Muse

All right, let's get to work, actors. I got three words for you. Glengarry. Glenn. Ross. Coffees for closers only. You call yourself a salesman? You son of a bitch. Hi, I'm from downtown. I'm from Mitch and Murray. So, you've got, all of you got, just one week to regain your jobs, starting with tonight. Okay, we're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see what second prize is? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired, but I've worked out a little... Okay, okay, no, no, no, stop. I'm not kidding. You're making me nauseous. TBTL.

you know i think about this and what about this internet thing do you do you know anything about that sure what the hell is that exactly don't you kind of feel like a sellout can you really

call it a sellout when they give you a free tesla for doing the show i think i'm looking forward to

cracking up uh i hope i can like you know totally crack up so uh i haven't like totally cracked up

in a long time are you saying boor boorns i was saying boorns my uh grandpa likes to say hot diggity dog as i like to say hot man all right hello good morning and welcome everyone

to a tuesday edition of tbtl the show that just might be too beautiful to live i'll say what's

up doke my name is luke burbank i'm your host i'd rather check myself before i wreck myself

coming to you from the hollywood broadcast center right here in portland oregon my goodness bring

it back home baby bring it back home look at all these walls with sheetrock on them and paint

and um these floors i'm standing on it's amazing to be home and very comfortable to bring you episode 3870 in a collector's series.

Let the fun begin.

I don't know what you're doing as you're listening to this. Some people are out on a walk maybe or tending to their kids or you could be doing all kinds of things but you might want to sit down for what I'm about to tell you from the top stories because it's truly shocking.

We really

Whatever upgrade we have to pay to get the shorter version Of a Shocked Crowd SFX It's probably worth it I hope you're sitting down because there is news That the Mars company The makers of M&M's Were just trying to get more Attention for their stupid Super Bowl ad By telling us that they were gonna get rid of the spokes candies uh we will talk about that also is it the case that the seattle kraken hockey team uninvited a local seattle rock band from playing they were supposed to play three nights at climate pledge arena but after the first night they were asked not to come back uh the kraken sort of like intimated that they were maybe drunk drunk people are so meta but the band says we were absolutely not drunk uh they didn't invite us back because we sang a song

that made fun of jeff bezos how dare you people even say that and um it's uh it's hard to know

who's right in this i'm siding with the band because i don't know it's hard to side with jeff bezos on anything it's also unclear if he had any uh any knowledge of this whatsoever probably not anyway we'll get into uh things going on there at climate pledge arena and we'll also say hello to this young man the longest running cobro of the show may be best known for his depictions of the tall ships in this uncertain economy it really pays to diversify and to build up different skill sets and he's not it's important to know he's not just relying on

podcasting as one of his streams of income i go by the block king online i sell illegal lego builds

on the dark web he's andrew walsh and he's joining me right now good morning my friend that's my kind

of blockchain right there that is blocks yes sir i'm into neither uh did you imply like moments before we started recording like seconds before we hit record that you are embarrassing us in front of our bosses at american public media do i understand not you just you but we you know that we're associated what did you do i

I, well, first of all, I received an email from our boss this morning that said, I mean, I have to give our boss, Beth Perlman, massive credit. I mean this, non-sarcastically. I don't think we could have a more hashtag chill boss about the fact that I regularly fail to do any of the required HR stuff. This is how my boss told me that I had once again missed a deadline on some cyber training. isn't that for techno geeks with spreadsheet this was the email because as you mentioned on the show the other day we've gone from having one like two hour long sesh that we have to do to like quarterly seshes which I guess are at least shorter Beth said hey Luke it's my annual soon to be quarterly favorite reminder new cyber security training this one is short and more to the point Please see below and do take it when you get 15 minutes free Best, Beth

Did she say anything about the policies around taking the quiz during a recording of TBTL?

No, but I have more on that, by the way, coming up as well as part of the story I'm going to send you something, though Let me see Sorry, I'm kind of doing all this on the fly I'm trying to pull information from a few different sources And send it to you and continue my delightful style of talking I'm trying to find something that I texted myself, but the last three things that I texted myself before I rexted myself are all just basically me trying to find people to do sheetrock work near where the remodel is that I'm doing. Okay, let's see. I'm going to text you something that's going to truly, I think, shock you, Andrew, as you heard from the sound effect that I played. I just texted you an important photo from my morning from about 30 minutes before you and I dialed up today it looks like it's gone through it is now

you're waiting on my reaction before this story can move on

I would like you to take a look at the thing that I'm sending you right now it's a text message so it'll show up on your telephone I've got some Wordle scores here

but you're not in that okay put those to the side

this is not the time for Wordle or Hexamper I'm just waiting here focus on the thing that I'm sending you don't blame me

you're the one who's coming up to this Sorry you didn't pass the quiz You got three Of five You have to get four of five Luke We talked about that on the show Didn't I also give you the answers to these

Those were the only two I got right Were literally the ones you read me On the show the ones you and I Talked about on the program Were the only two out of the five

That I got right Which by the way one of which was counterintuitive And you argued against the right answer on the show and i had said no but i got i believe i got that one right let me you did because yeah like on the show though last week you were like no it shouldn't be that answer and i said no i i do know it's this answer even though it's counterintuitive it had to do with passwords but luckily you learned that um the right answer was not what you might think and so you got that one

right but you still have the two that i got correct were the ones that you literally spoon fed me on this very program the three that i got wrong were let let me give a little more context though because honestly this is not great for me or you or really the tbtl certainly not the listeners with like rajesh and the rest of the folks who are over there on the um cyber security side of life for apm um i had uh i don't know if i've mentioned andrew but i've been going to the

gym lately can we get the short version of the shame drop too and we're putting in the bid i actually know my favorite scenes from ted lasso it just goes on i like it what if she

that would be amazing if the hannah of hannah waddington the actor if uh the character that she played uh septa ulna or something from game of phones if when they cast her uh on ted lasso as the ex-wife of the club owner, the kind of person who did not ever expect to own a soccer team and then found themselves as the owner, if she was still in the character of Septa Ulna, with the head wrap and the severity, and just wildly out of context for everything else happening on the show. You know, Jason Sudeikis is just in there kind of doofing it up lovably, as is his want. Has anybody, and I'm not here to take shots at Jason Sudeikis, but has anybody had a bigger career out of playing basically kind of friendly doof than Jason Sudeikis in the modern era.

I get... Jason Sudeikis, yes, okay? I had to picture him for a second because I do get him confused. He's Ted Lasso. Yes, I know, but I just... There's something that goes on with him and the face of, and now I can't think of his name, who plays Barry, the voice we just heard at the beginning. Bill Hader. I get these guys confused.

I know they're not alike. It doesn't make sense.

I find them to be so different in terms of how they present in the world.

Will Hader seems sinister to me. They were both on 30 Rock, I think. I think they both had cameos, like short runs on 30 Rock during a time when I wasn't super familiar with either one of them. And because of that, they sort of. But again, their character is very different and different storylines. But because of that, I just have this weird thing. Anyway, I kind of plays in the face blindness. But you're right. he's just uh he's a very lovable uh guy um i guess he's a little bit i guess he he's a little in 30 rock i guess he can put you off a little bit yeah yeah 30 rock i think he's just kind of

a you know a sweet guy who's moving to the cleave yeah right and lemon is tempted to move to the cleave with him right right right he's flawless in that too right yeah so i when i i started taking this test this morning before i went out to exercise and first of all andrew it is shorter and you but i is there a way i could have literally skipped to the quiz because i still had to let various videos run their course well you can just skip to that as well i just skipped

to the end of the video so if the video is three minutes i just dragged the little bar over until there was only like five seconds left yeah you couldn't do that on the old one but the new one you can do that and then in the last like five seconds of the video is them just rehashing it with very clear text, the lessons that you just skipped.

