Muse

Ah, look at that kooky old cookie jar. You like cookie jars, Kenneth? Well, I guess I've never thought about it that much. We had a nice one back home in Georgia. Had a bear on it. I remember when my mom's friend Ron would come over. They'd go into the bedroom to sort out their paperwork, and I'd just go ahead and stare at that cookie jar. It was almost as if I took every problem that I ever had, and I put it inside that cookie jar. And I sealed it up so tight that nothing would never, ever, ever get out. So, I guess to answer your question, I'd give cookie jars about a B.

TBTL!

I'm starting my own podcast. Hey, that could be fun. All right, everybody, who's ready to laugh? Yeah! Yeah! I can't hear you! That's not true, of course, but cheer louder! Yeah! Are you seriously detaining me again? Am I being rendered? No, you're being friendered, so just please accept our compulsory hospitality. If you had a favorite saying, what would it be? Life's a party, rock your body. It stinks!

all right hello good morning and welcome everyone to a tuesday edition of tbtl the show that just might be too beautiful to live it is our turn my name is luke burbank i am your host i won't trash talk i won't be out there blowhard coming to you from the madrona hill studio perched high above the mighty columbia where it is a very rainy windy day here you know you like to get wet We're going to be getting not dry for the next couple of days here, but fortunately, it's relatively warm. And at last check, certainly very dry here inside the broadcast center. As we arrive at episode 4100 in a collector series.

Let the fun begin.

I'm realizing that at the beginning of the show, I've got my little patter, my little spiel, my routine that I do. I don't know if I mentioned that I'm in the Madrona Hill studio perched high above the Mighty Columbia. I think I did, but it's like that experience when you realize that you drove somewhere and you have no conscious memory of stopping at any stop signs or traffic lights. You have to assume you did because you're not being followed by three to four police officers, but you don't remember doing it. I don't remember saying the typical top of the show thing, but I'm going to have to. assume that I did say the thing I'm supposed to say. If I seem a little frazzled this morning, it's because I'm still vibrating from that Monday night football game last night between the Seattle Seahawks and the Philadelphia Eagles. My goodness. You gotta be a real football nerd to sit through the whole thing. That was really something. Really something. And I say this with peace and love to our fans of our show who are also fans of the Philadelphia Eagles. I will say this, The Philadelphia Eagles are my second team. That's where, not to brag, I was conceived, which, of course, I had a lot to do with. My conception in Philadelphia, PA. I've got a lot of family there. Special place for me. So peace and love to our friends in Philly who are bummed. But, man, what a game. Speaking of people I love from Philadelphia, my mother was wearing a DK Metcalf jersey while watching the game yesterday that I bought her. But I don't know if she knows that I bought her the jersey. And I don't know if that really matters. I'll say, what's up, dog? We'll get into that. Plus, I am getting ready to take a long trip to Germany on Christmas and then back from Germany. And I'll be dealing with all of the various things that go on in airports, including that moment when everybody gets up and stands around the entrance to the gateway, regardless of when it is it's their time to board I would say can you please stop doing this stuff there is some science now behind why we tend to do that and actually a kind of an explanation which I think is interesting to talk about so we will talk about that and so much more with this young man the longest running Cobra of the show may be best known for his depictions of the tall ships he's

also pretty stoked on this tuesday morning and here he is having the time of his life

he's andrew walsh and he's joining me right now good morning my friend good morning luke i took a long breath there because i could hear my microphone was acting up i take it you can hear me okay i hear you but i was getting a little it sounded weird a little a little dust in the machine dust in the machine that was the song the band kansas wrote about your mixer yeah i know kansas This has written a lot of songs about I mean, it's just that nobody listens to Kansas.

If you start thinking that, I'm going to put you on a 5150.

Is that a Kansas reference?

No, that's a reference to you thinking that bands are writing songs about you. I don't want to be glib about mental health, but I did have a friend who started telling me about the fact that Ariana Grande. Well, this person, she texted me. She said, I finally met someone. And I was like, oh, that's amazing. I'm like so stoked for you. And I said, who is it? And then she sent me a photo of Ariana Grande, and I was like, oh, yeah, lol, so who is it? And she said, no, it's Ariana Grande. She's speaking to me through the music. And then later, at a different time, explained to me that Taylor Swift and Ariana Grande were fighting over her through their music. Wow. And that Jay-Z had, all of Jay-Z's music was actually ripped off from a website that she had been keeping, which I pointed out to her she had started the website well after the particular albums by Jay-Z were released but that didn't in that moment carry a lot of weight anyway if you were thinking and I think that friend of mine is actually doing a lot better now that's really chilling it was a new experience for me and again I'm not mental health is such a real and serious thing in this country and I know that we've all had experiences, either ourselves or with people we love who've gone through stuff. So I really am not trying to play this for a joke, but it was, I hadn't been through that particular journey with someone I was friends with. In other words, you kind of, you might know of someone who's dealing with stuff. You might, there might be a family member of a friend of yours, but it was, it was something I hadn't personally experienced before where I thought we were having one kind of conversation and then it became clear to me at some point that what we were talking about was

very much not based in reality. Yeah and it's somebody that at first your reaction was just oh yeah we're just goofing around here so it's not even like somebody who you know maybe you're friends with and you kind of realize that sometimes they feel like they're on the edge a little bit so you're like maybe wary of this kind of conversation it just was like you just thought you're having a normal conversation like you'd had many times before and then suddenly you realize

oh this isn't a normal conversation we had had conversations before that now looking back I realized we're sort of kind of indicators that something was starting to happen one time a song came on we were hanging out a song came on by Avicii which is he was like a DJ kind of like an electro DJ guy and I said something about Avicii and she said don't even bring him up because and I I said, oh, sorry, that's, and my thinking was like, that's an odd response to the music of Avicii, and she was like, yeah, I don't, I can't even, I don't even want to get into it, I can't even get into it with you right now, and what I realize now is that she was also thinking this sort of connection was happening with this DJ, Avicii. At the time, she didn't elaborate, but then later, you know, months later, when the other stuff came up, I was like, oh, this is a way that this is playing out. It turns out that's actually not uncommon for people that are dealing with that particular are kind of mental health stuff, which is a feeling that people in the pop culture are communicating with you or are interacting with you in some way, you know, that's clearly not happening. So I need you to tell me officially you don't think Kansas is writing music about you, Andrew.

That I do realize that me saying that now really triggered something of all the things for me to say. All right. Although I think you might have set that up.

I actually did. I totally did. I was just singing a play on the song Dust in the Wind by Kansas because your mic wasn't working. But I have great news for you, Andrew. Your mic appears to be working again.

