Muse

Hey, did you find everything you were looking for today? Yes, I did Kevin. Great. Now will this be cash or card? I will not be paying for anything today. Got it. No charge. Now will you be wanting the extended warranty coverage? I won't be talked into any extended warranty. Got it. Now if you just punch in your email... Nor will I be

punching in my email address. I won't be talked into any kind of Best Buy by a membership card or charge card.

Right, but we really do need your email to keep you up to date about promotion. Oh, for the Geek Squad.

Geek Squad, yes. Not a problem at all. Okay. T-B-T-L.

I say, I say, wait up, though. Let the fun begin. That's a tune-up, bro. This comes out to all the coffee lovers of the world.

Beware of things that cost $1.99. Those are the membership dues for this club that I joined, the Columbia House Music Club. Turns out, that wasn't really even a club. It was just a business for making money. Although it is how I found my favorite band, various artists of the 80s. What you listening to?

College music. Ever heard it? What is this guy trying to do? Is this supposed to be what Bozo's thinking or saying? What guy is Bozo? Bozo did it. Bozo did what? Bozo did the dub. How'd it go?

Well, he's going to acknowledge me on Instagram, so I guess you could say it was one of the best conversations of my entire life.

Please clap. Well, all right, hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Wednesday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Explaining how a show works means the show's already in trouble. My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host. Hello, CD listeners. Coming to you from Music City, USA, the rolling party that is Nashville, Tennessee.

There's a Hidden Valley Ranch party in my mouth.

And I'm looking out on, let's see, the Bridgestone Arena, where the Nashville Predators play hockey in the distance. The Nissan Stadium, home of the Tennessee Titans. And all kinds of merriment and music making going on around me. In fact, if you listen carefully, you can hear the sounds of music wafting up here to the 10th floor of the hotel room. I'm serious. It's like people out playing music on the streets. It's a whole situation here. I wish I could enjoy it more. I am a little bit tired. I'm a little run down. If I sound slightly low energy today, I apologize. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we? I did take a red-eye flight from Seattle to Nashville to get here to help out with this corporate event that I'm working on the next couple of days. And I do not do well on low sleep. And this is what I'm learning. I am a sleepy boy who needs his sleepy times. And I'm going to hope to not descend into my sleepy times during the recording of this episode, because that would just be basically rude here at episode 4271 in a collector series let the fun begin before i left la of course i was spending some quality time with uh mr ryan seacrest and uh was observing him i mean i was interviewing him but then i was just kind of checking out this guy's way of being in the world and it was pretty interesting actually i think i got some tips for life for living from that guy so can you can you verify can you give me some 411 give you the update on that i did one thing though that was very weird involving mouth Thwash in the Los Angeles County Museum of Art.

Memories are made in your mouth.

That I kind of regret, so we'll get into that. And we'll talk to this guy, longest-running Cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. Oh, explicit. Ooh, he is Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

Good morning, Luke. I have been to the promised land. Oh, goodness. It is.

Now you're going to say you had bigger crowds than MLK Jr.?

Hey, listen, I like his stuff. I like his stuff. A good speech, by the way, a very good speech. It was a very good speech. So I don't mind that he had crowds almost as big as mine. I, for a long time, have heard tell of a place around here that I'll bet you you've been to called the University of Washington Surplus Store, which is only open to the public one day of the week, Tuesdays from, I believe, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. And people have said, oh, you'd love it there. They just have all kinds of, like, just, I mean, a classroom gets a new projector. You got the old one goes to the surplus store. Like, I didn't know exactly what to expect, but when you think about the University of Washington and all of the various offices and not just the classrooms and the academic stuff, but labs. And so I've been.

in need of a new uh office chair i bought a sort of temporary one i don't know i don't know if you recall this whole thing i've been using like a almost like a dining room chair for the longest time and i was like huh i wonder why my bones hurt all the time uh and yeah i felt like you were

like i need to get another chair because my back is hurting and i said what did you get and you were like uh it's a spike on a roller skate it was it's just temporary yeah yeah no i mean it

was an office chair but it's sort of a it was kind of a i don't even know i i think i took a photo of it and maybe i sent it to you i think it's kind of an interesting looking chair but it is like an office chair with like five wheels on the bottom of it this is the one i bought like i don't know a couple of uh maybe six months ago or something at a used furniture store it was all they had and i'm like it was like marked down to like 35 and then when i took it to the cash register they're like oh it's we're gonna take another five or ten off so it was like why not take a flyer on this plastic office chair that wasn't ideal but cost me practically nothing and So I used that for a while.

Any time that they are voluntarily taking more off of the price that you presumably didn't even ask them to do, that's really saying something.

Yeah, but I mean, I kind of like it, though. I want to find a decent home for this thing. I'm not looking for money for it. I just think it fits somebody. It's almost Madonna. I feel like if Madonna weren't a musician but instead worked as an accountant, this might be her chair.

I've got accountancy on the brain.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Maybe there's somebody in one of your new contacts. Anyway, point is, that thing was starting to, it's not, you know, it did its job, but I wanted something a little bit more cushiony for the pushy. And so I went, and that's exactly what I said when I walked into the, anyway, I went to the surplus store. And I got myself a new desk, well, a used desk chair now that is a little bit more appropriate for my needs. I definitely feel like I'm working at KUOW again. It's not one of those high-backed black desk chairs that are super ergonomic. It's more like a, I don't know, maybe if you're an engineer or something, you might sit in a chair like this and then fiddle with your protractors and doodads. I don't know much about engineering. Does it have UW Department of Biology burned into it somewhere? No, but I did sort of wonder how many, because there's a whole bunch of chairs in this place. I mean, so many used chairs from so many various office places from, you know, whatever. I was just very enamored by this place. I didn't have much time. Oh, I love that place. I was parked in a kind of a, well, I knew that we had to record, and I knew I didn't have tons of time to just, like, meander around too much, but everything I saw.

Oh, that was the errand you needed to run.

Yeah, because it closed at four, and we're off to kind of a late start.

I'm sorry, that was the charrend you needed to run. Oh, there you go. Thank you for your charrendy. That's why you play the game.

