Muse

What is this? No, dudes, dudes, dudes, you can't park your bikes here, okay? This is a working hospital. Your Wi-Fi sucks. We don't have Wi-Fi, that's why it sucks. Take it to a World Wide Web Cafe. Go! Smells like a Spin Doctors concert in here. T-B-T-L Guess what day it is? Guess what day it is?

It's Friday. Friday. Gotta get down on Friday. Everybody's looking forward to the weekend. How can I do those if I'm going to be a comedian or a writer? I don't even know how to write.

Holy forking shirt balls. We're in the good place.

all right hello good morning and welcome everyone to a friday edition of tbtl the show it just might be too beautiful to live podcaster the future of show business my name is luke

burbank i am your host oh my god he unmuted coming to you from the hollywood broadcast

center right here in portland oregon where we are looking at a an actually cloudy day It's going to struggle to get to 80 degrees today, but next week it's going to be 103, which seems warm, feels warm to me. As I mentioned yesterday, we've had a real vibe shift here in this house regarding me and Bubbles, the kitten.

A cat is an angel that poops in a box.

I got a few different spray bottles that I can now use to hit her with a little water if she's getting up on a counter or something where I don't want her to be. Didn't know you like to get wet, though. And it's very effective. But now we have the issue. I've only used it like three times on it. But now we have the issue of when I come out of the bedroom or I come around the corner, she looks at me like i'm wearing a jacket made out of cat fur or like i just have like this the skulls of all the cats that i vanquished hanging from some sort of vest that i'm wearing like she's terrified of me now so we're gonna have to find a middle ground where i can keep her from getting on things but not have her completely petrified of me uh petrified all All right, here we are at episode 3,733 in a collector series.

Let the fun begin.

Yesterday on the program, we talked about this quarterback for Kentucky who does a weird thing with his coffee.

This song goes out to all the coffee lovers of the world.

He apparently puts mayo in his coffee. So I have here on the desk in front of me, I've got a coffee mug from Montelupo Italian Market here in Portland. I've got a bottle of Whole Foods Market 365 Organic Mayonnaise. That one's plastic. It doesn't make such a cool sound. And we're going to let the great experiment begin.

The great experiment begins!

In a few minutes here, I'm going to actually try mayo in my coffee. Much to the consternation of Andrew Walsh, I can tell you that. Also, if we have time, we should talk about Dr. Oz. Mehmet Oz, the noted snake oil salesman who is just getting memed to death by his opponent in the Pennsylvania Senate race, John Fetterman.

He's got like every meme ever produced on the Internet.

He can knock us out with his memes. Or more accurately put, whoever's handling the John Fetterman Twitter account is really roasting whoever's handling the Mehmet Oz Twitter account. So we will talk about that. And we'll talk to this guy, the aforementioned longest running co-bro of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. He is Andrew Ziggle Zagat.

Let's get back at it.

Walsh, and he is joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

Hey, Luke. I feel like this is a bummer, too, because I don't have anything like really on top of my mind today that I want to talk to you about. But I feel like I could, I feel like I could come up with something intriguing, something that will draw you into the conversation that will lead to many tangents so that suddenly we look down. It's been 40 minutes. You never put mayonnaise in your coffee and it's time for a break. I want to talk about that. I want to.

I do want to talk about. Oh, sorry. I'll let you finish. No, I'm done. this came up on the show yesterday and i said because andrew i'm always looking to make hashtag content i was like we're talking about the kentucky quarterback said well and i knew i mean i knew well enough that this was a non-starter for you that's fine i didn't drag you into it i said i'm gonna go ahead and uh i should try this tomorrow on the show just to see what it tastes like that would be a fun an experiment and the horror in your voice and really honestly just the the disdain that you had for that notion and that you apparently continue to have for what i'm about to do is surprised me even by your standards of not wanting to eat or drink stuff you consider to be gross but

you don't even want me to drink stuff you can i don't and i guess that's not fair i guess if you respect my decisions not to participate in these things i should support your decisions to do it

Is it going to make you gag the thought of what it is I am doing?

You sent me a photo of a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise next to a cup of coffee, and you said, hey, possible show pick. There's nothing specifically gross about the photo. It's a nice little photo of a cup of coffee and some squeeze mayonnaise next to it. That's it. Everything's clean. The bottle has no fingerprints on it. It doesn't look sticky. Everything's fine. But it did make me gag a little bit, just the thought of it.

I'm not trying to torture you with this. I just feel like I'm first of all, I'm curious what it tastes like, and I think it could be good radio for the listeners, at least those that don't have misophonia. But again, I didn't realize that this was actually by extension putting you in a difficult position. I figured as long as I wasn't trying to make you do it, it wouldn't be.

No, I mean, that's fair. It shouldn't be. I just have a weird relationship with mayonnaise. Like I said, like I if I order a sandwich now and it comes with some sort of mayonnaise, I don't even tell them to hold the mayonnaise anymore, mostly because I'm telling them to hold so many other things that it's like, you know, I tell them to hold the cheese. I'm like, OK, I'll deal with the mayonnaise in a lot of cases. So, like, it's not even like it's something that that never passes these bearded lips anymore. But still, the idea that actually triggers my. Yeah, exactly. Just a little bit. Oh, yeah. No, it's an arms race, my friend. But I'm trying to think There are other things I used to say That used to gross you out too I think you've become accustomed to daddy talk That used to make you very uncomfortable But you seem to

Yeah, I've just been I mean, honestly I could only push back against that tidal wave for so long Yeah, exactly And also there is a Toyota Yaris in my building That has zaddy on the license plate

Which makes daddy seem relatively tame by comparison Well, I guess maybe one thing I could do Is I could start calling you daddy And then we'll see how that goes That would re-up my subscription to Weirded Out Magazine. Anyway, before you do that, let's see. I had some really complicated dreams last night or two nights ago. I could tell. What do you think is less interesting? The other day I opened my mouth and had a couple of things I wanted to tell V.

Anybody who works in podcasting will tell you. You start with the essential question of what do you think is less interesting?

What do you think people want to hear less? I literally almost put this on a Twitter poll yesterday. what do you think just in podcasting but also just in life in conversation what are people less interested in what do they what do they want to hear less of people talking about their dreams or people talking about their fantasy sports teams you look like a dream catcher came to life uh you did not put that on twitter though so we don't know the answer i don't know the answer but what do you think i'm posing it to you man that's a tough one because i will say that i

i even though i will on the occasion i'll play some fantasy football and by play i mean you know participate in it i do find and that don't don't please don't take this personally because i know that the um high school bud ceilings does come up on the occasion i don't find other people's fantasy teams that i have no relationship with particularly fascinating like there's a um when i listen to the mariners games i have to do it on sirius xm radio because they don't allegedly it's on a radio station here in portland but i can never find that radio station no matter how many small transistor radios i purchase i could never find it so i just end up listening to it on my phone but that means they don't play the real commercials they just play an endless loop of like the same three promos for other serious satellite sports shows and one of them is about like all fantasy like how to win all your fantasy leagues and i can't think of something i would could give fewer shits about like if that's a promo for a show where people talked about other

people's dreams there's a chance you would be slightly interested in that yes so i'm going to

say i think fantasy sports is less interesting than dreams i think you're right too i also think

it depends on the um you know it's a hard poll to take like if i um if i were to put this on my twitter feed i think a lot of people that i interact with on twitter are people who like are in the sports world or like you know work at 710 espn or love the mariners i got a bunch of mariners like twitter people so like they might be more interested in talking about sports than dreams you know but generally speaking i think the general populace would be like okay i don't want to hear about your dreams but geez it i mean if something weird happened in your brain overnight that

could possibly be more interesting than you know whether or not you benched the wrong player in june you know like i find it and again that these are two these are two the reason it popped into my head was because the other day i sat down i wanted to talk to genevieve about the dreams i had and my fantasy team and i realized i shouldn't do that to her if i want to remain in this relationship much longer now if you have a dream about shohei otani oh my god if you have a dream where you're just doing your fantasy lineups. Hey, one other thing real quickly.

