Muse

Tell me one fact that you know about me. Do you not remember one single thing about me?

Dude, things have been nuts around here. I bet you don't know anything about me.

You were born in Phoenix. You went to school in Tempe. You're an only child. Your favorite show is something called The Real Housewives of Atlanta. And your favorite book is Kendall Jenner's Instagram feed. How did you know all that? Because you are constantly talking about yourself. You are the most self-obsessed person I have ever met. You should see Kendall Jenner's Instagram feed. TBTL!

Hey, baby. T. P.E.P.L.

You want, you can do some, you can.

I used to be with it, but then they changed what it was. Now what I'm with isn't it. And what's it seems weird and scary to me. It may be an ugly world, but at least I have a beautiful face.

I see you exhaling, sir. We're going to be with you in just a moment. You've got to be patient, okay? We're very, very sorry. Our apologies. We apologize to you. You will not have to wait that much longer at all.

All right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Thursday edition of TBTL, Show that just might be too beautiful to live Too loud and too specific My name is Luke Burbank I'm your host Are you sure? That's what they said on Ask Chiefs Coming to you from the Hollywood Broadcast Center Right here in Portland, Oregon Where we are looking at a beautiful California got sunshine Sunny Thursday Episode 3637 In a collector series

Let the fun begin

And we have a, I think we've got a fun show in store for all of you. We've got a furniture-related dilemma.

Well, some chairs make weird noises.

First came up on the show earlier this week. A listener saw a piece of free furniture, like someone was giving away a bunch of stuff. And they wanted to have this piece of free furniture, but it had a note on it.

Listen, please, please, please. If anybody doesn't know the difference between a Valance and a Jabot, I really need you to leave.

The note said, I'm going to come back for this later today, so please don't take it. Raising the question, what are the rules around free stuff like this? And if you can, reserve it with just a flimsy note.

It's okay!

So we will reset that story. We'll talk to a recognized expert on the topic of free roadside furniture, one Genevieve has from the After These Messages podcast. and we'll also hear from another listener who's dealing with, I guess, something similar but Andrew has told me something on a much larger scale so I'm all ears about that and because it's a Thursday, a.k.a. a Blur's Day we will do the Blur's Day messages do all of that with the help of this young man longest running co-bro of the show maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships he is currently, as we speak He is, what would you say, he's in charge of, he's the proud owner of not one, but two separate garbage situations at two different locations in Seattle. That's rich.

That's it.

He is basically a garbage baron in Seattle, where he's joining us right now from the Roosevelt neighborhood. Good morning, my friend. He's Andrew Walsh, by the way.

Good morning, Luke. I just had something very interesting pop up on the TBTL Slack channel. What do you think of this? This just came in, like, moments ago. Well, 10.09. 10.09 this morning. We're recording at 10.27. Jonathan posts, this is random, but did anyone catch Luke saying something like, hey, puppies, in the background of Wednesday's show around the 1849 mark? Probably just some dogs out the window and a missed mic mute, but I got a chuckle out of it. I went back to the tape. I didn't I didn't hear anything around there. Did you have any recollection of saying, hey, puppies in the background of the show? Yes.

No, I think what I probably said was too many glockies, which is a tick tock thing that is going around. It's a dance. It's some hip hop song that I am only familiar with that four seconds of it where people are doing a dance over and they're singing too many glockies. And you said something that was like too many of something. And it made me think of here. I'm just, this is something off of YouTube, too many glockies challenge. As you know, Andrew, whenever we just play something cold from YouTube, it usually turns out great. It's rarely like just an automated voice, automated robot voice over some like still picture.

or is it someone's using the push function on their editing software? So that's probably what this will be. But let's just see if we get the too many glockies sound. Good. We're getting some kind of annoying intro from whatever this YouTube service is.

Too many glockies. I got a drum. He got the one with a stick. We'll set it off in his face. Thinking it's sweet. Smack his head off his blick. Too many glockies.

So what you heard me saying was too many glockies, not hey there puppies.

I see. And is a glockie, what is a glockie? Do I want to know? I think it's a gun. I was going to say, okay, yeah, I was wondering if it was maybe a gun or a hot dog. I know hot dogs are glizzies. That's a glizzy. Right. Andrew, come on. I know.

Please don't embarrass yourself. I know. I'm sorry.

By confusing your glockies and your glizzies. Don't confuse your glockies. Boy, that would be an unfortunate situation in both cases. My dad taught me, never bring a glizzy to a glocky fight. Al, do you have anything to say at the top of the show? because I need to write down that show title, but it's really long. Something My Dad Told Me. Oh, no, no.

How about just never bring a glizzy to it? I guess bringing a glizzy to a glocky fight would be way worse because you brought a hot dog to a gun fight. Right, right, right. If you brought a gun to a hot dog fight, you're escalating things quickly, but presumably he would win that fight. You're really changing the vibe Significantly though Well, yes, and then the other person Has to try to match your energy Yeah, I'm just trying to match your energy, dude You know what? I'm super excited about two things today, Andrew One, that that listener heard me Quietly mutter too many glockies in the background Like, I can't believe how astute that listener is So I really am excited about three things I'm excited about that I'm excited that we're doing Live Wire tonight At the Alberta Rose Theater I would encourage folks to come down And watch the show If you're in the greater Portland area I'm also planning on starting the program Andrew by promoting TBTL

Of course, I'm sure you will Introduce yourself as Luke Burbank of TBTL I'm Luke Burbank of the podcast TBTL

So that's going to be fun Jamie Loftus will be there Who is the genius Person behind a number Of podcasts that are pretty great The one we're going to be talking about is called the act cast it's sort of about the kathy cartoon the kathy comic but not just like dunking on it just being kind of like why was this so popular where does it actually fit into the culture what does it say about feminism etc um that's kind of her specialty she did one about lolita that was really interesting about just that the cultural impact of the book lolita so that's all happening tonight i'm also very excited andrew that they friggin found the endurance under the weddell sea earnest shackleton's ship that was caught in the ice in like like 1915 or something and then was was was destroyed mostly and then sunk to the bottom 10 000 feet to the bottom of the weddell sea and they went and they found it and there's this video and it's so freaking cool i i didn't

see that but i did send you something earlier about this ship i can't remember the name of it That was found in one of the great lakes. Was it Lake Huron? I don't think it was Huron. But, oh, Star Tribune. You gave me the article once for free, but then you take it back, don't you? You take it back without my very Midwest. Very passive aggressive. I wish I could remember the lake.

Oh, yeah. You didn't want to pay for it? Okay.

Oh, okay. You enjoyed it once, though, didn't you? Anyway, yeah. Are you I am sorry for my thickness here. I feel very I don't know why I'm in a great mood. I'm very happy to be doing the show today. I got to admit, I feel very kind of distracted and yeah, kind of dizzy today. Not literally. I don't think I'm going to fall down. That was last week's topic. Think about how you're I always worry about you washing your feet in the shower, Luke, because you're going to fall down.

I'm pretty close to I'm going to start outfitting my apartment with all the things my grandma had at her condo in Bellevue. Yes, right. Grip tape in the shower, some, like, butterfly decals on the sliding glass door so you remember that it's glass.

Mm-hmm. That's smart. Also, wouldn't it hurt you to put some plastic coverings down on your couch and chairs, you know? Did you have that? My grandmother had that.