But anyway, yeah, so I'm making too much of a deal of this, but I did go in. I was enamored. I want to go back at a time when I have more time just to wander, because they do. they have all i mean just anything you can think of like from like literally plastic cases for vhs tapes i was like you're trying to do the math do i need any of those but i just felt like the the clock ticking a bit on me when i was in there and i was like just get the chair for now and then get out of there but i'm happy with my new chair i want to return to this place again only open on tuesdays you know from mid-morning to mid-afternoon um and i'm sitting on this chair i i looked at all the other chairs some of them you know they're in various conditions and see this one is in nice condition but the other ones like some of them just had little stains here and there and it just it reminded me that all these chairs i'm looking at like somebody like came into work for potentially years and years and like sat in one of these chairs every single day not unlike the ones i used to sit in in various public radio studios that i worked in or whatever and it did occur to me that you know what i'm sitting on right now could be just absolutely filled with somebody else's farts like that that did occur to me oh is is most definitely but andrew this is

the thing you need to be unburdened by what's farted before you i need to replace it with my

own supply yes exactly that's right you think you just fell out of a fart or nut tree you just

reclaim it don't i i love that surplus i used to when i had my little apartment on capitol hill almost all of the furniture in the apartment was from the u-dub surplus store because i was also kind of into slightly i guess you could say industrial kind of design like there's they have all kinds of great like wood tables that at one time were probably in a you know in a lab somewhere they've got like like you said anything you can think of in the in the world of furniture they have it with a sort of slightly institutional bent but in kind of a cool way to me like there's a lot of like polished chrome there's just like it's basically a school the size of the university of washington is a small city so don't think of it as like oh you're just getting some furniture that was in a school think of it as like this is the furniture that a small city has decided to move on from and it really covers the entire spectrum that's a good way of putting it when

i was sort of babbling before about like you think of like it's not just the classrooms but just like everything that goes into a university and also a university that has its own medical Yeah.

system so i don't know if any of this could come from like waiting rooms or what have you but there is like some really cool like even just like storage i'm going to call them storage solutions but they're not really solutions because i was trying to think of storage problems that i had so i could bring back some of these storage solutions if that makes sense like it's a big fat brain looking for big fat problems exactly like something i don't know like probably some some big thing that people kept beakers in in the back of a lab like a little cubby hole style things i was thinking they have like all these big um kind of like you know not these are not very fashionable at all but very like um very hardy protective laptop bags that you know when you work for a university they're not going to give you like a really cool looking computer or a cool looking bag to keep it in they're going to give you like the most like robust situation possible in case you decide to take your computer and like hammer a nail in with it or something and And I was like, ooh, I could come back here and maybe buy some of this stuff if I'm looking to wrap up some of my equipment when we head out to Philadelphia for the live show. You mean replace your cardboard box you've been using for the soundboard? And now I live in cardboard box home. Yeah, so I was thinking about that because it's looking like I'm going to need to take my own mixer out to Philadelphia with me.

That's a great time for me to remind everyone we will be live in Philly, let's see, September 28th. It is a Saturday. We will be at the Friends Center there, right, kind of in downtown Philly. It's going to be an absolutely weird time. That much I can promise you is going to be absolutely weird. I keep hearing more updates from extended members of my family who are coming. Nobody asked me. Nobody said, and I'm not talking about my mom. We all know my mom's going to be there. But, like, people that are in the more distant regions of my family that are like, we got tickets, and I'm like, oh, okay. So it's going to be an interesting night. You don't want to miss it. Are they buying tickets, or are you giving them tickets? Andrew, we could probably close them. I mean, look, we ain't running a charity operation.

We're the charity. No, that is true, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, we'll give your mom a ticket and a plus one. Can we at least do that?

I think we can probably hook Su- To be honest with you, Suzy probably has a way of sneaking into the friend center that she's been doing for years. To use the swimming pool off hours. Like the Y, like how she used to sneak into the Y by wearing her headphones and having one of them still in her ear. So it looked like she was on a phone conversation and had only forgotten something when, in fact, it was her first insertion into the YMCA to go swimming. Oh, God, I love that.

And by the way, when we are out there doing this live show, if people want to see your mom. And also, we now have confirmation that Genevieve will be going out there, too. And she is not just going.

Oh, wow, a rare Genevieve sighting in the city of brotherly love. We love to hear it. We love to see it.

And just so you know, she is not just there. She's not there as a fan of TBTL. I mean, she is. She can't turn that off.

But, like, in fact, I think she probably, if anything, disdains the program.

I believe so, yes. And everything is done to our family. But she is there to work and to help us. And she will be there meeting and greeting the listeners as well. So, if you're a Genevieve stan, this is the show for you.

You've got to be careful at that UW surplus thing, though. Because I, in my basement, you know, perched high above the mighty Columbia after many moves. And in fact, I would say a couple of divorces. No, maybe one divorce. One divorce, one time. I'm trying to remember when I actually bought these incredibly heavy duty, like, what's the word I'm looking for? kind of like a cork board from the university of washington surplus except it's not cork it's carpeting so imagine a very large like a rectangle let's say it's three foot by four foot and in it's got a wood frame but then in the middle of it is just it's just carpeting and i think maybe it was used for you could it was like a was like a cork board it was something you could put push pins into i thought that they seem to have some promise for sound absorption oh okay because of the carpeting aspect and also i think maybe because i just wanted to be able to pin things up and literally i think i was going to try to write a screenplay and i wanted to storyboard it but there was some point where i went into that it must have been when i'd come back i mean certainly these things didn't move to new york with me so i had was living in seattle it might have been shortly before we moved out to Port Townsend but I bought and this is how I how I tend to operate like I think I saw one of these like at KUOW like in the wild and I thought oh this is a very useful thing you can just stick stuff up there and it's just you know it's again it's a bulletin board essentially but then I saw them for sale at the surplus and they were so cheap they were like four bucks a piece and so I bought maybe four or five of them they are so heavy and I still have them to this day and I have no use for them. And I bought them because they were kind of industrial chic and because they were cheap, but I didn't think through that I really need them.

them or not and i've now moved them into the first studio i had in port townsend out of that studio into the post office out of the post office into um the burbank springs broadcast center out of there down to where i live now and they are now just sitting in the basement so i'm just saying purchase wisely because this stuff will follow you oh yeah no i mean i actually it's speaking

of i didn't see those particular style boards although they might have been in the pile i was looking at but i did see a big like kind of um i guess stack of uh of both kind of classic bulletin boards and white boards and i was like okay okay yeah you could you could i could see a life where i would need those and then i almost texted you and john to see if you guys were interested in turning tbtl into more of a of a laboratory because there are so many glass vessels that must be i mean just amazing and they have them set up they know that they're like eye candy they have them set up in this place up by the register and you're like you're like ready to impulse buy a hundred canisters that do you no good whatsoever other than to buy the entire shelving unit of them and then set them up in your home as as as something that people can comment on

it is so cool you know what i'm realizing this is your version of rei this is aspirational to you this is like i could be a guy who has all of these beakers yeah yeah whereas i go into rei and i'm Like, I could be a guy who has all of these ice crampons that helps me climb a frozen waterfall. Yours is just more like, hey, I could be very organized in my VHS department.

