Muse

Today I was babysitting and one of the kids said, what's on your shirt? And I said, that's a f***ing big dog. The most powerful American figure from the mid-80s to the late 90s. The influence of which you'll never see matched in your lifetime, not a f***ing chance. Now watch out. Because it's time to party.

TBTL! i am brave roller coasters love them scary movies i've seen ghostbusters like seven times i regularly drive through neighborhoods that have only recently been gentrified so yeah i'm pretty much not afraid of anything

i've only ever said i love you to two men my entire life stone cold steve austin and a guy

in a dark club who I mistook for Stone Cold Steve Austin. Make sure your bathroom really has got a toilet that's way too high and kind of big. Also, two plungers. Two plungers says it all.

No, you're going to tell a story. I don't believe that I can bear to listen to another one of your stories right now.

You know, people often come up to me and they say, Andrew, whatever happened to the beads? And I say, bees beads beads beads beads hello everybody welcome to a wednesday edition of tbtl my name is andrew walsh i will be hosting today he might be a little fat he might be a little drunk but

okay he can sometimes yell at us a little but he's the last superhero in the world so you may

recall that the um last you heard i was in possession of about 1700 handmade friendship bracelets that's where the beads come in uh they were made by me and luke and our co-business boy john and of course all of the tens of listeners who came out to our bracelet making party and i had a box of these things again almost 2 000 of these things if you're gonna round up somewhat drastically like I just did and it was my job to get these out to the Midwest where John lives I had to ship them from Seattle to St. Paul Minnesota and I was nervous about doing this because while they didn't have a high monetary value they're literally irreplaceable they're handmade friendship bracelets all of these are going to be shipped out to you guys soon everybody who donated during the TV telethon but I went to the post office the other day with my box and I I told him this doesn't have a high monetary value, but it's really, really important to me. And I'm nervous about it. And it turns out I was right to be nervous. I will tell you guys what's going on with the beads in just a little bit. First, though, let me introduce to you today's special guest and co-host and spiritual advisor. She goes by many names around the globe, but we only know her as one thing here.

What's your name? Fletch. Full name? Fletch F. Fletch.

Hello, Phyllis P. Fletch Fletcher. How are you doing?

I'm good, man. We call that a cliffhanger in the biz. My mouth out. Nope, I said, what? I feel like

Did you say Yes Yeah, I feel very rambly today Sorry that that wasn't totally coherent No, that was great

If I could give it one edit, I would say To not reveal that people will be getting them soon

I know, as I was saying that As I was saying it, I realized The tense with which I uttered that sentence Yeah Can you say anything in a normal way? Sadly, the answer is not yes. Yes. So let me just jump in here. First of all, thank you for doing this.

Oh, thanks for having me. I'm excited to be here.

Good to see you. Yeah, good to see you.

Our little pal.

Is our little pal bingo still harassing you over there?

No, that was so cute.

He was giving you pre-show kisses. That was cute. Right as I started the intro tape, he walked on the table and just leaned over. Started giving you little kisses. That was very sweet.

It was cute.

But I guess he's gone now, which is good, because he'll walk on the audio board and start muting everything. But, yeah, so let's just get right into this.

He's a much more blunt editor.

He's like, shut up. He's like, oh, come on, man. Are you still going on this? Just start the show. So I recorded a little video of me with the box of beads. I know that's not the beads drop, but that's not what I had. And I was in the U.S. Postal Service parking lot about to go in and ship them. By the way, if you were responsible for.

for a package that you were very concerned about, let's say, which service would you use to ship them?

I mean, what can Brown do for you?

Ew.

I think...

Actually, speaking of, we have a voicemail coming up. Oh, great. It might just answer that question.

Oh, great. Okay.

We're going to be checking in with the listeners, and I have some voicemails I want to play for you, including a bathroom story that I think will live in your brain

probably the rest of your life i don't know why maybe it's it must be successful branding and marketing for some reason even though the postal service is the one that comes to my house every single day i think for whatever reason if it were a thing that i felt like i need to track this i need to know where it is at all times something like just my knee-jerk reaction was with no research was UPS I don't know why