My grandmother did not have that, but that is a very grandmotherly thing. But thank you, Andrew, for your concern. Basically, if you don't hear from me, other than when we're supposed to be sleeping. So from roughly the hours of 11 p.m. till 6 a.m. Other than that, if you don't hear from me every three hours, will you please follow up? Because I probably have slipped in in the tub or had some sort of old person accident here at my apartment. This is.

gonna be the next apple watch commercial right like isn't the one the guy is he jogging through the woods when he goes missing or maybe biking i think that's one of them oh by the way update on

that i fixed my own apple watch situation remember how oh yeah my watch was not working as a phone even though i was paying money for it to be a phone and it just didn't work for some reason well i don't know somehow in the process of futzing with it and turning it on and off and resetting a few things i was able to do what the actual professionals the trained professionals at verizon were not able to do which is i was able to have my watch turned back into being a telephone which means if i'm ever out jogging in forest park or something here in portland and i do fall over supposedly the watch will call someone for me how did you solve it i don't know i just know that i was trying to well one i got a new iphone so that probably helped but it didn't it didn't happen immediately my old phone had a bit of a crack in the corner and it was getting larger and so I I just bit the bullet I got a new phone a couple weeks ago and initially it was still I was still getting this error message from my watch saying no like there's no sim card or whatever and then I don't know just through the process of turning it on and off I uninstalled the the app the watch app from my phone and then I reinstalled it somehow I shook something loose in there and so now it works as a phone again i don't i doubt i'll be getting my 112 back or whatever amount of money i paid to verizon during the time during the period of time right and as the person told me one of the people i talked to who was nice enough but they said i said can i get up can you prorate that for me because i was paying 10 bucks a month for this to be a phone and it wasn't a phone and they said yeah but see in our system it says it works so that's why we're not able to refund you and i said well interesting yeah because i'm in a verizon store that was a kind of a weird day i want to get back to this shackleton thing in a minute but that was a um it was an interesting day so i go to the verizon store and the person there is trying to help me and then she basically calls the one this was the second verizon store i'd been to that day remember the first one i went to was called like an express or something and i walked in the person said this is basically like you're going to our website because remember they had no computers in there which i knew was a problem for me so i went to the second location and i'm talking to the person and their solution is to call the 1-800 number which again i could have done from my house but as we're sitting there this was like maybe the day after russia's incursion into ukraine and this huge pro ukraine rally just came marching down the street all these people holding the flag of ukraine and had painted their faces and had made signs and were like ringing cowbells and stuff and I'm just sitting there trying to deal with this watch but I was like this is that was one of the things that made that told my brain this is a sort of a historic thing you know like this is this is something that is obviously going to be quite memorable for all of us and again

it's more than memorable for the people who are in danger or have been harmed already by it so I'm not trying to center my experience but it was just this kind of weird moment where I'm sitting you're dealing with a watch situation all of a sudden here oh here goes the um world war three is starting and here's the protest against world war three and they're just walking by this verizon

store in downtown portland it's like it reminds me of a scene out of like a um kind of pre-apocalyptic yes uh comic book like who am i thinking like a frank miller comic book or something like that you know like it's just going on and i feel like that's something that goes on in watchmen a lot too right the comic book watchmen there's there's always the person who we later learn who it is but there's always a person with a picket sign kind of in the background.

Yes. There's a lot of just like social unrest. Although I would describe what was going on there as social rest or maybe unrest at Vladimir Putin. But like just there's something going on just kind of like background noise of protests and of people being riled up and stuff. I feel like that's constantly in the background of Watchmen and stuff like

Yeah. Oh, I see.

Yeah. anyway I'm I've always been sort of obsessed with this Ernest Shackleton story because I'm and I'm I'm guessing you know about I mean it's probably one of the more famous kind of disaster stories of our time one because it happened it happened recently enough that they have photographs of it and also because everybody survived I mean that's the wildest part of this story I don't know if I really need to like explain it to listeners maybe i can explain it to my nieces maddie mary sit down i'm gonna tell you a story about ernest shackleton no i mean what was happening

was a plastic cover on that chair before you sit down please thank you maddie uh yeah so

shackleton and his his his his crew his team of people were i think trying to get to the south pole or get to some spot in antarctica and they were in this ship the endurance that was supposed to be very hardy and able to get through lots of stuff but they got caught in the ice and it was a very weird it was like a slow motion disaster because as the ship was the ship was getting further and further into really kind of like icy water and where the water is you know sort of starting to really freeze up around the boat and then eventually the boat's just trapped and then eventually the ice is just crushing the boat so they're trying to get everything off the boat now they're camping on the ice and so they had to like march out of there and there's these crazy photos of them standing like they're standing on the ice now outside of this boat they're in the freaking middle of nowhere literally and they're smiling in the photo the crew like one guy smoking a pipe they look pretty chill considering what their circumstances are. This is pre-cell phone, by the way. This was like none of their Apple watches worked. Oh, really?

Their watches weren't phones? None of their watches were phones. What do you think one of these fellas would have said to you if you went up to them and you said my watch used to be a phone but now it's not a phone anymore.

They would say, he's gone mad. Put him in the brig. He's got scurvy. Yes. And so they basically salvaged what they could from the boat. The boat was eventually compromised, destroyed by the ice. They also took photos of the boat being sort of taken down into the the watery depths of the wet lc the crate one of the most interesting parts of the story to me is that there was a photographer or there was somebody he probably had like five jobs but one of them was the official photographer of this expedition and he had all these glass i don't really understand photographer you actually might know a lot more about this than i do andrew but he had these basically glass slides of some kind that were his like photographs he'd already taken maybe they were like undeveloped or something and they were in the ship and he dove i thought i was you know a mr tough guy for swimming in san francisco bay a couple months ago this guy dove underwater into the ship repeatedly to get his photographs these glass plates or whatever they were out of the like hull of the ship and then they friggin dragged all this stuff across the ice to god knows where and that's why we have all these photographs of of this expedition gone gone wrong so they then they basically like somehow they make their way to this a place where they basically have found i think it was i i'm gonna mess up part of the story here but they got somewhere that was at least it's like like inhabitable like i don't think it was anything great they didn't get to fiji or something but they got to a place where they could kind of set up a camp i mean they they had to go a huge vast distance over the ice and i think they're like hunting seals to eat and stuff like that and then shackleton and a couple of his uh fellas get into this open boat like i'm talking like a basically a dinghy of some sort and using dead reckoning they sail or they you know i guess sail slash row some ridiculous distance i think they might have ended up on this place called elephant island i'm doing all of this from memory from like 10 years ago when i read a book about it so please forgive me because there aren't many articles on the internet that i could have refreshed my memory with andrew right before bringing this topic up but the point is shackleton and these other guys sail off with no like you know just basically just they're winging it here and they get to they get somewhere where there is civilization enough civilization that they can basically get a rescue ship and they go back they go back and get the dudes they left behind and they all survived nobody died from this thing which is just shocking to this day that this was like everybody lived through this really really extreme event so i almost died when you told me that guy

jumped back in the water like let's oh my god do you think you think he was like decked out in some good rei uh probably diving gear that kept him warm and kept his core body heat up yeah some kind

of neoprene or you know something with with warm water circulating through it yeah well this is the other thing this is how with it these people were on this mission so this south african ice breaking ship doesn't south africa seem like an interesting country for the ice breaking ship to be from yeah like i i mean i know south africa is in the south of africa so i guess if you like if you if you kept going south you would then hit the you know antarctica so i guess it makes sense But I don't think of South Africa itself as being a place that has a huge need for an icebreaker, for like one of the world's more advanced icebreaking ships.

Yeah, that is that is curious. I'm opening up Google Earth now to kind of get a view of the situation.

