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In the year 1621, the Pilgrims held their first Thanksgiving feast. They invited the great Indian chief, Masasoit, who brought 90 of his brave Indians and a great abundance of food. Governor William Bradford and Captain Miles Standish were honored guests. Elder William Brewster, who was a minister, said a prayer that went something like this. We thank God for our homes and our food and our safety in a new land. We thank God for the opportunity to create a new world full of freedom and justice. Amen.

TBTL!

Oh, what a heartwarming Thanksgiving tradition, almost all of which is probably false. But it was a different time. Oh, man, this music puts me in a mood. Hi, everybody. Welcome to a special Thanksgiving Day edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. My name's Luke Burbank. Right over there, who you call in a turkey, is one Andrew Walsh. Hello, my friend.

Hello. This music is the equivalent, this is the audio equivalent of a fire crackling in a fireplace.

do you know that my it's become the default setting on my television when i'm not watching all in with chris hayes is the fireplace channel oh no you mentioned that the other day i'm laughing

because i'm i'm sorry to interrupt you i i'm thinking of a tweet or something i saw on instagram that somebody said i wanted to make it cozy in i think my college classroom so i turned the fireplace channel on all the monitors and it seemed like we were all in hell it looked like the mike florio background wow you remember my most popular tweet from 10 years ago yes um yeah

i i just love it it's just it's amazing how what how powerful the sort of visual suggestion is because of course i don't have a fireplace in this apartment but it really you know it's just kind of flickering in the background and you know i got the heat on so i'm warm and i'm sort of

looking at a fire and i find it very soothing you know we do have a fireplace in this uh house of ours which we haven't used yet i was oh my gosh i don't have time to get into this boy angie's list now just called angie proceed with caution folks i thought it was just a site where you could type in your information and get some phone numbers you could smile and dial but now angie has all of my information and has sent it to all of these fireplace inspection and chimney sweep services and everybody i keep getting phone calls it's so confusing who's calling me and who is with what company angie i believe angie herself is emailing me 20 times a day about chimney stuff i am i will never use that site again would you say you're not thankful for angie hoovering up

your personal information and now trying to sell you i get updates from that stupid website like driveway resurfacing your driveway costs in where the the town where my other little place is yeah because i mistakenly tried to use them to find a contractor and it just ended up being the exact thing you're describing like they will never leave me alone um what are your plans for this

thanksgiving sir nothing too outrageous genevieve has some family in town it's going to be and i think we have a friend who's a who's a kind of a what he describes a Thanksgiving orphan or something here in town Aaron Mason I think a lot of folks know him from I think he's been on the show with me before when you've been out Luke I know that you are not allowed to be in the same room together the court mandated I believe it got ugly there for a while but yeah I think he might be coming over we've spent Thanksgivings with him in the past several years too so that's almost like a little mini tradition so just real real cozy i'm using too many words to say not enough

here so i'll shut up but i mean i what i'm it's let's get down to brass tacks what's the scoop

with the bird the taters all that stuff it's i mean again it's just it's it's what we do almost every year so um genevieve is in charge of the bird she'll get that thing brining in our stock pot tonight and she'll be in charge she's usually in charge of most of the um the food i am usually in charge of two foods, which are the mashed potatoes, which I mash by hand, and then sautéed Brussels sprouts, which is the hardest thing because those things... Are those like attorneys general? You have to say the S in the middle. I find that they're technically called Brussels sprouts, and so for some reason, I feel like it's important to, I don't know, note that. They are called that, no joke, because it must have been by... I've never noticed that before. But that's what they're called, right? I mean, are you looking it up? No, I believe you. I've never thought of that.

