Muse

Tim Cramlin, Cramlin Advertising. Cramlin Advertising? Are you Hank Cramlin's son? That I am, yeah. Hank Cramlin, what a legend. How is your father? He went insane. He lives in a nuthouse now. Oh. Well, the next time you see him, you tell him Sally Pomerantz from Chicago said hello. He won't understand that. Talking to him is like talking to Bugs Bunny. Well, then you tell him what's up, Doc. Thank you. That'll mean a lot to him.

TBTL! Is that a first-time slammer? Slammer what? In the ring. How do you slam? Hey, underneath you tell me. Are you all right? No. No, I'm confused. Nothing makes sense to me anymore. This face is not my face.

www.this and www.that. Let's www.explain it.

Sounds like you're really going through some tough stuff right now. It's too bad there's not doctors for your mind.

And I also think it wouldn't hurt you to talk to a therapist about your bathroom issues, because there's clearly something going on there.

My God, man! How much more can we take? I can only imagine what the audience is thinking!

All right, hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Tuesday edition of TBTL, a show that just might be too beautiful to live. Huggy? Hugga? Huggy. Huggy. Huggy. Huggy. Huggy. Huggy. Huggy. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host. Podcast is usually how people with no hope and no future begin when they run out of other options. Coming to you from the Hollywood Broadcast Center right here in Portland, Oregon, where I spent really longer than I should have this morning, seriously contemplating if I should try to find a cheap airplane ticket to go to England.

It's time for Operation Crazy Plan.

Because of something that I have become quite obsessed by over the course of the last 12 hours. We'll probably end up getting into that because, of course, I can't keep anything inside. Let's see. What else are we going to talk about here on episode 3620 in a collector's series? Let the fun begin. Oh, I know. that Nicole Kidman AMC movie advertisement that is sort of an advertisement for coming back to the movies but the main place they now play it is at AMC when you're about to see a movie which is interesting marketing you're already there so like you're kind of at that point in the bag for the idea of visiting a film in real life But that has developed a cult fan base for reasons that we will get into coming up. Speaking of things with cult fan bases, Futurama is being rebooted by Hulu. Just one problem. So you got my money? the voice of bender the robot the alcohol swilling robot uh is holding out his name is john dimaggio he wants more pay and it's turned into quite the kerfuffle on the internet and it's sparking a conversation about how much we pay and also how much we maybe undervalue voiceover actors of some of our favorite animated shows so we'll talk about that as well we'll do all that with the of this guy, the longest-running co-bro of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. I personally find him hilarious, dog. I think this guy's sense of humor never developed past junior high school. We're not going to let that stop us today, though. He is Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. Good morning, my friend.

Good morning, Luke. I think you're right. I think my sense of humor has not developed much.

But that's the kind of humor I like. Yeah. So that's why it works. That's why this relationship works.

And it was one of those things where it's like, you know how they say the best way to look young when you're old is to look old when you're young? I don't know if they say it exactly like that, but you know what I'm talking about. Larry David looked old when he was 12 years old. Now it looks like he hasn't aged in 50 years because he's always looked like that. Precisely. So I was like that with my humor. Like my humor was so advanced when I was even in grade school. When you were like one. Yeah, exactly. which is why I got punched in the face a lot in grade school. My humor was just so advanced. And then I didn't get punched in the face a lot, by the way. That was a joke. But now I've just kind of grown into it. And you sort of are thinking like, oh, Andrew hasn't grown much. But no, I was just there before everybody else. Yeah.

You know where I'm about to be? Yeah, in England, apparently? Maybe. Maybe. I may be flying. I haven't totally made up my mind, but I'm going to try to find the exact city that I have to fly to, Andrew. Just maybe you can.

help me with directions or getting on Expedia or something. I am considering flying to England to try to rescue a dog named Luke that is at an animal shelter in England. And they threw a Valentine's Day party, adoption party for this dog, Luke, and nobody came to adopt this dog. and I tweeted about it last night, and I wished the dog Luke a happy Valentine's Day. It's just a coincidence we have the same name. But I tweeted the dog Luke a happy Valentine's Day message, and a lot of people interacted with that. A lot of people had the same reaction I did. And to be totally honest, I just expected to wake up this morning and see that the Internet had done its thing.

Of course.

And that Luke the dog would be... The place is called Battersea, by the way. I think that might be the name of a location. It's also the name of this particular kind of like animal shelter. Luke has been there for like over 200 days. He is described as a mongrel. That feels very British to me. I don't think we call them mongrels over here. That feels very Rudyard Kipling. There was a mongrel in the entryway of the home.

Now, a mongrel is not the same as a mutt. Does a mongrel mean that it was like kind of... I always think of a mongrel as something that's like kind of living on the streets and just surviving and scrappy and dirty.

That's what I think of as well. I guess you're right. Maybe mongrel. I mean, breed, they list as mongrel.

No, I'm wrong. It's just mutt. Mongrel is a dog of no definable type or breed. Love it. I'm a mongrel guy myself.

This dog, Luke, is so cute. I mean, it doesn't hurt that they had it wearing a bandana that said free kisses and it had a party hat on and it just had the most expectant look on its face. So this dog, Luke, was a stray. It was just living on the streets of England. Somebody got it to this shelter. He's described as being very shy, but a sweetheart. Everybody at the shelter really loves him. And like I said, I was expecting to wake up this morning and just see that this dog has been adopted because he's got an Internet famous. And he is not adopted. I'm on their website. I'm going through, it's like Redfin of animals I'm looking, half the stuff is pending The seller has accepted An offer on some of these Rescues, Andrew, but there is Luke is, as of this recording On Tuesday, February the 15th Luke is very much still available At this At this rescue Place, and I'm not even kidding I had the thought, would it be an interesting adventure for TBTL if I flew to England and adopted This dog and brought the dog back to the US And we lived happily ever after

Well I hate to be a bummer I just find it incredibly difficult to believe That by the end of today That this dog won't be adopted I'm with you that I'm shocked that the dog Was not adopted overnight But we're at the beginning of this I just feel like you know Maybe our listener Paul Is already filling out the paperwork right there Maybe he made the trip from London I'm not sure exactly What is this city? I don't know if you still have it in front of you Battersea Battersea I don't know what that You know it's a small country I mean, I'm sure it's not that far away. Oh, you know what? I think that this might be a neighborhood in London. Oh, there you go. See? When I'm right, I'm right.

You can't afford not to, Paul.

You can't afford not to.

But the thing is, I feel like I have a real connection with this dog now because we're both named Luke. Also, they're saying that Luke would do best if he was the only pet. I don't have any pets anymore. I guess I have visitation with Rudy and Olive. But like living here in Portland with me, I don't have any pets.

And also, I mean, you're going to have to get rid of Randy, I guess.

Well, you know what? Randy's dustbin has been full for the last week. And honestly, I don't think it's I'm going to have to rehome Randy.