Oh, my God. Yes, they have all kinds of labels. Luke, they had a little can. Well, they had several of these, but one that was very handsome. Something that would have sat on your desk in, like, 1999 to organize your, what are they? Are they three and a quarter inch floppy disks? Like, the small floppy disks that were hard plastic.

and this one was like which i always thought when those were still called floppy disks i never quite converted over to that terminology because what i consider the original floppy disk was itself floppy yeah it was and then they had the ones that you could use in a mac that were like you said rigid but the interior of it is still a floppy disk but i always thought of the one as a floppy disk and this other one is a pretty hard disk but then again hard disk is a different term

Yeah, then it would get confused with hard drives, which means that's in there. I'm trying to think. Was I right that it was like three and a quarter? Because I think the big ones that were actually kind of floppy, not the very first ones. If you watch a TV show that takes place in the very early 80s, you'll see somebody pulling out something the size of like a pizza box, like as far as always.

I don't know about that. I mean the one that used to have a little jelly bean-shaped window in the plastic where then the like, you know, where the good stuff was.

Yeah, so that's right. That's five and a quarter, and that's how big that was. And then the harder ones that came after that with the little metal thing that sort of protected that floppy disk inside that would sort of slide over to the left, that was three and a half inch floppies.

And you were tempted to buy some of this material?

They didn't have the floppies, but if you'll recall, for those harder plastic ones, sometimes those would sit on somebody's desk, and they would be almost like a Rolodex-style organizer for it. And this one, I kind of like bright primary colors. And it was like a small little handsome device. But then when you open it up, it had four individual trays in there. And it was all very clean and nice. It didn't seem like super used. And it was like a little red tray and a yellow tray and a green tray and a blue tray or something. And I was like, this is where I could keep all my floppies. And then I was like, I don't have any floppies. Do you have any floppies? No, I don't have any floppies. And then you're like, okay, well, you need to buy floppies to fit it.

And you see how it ends up becoming a problem. You know that will be the next wave. You know, whereas like for a while you go to the guy's house and he's got the like real high-end stereo that's all you know analog it'll be somehow that the those those little small floppy disks will be the thing that the real audiophiles are using like oh you don't have you don't have the this music on the floppy disk this is the only way to listen just pop that baby in here

that was my imitation are you trying to reenact your hit coffee sounds from the other day

this was awful oh that's right when you shattered the tranquility that i was creating on the program where I was stirring coffee very earnestly and taking a sip and trying to create a Maxwell House ad. And then you just, you turn into Fred Willard in that I think you should leave sketch where he's at a funeral, but he plays like the weirdo piano.

The orchid, right?

And then unfortunately, television's Chris Hayes loved it. So that only encourages this kind of behavior.

I didn't realize that you would have been in your bonnet about that whole thing. I was just surprised I was able to get those sound effects to work so seamlessly.

It was actually a very funny thing.

Live on the fly. Like, I'm just like, that's always a disaster.

but somehow because one of those was no that was good yeah no i don't you know what i'm sorry i feel like man this has been a tough week for the listeners because i feel like i've been i was crabby about uh mondrian the other day and i'm not I don't I'm not consciously aware of being crabby but I am very very worn out already by this travel schedule that I created for myself this week where I was in LA and then you know flying in the middle of the night out here to Nashville and then I was talking to Becca on the phone a little while ago and I was coughing and she literally said don't you dare oh could you imagine if I if I pushed myself to the point where I was under the weather for this trip that

we've been talking about for literally years oh that's right yeah so you know let's well first of all and you know i i always do this i always just try to give you a little dollop of something quasi interesting at the top of the show and then i end up like taking over now it's been a half hour you interviewed a celebrity today and i'm just talking about unneeded floppy disc holders

but that's not true at all um i any chance to reminisce about reminisce about the surplus uw surplus store i'm into it i love that place we're gonna go back we're gonna do a live show

from there but really quickly before we get into your today's activities can you remind everybody like what is the timeline for you to actually be boarding this airplane and heading over to

Italia Italiano that's not going to be happening until Saturday morning so I'm I've had this this gig in Nashville scheduled for months and months and it just all sort of worked out that the so what's happening is on Friday I'll be flying to New York and I'm going to stay in New York for like a day and then becca's flying from uh portland and then we're gonna meet up and then we're going uh to italy from there which is and i didn't realize you're not stopping at home after like three different u.s cities which is why i've been dragging around this like steamer trunk like george bailey and it's a wonderful life where the i'm getting nagged by the people at the airport it is i have to say the number one annoyance of my week is this a gigantic suitcase that i'm bringing everywhere it makes me feel embarrassed it's really heavy makes you feel like a tourist right

you pride yourself on being like a savvy traveler and I didn't even start that realizing that I was going to be cool I actually kind of meant that literally like you pride yourself as being somebody who this is not your first rodeo you know how to get through an airport you know how to travel light and pack light and be sort of seamless and now you're dragging this thing around and not only is it a pain in the ass tell me if I'm right here but it also is you feel like it's a signifier that you are a bit of a rube i feel like it signifies that i don't know how to

pack which maybe is the same thing as what you're saying it makes me because it's like okay great great bro you just came to nashville you don't need that much stuff for nashville and i'm like i know i feel like i want to clarify to every like lyft and uber driver i'm this is not how i pack for like three days in nashville this is because i'm not going to be home for three weeks you know from the start of this trip the other thing is the suit i ordered some new suitcases on amazon and i will say the nice thing is they roll very well in the airport even the huge one the not nice thing is if i if they are sitting on a surface if they're resting on a surface that is even in the slightest bit not level they are running away from you like they work too well so yesterday when I was still in Los Angeles and I was going over to interview we were meeting up at LACMA because Ryan Seacrest is on the board of the LA County Museum of Art so we were going to do a sit-down interview and then we're going to go take a walk around the museum and just chat a little bit and so first of all I get there to the museum and I meet our friend John Goodwin who's producing the piece and I've got like all this luggage which makes me again makes me just feel kind of odd that i'm wheeling this into like an art museum like what are you doing and i look over and i realize ryan seacrest and his entourage are entering the building right behind us like they've gotten there early because the guy is the height of professionalism more on that in a moment and so of course like we were supposed to film starting at two i was supposed to be there at 130 i was actually getting there by 140 he was actually getting there by 140 and i go running through security i wheel my big suitcases into the elevator with goodwin and i go hit close hit close i don't want ryan seacrest to see me with luggage because i think it makes it look like i'm you know going through something i don't know why i really didn't want to be in the elevator with him and his people and my big giant suitcases and it worked we got up there and then i stashed it with the camera gear and then it was fine um but uh but so that that was yesterday and then when it When the shoot was all wrapped up, I went to LAX, flew to Seattle, flew out here, and maybe got an hour of sleep on the plane, an hour or two of sleep. But then I went right to work with this corporate event that I'm helping out with. I will say this about old Ryan Seacrest. Well, the first thing that was a little unnerving was we sit down for the interview, and he goes, So, you come from a really large family? I go, Yeah. And it's clear that he had Googled me, and probably, I'm sure it was under four minutes. he had taken the time to go on my wikipedia page and figure out at least one detail about me oh that's nice it's very thoughtful right very demure yeah very mindful are you familiar with that meme no i don't think so you will be you will be um uh it's i mean it was the guy is a very

very on it like in terms of again something as simple as that like he is a very busy person And that's one of the number one things people know about him is he has a lot of the jobs. And amidst all of those jobs, he was like, I'm going to go do this TV interview. Now, the guy's on TV, like, well, at this point, six days a week or something. So you could see a world in which he's like, I'm just going to go knock out this TV interview. I do TV interviews all the time. It's going to be fine. No, he sat down and went on the Internet or had someone print out some kind of folio on me, some kind of bio packet, and did at least some amount of research on who I am as a person. He was like, you're from Northern California, you lived on a religious commune. I was like, oh, my God, this is unnerving at the beginning. This is not supposed to be about me. Let's talk about you.