My mental illness is I don't think Kansas really exists because I can't even think of it. The state or the band? I can't even. Well, I'm pretty sure the state exists, although I haven't been there. But I can't name one Kansas song.

Well, how about Dust in the Wind?

I guess you did mention that. I'm trying to think of Dust in the Wind. Carry On My Wayward Son. Okay, Carry On My Wayward Son. I can hear that in my head. Dust in the Wind, I feel like I only hear that as a punchline, but I can't even, I can't imagine, you know, I can't picture the song right now.

I promise you there's a, oh my, are you kidding me? I'm trying to play Dust in the Wind from Spotify. I guess I've never used Spotify on this still relatively new computer for me, so here we go. I can promise you.

Carry On My Wayward Son. There'll be peace when you are done. Yeah, I know that very well. So that's Kansas, huh?

That's Kansas

I swear to God You ask me tomorrow Who sings this song And I'll say I don't know It's one of those You'll say Nebraska Yeah Or America There are a whole bunch Of bands from this era That are named after locations And I can't keep them straight Chicago I'm not even joking Chicago, Kansas, America I don't know the difference Between these bands

I like that America was like You know what

We're going to encompass this whole mother trucker. You know what? Forget this. We don't care. We're not about one specific state or geography. We are doing the whole damn thing. And by the way, this includes Alaska and Hawaii.

Are you familiar with my favorite band, Western Hemisphere? They went big. They didn't go home.

I tried to start a band called The Americas, which was going to encompass both Canada and Central and South America, too. I thought that would be kind of like when my sister Rachel came up with the idea for Six Hour Energy Drink.

Right.

I just thought, well, America is a pretty popular band. What about The Americas? Right.

No, I like that. I like that a lot.

That was one heck of a football game last night, my friend.

It really was, man. I disengaged emotionally. Or if you were one of the young people, you'd say you dissociated. I dissociated. I really did. Like, I'm trying. I've been thinking about this for about 12 hours now. I did something during the final comeback drive by the Seahawks. And if you don't follow sports, that's about all you need to know is the Seahawks were losing most of the game. We didn't go into it with I didn't go into it with a lot of confidence. Nor did I playing the Eagles. You did claim yesterday on the show that the Seahawks would best.

Can I get a witness? Can I get the quietest desk bell of all time, Andrew? Sorry, that was me fading out the music of Kansas. Can I get the loudest desk bell of all time on the fact that I did end yesterday's show by saying I had a weird sneaking suspicion that the Seahawks might surprise some people? Now, as I told you later, when I sent you over 1,000 text messages to the game, I always think they're going to win. So that's not really I can't take a lot of credit for that, but I am glad that that did prove out.

yeah absolutely also it's so funny that you were apologetic in your texting because i sent you like i sent you a five text multi-part question yesterday i i just think that like i was getting text messages from people all over the place like all around the country are you watching this game our buddy hauser was like i need to be around people right now he was just like i just

like there was an energy televisions chris hayes was oh that's right he was texting with each and

every moment i feel like yeah i don't think anybody has to apologize for texting behavior after last night except for one person in our text chain but we can talk about that can i just say

could i may i just say that was really that was amazing i i i'll let you finish and then i'll try to i'll try to sort of uh what's the word i'm like i'm trying to geofence two minutes on that

text you're referring to but i'll let you yeah we're yeah i've already brought up like 17 different things but yeah the the texting being in love with the seahawks means never having to say you're Sorry for your texts. That's also a song by America, I believe. And what I was going to say was I've gone into a lot of painful, painful detail on the show about my various loyalties to teams and how they manifest emotionally in me. And when I was rooting for the Browns, there was something very especially painful about them because they just seemed like their entire as long as I knew the Browns, they were always snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Right. There's something always ironic. Like, you're always ready for the bottom to fall out on them. And then at the same time I was watching them, I was watching the Russell Wilson Seahawks, where I always believe. Exact opposite. Exactly. There's like, oh, we're down by three touchdowns and there's only 15 seconds. I think Russell will figure this out. Yeah, right. It was just this mentality I had. And even when it didn't play out, I didn't regret it. It was like it was fun having those two different, that dichotomy, right? But the modern day Seahawks are very different. The Browns are out of my life. And now they win all the time. I'm always dismayed when I open up the paper and see that they've won. Why am I reading in the newspaper? I don't know. But then with the Seahawks, this season I kind of have low expectations for them. I don't feel like it's like, oh, just part of this. And we'll get to this in a second when we talk about the text chain. You know, we have a friend who just always feels like the underdog and like the sky is completely falling. I think the Seahawks are just kind of in this transitionary season. We aren't we're so used to going to the playoffs every single year. It's just become like an expectation of this of this fan base. And it's like this isn't going to be that year. We're not that good. We're trying to figure some things out. There's you know, whatever, like I'm not freaking out about it. I'm not living and dying on every play. But with last night's game getting very, very close by the end and then seeing that our backup quarterback could take us down the field and, you know, and defy the expectations that he set the rest of the game he wasn't terrible but like i didn't see this spark in him throughout most of the game for him to have this just miracle comeback drive at the end of the game i was and i i hate to say this because i feel like you're going to be disappointed in me what was maybe there was like a minute 15 on the clock during this drive i was like I just didn't expect it to happen, so I didn't get into it. You know, usually I'd stand up. I'd pace. I'd be like every breath. And I was like scrolling through the Seattle Times on my phone. I'm not joking. I was just sort of like looking at headlines.

I was clearing the dishes, Andrew.

Yeah, I was almost like looking through my fingers, but that's not even quite – I like disassociated. Like you said, I was like, this isn't going to happen. It's just going to be a disappointment. I'm not going to let this happen to myself. I'm not going to get my hopes up because –