Okay, so that makes a lot more sense. I thought there was some kind of Mike Tyson-esque cheat code that just got you to the quiz, like you just go past all of that. It never occurred to me that I could just manually fast-forward through the video. So what I was doing was, as I was kind of wandering around this morning and getting some coffee made and doing things like that, I was just letting the thing run its course. But I had it muted because I was also listening to Morning Edition. I didn't really need to hear the voiceover. So to say that I didn't monitor the whole situation super closely would be accurate. Then I went and I did my little exercise, and then I came back, and I was, you know, kind of in that mode right after you've worked out where you're kind of, first of all, having a certain amount of positive feelings. There's some, like, serotonin that's being released. I was a little dazed and confused. and i wasn't looking closely i got i was at that point at the final boss as they now say and i what i didn't realize i didn't read the question closely enough to where it was check all that apply that was where i was confused i was thinking that these were just questions that had one answer like you know use a vpn when you're at a cafe you know and it was like check all that apply but instead i thought it was like there was only one answer And two of them were very similar One was like, it will keep people from compromising your information Which is like, yeah, no doy And the other was like, it'll keep your device safe or something And I picked the wrong one And then I started to panic, Andrew Because I got the first one wrong And then I got the second one wrong Then I started to overthink it And then I got the two that you gave me And I still ended up with only Three for five And then it said you failed And I was like, are you kidding me? Do I have to go back to the beginning of this? But no, I was able to just retake the quiz, and I got five out of five the second time. Oh, that answers the question then.

So a moon door does not open up. You do not fall to your death. Okay.

No, in fact, when we get the next module, the next quarter, the HR says you can't do a moon door anymore on people. Interesting. It's considered an HR violation.

There is a stranger at a cafe who wants to throw your computer through the moon door. A, do you let him? Yes, of course. B, no, only if you're VPNed in. C, yes. Make the computer fly, mommy.

D, hang up the moon door and immediately report it to the IT department. That's always the answer. And by the way, I know this because when I'm doing the training for a major software concern on the east side for this exact thing, it always ends with, it's always, whatever you're doing, stop that and immediately report it. Immediately go to HR. That's the big push. They just want, and you know, I mean, like it sounds like I'm just trying to, I don't know, stick up for these people that are very nice so as to pay me a good wage for for doing these videos but like honestly that's the whole thing they just would like they just want more info and they're like if someone gets hacked they'd like to know about i was talking to becca's brother i hope this is probably okay to talk about um he we went to the blazer game last night a whole bunch of us well basically becca's entire family and then all of their plus ones and it was super fun first of i won two bets that i didn't even realize i had won andrew and that was a great feeling this is not an ad for gambling on sports nor should it be you know past uh wins are no guarantee of future wins etc but uh we went to the blazer game and um First thing, we were having some dinner beforehand. I know nothing about the state of NBA basketball right now. Like, I have no educated takes on, like, if so-and-so is going to have a good game tonight or not or which team should win. So as we were walking from dinner over to the Moda Center, I just thought, you know, the bet that I would like to put down is just that the first basket will be a three-pointer. This is not—doesn't matter which team makes it. It just means the first thing that happens when someone shoots it and it goes in is going to be a three-pointer.

Can I ask you, as somebody who doesn't watch basketball at all, is there a rhythm to the game that makes that? Do you feel like that's a 50-50 bet, or is it weighted in one way or another just based on the rhythm of the modern NBA game?

I think it's unlikely because I put $20 on it, and it made $95. Okay. So if it were considered to be a coin toss, it would be like you bet 20 bucks and if you win, you get 20 bucks. And if it was considered to be very likely, it would be that you bet 20 bucks and you might make $10 on the 20 you've risked. There you go. So it was – I think it was – and I can't tell you why that is except for, you know, there are a lot of three-pointers that get made in the modern NBA. But it's still not more likely than someone just like driving it down to the basket and laying it in or hitting a mid-range jumper or something. But I just wanted to have a little, you know, sunshine in my pocket as I was walking over to the game, because truthfully, I don't really care deeply about the outcome of the Blazers versus Atlanta Hawks. As much as I've tried to become a fan, I just there's something in me. And there's, you know, host V. Graff disease or something. My body on some level rejects being a Portland Trailblazers fan because I'm still the antibodies in my body are still Seattle Sonics. They still root for Sam Perkins, a.k.a. Big Paper Daddy. so I just wanted to have some kind of a thing going that would be kind of fun for me so I put my little wager in and then the game had already started by the time we got there I was confused about when the game started and then I'm walking in and it's like the game's already underway there's been scoring and I'm thinking well I probably didn't win but then I look up and I realize well wait a minute the score is Portland has three and Atlanta has five so I'm like it's very possible that Portland got those three points from a three point shot but I look down at my little phone app and it says that it does not show that I've won anything so I was like I guess that wasn't what I thought it was either the three pointer could have not been the first thing that happened or it could have been like somebody got fouled and made one free throw and then later someone made a layup like I just didn't have enough information I just was kind of like well that was a silly bet that's why that bet is plus 450 and then we're just sitting in the stands and I look down at my phone and all of a sudden there's an extra 95 dollars in there nice because that little thing hit i was like wow that's fun what a fun thing but then i've now i'm i'm like chirping about it so like becca's whole family which they are just the nicest most like with it people they're all just like kind and smart and hard-working and good people none of these people have the draft kings app on their phone Just absolutely none of them, including her nephew, Alexander, who is a certified genius kid. I mean, certified one of the smartest young people I've ever met in my life, who, by the way, now is quite intrigued by what's going on on Luke's phone. I'm looking around like at his parents like, hmm, is this really do we really need trouble uncle doing this right now?

So I want you to know, though, I am getting some as you talk. I'm getting some notes from Beth Perlma again saying that we are getting pretty close to Lake Wobegon talk here, as you described this perfect family. So just be a little bit careful of that. We don't need any Garrison Keillor lawsuits. Shame.

Anyway, I was kind of excited only due to the surprise of that. I was like, well, that was silly. And then it was like, wait a minute. Hey, that worked out. How fun. And so then I'm like, well, let me try another one. So I'm thinking, again, I don't have any sense of who's going to win the game. I'm just doing these things where I'm trying to guess what the next thing will be, which is just like throwing a dart. You know what it's like? It's like that kind of bingo where they put some chickens out, and you bet on where the chickens are going to poop. And that's how you get—it's as arbitrary as that, basically.

Well, I was going to say, in all seriousness, when you said that you made a bet on the first score of the game, and then you kind of missed it because you weren't there. Your bet didn't miss, but you just missed the moment yourself. I was wondering, like, oh, maybe it would be more fun to say what is the last shot in the game going to be because then you have the entire game to look forward to that.