Yeah. So anyway, those are, you know, that's not, I think, a super traditional Thanksgiving thing, but we wanted something green. Vives and I don't think usually make a bean like, you know, a green bean casserole or anything like that. So this is something that we like a little bit more. It is that it's one of the trickier things that I have to do out of the two things, because to saute them correctly, you you they all have to be in a single layer on the pan. So you have to use the biggest pan you can find, and probably it'll take, like, kind of two pans worth of these Brussels sprouts. And you also have to serve them pretty immediately off. You can't just, like, let them warm for a while because they'll get really mushy, right? So that's the thing that always causes me maybe the most anxiety. But for the most part, and I told you this move, didn't I? I don't know if I told you this yet. But what I did last year, which I want to make a tradition, is I found old Thanksgiving Day parades on YouTube. I didn't grow up really watching the Thanksgiving Day parade that much. It might have been on in the background, but it wasn't like a huge centerpiece of our holiday tradition. But, you know, midlife crisis, et cetera, et cetera, reliving my childhood. But last year, for some reason, I'm like, I wonder if I can just find the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade for, I don't know, 1985. I think I told you about this afterwards. And it was so great. All three hours with commercials. And, like, the commercials are all for kids' toys or mostly for, like, kids' toys of the era. Like, the parade will feature some He-Man float and then some He-Man choreographed fight or something like that. Oh, cool. And then they go to commercial break. and what are they selling you but he man toys and oh i know it was whatever year the he man movie was coming out too and so it was starring dolph lundgren i think so so it's just kind of a blast from the past i recommend that whatever era you grew up in go go to youtube see if you can find a macy's thanksgiving day parade from your youth and put that on in the background that'll make you warm and fuzzy i'm very

into the macy's day parade of the present it's really my favorite thing about pretty much about the whole holiday is me and Addie sitting on the couch at my parents' house, drinking coffee, and just making fun of every single thing that's happening. So this year, we're going to Zoom and do that. So at least I'm going to get to enjoy that.

Yeah, because you mentioned yesterday that your family, we don't have to retell this story, but it's a bummer. Thanksgiving is your favorite holiday. It's always a time to get together with family, of course. And that's kind of been scratched this year due to illness.

Yeah, although I'll tell you, my mom I said this on yesterday's episode But my mom was not feeling well As were a number of members of my family But my mom lives for Thanksgiving And she was literally like Had a 102 degree fever And was just sort of out of it And so my dad was like She was sleeping all day She was really, really under the weather And my dad kind of said Look, we're going to have to call this And I kind of just imagine my mom waking up and the fever had broken and she was just like what what so now she's like i'm feeling better everyone who wants to come over on friday oh she's trying to like she's trying to coordinate and i don't blame her you know again this is a real high point for her and it was like she got sick she laid down and then by the time she woke up thanksgiving was canceled so i feel pretty bad for her so we're gonna try to do some sort of a makeup thing but but probably not this weekend Because again, I'm never this way, but I'm pampering myself in being very delicate and very avoidant of potentially getting sick because I've got this big thing coming up next week. So anyway, but I am excited to Zoom with my daughter and watch the parade. So that'll be kind of fun. Now, I understand you've got some Thanksgiving Day tips for me because you're obviously kind of the Thanksgiving head in this relationship. and um you've actually i believe you wrote this right you wrote some tips and tricks for winning

thanksgiving is that the name of your article i most certainly did not i came across an article that says you want to i don't have it directly in front of me right now i'll call it up in a second but it said i think it was a new york times wire cutter section and it says if you want to be a thanksgiving hero this year here are the three things that you should bring over to the house where you're having thanksgiving dinner if you're a guest that's not the actual headline i don't know if you could tell those a little bit wordy but that's basically it now listen i don't want to get all negative on this blessed day of thanks but i want to talk about these supposed three things with you that are going to make you a supposed thanksgiving day hero because i have

some notes i want to win thanksgiving yeah i want to win i want to change the way i thanksgiving exactly have you talked about that on after these messages just the absolute the scourge that is um change Change the way you pizza change the way you money like all these things that are not a verb that every company thinks they're being so clever by making into a verb.

I know exactly what you're talking about, but no, we haven't we haven't talked about that. No one out pizzas. The hut is a classic one going way back.

Yeah, and that one I kind of actually sort of begrudgingly respect. It's fun to say it's also fun to contemplate like what would one have to do to actually eat more pizza than they can. like would it be order all the pizza they have would it be to make a pizza the size of their building like i don't know how that would even work but i kind of like that one but the ones that are just like like the one that comes to mind is like change the way you money it's like

the way i money yeah that is that is irritating um but or the idea of winning win your next thanksgiving well that i don't even think of as so much as a commercial thing although they may have adopted it but i just sort of feel like that was in the culture quite a bit like in the vernacular like i don't know over the past five years like how to win thanksgiving how to win this or that that always really turns me off big time like why are you making we're not so and so won the internet no they didn't nobody won nobody's winning the internet everybody calmed down

happy thanksgiving though hey i started it by saying the peanuts kids are basically historically

inaccurate and possibly racist i always forget that they get into so much detail of that story Which I'm in a position to fact check myself right here

I mean those people may have been at that Some of the people they name specifically May have actually been at whatever is considered the first Thanksgiving But I do think those of us with any sense of history Understand that the idea of the native people Sitting down with their sort of beloved white visitors And exchanging I'm feeling like there's more to the story than we were being told in the history books when we were in first grade.