Is that stuff all definitely on your Wikipedia? Do you happen to know? Like, is the religious background, is the commune on Wikipedia?

I mean, I put it all on there, so unless someone took it down. I assume so. I mean, to be honest with you, I don't know for a fact, but my education—

I just think it'd be interesting if he went deeper than just Wikipedia is what I'm going for there.

I don't I don't think it went deeper than that. It didn't you know, it wasn't it seemed just like this is a guy who's a very, very prepared, very professional, also very nice. Like the thing that was tough about hanging out with him was he never stopped asking questions of everybody, which is my move when I'm not here droning on about red eye flights. like i tend to be a person who in social situations just does a lot of like interviewing of people because it's what i'm comfortable with and he's like interviewing me he's talking to the sound person talking to the the makeup person he's just like there was this moment we went in the museum that i thought was genuinely touching so they closed off part of the museum for us to walk around in and um this there's an ed rushe um exhibit there uh and so they had asked one of the people who does security for LACMA a woman maybe in her 60s or something in her little uniform with her mask on had been tasked with the inenviable task of basically roping off part of this thing this very popular exhibit the Ed Ruscha exhibit and then telling people you can't go in there right now and there was a guy older I don't know what the guy's story was seemed a little entitled seemed like probably looked like pretty put together like he might be a person of some Means who's in LACMA and wants to go See this Ed Ruscha thing And there's some poor Docent slash security person who's having to tell Him you can't go in there right now and I don't think he took it very well and I think He was kind of a little bit brusque Or rude to this person I wasn't aware any Of this was happening until Ryan Seacrest walked over And said to this security woman Hey I saw that I want to tell you you're doing a good

Job don't let that get to you oh nice

Love that yeah and he was not we were not filming He was not doing that For like to get on tv being a mensch like he just that just seemed to be his vibe he introduced himself to everyone in the room direct eye contact demonstrated curiosity about other people i mean he was a very i i really thought like okay this is i mean listen the the ship of me ever being a legitimately famous person has more than sailed and i think that's best for everyone involved but i did kind have in the back of my mind if i ever became i don't know if i were ryan seacrest i would hope that i would act exactly the way that ryan seacrest appears to act yeah no that even even if you're not famous that's just a nice way to act well yes very good point i mean any of us yeah just being a thoughtful person and just noticing other people in the world um i guess i don't know if i had seen you know there are people that are sort of famously like down to earth like tom hanks is another one that people love to say like he's just such a normal guy even though he's tom hanks you know there are people that are kind of well known for their bon homie i don't know if that's the public story on this seacrest dude but it did not seem fake did not seem like it was you know if for me to notice it it seemed like it's just a thing that he has kind of developed or yeah you're that's a good way to put it andrew he just seems like he's a pretty decent dude who happens to have these jobs that make him pretty famous and i thought i want to make sure that i keep being a decent dude i want to make sure that i keep because even you know again i'm i'm such a small speck in the ocean of whatever notoriety people might have but i can feel myself sometimes when i'm a little maybe burned out or stressed out or my mind is somewhere else i can kind of find myself leaning into the I'll see you later. privilege of the jobs that i get to have and the way that people are somewhat deferential at times even this thing that i'm here helping out with this corporate event in nashville it's a really big a very big production it's a lot of people attending this thing it's a lot of people working on a lot of people putting in a ton of work a lot of people who are like um hired by the convention center and then ultimately by the people putting on the conference to stand in places and you know direct traffic or be helpful or bring food there's just like so much catering going on and sometimes it's like attempting to just want to sit on my phone and scroll tick tock or something if i'm not immediately you know being asked to do something but also like saying hi to the person the the woman who's brought the coffee into the you know snack room or whatever is also a nice way to be in the world and i can find myself sometimes wanting to just like let me give another example when i get in a ride share and i really don't feel like talking to the person because i think like i'm burned out or i'm somebody who should be allowed to just like sit and and vegetate and meditate or whatever it's like i just i want to make sure that i'm being a good person in the world it was nice to see some pretty clear examples of that coming from

old seacrest yeah i like that although um you know the the back the back seat of a ride share i also think is a conversation to be had again whether or not you're somebody who somebody would recognize or not like there i mean there is like i do think that that's a bit of a two-way street I don't want to have a conversation here. By the way, I felt like I was, it was weird. Yesterday was one of the kind of rare nights these days where I was kind of like, oh, God, I said a lot. I pooped on a lot of things a lot of people like yesterday. Like a lot of people catching strays yesterday from the Olympics to Tom Cruise to the Red Hot Chili Peppers. It's like, why did I just have to? But then I was uncomfortable about it because I legitimately don't want to take away other people's joy, but I also want a space where I can have my own opinions.

And, I mean, we've got to say something on this show. That was what I was telling Seacrest. I was like, I do a podcast, and what I can tell you about it is we keep the needle moving.

Yeah, and, like, I was thinking about that a lot yesterday. It's like, I want to be able to be honest about my opinions on things without like feeling like, oh, if I say I don't like, let's just say the Red Hot Chili Peppers, which was one that stuck in my head because like, I just have never liked them. I don't have a reason for it. And I'm not trying to convince other people not to like them. But I assume that they're, I would guess that more people in our audience feel good or neutral about them than dislike them. You know what I mean? So like, why do I have to do that? But on the other hand, like, I don't want to be afraid to say I don't want to like because people I've seen people on social media, like kind of lash out and say, you say that you don't want to hurt our feelings. But when you say you don't like something, it just bums me out, which I I'm not trying to dismiss that. I understand that to a degree, but also like, I don't know if I'm totally toothless. I'm toothless enough. Trust me. Like, you know, so anyway, I was thinking about that yesterday night. And I was like, God, I hope I didn't like hope I didn't bum people out because I was like kind of negative on a whole bunch of different things. And then I went back and I listened to a little bit of I was like, oh, the bigger complaint here is I was so uncomfortable doing it that I was talking a mile a minute, which was actually the bigger offense. You could hear you could hear the sort of stress in my voice, which actually bums me out even more so. So I don't know how I kind of got onto that whole thing. But, oh, I was going to say, I don't want to be super negative about like the idea of like our role is as passengers in a ride share. There's a balance there. But I do feel like if you're one person who's in a ride share with a driver, I don't think, you know, both of those people, I think, should be sort of considered in the fact that I'm in a small space with another human being. You know what I mean? Like, I want to be polite and treat that person who happens to be driving me around like a human being. But also, I think that there can be a certain social contract that I believe drivers have many times, like, sort of gone over the line with as far as, like, assuming the passenger's interest in the many details of their life or journey or ideas about politics or where I live in Koreatown, as it was one time. I'm like, I've been in the car with people who are like rat-a-tat-tatting and will not kind of take, not because you're there to serve me, but just because we live in a society and we should pick up on some social cues.

