Muse

Welcome to our newest debater, Tina.

Thanks, Mr. DeSanto.

You know most of these jokers. Larry's our policy ace, Zach's a research machine, and Todd's a ninja with sarcasm.

Sarcasm, huh? Any good? No, I'm terrible. Oh, that's too bad.

Ugh, I was doing it! TBTL! What will your first sequence of the day be? Do we have any, uh, new sequences? I have a beta sequence I've been working on. Would you like to see it? They had been posting their stuff out on the Internet, and apparently they'd been met with virtually nothing but ridicule. Hey, Paul. I'm Tane, your latest dancer. I can't wait to entertain you. Now, Tane, I can get into. I'm sorry, who are you?

I was asking myself that same question, and I did not like the answer. Anybody know what this is? Huh? All of this is the digestive system. And now we're going to have a couple of guys who's going to give us a presentation about what happens when the digestive system isn't working properly.

All right. Hello. Good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Thursday edition of TBTL, a show that just might be too beautiful to live. Sounds expensive. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host. You know, you got to eat that microphone. Back home at the Hollywood Broadcast Center right here in Portland, Oregon. It was so nice to be in Hawaii. I feel very lucky that that's a thing I was able to do. And yesterday on the show, I said I didn't want to come home because the weather's nice there. And, you know, it's a tropical paradise. But I gotta say, I do love the Pacific Northwest this time of year because when you get a nice spring day like we may be getting today, there is this enormous, I don't know, I'm no arborist, so I don't know what kind of tree I'm looking at. but there is a gigantic mature tree down the block from where I live that from last week when I was here to now being back here it has totally gone into bloom of some kind of like saffron colored yellow something or other I will be out later today with this I have this app on my phone which is the weirdest name of all time it's iSeek which isn't just a dating site for very religious people but it's also a thing that you can just Point at any kind of plant life that you're wondering what the origin is. I'm trying to find it on my phone. So I guess it's just called Seek, but it's by iNaturalist. And I think maybe National Geographic's got some angle on this whole deal. But it is the coolest app on your phone. If you get it, it'll be the coolest app on your phone. Not as the coolest app you don't have on your phone. You can walk up to any leaf or plant or thing and point it at that. Point your camera at that leaf or plant or thing, and it will, most of the time, be able to tell you what you're looking at. So I'm going to be out on the streets of Portland looking at that tree later. I'll give you a full update tomorrow. So that, my friends, is something to tune in for tomorrow. Find out what tree I'm looking at on today's show. Yeah, that's how you podcast. Let the fun begin. That's how you make it to 3,652 episodes in a collector's series, which is where we are at this morning. And for the last three of those episodes, we've been trying to talk about pickleball, fastest growing sport in America. You play to win the game. The national, I should say the state sport of Washington State, maybe soon to be the national sport of the United States. While I was in Hawaii, out and about, I observed many a tennis court that had been taken over by pickleballers, which is kind of an interesting development we will talk about.

Then speaking of sports and the business of sports, you know, Russell Wilson, longtime Denver Bronco, Russell Wilson, a.k.a. Mr. Unlimited. He has partnered with a guy named A.J. Vaynerchuk to create a sports drink that's being described as an NFT-powered, nootropic-boosted hydration drink brand aimed at Gen Z consumers. I'll have you know that Barry Diller and I are working on a whole new approach to media, combining all the digital. God, just let me drink. This is also going to apparently, this is according to the press release. They're looking to develop next gen products under those banners that can play across various hydration occasions and functional need states. So we'll find out. Russell Wilson and his Bev Bev

friends have been getting up to oh and it's a thursday aka blurs day so we'll do the blurs days so do all that with help this young man longest running cobro of the show maybe best known for the depictions of the tall ships joining us as always he's a long time resident in the way that russell wilson is a long time denver bronco he is a long time resident of the sweet cream district of seattle washington as jay would say uh he's got flow he's andrew walsh he's joining

me right now good morning my friend good morning luke before we get into our own hydration situations um are you disrespecting my hydration situation uh i have an idea here or i don't know if it's an idea so much as an urge to play something for you the brother here is causing

an overlapsation situation now i understand hold on calm down wow yeah is that a whole movie um

i got an email today from a close friend of ours i'm not going to name him here because he sent this to my personal email account and maybe he does one on the record but um the subject line was guardians theme song of course cleveland's baseball team recently changed its name to um the cleveland guardians and the note from our friend says i can't be sure if this is funny or interesting but i do know this it's the official cleveland guardians theme song and i don't think this is a joke i think it's really which is interesting like what is the mariners official theme song what what is the sea do you know any other team's official theme song no i don't i

don't know how that works exactly in terms of who gets to decide like i don't think there is a i mean sometimes what will happen is when a team has a playoff run and some you know this used happen a lot in the 90s i remember in the 80s like if your team was doing really well and getting kind of like far in the playoffs or the whatever you might have someone who is a fan maybe an already established musician in a town like write the song then everyone's playing it on the radio because it's back when people were listening to a lot more radio and it was a whole thing i don't i don't think the super bowl shuffle by the chicago bears followed exactly that arc but that would have been an official team song and they were singing it themselves which was a bonus now

i think you're talking about maybe this kind of thing i don't remember this too well but i have it in my arsenal here this is uh the minnesota twins song from uh many a year ago this team is

hot they're coming on strong got kelly at the wheel and they can't go wrong looking straight ahead on the right track the road's getting shorter and there ain't no turning back because

it's dry time 91 cheer for minnesota because the race is on dry time has begun the twins are off

in 1991 there it is 1991 maybe that was just a promotional song maybe not quite what you're

talking about well i don't this is i'm sure going to fail miserably because it always does when i try to just play youtube on the fly but i remember that when the seahawks were making a push at some point somebody put together a seahawks song that sampled like a go seahawks song this is just from a fan that sampled the song black and yellow by wiz khalifa and my problem with that was black and yellow i believe is a song that's referencing the pittsburgh steelers that's the whole the origin

of that song the original song was yeah because he's that's wiz right from yeah pittsburgh yeah

he's from pittsburgh uh so the idea that the somebody in seattle was like we should make a hype song for our football team but you know we should use is the song that's already for someone else's team more or less this always struck me as tonally so weird so now i'm trying to just based on a quick google let's see if this oh and by the way russell wilson so that's great it's gonna be a theme today like how sad is that how how beta cuck is it to make your hype song just changing

the lyrics of some other team's hype song you know um back in the the good old days when we could root for the cleveland browns they um this is a song i had this on 45 i'm sure i played this for you now this is very specific this is a holiday related you know what i'm going to play for you you have any idea uh i don't remember okay good i'm glad you don't remember this i had this on 45 i listened to this like crazy as a kid

are you trying to get us pulled from spotify andrew On the third day of Christmas, Art Modell gave to me John Cockroach kicking on a ridiculous Super Bowl team On the third day of Christmas, Art Modell gave to me

I feel

delirious. Can this be our new Winter Games intro music entry?

I won't keep it going.

How did Don Krakoff, the kicker, make the list? Is he at that point one of the more promising browns? And he's mentioned so early

in the song, like the kicker it's prominent placing there so okay no webster slaughter oh i'm sure well this is no no this is 1980 so i think this is pre-slaughter this is like cardiac kids era um but um anyway so i'll

wow okay so now can we please hear the official cleveland guardians yeah i don't think and i

honestly have not clicked on this yet i was kind of saving and i got this email right before we started recording um uh you know i don't think this will there's no way this will be funny like that this will probably be earnest this is posted by the cleveland guardians on their official youtube page it says performed exclusively by local artists quote we are cleveland was written in collaboration with the guardians and produced by sam getz and jimmy weaver two founding members of the cleveland-based band welshly arms okay that's it oh wait stop hold on hold on wait one

second people always ask how do you just talk to your friend for over an hour five days a week and it's like because you have to really really build these things up you've got to really establish a sort of a foundation of inane talk and then place atop it the payoff which is the new cleveland guardian song do we think this is based on the the name of the band is welsh

something welshly arms is the name of the band you look them up i'm going to give you more dazzling details about the song then if you want to really dig into this so not only is it those two from that band they are joined on drums by joey coach hannah who has toured and recorded with artists

such as bootsy collins and galen degras oh wow okay so that's a wide range what i was trying to what i was trying to get to was because i haven't heard the song yet i wanted us to try to guess if we think this is going to be hip-hop is this going to be like a um like a john fogarty center field style kind of like put me in coach is it going to be an indie thing because you know there's a big crossover of like you know uh ben gibbard huge mariners fan season ticket holder and same with you know the dudes from pearl jam and stuff like they'll show up and like there's a kind of a you know there's a sort of guitar based sort of indie music thing with baseball sometimes again i could definitely see there being sort of a hip-hop thing i think it's gonna be rock it's gonna be

