuck in my head yeah let's listen let's let's put our evil inside the listeners sorry my girl is banging

Patsy Cline is rolling in her grave.

This is what country music is now.

Shit, that sounds good, though.

Like, not the music. But I would like right now steak with you.

You had a steak at Applebee's in Eureka. You said it wasn't bad.

Yes, it was surprisingly good. So, yeah, boy, that actually is working. I'll bet you now that I know the origin of that song and I have some context, I will probably notice that in the Applebee's commercials. But Applebee's commercials tend to just kind of whiz by me, just whiff right out the window.

Well, during your active television viewing. Exactly. Especially during a commercial. You're probably up and around and puttering and stressing about the Browns. So you're not really noticing that.

Yeah, even though I love commercials and I talk about commercials a lot, I also, like during football games often, that's definitely like, well, I've got to get a beer or get rid of a beer out of my system or whatever. Hey, don't we do blurs?

Tell you what, Andrew, you don't buy the beer. You just rent it.

Where do you come up with this stuff?

To your soul Just remember that life Is number one You can be having So much fun Just remember that life Life is much fun You can be Number one

Wait for a little hoagie

Alright, who wants to do some Blur's Days? Hey, I do I do have my spooky sound machine here I'm not as good at this as you are, though, but I'll try to punctuate with some spooky sounds here and there. Let's start with Jennifer, who says, Happy 13th Blur's Day to my nibbling Haven on Halloween. Haven is a good Halloween name. That's a good matching of a name and a birthday. While we sadly do not see each other too often with me in Seattle and you in Minnesota, the land of 100 lakes, I hope you have a fabulous day. I love you and hope to see you soon. Love, Auntie Monkey. Cute. I added the thing about the lakes. Don't anybody get mad at Jennifer.

Nate says, happy early birthday to Kate in Seattle. The best of the TBTL Kates. And my favorite person.

And when he said that, that shocked me.

Love, Nate.

Wow. I mean, has anybody thrown down a gauntlet in a Blur's Day before?

Squid games amongst the Kate listeners of the show.

He's going to play me a squid game It's in there, man It's going to be in there all day Eric, quote-unquote The sweetest ten of the sweet tens

Oh, right Hey-do It's probably buying a razor with BJ Novak's face on it

As we speak I was time banditing Machete cut style That means going back and forth And listening in no comprehensible order Oh, that was aggressive. And I stumbled on the show you guys did on my 46th birthday, October 6th. I was delighted to hear you talking about turning 45 and how old it made you feel. It felt almost like a Blur's Day message long hidden that suddenly surfaced. So thank you for all of that.

You are welcome, Eric. I really wish I would have paid more attention in Swedish class. That's all you got. Got nothing. I got K-Do. So I've got Jag Talar Engelska och Lite Svenska.

You know how you say Blur's Day in Swedish?

Wait, does Jag Talar mean my name is Luke, or does that mean I speak some Luke? Eric, get at me. Rachel in Denver says, Happy birthday to my sweetest husband, Matt. He gave me the best Blur's Day in August, and I can't hope to compete with it. But let's just say that I am the luckiest person on the planet. I don't know what karmic currency I've gathered in past lives to deserve you, but I am very grateful for it. I love you more than life, and have a wonderful birthday, sweetie. Let me just say again, ah, that's so cute. She's also sort of slightly quoting a song from The Sound of Music.

what part well where they're singing about somewhere in my wicked childhood I must have done something good because here you are standing there loving me whether or not you should or whatever so they're basically Georg and Julie Andrews' character are professing their love to each other and they're saying basically like I did something Somehow karma is helping me out with this.

Well, I'm about to do something karmically bad here because Rachel's been a long-time listener of the show. I believe she made the Denver dossier. I am petrified. Petrified with this story. What are you going to do? This is a very, very romantic message, and I don't want to ruin that. So why am I going to? Because here's my problem.

You don't have to ruin it. You are in control of what you say and don't say.

It has to be said, if Matt looks at this message very closely, he will realize that Rachel probably has other husbands.

Yeah, there is that. My sweetest husband.

My sweetest husband. So she has multiple husbands, and he's the sweetest one, which is good. That's a good thing. That's very romantic. But I just don't know if this is how Matt is finding out. It's just something to think about.

What are the bigamy laws in Colorado, I think, is what we kind of need to figure out before we move on with these messages.

Right to the legal aspect. Danny?

Get one of our Dannys on it, please.

Holly says, happy Blursey to the only 10 I know in real life, Jill, a.k.a. IntelliJill. No, IntiJill. Hope it was great. This is from Holly in Lakewood, Ohio, but Jill knows me as Ginger. I think we're talking roller derby here, Luke. I think that's why there are some A.K.A.'s going on here. Got it, okay. Also, shout out to Lakewood, Ohio.

and ginger. Integel and ginger kicking it. Got that. Okay, Rebecca in Philly says, I'd like to send a very happy blurs to my West Coast dream girl Amy, a.k.a. Amelia in Bellingham, the Bay City. She and I have been IRL pals for 15 plus years and found out we were both tens many years ago. She really is everything I want to be. So happy she is on this planet. I can attest to that, Rebecca. I know Amelia and her husband and their awesome kids and she's awesome. Also, Amelia, I mentioned this a couple times, but Amelia is the reason that I was able to go to that backyard show with Doug Marsh from The Spill because she saw something on Facebook and said, hey, you might want to go to this. And I did and it was wonderful. So happy Blur's Day, Amelia.