Interesting theory. Yeah, that could be. I mean, that certainly, I'm sure that is certainly a bet that is offered. You know what I mean? But so then I'm sitting there, and I'm kind of like, well that was kind of a fun little lucky thing that happened so then i'm like okay now i got a little like fun

money from from the good luck i had at the beginning so i was like eh what's the next basket going to be and it's like i put i don't know five bucks or something on the guess is that it's going to be the atlanta hawks are going to hit a three pointer that's going to be the next field goal that happens right so the hawks have the ball they're dribbling down the court and this guy passes it to another dude who's like right next to the basket and the guy jumps up and lays it in and i was like well that was a waste of five dollars that was stupid but then they called a foul so the guy the shot didn't count because he got fouled so he goes the free throw line he makes his free throws or whatever i'm like okay well that's there's my bet and then the blazers come down and a guy drives to the lane and almost makes a basket but gets fouled he shoots some free throws now i'm just like kind of distracted thinking about other things and then the next play the atlanta hawks shoot a three-pointer goes in i was like well you could have used that three plays ago and then i looked down at the phone and i won the second bet because what i had bet was that the next field goal in other words the free throws did not count as a field goal they were a different category that is like a free throw and a field goal is the next made basket that's not like from the free throw line which i didn't know any of this was the rule and then it like populates in my account again you won the second bet and i was like okay i'm shutting this down for the night that's officially as much good luck as a person could have throwing a dart blindfolded at a chicken that's crapping on a bingo board

stop throwing darts at chickens I know PETA would not like it I have a follow up question about this but then I also just had something pop in front of my face there was a

larger point of this before I got waylaid with my no no no I just I'm saying that to

remind myself okay okay because I now have something I need to go back to our this is embarrassing I need to go back to our conversation about actors too in a second but I was going to just quickly ask you as a non betting man and a non basketball watching man there must be a lot it must you must be somewhat harried if you're trying to make a bet about what the next score is going to be the one thing i know about basketball or that i think i know about basketball is it's pretty fast-paced like football okay the other team has the ball you have some time to open up the app and like this drive is going to take at least four minutes off the clock or whatever but basketball

seems real bang bang it is it's a very dynamic environment and what was interesting was sometimes i'll be home and i'm like watching a basketball game i'm kind of bored maybe a couple of glasses of wine in and i'll just start you know like it's two teams that i really don't care about and i'll be like let me just try to throw five bucks on like what's the next thing gonna be and it will constantly invalidate the bet it will keep saying sorry that's close sorry that's close because i think there's a lag between like let's say the game's happening in toronto and it's the raptors against the suns and i'm watching it in portland and i'm like on my phone and somehow in that loop it's really hard unless like it's coming out of a timeout when it's they're going up and down the court it's super hard to ever get the bet in in time because of the delay i think and so it's constantly just saying sorry that's over sorry that's over i felt like i'm in the stadium with this this is like the sting remember that movie where they do this whole elaborate thing where they're basically like they're more at the source actually that's not true the sting is the opposite of that what they do with the sting is they build a whole fake thing that makes the bettors think that they're seeing the horse race results in real time when in fact they're seeing it on like a 30 second delay which is like giving robert redford's crew that the the in-between time to get the real bet in point is i felt like i was actually more able to do this because i was looking at the people playing and i do think that was true i was able in both cases i only did two bets but in both cases just like went through whereas if i was watching at home i think you're right the pace of the game makes it really hard to do that within the game because it's always about three seconds

from changing and so what was your larger point about all this before that gets lost i was talking

to becca's brother scott and this is the part that i think is okay for me to share he owns a couple of bars in portland that are really um great bars and one is called r&r and one is called a 21st street pub and he is on the subject of cyber scams uh he got an email he said from somebody saying i'm throwing a 50th birthday party for myself and i um would like to rent out your entire club and i'm gonna hire a band and basically like i'll pay whatever it costs because i'm this is a big deal for me and this is kind of i'm getting to this late so price is not really an issue um i just need you to pay for the band though i just need you to front the band the money and then i can settle up with them when i get there for my 50th birthday yeah and of course he went back and forth and it just turned out this is like a pretty elaborate scam where you as a venue owner end up sending money to a band that probably doesn't exist for a 50th birthday party that's never happening but it sounds like it was constructed kind of carefully enough like this wasn't one of those like all of the like grammar is wrong and it's like Like all caps, it's like Goonies not welcome kind of like, you know, font like this. That's a pretty sophisticated and targeted scam, right, for people who own music venue or people who own bars and potential music venues to scam them out of money.

He did go back and forth a little bit before he kind of realized what was up, because it seems like such a strange ask for me, like that the venue would ever be asked to put up their own money, Like to have money come out of their coffers even temporarily, that just seems like a non-starter.

It does, but my guess is in doing it, usually these things – I think the market is pretty efficient with this, right? Like there must be just enough activity. There must be just enough venue owners who do take the bait on this that it's worth – because it's not like sending – I mean, again, that's a pretty specific. Like you have to go and you have to figure out what is like a venue that's actually active, right? Or a bar that has bands play in it. And that is, you know, what's an active email address for the owner of that play? Like there's a fair amount of sleuthing as opposed to sometimes you'll open your email or you'll look at your text. And it's clear that someone just somehow got a hold of like 8 million email addresses and it's totally not targeted. This one seems like you have to put in a little bit of work to send one of these. And I don't know if they'd be doing it unless at least occasionally they got a hit.

Yeah. And this is very different because this was us self-selecting. But do you remember, I won't go into the details because I think I've told this on the show several times, including when it happened. But do you remember when I was moving down to Los Angeles, we came very, very close to wiring, like I think first and last month rent or something for a temporary apartment for me. And there was just something that seemed a little bit off. And Genevieve, it was almost like the person, because I think Genevieve was helping kind of take the lead on finding this place for me. She loves doing that, and she was just very helpful. And she just, I remember being on the phone with her. She was in her office. I was in the newsroom at Cairo. And she was like, okay, I guess we're ready. There's just something that just seems a little bit off, and I can't put my finger on it. And the fact that he didn't, the person we were supposedly working with didn't blanch at all about our question about bringing pets. like somehow like the fact that he wasn't a pain in the ass about that was like as you might say a salmon colored flag and so i just said well let me just do one thing and while veves was on the phone with me i copy and pasted this person's email address and i just googled it just like what happens when you google this email address and the the first several results were just like these don't you know these scam lists that said do not send this person any money weird i mean the feeling of that near miss it was just and i mean luckily i still don't think i've ever fallen victim to something like that but that was so close and that was a significant amount of money you know that was like rent a couple of months rent i think i know and i feel

like there we're just now we're just doing the cyber training for folks but yeah i do feel like they're they are getting in certain ways more sophisticated and then of course they're still just the like complete blunt force like we're gonna spam this out to a million people we that we this is totally unconvincing and it's very obvious that you know that it's not real there's still a lot of that out there but some of them are getting smarter and more new if somebody sent me one about podcasting again i don't think i'm trained enough and also just savvy enough to like i can't imagine a universe in which i'm ever forwarding anyone i don't know any amount of money

for any reason right yes i mean it goes back a little bit to that venmo thing like we were talking about the other day like hey i accidentally sent you some venmo money can you send it back

like just never do that that being said if somebody were to send me one that was about podcasting and it was somehow specific enough they were saying hey i'm starting a podcast and we're looking for some consulting help and so now we're like okay that's a thing i do i i'm i do a podcast so it's now it's like well it's not totally insane that somebody would maybe want some consulting from from me as the co-bro of a podcast has been around this long so you know i'm kind of in in the way that it's like you own a bar and you have live music there and someone says i'd like to rent out your bar we're like i do own a bar it does have live music um and so once they you know once i'm thinking oh and then they're like we're interested in getting some consulting and um you know where this is our day rate that we pay and i'm looking i'm like oh it's a pretty good payday now my gears are turning i'm thinking gosh how much hardy panel can i buy with that you know i could i don't know i could see a world where i start to get kind of sucked in i think for me it would stop at sending anyone money but i don't know i i think the more specific they could make it the more likely i would be to sort of go down the path with them i think that that's

the thing, though, right? At what point does it pivot to, and now we need you to send us money for XYZ? How does that ever seem? How does that ever seem reasonable? Like even in the example you said, like maybe this person's like, okay, great, looking forward to working with you. But before we get started, I need to buy a new Marantz recorder or something. I just can't imagine that you're kind of like, okay, well, we still haven't had our first consultation. But first, here's even $400 for a recorder. I just find that hard to believe that you would ever open your wallet.