like kind of down the down the middle rock rock i'm gonna hope that probably i'm gonna hope that probably maybe not like a 19 if they were to make this in 1980 it would be heavy on like a noodley guitar solo like kind of crotch rock kind of thing i don't think it's gonna be that it's gonna be down the middle modern rock whatever that means does that make sense yes who would you i know

this is not your wheelhouse but who would you consider to be down the middle modern rock this is definitely not like a duncan chic like a barely breathing type of situation i don't know who any

of those people are i'm sorry that was intentionally obscure okay i did not know that um also duncan

chic would have been down the middle modern rock 22 years ago because we keep it we keep it current on the pod here do you want to make a guess um well you have more info than i do i think you're Right. I think it'll be, you know what I bet it'll be like, you know what they really love in the NFL now is a lot of this real, like imagine dragons, fallout boy bullshit where it's just like, I'm going to like, I'm this, what, as soon as I started seeing that, I realized it sounded much more Nickelback than I wanted it to. And I'm not saying that to slam Nickelback. Those days are behind me. When I was a child, I spake as a child and based my personality around making fun of Nickelback. Not, that's not what I'm trying to do here. But like there's a real like it's sort of like pop rock, but with a real like I'm a badass vibe. And it's like there's this Fall Out Boy song that the NFL decided to use every time they went to break. It was like something about I'm going to be like the best of the century. And it's just like the dumbest, worst. Sorry to Fall Out Boy heads out there. The one good thing about Fall Out Boy is it is a Simpsons joke. So I'll give them that. But I'm thinking this is going to be something that's really like we're the best, not DJ Khaled voice, but like kind of that modern, upbeat rock that is in the style of something Fall Out Boy or Imagine Dragons would do.

Okay, and I'm going to guess that it's not going to be as aggressive as a football theme might be. I think this is going to be a little bit more like kind of – it's going to be modern rock.

with an uplifting tinge to it is celebrating the city almost more than the team and how far the city has come. That's what I think our predictions are in. Listen for the drumming by somebody who once toured with Bootsy Collins. Take a listen to this. This is We Are Cleveland, official Cleveland Guardians song. Huh.

i guess we know what win butler from the arcade fire is up to now that he left that band

this is a longer intro than i expected i'll tell you that much yeah

Are you ready now? Get up and count it down. It's our time, it's our town, we should make it now.

Oh, yeah, there you go.

That's the, that real kind of arena rock soaring. Yep. Enthemic thing is, is what I was poorly trying to describe.

I think you nailed it. I will give you that. I was expecting it to be slightly less intense than that. I didn't expect it to be so staccato and kind of talking. I did expect, I meant to say this. I did expect kind of a prominent chorus of voices, maybe just because it's called We Are Cleveland. Maybe that is obvious that you're going to hear a whole bunch of people. So the chorus thing, I didn't say that But I did have that in my head Aside from that, I don't think any of my descriptors Really matched, I think yours did It is very much that Imagine Dragons-y Kind of thing So there you go, Luke, you know your sports anthems Is this going to make the team better Is the question I wonder what

This sounds like a dumb question But I sort of wonder what the purpose of that kind of stuff is Like, in other words Is it that, was that commissioned by the team and is it something that they'll just use in marketing and branding and it'll be under some of their, you know, TV ads or is it a thing they're hoping they'll get Clevelanders to start singing, you know, like at the game? Like, I wonder what the application of that is because it feels to me in a way to be really old school. Like, we have an official song for the team. Like, we live in a very, really fractured media landscape, Andrew. And I just don't think it's not it. It isn't like it was in the 70s and 80s where you just had like, first of all, baseball as a sport is having some issues with attracting an audience like I just I would be pleasantly surprised if everyone in Cleveland were humming that new Guardian song.

Yes. Six months from now, I think I mean, it definitely was commissioned by the team. This is the official team release. Right. So my guess is you're right. It'll be used in all kinds of if not like literal literal television commercials. It will be in all kinds of marketing stuff. It'll be in any kind of I don't know presentation that somebody makes. I don't know. Like I'm sure it'll be used a lot by the people who paid for it. Right. Right. Yeah. I mean I don't again I don't I said a little while ago that

i should try to stop yucking yums i've already probably probably severely yucked the yum of some fallout boy and imagine dragons fans out there so i'll just say that song actually you know was um uh was it was perfectly listenable i mean it was it was as if it was as if of extremely high functioning ai program wrote a song for a sports team they got they got most of the notes right you know what i mean like it's it's vaguely inspirational was not it was not offensive to my ear they didn't rip off wiz khalifa so i'm giving them back yeah i mean i didn't they're not using another team's baseball song it's basically their song they didn't ask me

for notes on i mean the one note i would say is not enough don cockroft references um but aside from that i think that they pretty much nailed it so thank you to our anonymous friend for sending

that in it was both interesting and sort of funny we had um i was telling this story on a week ago when i was in la andrew um when i was out on a jog and i i jogged past i was the subject was trying to fully appreciate the kind of sweet moments of our life because it's easy when you've just heard the new cleveland guardians theme song to focus on the negative side of life We'll be right back. And I don't want us to be that show. So we're talking about how being out in L.A. on a little jog. And then I was jogging past this older gentleman who was using a walker. And he he looked like he was actually having a really nice morning in L.A. So that was cool. And I wanted to give him a little wave of acknowledgement. But I also didn't want to create a situation where he was caught between the socially, you know, the social pressure of waving back and maybe not being able to have both hands on this walker that he was using. But I also didn't want to not wave to him because I wanted to just kind of do the thing of, like, lovely morning, sir. So I did. This guy, it turns out, was very fine waving, gave me a nice wave, was A-okay. But you had mentioned that we got a voicemail from listener Ryan out in D.C. Yeah. On this very topic, basically, of kind of, like, not wanting to seem in the moment like you're not being, you know, I don't know, a friend to people out in the world.

Yeah, this is from our buddy Ryan, who I think after tomorrow we're going to probably start having to refer to his associate producer, Ryan, because he is the person who submitted a possible little intro jingle for Tweet of the Week. Oh, Tweet of the Week. Yes, exactly. Oh, my gosh. All of America is waiting for this. Ryan is in the zeitgeist in the spotlight this week, because I'm excited to play that for you. Have you been thinking about what tweets you're going to be – are you thinking about it yet?

I want there. I really think there should be two categories. And the problem is the second category will be harder for me to track. It's deleted tweets. That's also I mean, you want to know what the most interesting expression of this is. What's Luke's deleted tweet of the week and why? That's really interesting. But I don't know because I deleted them. That's the problem. Right, right. I'm trying to think of what we would call that delete of the week. Ryan, if you want to be on on Monday If you want to do a clean three-show sweep You've got to write us a delete of the week jingle by Monday All right

But anyway, yeah So that's Ryan, D.C. area Ryan uses a wheelchair He mentions that in this, I think about halfway through But for context at the beginning That's what's going on here And he even mentions that you might even know The train station that it refers to in here, Luke But here, take it away, Ryan

Hey, friendos, it's Ryan in D.C. slash Virginia And Luke was talking about the old man and the walker that he was living to and how he didn't want him to take his hand off and create any kind of chaotic situation for him. And it made me laugh because I was thinking about years ago, probably about 10 years or so now, I was interning on the Hill working for congressman and now governor, Ensley, name drop. And the, Luke, you know this because you live in D.C., Capital South, which is the Metro Stop, actually lets you off, if you take the elevator, which I needed to do as a wheelchair user, the elevator lets you off at the bottom of the hill, which makes no sense because the escalator lets you off to the top of the hill. I feel like there was some sort of design issue with that. But anyway, the point is that I have memories for an entire summer of wheeling up that hill from where the elevator would let you off and going up the hill in a suit. And I'm wheeling and I'm wheeling and lots of manual labor going into that. And there's always people that are busking and handing out the daily newspaper and what have you. And I can't stop because obviously I'm pushing uphill. If I stop to talk or converse or take something from somebody, I've got one hand on, you know, my wheel and I'm pushing up a hill. It's a bad situation. So I can't stop my momentum. And if I do that, that's like bad news bears. And so there were many times where I was going up that hill and I would get stared at so awkwardly by people that were, like, thinking I was ignoring them or being rude or what have you. and i'm trying to like explain to them as much as i can like i stop i'm rolling backwards like i'm

not an asshole anyway um power out yeah notes to the buskers and the people who are handing out