But so they this the South African expedition went out to try to find. the endurance that the ship itself and what the reason i was saying that the the shackleton folks were so with it somebody had written down the coordinates of where their ship was consumed by the ice so the south african expedition they had a pretty good idea of where this thing was and so based on the coordinates that were that were written down at the time they went and they found it and it is like perfectly preserved because it turns out the little um you know microscopic i don't know even what form of life they are but the the things like if you had a ship sink off of hawaii there would be all these little organisms that would start to just pretty quickly kind of consume and degrade the wood those do not exist 10 000 feet below the weddell ice cap uh over the weddell sea so this thing is like it's as if it sunk last week and there is a shot of the um of the wait the back it's been a long time since i oh the nautical term but or booty i'm sorry the dump truck of the dump truck of the endurance there's just this they send this robot down and they it's like these gold letters that say endurance and it's just like it's perfectly preserved um the whole thing is just amazing so um i'm just i'm as you can tell i've

i've had my flabbergast button pushed by this whole you flaunting that by this oh yeah sure you can say it without stumbling over it um actually look i practiced that all morning look in the mirror flabbergast button flabbergast button um south africa actually like you said it does make kind of the most sense actually given the geography of this that that would be um sort of be it's either argentina the the i guess western tip of australia or south africa like those are the those are the kind of very southern places yeah exactly so that oh that's really interesting also god i forgot how awesome google earth is i haven't been in this i remember when it was new and we're all like what did you play around with google earth when it was yes oh now I'm in this world. I was obsessed.

I know, and you're right. I would spend a good amount of time just on Google Earth, like, how can this even... How do we have this? Who made this? A year goes by and I forget about it.

It reminds me, too, that we all used to have globes. We need just to have a sounder or something for old man talk, because this show is becoming more and more either about us falling in the shower, or back in the day, we had globes like that is such a greg cody back in my day we had globes but it is true like even as it's like a young person like you needed globes for things like if you were doing your your homework or something you needed to reference things like even if we didn't have a fancy study like you had a globe probably at one point in your life or many points well definitely in um

maybe somewhere in our house but definitely any classroom that you walked into certainly yeah you're gonna have a globe in there and here's this now this is gonna this is gonna get real real old man real fast i think we've i do honestly think we've slightly lost something in not needing to have physical globes anymore and here's why because of course google earth is way cooler than any globe we had and there are all these digital things now that are much more informative than that was but they're not you're not turning those on your computer all the time it's not sitting you don't have a dedicated computer that's just sitting in a corner of your house or your um you know classroom necessarily that's just google earth and it's just rotating and the reason i used to just stare at the globe and think about our place on planet earth like i'd be in the classroom i'd be bored i'd be and if it was really fancy it'd be sometimes you'd have a globe that would have the kind of raised surfaces like it would sort of also try to represent topography to some degree i would stare at that globe and i would just i would sort of contemplate my place in humanity and north america's place on the globe and america's place within north america like there was a lot of sort of for my age or whatever my for my brain's capacity a lot of deep thinking that i would do while staring at the globe and kind of daydreaming i never do that anymore because i don't have a globe in my house because I could just get it on Google Earth, but the thing is I don't go on Google Earth and do the same sort of rumination that I used to do when I would just see a physical globe. And also

globes as they were and this is both a deficit and I think a sort of interesting aspect of them is they're also a stamp in time because the last globe I

had, actually I think Genevieve had Rhodesia on it. Yeah, well it had this Burma and Rhodesia

It had USSR on it. And I'm trying to think for some reason I think Genevieve got me that globe Bye.

think this is a weird story actually she's going to be on the show later we can ask her if we remember i think for our very first valentine's day together she got me a globe and it must have been a reference to an inside joke or me bemoaning the fact that i didn't have a globe or something and she got me a globe that we had for a long time but that would have been in about 2001 or 2002 maybe um yeah i guess 2001 and uh and we thought it was kind of interesting that shubert dip yeah exactly i was like um anyway yeah so i was like oh this isn't even you know it's not even an up-to-date globe it was a used globe of course it's like kind of a cute globe from a thrift store or something but it was it still had the ussr it was you know pre uh russia which maybe that globe will come back into fashion sorry no i didn't even say that you thought no that's i said glock i said something about come here glocky glocky yes by the way it was lake superior where this other ship has been discovered the ship is called the atlanta and it's been down there um i think since 1894 uh i was reading this the other day by the way i got this on the detroit free press free can you hear that the free twin cities star tribune free detroit free press no support your journalists anyway um they have this footage because they have these like unmanned um devices that they can send down with cameras of course to explore these things now and the video uh and you can hear it you can't it's almost like drone footage sort of because you can hear the the commentary of two fellas as they're um navigating down you know i don't know how many feet it said 160 maybe feet below the surface of the lake and they're discovering the shipwreck and they're like, is this the Atlanta? I think it is the Atlanta. Oh, look, there's a sink. There's a toilet. I don't know if you watched that video, Luke, but it was really, really fast. It seems like it'd be up your alley. I'll send you this freep.com article.

Well, I did read, I read the article and what I thought was interesting was they mentioned how blasé the local paper was at the time about this huge shipwreck that happened. I believe they said the first of the season.

uh-huh yes like yeah that's one thing that they were saying that like this just happened all the time and there aren't records necessarily of these of who was on these ships because they there is some sort of like paperwork thing that happened once you reached your destination so if you didn't reach your destination there aren't historical records of who didn't make it

right if you didn't get paid that was yeah if you didn't get paid about yeah who did we have to pay Then you're on the record But before that happened It was not important to know that you existed Alright, I did go to Globestore.com, Andrew And buy a globe Did you just do that as we were talking? While we were talking

What era are we looking at?

Let's see, it's Pangaea Oh, that's an interesting globe Yeah, that's how old I am, Andrew When I was in school, our globe was just Pangaea Yeah, buddy okay let's get Genevieve on the show fast your podcast is so old he grew up in Pangea let's get Genevieve on the show ASAP to try to yeah we need save this whole thing right after we take this quick break here on TBTL we was hoping for some razzle dazzle razzle dazzle that's right man

razzle dazzle on your mark on your mark get set get set now ready ready go everybody razzle dazzle

Let's thank some dazzling donors. These are the donors who are dazzling us with the amount of dough that they're... What's another word that sounds like... It starts with a D, but that isn't donate. That isn't donate?

They're delivering to us?

Deliver, Andrew!

I told you, I'm never making another mistake on this show again. No more stumbles.

These are the dazzling donors who are delivering us a dazzling amount of dough. And for that, we thank them and also would like to read a little message. First from Ryan Honick out there in Alexandria, Virginia, a.k.a. Diggstown, USA. That's old school. Ryan says, I can't believe it's time to write a message again. I want to just express my gratitude to you and the community of tens who are always so willing to lift one another up. I was trying to explain this to Becca yesterday when we were on a walk about just like I said, we're getting into the part of the show where we start to read these messages from these dazzling donors. And I said it invariably just turns into the dazzling donors who are supporting the program, who are the only reason we get to do this, saying nice things to us about the show.

Yeah, it is the ultimate scam. It really is. I mean, how did we pull this off?

I don't have the emotional ability to really fully absorb.

it all because i'm broken but um but yeah it's like it's just a it's a it's a really really really amazing thing that people like ryan are keeping tbtl going and then are also taking the

occasion to tell us that they love tbtl yeah exactly people can submit messages about anything by the way i want to make that very clear there's no how boss ryan is yes there's no obligation to praise tbtl you have already praised us when you delivered your dazzling donations the tbtl exactly

But this is very, very sweet Thank you, Ryan Yeah Ryan says Earlier this year I participated in a fundraiser For the Cerebral Palsy Alliance Research Foundation And the 10s came out in full force Helping me raise $5,000 in September Dang Our community continues to rally around one another Whenever we need to Whether it's reminiscing about Mike R.I.P. That's, I believe, a reference to our friend Mike Frizzell Indeed Who we lost this year or helping each other out through personal challenges. These past few months have been particularly challenging for me as the newest resident of Breakup Town. Sorry, Ryan. I thought you were in Diggstown. Yeah. I guess Diggstown is on the border of Breakup Town, sadly.

Yeah, Breakup Town is gateway to Diggstown, unfortunately.