It's like when I'm playing roulette and the ball, there are some people when you play roulette, when the ball, they're staring at where the ball goes into which little number, right? But the first four numbers it goes into, it never stays there. In the history of roulette, the ball has never just like dropped into a little box and then stayed there. So I find the watching of it bouncing around to be agonizing. So when the ball starts to go into that little thing, I look away. I avert my gaze. I just want to know the outcome. and that's kind of exactly what I think you were doing last night and to a degree it's what I was doing because I had the exact same feeling I was like this the I would love to see and somebody's run this some AI program somewhere what's the new one what's it called Ruby or Scarlet or something oh I don't know I think there's a new one out what one of the AI programs could tell you right now what the actual chance is based on Drew Locke's entire career that was the person that was playing quarterback for the Seahawks based on his career based on how the Seahawks were doing based on the philadelphia based on a whole bunch of data points some program could tell you what the chances of that happening were and they had to be under five percent based on all of the things that we know or that can be known and so i was with you i was i was clearing the dinner uh and dinner tables really it's really a stretch there's a tiny outdoor like it's for like putting on your patio table that's in the one room with heat in my house that me and my dad sit at and eat our dinner each night. And it's behind the couch, which is in front of the TV. So I was clearing off from this like outdoor furniture table that we use the stuff and kind of going in and out of the kitchen as a way of also sort of emotionally protecting myself until probably the DK Metcalf catch, which went for like 35 yards or something. And that was when we were all of a sudden, like within the range of where it was now maybe theoretically possible that this might happen. Even so, that's still a huge long shot at that moment based on all of the stuff that's going on. And I'm with you, even though I said yesterday before at the end of TBTL, I could see the Seahawks surprising some people. Even though I said that when we got that ball with like a minute 15 or whatever it was, and we had what, 90 yards to go? It might've been 92 yards. I think we might've even been on our own eight yard line. I didn't believe Andrew. I did not, I was not a Lefevre believer. I didn't have, I wasn't, I wasn't, I didn't have any Soto Mojo. I was just like kind of checked out. And then when it actually happened, when Jackson Smith and Jigba caught that ball, I will tell you my dad and I gave each other possibly the worst high five in human history. And that was cause I wasn't prepared. I had done no, I had done none of the preparation for giving a good high five because that's how much I wasn't expecting us to win.

And let's be honest, my dad is a man of many talents, high fiving, not one of them. He sort of put one and a half hands up. I don't even, I didn't even know what to do with that. He's sitting on the couch. I've got like a plate of penne, partially consumed penne pasta in one hand. I put the plate down. We kind of go, it was a mess, but I was so, I was just, and then, and that's not, to get too much into the footballismism of this but then there was still 26 seconds left and i didn't want to be i didn't want to be the person who i had muted one minute into the game but i was like this is way too much time with three timeouts and maybe that's maybe that's where these seahawks have gotten me with this season where they've definitely struggled at times and they're not that peak russell wilson era we always find away team i started to think this is way way way too much time for a very good philadelphia offense with three timeouts and they're gonna i started thinking we'll be lucky if we hold them to a field goal and then if we do that now we go into overtime and like i don't like our chances like you know we're this team the eagles went to the super bowl last year like i don't like our chances in an overtime environment like what just happened what the seahawks just did is a one in a 10 000 kind of moment i don't like our chances of just grinding out the game in overtime and winning so i started to go even though this amazing thing had happened i started to go into this kind of like dark place of like oh god what are they going to do how are they going to mess this up and then when that interception happened.

I think you sent me a puke emoji around this time.

I sent it to you and Christopher.

That's right. It was two green emoji pukers. Yeah, you said 30 seconds is too much time. Puke, puke. I really felt that way. Just to verify for the audience. I felt queasy. This is truly how you were feeling at the time.

I felt queasy. And to be honest with you, and now I'm really getting X's and O's on it, and I apologize. But the decision to throw that ball all the way down the field where I mean where the Seahawks ultimately intercepted it based on that exact position on the field was kind of questionable because the Eagles had actually managed to get to within about 15 yards of where their field goal kicker could reasonably hit a field goal and so you know I was expecting them to just throw the ball underneath and do you know they had still two timeouts left like they could have just I think they could have systematically just moved down the field and gotten it to the 30 and kicked a field goal. That was well within their ability at that point with that amount of time remaining with the timeouts they had. So I was just, I felt, and then there's the whole, you know, instant replay review, and now it felt like there was about five moments where I thought, well, this is the Seahawks season. It was when we got the ball to start that final, well, no, it started before that. It was us trying to stop them when we were on defense. I was like, well, this is the Seahawks season. If we don't stop them here, if they get a first down, they run the clock out then it was like we got the ball back and i was like well this is the seahawks season and then it's like we're on the third i'm like well this is the seahawks season and then philadelphia gets the ball back and they're driving and i'm like well this is the seahawks season and then there's the instant replay on the interception well this right here my friends this is the seahawks season so i i was i was pretty even though i was trying to maintain some remove from the whole the whole thing i was also still just like kind of an on an emotional

roller coaster which brings us to i mean i guess we'll just talk about this too because i think this might be interesting although i do want to be i am yeah let's be i'm not i'm not going to

yeah i'm with you i don't i don't want to i don't want to call anyone out or call anyone in too hard

on this but i am protective of my friend who is on our text chain and i think we've already identified him but i'll just pretend we haven't um and he's always the negative one right and i think there's a reason for that his sports fandom he's not a browns fan but it was i i when i was a browns fan i had a lot to um i saw eye to eye with him on a lot of things so sometimes you can just have this feeling like no matter what your team is going to screw up now he's been a seahawks fan for a long time so he's enjoyed the the spoils of those victories but in in other aspects of his life and he is always the first one to go pretty negative on a text chain like back in the day because here's the deal i feel like back in the day he would put something on the text chain maybe mid-game that was kind of negative and then maybe it'd be another one and then i i would for the longest time feel like you were overreacting i'm just going to be straightforward and you'd be like i'm blocking you or whatever and i'm just like listen i didn't actually let me just clarify one

thing number one yes you're right i have definitely in the years over the years i've overreacted due to anger management issues and extreme alcohol consumption. I don't think I've ever said I'm blocking you.

Or not block or mute. No, you know, you have. You have. Really?

I've said that. I've done it, but I didn't know I was saying it.

In your text last night, you even said, I'm muting you again. I think you've sort of said that.

I don't know if that person knew I had them muted because there have been times when you've had to remind me, hey, do you still have this person muted? No, I know it is.