their rap cds ryan is not an asshole you know um that's that is of particular interest to me because i as you mentioned i lived in dc and i worked on capitol hill and i worked on capitol throughout the summer and i remember just the misery of there's a reason why that why congress takes off a significant part of the summer and why everyone who can sort of gets out of out of washington dc if they can because it is brutally muggy and brutally hot and having to wear a suit is just adds to it and i just remember feeling kind of woe is me about the whole thing and never even once because andrew i only center my experience and things never even once thinking about somebody like ryan who's got all of those same things that i'm dealing with and then this whole

other friggin high impact workout he has to do he has to do hit training to get to his internship in his suit while also the social pressure of you know of sort of not waving at everyone like that makes me that makes me and i know this wasn't the point of ryan's voicemail but that makes me uh feel embarrassed that i ever even had one thought of self-pity about me you know and my little experience of summertime in dc because that is it is steamy there and you know the urban

design aspect of that is what really stood out to me too i'm sure that this was probably developed long before people were thinking about accessibility um but that is so aggravating and and you know what it raises and i'm just thinking of this now in fact ryan if you if you if you're feeling up to it send me a note let me let me know what you think of this because there was something in the paper i can't remember if it was a national story or a story here in washington state where for one day a bunch of policymakers of some sort um used wheelchairs that you know they weren't people who needed wheelchairs in their daily lives but they used wheelchairs to get that experience for a day and it seemed my initial reaction was that was a little that's a little cringy like it seemed a little cosplay-ish for me but maybe maybe i'm straight up wrong about that because i mean maybe that's the only way people who are making the decisions well now hopefully more people are at the table when you're when you're making these kind of like urban design um when you're making these plans but i don't know just seeing these photos of a bunch of people in wheelchairs who don't need wheelchairs on a daily basis seemed a little cringy to me but maybe it's a good idea because you really do not understand it until you're kind of in that situation you have to navigate around yourself i don't know i think the cringy part

would be the photo documentation of it like if you just had somebody who doesn't um use a wheelchair typically but and particularly if they're in a position to make decisions around like you said urban design and things like that like if you just had somebody who had a job where they could have some positive impact on access for folks and then they just were going to use a wheelchair for a few days to just get that particular view of life i think that i can't see a downside to that the slightly performative aspect of it if there was a media availability if it was kind of like hey get a load of these walking saints or i should say in this case rolling saints who are like you know going to do this thing that part feels a little bit self-serving to me because i i don't know what the point what the point of publicizing it would be like if the the idea is that it would be good for people in positions of power to have the experience of as many different you know ways that folks are in the world so that they can try to be inclusive you know well i mean i guess the

the the only reason to publicize it would be to raise awareness i guess you know like if there was some initiative where let's i don't know if these were state lawmakers or whatever and so i'm not really doing a really great a great job of telling this story because i don't know any the goddamn details but um let's just say that it's like a bunch of uh a bunch of lawmakers in olympia washington decide that they're going to make this an initiative and they're going to have one day where they they want to encourage people to try themselves and their colleagues to use wheelchairs to to maybe get an understanding of what it's like to navigate like i guess that would be a new story if you're the seattle times or the oh sure i understand i under i mean look it's a

quiet Tuesday yeah you're you know like covering the the state legislature you're sitting there in this just absolutely ramshackle house that the Seattle Times used to work out of I know because we used the other room in this ramshackle house for KVI broadcasting wait it was just a one bureau

of the Seattle Times you mean was in this tiny house did you say this was the state legislature oh right I'm sorry okay yeah yeah I see what you're saying yeah so down in Olympia right

right okay the bureau yeah you had you know you had the sort of i'm sure that i don't i don't even know if like does the seattle times have a dedicated they you know like they had i think i mean this is this is just old man weeps at cloud but like they had at least three full-time reporters who just lived down there and worked out of the this again this kind of like dilapidated house that was on the grounds of the state capitol it was kind of like the media you know location i guess but it wasn't anything fancy it was the seattle times there the ap and then us um in just these different and it had been literally a house probably somebody who had like been a caretaker or something for the grounds of the of the legislature of the state capitol in olympia and now it was just like ah we'll put kvi in what used to be the converted bathroom or something but i wonder if like i wonder what the seattle times and and you know maybe to some degree it's like that kind Thank you. of reporting is it's being picked up by places like crosscut which does a really good job and some other you know some other entities uh you know kuow and to the northwest public i don't know why i'm doing this right now but like there are certainly still organizations that are focusing on that like austin jenkins does a super good job and he works kind of for public radio in the northwest kind of at large i think um so it's still happening but it's a it i think i would be mildly shocked if i went and saw kind of what it looks like now versus what it looked like back in 1995 when i was doing it or something yeah um but yeah if i were well let me put it this way well this could get really grim really fast if if i was still producing wisebacks show on talk radio 570 kvi and the legislatures were legislators were trying to do something that was even had a whiff of inclusivity would have come up on kvi too i'll tell you what and not for any

good reasons what did i hear whatever i'm about to say is a terrible idea to even bring up i was driving somewhere yesterday flipping through my am stations i'm just realizing kind of how that sounds like i i really do like i because i usually have my when i'm in the car i usually start by seeing what they're talking about on the sports station which is on the am dial and then i have several other presets in there um i got two am sports stations i have kicksy radio which is less and less music by the way i turned on kicksy radio at 3 p.m the other day and it's two computer nerds talking about ways to set up security on your on your windows 10 laptop that's not why we're turning into Kixi, folks.

Anyway, actually, to be honest with you, do you think that the average Kixi listener knows how to turn that on on their Windows 10 laptop?

No, it really was. It was about if you want to change the settings if your screen is going to sleep too quickly or if you want to make it so that you have to log back in when your computer goes to sleep.

I'm saying that probably if you have a listener base of people that need, it may be more like here's how you put your grandchildren into um speed dial on your cell phone or something yeah there's also a relatively new

station i have on the dial now too called the black information network here in seattle luke i stumbled on that and i really like that that's like pretty much like kind of just a como news radio with a little bit more of a focus on the black experience and and and news stories that affect the black community but it's also just like it's just like a good news source like i really like that it's apparently some sort of a i think it's you know it's like it's tied in with some national programming but it's they also have local they actually seem to have a small local newsroom anyway that seems new anyway i've been really digging the am dial recently um and unfortunately sometimes when you're clicking through you end up on there's a lot of conservative talk radio and in christian radio there too and i ended up on the medved show for a second oh sure because i was listening to medved the other day and he was talking about the january 6th stuff. And while he's a longtime conservative talk show host, he's not a trumper. And I was sort of interested in hearing his his take on what was going on with the January 6 investigation, which is actually not too far out of line from the tiny bit I heard from how you and I might feel about it. But then he starts doing a forward promo for something that was like, also coming up, There's a school in Washington, and no, it's not the Seattle district, if you can believe it, where they're saying that punishments will now start being doled out based on and considering the race of the child. Do we think that's a good idea? We'll be talking about that in a little bit. I'm like, the tease there is not, do we think that's a good idea, Michael Medved, by the way. That's all I know of that story was a tease on conservative radio. But it's kind of like, don't make that a question, Michael Medved. That's not a question of how you feel about that.

I want that to be your Counterpoint podcast. It's called Don't Make That a Question, Michael Medved.

That'll be my answer to Tweet of the Week on Friday. So I'll be like, don't make that a question, Michael Medved. Anyway, sorry. I'm rambling. I don't know why I took the show in that direction. But I was just trying to remember it as I was talking. And that's what happens.

All right. Let's take a quick break here because, Andrew, come heck or high water. I watched a movie on the flight home from Hawaii yesterday. And I've mentioned to you before that sometimes on Alaska Airlines, I've noticed that when you watch some movies, they're not edited at all. And it was mildly shocking to me because I was – oh, maybe it's the TV because I watched The White Lotus. and it's a pretty you know there are certainly a couple graphic moments and those were not edited out the swears were not edited out yeah um

But I guess they do the nice guys, the kind of crime comedy, the whatever you want to call it, buddy cop comedy that was with Russell Crowe and Ryan Gosling. I was watching that, and it is edited, but it took me a long time to figure it out. I just thought, oh, this is kind of cute. This guy keeps saying dink when I think he means a different body part. But okay. I literally thought it was a creative choice from the screenwriter. Have you seen that movie? Luke, I can't tell

I think I also watched that on a plane Although I might I might have I might have watched it on my own laptop But I'm pretty sure I saw that on a plane years ago

So there's a scene Where a kid They're trying to solve this disappearance Of a person and a bunch of other stuff And this kid kind of rolls up on a bike There's this house that's burned down And this kid rolls up on a bike And he's really young but he's very precocious And sort of cocky and the person whose house burned down was a person who was like a director of porno films and the kid's talking about his genitalia but he's young so that's the joke is that why would this kid be talking about his genitalia in this very kind of like adult way but he keeps saying like yeah my dink I got a big dink you guys want to see my dink and I thought it was the funniest thing to have this kid calling it dink And I only realized later that's because I didn't get that that was the edited version of the movie. I just thought that's clever.