Maybe it was my overuse of the sound machine, Ryan asks. Oh, man, we got to put warnings on those things. Yeah, we do. This could be hazardous to your relationship. amid my incredible sadness i have found such solace in our community this past year i met up with local tens hi steve and jen and got to know others like kelly f helping her with a research project around equitable health care god these people are so selfish i know just out for themselves raising money for cerebral palsy and helping each other on research projects about health care access um while we all you know what it is it's basically like well no i'm not gonna i'm not going to run with that analogy because it's not fair to you oh it's like it's like it's like we're we have through no fault of our own through no no credit to us have somehow accidentally helped bring together this community of people who are just really such a great bunch of folks and so into trying to help everyone else out the analogy i was starting to go with was it was sort like like we're the parents or something and we're like fine whatever we're you know generally try to be okay in the world try to not make things worse but then we have all these kids this is why the analogy is kind of flawed because many of the listeners are older than us but then it's like the next generation or the thing that's been created inadvertently by tbtl is this amazingly

kind network of people eventually we're going to be empty nesters but i don't know how that fits into the analogy but it's going to be you and me just puttering around our podcast house

just moving our moving butterfly decals around different parts of the sliding glass door so while we all hope this show lives forever and that's why we donate isn't it that's right ryan you're picking up what we're putting down i know that regardless i have friendos for life with the secret handshake that is this pod cart and 3600 plus episodes in i can now confidently say that my longest relationship now this is a theme I believe we heard this yesterday from a listener can we get that on a t-shirt somewhere my longest relationship is with TBTL yeah I think that actually would be a pretty a pretty good t-shirt and see previous comments about the sound machine if we have if we have a lot of people mentioning that TBTL is our longest relationship is TBTL the solution or the problem that is

a really good question or is it just a cycle are we bringing people together and then breaking them

up if it ain't broke don't fix it is kind of what i think let's just keep this thing rolling for the time being uh ryan closes with i love you all power out thanks ryan sorry about breakup town but um but hopefully this coming year will um will will involve makeup town with somebody new or make out town make out whatever it is you're looking for yeah i love make out time make out town is sort of like the that's on the other side of this town you gotta get through that's the vegas of this like sim that we're developing where you've got Breakup Town and Diggstown and then if you leave, if you get outside of the county where there's basically no law, that's when you get to Makeout Town.

You know what I realized, Luke? This is kind of embarrassing and we're going to get emails. It's actually Makeout City.

Oh, God. Okay. Everyone, we've got there. You don't have to correct us. Thank you. All right. Maestro.

On your mark. On your mark. Get set. Get set. Now ready. Ready. Go.

Everybody rattle, dazzle.

We've also got to thank Dazzling Donor, Denny Gamur. In Seattle, Washington. Beautiful town. Yeah. Denny says, I would like to extol the virtues of eagle soaring, that is, running. I would also like to plug homebrewing beer as a hobby, as an ancient runner.

I say, quote, if you want to run cool, you've got to run on heavy fuel. Now, what does that mean? Is the beer the fuel? Yeah, I think so. Okay. I think he's, you know, I mean, there are some carbs in beer. That'll put some pep in your step. I watched this TikTok the other day of this runner trail running up a mountain, like a very long, very steep run up this mountain. And the only thing he brought was his phone and then a Coors Light, which he then drank when he got to the top of the mountain. And this was a very, very, very, very fit-appearing person. And I thought, maybe that's my problem, Andrew. I'm not capping off enough of my jogs with a Coors Light.

I've been slipping into some Coors Lights lately, too. You know, I was a Bud Light man at one point, much to the chagrin of the listeners. I became a Miller Light person. Probably like Denny, who's a homebrewing enthusiast. Exactly. So then I made everybody happy by switching to Miller Lite, of course, which has been my companion through many ups and downs the past several years. But then the other day, I don't remember why exactly, but I was going to some friends' houses. Yeah, I got friends. And I couldn't find the Miller Lite. Or you know what it was? I couldn't find small cans of Miller Lite. Even if it's the same price, sometimes you just don't want a tall boy. Sometimes you just want to crush the regular 12-ouncers, right? So I got the Coors Lite. It went down easy, my friend. And it was really good. I just think that Coors is a little bit more associated with, like, I don't know. I just get the impression that Coors is a little Trumpy, like a little, like, donating to the wrong things. Tapping the Rockies. Yeah, exactly. So I don't know if I'm right about that or wrong.

People have told me that. I don't know. I will tell you, it's not a great sign that the guy who founded it was named Adolf. Now, I know that was just being named Kevin. in like if you were from like you know bavaria in the 1905 like that was a normal name back then but yeah yeah you know it's a little rough speaking of kevin's i i was i'm texting our friend camaro kev i don't know if he's ever said this to you or vives in the context of like being sitting at the eagles but for 20 plus years he and i have been saying yeah bud coors miller it don't matter which is which is quoting an like an uncle of his who used to when offered a beer Would you say Bud Coors Miller It don't matter

I don't think I've heard that before But he's got another Uncle Jack by the way We've gotten a quick response It was Uncle Jack The aforementioned friends Who I was hanging out with When I was slurping back Those Coors Lights the other day Was Camaro Kev He was one of them And he had another expression Related to Coors Light as well First of all I think he calls it Coors Not Coors But anyway I'm coming up blank So glad I added that to the conversation.

Well, we're glad for listener Denny donating to the show. What I would really be curious about is if Denny is homebrewing his beer, but he's trying to make it taste as much like Coors Light as possible. That would be great. Yeah, that's heavy fuel. Because you know how there are all these hacks, like how to make the Cheddar Bay biscuits from Red Lobster. And I've actually availed myself of some of these recipes when I'm really just, like, craving a certain kind of mass-produced food thing. I wonder if there's that equivalent of beer. If there are, like, these home brewers are like, make something that tastes exactly like a Bud Light. I'll bet you that.

I bet you there is possibly. By the way, the only one of those imitation things that I make is something I've never even had the original of, which is the P.F. Chang's Chicken Lettuce Wraps. The other day, I mean, not the other day, years ago, I was flipping through looking for a good like kind of summertime meal, you know, and I was like something that could be served maybe cold, something that seemed refreshing but still had some, you know, some caloric advantages to it. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. But, you know, something that was like somewhat hearty is what I think I meant there, but also kind of light and crisp on a summer night. And I came across a recipe for P.F. Chang's chicken lettuce wraps. I've never been to a P.F. Chang's, but I have made these lettuce wraps many times.

That sounds good. Oh, they're good. Now you got me hankering for some kind of—I wonder if there's a vegetarian version of that. You know, Becca and I went to Dintai and sampled—I should have reported this to the listeners because I'm the world's worst vegetarian in that I often eat meat now. I mean, not often, but so Becca is a really phenomenal cook and can just like make anything from scratch without a recipe, like baked Addie's birthday cake, just kind of like, and I was like, did you measure this out? She goes, no, you just put the stuff in. It's fine. Like, so I think she's the person that will be able to maybe make a vegetarian Shao Long Bao. Wow. So we went to the Dintai here in Portland and she doesn't eat meat either, but we were like, we have, this is a sack. We have to make for the for this endeavor, which is we have to actually consume at least one Shaolong Bao so you can taste what it's supposed to taste like so that then we can start making the vegetarian version. So we did that a couple of weeks. And didn't I does not have a vegetarian version. So they don't they have a mushroom filled. It's not a Shaolong Bao. It's not a soup dumpling. It's just like a mushroom. And, you know, mushrooms are my cottage cheese. yeah yep so it's not anything close to it but i will report back on on the progress of making a vegetarian uh soup dumpling at some point uh thank you again to our dazzling donors thanks ryan and denny for making the show possible hello and welcome to top story all right let's talk furniture free furniture etiquette And let's also welcome to the program One Genevieve has Vives, thanks for coming on today Thanks for having me