You've just forgotten because he said to me before, like, hey, do you know, does Luke still have me muted? because i've been emailing him or texting him about something else and he's oh okay okay yeah we've had that conversation i've told you that too so it's an you know it's not in fact after you muted him last night he just wrote fair enough like he doesn't he doesn't take it personally i didn't see that but i will say this like this is a friend who i mean potentially could hear this

although i don't really know but uh i love this person by the way i just want to say that like this is the one peculiarity in our relationship where we just kind of don't don't totally mesh

But I have always sort of defended him because, first of all, I believe in a good dollop of negativity every now and then so that fate will then make a fool out of you. Like, I kind of like putting stuff on the I don't do this often. I don't like to be a negative texter, but there have been times I'm so furious at the Mariners that I'll, you know, text something very negative about a single player or a situation and then it immediately turns around and I look like a buffoon. And that's fine because I will take that buffoonery charge as long as it means a victory for my team, right? So, like, I believe in some of this juju. And so my point here is at some point I started to see it more and more that it seems like the negativity has been ratcheted up, like, over the course of the past couple of seasons of both baseball and football to a degree where I am now not sure if I was.

seeing clearly before or if this person is getting way more negative with way more frequency and way earlier in the game and this is where i'll stop babbling is it was yesterday i believe before the very first snap i wasn't i couldn't watch the very very beginning of the game but i'm pretty sure it was like 5 14 i don't even think the game i have i have the time stamp it was 5 16 which is 5 16

allegedly it's one minute after the posted kickoff but i don't know if they kicked off at exactly 5 15 when you looked at the internet because yesterday actually was literally like what time i know it's monday night football like when do they really do it and it was listed at 5 15 west coast time and i noted that this text in question came in at 5 16 so i don't know if they'd actually

kicked it yet but it was right around the start of the game maybe maybe they kicked it but certainly like no real play had happened yet and there's basically a text that just said oh no gino not our starting quarterback no Gino no bueno no good we're losing this and it was like this game hasn't even begun yet and also you're the person who for the first half of the season kept saying pull Gino drew lock time like I was just sort of like you're also contradicting everything I thought you believed in I don't know it was just like it didn't it was just pure out of the gate just unadulterated uncut negativity blackness and i was just like yeah that's i understand like i've never wanted to mute this person i never understood your reaction to them and i can't tell if i'm changing or if they're changing if we're all changing but i was like i understand why that would be an unfun i mean i i didn't mute him but i could understand like yeah that that's a bummer That's a bummer vibe to watch to start a game with, you know, commiserate later, find ways to commiserate later when things have really gone south. But come on, can we can we get one goddamn snap off?

I want to on this subject, I want to start by saying there's a lot of hypocrisy for me around this topic because I am very regularly both in baseball and football season, probably more so in baseball season though just like leveling unhinged allegations against players coaches fan bases you name it like i can get very very negative myself it's not like i am just pure positivity and light in these text chains so that's part that's that's a major hypocrisy for me because it's like if i'm gonna it's like i want everyone to be negative just in the way that i'm negative and just when i feel like negativity is warranted which is a completely unfair standard so like i want to just be clear about that like this doesn't really it's not consistent from me but i guess i would say i we all process it differently and like the way that this friend of ours processes it it processes his stress about these teams it's so it it feels so unfun to me in these text chains because it isn't like ah like for instance my brother sam will like jamal adams when i was when i was hosting livewire i read these texts on the show but i was like hosting livewire and the the team was playing a thursday night football game and i'm just seeing these like kind of slightly cryptic texts from everyone and it's like my brother sam going like great coverage jamal like that to me okay that's negative but that's that feels and again i'm saying this is my own completely inconsistent kind of like system for this stuff but that to me feels like normal football chatter or like you know we got to get jamal out of there he's killing us like that that all feels like football talk going end of an era or going no gino no spoon that was a witherspoon reference no bueno no win like there's a to me there's a way of just being like we're we're on this boat that's going down and one to me one way of saying is like we gotta plug that hole over there this boat is going down that's useful negativity going we're all gonna die that's not useful negativity to me this is just again my own system so that's that's kind of why that that statement right before anything meaningful had happened was like and again i know exactly what's going on this is a person who again who i absolutely love in the world and and love being around but like they just feel a lot of strong feelings about these teams the way we all do and that kind of emotion gets channeled into a certain kind of thing just like mine gets channeled into whatever it gets channeled into so i i'm not going to say that the seahawks winning was mostly important because it proved that text incorrect at 5 16 but it wasn't it wasn't unrelated to my sheer delirium when the game was actually over i it really was in my mind like these guys gotta win so that text looks as as as sort of ridiculous because because if they lose i was also like rehearsing you know we we played very badly for parts of the the game and made a lot of mistakes and Pete Carroll looked like our coach,

Pete Carroll looked like he was confused about some of the most basic elements of NFL football. I was, I was. shadow boxing with that text from 5 5 16 going like okay fine we are going to lose this game but that still wasn't helpful or whatever you know what i mean i was like going through i was working my progression much like drew lock was working his progression andrew i was working my progression of that text message of being like okay it was no bueno okay we did lose but but but this that and then when we got to the point where there was like a chance we might actually pull this off i was like god this is going to be the sweetest sweetest outcome based on that

negativity what i was obsessed with text wise was a mistake i put in a text message to you after the game as we were doing our uh i think 11 30 p.m post game analysis via the text chains of course this was just a one-on-one we we were we sidebarred this um we went to a breakout room we were doing the weirdest thing which is i was emailing you and texting you about the game while we probably also had some lingering conversations going on on other text chains that you and i are right but i mean

you and i were using two communication channels for like no reason because i had oh i had sent you some recordings that we needed and then you had respond but i had made a seahawks joke in there and then you had responded with a joke and a link to the drew lock press conference so we just had dual communication i'm sitting in bed texting you and emailing you at 11 o'clock at night right

Exactly. But I had a whole theory about this feeling like another era of Seahawks-dom, and I wrote 2012, and I meant 2010. I don't know if you picked up on that or not, but 2012 would have been the year, I think, that we had Russell and everything. But I meant that little period when it was right before Tavares Jackson, and it was Hasselbeck, right? It was just like this era when we knew Hasselbeck was going away, and I was very new to football at the time, so I could be totally wrong about this, but, like, the Seahawks sort of showing this glimmer of weird hope on Monday night football during a time of uncertainty, but certainly also during a time where you have some real talent on the team, too, and maybe I was just feeling very optimistic, but, like, I'm not super optimistic about this season. And we've seen who this team is, but like there was something about last night and maybe it was just like, you know, just hearing from so many people, Seahawks fans and otherwise just like blowing up the phone. Like those are always fun sports moments, right? When you know something big is going on, when people are contacting you from all over the place. I love that feeling. And so maybe I was just feeling a little bit heady about it. But I was like, what if we're in, you know, what if we're in 2010 mode again, which isn't the best place to be. But you know what that means? It means 2014 is right around the corner.

Right. And all you want as a sports, well, I don't know what all sports fans want. I don't speak for all of them. But it's just nice to get one kind of memorable, I'll tell you what, even our friend Matt Calkins got, I thought, a good one in the Seattle Times last night. Because that's the other thing I was doing, Edge. It was just like, when your team wins a game that's really unexpected like this, I just go into like, I must compile all of the information related to this event. So I'm reading like as the Seattle Times, you know, game story and columns are coming in. I'm like refreshing. I'm reading everything they're saying. And Matt Culkin said something like Drew Locke just became part of Seattle lore with that game. And I totally agree.