Why do you have to edit the audio of a movie on an airplane? Edit the visual so you don't feel uncomfortable next to the people who might also be seeing your screen. But if you're wearing earphones, who cares?

Well, it's weird because I bet you that they edited that back when like, yeah, you're right. I guess we've never not been wearing some form of headphones on on planes. So I guess you're right. There would be there's never really been a time when we were all just watching our own content. Well, no, here's when it would have been in the earlier days of flying when they show a movie on the airplane. Everyone's wearing their headphones and looking at the same screen and same movie. In that case, obviously, they would edit things because they don't want to offend people. But for a long, long time, this has been a much more individualized experience. um what's notable is that like big lebowski which i have watched two times on flights recently which is weird where there's 8 000 choices and i go back to the big lebowski not once but twice big lebowski not edited and it's got some it's got ladies without shirts jumping on trampolines it's got stuff happening that i'm kind of like oh okay neighbors sorry let me try to tilt my

laptop screen away from you but i did forget because i was like lebowski doesn't have anything But, yeah, it's one of those dream sequences or something.

Well, the Jackie Treehorn stuff has got a little bit of nudity.

What was I going to say? Oh, I think our boy Lin Pham pointed this out. Sorry for the name drop, Lin. But you played tape of me. Not saying you see what happens, Larry, when you find a stranger in the Alps, but some other version of that. And I was like, why was I yelling that? I don't know if you're looking for that tape now, but you have like a clip of me yelling a different version, an edited version of what's actually said in that movie. And I couldn't figure out. Yippee-ki-yay, Mr. Fortune. Oh, that's a different one. But that's from the same show. You know what those are from is you were out and I had Hannah Brooks Olson co-hosting TBTL with me. And we had just launched our podcast about cleaning. So I gave her a quiz about how movies clean up dirty language. and i created a bunch of i created a bunch of alternative answers and that's why you have those things of those drops of me saying very weird lines from movies mr falcon yippee-ki-yay mrs finkel

yippee-ki-yay michael flatley i'm funny i was see i was uh i was confusing that with this other

you see what happens larry you see what happens when you free a sturgeon with an axe that's something that i made up because the the right answer would have been the the producers went with

you see what happens when you find a stranger in the alps so that was your those were your spoofs

that you wrote yes exactly so anyway just thanks for um the clarification there since my brain is

bad all right let's take a quick break and then when we come back we'll talk pickleball and nft sports drinks and the blurs days here on tvtl we was hoping for some razzle dazzle razzle dazzle

that's right man razzle dazzle on your mark on your mark get set get set now ready ready go

all right let's thank some dazzling donors these donors are dazzling us with the dough they're donating uh and it's uh well

it's vital to the mission here. You can call it we do a mission. I don't know. I'll tell you, listener and dazzling donor Megan Yoho certainly seems to be getting something out of TBTL. Megan is in Charlotte, North Carolina. Midtime listener, I wonder what that means. Midtime listener. I don't mean, like I understand what Megan is saying. I wonder what it actually, what that actually is like for Megan. Does that mean, that could mean anywhere between 11 years and four days.

Seven, I would say.

I would say you consider it. You're right. It's not four days. Like the mid would be like maybe because Megan missed the first eight shows. She considers herself a midtime listener. But it's probably seven years would be the minimum of midtime listenership.

Yeah. For some reason, I feel like seven is mid. I don't know. Four. If you're three or less, you're a new listener. You're new. So four years, maybe you're in that mid range. So maybe between four and seven years as you're a midtime listener.

All right. Well, Megan, however long it's been, we appreciate it. Megan says, mid-time listener, first-time dazzler, grateful I could up my donation during times like these. And Megan goes with capital T, capital L, capital T for times like these. I see you. I recently became a mental health counselor. Shout out to the Stens who answered my research question for one of my classes. By the way, I'll mention here that Megan, as now a newly minted mental health counselor, is going to mention some stuff coming up in this message that's a little more serious and deals with suicide. So fairly warned to be all of thee. And also a question, where be your nutcracker? Megan says, I'd like to give a shout out to the co-bros. I think that's us, Andrew. Normalizing living with anxiety and going to therapy. It can be hard to be a human on this earth, and it helps people to hear they're not weird for having a tough time. I think if there's anything that we've been able to provide the listeners, Andrew, on this show, it's an almost inexhaustible supply of us somehow having a tough time. Many, often in times that wouldn't seem on their face like they should be tough times for us. So to the degree that that's comforting to folks or makes their experience seem not outside the norm, I'm glad that that's a thing we're doing. I'm glad our ability to always have a tough time is serving some purpose in this world. Megan says, also, if anyone is thinking of ending your life, I promise that no one will be better off if you're not here. I swear. and Megan I would like to note is now a actual professional mental health counselor so Megan is not just shooting from the hip on this is something Megan has spent a lot of time studying thinking about and of course I think is completely right on Megan says thanks Luke and Andrew for all you do thanks to the 10s for being such an amazing community listener Megan in Charlotte mom to the 5 who has a Walsh Jesuit gym shirt oh yeah that's right i think i think we're emailing about that a while back yeah

it was the exact same gym shirt because at some point on this show i got on some jag if you can believe it about i i was remembering my walsh jesuit gym shirt the one that i officially had to wear in gym i remember the walsh jesuit and it was reversible i believe and it was because i remember you know the the colors there are maroon and gold at least that's how i describe it i don't know i mean it's probably in their in their fight song or whatever i think maroon and gold um but i'm pretty sure it was reversible and i could just like i suddenly had the sense memory of this shirt and um it turns out that megan's got one

of these shirts in her family wow that is um and it's is it does the kid go to walsh jesuit

My memory is no My memory is it was inherited Because I think it was a big oversized shirt On a younger child My memory is fuzzy though My memory is fuzzy No offense if I got that wrong, Megan

Also, this is apparently Charlotte is the five who played Heart and Soul Oh Like as in Dun, dun, dun Dun, dun, dun, dun I'm assuming With the singing dog or maybe the Huey Lewis song oh because she's hard and so oh yes I was going to say I don't know that but I do

know that

got it all hot loving every

night I remember sports I think it was sports or it might have been four was one of the first like I think probably cassettes that I rented not rent but borrowed from the library who busted my chops for saying rent I always say rent but I remember being a kid and just getting into the borrowing music from the library thing and I guess that's exactly

where huey lewis is for me like i'm not willing to commit to buying but i really liked the pop music i was young and boy you singing that really took me back sorry another jag i this story has

been told many many times on the program by me but my one of my a very very vivid memory from my childhood involves the huey lewis in the news album sport and it was peter williams had it on vinyl like or their family had it on vinyl and this was you know like just in the kind of living room they had a record player which is like a bunch of different albums including huey lewis sport and i remember but they had a hi-fi that you could plug like a little kind of probably crummy microphone into as well and i just remember sitting there and playing the album sport and singing along with it while reading the lyrics from the liner notes from the actual like you you slid that paper out the sleeve yes the paper sleeve that had the record inside it now we're reading it and the reason we were obsessed was because the song heart of rock and roll which is very was very smart by the band mentions every city in america so as a kid we just heard like seattle in there we were like we live in seattle and they're singing about seattle

Huey Lewis just mentioned us how I mean how could this even how could this happen that in a song

where Huey Lewis name checks 60 American cities that Seattle would be on the list it blew our minds and so we loved that song and then I just remember us I this might have only been like a one-time thing but I remember just sitting there and just it was it was proto karaoke like we did in the U.S. at least folks like us in the U.S. didn't yet know about something called karaoke but that's what it was sitting there singing along to Huey Lewis in the news

reading the liner notes I remember I had a um Radio Shack had a had a line of stereos and my very first stereo I was just looking at a photo of me I received it on my birthday it was one of those it wasn't portable right but it was it had a double cassette deck so you could dub tapes And it had a radio receiver amplifier

Well, Bozo did the dub, but yes

In this house, we believe And it had a turntable on top And it was a realistic clarinet 122, I want to say I might be wrong Yeah, like, I'm pretty sure Should we, oh, we're ruining this I'm ruining this dazzling donor message I'm pretty sure, like, realistic was the brand

Yes, that was a Radio Shack brand, I believe

Yeah, but then clarinet, I think, was, like, the model clarinet 122 What happens if I type that in? I'm getting a lot of clarinet stuff, so I don't know. Maybe it wasn't clarinet. I can't quite remember the sub-brand right now. Oh, no, no. Yeah, here it is. Vintage Realistic. Vintage? I am a young man, eBay. Don't say that my childhood. Oh, Luke, there she is. Vintage Realistic clarinet 122 AM FM stereo dual cassette turntable. Oh, my baby. I remember the feeling of pushing down these buttons, but I'm pretty sure there was a microphone jack in there as well. And at some point, I remember as I started messing around with audio stuff more and more, I remember realizing that you could sort of put a microphone in. You were really just supposed to use it to record onto the tape. But if you cranked the volume up really loud, you could treat it like an amplifier and you could amplify your voice through the speakers. I don't know that I did a lot with it, but it excited me.