Well, see, that makes me think you're not ready for Luke, though, then.

Well, don't tell the pet shelter that I just rehomed a Roomba, OK? Do not mess this up for me, Andrew. I swear to God. but i also um they were saying that this the luke the dog would would do best in a home where there weren't any cats i don't have any cats here so like it could be me and luke it could be two luke's luking it up it'd be a an interesting story it probably even gets some maybe some earned media for tbtl podcast host flies to england to adopt lovable dog that he shares a name with i mean

i feel like that could be a thing i mean don't let me stop you um you know and if nothing else you get there and if Luke's no longer I mean you can make some phone calls well I would definitely I do a little advance I mean I would have to lock it down this is a very very cute dog I'm on this page as well one thing I like about I don't spend a lot of time on animal adoption pages but what I like is there is a kind of a very simple fact

sheet about this dog right like age breed sex but then there are some questions about the dog and then they answer those in first person on behalf of the dog or maybe Luke filled this out himself but it says he's a very intelligent dog living with children I can live with teenagers living with dogs that makes one of us I prefer to live alone living with cats I can't live with cats see I can live with teenagers I prefer to live alone I can't live with cats and that's classic dog behavior right there So I like that hard nose. It's a hard no. Exactly. Ideal home location. I prefer to live away from the inner city. So I don't know if that's going to be a problem for you, Luke. I mean, you can probably fudge some paperwork on that. But anyway, yeah, so I do. I do like that. I understand. I understand the appeal. This is a very, very cute dog. What is the age here? The age is five years.

Five, but they don't know because he's a mongrel. Yeah. So they're guessing because he was just living out there on the streets Or in the woods or something I feel like if he is not adopted Today is Tuesday If he's not adopted by the end of the week I'm going to seriously consider Getting in touch with them and seeing I mean it would be a hell of a story That's the thing Like hey where did you get your dog from Well interestingly enough I flew to England And got him And I just think that would be kind of a fun story Again we by coincidence have the same name

It would be funny if you told people, I like to think I rescued him. Yeah, you did. He's a rescue dog. I'm sorry. I always do this. Is there any phrase that makes you cringe any more than I like to think he rescued me? Yes.

It's called, I just watched Super Bowl for the commercials. I was trying desperately on Sunday to compose a tweet that was somehow related to that phenomenon. and just how, you know, that's a joke that leaves me fairly cold at this point. Sure. I just watched the Super Bowl for the commercials, but I couldn't come up with anything that was going to in any way benefit the wider world, although, you know, few of my tweets do, so I don't know why that stopped me in this particular case.

I just watched the Super Bowl for the articles. That's pretty good. That's all right. I'm on the fly. I'm just workshopping things here. I have some tape I might play for you later on in the show of we have a couple of kids calling in who literally are workshopping a joke. They use that phrase. Sorry, we've workshopped this joke and they love leaving jokes on our voicemail line. Yeah, I love it. Isn't there also some kind of mystery that? Oh, yeah. Do we have we're working on? Give me five minutes on a little audio journey I took today that starts with this voicemail that we got from listener Lou. Now, Lou is referring to a drop that we momentarily misplaced, but we have it again. Shame. It's the shame drop, the mortal. I have so much trouble saying that. I have a real problem saying mortal because when I say it, I think I'm supposed to say mortar, like mortar and pestle. There's something in that that it's very difficult to say. Anyway, here's the drop that we momentarily misplaced the other day.

For one thing, I have no shame before another mortal.

You and I had that labeled kind of incorrectly in both of our libraries, and we couldn't call it up. And then listener Ben gave us a hint. He said, look for shame-related drops, and we found it. So that felt great. That was a victory right there. But then, of course, not being able to leave well enough alone, you and I start talking about, yeah, but what is that from? Like that was from a piece of news tape I think that you and I grabbed Probably when we were working together At the commercial radio station Not doing TBTL but doing the Ross and Burbank show It just feels like it was from that era Would you agree with that Luke?

My knee jerk is that My first thought is It was a little bit more recent than that But I'm terrible with this kind of stuff I don't have any firm reason to believe that

Okay for me it seemed to be the type of thing And this would happen every so often And there would be a story with like, you know, some sort of either a viral story or a local story that had such good tape in it that it would then it would make it would breach that gap between our actual more earnest radio show to the TBTL verse. I sort of felt like that was it. I would believe that to be the case with this. I'm also not great with this stuff either, but I had a vibe of like 2012, 2014 or something. And then we got this voicemail from Lou.

Hey, dummies. This is Lou from Charlottesville, Virginia. I think I know who that shame drop is about. I think it was from an obscure candidate from the Tennessee governor's race. And we would have to look back at maybe like 2010, 2012.

That is my memory, because I think I remember it was like an early televised debate that Luke was mildly obsessed with. So I hope you're having a good evening. Ahoy, ahoy. First of all.

Power out. Bye. I like that ending. First of all, your memory is really good on Mark Coonrippi, because that is where eventually some of my Googling led me today. Here's what I did. Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to steal. No, no, no, no. I didn't mean to fast forward in the journey, but that name stuck in my head because it's such a unique name.

Yes. So here's the deal. I thought that Lou was on to something. So I looked up gubernatorial terms in Tennessee this morning, and they are on four-year terms. So this would have either been 2010, 2014, 2018, or 2022. Obviously, it wasn't 2022. I don't think it was 2010 because I wasn't working on the show then. So that makes it 2014 or 2018. my gut says this is from 2014 if any of this if lou is right about any of this so then i look up the 2014 gubernatorial candidates list and you have uh bill haslam he was the incumbent governor

i mean i think we can all agree that this is not him our american spirit is being tested

but in tennessee we're proof okay i mean do we need to compare that is that's the one thing i I think we know that that is not the same guy, right? Okay, so then you're right. I did end up on Coon Rippey. I was like, oh, that name rings a bell. Was it that Mark Coon Rippey Brown guy? And, of course, he went viral for kind of a different reason. He did run for –

Did he have a raccoon?

Yes, exactly. Climbing on him? He was a guy who first went viral, not as a candidate at all, but just as a guy who had a pet raccoon. And did he live in a holler? I think he lived in a holler

And he was talking about an apple That was his big thing

Later on he did First he's just viral, he has this raccoon And he loves it and he showers with it Then the authorities try to seize Or do seize his raccoon Because you can't have wild animals like that So then that becomes kind of a cause celeb And that leads him to run For governor in 2014 And then he released this which is his campaign announcement.

January 3rd, 2014, year of our Lord, I've officially tossed my hat into the ring to run for governor of the great state of Tennessee. I appreciate your vote this year in August.

He's got a bowl of fruit in front of him.