One thing on that. I believe it was Vanessa who really accurately summed up the entire endeavor by always pronouncing it fantasy. She would never, because that was when I was more heavily into my fantasy football team, and I would be trying to tell her about it. I'd be like, yeah, I had Chad Ochocinco. I needed three catches from him. Fantasy.

I didn't know she did that, but I kind of put me in my place. That's really good. One thing I was going to say about the listening to commercials during the baseball game. So mostly I listen to the games and mostly I listen on just like the local airwaves. Right. So I hear all the local commercials over and over and over again. The past few weeks I've been listening to the games, but through not the same app you're listening on, but through the MLB app. And so wherever the MLB app gets their ads, it's all through like Audacity or something. So I hear all kinds of podcast apps for Audacity. Like you don't hear those, right? Like it's amazing that depending on how you listen, you can hear three different sets of commercials over and over and over and over again. And that will sort of define your summer. Like I've been hearing this. That's such a good point. It's like whatever stream you choose and then you're going to hear these things millions of times.

Because there's so many games, and the games are so long, and there are so many breaks. And for me, the bane of my existence is Chris Mad Dog Russo going, you want baseball? The doggies got you covered. Literally, he screams, you want baseball? The doggies got you covered. And I want to jump out a window. And I hear that conservatively 40 times. every time i want to engage with seattle mariners baseball i have to hear chris mad dog russo say

you want baseball the doggies got you covered would it not be amazing if brutal if chris mad dog russo his whole persona was just like a very calm collected like look at both sides like a really a really contemplative sports show that would be stein that would be amazing uh yeah it's

I mean, this seems extreme. One of the things that, you know, the Sirius Satellite Radio is not cheap. It's a few hundred bucks a year. And I, of course, I like to listen to Stern. But part of the appeal for me, too, is the fact that it's got a lot of it's got all the football games. I think it has NBA, NFL and MLB on it. But I'm almost about to break down and sign up for like the MLB service, which I don't know how much it is per year. I don't think it's that much for just radio just so I can get away from the Mad Dog Russo promos. Like seriously because you're exactly right Andrew If you listen to as much baseball as we do The particularly repetitive Commercials that come up become part of the Sonic architecture of your summer And if they're bad like they're very bad There's another one that's for a Wrestling podcast That is Like where they're singing at the end of the promo And again it's just Absolutely brutal I have to get away from that The other problem is I'm about Maybe a minute and a half behind the rest of you who are watching it on tv or listening on the conventional radio and so there will be periods of time where i can't engage with my phone i can't look at any texts from y'all because it'll just be i'll just see like a gif of carlos santana playing smooth and i'll be like oh okay something good i mean that's actually not the worst i don't mind if it's spoiled in the positive direction like if i find out that the mariners did well i'm like cool but if i just like if i open my text chain and it's dur's just being like end of an era i'm like

oh crap what did adam frazier do i'm actually often the furthest behind if i'm trying to watch the game because again i i'll just admit it i'm watching uh he admitted i'll i'll uh find these oh my god he admitted slightly let's say gray market streams online where you can find it

i like the idea that these are these are sports streams you they're not potable you can't really drink them but you could use them to water your plants and other things are really gray market

here i want to try something here okay okay hi i'm chris mad dog russo juan soto's on the market and many teams are interested where might the young slugger end up and what does this mean for the future of baseball listen to me chris mad dog russo coming up on satellite radio you want baseball the doggies got you covered i might oh shit i forgot the catchphrase it might have i

actually think i added too much energy to even make that joke work well that's me classic andrew

too much energy did you did you just did you just wing that robin williams style well i've been

thinking about it for the past like 60 seconds while you were with your one soda that was very

good that was very composed i thought maybe you were on a website reading something off of like mlb.com that was good you could host sports radio well the problem is i have no idea what you said

the last 60 seconds before i did that so worked out i was like writing that copy in my head

anyway yeah so i think um not that this was uh look you did it andrew you got us on a delightful meaningless tangent and i did it without stalling operation mayo and i did it without anything to say this is great um but my guess would be that of all the formats that i could throw you into well i mean you tell me i feel like sports radio i think you'd be a great sports radio host but i think it would cause you the most anxiety the names of the possible format i would lock up so

fast i mean even on this show i sometimes i forget your name you know like we we joke about like my inability to grasp uh or you know to remember somebody's name in the in the moment when it's needed and like i get in my head about it and like everything just locks up and like can you imagine me doing that with sports like i've been following sports for i don't know 10 years now like so i don't even have a deep historical bench and then also just to have like all these names and and uh you know just i'm not really figures but just like names and facts at the and just to like bro down i'd never be able to do it i wouldn't last the thing is like a segment i just feel like you i

mean certainly with baseball now you consume a lot of baseball you know much more about the current state of the mlb than i do um and same with football you know be pre pre d uh pd pre dashawn you knew a lot about you know the browns and you were listening to a lot of um was it tony sirico or who's the guy oh oh tony rizzo i think tony rizzo um like i feel like you actually have a pretty as far as current sports go as far as those two sports i think you have a pretty deep amount of knowledge but you also have a deep amount of self-doubt like i feel like it hits you in a weird way because we'll be when we do the no point conversion we'll be talking and i feel like it's just you're you're actually making really good points i think you really understand a lot about the sport but i think you don't give yourself enough credit and i think if you were hosting a sports talk show it would be a lot of opportunities for you to be mean to my friend andrew even though interestingly enough i think you would do a good job hosting the show you know

what i made a mistake there already tony rizzo is a guy who covers the browns but we're thinking of um tony grossy who's the guy who yells all the time although how come i can't find any tony grossy in my drops folder luke see i'm already failing you just mentioned me doing sports radio

i'm already losing well he was the guy wouldn't you would he do the post game show yes well he

would like i would listen to his show he's like kind of like the he's kind of like the mad dog russo of cleveland like he's always pounding the desk doggy's got you covered he's like you know I'm looking for why can't I find the drops like I know we suck I know we suck like I was listening to him like throughout here is this one here

God bless America I've had it I've had it with sucking

because keep in mind I was listening like the Browns have been you know at least the conversation has changed in the past few years as they as they got some talent and won some games and even went to the playoffs but like I was listening to Tony Grossi during the just worst period like during a winless season which is where i think stuff like this came from and by the way the reason i couldn't am i messing am i messing this up is it grossy yeah grossy is the radio host but i think i literally marked this guy's name as the i can't tell maybe it's rizzo i'm just busy

seeing if i can find if i can actually find that promo from mad dog because now i want to like yeah i want to put my evil inside all of the listeners but there is just absolutely no there's not even a black market for forget about gray market there is no market for someone collecting up serious xm sports promos that are airing on other things like that thing is never going to be unless i just sit there and record today's mariners game from serious xm on my laptop and roll on the whole thing and wait till it comes up that's the only way i'll get it that's what i've done it's so hard

to get these commercials and so when i talk about them on the other podcast i do record full mariners games like once a year and then I edit out the commercials. Oh, that's your most popular show, right? Yeah, exactly. By the way, I totally messed it up again. It's Rizzo who's the one who...

That is the loserest of all loser moves I've ever heard in my life. My God, man. Have some pride in yourself. I have so many of these things.