For the record, I booked her I just want that producer credit if you don't mind

No, that's duly noted We were talking about you When this came up initially on the show Genevieve, because you are You have an amazing eye For roadside Free furniture that you Pick up and then usually do some kind of like alchemy on to where you redo it and it's all nice later on um so why don't we start by Andrew do you want to kind of reset well I think it was listener Ann right what was going on for

listener Ann yeah I'm gonna reset this uh for a second before we do that though I'm gonna ask because I'm actually trying to take a mental inventory myself what are some of your most prized possessions that you found by the side of the road I mentioned your velvet Lionel Richie

painting the velvet Lionel is very precious um it obviously could not be improved upon so it is exactly as i found it which was sitting in outside somebody's house by the curb in a pile of in a box full of garbage but the best thing i really ever found for free um that was purely i again i think i'm pretty sure it was for taking i'm like 96 percent sure it was for taking i can't wait to read this email to genevieve where are these two beautiful now beautiful um chairs and i i kind of This is where I lack the vocabulary, but they were very like a mid-century style armchairs, blonde wood. And I found them sitting by the side of the road in Concord, New Hampshire. They were pretty banged up. They were, you know, structurally solid, but the finish on them was pretty shot. But I could tell just looking at them that they were, and like the sort of weave that the cushions sit on and the bottom of the chair was pretty shot. so I grabbed them off the street and put the threw them in my car and then for years took them from house to house we moved a lot during those years at one point I like I made some cushions and put the cushions on them but you know with the bad finish and the um the sort of crappy mesh in the seat and then my own sort of caveman efforts at making um at making cushions they looked pretty junky and then when we lived in LA I finally just you know spent the money took them to a refinisher and they did such a nice job that when and when they got when they when i went to pick them up they offered to buy them from me for like 700 bucks yeah so such a so flattering those are my very special chairs that i love that were that were free plus the cost of a refinishing but still well worth it and bananas knows that she's not allowed to sit

on them yet whenever we come home she jumps off the orange chair also like it got to the point with Genevieve, and I'm being serious here, where if we were driving together and I saw there was some free stuff on the side of the road up ahead, I would pray a little pray that Genevieve would notice that you'd just like... I always notice it. You'd be like, what's that?

What's that? Hey, is that an interesting bird up there?

Hey, look, it's Big Ben.

I found a lot of things on Craigslist for very close to free. Like, our coffee table was 15 or 20 bucks. Then you finished that yourself. And I refinished that myself.

You also got things on the other side of the spectrum. One of my favorite stories is when we were living in New Hampshire is we needed just a big fat log to chop wood on. Like a, what do you call it? A wood block. It was a chopping block. A chopping block, essentially. Yeah, like essentially like a stump because we had a quart of wood in our garage or a half a quart of wood and we had a wood burning stove but I was like splitting it with an axe just on like hard snow essentially and I was like I needed destroying our axe yeah yes and that part of the lawn yeah um so which I think I fixed later um the Hank Hill in me but anyway then one day you come home in your Saturn Just a terrible car

I also had a I had a hundred degree fever That day I was sick

And this stump That you found Was on the side Of a highway The 93

Yeah

Not a side road

So I had passed This like This road You know I drive I would drive On the 93 freeway Every day to work And I had passed Several times A place where They had been doing Some you know Forest management Essentially Like cutting down trees Chopping them up And they you know hadn't moved the the debris yet so i drove my little saturn pulled it over on the highway which you are really not supposed to do and i was i was a little delirious i had a i had a pretty high fever because i think i had the flu and i just got out of my car ran in ran into the sort of the woods and grabbed the first one because i didn't want to get stopped by a cop and there's troopers all over that highway so i just grabbed the first um section of tree that i could find picked it up threw it in the trunk got back in and left and then i drove it home i remember

you like carrying this heavy thing like well you went to what happened was you went to get it out

of the car when i came home that day i said i found i found a chopping block and you went to go get it out of the trunk and you said how did you lift this and it was because i had hulk strength

from from adrenaline and yeah adrenaline and probably the fever a little bit so there are Genevieve's bona fides. Now, here is a post that listener Ann put on the Slack page about a week ago, and there is a resolution to this. We have an update from Ann, and we read this on the show the other day, but I just wanted Genevieve. I have not told Genevieve exactly what the details are in this note, so I'm going to read this directly because this was an ethical dilemma regarding free furniture. Ann says, there's a house behind us. It's for sale, and they have free stuff on the porch and in a back shed including furniture yesterday we walked by and there's this hutch that is exactly like the one I've been wanting it is so cute but I had a sign on it that someone was coming for it and quote please save with a phone number I texted the number and I guess she's going to try to pick it up today but if it's there tonight I want to take it is that bad I was telling my mom about it last night and she almost picked it up for me without even asking. She said, you can't really reserve free stuff. It's not like this woman paid for it and now she's coming back to pick it up. My husband found out about that and got really upset and said that was very wrong. And so I ended up not having my mom pick it up. But now I'm having this ethical dilemma. How long do you let someone figure out how to pick up a free piece of furniture before grabbing it yourself? Now, Luke, I'm going to let you kind of explain your take on this when we read it the first time. You were kind of worried that someone else might ignore the note. It wasn't even like competition between you, or in this case, Anne, and the person who supposedly claimed it, but that some other unscrupulous person would come along and just ignore the note.

Someone else's mom. Yeah. Right. Like, my thought was, if I just leave this here and let – I leave this here with the note waiting for the person to come back, someone worse than me is going to just take it. Yeah, you're going to get prisoner's dilemma-ed. Exactly. So I need to be the worst person. I need to out-worst the worst person and just take it before they can come in and be worse than me. But then where I feel like I really landed by the end, and I may have even gotten you kind of over here too, Andrew, was the rules to me, the rules of the free stuff are you either take it when you see it or it's fair game. And Vives, I bet you can identify with this. Oh, yes. i've been on a walk hell yeah something and like then you just have to sit in the chair calling people to come get you until like if you walk away from a free anything that's left out to me

it's it remains fair game there's no dibs i have a run home i have like dashed i don't like to run but i have an eagle sword my way to my car and like beat it back to try to get the free thing because yeah like um i do think that the note is sort of not fair game having i don't know if it's my can i feel like yeah so having said that the fact i think it's it's weirdly counterintuitive or almost um ironic maybe i sort of feel like had ann just said uh notes ain't shit and grabbed the hutch which i feel you so hard and like if if i saw a thing like that that was like it's you know the perfect thing that i need and it's right here and it's free boy i would have a hard time leaving that however since she took the extra step of texting the person and confirmed that they are you know planning to get it i think the thing to do is Let's do this.

give them the time that they said they would come and get it in. Like, you know, it almost would have been more ethically defensible to just take it and say, like, I don't observe the note rule. You don't always leave a note. But since she engaged with the note, I think ethically it becomes incumbent upon her to honor the spirit of the note for a reasonable period, not forever. And I think certainly the day is sufficient.

I ended up kind of there, too, because at first I said, you know what? I probably wouldn't mess with it at all. I wouldn't go through the process of texting this person. I certainly wouldn't want to tip my hand.

You're the worst person to ask. You never take free things anyway.

No, it is true. But I do have strong feelings about notes. You do love notes.

And you have a lot of thoughts about notes. What color did it get into what color the ink was? You know what?

I do think there was a photo attached. It looked like it might have been black ink, so that's a big problem right there. Yeah, right there.

That's an act of violence.

But no, you're right. I'm not somebody who's in this culture of free stuff like you are, but I do, you know, when somebody feels entitled to something, like, hey, I left a note, therefore I'm entitled to it. Even the Boston tradition or the Northside Boston tradition of putting a chair in the street to save your parking spot, that always rankled me.