Happy Blur's Day. Oh no, this next Blur's Day looks like it's trapped in this coffin.

Was David reading it?

All right, got it open. Sally says happiest is acting, Luke. It's acting. Sally says happiest 17th.

Finding truth in imaginary circumstances.

Happiest 17th Blurs Day to my youngest five, Grace. She is smart and talented. She plays five different instruments, is a drama and band geek, and loves to read. She's becoming fluent in ASL and wants to be a history teacher for the hearing impaired. I'm so proud of everything she is doing. And for that, she will be getting that nose piercing that she's been asking for. I wonder if this is how Grace is finding this out. I love this. I think another gift was announced during the Blurs days last week. I love this development. And also, get that nose ring. It's a Bones Day. That's right.

Julie, right here in Portland, Oregon Says, I want to wish a happy 29th Golden Blur's Day to my wonderful husband, Dylan We could talk or not talk forever And still find things to not talk about I used to be as 11 But it didn't take long for me to become a well-rounded 10 And I'm not going to say what that makes him To me, that's too fresh And, ooh, explicit Any advice for Dylan going into his 29th year? Ooh, that really turns it around on us a bit, doesn't it? Sure does. I would say enjoy it. This sounds like the biggest old man thing to say, but I don't think I spent enough time enjoying my 20th. I mean, I enjoyed myself, don't get me wrong, but when you get to be the ripe old age of 45, like I am, I just remember being 29 very fondly. So, Dylan, I would just say enjoy it and enjoy your youth. You probably feel old at 29, but you are very young still, and you have so much fun ahead of you. So I guess I would just say enjoy it.

And go big into Dogecoin.

Yes! I saw something crazy. It had to be a misprint. Maybe they meant it.

Kind of sort of jokingly Somebody wrote like If they would have put $10,000 Into Shiba coin It would be worth $5 million now Like if you put $10,000 into Shiba like this year There's no way it's gone up that much But also

Not a lot of people just have $10,000 That they can take a flyer Well that's true

I mean a $10,000 is not nothing But I was just like the math That had to be I'm sure the person was just sort of joking because it was like them staring into the middle distance and then there was music playing. What they wrote on the screen of TikTok was me thinking about how if I would have invested $10,000 in Shiba coin, it would be worth $5 million now. But they were saying within the year 2021, I was like, there's no way that math works out. Yeah. Anyway. So that's my advice, Dylan. Get a time machine and go buy crypto.

Yeah. Riley says, happy birthday to Minnie. I'm super excited that you got to spend your birthday traveling somewhere beautiful and that I get to be there for it. Here's to another year of adventures, taking care of our cat, working on our new house, and going on safe trips together. Mr. Bean and I, that's their cat, Luke. Mr. Bean and I are super lucky to have you, and I hope your birthday is a great one. Happy Blurs Day, Vinny, from Riley and us. I have a cat on my lap right now. I had to pick him up. You could probably hear him. I was trying to drown you out in music, Luke. Not you, but I was trying to keep that music hot so you couldn't hear Theo. He really wants his lunch now.

Well, that's perfect timing Because we're here at the end of the show I had an idea for a song

Good, I was hoping you did

Because we were talking about Spider-Man What about the Spider-Bite song By the Flaming Lips

Okay, I don't know it But I'll get there Spider-Bite

It's off of The Soft Bulletin Which I think is one of the top Maybe 20 albums Maybe top 30 albums of all time Big fan So we can go out with this A little flaming lips for you On a Thursday God I cannot believe Tomorrow is Friday I know this week This week has really Raced by

I'm trying to figure out If I still have enough You know If I've kept my powder Dry enough On the whole car part Situation To roll that In the newsletter This afternoon

This is my last Tomorrow will be my last day I think doing the show From here Oh yeah You're moving Although who knows If they don't migrate My internet I may be back here In an empty apartment On Monday Just with this microphone That sounds sad We'll see Anyway Alright thanks for listening everybody we will be back here tomorrow with another one of these here tbtl episodes for you so please do join us for that till then have a great thursday stay dry take care of yourselves and each other and please remember no mountain too tall and good luck to all

To lose your arm would surely upset your brain The poison then could reach your heart from a vein I was glad that it didn't destroy you How sad that would be Cause if it destroyed you It would destroy me When you had that accident in your car That whole thing just really seemed to bizarre

Earlier today, tragedy striking the new musical Spider-Man 2, Too Many Spider-Men The show billed as the most flying Spider-Man Ever assembled on one stage Power out