But it is Tony Rizzo. I was right the first time. Grossi is a journalist. Anyway, there you go. That's...

man are you gonna miss that you're gonna miss taking a no oh i have a quick question for you and then we need to move on the problem is the coffee's getting cold andrew and that's going to skew the experiment i'm still going to do the experiment but that's going to mess the data up

so i suddenly got into my dreams yet are you kidding me you're never if deshaun watson

there the rumors are and for folks that don't know uh andrew's a big cleveland browns fan but they have traded for a quarterback who's accused of doing very despicable things um sexual assault specifically to women and that was something that was really disappointing to people with what do you call it a conscience yeah and so Andrew has forsworn that team until they get rid of Deshaun Watson now if he's suspended and probably

the ownership honestly even if but anyway yeah I assume that when they signed him I assumed he would be missing half the season at least eight games

and that seems to be what the word on the street is but my question is can you watch the eight games will you allow yourself to watch the games when he's not playing

No, like, no, I think you misunderstand. Like, I am actively rooting against the Browns. I'm not, like, just mad at him. I'm mad at, I mean, yes, he is the one who committed the crimes, although I guess technically they're not crimes because the grand jury didn't. Okay, we don't have to get into that. But he's a terrible human being. But the Browns are the people who totally sold out and signed him and signed him for more guaranteed money than any other player in history because they knew he would be suspended and because they knew. basically the browns paid his legal bills so that he could settle out of court with 20 women out of like the 24 who've who've come forward 24 like i'm not i'm not a browns fan i root against the browns actively now i hope that they sit in what they've done that's i mean that's i believe the

appropriate response it's just it's you know it it makes me feel sad for you that you now have to hate the team that you that you that you loved so much and it's not funny i'm not trying to laugh i

I hope they have a winless season. I don't usually root for injury, but I hope a certain part of his body just falls off on the field.

There would be some real karmic justice there. By the way, nobody asked about this, but everyone set your gag reflexes on sensitive. Speaking of that region of the body, Bubbles' new favorite thing is if I'm sitting on the couch in shorts to just tag me right there. Oh, no. Just like bro? Just like punch you? just like nut tap but with her talon out and she has actually nailed me in that sensitive area a few times with her talon and i'm like this feels personal at this point yeah maybe stop wearing

shorts or just is it bubs maybe wear a cup that would be an interesting i may have to just around the house did you wear a cup when you played high school football i think i mean i definitely wore one at some point during sports it was probably football i almost wondered yeah because little league we wouldn't have worn it and i didn't play baseball i only played baseball in little league so yeah it must have been football and i guess you wouldn't wear it in soccer yeah so i guess

football i feel like it was a big deal i don't know do kids still wear those but when i was playing sports it was a huge deal you had to wear a cup and we had a coach um when i played football who i think i've told the story years ago but he was it was this kid there was a really good kid named nick on our team this was nick's dad and he wasn't really the official coach but he was kind of like a very active parent slash kind of assistant coach like he would come to practices and he would give us you know pep talks and things but he would always show up like after work it'd be like four in the afternoon and he'd be in his like jeans and like a collared shirt and he would be wearing a cup and he would be constantly fidgeting with the cup like a nervous habit that he didn't realize he would do this thing where he would kind of like he would bend his knees like to readjust basically and pull and tug on his cup that he was wearing under his jeans yeah yeah for to watch us play football it was the weirdest thing it's a good point like so

he's not even mixing it up he's not holding no he's not in uniform he just got done from his job

at like auto auto parts store or something but he would fully strap up with a cup it was a sympathy cup it was is that a show title sympathy cup all right andrew speaking of it's time to do this do you need to leave should i put on the i mean we're 25 minutes in i mean don't you think we

just like take a break get to top stories today you don't have to listen to this if you don't

want to andrew i'm being totally serious if this is going to make you feel ill uh you certainly are under no obligation to be around for this but for the listeners who care i've got my coffee cup here i've got this mayo it's brand new i just opened it so we know it's um you know hasn't turned or anything i'm going to i'm adding the mayo to the coffee oh god oh god Oh, God.

Andrew, if I took a photo of this, you would literally start retching. I'm just going to block you on the internet right now.

It's so upsetting. First of all, I expected the mayo to disperse, but it is not dispersing.

It's just a glob. It's a floating glob.

It's just like white worms because it's like a squeeze bottle. It's just like, okay, we're stirring now.

But like you said also, that coffee should have been hotter for this.

Well, I blame you and your tangents. Oh, my God. Okay, now this is going from bad to blurst. First of all, the mayo will not integrate into the coffee. It's just like a little curds.

Well, that's what I was wondering about yesterday as we were talking about it with the football player. I was like, it doesn't seem like it would dissolve right.

Well, again, we didn't get a great look at the kid from Kentucky. All right, I'm just going to – oh, dear God. No, this makes no sense. There's no way he did this. Nobody wants you to do this.

Nobody wants you to do this. Down the hatch. I thought you just said no. I thought you talked yourself out of it.

Oh, God. That's just... It tastes exactly like you'd think it would taste. It tastes like mayo in your coffee. God damn it. There's no, like... Oh.

That's rancid. Do you have water?

Do you have some water?

I do have some water. Drink the water, please, for all of us.

Oh, God. I've also got regular coffee I've got non-mayonased coffee

Can you get that? During the break I want you to Remove that mayonnaise cup out of there I can't do the show knowing that that thing is Sitting there next to you

You don't want to be talking to somebody who has That cup, Andrew, again I'm not trying to mess with you here But I am very confident That if you looked at what I just Consumed, you would You would retch, because I almost did And I don't even, that's not even my move It's so foul Yeah, it has zero redeeming qualities. And it makes me think that this was a stunt maybe to try to, like, get more attention for this quarterback from Kentucky. Maybe, you know, he's once he figures a any because, you know, Kentucky is not a particularly notable football school. They're, of course, known for their basketball. Maybe this is is this just like a stick? Is this just a way for him to draw some more attention to the program and himself so that he can, you know, go higher in the draft?

Because it doesn't seem like it doesn't seem natural to me. Like some people have weird like flavor combos that they like or something. But like that thing, it would have it would have to happen organically. Like I'm sitting at a coffee shop and there's something that doesn't usually go in coffee sitting on the table next to me. So I'll put in there like if it was syrup, if it's like, OK, well, because you go to Denny's or IHOP or whatever, you're messing around. You're like, OK, well, what if I put a little bit of this, this honey or I'm sorry, syrup into my coffee? Oh, OK, it kind of tastes good. it becomes a thing then when you're in the coffee shop but like you're it's so rare that you're enjoying a hot cup of coffee and there's a bottle of mayonnaise there like this has to be like this

seems like an affectation at best yeah and it's again it's like how did the sec because where the kid made the video he's clearly at like the probably it was like media day for the conference right so i don't know where they all meet up but he's in some fairly formalized setting he's got a suit on and it's like they've given him a cup of coffee and some mayo to show them what he does but it's like how did they find out that he does this how regular an activity is this it feels stunty to me because there's just nobody that would taste what i just tasted andrew and think

let's do that again my biggest regret out of this whole thing is that we just used up the title mayo culpa because i sort of feel like it would be even better today on this topic or was that unrelated it was when i made um i i went on this show and i was very as dan lebitard would say loud wrong about the new menu shakeups at subway and then i did some boots on the ground reporting if you'll recall some shoe leather reporting maybe is the phrase i'm looking for uh meaning that i ordered a sandwich of my own the next day and then reported back on it and there was a lot of condiments talk and mayonnaise came up and so we named the show mayo culpa no regrets there other than i really wish we still had that in our quiver i have to tell you something andrew this

may have turned me off to mayonnaise for a while good like that's how bad that was yeah like like

let me ask you this in all seriousness okay because i don't like mayonnaise and i will never eat like um anything that is like heavily mayonnaise based right like a a creamy eggs egg salad has a lot of mayonnaise in it right or all the stuff that people bring to barbecues that i don't touch anything like that um so i don't really know what mayonnaise tastes like every now and then if it comes on a sandwich especially if it's like you know at tubs it's like garlic mayo or some you know it's some sort of a um a flavor infused thing and it's just one of many tastes I'm experiencing.