Yeah, this is a moment we'll all remember.

And you're talking about that, you know, that run by Marshawn Lynch, which is called the Beastquake run famously. Like the Seahawks did not win the Super Bowl that year. every year only one team gets to win the super bowl every other team ultimately their season ended in disappointment that's the for most for for most of the teams that's what happens if you get a couple of crazy moments along the way if you get a beast quake here and there if you get a a drew lock to jackson smith and jigba like that's you hang on to that i mean again this is sad this is sad to say if you if you're not a football fan or if you are a person with eyes and a brain and a sense of how bad the nfl is for most of the people involved i don't know why i'm giving this full-throated kind of emotional defense of this place but like if you get a few of those in you know over the course of a decade you hang on to them it's like the fun part of being of going through this whole misery that is being a sports fan yeah absolutely

and i think last night and again it had you know we went on this whole me especially rambly thing about the text chain but like again it's all part of the same fabric of last night that also just sort of makes it all sort of special as well like i was not like i as you know i had like a little meeting right as the game was starting so i was like oh i would like to watch this game but we're probably gonna you know in my head i was like we're probably gonna lose it and i'm just not gonna i'm not gonna get super invested in this um but you know then once my meeting was over i watched like the last three quarters of the game and like you know enjoyed it but just i can't explain it just never, never really was like on pins and needles. Yeah, you couldn't give yourself over. Yeah, I couldn't get myself over. And so I was like, whatever. And then for it to end up being the type of night that, you know, we will probably talk about for a really long time when we talk about sports, even though I was just, you know, watching the game at home by myself. But it didn't feel like I was by myself because of all of the conversation that was going on. I love listen I love watching football in 2023 because you can have this kind of communication going on you know like I'm sure uh you know I I don't know for sure but I hear people enjoyed um football in the 80s and 90s as well I don't could somebody look that up did people enjoy the NFL football in the 80s and not as much and not properly not as much and not properly but um I I every now and then you got to remind yourself hey it's kind of cool living in the

future it is you can mute your friends exactly you can get a text from your girlfriend that your mom sent her of your mom in a dk metcalf jersey that you bought her and gave her for christmas but she because so becca wrapped all of the presents that i got for various family members because um she had wrapping paper and frankly she's just better at that than i am and and wrote you know the little two whomever on there it was a really sweet thing of her and it really helped me out um but i think that the un the unintended consequence because we did a big christmas thing at my sister hannah's on sunday the unintended consequence was i don't think my mother understands that i was the one who gave her i think she thinks that my girlfriend gave her a 175 dk metcalf official nfl jersey which would be a really nice thing from her son's girlfriend but

would be kind of weird i misunderstood i thought you meant she just didn't remember where she got it at all she knew it came from your corner of the family but she knew it came from your girlfriend

she well because she didn't say one thing to me on sunday about it which i thought was kind of interesting i was like man you know because my mom is you know really obsessed with with the seahawks and like loves the idea of having the official apparel on and these things are not cheap As I just mentioned These things are not cheap And so my mom's not the kind of person Who's going to buy an official jersey She might have a t-shirt She'll pick up a Mariners shirt From a garage sale It was like one of the shirts They gave the first 15,000 people at the field And she'll be wearing it when the Mariners are doing well She loves this stuff And I just thought, I saw this jersey And I thought, you know what, this will be something That she'll really love Also they didn't have Tyler Lockett If they did I would have gotten her Lockett up Lockett But I but she likes DK enough. And I got it for her. And I have to be honest with you. I try not to give gifts with this in mind. Like I'm I generally speaking, do not give gifts with an expectation of what the response will be. Because I don't like that when people do that to me. Like, I think if you're going to give someone something, you give it to them. You don't give it to them so that they'll say, oh, my God, thank you for giving me this. But I will admit that some little thing in the back of my head thought, man, she's going to love this. She's never had a legit NFL Jersey like this. That's the full on deal. And I was a little surprised that she didn't say anything about it to me. And then on a Monday, yesterday, Becca texted me a picture of my mom in the Jersey. And I go, what is that? She goes, I don't know. She texted me this picture of her in the Jersey. And I think she's, you know, I think that, I don't know if she knows where the jersey came from. And also, it doesn't really matter. I should just be like, I'll tell you what I'm not gonna do. I'm not gonna send her a text going, hey, by the way, you know I gave you that. It's like, fine, she's got it on, she's enjoying it. It doesn't really matter, but it is, I'm surprised that this is how it all shook out.

Becca told me specifically that she bought the jersey for your mom, though.

I've got the receipts, Andrew, literally and figuratively. So I will happily verify and correct the record on that. But anyway, it was a heck of a game. Again, peace and love to the Eagles fans. I can tell you this. The Eagles are going to go much further this season than the Seahawks are. So if you're in Philadelphia listening to this or if you are a Philly fan and your heart is hurting today, the arc of NFL future is long, but it bends towards the Eagles more so than the Seahawks this year. But we also, one last thing.

I mean, and again, I was gonna say, and the Phillies as well. Like, I really like Philadelphia. I haven't spent a lot of time there, but I just, I like everything that I know of Philadelphia, and I know you like listener Maggie and Swarthmore and everything. I know that we have a lot of, we have a lot of Philly listeners who love their teams, and I have no animus towards those teams either. Having said that, you're not scrounging around for good feelings regarding your sports teams like, you know, like somebody digging around in an ashtray looking for an old butt to smoke. Like you guys have had a lot of pretty sweet, I would say, major. your sporting victories recently although if you talk to my philly fam as we call them if you talk to my uncle johnny my cousins mike and timmy they will just tell you that it's been nothing but unmitigated misery as a philadelphia sports fan and guess who else would tell you that people in boston yeah and people in seattle that's sports people in chicago it's the strangest thing how we all think that we've all had everyone thinks they are the most long-suffering fan base right um and we can't all be the most long the long most long-suffering fan base is obviously the chicago bears fan base that's it it's not even close since the 1985 refrigerator perry super bowl shuffle years our poor chicago bears fans have been in a living nightmare and i think i might have to elevate chicago to my new second favorite team mostly because you know our friend chris hayes uh is is a bears a long-suffering bears fans a fan and he he he could

really use a win here yeah i'm trying to think there are a lot of i have a lot of secondary and tertiary teams and especially now i feel like i mean it's weird i was telling you and chris a long time ago via text message that i consider baker mayfield to be like a one-man diaspora of the browns that i used to love so like culturally cleveland he's cold so like he's down there in in tampa bay doing well and i'm rooting for him for some reason my it's funny and also just like like with various teams like i just get vibes i'm like yeah i like the vibe of this team you know and it's sort of like that's why you know i love the twins now that has to do with our friendship with the stew bod and a lot of our friends in the twin cities but it's funny how i just have like certain teams i just i'm just like no i'm i'm good with them and there's other teams that i i feel like well if i ever met you in a dark alley i'd probably run away because i'm a scaredy cat but