Oh, I know. So it was like hearing, probably it was part of the beginning of me wanting to do this for a thing, maybe for a job or whatever. Like talking into that microphone and then hearing our voices, however faintly, coming back out through that little home stereo speaker was so thrilling as a kid. Anyway, to wrap up Megan's dazzling donor message. Now, of course, we've been talking about Megan and Charlotte, mom to the five, who has a Walsh Jesuit gym shirt. Also the five who played Heart and Soul And Doris the Singing Dog I wonder if Doris knows any Huey Lewis If not teach Doris

Probably not because Huey Lewis left Charlotte Out of that song by the way I looked it up and Charlotte is not in that song

Let's see I see the heart of rock and roll still beating in From what I've seen I believe I was literally trying to do a mental inventory I probably do leave Charlotte out I know that they get Cleveland's in there I know that for a fact San Francisco that's where they're from right Oh, yeah, because San Francisco comes after Seattle. He goes, Seattle, San Francisco to L.A., Hollywood, Sunset Strip.

Where they play their music?

Sunset Strip's not even a city.

You've already – L.A., Hollywood, and – have we talked about this? Probably. I feel like this comes up sometimes. But, yeah, in that one line, you mentioned L.A., Hollywood, and the Sunset Strip, but you don't mention Charlotte at all. So you've got three –

named la you've covered it now you've covered the neighborhoods yeah so you don't need to then get into the sub categories of la andrew the thing are we having deja vu because the thing about deja vu is you don't know when it's over is this over yet anyway uh megan says can you play the i like turtles kid i like turtles can we we just did thank you megan can i play do you mind if i

play the the long i like turtles when's the last time you heard that you probably not in a while go for it um i do like the long version of this because i forgot that there was a longer version

of this back here live at the waterfront village with my friend the zombie jonathan you're looking good jonathan just got an awesome face paint job what do you think i like turtles there you go

yes painted up and by the way i don't think he's even a zombie i think he's he looked more frankenstein-y to me but maybe it was a zombie i don't know maestro on your mark on your mark We've also got to thank Elizabeth Tuchel in Seattle, Washington. Elizabeth says, thanks for doing the show. Listening to my imaginary friends always brightens my day. Signed, Listener Elizabeth. She didn't say signed. It just is like a dash and then Listener Elizabeth.

To the point, though. To the point. I like it. We extended that previous Dazzling Donor message about as much as we possibly could. And a lot of that was on me, too. I covered a lot of annoying ground there.

Well, we were able to get to the—you know, I don't even want to make that joke because I don't want to get in your head. Because the whole way this show works is you and I both just constantly digress on whatever is coming into our mind. Yeah, but which one was the worst?

What were you about to bust the chopper?

Nothing was the worst. I was honestly I wanted to just make a snarky joke saying but we were able to figure out what the name the sub name of the realistic stereo was.

I'm actually glad you brought that back up because you know what I am going in the people love childhood photos of the Cobros. I assume I actually don't even know if that's true or not, but I believe I I'm not going to just use a photo of the clarinet 122. I am going to use a photo of me as a child on my birthday receiving the clarinet 122. So how about that? Yes. How about that for clickability, my friends?

Jalapeno. If I had that drop ready to go, I'd be playing it, but I don't. So I'll just play this one. Lake char, gog, gog, man, char, gog, shall, boon, gung, demog. That was all I could find in a pinch. No, I didn't want to make, I didn't even want to make like a joke about like, well, then we finally got, well, thank God, Andrew, you explained, x y and z to us because the whole show is us doing that you know what i mean that's and i don't i i think if if we actually stifled that if i stifled it or if you stifled it it would be well there'd

be much less show also i wouldn't believe you because i know that you love specificity like that one doesn't hurt for me because me remembering that is actually called the realistic clarinet 122 is actually i know the kind of detail that you like and i feel i do not lower my eyes to another mortal like i that you could have you could have picked out something else i rambled about but not this i feel too strong i just sent you this photo by the way i want your reaction to this photo i send it via email so i'm standing at the kitchen table our kitchen in valley city oh my god has been remodeled yeah yeah you were cute andrew i just want to say were you look like

was you were a cute kid oh my this is andrew zoom in on that clarinet man that's a sweet No, I'm zooming in on that pool in your backyard.

Yeah, and look, it's before the deck was built around it. Yeah, eventually a deck would be built all the way around that baby.

I have heard tell of the place you grew up as a young kid out there in Ohio so many times, but I don't think I've ever seen a photo of kind of the landscaping. I can see this yard, which is beautiful, but also was hours of work for you to prune and weed and maintain.

Yes, you can see a little bit of the pond. See that little green thing in the background? We call that the birdhouse.

Oh, that's the pond. yep exactly anyway oh man this is see and this is what i'm also saying andrew and this is the magic of tbtl because we needed to get the details on that stereo system it led to this photo which will be the show pic which is so great i'm i'm not even kidding andrew like you are adorable here you are an adorable kid so i mean i'm not that's not my way of saying that your experience that you had as a kid isn't valid it is but like you look you're i'm just i'm struck by what a cute kid you were all right uh let us wait do some top stories yeah let us i've only done the show 3 652 times so i'm still trying to remember how the formatics work yeah how about top stories

hello and welcome to top story i guess part of the problem is when i wait

almost a full hour to get to what is supposed to be happening 15 minutes

into the show my brain gets mildly confused uh governor jay insley was out in uh on bainbridge island washington recently uh the place where the game of pickleball was invented to make the official declaration that pickleball is the official state sport of washington he was out there with the guy who's the president of like pickleball usa or something which kind of raised a question for me which was like did pickleball usa i mean clearly it's a press event that the people from the people who sell pickleball equipment would be or or whatever promote you know pickleball monthly or all the various things around the this this game this sport obviously it's great for them to have this be declared the quote-unquote official state sport i wonder what's in it for the state of washington and jay insley i wonder how they got jay insley

to take time out of his schedule to go out there and do this i have an idea that you might not like and we don't have to do this but and i don't know how much i don't know how much you have on pickleball here luke and we can go deep on that if you have thoughts and i don't want to derail the show but as you were talking there i was like state sport now this didn't displace another state sport so before this there was no state sport so that got me thinking how many other states have the state sport and it looks like there's about 15 of them are you interested in me naming a state and you guessing what the state sport is based on what you know about that state because some of

these are kind of obvious that sounds fun i would do that now but am i am i doing it too soon did you have more on the pickleball topic well uh just two quick things on it uh one if it is officially the state sport what does that what are the implications of that for washingtonians yeah Does it mean that, like, I mean... You have to play it. You have to play it. Are they going to go door-to-door to enforce it? Yeah. To make sure? Are they going to take away... Are they going to confiscate everyone's number 12 banners related to the Seahawks so that they can replace them with, I guess it would be number 5? If you were, like, a pickleball... Depending on if you were going singles or doubles, I guess in pickleball you'd be a 5. Like, you'd be not playing, but, you know, you're really into it.

No, this is exactly the scenario that a lot of advocates have been worrying about for a long time at the NPA, which is the National Pickleball Association, which is jackboot thugs are going to come to our homes. They're going to take away Luke. They're going to take away our squash rackets and they're going to give us pickleball rackets. And that's the new reality. Thanks, Obama.

Maybe it was bad timing for Jay Inslee to say, amongst those rights in this country being the right to life. This literally was what he said at the signing. The right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of pickleball, he said to a chuckling audience.

I chuckled.