I could imagine, and I'm now at this point, I'm just giving cyber criminals free tips, which I don't know if that's really the goal of the cyber training is for us to convert it eventually into giving tips to the cyber criminals. But I guess if this – now I've made it this completely theoretical or hypothetical. I often mix up theoretical and hypothetical. If this group somehow forwarded me – they transferred a bunch of money to me, which again would involve me giving them my bank account number. I mean, maybe that could be the scam is, hey, we'd like to – because I do actually do this thing. When I have a gig, like a side gig, usually the way that it works is for me to hold the dates, I'll say, okay, so here's what we've agreed on for the cost. And it's like half of that up front to like block it out on my calendar and then the other half upon completion of the work. So maybe if they said, okay, we'd like to send you some money for this, although, again, that's the question is why would I give them my password? I might give them some routing information, but I was going to say, if they did a thing where they somehow tricked me into thinking that I'd gotten money from them, like, here's some money, and then, like, we actually overpaid you. Could you refund us $500? There was a clerical error. Never.

Never? Just don't. No.

Even if you had the money in your account.

Because sometimes those are, like, and I don't know exactly the ins and outs of it, but that's what you're describing is often the scam, right? Because it looks like there's money in your account, but it turns out that's an overdraft on their side. So it's not real money. Like, again, I don't know the ins and outs of making it look like that when there's no money backing up where it looks like there's money in your account. But just generally speaking, I don't know what the right recourse is. If you're like a little bit down the road with somebody like that, but get somebody else involved immediately. Call HR.

Andrew, could he use that advice before I got that email from Michael Barbaro? Hey, listen, I do. Because I'm apparently consulting on The Daily, but I had to give them $1,000 because they overpaid me. Uh-huh.

Hmm.

Yeah.

No, that was me doing a Barbaro. Anyway, I need to clear something up, and I can't wait until after the break because I said something incorrect. And also, it really goes back into my weird face blindness and confusion over certain actors. I've told you that I get all the people in The Departed confused, right? Like, who are the people? Like, it doesn't make any sense. Only because they're not interesting Marky Mark and Matt Damon Jack Nicholson Not Nicholson, I know him, but like Damon and Marky Mark and one other person

I think probably DiCaprio's in that one

Yes, I get all three of those guys confused It doesn't make sense, I'm not justifying it But I just can't, if I think of one I can't think of the other Well, I realize I made a mistake in talking about Bill Hader And Jason Sudeikis before, which I do have First of all, Sudeikis was in 30 Rock Bill Hader was never in 30 Rock that I can remember.

I didn't feel like litigating that because I've recently... It was Forte, and that's the thing.

The three of them together. Now, Hater and Forte make a little bit more sense that I get them confused, but Jason Sudeikis makes no sense. I don't know why he's grouped in there.

Now, let me ask you this. Who was Will Forte in that?

Will Forte played a kind of freaky-deaky partner of Jenna for a while. I think that he was a drag queen or a cross dresser in some way who would dress like her and that's where the original attraction was like Jenna basically fell in love with a performer who was dressing and acting just like her and then they had like a real sex positive relationship like it was a pretty funny storyline and I'm pretty sure that that was not Bill Hader that was Will Forte and the reason this came in front of my face was I was going to grab some tape for tomorrow I was just sitting here looking at my intro collection. I was like, oh, I can't use Will Forte again. I just used him today. I was like, no, Will Forte is not the guy who is in Barry. Luke just told me the name of the guy in Barry, a show that I'm currently watching right now, and I already can't think of his name. I'm only saying this because I have the three names written down on a piece of paper in front of me. If you say Will Forte, I cannot remember the name Bill Hader. It somehow erases it.

Just remember, Bill Hader, his teeth kind of look like chiclets. Bill Hader. That's how I remember it. Okay, that's interesting. There's something a little, I would say, unusual going on with Bill Hader's smile. Now, people, Bill Hader, I love Bill Hader. I think he's very funny. People love him. He's considered a national treasure. So I feel comfortable mentioning that I do find his teeth slightly interesting, and that's definitely why I always remember who Bill Hader is.

interesting what tell me about will forte's dental records will forte's teeth are are are beautiful

yeah let me take an absolutely just a beautiful uh smile i saw a clip from the last man on earth like it was i think it was on like tiktok where will forte's character is officiating a wedding and i totally forget like i must have watched that show to the end because i really enjoyed it last man on earth i know you were kind of like medium on some of the plots but like there is a scene i presume towards the end of the show where for some reason will forte's character has grown a huge beard and has grown his hair out massively but only on one side of his head so imagine totally clean shaven totally shaved head on one side massive like robinson crusoe on the other i don't know what the plot of that was but it visually made me laugh my ass off it's the silliest thing

i've ever seen so can i ask you this were all three of these fellas on snl at one time during a period that i probably didn't watch much but like you think that they sort of overlapped at least a little bit or is it generally a similar era hater forte and sudeikis as my very much similar i wonder if that has something to do with i bet you it would yeah they were all kind of

they were all making their mark uh in fact you know what uh Sudeikis and Will Forte were in a great recurring sketch that I just watched the other day which is where they're bowling announcers oh okay so Sudeikis and Will Forte are bowling announcers and the bit is well first of all they get the look down really well which is it's sort of set in the 1980s and it'll be like Kristen wig will be like a bowler her name is like you know uh the she-ra the terminator and she has like a big mullet and like she's very serious about her bowling but they've got the they've really got that look down of like 1980s bowling coverage that or maybe early 90s that you probably remember too didn't you say that bowling used to be on in your home sometimes when you were a kid

yeah more as an 80s sort of thing my mom loved bowling so bowling was a very comforting kind

of sound and feel to me and like they really had the kind of the the aesthetic of that like espn like i think of it as being kind of late at night but it could just be on a saturday afternoon like at some bowling alley in the midwest that's not not you know particularly fancy but they've got it all done up for the the espn cameras anyway it's just a vibe and they really nailed divide but the bit really is that will forte is absolutely the worst announcer and everything and jason's today is just like a normal espn sports guy and he'll like ask a very simple question of will forte and will forte will have no idea how to respond but jason here let me just play you a little bit if i can this is uh come on man go talk to your wife kids if you're here we

I'm Pete Twinkle and seated next to me providing great color commentary and boy, oh boy, can this guy make one hell of a pulled pork sandwich.

Greg Stink. Oh, thanks, Pete. It's our fifth anniversary in the booth and I got a present for you. It's a bracelet. I'll give it to you later. It's in my double. Well, that's real sweet of you.

Why don't we meet tonight's players? Up first, we've got Donna St. Louis. Now, Greg, correct me if I'm wrong, but hasn't Donna been undefeated since mid-April? Oh, I don't know. You know, okay, well, she has. Oh, good work, good work. But the jackhammer, Michelle Rayburn Jean, has taken the lead by storm. Look at this, movie star looks with an arm that cooks. Oh, there's a clever use of the hand dryer right there. Now, Greg, she got the nickname the jackhammer because she throws the ball so gosh darn hard. Have you ever seen someone so young throw so hard? Oh, I sure have.

do you remember any names or specifics as to where no uh now that i think about it i'm not sure i'm gonna retract that statement not sure if i've seen someone throw so hard all right

etc etc that hits a little bit close to home for me let's take a break all right uh let's do that

let's take a break uh let's get ourselves together and then we'll come back and do some more tbtl in a moment hello and welcome to top story i got a uh a text a few days ago from you andrew that was i'm gonna i want to go back because i feel like or was it an email maybe it was an email it had a cryptic subject line uh and i wish i could find it right now because oh is this the m&m's thing

yeah i think i wrote who would have seen this coming or right exactly but i think i was somewhere

where i couldn't yeah it was uh who would have guessed and then just a link which doesn't actually give away a lot of the info and i was like but It was one of those things where I was in the middle of doing something. I might have been on a shoot. I was like, what is he talking about? But I couldn't really fully focus on it. So I walked around for a few hours just being like, we're being fired. Is this because I haven't done the cyber training? What is this about? And then I opened it, and it was, of course, the fact that as you 100% called, it's an Andrew W. Tuesday, the Mars company is just basically trying to get more attention for their super bowl ad which it looks like anyway and i've read now two articles on this i've read way more today about this than i wanted to because i've gone from thinking it's kind of a funny conversation about the culture or an interesting conversation about the culture war to just being like i can't believe how much of my brain i'm now allowing the mars company to live in with this story but i read this this piece that you sent from polygon um written by Anna Diaz. Good news, the non-sexy green M&M is coming back. On Monday, M&M's parent company, Mars Wrigley, announced it would be pulling its M&M spokescandies indefinitely. However, the company told the New York Times on Friday that the controversial move was all just a PR stunt, and that the spokescandies will indeed return for the Super Bowl ad. So then I click on the New York Times story, which is really long. Like, way longer than I thought it should have been, and I read all of that. And, yeah, I mean, they were basically doing exactly what you said they were doing, which was just ginning up more attention for their stupid candy.