i'd glower at you first yes i'm i'm just happen to be on the beast quake wikipedia page so the run that marshawn lynch did that's been called the beast quake against the new orleans saints and what i love about you just saying it's an interesting time to be alive as a sports fan with the technology is someone has created a graphic that charts exactly the path that marshawn lynch took to get from like the 32 yard line to the end zone it's just amazing like it never occurred to me that someone would sit down and actually go like okay and at the 40 he was here but then he goes along here it's like a broken line little illustration you know what it's like family circus i was gonna say it's like family circus somebody should make it a family circus with marshawn he just he goes uh he goes over the swing set but he doesn't actually play

on the swings he just goes over the swing did he make a major did he make a rude gesture after

that one i know well it depends on your well he jumped he jumped yeah he jumped into the end zone

backwards while grabbing his own cross okay that was yeah i don't know i mean was that that would

have been an illegal celebration penalty probably now oh yeah for real i'm surprised it wasn't then in fact it was it was a different time andrew the 80s okay uh we should thank some donors let's do that. Hey, just a quick reminder about all of the important, entertaining, and amazing stuff that's happening over at Terrible Thanks for Asking. Of course, that's the podcast hosted by our friend Nora McInerney. Terrible Thanks for Asking is such an incredible thing because if you're feeling great, there's a lot there for you. If you're feeling not so great, there's also a lot over there for you to check out. Of course, Nora also hosts It's Going to Be Okay. She's also in charge of the terrible reading club and she's written all kinds of books including the national bestseller bad vibes only we love nora you love nora we're just reminding you to go hang out in the terrible thanks for asking universe right now wherever you get your podcasts

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes

It is time to thank some donors These are the incredible, generous folks None of whom appear to be from Philadelphia today Which really helps Sklaroff is going to go We just, we had 12 people end their sustaining support of TBTL, and we've traced them all back to the Keystone State.

I mean, that's okay. Like, listen.

Listen, no. We won the game. I have no animosity towards the Eagles. No, none at all. None at all. I also have no animosity towards Kara Tillman of Austin, Texas. In fact, I have nothing but positivity.

Oh. Okay. Well, Kara and I, we have our kind of things, but we're working on it. It's going to be fine. I definitely appreciate Kara supporting the show, though, while we do kind of work out our personal differences.

I consider that an olive branch from Kara.

And I appreciate it.

it and i'm taking that branch thank you lisa belonger from nina wisconsin nina wisconsin that's a cool sounding town it really is in a cool state where that is i don't think i've ever seen that is that near the dells the wisconsin dells i was talking becca was saying we're talking about being in wisconsin she goes i think i've only been there once and it was at the wisconsin dells and i go what were you doing there she goes uh we were seeing rage against the machine oh really and And there's something about Rage Against the Machine playing the Wisconsin Dells, which by the way, for folks that don't know, it's kind of like, it's sort of like Branson minus all of the musical reviews. It's this part of Wisconsin that's just these giant water parks and family style hotels and kind of highly synthetic but fun for kids like activities. People love to go there. It's a fun place. It's definitely like I said, it's highly synthetic, though. It's like it's kind of just it's it's like a flavor blasted Dorito of a place that you can go with your family and do stuff. And the idea that Rage Against the Machine, the sort of anti-capitalist, you know, like anti-everything that we think of as the like the dominant structures of this country, that they're playing the Wisconsin Dells. I love it. Yeah, the Dells are often described as the machine.

Right. that's where some of the confusion comes from

yeah F you I won't dell what you tell me that didn't really work I also I'm actually pretty sketchy on the music of Rage Against the Machine whatever they're like that whatever like their most popular song is that Gorilla Radio or something maybe the name of that song I'm just saying whatever like the whatever the top Rage Against the Machine song was that ever came out that was probably on the radio I kind of could bop my head to

Isn't that the one, though, where they say Killing in the Name of, like, FU? Oh, that's one, yeah. I think it's called Killing in the Name of, right?

Yeah, right, okay. Do they have one called Guerrilla Radio, too? I feel like maybe that was the name of an album. If so, I don't know. I'm haze. I haven't been to the Dells in a while, so I haven't had a chance to catch Rage Against the Machine. Thanks also to Lindsay Swanson of Portland, Oregon.

Hey.

Now, that's a city that's more culturally Rage Against the Machine.

They are Raging Against the Machine.

They sure are. Rebecca Pappas is in Seattle, Washington.

Seattle used to rage against the machine, but now the city council has turned over. Yes, don't worry. Businesses are back in charge.

Douglas Hanau is in Brooklyn, New York. It's our friend Doug. Hey, Doug. In Brooklyn. How are you, my friend? Thank you for supporting the program. Thanks for being part of TBTL for all of these years. As has Joe Fulcher been part of this operation for a good while. Joe is in Redmond, Washington, home of a large software concern. that I occasionally do work for at that very same Christmas party where my mother was misunderstanding who spent their hard-earned podcasting money on a DK Metcalf Jersey. I was talking to my cousin Ruthie and her husband, Joe, and they were recounting a conversation that they'd had at a party with somebody who worked for that large software concern that's in Redmond, Washington near where Joe Fulcher is. And that those people were apparently mildly starstruck that Ruthie is my cousin because they had watched the training videos that i oh wow yeah that's uh that's that's micro celebrity for you my friend the most microscopic there is um so i just wanted

to let everybody know expedia's got a pretty big footprint i guess is all yeah i'm learning

that's right i i've only recently that's not true it was probably a couple of years ago it's only been a couple of years since i stopped literally starting every search for airplane tickets and

things on expedia oh i was a velocity guy but the move is by the way this is a pro tip

the move is you search for it on whatever one of those ones you want to use kayak expedia whatever you like you find it and then you go buy it through the actual website of the airline or the hotel because typically now maybe maybe like your travel zoos or your crazy eddies discount ticket warehouse like every once in a while there's some kind of hotel room that's only like the inventory is only like the discounted inventory is parceled out to these websites or i don't think it even happens with the airlines very much anymore but really i'm just this is just i'm unsolicited advice to the travelers in our audience or the future travelers find a good deal on a ticket and then go to the original thing and see if you can get the ticket for the same price because most of the time you can and then you got a lot more options