How would you feel about a Lyft driver flipping you off, which happened to me yesterday?

How far into the show are we before? I thought I was the one who had forgotten about it until.

And it is once again, Andrew, as everything in my life is right now, luggage related. so I get done with the thing at LACMA and now I come outside and this is you want to talk about some boring deets the that museum is on Wilshire Boulevard in Los Angeles and because they're building a new LACMA one of the things Ryan Seacrest wanted to show me was they're building this insane new building for it that's actually going to be really remarkable when it's done because it's going to go over Wilshire it's actually going to like space.

the street but for right now it's just a giant construction mess and what that means is all of the there's all this temporary stuff up there's all these signs about what you can and can't do you can't stop like you're if you were to get dropped off by a ride show you're literally not allowed to stop in this construction area because there's no shoulder there's not anywhere for anyone to pull over there's no parking just like this shoot of you know two lanes and you cannot anyway so i am standing out there and i have these two enormous bags um it's really hot and i don't like we and i have like i also have my computer bag i'm not enjoying the experience of wheeling this luggage around los angeles and the problem is when you put in the location to like lift where you need to be picked up which was lacma it's trying to send them to this kind of no man's land of construction and so i i know this is going to happen but i don't really know how to avoid it because that is technically where i am but what i need is for the guy to come like towards one end of the block for me so i put in the drop the pin or whatever i put the thing in and i see a guy picks up the fair he's a probably 20s maybe somebody in their 20s and then i call him and i said hey you know um there's all this construction i go i'm over here on ogden i'm around kind of around the corner i got these two big suitcases so can you just come over this way and he's like well because yeah doesn't want to let me do a left which is true technically like one of these part of the construction so he was he was basically across this street wilshire from me and then down the street and behind all this construction stuff so i couldn't see his car i kind of knew where he was but what i knew was it was going to be like a two block walk for me in the los angeles heat wheeling these giant rolling suitcases across by the way not just like a regular street but like a street that is rutted and under construction literally tearing up wilshire so it's like this heavy ass unwieldy luggage take it through a massive construction zone where when we crossed it with seacrest somebody in our group almost got hit because it takes like the lights are screwed up it's a it's a nightmare so i said to the guy yeah well could you just like, I don't know, come around or do a U-turn or something? He's like, I goes, uh, I'm over here. I'm over by lack. Michael, I know where you are, but I have these luggage. Anyway, we're sitting there in kind of a standoff for a while. And he basically just kind of like, lets it be known to me that he's not going to come over to where I am because it would necessitate him taking an illegal left turn, which is sort of fair, but I wish he would have just like done a larger loop, you know, or something. We basically have a standoff and I'm sitting there and I'm getting frustrated and i just kind of go like okay and then i hang up and then i just cancel the ride now by the way

he gets five dollars yeah you're right yeah or does he get it you definitely get charged five

dollars well okay fair point i get charged five dollars um he also i will mention that this when this guy picked up the fare he would must win a block away it was it wasn't like one of those ones where your driver's on the way they'll be there in 20 minutes you know and they change their whole life for it like he's out and about and so i still haven't seen the guy i mean i see his picture on my phone but i have not i've not gotten eyes on his vehicle i know it's like a white nissan that was the other thing i was worried about was could i even fit this luggage in the back of the white nissan because guess what in the morning i had a driver cancel on me because of the luggage they wouldn't take me to lacma i'm i'm wheeling my stuff out to the front of mondrian and i call the driver and i say hey i'm out in front because the driveway is a hassle and i'm just me and my luggage i want to and she goes you have luggage and i was like i mean you're picking me up from a hotel uh it's a decent it's a it's a safe bet she goes you have luggage and i go she goes i'm sorry i have to cancel the fare and then she canceled on me so anyway back to

please what don't you know how to pack like why are you carrying i know that's the thing and it's

like you know what the worst part is it's mostly like though it's mostly those like cans of mixed

nuts that actually have snakes in them that's right and then pool noodles because like a couple

of the hotels in europe have a pool so what am i going to do if i don't have a pool noodle and you

do you have some um three and a half inch floppy organizers in there a ton but they're not organized that's the problem that's the piled in there they're piled in okay yeah i realized i i thought i was poking a bear with a short stick on that one anyway so so you've now canceled the ride but

you guys are also within sight i've canceled the ride but we're not far away from each other and i'm just standing on the corner in yuma arizona i'm uh is that what you know winslow arizona we

went there remember yes that's right we took a photo by the um by the statue of the all men who

does the eagles yes take it easy take it easy so take it easy so i canceled the ride and i feel a little sheepish about it because i didn't i didn't just tell him i'm gonna cancel if you don't come over here i didn't i wasn't really even that mad i just i was like either i pay five dollars Or CBS pays five dollars Or I have to drag this really heavy luggage across this like torn up major thoroughfare in los angeles where when the light changes it doesn't give you enough time to even get across you have to cross it in sections which is how somebody in our crew almost got hit and you know who was the most worried about it seacrest i shit you not it was our sound person and he was like whoa whoa you're okay and i had no idea she could have died by the way i love this sound person you said don't don't worry about her she's fine she can figure it out like i'm not kidding like it was like i was like oh i should be i should be more thoughtful about the people that i work with but anyway so i just cancel the fair i'm just like i i'm gonna start over i can't i don't have the words to negotiate this with this person right now i don't want to argue about it it's five dollars it's kind of wasteful but on the other hand i'm just gonna i'm literally gonna start fresh and make sure that the next person because the other thing i didn't want to do was force this guy to come do this thing he doesn't want to do and then we're in the car together for 50 minutes because that's how long it takes to go eight miles in los angeles and you know in the afternoon so i cancel it and then i'm just standing there and i'm kind of looking at my phone like to get another ride to get someone else and i just see from out from behind all this construction debris a white nissan and a guy with the window roll down go hey and then just flip out a middle finger and just zoom on down

wilshire it was brandon my guy i kind of like that that's kind of city life though i kind of like that's kind of a real hey i'm walking here i wasn't even that mad it feels more new york than