Yeah, I sent this to you a few days ago. In fact, I think I stumbled on it because one of our listeners posted it to the TBTL Slack page, so shout out to that person. But I carry a lot of anger still about them. I feel like the Mars Corporation kind of trolling us all by making such a big deal about the footwear and trying to make it sound – the footwear of these spokes M&M candy things things and trying to do this media campaign where they were trying to make it seem like they were going to be more inclusive but the whole things always seemed trolly to me like they were trying to get the right wing kind of whipped up which of course they did and then they had to react to that and now they released this press release well I guess we broke the internet we got to get rid of our spokes candies and Maya Rudolph is going to replace them I'm just like no they're no that's not going to happen like that I think I said on the show like the the commercial during the Super Bowl will be them trying to fire the candies and Maya taking over but then there will be another commercial near the end of the Super Bowl where the candies fire Maya or some shit like that like it just doesn't matter and that's a bet I would take on drafting and I would bet with you like

that should be will the M&M's candies either be fired by or fire Maya Rudolph I you couldn't be more right anyway that's such a good call it's like it's it's weird I was thinking about this

again today and i'm becoming a bit of a a one note um what's a name that begins with the letter and i'm becoming a one note nancy on this and i realize that but it's like i um that's another way i i fall asleep at night by the way i just try to think of names uh alphabetically starting

with well you didn't go with johnny one note which was one of the more that was one of the more vivid garbage pail kids that i remember johnny one note was a kid who was playing a trumpet but he was blowing so hard that his butt was exploding out of his pants with a fart oh no

johnny one note i i'm just uh i was looking it up but i can't find it here but um wow you know when you really think about it a lot of those cards had to do with flatulence and um has anybody oh there there it is there yeah oh that's a rare one that's 1986 johnny one note rare i wonder how

many i wonder what johnny one notes other names oh and i'd forgotten about this part he's actually blowing a note like in his butt explosion is a I can't tell you is that a musical note a musical

note is that a sharp it's a quarter note anyway I think it's a quarter note anyway I don't know if I'm right about that but I think so anyway 139.99 oh I'm looking at one for 797 so oh but then that doesn't you on the dark web again with your illegal Lego bill that I'm bit torrenting this garbage pail kid for you um what was i anyway it's just like this this underscores my irritation with super bowl commercials like it might seem counterintuitive to people who know that i love tv commercials and that genevieve and i have hosted a podcast about tv commercials for a long time now and like we truly love tv commercials so why wouldn't we love super bowl season right isn't that like the super bowl of commercials you know like but it's not it's so annoying people get away from the fundamentals everything's got to be splashy it's usually nothing lives up to the hype i hate super bowl season i hate super bowl commercials it's like i love drinking but i don't love st patrick's i actually was thinking about that as i was reading this article i was like it's a little bit like it is a little bit like that in fact i had a thought now this is going to get into a little bit of sports talk Coke.

OK, but this past weekend was the AFC championship and the NFC championship games. And I think for the first time in my life, like I really knew the backstory of all four teams. Actually, the Eagles I knew the least about, but like certainly the AFC matchup I knew well and I knew it was going on with San Francisco. And I didn't you know, I had a Sunday where I had responsibilities, but I was like I watched most of both games while I was kind of whatever making food I watched on my iPad blah blah blah but like it wasn't even like a day where I sequestered myself and like just watched you know both games from whistle to whistle but I was driving yesterday listening to sports radio people reflecting back on the championship games and it occurred to me I think I like champion if what do they call it championship Sunday whatever I think I like the two championship games on a Sunday more than I like the Super Bowl I think the Super Bowl makes things too first of all there's two games on Championship Sunday if they call it that and secondly there's too much stuff around the Super Bowl so it ends up being a fun thing that has less to do with football I guess but if you just like football and you're at all invested in the teams that are playing I think that the championship games leading up to the Super Bowl is actually just more entertaining

and better a better sunday that's an amazing take and i think i actually agree with you because the stakes are super high like i mean the only higher stakes could be the actual super bowl but there it's pretty close like it feels like every play matters a lot but you're right there's like 80 less j-lo at halftime you know and less like just the the the pomp and and ceremony and all of it the falderal around the super bowl and the we're going to a party and someone's making a cheese log that looks like that's actually kind of fun it's fun i mean that stuff is fun but it's

just different and it's just like it seems like and in fact like i i don't even want to like i loved last year's super bowl halftime show and i think you did too and i know that you're not dissing i'm just sort of like clarifying like it's just a different thing i'm kind of looking forward to rihanna last year was it was like i don't even know it was like the hip-hop one yeah Exactly, it was like a lot of competent performers. Yeah, exactly. Dre. That was fun. That was a really, I wasn't expecting it to be so splashy with all the cameos from 50 Cent to whatever, everybody. But anyway, Bill Hader, I believe, was in it. Will Forte, Jason Sudeikis, you recall. Anyway.

You really just ripped through those notes. I have them written down. They're written down in front of me. I think you're rewiring your brain.

They're written down in front of me. I just got to carry this piece of paper around with me at all times, and I got it set. But, yeah, anyway, so I'm looking forward to Rihanna, actually. I think that she's kind of perfectly set up to be a Super Bowl halftime performer. So I'm looking forward to the Super Bowl, but just in a very different way. And maybe this is just maybe just more sports fandom. But I just think the quality of a football afternoon, a championship Sunday, just seems so much more interesting to me. Also, these were just good matchups this year, I guess, without getting too sporty.

It also speaks to my addictive nature that I'm with you that there being two games is better than there being one game. Maybe they could just play two Super Bowls like the team just have to play back to back. I was working on the house with my dad, so I wasn't watching any of it. I was like listening to it. I was bizarrely listening to the first game on my car radio with the windows rolled down while I was using my phone to time-lapse video myself taking down cedar shingles off of the studio. Wait a second.

So you weren't streaming? I cannot find the football games on the radio anywhere up here because I keep on finding myself driving during, like, the third quarter. And this last weekend, I scanned through every station on the AM and FM side. I could not find a radio broadcast.

They weren't playing it on KJR, whatever that's called now, or Cairo Radio, whatever that's called now, the sports station.

No, they both had sports talk radio going at the time. That is shocking to me. Yeah, those two definitely. And I think there's a couple of other sleeper sports radio stations in the lineup here. But I couldn't find any actual live coverage. I could just find people sort of referencing what was going on in the game and then giving analysis and talking about basketball and other things.