Every year we go to play that and it's always like a little bit of a, you and I didn't talk about it too much this year, but it's like it always does make me cringe a little bit, like not even cringe because of them, but like kind of cringing at my own childhood and it's like it reminds me of all of the white narrative American savior stuff we were just like, that I was just brought up with, right? And it's like it's a very much a present reminder of that sort of of the education system of the 1980s, of which I'm a of which I'm a product.

But on the other hand, like I said, I don't like the part where Pigpen starts yelling USA, USA.

That's what I'm uncomfortable with. What I thought is the piano playing kid Lionel who does that. I can't remember. Linus. Linus. Right, right. Linus in his blanket. OK, Lionel.

Let's take a quick break, and then we're going to come back and slay all day when we win the way we Thanksgiving in a moment here on TVTL.

Thank you, baby.

Hey, let's thank some of our donors of the day. We are very thankful. We're always thankful for the generous people that are allowing us to do this as our job by donating money. We're especially thankful today for Matthias Wager of Richmond, California. It's up in the Bay Area, I believe, right?

Oh, Bay Area, okay.

The Yask area, I think, generally speaking. Thank you. Oh, and speaking of, thanks also to Priscilla Wu. Hey. Who's in San Francisco.

Priscilla made TBTL related art Yes The No Mountain Too Tall stuff, right? Exactly, yeah Priscilla killing it at the art game Absolutely Winning the art game Changing the way she arts

Change the way you art Change the way you art Thanks, Priscilla Thanks to Susan Copa of Pasadena, California Wow We've got three folks checking in from the Golden State Thanks, Susan And then Ann Minor is in Roslyn, Washington Indeed she is Thanks, Ann We love Roslyn One time we took a sprinter van to Roslyn, Washington, Andrew And narrated the whole thing on the 24-hour show

And some of it was lost to history Because we lost the connection I guess our recordings still worked But our broadcast went out when we went through the pass, right?

Oh, it did? I mean, such a blur such a blur that was you know i forget who it was but somebody recently did a 24-hour marathon and everyone was freaking out and i was like um excuse me we did it earlier and it almost ruined me and andrew's friendship so can we get some credit you know two podcasts claim to have done

that for the first time both lebitard i believe and then prior to that i think um comedy bank

bang so the two main podcasts i listened to claim to have gotten there first when we did it first

but what can you do god so tired of ackerman stealing our genius ideas um thank you ann also thanks to alex parl of edmunds washington home of the whirly ball right that is uh yes yes i think of edmunds as being more like down by the the ferry terminal and kind of i guess you'd call downtown Edmonds and I would think of where the whirly ball it is technically Edmonds but I think of over on Aurora being I don't know what I think of that as Aurora it's its own neighborhood called

Aurora yes it is now that's kind of getting where the and this is important conversation to be having on Thanksgiving that's sort of where the Arby's is as well right the remaining Arby's in Seattle

The remaining Arby's is at 100, I believe, 175th and Aurora by the mall there, kind of kitty corner. And you would go north by maybe a mile or two. You'd pass a Taco Time. You would pass a Safeway where we once bought like seven dozen eggs at 1130 at night to go egg Angie Stamolis's house. What?

How is this all coming out in these two shows we're doing? I thought I knew about all the bad shit you did as a kid. That's terrible.

I remember the person at Safeway Looking at these like Five teenage boys At 11 o'clock at night Buying like 15 boxes of eggs going Are you making a cake And then just after you pass that Safeway You would look to your right And you would see Whirly Ball And you'd see Alex there Just absolutely changing the way They Whirly Ball And winning every time Thanks also to Scott Pringle, who is a Snohomish Snohomie in Snohomish, Washington. Scott, thank you for supporting the program. Hope you're having a lovely Thanksgiving. Hope your family has managed to escape whatever the illness is that seems to be wracking. I've gotten texts from friends of ours who've also had their Thanksgivings decimated by this thing.