Yeah, there's putting the chair in the street to save the parking, and then there's putting which the northenders do routinely and then there's i dug out this parking slot yeah spot from two feet of snow sure it is my gd parking spot yeah if you've dug it out yeah let me just

say if you dig it out you get to keep it i agree if you didn't dig it out if it's the summer and you just don't want to have to look for parking yeah out of here with that shit yeah unless you're

a 98 year old italian man but i and then you're out there playing chess in the spot please i'm

I'm sure it's more like Pinochle or something I want to say.

But I ended up kind of saying like either. Some sort of bocce ball situation.

Yeah, I wanted to say bocce, but then that seemed like you need more of a field for it.

But I also was like, yeah, either ignore it or don't, but I wouldn't have engaged because I wouldn't want this person to have my phone number.

Yeah, well, there's a whole thing.

Yeah, the more Luke talks about it, I was like, yeah, you know what? Screw this note. Just take the thing if you really want it that bad.

Definitely make that call from a pay phone. First of all, make a time machine. Get in your time machine. Go back 20 years. Find a pay phone. Call from that.

And then assume that this person is going to pick up a call from an unknown number.

Right.

Anyway, Ann said, I did post an update on the Hutch situation. The Hutchuation. The Hutchuation. Long story short, the woman, quote unquote, Nadine. That's in quotes. I don't know if we're not believing that's Nadine's real name. Nadine texted me and let me know that she changed her mind. Hooray.

Good job, Nadine. Officially gave. Good deeds are rewarded.

Gave her blessing for me to take the hutch. I'd found the hutch on Thursday evening around 5-ish, and I had decided that I was going to give her until 6 p.m. that next night. That is quite generous. So she's giving a 25-hour window here, if I'm doing my math right, to pick it up in case she needed some extra time after work or something. And after that, it was mine. If she didn't take it I even offered to pay Nadine for it Because I wanted it that badly And I thought if I gave her $20 for it It was still way cheaper Than what I would have gotten it for Now you're just being a complete cuck

Somehow in a universe Where you're having to pay You're having to pay money For a free piece of furniture

To somebody that it doesn't even belong to But I mean this is nice These are the tens

And then Nadine sounds like a real mensch too Because Nadine was like She could have made a free She didn't want the hutch anymore She could have turned it into $20 just for leaving it there, for doing nothing. Yeah, for doing nothing. But instead, she did the right thing, which was, no, now it's your free furniture.

Yeah, apparently Nadine didn't even respond, didn't dignify the $20 with the response. So I enjoyed hearing your take on the situation. My brain went through the same thoughts.

Can we get a picture of this hutch?

Yes, I do have a picture of the hutch I can show you. I don't know if Anne wants me to publish it or not, because Anne's sort of in the reflection of it. I'll check it again. Oh, yeah, no, don't share that. I worried someone else would take it while I was waiting for Nadine to figure her shit out. I also thought if I saw something free on the side of the road, I would never put a sign on it to be saved and actually expect people to leave it for me.

Well, I'm baffled by Nadine here, because Nadine went to the trouble of leaving a note, putting her phone number on it, which I wouldn't do that just for my own safety and security. i wouldn't be putting my phone number out there period um but like she leaves her she leaves a note she wants it bad enough that she's like please don't take this instead of like if she was on the bubble that's the time when you're like i'm gonna go home get the car come back if it's still there it was meant to be you know You

But instead, she like kind of went this extra mile, but then changed her mind. But maybe it was all, you know, I, as you know, I think all things are meant to be. There's always a reason.

That's right. You believe in that and love at first sight. I believe in love at first sight. You're such a softie.

No, I don't believe that. Obviously, it's a load of horseshit. But I do think that perhaps it worked out in Anne's favor. Well, I mean, if Anne had just seen it and there wasn't a sign, she could have just taken it. But the sign might have deterred somebody else from taking it.

Oh, interesting. That's a good point. You know, this also seems to play into another phenomenon that you've talked to me about. I might have this wrong, but you've also tried to kind of get rid of things before, right? Because you're always in this process of like kind of finding things. Yeah, I'm like on buy nothing.

Craigslist a lot of things. I've got an upcoming offer on a dining set.

So anyway, you have said to me that you have tried to give away pretty decent things on FreeCycle or one of those free community groups. And by the very nature of them being free, those people end up kind of flaking out more because there's like no value.

Can I tell you, that's exactly what happened. We had this little love seat that I came to low that was incredibly uncomfortable. And I just regretted buying it. But it was like it was had it had a little bit of style to it. it was like kind of a blue velvet thing and i was like i don't want this thing i don't think it's worth any money you know we got it one of those sort of you know premium kind of places and so i put it on buy nothing which is like it's really for just your local neighborhood you cannot i and i probably could have i didn't bother putting on free craigslist because i thought like well somebody like in my neighborhood can come get this and several people expressed interest but then flaked out immediately so then i was like well i'll just put it on craigslist for $40 or best offer $60 or best offer or something like that it was like you know very little money for a sofa but also more money than I think it was worth and it was gone the next day a woman came she took it off my hands gave me the money she was throwing it in like the back seat of her SUV and I said hey like I mean I already had the money in my pocket at this point I was like I just tell you like this thing's not the most comfortable and she's like that's okay my dogs will my dogs won't mind it was just a couch for her dogs which is exactly the level of couch it

was yeah that's totally the what like perceived value yes it teaches you craigslist will teach

you about psychology like nothing else i want to do a doctorate on it i that's a great idea i sold a car on craigslist and you you no matter what you price your car at you could price your car at 50 and you will not sell it for more than 40 because everyone wants to talk you down i remember having this conversation with the guy who ultimately bought it where he like wanted to take a hundred dollars off and i was like i said something like are you really gonna like argue with me over a hundred dollars and he goes are you and i was like well touche yes i don't play

poker against that guy i know right that's a real flex it was um there's a really good picture of This hutch, by the way, that does not have the reflection. I will blur out the phone number of the texter, and I'll post it so that everybody can see it. But also, I'm going to show it to you and Luke right now, too, if you guys want your reactions on this.

A couple of thoughts off of this whole thing. One, I have a new plan, which is if I see a piece of furniture on the side of the road that I want, I'm going to leave a note reserving it and asking someone to bring it to my house. Why not just? Shoot for the stars. Yeah, right? you know and also i now have a song to the tune of blinded by the light in my head but the words are baffled by nadine and that will just live with me for the next 24 hours so enjoy that everyone

that's also possibly a show title i did send you a picture baffled by nadine yes i sent you the picture uh luke and genevieve you can look at the hutch there it's kind of nice right so very nice good get i don't know how to describe furniture genevieve it seems like that would be more your uh expertise it's kind of traditional style um it's got those glass window panes with two

shelves and they're yeah it looks like it looks like it's in nice condition yep um yeah excellent

find oh score yeah absolutely missing one it's missing one pole but that's very easily remedied

yeah yeah one little piece of i guess hardware there's nothing more satisfying to me than rehabbing a piece of furniture number by the way yeah oh my gosh i know i'm gonna blur that out for the show pic but should we call nadine no let's leave nadine alone okay so um i hope i haven't built this up too much but somebody heard us uh talking about ann's hutch situation and sent in this note this is zach from queens who has emailed in before and we've read zach's notes on the air i felt this was relevant i find this email astounding he says regarding the freebie Huck.

conversation i have an anecdote that is germane to andrew having recently bought a house when my wife and i were looking to buy a home in queens we never dreamed that we could afford a house we were looking at condos and co-ops but one night while at a concert on my wife's 33rd birthday there was a lull and i went on zillow hey relatable luke genevieve highly relatable there's a lull in the concert i'm in the bathroom there was a brief pause in the conversation

and I went on Zillow.

I go in the bathroom. I lock the door. People hear like snorting and they're like, is he doing coke? No, he's snorting at the cost of these houses he's looking at on Redfin. My lie is that I'm doing cocaine to cover for the fact that I'm on Zillow.

Redfin is my cocaine. Oh my gosh.

Seriously.

And you sleep better.