I was able to get Kevin Harlan and the Hall of Famer Kurt Warner calling it on Westwood One Radio on some AM station that was floating around. But the thing was, I was using my phone to video document what I was doing. And so because normally I would just listen to it on my phone on Sirius. I have the app, you know, and it has all of the different games. So my phone was being used. So I don't have a radio at the house. And so I pulled my car up And rolled down the windows and was blasting my car radio Which was the move that we used to pull When I was like a teenager And we were playing pickup basketball ball but we wanted to hear some tunes so we'd like pull the car up like at the schoolyard like at Bagley and then we'd be bumping music whilst playing it was something I don't think I've done in probably 26 years of my life but I'm listening to the game and I'm kind of working and I remember when the first game was over and the first game was kind of a blowout because San Francisco you know was so injured at the quarterback position it was kind of never really a game and I always remember thinking i'm so glad we still have the chiefs and the bangles like it was like god if this had been the whole game if this was the whole day of football i would need more football but i'm gonna get more football like it's sad how big of a deal it is like the the sort of postpartum that i feel after a big football game is over and there are no more and and there are no more football games for another oh i don't know four days it's like very sad how keenly i feel that loss well

this is the biggest desert right between uh this last you know last sunday's games two days ago's two games now we don't have any football this coming weekend and then you have one super bowl i feel like i think there was a time when the end of the football season hit me harder now i feel like the end of the baseball season hits me a little bit harder because um baseball is just so long and it just ingrains itself into your life or at least my life so much that like i I remember the first Sunday after the Mariners were eventually eliminated from the playoffs and, like, just, like, making coffee and hot chocolate for my volunteer gig and, like, not knowing what to listen to. Like, I almost, like, I felt like a bird looking in a mirror confused. Like, I was, like, just, like, bumping into things. It's like, I don't have the pattern. And it wasn't even baseball that I would traditionally listen to during that phase of my morning. It was always the Sunday pregame show, which I didn't even really like that much. They're recycling interviews with the skipper from earlier in the week. They're doing this. They're doing that. But like but it was like but that was my patter, you know, and I was like, well, I can't just put on this American life right now. That just seems so weird. Like it takes me a while to transition out of baseball mode because it, again, just sort of ingrained. I don't know if that's the right word, but sort of ingrains itself into my life so much.

i i think this is going to be and i want to apologize to the listeners in advance i think this is going to be an intense intensely engaged baseball year for all of us and i'm kind of trailing behind you and der's like in the last few years like i'm very interested in the team and i try to catch the games but like you all do like fantasy baseball you're very aware of the players and even the like the machinations behind the scenes as far as our preseason with you know who the mariners might be bringing up who's looking good at the single a level all this stuff that i really just don't spend much time thinking about but with them getting to the postseason last year and the dramatic fashion in the toronto series and stuff i and also just you know the fact that my life is sad and empty i can just and i'm going to be doing a lot of home repairing still i see this as being a very very baseball forward you know spring and summer for me and hopefully fall if they're still playing like I think I'm good I can feel myself falling

down a hole of Mariners obsessing yeah I'm excited we don't have to talk about it but I mean I think the Mariners some people are saying that the Mariners didn't do enough in the offseason but they certainly whatever moves they did make on paper make them a better team and the reason I'm nervous Luke is because I've never lived in Seattle where it's a very dangerous thing as they say in It truly was a Shawshank Redemption. Speaking of Jason Sudeikis, I I've never known the city to be this excited about Mariners baseball and, you know, jinxes aren't real, et cetera, et cetera. But I find myself really nervous because like the the sports station I listen to is already running spring spring training promos. And it's not even like spring training is around the corner. you have um shannon uh why am i blanking on her name dreyer shannon dreyer just starting a promo right now that says spring training is here and like it's not even quite here but like everybody is so excited about spring training it's like i've never known this town to be so excited about baseball and in some ways it's fun and invigorating but in another way growing up as a or as a browns fan i guess i was just kind of like oh no hope hope is a dangerous thing lets everybody just can we all just like look away a little bit like when you have a crush on somebody and you don't look at them because you don't want them to know you have like can we all just like not look at the mariners for a little bit and like pretend just let them do their thing over there i tend

to think and we should move on because we actually have another sort of sports adjacent story that i want to talk about today but i tend to think that structurally baseball is for some reason a little different than some of the other sports particularly football like i think usually when you have a baseball team that has a really good raw or a roster that should be competitive on paper they tend to be that way and when you have a team that's really bad they tend in baseball like i i think that the i think that the kind of what you think about a team going into the season is more often bears out to be the case in baseball than in a sport like football and i can't explain exactly why maybe because in football you could have one key player injured and then you're kind of screwed like i i just think i just think that the Mariners are going to be pretty good this season because they have a lot of young players a lot of talent and they did improve maybe they didn't improve enough maybe they didn't go after the big free agents but I'm I'm feeling hopeful is what I was going to say but but really what I want to talk about is this Kraken thing did you see this story in the Seattle Times I did not see

it until you sent it this morning but then I did read it yeah I have opinions so the Kraken hockey

team which also I guess they're like in first place I I've officially realized Andrew that I'm just i'm not i don't have it in me to be a hockey fan like i don't have what it takes like i just can't bring myself to follow it to care which is which is an interesting awareness for me because i do as is evidenced by everything we talk about on the show i love sports i like pro sports uh i'm sad that seattle doesn't have a basketball team the addition of an nhl team seems kind of exciting i thought maybe i would start to fall get into the fever of the team no i'm not trying to

I'm going to put you on the spot here. I'm just saying this for the hardcore Storm fans. Seattle does have a basketball team. I know what you mean. They don't have an NBA team.

Yeah. So I just haven't been as sort of beguiled by the Kraken as I thought maybe I would be. I thought something might kick in. But I did see this story that I thought was kind of interesting. So there's a band in Seattle called Who Is She? And I guess that they're kind of made up of a bunch of folks in other bands. Some of the people who I actually know, like I know the people from Taco Cat. And there must be like the bands that Who Is She, it's comprised of Julia Shapiro, Brie McKenna and Robin Edwards. They're from the bands Taco Cat, Chastity Belt and Lisa Prank. And they've also had Emily Noakes. That's who I know of Taco Cat, who was performing with them. There must be something that the Kraken do where they try to like – and this is also very, I think, in the modern sports era. If you're like the Kraken and you think, well, Seattle has a vibrant music scene. Let's figure out how to harness that. Like I don't feel like the Yankees in 1965 were having on like whoever the cool bands from New York were. Like we've moved into an era where if you're a pro sports franchise and you can somehow tap into the local whatever zeitgeist, that's now something that they try to do more than they used to yeah i mean and i'm not i'm not

trying to start a whole thing here but do you mean all like sort of like even embracing the macklemore at the mariners games and just yeah i i feel and then the way that like sea tech airport

when you're walking through you hear like hi this is jeremy from pinback make sure you don't leave your bags on it and again i understand what they're trying to do they're like in the airport scenario they're like we need to transmit this information seattle's known as a music town they have a sub pop store in sea tech like let's tap into that so it's not there's certainly nothing bad about it but it's just a different vibe than the kind of vibe when i was growing up and i guess they have some sort of residency for seattle bands now at these kraken games now when i read the story i thought oh the band is probably like standing at like center ice playing and i was like well that'd be kind of weird for hockey but i don't think that's what it is i think they're in kind of like a side stage because i watched a little like twitter video from the folks in this band who is she and look like they were playing somewhere in the arena but not like standing on the ice um but they were supposed to play for three nights and i guess after the the the first performance that they played they were playing a cover of a song by the band le tigre and this song was from 1999 and La Tigre's song was called My My Metro Card and in it La Tigre was um which was a super cool band in New York that I really enjoyed a lot J.D. Sampson I forget the other person's name in La Tigre but I was a La Tigre fan and their song from the remnants of Bikini