one moment i've never just had something that is very heavy mayo based what does mayo taste like on its own is it vinegary like camaro kev says well i'm gonna taste just i'm tasting the mayo

i like mayonnaise generally okay super gross okay this by the way i don't actually like this organic mayo from whole foods like this again you wouldn't know this because you you generally avoid it but different kind of mayonnaises of course have slightly different flavors to them and i have just realized i think what made this extra bad for me is i don't really like the way that this whole foods organic mayo comes together from a flavor profile but

the toms of maine of mayonnaise exactly the toms a little bit mayonnaise how about that okay

toms of mayonnaise try that i think that's good um it's tangy because there is some vinegar in it and then it's kind of creamy tangy and creamy now the ingredients are organic uh expeller pressed canola oil organic cage-free whole eggs filtered water uh cage-free yolks distilled vinegar sea salt mustard um like four different kinds of mustard and then lemon juice so that you get a little hit at first of tang which is kind of like tanginess which is the lemon juice and the mustard and then it's kind of creamy in the middle which is probably the oil and i guess the egg

so that's what mayonnaise tastes like do you think there's anybody in the world who knows how to spell mayonnaise properly on the first try is even like the people who make it don't really know right no because i just tried it four different ways before the computer finally just

Now, in fairness, you have had one of the more limited interactions with the product or anybody in a developed country. So you would be especially bad at spelling it.

But I guess I was giving it two S's. Really, it's two N's. One Y, of course. More than one Y in any word is superfluous, I would say.

Yeah. Anyway, so I just did that so none of you listeners have to. Mayo in the coffee. Would not recommend. Okay. Nobody do that. Not good. I did, by the way, end up going to Subway yesterday for dinner. Did you? Well, I was driving up to the other house. By the way, I found out that I may have missed my calling as a graffiti artist, Andrew. Okay, I'm listening. I had to paint something. First of all, it is very hard to buy spray paint in Portland. It's all locked up in a big cabinet.

Like the first time I went to buy shaving cream and the woman's like, what are you getting up to? And I'm like, I'm really going to try to shave my face. He's like, yeah, sure.

Yeah, this was it's all in a locked a locked cabinet. And I had to, like, get the guy to come over and, you know, like, let me get some Rust-Oleum, you know, fluorescent paint. I had to paint on the side of the garage for the PUD. They need to measure from the electrical pole to where I want the new. I'm going to have an extra meter put in like electrical meter so that I can have power out there. and they needed me to go mark on the garage where I want that thing to be so they can have an accurate measurement. So I had to drive out there, and I spray-painted it. And I have to tell you, it was pretty symmetrical. I don't think I've used spray-paint, I don't know, 25 years. And I didn't hate the outcome. As I said to Becca, watch out, Banksy.

Yeah. I was a pretty good— No, really, Banksy, watch out.

I'll send you a picture of this, Andrew, in case you— To be honest with you, this looks like... I'm going to send you a picture. Now, ignore the one I sent that says trigger warning because that's the one that's got the mayo. Oh, you already did that?

Okay, I'm just going to delete that right now. I'm not going to open that.

But let's see here. This looks like... The thing that I paint on the side of the garage, it looks like something you might take a picture of as you were walking around Seattle, Andrew. It's actually fairly artful. Now, I've way oversold it. And it's a square with a line running down. And we're not talking about anything complicated, but I still think it was, I thought it turned out better than I expected.

Both your painting and the photo of your painting.

Well, yeah, you know, and the photo was just to send to the guy with the PUD, like, to be like, hey, can you, um. Oh, I see. Okay, yeah. Oh, I like that. Yeah, that is, that is, that is a fun kind of painting. But the sun, you can just kind of like a cool, like, like light flare going on.

Yeah, burst.

It's all, yeah, it's like, you know, I was, again, I was like, this is vaguely artful. You know what it looks like?

It looks like a scene in Amazing Stories where you're a little kid who just really wants to play basketball, but your family can't afford a basketball hoop. But you find an old can of spray paint in the basement and you just spray paint it on the side of the house. And it looks like a basketball pole.

with a square backboard up there.

But it's going to turn into...

But it's going to turn into a real basketball hoop, and you're going to have... An NBA player will wander up. Exactly. And the next thing you know, you'll have a whole bunch of friends who are playing... I don't know, imaginary magical friends who play basketball with you.

I'm out there just playing day in and day out, shooting the ball against this painted... Yes, yes. ...kind of trompe l'oeil thing, and then one day somebody says, I got next. Yes. Turn around, and it's Larry Bird. You know what it is?

It's Field of Dreams meets the Looney Tunes movie Space Jam meets The Last Starfighter.

Oh, God, I would watch that movie. God, so would I. Now I'm hungry for that movie. I'm having that movie for dinner, too. All right. Let's take a break. I'm going to clear all of the mayonnaise out of the broadcast center, and then we'll come back with more TV chill in a moment. All right, let's thank some donors of the day. These folks are making this episode possible with their generosity. We sure do appreciate folks like Ken Ney in Ypsilanti, Michigan. What up, Ken? Nice to see your name on the list. I could. Love to see. That's the energy. God, I love your Mad Dog impression. Anna Anafi is in Seattle, Washington. Hey, Anna. Thank you.

Greenwood neighborhood, I believe.

Oh, yeah.

Am I allowed to out Anna like that? You said Greenwood? You know what? I take that back. I believe Green Lake area. She often writes into the show. I think Green Lake.

Green Lake, my old stomps. Although I feel like when I'm talking about Seattle with folks and they say, where'd you grow up and I say Green Lake, it can be very misleading because Green Lake is a lovely bucolic neighborhood, but I grew up in the least bucolic part of it on Aurora.

Oh, right. Okay. That is funny because when you say that, I do picture like, you know, the nice where all the cute, expensive, now very expensive houses are. But yeah, right.

Like Green Lake Way, all those really cool houses that look out on the lake or, you know, and neighborhoods like Tangletown or other places. I mean, it's just if I were to live in Seattle, that would be where I would want to live. Not that I could afford that anymore. But we rented a two-bedroom house One house off of Aurora And you had to pay by the hour Am I right about that? Wasn't that in your lease? But the cool thing was The beds, they had a thing You could put a quarter in And they would vibrate

Right, exactly

So that was kind of fun for us as kids Catherine Healy is in Minneapolis, Minnesota Hey, Catherine, thank you Heidi Reynolds In Farmington, Minnesota Latin correspondent Our Latin correspondent

Stay tuned Yeah, she submitted a Latin phrase quiz for the TBTL Summer Games that will be coming out soon.

With elements of Harry Potter. Indeed. I know we've got some Potterheads out there, so look forward to that. Also, Carrie Bouchard is in Fort Worth, Texas. Thanks, Carrie. And then Sarah Geraton Wilcox is in Tacoma, Washington. Thank you, Sarah. Thanks to all of our donors for making the show possible. Couldn't do it without you. Hello and welcome to Top Story. So the race for the Senate in Pennsylvania is heating up. You have the lieutenant governor, a guy named John Fetterman, the current lieutenant governor, he's a Democrat, running against Mehmet Oz, who is running as the Republican. Now, the thing is, of course, Mehmet Oz, Dr. Oz, is an extremely rich celebrity doctor I believe he's actually a heart surgeon, which I will give him this much That sounds like something that takes a lot of schooling and would be hard Unlike Dr. Phil, who I think has his doctorate in counseling from East Texas University Peace and love to folks in Texas But like Mehmet Oz obviously at some point did some real study and understands elements of the human body. He also sells all kinds of quackery and snake oils and supplements and things that have been proven to absolutely not help with anything. And he is kind of a MAGA dude now. And he also lives in New Jersey most of the time. So he's sort of seen by Fetterman and his team as being very carpet baggy. In fact, like one of the things that Fetterman's Twitter roasted Mehmet Oz for was that he recorded his announcement that he was running for Senate in Pennsylvania. He recorded it in his New Jersey mansion, which then the Fetterman team went and found. like a People magazine interview with Dr. Oz and his wife where they're in the same house in New Jersey where he's recording his announcement that he's running for Senate in a totally different state. So that's how they're trying to get Mehmet Oz. Also, but then whoever is doing Dr. Oz's Twitter is just trying constantly to roast this guy, John Fetterman. Fetterman, by the way, is a pretty interesting character in politics.