Really? I don't know anybody who's gotten that.

But if you're having a Thanksgiving this year and everyone is healthy, you should be very happy because it sounds like you might be kind of in the minority on that one.

Can I just jump in really quickly and just say I was right. The Arby's is in Edmonds. It's actually up at 244th Street. That's the one I'm talking about. Maybe there was another one further south.

No, I guess I was just off on the street. We're thinking of the same one.

It is Edmonds, though, which I'm pretty proud of nailing that. I mean, Edmonds probably is the one. Let me be honest with you, though.

If you said to someone, I'm going to go to the Arby's and Edmonds, no one would know what you were talking about. No one calls that Edmonds, I don't think. What would you call it? You would call it North Seattle? Aurora, the city of Aurora. The city of Aurora, yeah. This is totally my own personal mapping, like my mental map of Seattle. I agree with you that it is Edmonds. I'm not disputing that. I'm just saying I've never thought of that. I think of Edmonds as being kind of like You take a left and you go off of Aurora And you head basically west for a while And then it seems to me like you're in Quote-unquote Edmonds But I'm not disputing the map You are correct That is the Edmonds-Arby's Although it's funny Not my president

Yeah, I don't really know Edmonds And it's like I feel bad Because I don't think the people of Edmonds Think of themselves as Home of Whirly Ball And a 1990s-themed Arby's It's not really themed to that It just hasn't changed since the 90s And it's beautiful and purple inside there God I love that Arby's But like that's been my experience Of Edmonds which probably people In Edmonds are like hey Walsh we have some other things Going on here too

Edmonds has this very renowned Underwater like a scuba diving park That's in downtown Edmonds In the water obviously By where the ferry comes in There are these just lovely restaurants And places to go I mean Edmonds is absolutely Charming as can be also home of rick steves who is charming as can be so these are all the things that i would imagine the residents of edmunds like to lean into they may lean out of the arby's they may lean away from the arby's and lean towards the uh lovely farm-to-table artisanal restaurants that they've got down there anyway thank you so much to all of our donors today for making the show possible hello and welcome to top story how about some meat you like turkey who are you calling turkey all right i'm ready to win my thanksgiving that's not happening andrew so lay it on me what are the three tips to make me a turkey day hero okay here's the actual title of this and i don't

want to be mean but i do want to give credit to the person who wrote this even though i will be taking some exceptions with some of the things she wrote it's um want to be the best guest at Thanksgiving dinner, bring these three things. And it was written by Rosemora Lurie, if I'm saying her name correctly. Or is it just Lurie? L-O-R-R-E.

I don't know. I was instructed not to do any research for this, and I was happy

to oblige. But isn't there a famous person with the last name Lurie? We don't have to worry about it. Well, there's Chuck Lurie, creator of the Big Bang Theory and Young Sheldon. I don't know if it's L-O-R-R-E, but I'm not really leaning into the best part of this story so let me let me start off let me start off by reading directly from the setup of this because while this is a story of three things i want to kind of take exception to the premise as well um rose mora writes here back when i was a perennial guest at other people's thanksgiving dinners i would always bring wine and flowers to the host who doesn't love flowers i thought oh yeah and uh when is an extra bottle of wine ever gone to taste ever gone to waste i should say honestly well we don't have to get into that i mean i feel like wine in our house often goes to waste because people bring wine that we don't like

but maybe i'm kind of a little snobby about that i've got a couple bottles of i've got a bottle of wine when i bought my house the real estate agent gave me this like gift bucket well yeah i'm yeah they did you did you well you used you had a 10 as your agent so i'm assuming you got like a one of those um like uh december to remember like an infinity with a bow on top of it i got a car

yeah absolutely no i think that's kind of standard as a housewarming gift ours was just wonderful there's a little there was something in there that i um that i think about every single day and it's a little reminder of when i'm washing dishes it's a little um prism that hangs from our kitchen window and our friend sarah who's our realtor uh gave it to us and it's just a small thing um there are some other things in there as well but like it sends little rainbows around the room when i'm washing dishes after tbtl and it just always reminds me

of how lucky i am to have this house when you're staring off into the prism and kind of distracted and just really inside your own head would you say that you're in a prism of your own mind i

certainly am i certainly am so you have a bottle of wine anyway i would say that sometimes the

bottle of wine though is not i would i would probably sooner drink antifreeze because every It was it was a nice gesture, but it's like everything in this, you know, it's all cellophane wrapped in whatever. And it's got like two wine glasses, but it just looks like it's from a winery that I don't even think exists. Like I Googled it just to try to figure out, like, is this a thing? And it's like, I don't think so. I think that they just made this up for the purposes of putting a bottle of wine in this bucket or whatever.