We bring the United States back to where it's supposed to be, one state at a time, starting with Tennessee. We are one nation under God. not above god and just like the purity of this apple well i don't know what i was well i don't know where i was going with that but i guarantee you there'll be changes made changes you'll like

now that that led to a big argument between you me and jen about whether or not he knew he was going to be doing that spoof i very much still believe that he knew he was going to do that spoof or something like it um i think you're on the other side of that we don't have to relitigate that we've argued about that since 2014 um but i don't think that's him i think and i'm wondering now if lou is kind of confusing or conflating these two stories i did find basil marceau was also somebody running and this is interesting tape here i do not think it's him

but i think it's worth a listen all right well all this week channel four is working for you to help you make a choice in the governor's primary race as part of that commitment we have given all five

candidates from the two major parties time during our news to let you know where they stand in their own words about the topics of their choosing. That's right. And the order was chosen by random

drawing tonight. We hear from Basil Marceau. I'm basilmarceau.com, the Republican candidate for governor. I like to recall all permits and registration for guns. Everyone can carry guns. If you kill someone, no, you get murdered. You go to jail. And I like to put plant grass or vegetation across from the state where I need a vacant lot and sell it for gas so we can use it for our expenses.

You'd be surprised to hear that he did not win the election. Wow. It was an interesting platform.

So his platform was zero gun regulation and just Western justice. If you shoot someone, you get shot. And also plant grass and sell the grass.

Yes. I mean, there's maybe 30 more seconds. This is about as far as I've gotten. Let's hear the rest.

I'm going to remove all goldfinch flags from the state and fly the real flag with three stripes. I also want to stop traffic.

Okay, he's going to remove all goldfinch flags from the state and fly the real flag with three stripes? Is that what we hear? That's what I think.

My guess is my guess.

is that you know the the state bird is a goldfinch and probably the tennessee state flag but i'm guessing three stripes is some confederate yes nightmare thing you know what i mean like probably

great it's probably inclusive that's my guess i'm gonna remove all goldfinch flags from the state and apply the real flag with three stripes i also want to stop traffic stops and set it up like the supreme court rule in the nose versus iowa you can't find an innocent car you can't look i want us all to vote for basil marcel i want to say the pledge leads us to a republic in the morning when you come out and we all pray to god and say amen and everyone have a nice day

and i see you all at the polls thank you have a nice day uh running on the um republican ticket

I love how disappointed that local TV news company was that Basil Marceau was of the like hundred people who had submitted the proper paperwork to, you know, get their airtime that they pulled Basil Marceau. But what they don't realize is that's such better television than any of like the legitimate candidates are just going to say that sort of normal campaign stuff. I, that was a big thing when, when I worked at KUOW many, many years ago, you know, there's all kinds of equal time stuff. And, you know, so when they would decide to have a debate between, you know, a couple of candidates for like a city council position, I think legally they had to also allow, maybe it was any of the other candidates who, who, who requested time. They had to give them time too And I remember having this guy I actually forget I want to say Richard Peterson But actually Richard Peterson is this different guy Maybe they were both named Richard Peterson There was a guy who had a public access TV show Called Kurt Cobain was murdered And his thing was He was convinced that Courtney Love Was involved in the death of Kurt Cobain And he had a whole public access show That was just him walking around With like a camera that he had somehow mounted to his body but it was looking up at just looking up his nostrils basically and he would just walk around places and try to like get onto courtney love's property or talk to random police and people and it was not a um super compelling argument and it was also not a great like a winning platform for city council but i remember them having to sit down and interview this guy because of the of the equal time rules and it just being like how do we just get through how do we get through this you know um as quickly but as legally as possible so that this guy doesn't

like turn around and sue us over something did it also have that that classic basil marceau breathing um i feel like a lot of times ironically it kind of did yeah this guy's public access show

really did because like i said he was sort of he was almost like one of the first like live streamers or something he was this is before we had cell phones that had cameras on them so he must have had a camcorder or something but he was always rolling and the show would just be like an hour of largely unedited unwatchable videotape that he would make like i said a lot of it was just filming right up his nose like that was the camera angle that's what made me wonder if

you're getting that that heavy breathing solid breathing i feel like i can picture the inside of this guy's nostril to this day how uh how do you feel if you end up going to england to meet luke you might want to vet ben for me we got a nine-month-old beagle here named ben now i know beagles can be loud i think beagle if it weren't for the noise thing a beagle might be like kind of the ideal dog for me you know kind of size wise like kind of a kind of a smallish dog but built like a medium-sized dog if that makes sense um you know kind of has that classic dog face that i like uh uh let's see your ben is nine months old i can live with teenagers i can live with other dogs i can't live with cats you know what that's going to be a non-starter for professor bananas i'm afraid so i guess i need to get andrew i have found kurt cobain was murdered

seattle public access television april 10th 1996 let's take can i play you a little bit of tape I mean, this thing is perfectly preserved. Here we go. He's at a cemetery. I don't know if it's maybe where Kurt Cobain is buried or... Let me skip ahead where he's talking a little bit here.

A nerve-wracking vice a man can pursue. It needs Kurt Cobain. The most persistent inquiry that we expect to be asked by those with a limited grasp of the situation is, why, why, why do we persist thusly? By the way, the guy's name is Richard Lee.

not Richard Peterson. Those of you who have

been with this adventure for any length of time and who can also appreciate the breadth of the implications of the case at hand, we'll have

little need to ask such a question without seeming to gloat too much over the limited extent of our victories here let me just say that i never did dream that i'd be walking into a case that above anything else i've ever heard of much less been involved in directly does this nasty affair of the cobain murder exist as the ultimate textbook case of just exactly what is the problem with the growing phenomenon of mindless corruption and hypocrisy in these united states today this guy's got a flair you got to give him that i didn't i was

not expecting it to be so kind of nerdy sounding that nasally i have a big vocabulary kind of voice that's not i don't know what i was expecting i like it and it makes sense now that i hear it but that's not what i was expecting i expected something a little bit more marble mouthed

I just, my memory from it was that, because I used to watch this, like, I watched a lot of public access, but I just remember he, I don't remember him ever making a coherent point about what it was he was saying happened. I mean, we knew what he was alleging, but it wasn't like he didn't ever produce like a smoking gun or like, you know, any sort of evidence or even like, you know, made up evidence. This is a real roll of the dice. We're now in the studio with him where he is taking calls on public access television. 206-517-8165 was apparently the number. This, by the way, he's in the same studio where I once was doing that conservative TV interview show and started hearing the Taco Bell drive-thru in my earpiece. This is all happening in the same place. So let's just, if you'll indulge me, I just want to see what the calls were like in 1996 to this public access TV show.

In the case of the newspapers and the TV stations locally and, you know, corporations that are dealing with billions of dollars on the network level. And you ask yourself, well, you know, why is it that they were willing to write off Kurt Cobain so quickly? And, of course, part of what we've contended on this program is that, you know, Kurt Cobain was just like that character who was shot at the top of the Space Needle in that fictional film starring Warren Beatty, you know, the parallax viewer. He dies at the moment, or he says he's possibly a little bit too independent for his own good, so people say. And, you know, it seems to me that...