Have you followed this race very much? No more than what has already been said. So I don't really know Fetterman's background.

He is he's like I said, he's the lieutenant governor. He was the mayor of a town. And I think it's Braddock, Pennsylvania, maybe, which was a town that was, you know, certainly experiencing a lot of poverty and kind of I think sort of one of those small industrial towns where the industry kind of left. and it's a pretty challenging place to manage and he was seen as being really hands-on and just kind of being you know sort of out there with the people of the town uh and then as lieutenant governor he's also i think made some fans with his sort of particular approach to politics he's a little hard to pin down he's a democrat but on certain things he sort of skews a little bit more i don't know you might say centrist but he's also very uh left on certain issues he wants to abolish the filibuster he wants to legalize cannabis there he just wears a hoodie all the time he's like six six and just basically goes around campaigning in a hoodie like he does not look he looks like a guy who you went to high school with who was good at football but it didn't come together and now he's just still living in that town where you used to live like which i don't mean that as a as a as an insult it just does not look quote unquote the part but i think that's people really like about him the people who are his fans but anyway he did have a um uh like a cardiac event i think he had a stroke and he's been on the mend from that but the people love him so much that that didn't even affect his popularity he's beating dr oz by like 10 points right now um and uh anyway so all of that is to say every time dr oz's twitter team tries to do some roast of the fetterman campaign they seem to just kind of self-own like they're trying to Point out they're trying to paint The picture for people that john Fetterman is a bernie sanders Wannabe and so they Put together this like incredibly I think they actually just retweeted this Like incredibly bad Photoshopped deal Of john fetterman's i think It might even be is it maybe a still from step Brothers or something like Is that what are they oh i didn't quite Pick that up it's like An awkward family photo where you've got these two people that are kind of awkwardly close these two they look like male bodies but then of course they badly photoshopped Fetterman's head on one and Bernie Sanders that's what it is yes so it's

so actually though you know I'm trying to rethink this one because I mean the thing is it's such a thing about voting for Dr. Oz I am I'm thinking about moving to Pennsylvania so I can uh vote for him the same way he moved there so that he can run um like well you maybe I'm sorry Luke you finish the premise of this thing and then i'll tell you my journey well the thing the so the

dr oz campaign tweets out this like incredibly janky photo shop deal and then the fetterman campaign just replies with that meme of graphic design is my passion yeah and it's just in like the world's worst font with like a terrible clip art kitty yeah and like it just completely points out the absurdity of what the dr oz i mean just how like again how janky the thing that the dr oz campaign was tweeting out they're also well what do you want to jump in and say like because

i i nothing makes me laugh harder a few things make me laugh harder than i guess the joke you told me on the show yesterday um and then i'll still i am still cruising off of that self-esteem boost it's rare that i make you genuinely laugh but the graphic design is my passion uh like response meme is just so hilarious every time like you see it even if you know it's coming it just is it punches you in the gut it's so funny yes but I will say that they're responding to this best friends terrible photoshop meme that I kind of didn't even realize was a spoof on the stepbrothers movie poster and the movie poster itself is like you know it's um John C. Reilly and um Will Ferrell in front of one of those like cheesy blue backgrounds like you'd have on family picture day so my point of this is they're making fun of the terrible graphic design of this you know Oz campaign tweet but I think the tweet itself is knowingly janky what we might call a what is my word for janky meme that I could for the longest time I couldn't even a dank meme like it's like a dank meme you know like that's the whole point of it yes like it says best friends in a terrible font and the Photoshop is not good. But I think... that whoever made this knew it it was like it was internet savvy whoever originally made it because i don't think that dr oz's campaign created it so probably the person who put it together is some shit poster who was in on the joke to some degree but what i would say is following or looking at memet oz's the rest of the tweets from the campaign uh-huh they're just like so bad and terrible like i think it was on some level slightly meta joke but i think that was lost on whoever is posting i can see that sure this stuff for dr oz if that makes any sense yeah the other thing that's kind of funny is uh and and the fetterman campaign i believe or somebody else was tweeting back at dr oz there's footage of bernie sanders on the dr oz show playing basketball with him like if you're trying to make the point that fetterman and bernie sanders are are thick as thieves maybe maybe don't pick the person who you're cutting it up with on your tv show and there's like an hour of footage of that how did that happen that's the first time i've

ever been tempted to watch the dr oz show i want to watch him play basketball against bernie

um i don't know what the context was um it was it must have been at a time when dr oz was you know probably still he had not shown his true colors yet i guess but i mean so here's another one that he tried to send out uh the dr oz account it's the two spider-mans pointing at each other okay And it's one of them says Bernie Sanders and the filibuster. And then the other Spider-Man that's pointing at the first Spider-Man is John Fetterman. I'd vote to scrap the filibuster now. And then the tweet is even they can't tell themselves apart, trying to say that Bernie Sanders is one of the Spider-Man. John Fetterman is the other. Now, look, I don't know. They have a lot of people that they're paying a lot of money to to really like kind of pull people and try to figure out the issues they care about. Do you think the average Pennsylvanian cares deeply about ending the filibuster and that if they hear that John Fetterman is potentially aligned with Bernie Sanders, that will count against him? That just seems like such, I mean, it's an extremely important issue, but it doesn't seem like it's top of mind when someone is trying to put $5 of gas in their car.

And also just from a meme perspective, I just don't, I haven't seen it. i'm only i'm only hearing you describe the spider-man one but i don't feel like that's how that i don't feel like that's how that works that's not and every time it just seems like

every time this memet oz twitter account tries to do something so he um he's like he takes a picture what you know famously in philly of pat and gino's those are these two cheesesteak stands that are close to each other and the whole thing is are you a pat's guy or a gino's guy or whatever I'm personally a black bird guy I think that's what it was called I had a I know this sounds ridiculous But I had a vegan cheesesteak in Philly Last time I was there That was so flipping good I like had no need to go back To eating a regular cheesesteak But anyway So Dr. Oz like tweets a picture with him Standing I think with one of the people Saying and the tweet is One of the people who runs One of these cheesesteak stands And of course he's like I think holding a cheesesteak He's just doing the corniest thing ever And his tweet is like saying that basically John Fetterman's policies are going to kill small businesses like Pat and Geno's. And then you have Pat from Pat's Subs or whatever, Stakes, saying, do you tweeting back to him, do you even live in Pennsylvania? And can you spell the town you live in? Crying emoji. So Pat from Pat and Geno's is like roasting Dr. Oz because another thing he did was in the press release announcing his campaign, he misspelled the town in Pennsylvania where he allegedly lives.