Well, Rose Mora says that she's changed her tune. And she actually thinks that bringing wine and flowers is a burden on guests because then the host has to, like, find a vase for the flowers and then they have to find an ice bucket for the for the wine, which then don't bring white wine. And it doesn't have to be in an ice bucket. It can just be on the table, bring red wine and also then just bring flowers that already are in one of those are already arranged in a little vase. Like those just seem like very workaroundable issues. I sort of feel like she's shadow boxing at a problem that isn't here right now. But, okay, let's say you don't want to bring flowers and wine anymore. This is what Rosemora says we should bring. Number one, your own apron. Upon arrival, hang up your coat, don an apron you brought from home, or better yet, wear the apron under your coat so you can reveal it Clark Kent style. I would say that's Superman style. Stride into the kitchen and declare, I am here to help. You have become a holiday hero. The host may be too frazzled to think about delegating And it's much better than the passive Let me know if I can help You are now the host's go-to I disagree with this though Everybody Everybody's running their own Thanksgiving game And like sometimes you really don't Want somebody there How can I help, how can I help, how can I help Sometimes you really appreciate that help Sometimes you really don't need help And you just need somebody to leave you alone So that you don't burn the stuffing or whatever And I sort of feel like letting them know that, hey, listen, I'm here if you need anything, but no pressure. Just turn to me is fine. This is so look at me, Louie. You're barging through the door and opening up your coat and you've got an apron on. And, hey, I'm here to help. It sounds like forcing yourself on the host to me.

Do you not like it because my apron has a very buff male body on it? Are you kidding? That makes it look like I am super buff. Does it make you jealous? That's an apron?

Damn. Damn, I got to get one. That's a very realistic apron. I thought you were just buff, man, and shirtless on Thanksgiving for some reason. So what do you, I want to make this quick because it is a Thanksgiving show and we have some Thanksgiving to start winning. But what do you think of all that?

You know, that's an interesting question because what I do like about it is that it does represent. it represents a person who genuinely actually wants to be helpful as opposed to me who genuinely wants to sit on the couch and watch football but seem helpful so like i think what you don't like about it is that you are kind of like in the kitchen you're you're chopping your brussels sprouts you've got your whole thing going and you've kind of got a system and someone in there is kind of messing up your system so i understand that but also i do like the idea that somebody is being kind of like hey like i actually want to be useful to the degree i'm wearing an apron i'm ready to go you know i'm going to do something as opposed to what i do from the couch which is do you need anything hoping and praying that the answer is no we got it so i guess i just would i would rather a person was genuinely there to help than being like me so that's why i don't i'm not as irked by it as you are but i'm also not the person who's in the kitchen doing any of the cooking who would have their their system or their routine kind of messed up yeah and like

I think I think you can be earnest and say hey I'm not just saying this please if you need anything if you need me to run often it's like hey we're out of buttermilk or some last minute thing that you don't realize like I'm here to be your runner like let it be known that you're earnest in being willing to help if you need a somebody to run out and get ice or or mashed potatoes for you like Genevieve said like Genevieve's mom is here and Genevieve said to me last night hey maybe mom would want to help with the mashed potatoes and i'm like hey that'd be great that takes something off my plate i'm not i'm not like super possessive of all these things but like i don't know the way this is described here it just sort of sounds like you're you're pushing yourself because you want to you want to be a thanksgiving hero maybe you can just be a thanksgiving guest um here's number two it's my list bring your own desk bell sort of taters are done bring your own take home

containers for leftovers now that's i think that's kind of nice i'm just a jerk today i think that's presumptuous wait so you're saying it's presumptuous because they're assuming they get to take home some of the food that you made that you worked hard on maybe here are the things i'm

struggling with here i am picturing this some sort of thanksgiving gathering with folks that you have not had thanksgiving with year in and year out and year in and year out because if you if you're talking about a thanksgiving gathering with your family where you everybody really knows their roles at this point both the bread rolls and their roles in the kitchen or not in the kitchen or whatever it is you don't need this list because everybody already knows what what role they play in this if this is advice for somebody who's going to a thanksgiving gathering where it maybe it isn't family or it's a new situation then i think bringing your own take home containers is really presumptuous that you're going to be taking these folks food home with you