la to me honestly i mean i i was trying to figure out if this was a bummed if this was a bad deal for him or not i mean like he got i don't know how much of that five dollars he gets that should go 100 to the driver by the way without a doubt like what's what's lyft's exposure on that

financially yeah i know usually and usually these companies do put like their people first so historically just historically so you have a point yeah people before profits that's what they say my favorite uh dilbert to you as i always do when this comes up i feel like because it's like okay

you pulled up you the other thing was where he was apparently idling was definitely the part of the road again i couldn't see him but just based on like what i understood about it he was already kind of breaking the law by idling over you know where those those all those lamps are you know that installation that's like the lights at lack oh yeah of course it's like hundreds of like lamp posts yep that this is where this is all unfolding just for you yep and you only andrew

to kind of be able to picture it well yeah i don't know if people can picture where it is but certainly that's become very iconic i'm sure yeah i'm sure everybody listening right now has seen somebody um post their engagement photos in those yes yes popular for that sort of thing but like

so uh i know that where he was parked was he was not supposed to be stopped where he was stopped my point being he was already kind of like doing one bad thing why not throw a little illegal a little illegal left turn on the list like i don't want to advocate for violating the traffic laws but i kind of feel like i don't know every once in a while like even you could just slightly bend the rules i mean it wasn't even like a real it isn't like this historically this intersection said no left turns it just had to do with the craziness of the construction so then he got he got five dollars or maybe three dollars of the five dollars to have like a two-minute conversation with me and then go about his life so that i couldn't figure out if the middle finger was warranted or not but weirdly it didn't make me mad do you think i make more or less than five dollars every two minutes i talk to you that's a really good question i mean i'm trying to put

myself in his shoes and i'm like well i'm kind of em in your shoes how much how much is it worth my

time to talk to you for i think the the more important question is how much like today we're not seeing each other because we're on the special different connection how much of the show are you

flipping me off it's been non-stop so far tell me if you can tell what i'm doing it am i doing it now or am i doing it now am i doing it now or am i doing it now now you're doing it now i have been

this was the whole time yes this was the one other thing that happened uh with this uh brian seacrest thing that was i felt like i was channeling the spirit of lucille ball for some reason so i was i don't know why i was i ran out of chewing gum you know me i'm very concerned about breath i ran out of gum did you say i came here to do two things chew gum and interview ryan seacrest i guess that's that's how i literally how i started the conversation i i didn't have any gum and so i was like very worried about even though i had brushed my teeth and so i was just like worried about my breath so what they had in the hotel were those little just like you know airplane bottle size things of mouthwash and so i grabbed that and my plan was right before i sit down to do the interview i will i'll wash my mouth out with the mouthwash and that'll give me minty fresh breath so I'm carrying this unopened bottle of mouthwash with me and then remember I'm like hustling into the elevator with my luggage because I don't want to um be seen with it by the by the the great Ryan Seacrest and his entourage and in the elevator I I pour some of the mouthwash into my mouth and I'm kind of swishing it around and then we walk into the place where we're going to film and i just realized of course there's no sink in here this is the offices of this is the the actual office of the director of lacma who they were nice enough to loan it to us to shoot in by the way real nice real designy real nice um so i'm now standing in this office and i don't know i don't know where i was planning on spitting the mouthwash like that was the part of the plan i didn't think through it's like i'll swish the mouthwash around and then i'll spit it out and i was like of course i'm i'm not in a bathroom right now i'm in someone's office oh and guess who's walking in ryan seacrest guess who's saying hi to me guess what i'm swallowing an entire mouthful of mouthwash then i'm like does it have alcohol am i getting drunk am i kitty dukakis right now this now i'm

starting to get the whole picture so you're me you're seeing i know you're not meeting the canary

that i had to swallow it you've got the because it was the evidence you're dragging around like

an old battered suitcase you're literally drinking mouthwash i'm starting to get the picture here starting to get the picture yeah yeah it's not going well for your boy burbs it's not unlike

lionel hutt's in some ways i'd almost i almost paid that hot plate off what i had one payment left on that hot plate i did though literally was like i take this huge swig of mouthwash and only as like i realized i have to like i've got to do something with this mouthful of mouthwash and the only thing i think to do is swallow it but doesn't mouthwash have a pretty high alcohol content isn't that something that unfortunately people who are really struggling might drink as a way of getting themselves kind of like bonkers i remember that being a trope uh back in the day

i don't know if they've adjusted the the recipe and those things because of that or not but i do

remember that definitely being a thing yeah like oh you know well you drink some mouthwash i literally was like as i'm swallowing i'm like is this gonna make me like i mean i could have a shot of alcohol and it wouldn't make me crazy drunk but is this like 20 times more powerful than alcohol like regular alcohol like what is this gonna do me it turns out it did nothing everything was fine but i just thought i'm really lucille bawling my way through life right now having to swallow swallow this like a mouthwash before anyone catches me with it for no reason

other than just poor planning yeah that is interesting that you didn't even consider what you were going to do i mean there must have been a little voice in the back of your head like well

i'll just swallow this if need be right i mean no i gave no thought to that part of the of the of the sort of production i literally never imagined spitting it out i just thought well this mouthwash will make sure that i don't have bad breath do you think more dentists are now

putting little um mouthwash and i'm sorry mouth brushing state to tooth brushing stations i guess is the word I'm looking for, in their offices since we've advocated for that on the show. Yeah, but we did get one note from a listener who said, I guess my dentist has been on top of it for a long time because he does have a little, I guess, a little room you can go into while you're waiting. And I think you specifically said you don't want it to be a restroom. You don't want it to be anywhere associated with going to the bathroom, but just a little room with a sink and maybe some of those nice little, for some reason I pictured those, you use them around Christmas time, although you can use them all the time. The little nice smelly sticks that you can put. Oh, yeah, Frazier. Yeah, like a little diffuser stick in there. I love those. A little place where you can brush your teeth. I've been thinking about that a lot. It's bananas that dentist offices don't have that. And anyway, the reason I bring it up is because maybe you thought you were going into one of those situations where there's going to be a little sink or a spittoon.

I heard that they had a lot of spittoons around LACMA, but unfortunately they did not. But the good news is I do think this must have been some low-alcohol mouthwash, so it did not lead to me embarrassing. Could you imagine if it was like, wow, that guy reeked of alcohol and seemed very confused, and I'd be like, you don't understand. It was a mouthwash.

Well, listen, I know you haven't been drinking a lot lately, but aside from that, I still don't think a mouthful of mouthwash is going to turn you into some sort of drunken piece.