Yes, right. Exactly. I mean, what what tells on you more than that? Like, no, no, no, I'm a local. I'm a local. Then you misspell the town that you supposedly are from. Yeah, I can spell Valley City, Luke. I won't, but I can. It's like two N's, two S's and a Y. I don't know.

um even the other thing that they did was they got snooki from jersey shore who i have to say uh i think her real name is like nicole politi maybe anyway um everybody knows snooki from uh oh nicole laval sorry that's snooki's real name i have to say like for for how kind of trashy appearing the people from jersey shore were you know when that show was at its height most of them seem like they're actually well um a couple of them got kind of weird with like a business that they embezzled i think one of them had to go to jail but some of them actually seem like pretty sweet like uh this one snooki it's just like a mom now and you know kind of still cruising off of her jersey shore money and celebrity and i don't know it just seems likable to me like they didn't just become trash people as adults you know what i mean like as as they grew up like kind of they seem to sort of mellow out like i used to watch some show with carrie That had Pauly D on it And he was a tremendously likable person Considering how kind of of ridiculous appearing he is um it seems like the jersey short kids were maybe a little more in on the joke than we realized and they were kind of playing it up knowing yeah sort of like chris mad dog russo pretending to be high energy anyway this is i mean this to me puts uh snooki on the right side of this issue she obviously she's like pro john fetterman uh or at least maybe i don't

know maybe they just paid her is this a cameo it is definitely a cameo but i think i'm giving her too much credit it's definitely a cameo so the campaign paid for this are you going to play the audio from your side okay yeah the campaign definitely paid for this via cameo but she also nails it and is loving it like this is this is like her dunk you know as somebody who's

famously from jersey speaking to mimet yeah yeah hey may matt this is nicole snooki um and i'm from jersey shore i don't know if you've seen of it before um but i'm a hot mess on a reality show

basically and i enjoy life uh by the way i love that me too i really like i like that as just a mantra that could be my next tattoo i'm a hot mess on reality tv and i enjoy life yeah she knows what she's doing i love that i think that's a very nice catch-all like look i enjoy life okay so there's going to be some elements of it that probably don't work for other people i'm out

here enjoying i'm snooky i'm out here enjoying my life but i heard that you moved from new jersey to Pennsylvania to look for a new job and personally I don't know why anyone would want to leave Jersey because it's like the best place ever and we're all hot messes but I want to say best of luck to you I know you're away from home and you're in a new place but Jersey will not forget you I just want to let you know I will not forget you and don't worry because you'll be back home in Jersey soon this is only temporary so good luck you got this and Jersey loves you

that's a pretty good pretty good burn like that's a pretty good trolling honestly whoever thought that up at the fetterman campaign it's got 3.2 million views i mean that's like better than one of those stupid you know memet oz wrong for pennsylvania wrong for the same you know like those real kind of serious voice ads that they're i'm sure just i'm sure if you turn on a television in pennsylvania right now all you're seeing are those kinds of attack ads this seems actually

much more effective to me yeah and probably reaching you know a different demographic as well like i'm sure that like you say all those probably more serious ads are running on local television that like look more at the issues on both sides you know going back and forth but like definitely leveraging this has got to be i i actually was not sure what the state of that race is i was glad to hear that when you just mentioned that fetterman is um leading in the polls that uh that makes me feel good because i had no idea all i knew is oz has such name recognition and i knew that he won the primary so i thought it was kind of a fait accompli he barely

won the primary it was like one of those things where it was like 20 votes or something so he and he's raised far less money than fetterman has which is kind of nice and in i just am constantly scanning the horizon for any evidence of the diminishing of donald trump's influence whether real or perceived like sometimes the only way i can get to sleep at night is just well a literally dreaming of physically beating donald trump up i still do that every single night but just anytime i hear something that makes me think possibly that we may not have to deal with him as a president again i get a little like hit of serotonin or something but um there's like all this basically dr oz used to have like 80 something mentions of donald trump on his like twitter and website like he was just running tightly with trump and now there are no mentions of donald trump on dr oz's website oh really there's like a banner that drops down or something but like i was reading a political reporter in pennsylvania who was citing this that basically he scrubbed his page of donald trump references interest which is interesting because it clearly means that they studied it and they realized that that was dragging him down for some reason um so that's also weirdly encouraging just like any any time that someone has to jettison donald trump from their conversation Did you see, I mean I don't want to give this guy Trump that is Any extra oxygen But did you happen to see those outtakes From his video that he released After January 6th

No Is this coming out in the hearings Or is this something that They released it last night No I haven't watched it Are you going to play it now I don't want to play him on this show It gives me the ick

That the young people say But it's It's pretty remarkable because he's talking to whatever staffer is running the teleprompter and speechwriter is there with him, and he – you just can tell that he is – to me – so basically he's recording this video that they're forcing him to record. Basically saying, like, you should not have broken the law on January 6th and the election is over and Congress has ruled on it. Basically, it was supposed to be him being like, OK, I give up, but he won't do it. He's like stops and he's like, I won't I don't want to say that. I don't want to say that the election is over. I'm not going to say the election is over. So they take that out of the script. And then he can't say the word yesterday. He has them take the word yesterday out of the script because yesterday does that. It's just not it's not working for me. He can't say the word yesterday. Maybe he can only sing it

Maybe he can only sing it by Paul McCartney

He porky pigs it so much that he just ends up having them take it out of the script Wow It's really weird that there's not more And by the way, I want to just say a huge Just a flying double bird to Mark Burnett The producer of Survivor and The Apprentice Just a real massive human piece of trash Because A, he basically got Donald Trump elected By giving him that platform of The Apprentice Which is gross to me And also there must be so much footage So many outtakes from that show That would be so telling And I don't know why Mark Burnett will not release the Snyder Cut I would like him to But I guess my point is It's rare that you see Trump this unguarded Because he's always in A mode Where he is assuming he's being Observed and he is assuming that I mean again He's so off the cuff and he's such a Ranter and tangent goer honor It's not like he's composed when he thinks people are paying attention to him, but there's something that feels uniquely unguarded about this particular like minute and a half video.

It sounds real cringy. I mean, seeing any outtake sort of has a can have a cringy element. You know what I mean? You and I were talking about this recently, too. In fact, we were recording some summer games and we had a we had a friend of the show on and it was somebody who hadn't been on before. Somebody who's been listening for a long time. And well, I'll just say it was it was Kirk. our listener kirk honda is going to join us on the summer games and we already recorded that one and he was mentioning that um like kind of hearing us it was a little bit surreal for him he was on the phone you and i are doing you're in portland i'm up here um and so we're all you know connected via technology and um he said it was interesting to kind of hear even though we don't talk that much during the breaks or whatever that the tone will change a little bit right like you and i and you and i are both like mortified if something is left in a show that was supposed to be cut out even if even if it's the most harmless thing in the world because we do just we're just unguarded and you can just hear in somebody's voice who their audience is right and there's something that is so panicky and cringy about or potentially panicking and cringy about any kind of outtake

yes absolutely this one seems the reason that this one was so notable to me was because it just clearly lays out i mean i guess it's not it's not anything we didn't already know but it's just weird to see him in an unguarded moment refusing to state for the record that the election was over like this is again this is post january 6th and he also you can tell that he doesn't want to be critical of the rioters because he basically they have written this thing that's a decent mayo culpa which is the new way we always say it on the show now his his staffers i just sort of imagine him just like mad king style which is just like one person left in the white house on january 7th who hasn't like who has everyone else has quit and it's just like trump and just like the lady who used to work the front desk yeah it's just the two of them i mean she's like he's like do you know how to operate the camera and she's like trying to turn it on she doesn't know how to do the teleprompter it's just like feels just like total disarray there but um uh yeah it was just interesting because they had written a speech that would have actually said what you should have said which was the election is over it's been certified by congress if you uh broke the law you will be prosecuted like it was it was what he needed to say and to see him like a petulant child want to resect out lines that he doesn't want to say it's just it's it's just a view into what we all know about him which is that he is just a child trapped in a 75 year old guy's body

like when marty d'amico had to write an apology note for bullying me in the back of the bus on a field trip he didn't want to write that note uh what do you do you have that note as well i do do not have any copy of that note but it's a true story do you remember anything about what the note said i think it was pretty boilerplate child being forced to apologize to another child for misbehaving at the other child's expense i don't remember any dazzling details of it just that i you know didn't really believe it it didn't it's so funny that we make kids do this because maybe it's the right thing to do but like me as the kid who in this in this case was pinned down and had poison ivy rubbed all over him um the letter didn't ring like it didn't bring any healing to my life you know what i mean like i didn't want exactly it's just like you don't want

all you don't want all the adults involved like it's humiliating enough you know right I wonder if Tony D'Amico is on cameo and if I can hire him Marty Marty D'Amico yeah um yeah you're right that is a weird like I understand the impulse as a parent I don't ever remember having to do that with Addie but as a kid I remember that kind of thing where it's like they frog march you down to wherever you know to apologize and as the person apologizing it's not a life lesson like Like, you don't, you know, I did do things and then regret them and feel bad. That was probably more instructive for me. But that was like I had to go on that journey on my own as a kid. Not like I've told this story many times, but like I punched a kid in class once, mostly because I was just curious if this move I saw John Wayne do would work.