I'll be honest. There's a lull in the concert. I went on Zillow and I saw this amazing three floor row house that was just barely still in our price range for sale by the owner my wife was rightly irked with me for looking at zillow at a concert on her birthday until she saw the photos high ceilings original hardwood floors from the 1920s wood-burning fireplace and right in our target neighborhood the next day we toured it and we put in an aggressive in an aggressive offer not insignificantly above ask was it a bully offer possibly two days later we have an accepted offer pending inspection and we hustled to get our inspector took a day off of work etc thank god we must be nice by the way that you don't

have to waive the inspection yeah what paradise do you live in the same thought new york city

quaint little town where they still inspect homes exactly you're allowed to inspect yourself

So, okay, so thank God we hurried because the owner had gone back to his house upstate and had, because it was for sale by the owner, he had no selling agent to let us in. Just one of those little key boxes. When our agent went to open the front door, wedged into the storm door was a handwritten cash offer that was higher than ours.

Rip!

our agent who will remain nameless quickly crumpled it up and put it in his pocket and said man lots of litter on this block

if your agent hadn't done that you should fire you should have fired them immediately

you guys are going to need to buy a broom to keep your sidewalk clean said the agent and then winked thank god the guy who sold us the house was too Tony Soprano you're real it was a freaking gabagoo

That is, I mean, I love it, but I mean, that is a serious, like, mafia move.

Yep, and we've been in the house for five years now.

You can't be putting cash offers indoors and expecting that to be a legitimate way of doing business.

And Zach has no regrets. He's been in the house for five years. We're raising a daughter with another on the way. Congratulations, Zach. And we could not imagine living anywhere else. Take the hutch, leave the cannoli. Maybe that's the show title, actually.

Oh, you've gobbled your last ghoul.

I don't know if you know, Genevieve, but we had a really intense gobbledgool phase on this show for about, I don't know, a month?

I heard Inklings.

We've even got this song.

Woke up this morning, got some gobbledgool.

I'm so glad we got that email from Zach because it allowed us to dip back into the Gabagool files. Oh, man. See, that's what you want from your real estate agent. Yes. It's just a complete lack of scruples. And again, I mean, I'm with you. Like the law of the jungle is you leave a note with – I mean, if that agent was serious about it, they would have just been sitting on the porch waiting for the person to come back from their country home so that they could just, you know, literally kind of buttonhole them or whatever you say, like right when they got there.

There are no prisoners in New York real estate or Seattle real estate. No. No. It's just – yeah. It's like you've got to do what you've got to do. A hutch is one thing. There's a you know, you can have a certain amount of gentility associated with the free hutch of a three story townhouse that's in your price range in New York.

You're raising your family. Forget it. No, that's like, you know, did I forget? Are you are you all up to speed on the how? too with john wilson show on hbo no you've told me about a couple of times i would recommend it's

really it's really really good um and he does he ends up buying his apartment this will maybe sell it for you vives he he's offered a chance to buy the apartment in new york that he lives in from his kind of like elderly like babushka landlord who lives like in the lower unit and so he goes on this whole journey of of buying a piece of property but uh it's it's quite fascinating and again has to do with real estate so i would recommend checking that one out now that we're

not in the throes of looking at real estate that sounds enjoyable enjoyable and interesting when you're in the when i don't know if this was has ever been your experience but because we were doing you know house hunting and and house offering in such a competitive dog eat dog you know the kind of market where just you feel like it's that you just feel like the and i i i hear how this sounds but it makes you feel like the poorest person in seattle because you pull up to a house that like really doesn't even meet your needs it's like too small or it's you know one wall has been you know blown up by a mortar or something right and and you know you pull up in your volkswagen and then there's like four teslas parked outside of it you're just like great why am i why am i even here trying to bid on this you know disaster of a house that i also

cannot afford remember that that that obvious tear down that was in Wedgwood that we looked at but we were you know again we I I felt I kept every time I'd walk in another man's tear down is our um home sweet home exactly like I forever home I felt like I was like a kid with like lunch money and like a wrinkled little like baggie right like um I don't know can I play this game too um and this was so obviously a tear down and you and I are like touring it with Sarah kind of looking around being like well i guess we could fix this like meanwhile people are outside with tape measures literally like how many units can we get on this land exactly really what it is

somebody is standing with an iphone facetiming with the person who's actually buying the house who's never been there yeah yeah it's been yeah someone's holding someone is holding an iphone pointing it at the direction of the house of the person who made the all cash offer 200 over exactly

Before we wrap this up I wanted to say we're going into our Blur's Day segment Here so I just wanted to say a quick official Happy Blur's Day to Genevieve It was Genevieve's Blur's Day yesterday Oh happy birthday

Thank you Do you know that I share a birthday with Lindy West

What? That means I also owe her a birthday Genevieve I'm adding you To my recurring Calendar That it's your birthday yesterday and that means next year you can look forward to getting a text from me at seven in the morning on this date saying happy birthday i'm already looking forward to it excited for that i uh and if to anyone who i haven't wished a happy birthday to it's because it's you're not in this calendar i swear to god like i have like nieces and nephews and extended family they're like god how is luke so on it with my birthday because it's in this calendar and if it's not

there i don't even know that you exist a little warning for genevieve though luke really loves that Beatles song you say it's your birthday so it'll probably be either like a transcript of that or maybe a MIDI file or something because he thinks it's a really clever way of indicating a birthday on the radio

how do you think of that

how did you think of that Luke I spent years

as a talk radio producer Andrew and for about the first five I was just I couldn't think of anything and then in about year six I matured I got that going I got Taxman I got Beatles it's really all just Beatles songs yeah

They've got one for everything

Well happy birthday Genevieve And I guess we can consider Your home ownership to be a birthday present to yourself

It's the best one I could ever get

Yeah alright awesome well thanks for helping us out today

I always be sneaky, like how I snuck Genevieve's Blur's Day into a non-Blur's Day segment. Thank you for allowing that.

That is your prerogative, my friend, is the person who compiles and then edits for clarity these Blur's Day messages week in, week out. I think you absolutely get to make some executive decisions around Blurs.

I should set up a LinkedIn profile and put down that I'm like senior Blurs Day producer for Too Beautiful to Live and just see if that gets any traction in the industry.

You could get a job in podcasting doing it.

that like it sounds like a thing and you know oh i was a senior i was a vp in charge of blurs

development somebody will hire you at cadence 13 i promise blurs i was vp of blurs day partnerships um okay let's get to some real blurs vertical integration Oh, shit. What are we going to be in this show? A lot of show titles today. Baffled by Nadine or Blurtical Integration. Blurtical Integration. I'm writing that down. We also have Take the Hutch, Leave the Cannoli. Cannoli, never. Take it easy, Hutch. Hutch Rimerson. Wait, what's that movie you guys reference a lot? Sleep Easy, Hutch Rimes with Steve Weber. I don't know Nicole Kidman's name Can never conjure that But Steven Weber and Swoozie Kurtz Swoozie Kurtz Sleep Easy Hutch Rhymes Is burned into my brain We might actually have that on DVD I think I got it for Genevieve for her birthday One year It just came on TV one time when we were in a hotel room Years and years ago

Anyway, Steven Weber was so Terrible I don't mean terrible like bad at acting but, like, portrayed such an unlikable character in the reboot or the whatever you want to call it of Get Shorty. Oh, in the TV show. I never watched the TV show.

You said it was so good.

It was on, like, FXXXX or something. No, it was on Epix or something. It was on one of those way up on the high cable channels. But, you know, it had Chris O'Dowd and Ray Romano in it, among others. But one of the main sort of, like, bad characters is Steven Weber. And he portrayed it expertly enough that I now have a bad impression of Stephen Webber as a human.

I think Stephen Webber, I'm going to probably get a small detail of this wrong too, but there was a made-for-TV version of Stephen King's The Shining that apparently Stephen King preferred over the theatrical release because he has no taste and he didn't like the way.