i guess so i mean i guess that is a bit i mean i never thought of it that way and also i am maybe i'm maybe what's happening is i am very presumptuous because when i go to my folks house i'm maybe i'm not taking leftovers home but i'm definitely going to town on the leftovers the next day and i'm not asking for permission i'm not going mom would it be all right if i reheated these mashed potatoes i'm just sauntering up to the refrigerator and fixing myself a plate so i guess i consider the leftovers to be community property yeah and again i and i might

be misinterpreting this list but i sort of feel like with your family like you've been just doing the same you know with some change over the years and evolution over the years because some people are getting married and some people are having kids and so the family the the larger family sort of changes around you but for the most part you guys have you know very evolved roles and again it might just be that you're the person who watches tv and i think that's fine i think it's nice to let some people relax and crack chestnuts and watch a football game not everybody has to be working but um if you're really close and you know hey listen mom every year tries to send me home with these things but then i gotta return her good tupperware or she runs out or whatever then it's not as presumptuous but certainly if you're kind of a new guest or if you're not family and

you're just like bringing you're going to a friend's giving as it were and you just dump

out a bunch of gladware like a santa bag full of mail from kids writing to santa or whatever like that's a bad look here's number three though because i promise you i wouldn't belabor this is this is the last one on the list a handy stain remover when the gravy boat gets passed around a little too enthusiastically your fellow guests will appreciate a quick refresh from a tied to go pen or as we've recommended as a laundry pre-treat some oxy clean spray that you can bring in a little travel size bottle now here's the deal with this um the writer says that you can kind of hand this out for folks or

let them know this is all on a table i would just keep it in your bag or your pocket or whatever you've traveled with like it's nice to have that if somebody does spill something you could be the hero by saying oh hey i happen to have a tide pen uh that's good i don't think that i think all of these sort of make it sound like you need to make some sort of grand presentation so that everybody

likes you i see so yeah you don't like this all feels like very look at me to you about this person

who's showing up to win Thanksgiving that's the thing but I do think having a stain remover on your person along with maybe a little bottle of Advil like there's I have a our friend Anita always carries I'm amazed by learning what's in her bag she carries um salt with her I believe packets of salt in case she's somewhere and something isn't salty enough and what else did she tell me the other day that I was just amazed it's butter she carries a thing of Crisco no um i can't remember what it is but she's got these things that she carries around you and your splenda too you used to carry splenda around i kind of like that because you can just like you know tuck it away and if somebody needs it you can like kind of pull it out and be like oh yes

i do have you covered friendo i do like the idea of you know being sort of prepared for lots of different things i will say though whatever happened to just using some seltzer water like in the movies oh yeah like whatever happened to like you know i don't know 1940s this stain will never come out like kitty foil or something and then someone hits it with a little seltzer water also for that matter whatever happened to the bottle that has the seltzer in it that you shoot at someone possibly a marx brother i was about to say or a clown uh when's that coming back by the way i mean look at the resurgence of seltzer we're all drinking bubble water all the time i've got some right here in fact uh how is that and you know soda stream i know you guys use a soda stream when are we getting back to that novelty jug that you can

spray people with i think that i mean those things confused me as a kid and i wonder if they confused if they confused me the way maybe a rotary phone in a movie would confuse the youth of today like what in the world like that technology is starting to become unrecognizable compared to cell phones um but like i remember seeing those bottles and be like what i've never seen anything like that

in real life i feel like it's ready for a comeback though don't you maybe i'm looking at one right now oh really vintage seltzer bottle vintage 1930s mesh it always had like a mesh outside as well i really i feel like this is red this is gonna have a moment andrew we got to get into the

seltzer bottle game maybe that maybe we're the ones maybe we want to be i'm looking at the one that's mesh here this business idea the mesh doesn't look familiar to me um although i see the picture that you're you're talking about they do have these things now is anybody is anybody i think somebody's making a modern version here that i'm saying i'm seeing all vintage ones right now

but maybe that's just because i typed in vintage maybe i wanted it to be like i didn't want it to just be a soda stream but like i do feel okay here we go nope you're right this one i was looking at

is also vintage from wow yeah these are awesome i just don't you think can you see somebody who