Richard's really not letting the caller get a word in edgewise here. It's really frustrating. Maintaining control.

In a world of mega-media monopolies, some guy who's able to generate hundreds of millions of dollars with his own rock band, and who has opinions about things, is setting himself up in a very interesting position, so I would think. But so I think we think many of the people in media corporations, he's setting himself up in an extremely dangerous position because, you know, the power is supposed to rest with the nameless, faceless corporations, like a Daniel Shore, you know, did that.

I thought he was going to implicate NPR's Daniel Shore. I think he's citing something Daniel Shore said.

Is Daniel Shore on this guy's list, too?

Well, he is another Richard. He was on Richard Nixon and Richard Lee's enemies list.

Anyway, that's fascinating tape.

i could see that being something that uh if i ever do get by one of those projectors you have oh yeah i could see myself projecting that pouring myself a tall glass of something and just watching because for me i mean even though that's sort of nonsense it is that is so rooted in a period of my life because that was when we we would all watch public access tv a lot and i mean sort of ironically but but to the point where we really knew the people there was a woman who uh her name was shannon kringen aka the goddess kring and she would paint shoes so she would have like women's shoes and she would paint them but she was also nude while she would do this so you know that was a biggie there was this guy richard lee and there was a bunch of others and like we would all just talk about these people like these were characters in our lives these people that were on public

access that's really cool and that's also cool i i love the regionalism of that as well like And Kurt Cobain, I think of as a national figure because I loved him, too. That was, like, one of my favorite, favorite bands. And I was in Ohio, right? And so being out here now and having conversations with you and Camaro Kev and other people who grew up here and kind of hearing about the – I can't explain it. I know that you're not talking about the music scene and playing this wackadoo cable access guy, but, like, the fact that there's also this rootedness to that whole story here as well is, i don't know i'm just fascinated by local local connections like that and regionalism and i don't know i a lot of people make the argument that it's being erased with the internet i don't know if that's entirely true but um well the internet just kind of at least preserved that one thing but i guess maybe yeah although maybe it's you know Thank you.

TikTok is the new public access television or something, you know?

Yeah, I'll tell you one thing. A lot of dogs can't live with cats, and that's kind of a problem here. I'm looking at Benny, who is basically a one-year-old foxhound. Looks like, you know, again, medium-sized dog that I could see myself spending some time with, but can't live with cats. But also one thing I'm learning off of this adoption site is there is a real art to the spin of getting a dog adopted. Let me read to you about these are the first lines about Benny. You read between the lines. Benny is a young, excitable boy who, typical of his breed, likes the sound of his own voice. He is a very fun dog to be around and super bright. And he's looking for experienced owners who are used to similar breeds. He'd shoot an active family, taking him on lots of adventures, which will tire him out, both physically and mentally. You can't laze around all day with this dog. So anyway, like, this dog is a lot. Benny has a lot of energy and a lot of voice, but cute as hell.

Well, you got Milo. Same thing. Milo is a handsome poodle slash collie. Milo is from Working Stock, and though a sweet and affectionate boy, he's likely to be a bit of a project. His new family would massively benefit from having good experience or understanding of his breed and be ready to provide with extensive mental and physical stimulation. He's very active and will keep you on your toes as he can get bored easily.

There is a American Bulldog. I'm glad to know that they don't keep American Bulldogs out of London shelters, by the way. So that's nice. Milo. I'm sorry. Cleo is getting up there eight years and two months old. so dang cute she is um but uh adorable dog bigger than her looks weighing in at 30 kilograms i don't

know what that is but that's a lot i think it sounds like it's official if i do this whole thing i'm bringing two dogs back right i'm one thing for me one for you and genevieve yeah

exactly and just and but don't just sneak the other one out making an adventure you gotta cross you gotta cross international boundaries with a sure i need to get a large trench coat

like a kind of you know like the olsen twins pulling a caper and but inside my trench coat will just be multiple mongrel rescues from the better sea neighborhood of london you open like

cruella de vil you open up your yes um so what do we think like i this probably was not the tennessee governor's race right like i think no because the guy's on the phone too right yeah It definitely was not. Yeah, that was another thing I wanted to say. It definitely wasn't from a televised debate, not that it could not that other aspects of Lou's sleuthing couldn't be right. But this is definitely phone tape.

For one thing, I have no shame before another mortal.

Now, it could have been him talking to another candidate, you know, on a radio show. But that wasn't the vibe that I got. I don't. Do you think it's even in the world of politics? Do we want to really do we really want to drill down on this? Because now this morning, I thought I was getting close. I was like Coon Ricky oh wait was that his name no what was yes yeah Coon Rippey or Coon Rippey as soon as I saw that name I was like oh this is it and I was like no no that was a different viral story out of Tennessee and we don't know for sure that this is even Tennessee so if anybody like Lou has any more clues I can get a get us closer here again those clues lose clues TV show I'm writing that down I don't know if um I don't know if this is from the world of politics or not I I had, like, kind of bear-punching vibes or something, or a fight or something.

My memory is that he punched a bear.

Well, no, that's Carl. I mean, it was along those lines, but Carl punched the bear. Is it possible we have two bear punchers? I mean, it's possible. It is possible, but we do specifically have—do you have Carl's world there?

I'm trying to find it right now. It's just very strange. I have Carl Castle, R.I.P. Let's see, Carl.

I only have, I have a third, a three. We just did this the other day, right?

This guy's a jerk, but he ain't been back since he got smacked by Carl. So maybe it's not a bear punch, but it was some kind of, it had to do, I believe, with some sort of confrontation. I think so too, yeah. And maybe it was, maybe he thought he saw an alien life form, maybe, you know, I forget what he was confronting, but I feel like there was some kind of confrontation. And I would love to have this solved, Andrew because I'm still high off of that monomena wet and rusting oh yeah kind of you know reveal as it were thanks to the listeners who sent in the correct answers I think it was summer and Matt if I'm doing that from memory correctly that was so satisfying to me to just have that itch in the back of my brain for so you know for a week solid And...

And then to just actually get to where the real answer was, that was that was like the ultimate pulling of a plastic dust cover off of it was like pulling that off of a TV that would be in Cowboy Stadium.

Like it was that satisfying. Like I'm with the listen. Somebody posted on Slack. I never thought Luke would ever find this song. And I don't even mean that as a slam on you, but it just seemed like it was such a mental journey. And it's like the more we the the more songs that were kicked up, the more confusing it could be. And you're trying to just like remember an earworm that can be so hard to grasp as you know what I mean? It's like a it's trying to it's like trying to grab a water balloon that's covered in Vaseline. Anyway, so I was surprised. I don't want to hear about your Friday night. It was Matthew, by the way. I did just do a little because I know that Matthew felt a little bit like you did him dirty in the parlance of the day. But so, yes.