same thing for rental cars the whole thing yeah i'd made a mistake the last time i traveled i think i went into the process planning on doing that and then out of just like habit just clicking

buy through and they probably friction freed you you know what i mean they just make it they just grease up that entire process so you just next thing you know you've just bought your rental car on what was it called pure oh goodness that was that was slightly

different but uh car i can't remember what it was but yeah some i yeah whatever i got a really really cheap rental and then googled the company after i had already sent them my money and realized that a lot of people were like these people are scammers which i think that's a strong word to use there they did return my money right away without any questions asked but yeah that was

the that was the part of that story i did not see coming was that they totally did what they they said hell yeah i will do what you tell me that's right they did and they're the machine they are coming in hot it is hello and welcome to top story um so as uh i was flying recently out of i sort of alluded to this on yesterday's show but i was flying out of the bob hope airport there andrew i put some respect on its name i was flying out of the bob hope airport in burbank california and um it's a really small airport and so this kind of experience of of when they say okay we're going to start boarding flight 1052 to portland everyone kind of instinctively stands up and goes and just starts standing near where the entry is and and and that's can be sort of an issue because first of all, it actually slows down the process of boarding. And also, you know, 90% of the people that are standing up and now kind of clogging this artery, um, are, are going to be, it's going to be a little while before their group is called. And so there's actually no reason to stand, but there is, according to this article in the Washington post, it was written by Sophia Andrade. Uh, why do gate lice line up early for a flight? Psychologists explain. So first of all, it turns out, Andrew, that the airline industry has a term for the people that are lining up at the gate before it's their turn. They're calling us gate lice.

Yeah, I don't know if I like that term, although I really don't like, I just don't like anybody evoking, evoking, invoking, evoking lice, generally speaking. But that is a practice that I dislike, and it just makes no sense to me. You're clogging everything up and you're just making yourself more anxious, too, by somehow thinking like, I need to I need to be I need good pole position here. I need good pole position. The plane isn't leaving without you. Again, the only thing I know we've talked about this a million times. The only thing is if they're getting low on overhead space, there is a chance that if you wait too long to get on the plane, they might gate check your bag. This has happened to me quite a bit lately. You deal with it. Fine, whatever. But it's not worth the getting up and clogging the area where people are trying to board while you, like, shift from one foot to the other, one foot to the other, hoping that, you know, this family from Nebraska doesn't get in front of you. That way lies madness. Chill. Be the cool person sitting in the chair just watching everybody line up. And then when they call your little letter, then you can get on the plane. I mean, you and I have very different flying experiences, of course. I'm usually the last guy on the plane. You're probably usually one of the first.

Well, I've kind of come around, I mean, in a less judgy way than you just put it, of course, I've kind of come around to what you're saying, which is I've actually started checking, unless I have a crazy tight connection, like I have started actually checking my bags because it is a huge relief to just get on the airplane with like one small computer bag and not be jockeying for that overhead space. there's a couple things going on here they talked to shira gabriel who's a psychology professor at the university um at buffalo they say the university at buffalo but i'm guessing it's the university of buffalo i don't know man universities are weird the university at buffalo okay we're gonna go with the washington post on this one i'm double checking for you okay uh shira gabriel basically says people use other people as sources of information both about what the right thing to do is and about what everyone else is doing and i can absolutely relate to this we even though we no longer live out on the you know serengeti or whatever we like we still have i think this herd mentality where if i promise you that like if enough people if like if you could do this as an experiment although why would you if you and like your five friends got up really quickly and went and stood by the gate other people would start doing it because that instinct is the same thing that when we were out there in the wild was like somebody got up and started running and you were like i better run too because there's probably a saber-toothed tiger around here we get a lot of our information from how other people are behaving and when people start lining up it's really hard it's almost physically hard for me to not be like on edge like okay i guess we're lining up here's what we're doing well or go this is a little bit

different this is a little bit cheating but like just go somewhere kind of public and start staring up at something everybody was staring at something yeah and then everybody will start but you know what i mean like if you're like staring up at something people will start staring up like what's he looking at next thing you know you get a big group of people who are all staring up at nothing

right we'll try that too uh and then stare out into the sky and then point and look horrified and then everyone will be like what's going on and gasp um the other thing that uh that this psychologist points out is that our psychology professor points out is that uh because there are limited resources the resource being putting your having a place to put your overhead bag the airlines because they continue to deliver subpar service and make our lives worse and worse they have created a system that's kind of perfectly designed to make people want to be gate lice because like she points out that like if you're in group seven and you're you're probably they're going to probably take your bag away from you but maybe if you're the first person or the first family in group seven to board you might get your bags on you might be the last people allowed to get your bags on the plane versus them taking them away from you and so there is a real scarcity thing here uh and and so it's not i guess it's it's annoying to see people kind of queuing up when it's not their turn but it's understandable because there is this thing which is can i bring my luggage with me and not be afraid that it will be lost and also not have to wait for it to come off the thing etc and literally like the where you are in the line and where you are in your group in the line could affect that outcome and that's a recipe for making

people act kind of nutty let me ask you a question and then i might dismiss your answer but typical In all seriousness, when you're, let's say, an average day at an airport, like you're somebody who flies way more than the average American. I don't know if I fly about as much or slightly less than the average American. I feel like probably on average. Everything is a little bit weird.

I think you're pretty average with that.

Yeah. I mean, I think things got a little bit weird. I feel like I was flying a little bit more before the pandemic and then everything sort of slowed down. But, you know, like, let's see. In this past year, I flew to visit some family. I flew back to Ohio to visit other family. Maybe I've gotten on a plane maybe three times this in the calendar year or something. Maybe that's about average.

I'd say that's above average.

You think that's above average?

For a person who doesn't travel for work, I would actually say three times is above average.

Yeah, I guess maybe that's what I was getting at. Like, this is where I want to be a little, because I'm very judgy of those people who clog up the works by, like, kind of milling around the gate, like, when they're still, like, boarding the, you know, the veterans of foreign wars and you have a ticket that says Group F on it, right? You're just like, come on, man, you don't need to be here right now.

But on the other hand, and as a thank you for your service, we would like to ask anyone who is a veteran of the Cola Wars.