has like a really nice bar god i used to have the coolest bar at my old house this bar cart um i used to have a lot of cool things at my old house andrew i'm thankful i'm not encumbered with all those possessions that i purchased and loved um but i feel like if you could have a real nice bar cart and then one of these kind of vintage seltzer bottles it just seems like it'd be a fun uh i don't know kind of fun little novel way to get something that we're all drinking copious amounts of anyway i get the sense there's a little like carbon uh what do you call that like uh

the little cartridge that yeah cartridge sure yeah like a co2 cartridge or whatever a co2

cartridge that i think goes uh on the top which i guess probably charges up the you know bubble eights of the water i believe it's a scientific term yeah this looks fun to me andrew i'm looking at one on web restaurant store.com yeah i guess restaurant store was taken actually it's called webstrantstore.com I'm a webstrateur I'm a webstrateur yeah what a weird name for a website but I'm looking at this thing and it looks really fun to me it's a new one but it's you know looks kind of vintage and it just seems like on a night in particular like maybe a night you didn't really want to actually drink any booze you just get like what they're showing is like a sliced lemon and some ice and then you're like your fancy bubbly water you put it in there that seems kind of fun

can i ask you a quick question yes you can do you have 600 what does it feel like to win thanksgiving do you have 600 or 631 and 41 cents because i just sent you a 1950s dutch green glass soda siphon seltzer bottle with metal tap that looks right up your alley and it does come in at a nice, tidy 630.

$31. Yikes. But is that, I got to be honest with you. First of all, it is very cool looking, but I don't like that it's actually from the 1950s.

Right, you want somebody to...

I want a new one, and that's not usually the case. I usually like stuff to be sort of vintage. The other question is, this one doesn't look like it has a place for that cartridge. I wonder how these things worked back in the day. You shook it up.

You shook like crazy until your still water became bubbly.

You shook it up, and you sprayed it at a clown. Yeah, exactly. Like you said.

All right. I'm sorry if I went too negative on that I enjoy the tips I really like the stain remover Just the tips Have the stain remover on standby I would argue I don't think that bringing wine over Is going to be a hassle to anybody And you don't have to put it in an ice bucket Just get a nice red It's Thanksgiving time It doesn't have to be a chilled white And always be there Be present and let people know That your offers to help are earnest but you don't have to have a big apron on underneath your coat that says look at me

you don't like an apron with a superman logo on it

there's a right way to rock and a wrong way to roll you can't just listen to your soul just remember that life is number one you can't be having so much fun just remember that Life is much fun You can be nothing but fun

Wow, I'm looking through my email. There are a lot of unread emails in my box right now. Sorry, everybody, if I haven't responded to you, but I think I have pulled out all the relevant information, which would be today's Blur's Days.

Nice.

Starting with Biago, who says, Sending a happy Blur's Day to my amazing ten of a wife, Marika. She is the moon and stars to me, an amazing partner in life, and the most giving mother to our daughter in five, Juniper. Nice. Although she has to share her big day with Thanksgiving, she is so much better than a turkey, it's not even really close. Happy birthday.

Meals like spiced turkey meatball pitas with bib lettuce and carrot salad.

Happy birthday from your TBTL daddy. Marika, you're better than a turkey. It's not even close.

How about some meat? Do you like turkey?

What are you calling turkey? Joseph in the Bronx says, it's that time of year again. November 26th is my Blur's Day number 43. Wish me luck. I'm wishing you luck. I've been there. It's fine. It's going to go smoothly.

God, I would kill to be 43 again. Get your whole life in front of you. You know who else is... At 43, I would never think to fight teenagers That are driving too fast in my neighborhood I was a young man I was closer to them than I was To what I am now, which is an angry old man

And I think most people in our listening audience Also know that November 26th Is my friend Lenny Samosky's birthday From grade school

Of the Samosky's pizza empire Jamie says Geauga I believe there's a Geauga location, right? A Geauga County location? I'm not sure Yeah, we looked it up, I believe it was in Geauga County

Jamie says, I want to wish my dad, Troy, a happy birthday this Saturday. I hope you know how loved and appreciated you are. Hope your day will be as great as you are. I agree. I concur. Happy Blur's Day, Troy. Hope you have some good post-Thanksgiving chillin'.

Natalie, Minneapolis.