So let's get well, he did. But then in true in true TV, I mean, we tend to I think we tend to draw people to this show that are sort of similar to us. And listener Matthew went through being kind of like, oh, hey, I also sent in the right answer, which was totally true to then being deeply apologetic about having even emailed to say he wrote in the right answer and that his answer had gotten caught in my spam filter. But I thought it was fun. It was a fun little extra kind of, you know, it was like leftovers on the story. It was sort of like, you know, you have a delicious Thanksgiving dinner, and then it's fun to get up the next day and make one of those sandwiches out of the leftovers. So I was fine with it. I don't think listener Matthew had anything to feel chagrined about, but he did. He felt a little embarrassed. And now I want Hawaiian rolls, cranberries sauce. All right, let's take a break. And I am going to be monitoring this website, though, to see when and if Luke the dog goes pending. The reserved is the term that they use over there. And if that doesn't happen by later this week, we may have a new TBTL adventure on our hands. But anyway, let's take this break, come back. I do want to talk about—you actually brought this Nicole Kidman thing up recently, Andrew, because I think in your mind it's kind of the heir to the Tuenti throne. Not quite.

Nuvi is the heir to the throne, but I did bring this up.

Maybe it's in the general world of that kind of stuff. Yeah, but we'll talk about it.

But I didn't realize this was a whole thing. I thought I was just having my own observation with Genevieve, so I didn't realize there was a whole subculture around this little trailer.

Well, and Andrew, as I delved into the trailer, I realized something that I think you may have been incorrect about, which may tear our friendship apart.

Oh.

So that's something to listen for.

Maybe I'm thinking of something else. Okay.

May tear our friendship apart when we return here on TVTL. Stay with us.

All right, let's thank some donors of the day.

These are the kindly folks that are making today's episode possible with their financial support. We are starting the conversation with our good friends John and Emily there at APM, Thinking about the next TVTL-a-thon That's on the horizon now When we will once again Ask you to help support the program These are the folks who Who heard our pleas last time around And they've been donating Folks like Sarah Schneider In Duval, Washington Duval, Washington loomed so large In my childhood mind

Can I guess? Is this where you bought the used piano And pulled it home behind your car?

No, good guess, though. That was Baker City, Oregon. That was real far from home in a crummy van that overheats when you try to go over mountain passes. What was your Duval story then? I thought I nailed that. Steve Largent, the Seattle Seahawk great and the hero of my life as a kid because he was a wide receiver. He was a Christian. He was everything that, you know, he was handsome. He lived in Duval. I heard and I always wanted to go to Duval and just I knew somebody who like would mowed his lawn and the idea of getting to Steve Largent was my Jesus and getting to touch the hem of his garment Andrew would have been so big for me getting to mow his lawn would have been a dream come true for me and then of course many years later I saw when he was I mean unfortunately Steve Largent's politics are terrible and he became a congressman from Oklahoma and when I was covering Congress for NPR. I was at some Capitol Hill lunch spot having my lunch and I look over and there's Steve Largent. And I went up and introduced myself and I felt a little bit like I was selling out my... I mean, as a reporter, I'm obviously going to try to report things as neutrally as possible. But internally, I'm...

I'm, you know, not somebody who believes what Steve Largent believes, but as a fan, I was so excited to see him. So going over and kind of fawning and shaking his hand and being like, Mr. Largent, it's so nice to meet you. I was hoping he understood that was a football thing and not a trying to restrict women's choice thing.

By the way, I thought Duvall might be south. It's not. It's directly northeast of me. I am turning northeast. Nice. I am waving in that direction right now. i'm waving over the speaker warehouse towards duval um also there is a nearby town it looks like a tiny tiny town maybe even just a um maybe even just like maybe a swell in the road called novelty washington which i think that oh you know about this huh uh well novelty hill road is a

thing i guess i don't even know there was a town called novelty maybe i'm wrong about that it looked

like it was like maybe a small community called novelty and google maps there is a town called

Portland, Oregon. I'm here right now, and it's also where Yvonne Vorderstrasse is living and donating. Thanks, Yvonne. But thank you for the donation. Absolutely. We'll accept. Jay and Jillian Kelly are in Seattle, Washington, so I guess it's another circle for you, Andrew. Just a 360-degree rotation. Right, right. Waving hello and thanks to Jillian and Jay. Thank you. Robert White is in Issaquah. That's east of you.

That's east. So, okay, right over there.

make notes and over dynamic audio things heather woodford is in gilbert arizona i mean we can we

can say reliably that's south east of you east of me so that's there other waving over the german beer shop william quigley oh shit that's a buddy of mine really indeed he is somebody who volunteers with me on the weekends at pop-up kitchen in fact i have to give him a good uh handshake next time Thank you, William Quigley.

William's charity knows no bounds. He's helping out with the pop-up. He's helping out with this thing. Thanks, William.

In fact, that's a real success story for us, because I'm pretty sure William did not know about the show until I met him. And it was like, I think literally, I think I've said this before, his claim to fame is he is the only person who's actually checked out TBTL after I described it to him. Awkwardly. And probably told him, don't bother checking it out. It's not that good. And now he's a listener, and he has chickens. I know exactly where he lives And I'm waving at his house right now

That's karma for you too I know you get embarrassed when I talk about it this way But I think it's a very nice thing That you and William and the other folks With the Pop-Up Kitchen are doing And the fact that it's Grown the TBTL listenership by one That's not why you do it No it is why I do it But I think it's karma Because you're out there really trying to help people And now those people who are working along with you Are helping us They're helping me put down sports bets on the Super Bowl that don't work out.

That's not why we give to TBTL. That is not why. There's a firewall. You're killing me, Luke. You're killing me.

I could hear your nether regions clenching. No, that's not how that works. We work here for our job. And let me put it this way. If we didn't have donations from the donors of the day and the dazzling donors and everybody else, Lord knows our APM bosses would they would say it's been nice having you here but that's the only way we're able to do the show is thanks to the support of our donors so thank you very very much

Hello and welcome to Top Story

Like we were just saying kind of before the break Andrew you had brought this Nicole Kidman AMC commercial up which apparently has become quite the sensation amongst a certain kind of hardcore movie-attending crew. Miles Klee was writing about it over at Mel Magazine, which is back, baby. Yeah, you have kind of a Mel roundup today. It just so happened that, I mean, the Futurama story, which we may or may not get to today, may end up being tomorrow. But I had seen that elsewhere, but I just also so happened to see it in Mel, so that's why both of the links are from there. But this story is definitely, this Nicole Kidman thing is very much the kind of enterprise reporting that I love that Mel Magazine does, where they just take some very kind of random-seeming thing and really flesh it out or go figure out the source on it. So Miles Klee is writing about this Nicole Kidman AMC ad. The tagline is, we make movies better. In fact, you know what? I'll just start by playing it. I have the tape right here. So it's Nicole Kidman showing up at a movie theater. The movie theater is empty, but she's very excited to be there. She's very wide-eyed. This is this ad.