You may now board. I can't take it anymore. But anyway, so I guess that is the place where I need to extend a little bit of grace, because even me, I don't fly all that often, but I fly enough that I have my routines and I kind of know what the deal is. And like I try to zip through TSA as fast and efficiently as possible and everything. a lot of people maybe they haven't flown in five years i mean that's reasonable especially in this day and age you know coming out of the pandemic like there are probably a lot of people at any gate in an airport who it's a pretty rare thing for them to be in an airport and so therefore they have a level of maybe just low level anxiety about like not you know not knowing what the entire deal is not being 100 comfortable with it and wanting to make sure that they don't mess up

their trip yes there's a a lot of unknowns right and there are the known unknowns and the unknown as our boy donnie used to talk about is he still alive i'm not trying to be sarcastic is don

rumsfeld i feel like no way he's alive right i'm writing rumsfeld alive and it turns out that's his

most famous record it is uh that was was that alive at budokhan rumsfeld comes alive he died all right i'll take it he died in 2021 i'll accept it yeah um handsome man i have to say my other than the you know other than the the the kind of like unyielding need for uh us dominance of the globe in ways that i think manifestly made other people's and our own lives worse he was a good

looking dude in an older age i mean you just want to objectify that entire administration because Because, like, honestly, not a bad-looking administration.

Who else are we dealing with? Well, George W.

George wasn't bad. No, not bad. Kind of a fit guy. Not bad. You got Condi Rice, you know, war criminal. War criminal, sure. Do I have a slight crush on her? Maybe.

I mean, Cleveland native?

No, not Cleveland native, but a Browns fan. Okay, that was it. I've seen a photo.

of her holding like a Browns helmet because you know wearing a jersey because I would send it to you every goddamn Sunday for five years yeah it's the only picture that matters um was she wearing a Kosar jersey I can't remember the number on it but she grew up a Browns fan because her dad was but it was an Ernest Beiner jersey who I can't remember who else was in uh well Colin Powell um I think

I'd say you know a nice like salt and pepper yeah hairdo I'm down with Colin Powell you broke it

you bought it i love that we're just totally objectifying the bush honestly i'm not usually

into objectifying but if we're gonna do it i say this is the group i'd rather it also i'd rather

talk about i don't know man i know that there are terrible politicians who've done terrible things um and may still grind this country into the dust of history but i'm still not a big fan of like of just the cheap shots of making fun of the way people look and i feel like that's what we usually do and so here just like kind of just like saying oh yeah good looking administration it actually feels more empowering to me than talking about that orange guy you know that's something that

i've kind of i have to admit i've come around on to a bit which is the yeah the idea that the way that we denigrate the people we don't like is to talk about their looks because that's let's just take that off the table for like everyone another one that came up uh a while ago that has released kind of resonated with me was the idea of adult diapers because there was a big thing like trump you know there's these photos and it's like does he looking at you know his pants and his suit and like is there a bulge there and is he wearing diapers and then some people were like hey you know what that's that's a thing that many people avail themselves of in adult life for a variety of reasons and the idea that that's a slam on someone that's like saying like what is he in a wheelchair it's like hey there's something that like let's try to just eliminate there's so many things we can hate about that's what I always fun of there's just such a long list that doesn't involve his physical body or whatever is going on with it in a way that like why why have any bycatch with that why grab up some other peace-loving normal people who just happen to be on whatever their journey is you know with the way that we I can I can think right now andrew i can get you 20 ways to roast donald trump that doesn't unnecessarily roast someone else who didn't do anything wrong at all but my uncle's a despot

that's a pretty good spoof here i go once again with the email

something in the water sorry it's not from a female i'm just trying to keep the listeners on on their toes you know we've got folks that are driving and maybe they've got that heat on you know it's kind of it's getting wintry and maybe they're getting drowsy and i just feel like for their safety and the safety of the others on the road i just need to play some of the audio drops at four to five times the recommended volume no i understand it's definitely a safety issue

um i got a voicemail here from listener robin that i think you're going to enjoy it was inspired by the show that we recorded, I can't remember, I'm going to say it was about a week ago or maybe more, where you were eating tons of cough drops. You bought yourself a bag of, they weren't sugar-free. And you were just chowing down on those things. I really was. Those were good. And then you were like, I wonder if there's any side effects of eating too many cough drops.

Hey dummies, this is Robin in Timber and I'm calling to tell Luke a little cautionary tale about eating too many cough drops. When I was in high school, I had a really bad cold and a really bad cough, and so I bought a whole bag of cough drops, and because I'm unable to moderate myself in anything, I ate, like, the entire bag in maybe two days. I don't know how many cough drops it was, but it was a lot, and it did something really weird to my tongue where it kind of, like, I don't know how to explain it, like, killed the top layer of skin on my tongue, and so I just had this, like, weird film kind of on my tongue for about a week. and then I was sitting in class one day and I could kind of feel that this layer of skin was sort of coming up so I went to the bathroom, but I'm sorry this is so gross I went to the bathroom and I started like messing with it and I started peeling it off and it like peeled this entire dead layer of skin off my tongue like popping on every single taste and it was the most upsetting and also satisfying experience of my entire life so yeah, just maybe go easy on the cough drops don't do what i did um i don't know what that was about i've never been able to figure that out but it was really gross so just be careful all right peace out wow that

is a dream that did not happen popping off i was popping off a top layer of my tongue but tracy

morgan was there like there's no way that's oh god that sounds so rough both both absolutely disgusting and satisfying at the same time i feel that

golly okay i'll be careful i had somebody else reach out are you like are you instinctively like i'm like i'm like hey my tongue i didn't even realize i was doing that that was like me kind of getting grounded me rooting myself in the physical experience of

my tongue like you're in there you're safe you're safe i'll never do that to you i'll never do that

I had somebody else reach out to me by way of text, and they shall remain nameless, Andrew, but we know this person. You and I both know this person. And they said, I'm really sorry to hit you up this way, but there is an amount of Ricola cough drop consumption that will cause you to just have explosive diarrhea. Really? And I said, it sounds like you know the exact number. And they said, yes, I do. So That was like You know I was getting really into those But the thing because I had developed that little Tickle that little cough in Chicago That was almost making it difficult for me to record the show And then I was Quite relieved that I got up the next day And it was totally fine just like went away So now I'm the proud owner of like I don't know almost an entirely full bag Of Ricola cough drops I still have them and I have not I've not started to use them as candy as I was kind of wondering about, wondering if that was a good idea. So to all the listeners out there who are worried for me, I will not be having explosive diarrhea or peeling my tongue off anytime soon.

At least not because of Ricola.

Exactly. For other reasons that I don't really feel like getting into right now. Who knows what the future holds. Precisely. All right. Let's go ahead and wrap it up here for a Tuesday. But I have some truly incredible news. We are going to be right back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you. So please do join us for that. In the meantime, have a great day. Take care of yourselves. Stay warm and dry wherever you might be. And please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

Ricola Cough Drops, a pleasant tasting blend of organically grown herbs from Switzerland. soothing relief try Ricola power out