That's in Minnesota, by the way. I'd like to wish my TBTL pen pal, Ann in Oklahoma, a very happy birthday. She's been such a fun person to get to know through the USPS that stands for the US Postal Service over the last two years I always look forward to reading her letters and hearing her TBTL opinions I promise to write soon Happy Blurs Day Ann. What do you think Luke what do you think Ann's TBTL opinions are that were just perfect I would guess that we never get anything wrong. Presumably yeah yeah

let's just let's assume that's I do assume that I do assume that I have one more blurs day here it's from justice who says wishing my sister hey justice you know justice I think we I mean maybe we have multiple listeners named justice but I did a hey dummies that was a question from a listener named justice nice and I was thinking it might be the same justice it might be thanks justice no justice no peace wishing my sister in TV tell granddaughter Marika in Duluth a very

TBTL Grandar why does that make me laugh you know what it just occurred to me this is Marika again Marika is getting Blur's Day wishes from Biagio and from John

Justice, sorry I didn't group these together. I love your song, by the way, Toy Soldiers. Oh, shoot, that's Martika. My bad.

You're a turkey. Let's see here. Justice says, wishing my sister and TBTL granddaughter Marika in Duluth a very merry Blursday. I'm so happy for you and your beautiful family. I hope you get to take some time for yourself. I'm sorry I forgot to get you something, but hopefully a shout-out on an imaginary internet radio show makes up for it. A shout-out. How about multiple shout-outs? Happy Thursday, Mariko. And happy Thanksgiving to everybody.

Good luck, everyone out there with winning your Thanksgiving. I'm actually going to be going over to Becca's house, her mom's house, and getting – she's an amazing – really, her and her mom are both amazing cooks. So I'm going to just roll up and go to town on some mashed potatoes. But all this talking about Thanksgiving and food, I know this is truly insane, Andrew. I'm tempted to make some instant mashed potatoes and eat them right now for some sustenance on the ride down to Salem where I'll be getting real mashed potatoes. That's madness, right?

You prefer the stuff, the instant potatoes?

We were talking about this, I believe, at the Eagles the other night. I'd say that was sort of towards the end of my memory of things. and and um i do think it is just magic the the instant mashed potato is i mean i will take real mashed potatoes anytime but the fact that you can just boil some water throw a powder into it and then you stir it with a fork and suddenly have a pot full of i would say passable mashed potatoes

that is just that's stunning to me i've never made them and my only experience with them i don't I don't have such um cozy thoughts about them uh only because in whatever wherever I was in the rare occasions that I had instant mashed potatoes it was in some sort of like institutional setting like maybe a school or something like that I just have a vague memory of somebody scooping it out so it looked like ice cream but it seemed to be very very dry and flavorless but I don't want to besmirch all of them it was just like wherever I had it as a youth it was not for me yeah um

And definitely there, I think, are probably some decent versions and some not-so-great versions. And if it's a cafeteria-style situation, it might be on the less great end of it. Or if you ever read the chow hall when you were in the military, I don't know if that stuff was very good or not. You were in the military, right?

No, but I was in prison for quite some time.

Ah, yes, definitely. You know, that's a TikTok that I've been following is, well, I told you about this a while ago, just people cooking food in their cells, and it's fascinating, the ingenuity. But then there's a kind of sub version of that, which is people just filming on their cell phone what the food is in prison, what they get, what they're eating. And it's quite interesting. It does not look good. No, it does not look good.

No, but you appreciate the innovation, though.

I do. Well, the stuff they make looks okay, although they're often making it in like a garbage bag. They're big on cooking in a garbage bag with hot water. That's a big way a lot of this stuff gets done. But anyway, I would say don't do your Thanksgiving meal today in a garbage bag with hot water unless you're listening to us. You're incarcerated, in which case I hope you're having a nice Thanksgiving there as well. All right, everyone. Thanks for listening. We will be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you until. Oh, and we're going to play a little what's in the box tomorrow, right?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I stopped at the P.O. box yesterday before the holidays started so that I could get in there. And yeah, I got a couple of I got a package here from New Hampshire. I'm looking forward to opening.

Oh, heck yeah. So please join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Thanksgiving. Hug your loved ones. But don't put your face too close to theirs because one of you is probably carrying a terrible, terrible virus right now. We'll see you tomorrow. Until then, please remember, no mountain too tall.

And good luck to all.

Power out.