Because most things I just wanted to feel alive.

Yeah. And that was really I mean, I feel really bad about it, honestly. and and and but anyway i punched this kid and then it was the weirdest thing i mean we were having words it wasn't like i just randomly sucker punched a guy we were squaring off but it didn't need to go to that level i punched him and then i immediately self-reported to the principal's office like punch the kid walk right out the door right to the principal's office sit outside hi can i help you yeah i just punched him i did a bad bad thing i just did a bad bad thing and then i came back to the class then they were like sent me back to class and then i apologized the class and then i cried in front of the class by the way this is like sophomore year oh wow oh

i pictured it younger no sophomore year of college but like but like that punch happened in high school the apology happened in college and there was one confused professor that's really a long

line outside of the principal's office no but like now that was a moment where i felt true regret Like no one had to tell me Go apologize to Tim Mosby I just felt like a complete asshole And that stuck with me And that's why I only occasionally Headbutt people at bars now Because I learned an important lesson

It's like I saw John Wayne do this headbutt once

I saw the Duke do this headbutt once Yeah exactly I saw a cool move on TikTok I can't imagine it'll ever come in handy for me Because I'll never be Hopefully I'll never be in another fight And also, I can't imagine it would be real crouching tiger, hidden dragon, but there's a move, I guess, if someone tries to kick you and you're holding their leg by the, let's just say you're holding their ankle now, so their leg is straight and extended, you can knee their hamstring, like the underside of their leg, and it is completely debilitating to them. So I guess, Andrew, if you ever find yourself in a fight and someone throws a high kick.

If I ever find myself on a road trip with you, I'm going to be weird.

If you ever find yourself in a fight and someone throws a high kick and you catch their leg, remember to knee them in the hamstring.

Okay, I will. Sounds good. Remember your training, Walsh. Remember your training.

I want to mention that I was right about Nicole's last name. I think her maybe maiden name is Polizzi, but I think her married name is Lavelle. So when I said Snooki Polizzi, Nicole Polizzi, I was not totally wrong. And also she charges $300 for a cameo video. So that's how much that cost the Fetterman campaign.

Yeah, I was going to say, and that's officially in their campaign filings.

All right. How about a little music for your weekend before we get out of here?

All right, you want me to go first? I usually do. Yeah, why not? I think I do. Yeah, I think I do. Sure. I'll go first. So I was listening to, you know, something on Spotify recently. And this song came up in an algorithm. And I thought for sure, I thought for sure this was one of those like bad finger songs that Paul McCartney had written. You know, like, what's that? What's that bad? If you want it. Well, I'm not supposed to sing during the music for your weekend. It's not. You don't want to set off Spotify. It's not. It's not turn off your podcast for the weekend. but anyway but you know that you know that song if you want to go and get it it's just you know it's bad finger but it's like written by paul mccartney and it's produced by the beatles there's

a ton of cross pollination because and wasn't the name bad finger came because the guy had an injured finger the piano player didn't like john lennon give him that nickname oh i that i don't

that i don't know if you've mentioned that i didn't remember that but yeah and again it was like the first single out of the apple studios or whatever so anyway that made sense to me so I'm listening to Spotify and this other song comes up and I have a feeling our listeners probably know a lot more about this fella I'd never heard of him but somebody named Emmett Rhodes pops up do you know who Emmett Rhodes is I don't well before I see that name I assume this is either Paul McCartney or another like heavily Paul McCartney written and influenced song by a bad finger esque band but it's not it's this guy Emmett Rhodes who apparently was called like the one man Beatles for a while but

Also, I think, and this is the only song I've heard so far, but upon reading more about him, I really want to go back and check out his other stuff. He ended up releasing four records, I think three in the late 60s and early 70s that were pretty well received. Then he disappears for decades. He just drops out. I think he got overwhelmed by stuff. I think he was in some sort of a record contract that overwhelmed him. And he just, I think, like, he mentions this in interviews later. He died in 2020, by the way, but he just said, I just dropped out. I couldn't handle it, and I was overwhelmed, and I think he came back in 2010 or something to release one more record, but that's the story, as I know it, of Emmett Rhodes, but I have a lot more reading and listening to do, but check out this song. It's called Somebody Made For Me, and I am just so astounded, and again, I don't know if this is an insult or not, but I'm just so astounded that this is not Paul McCartney.

Somewhere, someone special, just for me. Somewhere, someone special must be. Somewhere, someone special, just for me. Somewhere, someone special must be. Somebody made for me. Somebody made for you. Somebody made for me. Every time you think it sounds as beetle-y as it can be, it gets more beetle-y, right?

But I love it, it's great.

It's so good.

Sometimes this is rude because it sounds like maybe he suffered from some things, and again, he's no longer with us but like when i hear a band that sounds so much like another band i always have a fantasy where i give them a record of the more famous band and say like check this out you're really gonna love it like can you imagine giving this guy like a beatles record or a paul mccartney

record and be like you're gonna love this so much well i mean that's the thing this is gonna sound like i'm being critical and i really don't mean to be because that is such a good song but it's so Beatles-esque, it's almost like, I don't even know how you make that song with a straight face,

and yet at the same time, I'm loving that song. I know, no, me too, I mean, I think that the older I get, the less I worry about whether or not somebody is quote-unquote ripping off somebody else's sound, like, um, I think I cared about that more when I was younger, and now I'm just kind of like, hey, more good music, that's fine, I don't know that, I don't know that that's the right attitude to have, honestly, but it's just kind of where I am, so I'm just kind of like, wow, that that blows me away but i really like the song but yeah it would also be like you know it would also be kind of strange to be making this music that is not just like the songwriting like everything about that the vocals the way it's produced the bridges like it's exactly like a beatles song have you listened to the the rest of the album no i haven't i'm gonna i'm gonna do that i what's his name again emmet rhodes emmet rhodes i'm gonna i'm gonna check that out today because

i mean i love that like honestly that would be a top 20 beatles song for me right if you just played that for me and you're like oh yeah you know i like this was like just like you said this is just some mccartney something from the the the mcu the mccartney concert universe i don't

know the c really hung me up didn't work actually you got closer than i would have the c is for the

small c in mccartney when i'm talking about the mcu yeah but um yeah i would just 100 percent believe that that was literally paul mccartney and if not definitely written by him definitely

written by him yeah exactly but anyway yeah but i am looking forward and again having read about those first three albums i'm definitely interested in hearing more because i don't know if it's all going to be that beatles-esque it sounds like some of it might get maybe a little bit more modern sounding but um yeah looking forward to checking it out all right the song that i would

like to play it's just because i i started i started rapping this on the show the other day And you said you hadn't heard of it And I was like I bet you you have heard this song Now here's the So the song is Hated or Love It by The Game Featuring 50 Cent Yeah, I think I have a radio version here I just love this song It just like, it slaps And mostly I just want to know if you've heard this song before So can we play a little of The Game, Hated or Love It