That's a legit chuckle from me. It actually is pretty cute. And for folks who are unfamiliar with what pickleball is, it's sort of like tennis, but you use these wooden paddles and you use this ball that has a bunch of holes in it that's kind of more like a wiffle ball than certainly a tennis ball. And you use a little bit less court than you do for full-on tennis. I know that it started out being something that was really popular sometimes with seniors and older folks because maybe there's a little less real estate to cover than a regular-sized tennis court. which could be maybe harder on your joints or whatever the backstory of pickleball's invention was kind of i thought was kind of interesting they signed this thing at the original home-based pickleball court which had been a badminton court on the shores of bainbridge island where the game was invented in 1965 what essentially happened was a couple of dudes barney mccallum bill bell i guess was a few dudes and joel pritchard were looking to entertain their kids uh and they were looking around and they couldn't find like a real badminton set like they which is always the problem in my experience with badminton is having all of the gear like you'll get because i loved badminton when i was a kid and like you know someone put up the net and then you'd like go find the badminton rackets and there was like two of them were just totally destroyed there'd be like one functioning one or you lost all of the shuttlecocks you know like or you're missing the rubber stopper on the shuttlecock yes exactly so then it doesn't really work because it's not you know the the whatever you want to call it the physics of it are now messed up so what they found was a wiffle ball and some like a couple like pieces of actual spare wood in this like shed and so that's what they that's what they played with their kids they just kind of hit this wiffle ball back with some pieces of wood and they named it pickleball because this guy Pritchard had a cocker spaniel named pickles who was like hanging out and watching right yes

that got me now pickleball is one of america's fastest growing sports with over four million players globally a bi-monthly magazine weekly tournaments and a national championship held twice a year now i'm actually andrew gonna do a tv story about pickleball now for uh old cbs because of this um no i actually we pitched it i pitched it like two months ago or something because i just have been noticing that pickleball is everywhere right now like it's getting it's really in the zeitgeist um but one of our producers on this uh email chain talking about pickleball cbs producers is a tennis player and he was saying like off the record we really don't like pickleball players because they're taking over all of our tennis courts yeah i could see that um and i thought that was kind of interesting and then i uh was out in uh for a little run in hawaii yesterday and i went by all these tennis courts in waikiki and they were all people playing pickleball on

huh that's interesting because it's a little bit more accessible than um tennis well they modify

the court so you play on a tennis court but i don't know if you uh i think you play with the tennis net but you but the the back line if you will is uh is much is much closer just everyone was standing really close to the net and there were these other things that were set up these other kind of nets that i think were representing the out of bounds or something okay or they This was kind of a blur, but they somehow reconfigure the standard parameters of a tennis court so they can play pickleball on it. But I don't get the sense that you can fit way more people on it. It'd be one thing if you could get five pickleball games going on one standard tennis court, but it's not like that. I think a pickleball match eats up the amount of space that a tennis match does or a game of tennis. So this does seem to be – I'm sure we'll have to point out in our CBS, our hard-hitting journalistic piece, Andrew, about this, that it does seem to be displacing some tennis players because it's so popular. And my theory is people like it because it's fun, and I don't think it has – I think the learning curve is less steep than some other racket sports, which can definitely take some time to get the finesse down.

yeah like and there's an elitism around a lot of the racket sports too i think yes yeah yeah like

it's the gear is kind of expensive or like you said you know if it's squash or or racketball it could be like do you have access to like a health club that has it but this is like you can pretty much go out there with some pretty cheapo gear and and whack this thing around and and have fun we took racket sports was an actual gym class when i was in high school that sounds fun i was mr case who was the racket sports i mean he was the gym teacher but his specialty was racket sports at nathan hale high school i loved that dude and i loved racket sports because he just cycled through uh we did badminton we did pickleball i guess that would probably i don't think we did tennis i think he might have been also the tennis coach but i don't think that they had us just like regular kids in gym do tennis because it would have just kind of gone nowhere for most of us but um uh i yeah i i have enjoyed uh pickleball at various points in my life and i think it's interesting to see that it is like really really taking off um so just if you live in washington just know they're coming for you okay they will be they'll be at your door sooner rather than later it'll be like a mike and the mechanic song um except this plot is about them forcing you to play pickleball now andrew can we talk state sports yes i want to do this i'm very excited

how i do it because i've been looking at this list and i it's going to be a little bit tough because some of these um some of these sports are like kind of hobbies or even individualistic hobbies or club type of hobbies and some are just like straight up like sports um like team sports or whatever so i'm going to start with one that i think will meet and i can maybe give you some hints along the way since it is a wide range but i'm going to start with what i think would be Maybe the easiest one Luke what do you think The official state sport of Minnesota is This became the official state sport Of Minnesota in 2009 I mean that seems like a no brainer It would be hockey Ice hockey indeed Look you're off to a great start Okay I think this one is kind of easy too Alaska In 1972 The state of Alaska adopted this As their state sport What do you think of when you think of people in Alaska What are they doing i guess i'm gonna go well they're taking their first public radio job as a lot of my friends

did yes as i as i at one point considered me too in barrow alaska which is 600 miles north of the arctic circle but this alaska one is tougher for me because i've got a few different theories or a few different ideas one would be snowshoeing one would be um sled racing yeah i think that's

Sled racing meaning with the dogs. Yes, dog mush.

dog mushing it is dog mushing see that's an issue having watched some some tv shows and things uh about and read about like you know um dog sled racing it is very very time consuming and involved you got to take care of all these dogs you got to train with them like to me the official sport of a state seems like it should be something that as many people as possible are interacting with but dog sled racing seems like that just is a big lift the average alaskan i'm imagining isn't doing

that uh that's yeah that is a good point although i think that the average alaskan does rally around it i think they have these big events and so so it's in their life now sport doesn't mean you

have to play it it just means we're all into it in one way or another okay and i'm trying to kind

of make this uh manageable so i'm going to give you kind of a clue uh here's a clue here um California and Hawaii both share the same state individual sport. Some of these are divided up. Yes, indeed. Surfing. Indeed. California and Hawaii both have surfing. By the way, Hawaii also has a state team sport. I think this is very interesting. Outrigger canoe paddling. Yeah. That's what I would have said.

I'm not kidding. Are you serious? A hundred percent. I mean, it's a well-known thing, particularly amongst the locals. You know, it's, it's a, I was thinking about this because of having just been in Hawaii and getting up, I was getting up pretty early because a, we were doing the show at 7am local time and because my internal clock was off. Although I'll tell you when I woke up this morning, I was like, why am I so tired at seven o'clock? It's like, oh, cause it's four o'clock. Oh yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

But I was thinking about surfing as being an interesting thing because every morning when i would get up and it would i would getting up and it was just becoming dawn and i would look and there'd just be all these surfers in the water and we think of surfing like the the ethos or not the ethos but the kind of like stereotype of a surfer is kind of like a wha pal you get so pitted kind of spicoli from fast time just kind of like a i don't want to say a a burnout but somebody who's just kind of like just vibing sort of just vibing and just so whatever but it's like you know what surfers are really doing they're getting up at the ass crack of dawn yeah and going out like i was like these surfers are these surfers are getting up earlier than i did when i was producing morning radio or whatever like they love this so much and you know the time when this is the best is often in the early morning and probably in the late afternoon but i would i guess what i want to say is we don't give surfers enough credit for how much they're setting an alarm yeah no kidding and

And also that is when the waves are tastiest, Luke, is the phrase you were looking for.

That's what you always say. Oh, my gosh. I watched something on TikTok last night that is just nightmare fuel for me because it's an actual – it's a literal stress stream that I have, Andrew, but I was watching it in real life. And as I was watching it, I was like, stop this right now, Burbs, because you're just giving oxygen to this fire. that is i have a semi-recurring stress stream where i am somewhere where the water is very clear and blue and i'm about to go in it um like you know it's the ocean obviously but then for some reason i look down and let's say i may be on a rock outcropping i'm in some way i have a perspective a vantage point on the water that i can really see what's happening in the water and it's full of scary water creatures specifically sharks yeah and it's like i was about to go in it And other people are in the water. And I still, for some reason in the dream, am considering, I don't know why, but I'm considering going in, but trying to do it in a way that will make me least likely to get attacked. I never get in the water in the dream, but it's just this idea of like, hey, this is the ocean. It's beautiful. And then I look down and then I realize how scary it really is. So this TikTok was a guy who's flying a drone out over this impossibly beautiful blue tropical water somewhere. I don't know where it was. and then there's this just like sun dappled blonde kid surfer kid who's like a tween and like they're like this kid's just on his surfboard paddling around there's a huge shark in the water right oh god and the guy who's watching all this with his drone is also kind of narrating it and he's basically like he's like i'm gonna tell this kid if he gets too close to the shark so