Kill right oh really I don't I didn't know that yeah I think so yeah I mean they're remnants but I think they were like kind of a side project or the next iteration I think well so their song

kind of like slams or i don't know i want to say slams their song makes fun of rudy giuliani and uh the song is my my metro card and they were making fun of then mayor rudy giuliani so the uh people in who is she decided that they would do sort of like an homage to that song but they would call it my my orca card because that's what they do you have an orca card i do yeah so is every so all um like public transport transport all public transit in seattle whether it's the

bus or the light rail is that all run through the orca card yes which just had a big upgrade this

uh last year and it operates better now um so their song my my orca card uh was kind of a play on the letigre song and they decided though instead of having a reference to rudy giuliani although funnily enough you could still do that in fact it'd be probably be arguably as true today as it was when letigre did it but um they decided to put jeff bezos in there so these are the lyrics Oh no, Jeffrey Bezos, he's such a total jerk, shut down all the bookstores, billionaires do not work. And they played this song, they got off stage, and they say that they were approached by folks from Climate Pledge Arena, who basically said, that will be your last performance, thank you very much. And now the folks from Climate Pledge, their official statement is basically that for a reason that they're not super specific about who is she, the band, did not meet their standards for family-friendly entertainment. They said we did not allow performers to consume alcohol while performing. They were kind of indicating that maybe the band was a little bit drunk. but the band certainly thinks that this was because they made fun of jeff bezos and the thing is named climate pledge arena which is a big amazon thing and also one of the co-owners of the kraken is this guy named andy jassy who's like a super high up at amazon person so uh that's kind of where things stand right now but the thing that i felt really bummed about for the band was they now have to sort of clear their good name and they were like they released a statement that said look hey we were totally not drunk uh we were also really excited to play these shows i mean you they go to great lengths to kind of clarify like they weren't like sneering at the whole thing based on their statements they were like stoked about it they said they rehearsed a lot they had family coming to it they had family flying in to watch it's like they were really excited about this it sounds like they weren't approaching it like we're cool rockers and like screw this we're going to shit all over it it sounds like they were really stoked about it and somehow this innocuous line about jeff bezos or whatever their just general demeanor really rubbed the climate

pledge and cracking people wrong yeah and obviously i don't have any insight on this other than when i read in the paper i obviously come to this with a lot of bias against the whole band yeah right amazon and bezos thing um i'm going to just read you you summarized it quite well but i'm just going to read directly what the seattle times quotes as being part of the statement from the arena which is this decision was not related to the band's choice of song we require that our artists are professional punctual and avoid consuming alcohol during their performance as such who is she did not play the following two games we wish them well which also sounds like a little shit-eating grin there at the end of that statement um but also like they don't say the band was unprofessional not punctual and drinking alcohol but they imply it very specifically there to which one of the members of the band took umbrage in the article saying like they they're not even outwardly saying specifically you guys were drunk they're they carefully worded this as the band member points out maybe to avoid litigation or something and and i i just i abs i don't think you sort of alluded to this in in your intro too like i don't think anybody is thinking like that jeff the the the steel hand of jeff bezos came down and squashed i don't think this ever reached bezos before they were fired probably right like i'm sure this is a bunch of people who were scared who were scared of bezos and scared of of the whole operation and the other the other thing that like just really struck me and this is going to sound real real i don't know snobby is probably the wrong word very judgmental on my part but i told you that veves and i went to see Arcade Fire Or is it just Arcade Fire? I'm not even joking We had a whole conversation about this Yesterday with other band names But we wanted to see Arcade Fire At Climate Pledge Arena and First of all I promised I would never call it that I think it's such an insult to call the arena That when the company globally Has done so much to hurt the earth But then they just slap

Will you call it the Kledge?

The Clarina But anyway It was my first time in the arena since it was kind of rebuilt, you know, and as a sort of Bezos, Amazon-y property. And man, I was really struck at how, is anodyne the right word? It just was like, it was like. I'm always bad on that word. It was like walking. It just felt like it was weird to go see a rock show there because it felt like I was walking into like a really big bank with some like with some food, with some food and beer offerings. I can't explain it. It was just like so sterile in there and just like so like a boring ass conference center that would have been built.

in 2022 or 2019 or whatever it was built you know like there was just something and i wasn't like obsessed with it the show was what it was but then oh i do think i mentioned on the show that like it was weird i feel like we all left now the arcade fires fan base is probably closer to my age so maybe we're not like the young raucous rockers we once thought we were but it was just like i'd never left a concert that was so quiet afterwards like everybody i was i was using the restroom quickly as were a whole bunch of people as we're leaving the arena and it was like a library like nobody was talking and if anybody was talking people were sort of like whispering like there is something about the whole like kind of environment of that place that was shockingly unrock and roll and again this and it's it serves a lot of different purposes um and i you know i don't have a handbook out about what the you know what the proper vibe of a venue should be and how fans should react to it but um you know here they are they're doing this this hockey game there and mostly it is like a hockey arena and they're they're trying to highlight these bands as you say but like it does not surprise me in the least that a bunch of worry war to answer to people who they think are going to be mad at them if they let this band keep on um insulting jeff bezos during a during a latigra cover is like it's just everything just

fits into place for me on this also i'm wondering how they even picked up the lyrics yeah like i'm at a live show i mean my hearing is just shot at this point but like i'm at a live show i'm at like you know i'm at the kledge and like there's all this stuff going on there's presumably like a beer guard people walking around you're probably hearing jock jams coming from down where the actual like again i don't know exactly how this was presented if the entire stadium pa system was turned over to this this band who is she or if it was like they were playing somewhere in the arena but there was other things going on it just seems like such a chaotic environment that i don't think i'd even pick out the words jeff bezos like it would be so which makes me think one employee of either the hockey team or the arena one kind of senior person caught it and then just went into like damage control what they perceived to be damage control mode i think maybe my favorite response from the band is that they clarified that they were absolutely not drunk when they were playing they took this very seriously and they rehearsed as i've already mentioned but that they said but once we were told we weren't coming back we absolutely did drink the five cores light in the green room the five cores light it was a specific number of cores light that were available in the green room they're like we absolutely did drink those cores lights if you're wondering after we were told we were not being welcomed back and i'm like that is exactly the correct move if you're told that you are not i mean steal get all of the office supplies you can on your way out as their frog has their dog walking you out of the building get everything you can get your hands on get all the Coors lights out of the green room fridge you can

to at least get something back and this is there it sounds like there were four musicians involved three core band members and one extra vocalist and like they had five Coors light in the in in the band statement the quote unquote green room I think they were also like sort of dissing on this idea of of having five course lights it reminds me of that uh that tape we played the other day you sent it to me of a stand-up comedian joking joking around about miller light saying like i'm drinking miller light tonight which means about 18 beers and five hours later i might get up

to something like it means i'm gonna be a problem in six hours i'll bet you that i'll bet you that

i have no idea i've sort of built a little storyline around this day i mean i'll bet you these these band members or it sounds like they are a pretty jokey laughy crew it sounds like

you know certainly taco cat has a great sense of humor yeah and they have a lot of they have a lot

of energy and you know i'm sure that and you know this implication that they weren't punctual or professional like first of all how do you define professional like i this whole thing just sounds like bunk to me and i absolutely stand by the band i think we only have one course of action

here which is a tbtl live event in seattle where we invite who is she to come play yeah their cover of the la tigre song yeah let's do it it could be a fun full i mean now let's be honest that's going to be a come down for the band yeah no they're in because there's no way we can afford

five coors lights for the quote-unquote green room i can give them half of one of my miller lights i remember when i remember when taco cat was um was like an almost i feel like a no-name band when i first moved to seattle it was this tiny little band and a friend of mine had a crush on one of the members of the band because she was a server at one of the restaurants we would go to for breakfast like every single weekend. I mean, way back in 2009. And now Taco Cat is like an institution here, which is super cool. There's one small thing I wanted to tack to the end of the story, Luke, which is when you describe the people who were nervous about these lyrics, which might not have even been comprehensible in the context of the arena. I'm sure that...

they're also worried about social media you know what i mean like yeah like you said that you watched a little clip of this performance i don't know if it contained the offending lyrics but i mean that's the other thing too it almost doesn't matter if the people in the arena can't pick up these lyrics about bezos if there's any concern that it's going to go on instagram or twitter and then eventually make its way in front of the great jeff the great jeff somehow he looks like

the great kazoo in my mind they actually do look kind of similar bald head uh-huh they both float

yep here i go once again with the email every week i hope that it's from a female no man it's

not from a female all right emails and females i understand from yesterday's show that we've got a lot floating around you'd even propose the idea of an all email and female program this week Maybe we can do that.