Yeah Let's take them back Uh-huh Coming up, I was confused, my mommy kissing a girl Confusion occurs, coming up in the cold world Daddy ain't around, probably out committing felonies My favorite rapper used to sing, check, check out my melody I wanna live good, so shit, I sell dope for a full finger ring One of them gold ropes, Nana told me if I pass, I get a sheepskin coat I can move a few packs, I get the hat Now that'd be dope, Torsten

Turned in my sleep that night Woke up the next morning And stole my bike Different day, same shit Nothing good In the hood I run away from this She'll never come back If I could Beat it or love With the underdogs on top And I'm gonna shout And hold me Until my heart stops Go ahead and be me I'm Raps MVP And I ain't going nowhere So you can get to know me Beat it or love With the underdogs on top

We have to let it keep playing Because we gotta get to the game part That was all 50 cents Okay The good part is when the game gets

I'm Raps MVP And I ain't going nowhere So you can get to know me On the grill of my low rider Guns on both sides Ride a butter gold wire As I phone five I'm killing all my soul But really do it That's the true meaning Of a ghost rider 10 G's And take your daughter Out of Air Forces Believe you me homie I know all about lossless I'm from Compton Where the wrong colors Be cautious One phone call I had your body dumped In Marcy I stay strapped like car seats Been banging since my little Rob got killed for his Barclays That's 10 years I told Pooh in 95 I'll kill you if you try me For my Air Max 95s

I knew a kid who had his Barclays stolen when I was in middle school. And, like, stolen off his feet, right? Oh, yeah. That was a real thing. Like, we had to, I had Jordans, and Peter Williams and I were walking around our neighborhood, and a car full of kids pulled over, jumped out, and said, give us your Jordans. And we ran. It was real, like, right out of, like, a Scorsese film or something. We're, like, jumping fences, cutting through backyards because this was the neighborhood that we hung out in. like it was a it was a thing for a minute there in the in the 90s how old were you because that's

funny because you always talk about how you always had the off-brand everything but was i saved up

for these these were my most prized possessions in the world i bought them at nordstrom for 125 dollars and they were i think they were the jordan fives they were the kind of people if we have any sneaker heads out there they were the kind that had like a luminescent like a tongue that was not luminescent but basically it was like made out of the material that they make like reflective road signs out of so if you hit it with light it would kind of it would shimmer anyway those were the shoes that i was wearing and i was not going to get jumped for those shoes that's expensive for

shoes 90 what like 93 dollars or like 1993 era is this um 91 probably okay well in 1993 that would be like the equivalent of like almost 250 bucks today so like oh yeah no i mean it was a big deal

I knew kids, Phil Scoverin, his move was he would buy, because Nordstrom has this incredibly legendarily lax return policy. And Phil Scoverin, who we called Scov Chunks or sometimes the Pinto Pony, he would buy Jordans at Nordstrom, wear them for an entire basketball season, and then return them and get a different pair, which I thought was amazing. I was amazed that they would actually let him do that. anyway uh yeah that was a really big deal for me i mean the thing that's really funny is for all the stuff that i've well i don't have that much stuff for my child but for the various things that i did save the only thing i should have saved were those shoes because i mean granted they were thrashed so they probably wouldn't be worth that much but you know those original jordans sell for like thousands upon thousands of dollars now like i kind of got in a mode for a while where i was like i wanted to see if i can get those shoes again and you know a couple of glasses of wine in getting on like you know ebay or sneaker x or stock x and like i was like i can't i can't afford to buy these shoes like if you want to get a pair that's in decent condition you're looking at like

three thousand bucks or something i've done the similar thing with my um with the stereo that i grew up with i was in fact i i think i've shown you a photo of me on my birthday when i was receiving my my gift of a clarinet 122 realistic brand which was the radio shack brand realistic clarinet 122 was my first uh first stereo it had double cassette uh and a uh it didn't have high speed dubbing but it did have dubbing uh cassette to cassette radio am fm of course and um don't don't scrimp on that fm and a turntable and i love that thing so much and every now and then i'll go online and i'll just look at pictures of like you know people making youtube videos of this device because I could just have such a physical memory of it.

Now I'm looking at... Man, it looks like I can actually get a reproduction of these Jordans for $179.

Wow. Well, that's cheaper in today's dollars than you would have paid in 91.

That's weird. That's like the Jumbo Jack. It should be more expensive now than it was.

Well, but it's a recreation, you said, right? It is. It's like a whole different market now.

There just went my afternoon. Uh-oh. I'm on a retro Nike website just looking at stuff. I'll be taking the rest of the show off, Andrew. Actually, this is kind of cool.

I don't recognize that song, by the way, to answer your question. I don't know that I've heard that before. No, but it's good. It's really good. I like the 50 parts, too. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, really, like, it's...

When I lived in L.A., that song was kind of big on the radio, I think was how I got into it, and then it was a jogging song, and yeah, I'm a fan. Our listener suggestion this week comes from Peter Verdose, who is one of the Verdose brothers who are in the Mount St. Helens Vietnam Band. Now, if you are a long, long-time listener, you will remember that we have had Mount St. Helens Vietnam Band on TBTL a couple of times. back in the radio days i think we had them on maybe they i think they might help us with a live event they're a really interesting um band uh they started out a husband and wife and a young guy named marshall who they had sort of um adopted uh was the drummer so they were kind of a family band and um now marshall's all grown up and uh the band is a little bit of a different um makeup it's just the verdose brothers but um they've got this new song coming out because they're going to be touring again they're going to be playing at um capitol hill block party they're playing at numos and apparently according to peter someone's working on a documentary about uh the the name mount saint helen vietnam band was i believe marshall came up with that when he was like seven or something they're like what do you want to call the band like it really just i think it started off as just like a a way for this family to just kind of like hang out and it was tracy and benjamin and marshall for a way for them just like kick it and do family stuff and then marshall is just like such an amazing natural drummer that uh they started getting gigs and they started playing you know i think they played with the trackenberg family slideshow players they're on that circuit of family bands for a while but anyway they've got a new song uh that they're going to be putting out and peter sent it along to me and of course now i did not actually

have the name of the song in front of me do you have it there andrew no i was gonna say the email i got from you doesn't say the name or nor does it have the link well i mean do i have to hold your hand let me um hold on let me you know what i have to do andrew to log back into the world's least friendly email account you have one key in one hand another key in another hand you have to stretch your arms wide unlock the vault make me do you want me to remember this key yes remember the key oh my god and it's making me remember my password did i remember wow it's probably andrew is cool i well here there is something on spotify they have this thing where it says latest release and so their latest release which just came out is eyes wide shut and that's the song gotta be it okay because it just came out because they've been on hiatus for a long time this is their only new work so this is it that's exactly what it is it's eyes wide shut

from Mount St. Helens Vietnam Band, friends of the show. So take a listen to this.

And did you want to promote that they're appearing at the Capitol Hill Block Party? I just said that.

Oh, you did? Okay, sorry. I was thinking about mayonnaise. No problem. And also Numos. Okay, gotcha. So do check them out. We love them. So that's going to bring us to the end of this broadcast week. Thanks for listening, everyone. We'll be back here on Monday with more Imaginary Radio for you. Until then, have a great Friday. Have a great weekend. Be safe. Take care of yourselves. Go Mariners. And please remember, no mountain too tall.

And good luck to all.

Don't be afraid to disappear The world is better than the eyes shut Eyes shut Gotta get up Gotta go on Gotta go on

god bless america i've had it i've had it with sucking why do we have to put up with this when are we gonna hold these people accountable when when when when power out