There weren't enough hedge monsters coming into life Right, right, right Which I believe is one of the big things he was mad that they left out of the Kubrick version

Kubrick, thank you, I was having trouble coming up with Kubrick's name Yeah, and I think one of the things that Stephen King didn't like about Kubrick's version Was that the imaginary kind of, I don't know if it was imaginary friend or ghost or whatever But Danny Torrance's little imaginary, you know He just represents him by doing a voice in the movie. Tony's a little man who lives in my throat. Exactly. But I think Stephen Webber plays a floating hologram of Tony in the made-for-TV version. Stephen King's like, yeah, see, that's it. You've got to show Tony.

Yes, that was the whole problem. God, I mean, happy Blur's Day, everyone. But let me just say, I think The Shining might be pretty close to a perfect film. um and i mean so maybe it's it's impossible for me to imagine a different version of it but i mean the idea that tony is just a weird voice that that kid does yeah it's so much more troubling it's so creepy then then there being some sort of apparition that represents tony it's like again stephen king is an immensely talented writer i i will always say this when the subject of stephen king comes up i think stephen king's book on writing is one of the best books i've ever read about the craft of writing um so i am i'm very pro steven king but the idea that this person who's so genius at writing also would think that it's better for tony to be a ghost it's just strange to me because like the guy understands storytelling he must have seen the shining how could he have watched the shining and not thought well that's a perfect movie i yeah i also think well i mean

i've read a lot of his late not a lot but i've read some of his later stuff too and the thing is I don't even think he's a good writer for whatever that's worth. I think he's a great kind of storyteller, which there is a difference there, and he comes up with fascinating concepts and creates great narrative arcs. There's no doubt about that. You get invested in the narrative arc, but some of the writing is so bad, especially as he gets older, and then he tries to write about any kind of technology, or if there's any black youth in his books. God help us all. It is so cringy. Again, this is his later stuff, though, like as, you know, he's kind of getting up there. So anyway, you know what? Let's do a blurs. This first one comes from Danny to Tony. It says Mrs. Torrance. No, sorry. I want to wish a blurs day to Mrs. Torrance.

What was that? It's from Dick Halloran to Danny Torrance. Would you like some ice cream, Doc? This is from Dan in Miami.

Not Danny, but Dan in Miami says, hi, Andrew and Luke and all of the 10s. I'd like to belatedly blurs myself. Ooh, explicit. And take the opportunity to voice my support for this, the blurs segment. It makes my blurs days. Thanks. Nice. Thanks, Dan. Happy belated blurs day.

Sally says, happy one day late, 59th blurs day to my 11, Charlie. A man who goes out into the world With the intention of being kind Gentle and courteous He's thoughtful and always looks out For the best interests of others He is the best handyman and the world's Sexiest bartender I love you and happy birthday

Love, Sally I now Feel very self-conscious and I hope that Charlie Does not hear the segment Where I recommended ignoring the note And just taking the hutch because Charlie sounds Like he wouldn't If he's kind, gentle, and courteous, that does not sound like somebody who would ignore the note.

Also, I need to confiscate your world's sexiest bartender apron that I know you tend to wear at your house when you're fixing drinks for people.

I think you're thinking of my cocktail shaker that says world's sexiest bartender.

Anything that makes that claim legally, we have to turn that over to Charlie.

God damn it. Just got to go back to Kiss the Cook. Ann says, happy Blursday to Scott. Thank you for bringing TBTL back into my life. Thanks also for laughing at my jokes and having a never-ending amount of energy for our projects, our kids, our adventures. And shout-out to my mom and fellow longtime 10 Karen for reminding me to send this Blur's Day. Yours is coming soon. Sorry, I said that in an ominous way. Yours is coming soon is what I meant to say. You meant to say, yours is coming soon, Mrs. Torrance. I'm so sorry, Karen. I'm so sorry, Ann.

But happy Blur's Day to Scott. Liz says, I want to give a special Blur's Day shout out to our gal Katie. Katie. I know Katie. My friend Katie. Hi, Katie. Isn't she the cat's pajamas? She sure is. I can speak from personal experience on that. Liz says, our friendship goes back to the third grade when Katie befriended me. Katie's one of those people that you can always count on to tell you what's what. Even with all the crap that life has thrown at her She's maintained her wickedly funny sense of humor And that's one of those people that I always have a damn good time with So happy Blur's Day to our friend Katie Now wait a second Indeed I need to figure out what Does Katie have the same Blur's Day as Genevieve possibly?

I think it's this coming Sunday If that's not giving away too much interest Put it in the calendar Put it in the calendar

Put it on the board Katie Beck I'm not kidding.

This is the only way that I know anything at all that's going on. Don't put mine in there. Don't put mine. Sarah in Woodinville says, I'll just kill Luke's mic here. Sarah in Woodinville says, I'd like to wish my boy Cooper a happy golden birthday. He'll be 14 on the 14th. Man, that's sweet. That's a good 14 is a good year to have a golden birthday, but it does make me sad that, you know, you're kind of burning it up so early in life. My golden birthday was the 27th, as you well know, because I was in your calendar. Sure, of course. Yeah. I was the 8th, so I got that one out of the way pretty early. Oh, wow.

I think I got it out of the way before anyone had popularized the concept of the golden birthday.

Yeah. Oh, well. Anyway, that's okay, Cooper. Enjoy your golden birthday. He'll be 14 on the 14th, and he always finds ways to make me laugh and keep me on my toes. Literally, because he's taller than me now. Ha! Thanks for being an awesome person, Coop, and have a great birthday. By the way, I love the name Cooper and the nickname Coop. That is, you just know that's a cool kid, right? Like, you can't not be cool with the name Cooper slash Coop. Right. And you can't not be the Super Bowl MVP.

That's true. Cooper Cup. I'm hoping that the ascension of Cooper Cup and his popularity and the fact that when he makes a catch, the whole crowd goes, I'm hoping that will spread the word that those of us that have names that have that kind of ooh sound in them, That that is how people celebrate our existence Not denigrate our existence

Although that hasn't happened to you in a while Well I guess you haven't been doing a lot of live Oh it happens, it'll happen tonight

On stage at the Alberta Rose Theater But it'll be like four people Like kind of going Which again is like totally fine But I just This will be my life long And you know if there is a If there's a burden to carry through life This is a pretty good burden to have But it is my burden to try to explain to people they're not booing, except some of the people who might be booing. I was saying boo-erns. Is that your mole man? It is.

I used to have a t-shirt. Genevieve got me a t-shirt.

It was just a brown T-shirt, and it didn't have – because it wasn't official. I'm just laughing now because I remember the Portlandia skit that we play all the time. It was not official Simpsons merchandise, right? It was just like a simple word cloud or like a word bubble, I should say, that just says, I was saying Boo Earns. That's not a bad mole man. Which is one of my favorite jokes. Yeah. Anyway, are they – yeah, they might be – or they could be saying poop. Let's hope they're saying Luke. Yeah, God, I didn't realize how many possible insults could have been flying at me. I'm going to get you to appreciate them saying Luke. Yeah, right?

All right, I guess that's going to do it for now. I've got to go do some preparation for tonight's radio recording. Mostly, like I said, preparing for the way I'm going to be promoting TBTL.

Yes, exactly. Yeah, you're going to do a whole monologue and diatribe, right? That's when the downloads will really start. The Greek prefixes.

Downloading in. Yes. Wait, oh no. Are you kidding me? Oh, okay, good. I thought my little sound effects box died here. All right, thanks for listening, everyone. We're going to be back here tomorrow with more Imaginary Radio for you. Until then, have a great Thursday. Take care of yourselves, and please remember, no mountain too tall.

And good luck to all. are you saying boo or boorns i was saying boorns power out