eventually he's like hey there's a shark in there how is he telling him can he broadcast via his

drone no um i think he's just on the shore kind of yelling yeah okay i think they were close enough that he could yeah he could just yell to him but the kid didn't seem that freaked out he was just like i'll tell i'll just tell you when you know the shark's too close to you it's like okay and the kid's just kind of on his board and you're just this giant black shape that's as big as the surfboard and then at some point the kid starts paddling and the shark starts following him i like this and the guy says hey it's getting close and the kid's like okay and then the shark turns around he goes turned around and then the kid like catches a wave and surfs it in jeez louise and i was just like this is pretty much my worst case scenario yeah no kidding so also because it's really hard

to stand up on a surfboard too oh i mean that's part of my scenario that would be if i if my

survival if a shark was chasing me and my survival my survival was was dependent on me being able to hang 10 dude oh my gosh it would be so bad suddenly i have a core i didn't know i had a

core um i want to go through a few more of these because i find some of these very interesting i'm going to give you another hint on this one what so texas south dakota and wyoming all have the same sport i don't know that you would immediately think of this as a sport luke but think of texas what do you think texas is probably calf roping rodeo rodeo yeah so we're gonna do that washington as we said is uh pickleball what do you think north carolina state sport is again this is right on the money nope really nope fat i'm that's interesting i feel

like there's so much like think more culturally north carolina tobacco drying vroom vroom stock car racing oh right that's such a blind spot for me yeah yeah i am the worst it's stock car racing

though huh yeah i guess is nascar i believe are those stock cars i believe nascar is stock are

stock cars yeah i could be wrong about i was just trying to picture i was trying to this again this is this is how completely out of touch i am with with motorsports like um i always forget that that's so huge in north carolina it's like a big big deal so okay now you're a smart boy i wonder

if you because i think that i would not get this but you've proven yourself i've not given you a chance on some of these like um the uh the canoe paddling so i'll give you some space on this one maryland has two one is a state sport one is a state team sport um i think i think the state sport that like the individual one you're probably not going to get i find that very interesting you might cross yes you're a smart boy that's the state team sport adopted in 2004 lacrosse is the team sport of maryland the individual sport do you want me to give you a shot at it i would have never guessed this 1962 it was 19 okay 1962 individual sport of maryland

by the way the reason i thought of lacrosse is because i believe that lacrosse was originally a native american game and i have a sense that it was sort of picked up in that kind of the mid-atlantic like virginia places like that where um it was some version of it was was was being played by native americans i think that the white people learned about it from them i didn't know that so i think of that region of the country as being the heart of a lacrosse culture although the name lacrosse is french so i don't know maybe it came down from france i could i'm the problem is i'm high on getting that right and so now i'm pushing it too far as i often do and saying stuff

that will be dead loud wrong and get a lot of emails it's the oldest organized sport in north america with its origins in indigenous canada so that would explain why you have the indigenous population but you also have the the french influence so look at you yes okay well i would

i should have just left it alone i i said native american that's not i said native americans and these were maybe native canadians although let's be honest the boundary between what we call america and canada yeah pretty arbitrary i guess so let's just say people or let's say the people that got here first and who we just absolutely completely and totally um screwed over in every conceivable

way so you got lacrosse as the team sport of maryland but there's an individual sport of maryland i'll give you some hints again 1962 on the water is it something not on the water it is a competitive sport is it the water you're saying it's not the water it's it's not the water i'll tell you this it is a competitive sport so it is one person up against another person

Okay. Does it involve any equipment?

It does, most certainly. Most certainly. In fact, I think of the equipment first, yes. Oh, fencing. Jousting. Jousting, whoa! I know. You know what? It's funny. I was sort of looking at jousting and picturing fencing, but you're right. That's different. Jousting is when you're on horses. Yeah, you know what? That's so funny. Until you said fencing, I was looking at jousting and picturing fencing. But yeah, either way, my clue stands. you definitely think of the equipment first jousting how did that become the state sport

of maryland 1962 what were they doing in 1962 mel magazine get me the oral history of how jousting became the maryland's like like you said andrew what was going on in 1965 that that was a thing um 62 but yeah 62 that somebody was promoting like that feels like somebody was trying to open a jousting school you know what i mean like these these announcements because these things don't matter i feel like a lot i mean they don't really matter i feel like a lot of the time it comes from like somebody who's trying to maybe it would have been like the maryland jousting association or something where they were like hey if we can get this declared as the national individual sport maybe that'll give us a little bit more visibility or whatever i want to get was there one guy who got some jousting whatever you call them poles and he was like how would i do with these i don't know let's let's uh let's see if i can get somebody

to make this the sport do you think it's related at all to the cuban missile crisis everything is

related yeah i wonder if that's part of it andrew if you go deep enough uh commission all of it i

want to give you one more here because i don't want this to get too tedious i might have already

missed the window on that but as long as i'm getting them right it's not tedious at all for

me what do you think the the um state sport of new york is the state of new york named last year in 2021 oh okay well that's a biggie but because yeah new york yeah just in a certain way i want you to not overthink this well basketball then new york baseball baseball indeed

i just said new york jousting um fencing on horses actually no fencing is in selling stolen goods on a corner in a trench coat with a bunch of watches inside of your trench coat that would be a good halloween costume although i don't think anyone under 40 would get it yeah like that was a whole that was a whole vibe when we were kids in the in the movies whether it was a comedy or whether it was like a you know a columbo style show you always had a guy on a corner with a trench coat he would open it up and it would have a bunch of watches or some other like expensive stolen stuff inside it and i feel like that is just not something that'd be a funny halloween

costume to me i sort of feel like the trench coat used to fit into a lot of tropes of yesteryear that don't like from the like the the pervert on the bench sure apologies or the or the flasher i I don't know if that's the same thing. The person who opens up the coat and is full of watches to sell your gumshoe Columbo kind of trench coat. Your two children trying to pretend to be an adult. Oh, yes. Well, that one is timeless. That one is as relevant today as it ever was.

Well, Luke, it ain't a thurs if you don't blurs, so let's get to it.

Uh-huh. I like that. Got a note from our- You're getting a tattoo that says that. Got a note from our friend Bette here, who I believe is in New York. What's the state sport of New York, Luke? The state sport is basketball. Exactly. Bette says, ah, I'm late. Happy, happy 12th Blur's Day to my wonderful five, Lucy. By the way, I think Bette was just like an hour late on this or a couple of hours late. I got this last Thursday. But it is the 12th Blur's Day of Lucy. Bette says, you are smart, creative, kind, and caring. You always look out for your friends and are just an all-around amazing human being. I'm lucky to be called Mom by you. I hope you have great blurs. I hope you had a great blurs from Mom and Bob. We love you so much.

Rachel from Kalamazoo says, Happy 30th Blurs Day to Andrew from your future wife, Rachel. This is how I'm finding out. This is how I'm finding out I was tempted to make that joke But I thought you would think it was beneath the dignity Of this program, Andrew Who's going to make that joke And I was like, no, this will make Andrew uncomfortable He doesn't like it When I blur the lines of Who's romantic towards whom That's what I mean when I say blurs day I mean these lines are going to get blurred

I think we have a show title Blurs the lines

Rachel says i love living life with you our two kitties donnie and lou and our newest family member

ziggy the dog ziggy that's a great name for a dog that makes me want to get a dog and name it ziggy

i got home so late last night like the flight i was i didn't even get in into my apartment until almost

2 a.m. And I swear, I had to fight the urge to, while lying in bed, go on the Oregon Humane Society website and look at cats.

Thimble, by the way, the cat you had your eye on, was off the website very quickly. I looked for it the day that you grabbed that. Later on that day, it was already off the website.

I mean, you know. Very cute kid. People know cute when they see it. Indeed. That's why this show is so popular. I hope your year is This is still from Rachel in Kalamazoo To her future wife Oh excuse me future husband Andrew From his future wife I hope this year is super good to you And that you have lots and lots of fun At your ramen party this weekend I love you

That's nice ramen party

Invites me to ramen parties

Gotta get married James says I want to wish a happy Blur's Day to my wife April in Maine She's been a 10 since 2010 and converted this 11 to full-blown 10-hood. Thanks, James. Nice. She's been with me on many adventures, moving across the country multiple times, and raising two very active and creative fives. So happy Blur's Day, April, from James and your pals at TBTL.

Jennifer says, I'd like to give a birthday shout-out to me. My official Blur's is on Sunday the 3rd, and I'd like to remind myself that I'm baby-stepping,

and I'm doing the work.