I was legitimately concerned for about a minute and a half because again my thought was if this is somehow hyper like you know how rubbing alcohol yeah has i think i guess i'm guessing like like an amount of alcohol that if you drank you know a little bit of it you could really hurt yourself it could be really bad for you because it's just not designed for that yeah then i'm also thinking yeah but how many how much mouthwash do people accidentally swallow it can't be that bad yeah that's what i was no way they're allowed to sell it to you if the consequences but this is all what's going through my mind mind as uh ryan secrets is entering the room right yeah and you're like a journey and you're

burping out feathers like um that was weird but that was right sylvester is the name i was looking

for there hello and welcome to top story all right top story today coming from our friend andrew walsh regarding a my new favorite seattle mariner by the way a lot of people's new favorite

seattle mariner by the way i want to i want to make this very clear first of all we're going to keep this quick because i know that you're getting near very near the end of your day and your rope there um but i do want to make it clear as always this is not and i'm being quite serious here this is not a story about sports this is about a uh this is about a man and his love of monkeys uh Victor Robles is a baseball player who was like very, very much ballyhooed back when he was like kind of being drafted and he was drafted, I believe, by the Washington Nationals. He was supposed to be one of the best in the game. And for some reason, his time at the Nationals, I think, did not live up to that expectation. And I don't really know how long ago that was or much of his backstory. But I know that he came over to be a Seattle Mariner, I believe. He wasn't an offseason acquisition, right? I think it was like halfway through the year they picked him up around June.

He was mid-season, and I was, his first time he went out to play, he, I believe, like dropped a fly ball or struck out, and then not only did I not ballyhoo him, I hooed him. You hooed him. I texted our sports chain. I said, like, turns out the guy that, like, you know, the other teams don't want might not be good at baseball. Like, I was extremely. Oh, yeah, I vaguely remember that, yeah. Acidic about this guy. I do remember that. Boy, was I wrong.

But, yeah, so I, and again, I really do, So that was just a little background on kind of who he is and kind of like, you know, just imagine being one of the people who's most anticipated as like a rookie player. And even, you know, I don't I don't know that he was terrible with the Nationals, but clearly they got rid of him and he didn't live up to the hype, you know. And I do think there's something about the the psychology of that, probably. But I'd heard that he was like a real personality, but he comes over to the Mariners and he gets a slow start over here. And so we don't see a lot of that personality when you're scuffling a bit. you're not going to see it but he's been um playing a lot better a lot better lately he's been one of our our major uh hitters lately and um he uh and this last sunday a few days ago now um the mariners got to do something that they had not done in literally 20 years which is a game of theirs was featured on sunday night baseball the espn tv and radio program and that's just sort of a you know like first of all i was expecting the worst right national national lights on a team that's kind of had its ups and downs we'd already won two of the games against the mets i'm like we're not going to get a sweep and we're going to embarrass ourselves in the national spotlight it's just going to be the way it works turns out that is not the way it worked the mariners and i'm sorry to our dear mets fans i know being a mets fan is not the easiest thing in the world um but uh the mariners ended up like kind of demolishing the mets uh on sunday night baseball uh you know in the as the as the world watched and um one of the things i didn't get to see this because i only got to listen to part of the game um but apparently espn is still miking up their miking up certain

players like mostly i can't believe that this is like they do this during real games like it's one thing during the all-star game or preseason but like it just is remarkable to me that they're trying to interview someone who's trying to play center field in the major league level the first

time i heard it was mike trout and um i think it was during an all-star game and so it wasn't as big of a risk sort of and i was like oh man this is really awesome you just mike trout just out there in center field chatting you could go a whole inning without having a ball come his way but if a ball does come your way and you're you're literally chatting with the broadcasters in the booth about whatever and then you might have to interrupt yourself say a whole lot of plays coming my way it's a really interesting dynamic and so apparently they're doing that on Sunday Night Baseball and I heard this after the fact but we had Victor Robles playing center field for us and apparently some of that flashy or at least interesting personality is coming through and he's like kind of chatting with the guys in the in the broadcast booth it was supposed to be half an inning apparently they kept them mic'd up for the bottom the bottom of the second as well because he was so entertaining I assume that he did not have an at bat but anyway he's out there he's chatting and apparently i didn't realize this but victor robles has pet monkeys he's from the dominican republic originally and i don't have the the part where they ask him about this on tape but this is his answer and i'm going to give you a little bit of a setup because i kind of don't want to interrupt this i'm going to play the full 35 seconds of of what i consider to be very very charming tape of a very charming man so victor's out there in center field um he doesn't know if he's gonna you know like the

The game is in progress. Maybe a ball will come his way. And it ensures, heck, a ball has hit his way. I believe it's a pop fly. He interrupts his conversation with these broadcasters to say, I got to get this. What they're asking him about is if it's true he has pet monkeys. And then there's a few other things I'll explain after you listen to this tape. But listen to this.

So growing up, I was watching monkeys on TV. And I saw how fun they do in jumping around. And I described myself. I look monkey and I serve myself on monkeys. And I just say, sorry, guys, I have to make the play.

Made the catch and threw a cannon back to the infield.

Now, I want to mention something. Yes, he throws it. I'm going to play a little bit more of this. But he does throw a cannon back to the infield, but he fires it at second base. And it's not a good throw. It's too fast and it's too low. And so it goes skimming by whoever's playing second or maybe shortstop there.

Hey, you're going to cash it. Wait, so do you have a little bit too hard? Sorry, mate. Do you have monkeys running around the house? No, they have their own house.

So, first of all, I love the busting of the chops, too. I don't know if that was Dylan Moore, whoever he fired it to. He throws an offline and it goes skipping past him. and then he yells he yells at the other player hey you gotta catch that when he knows it's his fault and no no no the monkeys have their own house luke oh i love that tape so much i mean

i cannot first of all um he's doing it in his non-native language let's just take a moment i feel like we don't give these athletes anywhere near enough credit for the fact that many of them if they're from somewhere else have had to learn an entirely new language in the midst of all of this but like that he has that level of like he's able to say in english oh i'm sorry i've got to

run in and catch this fly ball like sorry guys it's stunning just stunning have we ever gotten

clarification so so let me just but let me just quickly recap here so we he does have pet monkeys but they live in their own house yeah no no they have their own house has pet monkeys he has pet

monkeys or some sort of monkeys that he cares for and i believe they're back in the dominican

republic yes okay so he's not living you've been living in the monkey house he's not living in the monkeys are living in the monkey house he's living in his own house exactly i i know this is not a conversation about baseball i love that we signed him yes to an extension it's so interesting because it's it shows such optimism because i think victor robles has played for what like eight years or

something in the majors oh hasn't been that long see i didn't i didn't realize i don't know i thought

i had heard that i could be wrong i've been wrong before um i thought he believed that i was picturing it shorter but i would believe that i had the thought that he was somebody who'd like you know kind of played a long time and not ever really put it together and then it was just kind of having a nice little run with the mariners but i mean they clearly think like oh no this is someone who's actually critical to our team and we want to make sure that we have his services for the years to come i found that so heartening because i feel like we don't do that a lot we're very mercenary at times as a team and just kind of like you know i don't know it's like i just for some reason the idea that it's it is still the case that you could just like have a really good july and august and then the team would be like okay well now we're gonna extend your contract and that it's victor robles and that he has pet monkeys and that he's funny and likable like i love that i i really do think he might be kind of necessary as like an emotional spark for this team because it's like you know i don't whatever now it's just going to descend into deep mariner talk but like do we think like do we have personalities on this team really like i don't think cal raleigh is a personality i think he's very good i'm glad we have him but he's not i don't even know if julio is a personality i think julio is like a personality i don't think