We come to this place for magic. We come to AMC theaters to laugh, to cry, to care. Because we need that, all of us. That indescribable. indescribable feeling we get when the lights begin to dim and we go somewhere we've never been before not just entertained but somehow reborn together dazzling images on a huge silver screen sound that i can feel somehow heartbreak feels

good in a place like this our heroes feel like the best wow that's a line yeah no i've somehow heartbreak feels good in a place like this i have seen i've been going to a lot of movies lately so

i've seen this um little bit of tape like about three or four times in the past like three weeks i have i have a lot to say i was as dan lebtard would say i was loud wrong about something but

continue with the tape part of us and stories feel perfect and powerful because here

they are amc theaters we make movies better i actually think that line is really good though here is where heartbreak or whatever she said i actually think it's a really i actually think it's a compelling it's not the worst pitch as somebody who you're not loves going to the theater

And you're not wrong There has become like on Twitter A lot of people who talk about Quoting this thing Like Rocky Horror Picture Show style Like verbatim As Nicole Kidman is saying it In the intro Somebody wrote on Twitter Let's see I've been to four movies in the last ten days And at three of them Nearly sellout crowds have recited The Nicole Kidman AMC commercial script Like a sing-along That was on Valentine's Day Somebody named Wes was tweeting that out What's kind of funny, too, is this started, I think, with people being a little bit ironic about it or kind of making a little bit of fun of it about the fact that, like, well, somebody wrote on Twitter, of all of the celebrities on Earth, there are none less likely to have ever stepped foot into an AMC than Nicole Kidman, which is kind of a decent point. Somebody also said, somebody named Jesse said, I saw the new AMC promo starring Nicole Kidman, which Kipps Bay, that's a place, played fully and heavily out of focus, right through the tag about AMC making movies better. Then they played the entire movie slightly miss-sized, masterful, perfect AMC branding, no notes. That was what Jesse wrote. And then somebody wrote, when you die, Nicole Kidman watches your life in an empty AMC theater And determines your fate by pointing her thumb up or down But what started with people just kind of, you know, mildly gently roasting it Has turned into apparently this really deep sort of love and appreciation for this thing Because for one thing, Miles Klee writes in the piece It's the thing that happens right before the actual movie starts So there's almost that kind of Pavlovian association with it where you're kind of happy it's playing because it tells you that you're about to see a movie. And if you go to a lot of movies, you just get kind of trained. Then at some point, they started only playing a 30-second version of this AMC promo. And that had all these people who love, like, quoting it back to the screen upset. So the person behind the American – have you ever seen this American brand memes Twitter feed? I don't think so Americana brand memes I think it seems very up your alley Paul F. Tompkins retweets him a lot I mean it's really high concept A lot of it kind of goes over my head But the only way I can describe it is This person that runs this Americana memes Just kind of grabs Very what seemed to be sort of random And disparate pieces of like pop culture You know freeze frame of a reality TV show Or a thing and then kind of like Stitches them together into this like Sort of narrative that ends up being a funny commentary on life if that makes any sense you just kind of have to look at it but the person behind americana memes loves the long version of the kidman thing and so that person started a gofundme release the kidman cut to try to get people to sign up to um i guess it maybe it wasn't

a gofundme it was one just one of those like petition websites trying to get amc to go back to playing the full 60 second nicole kidman thing which they did apparently it worked they they went back to playing the longer version because people were outraged they had cut it to

30 seconds um i have a lot of thoughts on this just as something that like when i saw this in the show sheet today i had that weird feeling of like i thought that i can explain i had a i wouldn't say a mild obsession with this but this was something that i've again because i love going to movies and this is a this is so clearly something that is aimed at people like me let's keep these movie theaters in business okay bud like you're here during a pandemic so let's remember why this is special and let's keep going to the theaters and i've had all these thoughts about it as you see it over and over again uh i didn't

realized that i was both kind of missing out on the cultural conversation about it but then also sort of felt like oh this thing that felt very personal to me wasn't like this thing that is in thousands of theaters around the country what other people noticed it too one of the artistic decisions that i think is interesting in this is that nicole kidman is in a theater all by herself Now, every time I have seen this trailer has been, obviously, this is a product of the pandemic and the fact that people aren't going to theaters. Every movie I've been to in the past few weeks has had maybe a tops five people in the theater. I snuck in to watch a little bit of the beginning of Jackass while I was waiting for Genevieve. And I would say that would probably that was the biggest theater. And maybe that had 10 people in it or maybe, maybe 15. But like the experience of going to movies right now is weird because you get a theater almost to yourself, which is kind of cool, but also kind of scary. If you like going to the movies, you're like this, this American experience may be going away forever if I'm the only person in this theater right now. And it's weird that or it's interesting, I should say, that when they cut this trailer, they would put her in a movie theater by herself because it almost sort of, I don't know, magnifies the idea that it's a really weird time to see movies. You know what I mean?

Yeah, that had to be a conversation that they had, because if they were to put her in a theater with a bunch of other people, I feel like that would also strain credulity, because it'd be like, really, Nicole Kidman just going to the AMC and sitting around with the hoi polloi?

And you have to cut it. You have to film this during COVID. You know what I mean? Right. They must have also just been like, well, for safety's sake, we can't pack a bunch of people in this room and have Nicole Kidman walk in.

Right I'm sure there were many many conversations About what the best look was And they landed on empty pristine theater Because we're talking about the idea of movie theaters Not trying to do a documentary style Kind of documentation of what it's actually like Or something I mean that's stylistically where they landed But it is kind of Yeah it does emphasize this idea That you know We are still to this day Not totally comfortable Most of us going back into spaces like movie theaters It's certainly not as casual as it, you know, would have been before the pandemic.

Now, you said that I was wrong about something that could hurt our relationship. I don't know why this would hurt our relationship. But do you know what I'm saying I was loud wrong about? Yes, I had a hot take on this when I first saw this the other day.

OK, so you're not so. But see, I didn't know that you were going to fall on your loud wrong sword over this. I was wondering if if there was going to be potentially an argument about if she, in fact, had an American or Australian accent. I didn't know if you were going to kind of dig your heels in on that. And that's where I saw our friendship falling apart. No, no, I see.

I have I've sketched out so many ways our friendship is going to fall apart. I have a notebook. I have binders, dude. But this isn't one of them. But no, I honestly feel I feel kind of gaslit. I mean, I'm sure I'm just gaslighting myself here because, like I said, I've seen this in the theater several times. And my joke, as I made it on the show, was my humorous observation. This is public radio. I don't do jokes. I do humorous observations. Was that Nicole Kidman is playing Nicole Kidman here, but she doesn't have an Australian accent. She has an American accent. And then I listen to that now through headphones, and it's so clear she has an Australian accent. Right. And I can't tell, did I see the 30-second one and the lines were slightly less? I think I'm looking to cover myself here, but I think I'm just wrong. I just didn't hear it in the theater somehow.