This is a little story here from listener Emmy Kate down in Florida. So I think that maybe we can probably just play this one today because it's quite the story that had me at the edge of my seat. Take it away, Emmy Kate.

Hey, Luke and Andrew. This is listener Emmy Kate from Florida. And I was calling because, Andrew, you were telling a story about falling asleep in your basement and the back door being open when you woke up. It opened itself. you were more worried about the cat my brain would have said someone is in my house ready to kill me

now I do want to just jump in here and quickly say I immediately thought of the cats running away but there was part of I remember looking in my studio where all of my computers and stuff are which is right by this door that the window blew open and I remember seeing all of my equipment and computers there so I quickly dismissed the idea that there was a break in because I sort of thought like if there was somebody who was breaking in they would probably stop right away and just start clearing out this room. I don't know if that actually makes sense, but that's what my brain process was doing.

Because I'm a woman and I live alone. But one day I had gone upstairs to shower and I was coming back downstairs looking for my coffee and a dining room table was shoved up against the counter in my kitchen. Like it looked like someone was using the dining room chair to get up on the counter and like hide in a cabinet? I don't know. I don't know where my brain was thinking they were going with that, but like no one should have been in my house but me and the dog and he was with me. So I was terrified. I should have probably, you know, called somebody, grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter, you know, block and was clearing my house every single location that someone could be hiding. Terrified. And I couldn't find anyone. Can we just pause it here, Andrew?

Mm-hmm. I really feel like there are two kind of people. There are the people that would clear the house. And the people like me, who would get the hell out of there. Like, I am not, like, I don't have that. I don't have whatever Emmy Kate's gumption is to be going around with my knife being like, show yourself. I'm like, you know what? You can have it. You live here now. Me and the dog, we're going down to the Denny's. We're going to wait this out. probably come back with the police like i am not the guy who's going around the house

looking for the bad guy i just live in my car now and i watch the house and after five days if there's no movement i will maybe move back in terrified and i couldn't find anyone

and then i heard little little bumping rolling sounds and i realized my dining room chairs are fairly light and my Roomba is fairly stubborn and in its process of sweeping up after the little furry menace that lives with me it had shoved the dining room chair across the floor run into the counter and then somehow managed to free itself from the chair leaving it to scare me to death so that's all I have no power out just bye

I think that's a pretty good power out Wow. I'm glad that we have resolution to that story.

Now, just wait, Amy Kate, until the Roomba and the pet start plotting against you, as happens in this house. And then you're really going to have something to be afraid of. Once the animals and the robots start working together. I almost said Robarts, like Jason Robarts, the actor.

RIP. Get him always confused with Bill Hader. Were they in SNL together?

Jason Robarts' teeth look like candy corn, and Bill Hader's teeth look like chicklets.

that's how I keep them separate I have to think of him through that what's the P.T. Anderson movie where frogs fall from the sky Magnolia? Magnolia, I think Jason Robarts is in that

I don't think I even remembered that he was in that

I believe he plays Tom Cruise's die

elderly uh father i want to say yeah that you're absolutely right by the way he's definitely that's one of his uh big films um i mean big films towards the end of his career i somehow knew him from some like older like almost black maybe not black and white but like he was always the old i grew up in the era where he was always the old person in movies like i don't i don't remember the i don't remember the period where jason robarts wasn't just the like cantankerous grandpa type yeah in a movie right yeah um well emmy kate i'm glad that that you're okay and that is really yeah that's that's scary i said this when we were talking about this originally but one of the things about being out working on this remodeling project and you know if my dad's not there or whatever like being alone in this house is and because it's kind of out there and because like you know when i'm in this apartment there's a lot of layers of security that you have to have a key card to get into the building i have a very very secure door that's locked like you it just i feel 100 percent not in any kind of physical danger from someone else while in this apartment but when i'm out there at that house i'm like what if someone just got a wild hair and came down here and like it's weird to have that thought again because i haven't had that thought

in a long time well for me when genevieve and i first bought this house which we're coming up on a year now it was i think i think we took the keys and maybe early to mid-march and um you know we had the keys but we were still living in our old apartment you know there's a transition time and we would come here to do projects i believe i started a painting project here and i hated leaving the house behind like i we hadn't even spent a night here yet i don't even know that we had anything in the house other than like tools and project supplies but um locking up and leaving this place and then going to our old neighborhood to sleep for the night. I remember just being like, it's like a month ago, I didn't even know this house existed.

And now you're like leaving your child behind.

Yes, I felt like I just wanted to like wrap it up in bubble tape, as they say. I felt so vulnerable locking my house up. I think it was maybe just like that early, I don't know, part of that sense of ownership maybe.

Well, there's another version of that. You know, Camaro Kev and I have this friend who's kind of like a friend of legend in our group, or at least in me and Camaro Kev's friendship, and our friend JD, which is a guy named Kelly. And I don't know if you've ever heard him mention, but he was actually the reason that I became friends with all of those guys because I used to play pickup basketball with this group of dudes. And this guy Kelly was part of it, and that's how I ended up meeting Camaro Kev and JD. And Kelly is a real character, and he and his wife were in the process of buying a house. This is like 20 years ago. And he really he was very antsy to start working on the house. And one time I remember like calling him being like, what are you up to? And he's like, oh, I'm in the house. I'm cutting up the floors. And I was like, I thought you didn't buy the house. He goes, yeah, but what's probably going to go through. He had broken into the house before all of the paperwork was signed. Like they basically were like their offer had been accepted. But as you know from buying a couple of houses, there's like your offer has been accepted. It's made it through the inspection. And then there's like the day you get the keys. Yeah. And there's a lot of time in between. There's like, yeah, you're probably going to own this house, but you probably shouldn't break into it and take a like power saw and start cutting up sections of floor that you're going to replace before the ink has actually been applied to the contract. And I was like, and he ended up getting the house that it was, it ended up going through. It was fine. But I just remember, even by my standards, that was straight up maniac behavior.

Do you know, I don't know if you're still in touch with this person, but like, do they still have the house? Did that project work out? Is it beautiful now?

My guess would be, because then he and his wife, at the time, I don't think they had any kids, but they'd gone on to have a family. And my guess would be that they're, you know, that was kind of like their starter home. But I think it all worked out. But I just remember imagining, it's like literally, and also I can't think of, other than taking down a wall, I can't think of something that's more profound to the house. Yeah, right. It isn't even like, I want to paint this trim. And then it's like the deal falls through and someone goes, why is this trim purple? Like the next person to buy it. It's like, you start cutting the floor up. If you've really done something to that house You better get that house at that point

And we're both, you mentioned that Kelly had a wife Now, or has a wife, so do you know Like, was she in on this as well Or, I doubt it

She, her name is Tara, and she's a very level-headed Individual, wow My guess is that this was a rogue mission From our very Quirky friend, Kelly Ask Camaro about it next time you're at the Mother Aerie, ask her about Kelly Cutting up the floors in his house That he didn't actually own yet oh my god that makes me tense that makes me tense this happened decades ago and it's making me you'll never meet exactly you'll you'll be lying in bed stressing about it tonight and that my friend is a gift that i'm happy to thank you appreciate it on this tuesday all right that's gonna do it for today's show but we've We've got another episode for all of you coming your way tomorrow, so please do join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Tuesday. Take care of yourselves. You know, really pay close attention to the cyber training that you're doing. It may be more complex than you thought it was. I learned that today the hard way. And we will see you tomorrow. Until then, have a great Tuesday, and please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

you know you're overthinking it buddy yeah i mean just kind of see this as a fun thing to do or you make a little bread power out