Even though I'll be 50, yikes, and have been a 10 for about one quarter of my life. Sound machine boring sound. Wait, which one? Booing sound. I think that's maybe. Oh, booing sound. Excuse me. Sorry, I didn't see that coming.

Do you have it?

Do we have, is there a boo on the sound machine?

I mean, I have my, I have my, my Halloween sound effect. I have this one. I think this is what she's looking for Oh, no, no, Andrew, it says boing sound Oh, boing sound Oh, sorry, I thought it was a typo You said boring, I said booing But it's boing Boing Happy boing, Jennifer I'm trying to get a job at the boing plant It's up in Everett this is from Aiden to her dear friend Kathy you have made history by having your actual birthday on the actual blurs day an amazing achievement from an amazing woman this year let's go through another case of that good champagne it just says champagne I was just adding some flair to it while solving all the world's problems even though no one seems to notice that between the two of us we have all the answers I can't imagine life without your precious, precious, without your precious friendship. That is, to Kathy, from somebody who's going by the name Aiden. I don't think that's really this person's name, but I believe it's an inside joke.

Okay. Wait, is that also from Hamilton or whatever? We got Hamiltoned. We got Hamiltoned. You got Hammed. Somebody wrote, I don't know if it was a Blur's Day or something else, but it was all full of Hamilton references, But because you and I don't know anything about Hamilton Yeah It was completely lost on us Yep That's fine Anne says a happy blurs To the wonderful Grandma Gers Nice Love Anne and the boys

Nice Happy Blurs Day Grandma Gers Happy Blurs to the Gers

I wonder if that's like being the goat But instead of greatest of all time It's Grandma Under Wait, unders, that's going to take us in a bad direction. Let's see, gers. What does that stand for? Greatest uncle.

I'm trying to think. So what would be the relationship between an uncle and a grandma? Retired. We know that. Oh, okay.

Uncle retired from something.

You put us here. That's fair.

That's fair. What do you think it's like for the listeners to hear two master improvisers at the top of their game? Like, I wonder, sometimes I just want, it's like, it's like, you know, magic versus bird. It's just like two people who are maybe better at this than anyone has ever been or ever will be squaring off at the absolute peak of their abilities. I mean, it's, it sounds weird to say it, but you're welcome to the listeners that you get to hear this.

Greatest Understander of Relative Success. Get Comedy Bang Bang on the line. Scott, I want to be on your show. Ellie says, A very happy Blur's Day to my dad, Todd, a St. Paul, Minnesota 10. From the TBTL snippets I've overheard in the house lately, he's currently time banditing in January.

Who knows when this message will get to him. But, Dad, I hope you had a great birthday back in April and that you have a great Blur's Day today, too. Love ya. That's from Ellie. I love it. So it's clear that Todd is the one who listens, but Ellie listens enough to know the term time bandit. And that is true familial love.

Sure is. Tim says, I'd like to wish a happy Blur's Day to my ex-wife and TBTL daughter, Alex, whose actual date of Blur's is today, March 31st. She is still the only 10 I know in real life, and she has written in Blur's Days for me each of the last couple of years, which I really appreciate. I remember that. Thanks, Alex. You're a very good co-parent, despite your old age. Ooh.

I see. Is that our first kind of like zinger in a Blurs? Could this be a new era? I kind of like the.

Between exes, but who seem to have a very amicable relationship. I mean, that's got to be one of a kind on the show.

Yeah, yeah. Despite your old age. Now we got this one from Holly in Lakewood, Ohio. This just came in, I think, just this morning. Holly says, I only know one other 10 in real life. So I thought I better wish myself a happy golden blurs day. That means that my actual blurs day falls on today, Thursday, or whatever we're calling that now. We do have – it sounds like several people are having these, like, blurs on the day of blurs today. And we never came up with a good – you know, I think Max in Brooklyn texted me an idea about that, but I can't remember what it was. But we haven't come up with a good name for that when your blurs falls on a thurs. Yes.

Yes. Well, we could call it the blurs on the thurs.

Keep it locked in We got blurs on the thurs Anyway, Holly says thanks Love you guys So Holly sent that in for herself Because she only knows one other ten And you can't just count on people like that But Luke People are going to let you down Not in the TV televerse Look what's up next here I'll let you read it

Jill, also in Lakewood, Ohio Happy Blurs Day to listener Holly A.K.A. Ginger and Tonic From Jill A.K.A. Intel Jill Intel Jill Intel Jill Intagel Intagel That's how you say it Like an integer Like an integer Like the math term Yeah Hopefully the numbers stay good And derby scrimmages will start up soon I think we all feel that way, Jill You speak for all of us

So obviously these are their roller derby names

Oh, I didn't know that Till then, I hope you have a great day of blurs Look at that, Holly.

Yeah, Holly. Jill came through. And also, shout out to Lakewood, Ohio, where one Andrew Walsh used to live with his clarinet 122. Was that right? I mean, you were pretty close to Lakewood in that photo, right? No, in that photo, that was Valley City. So that was actually. Later you lived. Was Burgundy Bay near Lakewood? Both in. No, Burgundy Bay was also in Medina County. But also, and I'm trying to think, did I still have. I don't know. for something that was such a huge part of my life talking about that that um stereo unit that i had which honestly i mean i love that thing so much i honestly don't know without that like if i would be in the career i am today like there was something about that like that really spoke to me i don't have any recollection of when i gave that thing away or whatever i did with it like it's not anywhere at any parent's house or anything and i'm sure at some point i got very excited about cds i remember my very first cd player but that was more of like a huge boom box with detachable speakers it was sort of an in-between thing kind of like that giant remember when i was transitioning luke from um using like full pc computers all the time to laptop computers so i got the largest laptop in the world i just remember that i just pulled that out of a bag yesterday and hooked it up to our tv because that's how we kind of watch media on one of our tvs that thing is so heavy i understand you used to tease me about it a lot but i was like i don't No, it's just a laptop with a big screen. That thing is heavier than me. That thing is so heavy.

I handed it to Genevieve, and she almost couldn't pick it up. Was that the one that you were kind of describing as a quote-unquote gaming laptop?

Yeah, it was technically a gaming laptop, and I got it not for games, but because I wanted that computing power because I was doing a lot of video editing and stuff like that. So anyway, it is funny how now, in hindsight, I look at that thing as so big. Anyway, that was kind of like what my first CD player was. So it's kind of a transition from like a big stereo system to a boom box because it was like a big boom box. But the speakers could detach and you could kind of put them around the room if you wanted to. But anyway, I have no idea what happened to my clarinet, man. It kind of bums me out.

Yeah, I wonder if that's the kind of thing that your dad would have just like taken down to the goodwill at some point. I mean, I don't think that anybody would have made a decision on that without me. I'm sure. should look at my college photos did that make its way even to college i kind of doubt it so yeah i have no idea at some point i must have made a decision that technology had come too far and that thing wasn't doing it for me and i got rid of it in some manner you were right technology has come too far way too far i don't even know what i'm saying anymore we got to get out um i uh i really

do want to talk about russell wilson tomorrow and this because i feel like and it's not gonna i'm Again, I'm hoping that it will be a conversation that's interesting to people who aren't sport people because I've almost no interest in the X's and O's of Russell Wilson in Denver or having been in Seattle. Like that's all whatever it is. Will he be good there? Was he good for the Seahawks? All that is sports talk. The the the experience of like loving someone so much. I loved Russell Wilson because he was a Seahawk and he was really good. and then sort of ignoring so many of their annoying behaviors. The experience of that person going and wearing different laundry, as old Jerry Seinfeld would say, and then suddenly seeing everything they do through this new lens has been really something. So I kind of want to talk about that tomorrow. And then I also want to talk about this story that I got mildly obsessed with while I was in Hawaii, which is the fairly, I guess, believable allegation that Stephen Jenkins, the lead singer of the band Third Eye Blind, has been actively lying about being the valedictorian of Cal Berkeley when he went there, which involves all the things I love in the world. Petty bullshit that doesn't matter and questionable Wikipedia posts. It's really kind of it's everything I'm looking for on a Friday. So that's what we're going to do tomorrow That sounds like a plan to you Yeah, that sounds great That sounds great Okay, thanks for listening everyone As I just mentioned We'll be back here tomorrow with more of this Whatever this is, so please do join us Then, until then have a great Thursday Take care of yourselves, stay safe And please remember, no mountain too tall And good luck to all

Dude, you got the best barrels ever, dude. Just like you pull in and you just get spit right out of them. and you just drop in and just smack the lip, whoopah, drop down, snap, ah, and then after that, you just drop in, just ride the barrel and get pitted, so pitted, like that. Power out.