It's very subtle, though. And if the 30-second cut just so happens to not have – there's a big four or five places where you hear it. But if the 30-second cut got rid of two of those places, I could very much – I could see a universe in which – And you're eating popcorn, and maybe you're whispering to Genevieve. There's stuff going on. It's easy to.

We come to this place for magic. We come to AMC theaters to laugh, to cry.

Like, laugh is one of them. But there's like, there's really, it's pretty subtle. Like, I don't think, I don't think you were loud. Well, I think you were incorrect, but not loud incorrect.

You were like, you know, a little noisier than you needed to be wrong, but not loud wrong. I do like the sentiment now, though, and now that I do know that there are dozens of us, dozens, somebody tweeted, if AMC ever pulls this, there will be rioting in the streets. I don't know if that's one of those that you just read, but I feel the same way now. Like, if I ever go to an AMC theater, they don't play this. I want to see this. I want her to be an 85-year-old actor, yet we're still seeing this cut of the AMC trailer. I mean, what's really kind of funny about it is this cost $25 million, or this was part of a $25 million national advertising campaign, which clearly AMC launched out of just sheer terror, right? Like our industry, our business model is collapsing. um but what's interesting is that and i don't know if this if the people that are on twitter getting excited to quote nicole kidman nicole kidman back to nicole kidman i don't know if that's a statistically significant number of moviegoers but it it sort of it sort of seems to support the argument that this was kind of a success for amc like they made this thing that's very earnest and that usually when and you know the ceo of the company that's one of the things miles clee points out on the piece is like the ceo of amc was like tweeting this out very you know cinema history is being made by amc theaters as it launches its 25 million dollar plus national advertising campaign never done before by any theater chain our magical and powerful commercials star oscar winner nicole kidman explaining why seeing a movie at an amc is so incredibly special like that's just the corniest corporate gobbledygook and like usually That kind of stuff just doesn't work. But it would seem that at least with a crew of frequent movie theater attendees, this thing has kind of actually been a success. Yeah.

I mean, somebody in this article that you sent me talked about their journey with this. Clearly, this is somebody who goes to the movies a lot. I also think this is very much an L.A. story. You know, it sounds like there are more people who are dedicated to going to see movies in L.A. That this is a culty thing. And then with the what is the theater that just closed recently, the panoramic arc light, the arc light closing. It sounds like people are like I just don't think people in Seattle are are chanting along with this at the AMC Pacific Place 10 or whatever.

You're probably right. The reason I had that, oh, my gosh, was because on Saturday when I was still in Los Angeles, I popped by that vegan restaurant that I really like called Little Pine, and I'm sitting there having some late lunch, and these two people in their 20s who clearly work in film and television, probably as, like, production assistants, were having their lunch, and they were just, like, they had seen every movie that's ever been made in the last. They both had like whatever the passes are That allow you to go to as many movies as you want They were both going to different movies that night They had both like they were And it was I found it to be quite adorable Because they were younger people kind of starting off in life Clearly loved the world of Hollywood The world of movies They were just there for it And all their friends were working kind of you know Low level jobs in the industry I was like well these people might be You know then maybe one of these is the next you know Steven Spielberg or whatever But they were also complaining about having been assigned to work on the show Dr. Pimple Popper and how much they didn't like that, but that they needed to get paid because I assume they probably work for like a production company that they just sort of if you're making something like at some level of the production where it's like you just get hired out to different shows that are filming and some days it's really fun and you're working with, you know, interesting stars and some days it's Dr. Pimple Popper.

You know, that is one thing I miss about living in L.A. is that, like, everybody is just so tuned in to the business of Hollywood, right? And because a lot of people are probably trying to make it in that business in one way or another. And I just have, like, a memory. I think I was hanging out with, like, Genevieve and I think our friend Angie, who's been on this show before, and maybe a couple of other people. And we were in a bar somewhere, and we were talking about Brooklyn Nine-Nine, I want to say, or something related to it. And you know me, I can never remember anybody's name in a conversation, celebrities, Nicole Kidman being a perfect example of that, ironically. And I was having some conversation with them, sitting at the bar, kind of, you can, especially a couple of drinks in, you can sometimes forget that the bartender can hear everything because they're over there like, you know, polishing glasses or whatever they do with a towel over their shoulder. And I'm just talking to my gang, and I can't remember anybody's name. And I just remember him coming over, and he just said, hey, sorry to interrupt, but you're thinking of Andre Brower, blah, blah, blah, da, da, da, da, da. And he just rattled off 15 things that I had just sort of glossed over. And he's like, and also, here's this information. I was like, this guy has probably either worked on that set or wants to work on that set or knows somebody. That is something about L.A., like not even the glamorous side of it being a company town, but just the fact that it's a company town. I found that really interesting living there. Can you get that guy to work on TBTL? Like just as no, no, just as like a as kind of our as our faction. checking cuz just that would be kind of great if we just had someone standing just off mic who could holler the correct fact name whatever as we're constantly

getting things wrong well I'll tell you one thing I did get a note from our pal John in the membership department this morning saying hey man anytime you want to talk about Marvel I'm right over here don't forget about is deep deep deep in that world he said I said oh yeah I was kind of cringing thinking about you listening to our conversation about the Marvel Universe given that you and I are not super well steeped in it and he said no everybody did a good job until somebody said that Superman punched Hitler that was obviously Captain America I was like yeah that was Luke

I read one book on the Marvel Universe

so I know everything about it people it was Nicole Kidman I believe who punched Hitler who punched Hitler yes

here I go once again with the email every week I hope that it's from a female oh man It's not from a female.

All right. Emails, V-mails, D-mails, G-mails. What do we got?

Yeah, I have a couple of joke mails, let's call them. Okay, J-mails. These are J-mails. Now, I think I alluded to this earlier in the show. We had a couple of kids, a couple of regular callers. Oh, these kids are workshopping a joke. Langley and Puddle called in with a joke. Now, I never thought.

Langley, I love Langley.

Never thought. And Puddle.

I love Puddle, too. No offense.

Puddle, I believe, is younger. And so just starting to kind of ramp up to the calling in the public radio podcast game. And I'm hesitating here because it's weird that I'm going to give a trigger warning on a child's joke. But maybe, you know, I will say this joke gets a little bit dark. And you can even hear their dad in the background say, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, girls, that's a little dark. Take a listen to take a listen to this from Langley and Puddle.