i don't think you love the personality because he's very marmaduke and that he's just always positive and always smiling with that but it's a but it is a personality and people will point that out and i would say jp is another personality j you know jp crawford i think is a personality

he's a spark yeah i think so i guess so i i don't know who i'm thinking i maybe it's maybe what it

is is they're not quirky enough for me generally was a honey was suarez was a great i like the

vibes yeah he's i like the vibes with him and i like that robles has monkeys i think i just i feel like i came up in the era where the mariners were so bad but we usually had a couple of weirdos we Like, you know, like, you know, who was our I can't believe I'm forgetting the name of our pitcher who threw for the who got us Gaylord Perry, who was like would throw this like legendary spitball. Gaylord Perry looked like he was easily in his early 70s when he was pitching for the Mariners and throwing what everyone knew was a cheat.

pitch but he just didn't care like we just used to have weirdos on the team and i feel like i like that we haven't and i mean this in the best way i like that we have a new weirdo who has a bunch of

monkeys living at his house yeah i think yeah i completely agree and also i mean this is one of those weird things i'm looking at his stats and we don't have to get into it i mean it doesn't look like he was like terrible um in washington but definitely like didn't live up to the hype didn't live up to the expectations um and you are right by the way he started in 2017 so this is his eighth season they spent you know the seven and a half with with the washington nationals but um i agree with you like there's something that you know i can't put my finger on it and clearly i'm i'm as i'm as far away from understanding what happens in um you know in locker rooms and clubhouses and dugouts like whatever like i don't know but i do for some reason believe that you know kind of maybe this is obvious but like winning sort of begets winning and when you're feeling good and then you can start to let like it's just really hard to let your character come through when you're really struggling whether you're struggling you know just by yourself like mitch garver who we were talking about on the show i think last week or the week before who was like literally near tears talking about how he's like you know like letting the team down and disappointing them he's like this is you know i don't want to be this person either but you can't be fun and goofy and be talking about your monkey house you know when when you're when you're in that thing and so when you start to feel good and then not it's just like just like when you start a new job right like the first week if you're late one day at your first job that's awful if you've been working at a job for 10 years you've never been late once that first day that you're late in year 10 it's not a big deal you gotta you know you can you earn you earn the the respect of the people around you and you can relax a little bit and have some fun well i'm i'm you know it helps

when you sweep the Mets, but I'm feeling good, which is almost always a harbinger of something terrible happening. Exactly, yeah. We'll just look for that tonight as they take on with the Tigers.

Yeah, that's our – tonight will be game two of the Tigers, yeah.

Oh, we played – oh, I was on the airplane. Wait, we – oh, we played last. Did we win?

We're doing something here, Luke. We're doing something here. We're doing something here. This is Wednesday's show. Oh, I forgot.

but i'm sorry i was trying we got almost to the end that was so andrew you know what that was quality broadcasting by you and that was low quality co-broing by me that was so bad i was like i can't you know i'm i'm down to such a few number of like um you know brain cells still firing i was like they played a game and i didn't know about it okay the jig is up i'm truly sad

No, the jig is up. They're playing right now as we record this on Tuesday evening, and they are getting absolutely slaughtered by the Detroit Tigers. No, really? Oh, apparently one run just came in since I started this sentence, so it's now 5-1.

So, in other words, I was right. Because I felt hope, because I felt good about the Mariners, it, by definition, meant that they were going to be doing poorly today. And I couldn't have known how right I was, but I guess I was very right.

What just happened between you and I, it was almost exactly like what happened. This was last season. I can't remember who it was, and it's not memorable because it didn't end up being a no-hitter. But I remember I was at a dive bar kind of in my neighborhood. Oh, there's something I want to talk to you about actually on tomorrow's show regarding bars in my neighborhood. But I was at this dive bar that we go to sometimes to watch the Mariners games. I think it was last season, maybe the season before. But a Mariner pitcher was up there. And we were pretty deep into a game, like at least six, at least six innings in. Maybe this pitcher was even pitching into the seventh and we had a no hitter going. And you're not supposed to say the word no hitter, right? It's bad luck. And I don't believe in God and I don't believe in magic. And I don't think I believe in luck, but I believe in that. And I believe that you do not call it out. You don't call out a no hitter and you certainly don't call it a perfect game. And Genevieve and I were both locked in on this because I had somehow tipped off even like, hey, look at the, you know, like, look, look what's going on. here and she's like oh yeah and so we're watching we're kind of excited but it's like a midsummer game you know it's not an otherwise super important game but i realized what the pitcher is working on and i want let's just say it was castillo it was probably castillo uh on the mound and there's some guy next to us and he's kind of getting into the game and veves and i are like excited and he's really excited but i can tell he doesn't quite understand what's happening and i keep on saying yeah man it's good man look at the box score man look at the box score hey dude look at look at the box score he's like yeah yeah it's good we're winning i'm like hey man yeah look at the box you know like i feel like i don't know maybe i didn't just keep saying that but i kept saying various things i was kind of like yeah just kind of take a moment and like kind of like look what look what's going on here and then and then i think it was sometime in that inning the the uh the no hitter gets broken up somehow, and then...

I go, well, there goes the no-hitter. And he's like, that's what you were talking. Ah, I kid. The whole time I'm like, dude, dude, we're doing something here. We're doing something. Dude, we're doing something. He's pitching really good, isn't he, brother? And, like, he just would not hear what I was trying to tell him.

I just jinxed the no-hitter that was this Wednesday edition of TBTL. Oh, my God.

It's now 7-1, so I must have missed. I don't know if we just went to the bottom or if I looked at that incorrectly a second ago. I thought it was 5-0, then 5-1, but it is now 7-1. So the more we talk, the worse this gets. This is amazing.

Well, we better stop talking then. You know, the number one rule when you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. Yes, exactly. Play words by doves. There we go. All right. Thanks for listening, everyone. We are going to be back here tomorrow with more Imaginary Radio for you. So please do join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Chex Notes Wednesday. and please remember no mountain too tall and good luck to all

so growing up i was watching monkeys on tv and i saw like how fun they do in jumping around and i described myself i i looked monkey and i set myself on monkeys and i just said sorry guys i have to make the play

Made the catch and threw a cannon back to the infield.

Hey, you're going to catch it. Wait, so do you have... A little bit too hard. Sorry, mate. Do you have monkeys running around the house? No, they have their own house.

Power out.