Hello, this is Langley, and my sister would like to have a joke. I will translate it for you at the end. Hello, my name is Petal. I have to go tell you, why did the monkey cross the road? Because to kill himself. Why did he do that? That was, why did the monkey cross the road? To kill himself. That's a little dark girl.

that's a little dark girls that's a little dark

so is it like the dad's phone just happens to have the tbtl voicemail line like programmed into it somewhere and like langley and puddle just commandeered it it sounds like they're in the backseat of the car and their dad is like oh that's that's going that's going on the imaginary radio

I like that it cuts off too girls that's a little dark and then you can hear just like one more consonant before the line goes dead So anyway, reaching for the phone, that was dark. And so they called back because they wanted to work on it a little bit.

We workshopped that joke. And this is angry. And Petal has changed it. What is it now, Petal? Why did the monkey cross the road? To show that he didn't have the brain. Bye. Much better. Why did the monkey cross the road? to show that you didn't have a brain. Goodbye. Thank you. Thank you.

Oh, my gosh. That's so great. I love it. That's legitimately got me. Just workshopping jokes. Just workshopping jokes.

Driving around town, wherever that town is. 206-414-TBTL. If anybody has a joke that they want to workshop. I mean, I think that's mostly why we're here, right? Keep them light. Yeah, keep them.

Keep them lighter than those two adorable young angels who called in and talked about dark topics.

Dark, dark topics. Do you want to talk about water for a second here? Do you have time for this?

You know, I used to tell a joke when I was a kid. I would tell, this is such a bad joke. Some adult must have said it. I don't mean bad like it's inappropriate. It's just a dopey joke. It was, why did the chicken cross the road? because he was snagged on the punk rocker's earring? Like, I don't, I mean, that was like a joke that I heard that had things in it like, that made me think, I had heard, oh, someone, I didn't make that up. Somebody told that joke or I read that joke in a joke book. Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was snagged on or stuck on the punk rocker's earring, which is such a lame joke. But for some reason, I thought, Like I didn't understand it But I thought Well this is funny To people who get it Yeah right Repeating that joke a lot When I was a kid Assuming I just I just didn't have All the relevant context For why it was funny But That it was funny But now that I'm older I realize no It's just a shitty joke Is there any chance Not that I'm trying to like Um Argue with Your memories here But is there any Chance that you read that And there was actually A subtle bit of wordplay That you didn't quite get That it wasn't just Straightforward like that Yes That totally And then you just Kind of glossed over that Because you didn't get it And that made the joke Totally null and void Uh Very very possible

Are you looking for it now? Yeah, I was trying to find it, and there's a different version of it. Why did the punk rocker cross the road? Because he had a chicken stapled to his face. Also makes no sense. Because I'm seeing a lot. And this is actually something.

Barbara Kingsolver quotes this book. I'm looking for. Of the Poisonwood Bible? I believe so. And for some reason, I'm getting a result in GoogleBooks.com. So this is like a book result. Somewhere in her book, she writes, After dinner, Roberta sips wine and tells Lonnie the joke about the punk rocker crossing the road with a chicken for an earring. Whoa! So now I'm wondering if it was a punk rocker crossing the road with a chicken for an earring. I mean, that's very similar to what you're saying. Like, it was attached to the punk rocker. I mean, who would have thought that this would have taken us to Barbara Kingsolver? Barbara Kingsolver town? Yeah, like, that's not what I was expecting here. Me neither. That's why you play the game, though, Andrew. That is why you play the game. Now I have another mystery.

Every time we get close on one mystery, another one opens up. You play the game to hear very dark jokes from very adorable children and to end the show on a Barbara Kingsolver reference.

You know this is blue, but you know the one joke that I made up as a kid, right?

You've probably told it to me before, and I've probably forgotten it.

It's real cringy and inappropriate, but what do you call two bugs making love?

I don't know. What do you call two bugs making love? Insects.

I was young. I was figuring stuff out. That's not bad. It's also not blue. I was figuring out it involves adult content.

Well, we got to earn that. We got to earn that warning, my friend. Exactly. That's not bad. That is not a bad joke. I mean it follows a certain kind of logic

You don't say What were you guys doing we were in sex You don't say that But you can see I was getting you know I was getting close I was trying

That's a much I mean that's a lot better than Why did the chicken cross the road Because it was stuck on the punk rocker's earring I'm wandering around Seattle telling people That joke with a straight face I'm trying to figure out this joke Then just lots of things that were probably racist That I didn't even understand That they were racist For one reason or another Because again, as a kid You're repeating jokes that you've heard adults say Or that you read in a joke book And you don't even get the joke most of the time So, you know If you heard me tell an off-color or racist joke In Seattle in the early 1980s I want to apologize I knew not what I was speaking of

I am going bananas here Looking for Because why in this novel Do they just mention in passing The joke about the punk rocker with the chicken earring and is that related or not or is that just something totally random that is made up and now I'm like I'm looking for whatever joke King Solver's talking about but anyway

well let me tell you this the Poisonwood is it from the Poisonwood Bible no I don't think so here let me see

what it was

because if we can figure out when the book came out that'll tell us something

what book am I looking at here sorry this is a little bit

because basically I would have been very very very very young when I'm telling this joke. So I would have been probably between six and eight. So that would mean 1982 through 1984 would be roughly the range when I'm hearing this joke. Meaning if it's any time after that, that tells us something.

Well, turns out I was wrong about something. This is not a book by Barbara Kingsolver. This is a book called Reading Barbara Kingsolver by Lynn Houston and Jennifer Warren in 2009. I am getting so confused here. So this is some sort of a meta. These are some writers who are writing a novel. I guess co-writing a novel? I guess, yeah, co-writing a novel, and it's called Reading Barbara Kingsolver. So sorry, everybody. This is getting real. This is so confusing, Ron. This is so confusing. This is so confusing.

But I feel, but I feel, one, I'm sure we'll have an update tomorrow on both Luke the Rescue mongrel and what this punk rock chicken joke is all about. But I'm just glad to know.

That it is referenced somewhere Some version of it is like I didn't just Hallucinate that as a child Like there's some there's something Going on with that joke where it was bouncing around The culture for whatever reason and I bet you our listeners

Will have some theories as well so this book is a Reading guide this book is not A novel it is a reading guide As an introduction to her works so Okay great just real Just real power out today Walsh

Good job hey hey hey be nice

To my friend Andrew yeah you're right We got to end on an up note because then And that's what I'm going to live with the rest of the day. So let's see. Upnote. Why did the monkey cross the road? Too dark. Too dark, girls. That's too dark. Somebody grabbed the microphone. It's dark.

All right. We did it. Good job. Good job. You got us there, my friend. Hey, we're going to be back here tomorrow with more of this imaginary radio for you. Please do join us for that. Until then, have a great Tuesday. Take care of yourselves. be careful crossing the road

especially if you're a monkey

no mountain too tall

good luck to you all

Hi, my name's Langley. I've been on TBTL before, and I'm going to tell you a joke. Where do the cows go for fun? To the movies. What do you call a frozen rabbit? A hopsicle. Goodbye, TBTL. Power out.