UPS what can brown do for you one of the worst slogans that I can possibly think of in American marketing history

but they look so cute in their socks have you seen their socks

I think Luke was talking about this the other day like sometimes you see a real like a real well often they're buff because they're doing that job all the time you see some real snacks out there in their brown uniforms

and in the summer when they wear the shorts and their legs are all huge

yep yep yep I look at that Man, I know that I've said this a bunch. I'm dealing with my rheumatoid arthritis. And I'm, by the way, the past few days have been really good. But I just, I can't remember if I've said this on the show, but like in my adulthood, always feeling blessed to be able to work in radio, even before I was doing like podcasts or behind the mic or whatever, I would always look around at other jobs and be like, when the shit hits the fan, I could do that. Not that it would be easy, but it would be a lot of work. but i could buckle down and do that yeah and just do the work and be sore at the end of the day and do it again until you know i grab that next vine and now as my body fails me i look and i'm just like how do you do that i see somebody getting on a bicycle i'm just like what are you how that shouldn't work these and i were garage sale hopping the other day the this um is it the city of or the neighborhood of broadview i guess it's the neighborhood of broadview that's seattle right had a kind of a coordinated garage sale day. It's where I get all these VHS tapes that I then digitized the commercials for. By the way, did I tell you, I found somebody's hidden porn on one of them? No. No. In the back of my head. So, okay, wait. Now I'm on like 70 different tangents. It's this tape right here. I like to go to garage sales and if I see a bunch of VHS tapes that just have handwriting on them, usually it's something taped off of TV from the 90s. I'm like, can I just have these or I'll give you $5 for the box. Cause I'm going to go and digitize all the commercials and somewhere in the back of my head, I'm always like, yeah, but I'll bet you like, there are some dirty birds out there. Like, I mean, they were even me. Like I didn't, I didn't have access to pornography when I was a kid, but like, you know, I know that I had tapes that had like, you know, probably some VH1, what was the VH1? Like sultry videos on Sundays or something or a, or an MTV spring break that maybe I found especially titillating. I'm like, I know how people operated their VCRs back in the day. And I was like, somebody at some point in between recordings of Mayberry and something else, I'm going to get a little snatch of somebody trying to like, yeah, recorded Skinamax or something. Yes. And this tape. And so I have a new batch of tapes that I got at the garage sale a couple of weeks ago during this coordinated garage sale day. I grabbed probably maybe 35, 40 tapes from this one house, and they're all meticulous. And the problem is there's too few commercials in between because the person was really good at pausing them or maybe had two VCRs and was like renting tapes and then taping it. Like everything from this person. I think it was a guy because I bought the tapes from his mom, but she had to call him on the speaker phone. I don't know where he lives now, but to get permission to give them all to me and her adult son or whatever. And he's like, yeah, fine, whatever. But like this one had 34 Green Acres episodes on it. He was obsessed with Friends, a lot of old movies, Casablanca, the first Pink Panther movie, all kinds of stuff. Wow.

After about, and these are all taped in the slowest setting possible. So this tape I'm holding has like six hours of content. Got you. And the first four hours are all Green Acres episodes. And then suddenly the blurriest, staticiest, Spice 2 channel content, which was some of the most nasty soft core pornography and it was so it was so it was so staticky that you really couldn't even make it out that well except in fast forward mode so i'm just like fast forwarding through all and just like like on basement floor like just in the most like the most

Horribly lit, like gross, like the least turn-on-able content you can imagine. I'm like, dude's just watching Green Acres. Green Acres runs out like, let's get into this. What was I talking about? Oh, I was just going to say I was at the garage sale day, and I was having an especially bad rheumatoid arthritis day, and I'm hobbling around behind Genevieve. I'm carrying this box of tapes. It was like Jobian, and I'm grunting, getting in and out of the car. And I'm looking at – people weren't even using them. They were just selling them or giving them away, like, yard tools. Like, there was a pole saw. And Genevieve's like, well, we kind of need a pole saw. I'm like, I can't even. I can't explain it. Looking at the tools made me hurt. Does that make sense? I literally couldn't imagine even picking it up to kind of look at it, let alone imagine me, like, using this power tool. And, like, I just – I was in this mindset of looking at people. I saw people like, you know, on a basketball court and I'm just like, how are you doing that? You just like lose total perspective. Feeling much better today, though, by the way. They upped my meds a little bit. Anyway, beats.

Yeah, the beats.

Okay, so you're going to go, what can, oh, so all that is to say. Oh, and I would also send it as fast as possible. I can't be a UPS driver anymore.

Oh, oh no.

That's what all that led up to. Buff UPS, guys. I'm too old. I'm too infirm at this point. cross that off the list of things that are my backup plan

what if I want to produce the montage of you like somehow halving to become a UPS guy and you're like lifting weights and lifting boxes and like trying the uniform on and eventually it fits better and better and then by the end you look like handsome Squidward but like in a UPS uniform

I didn't know about handsome Squidward I'm totally that totally missed me Spongebob I know that it's Spongebob which congratulations to me on that that um this bell keeps on finding itself in a place where it has tables yeah get between it there we go uh what were we talking about so you'd go with ups first if you're going to ship

something important yeah yeah and i know that it would be like this box was obviously heavy right it was heavy yeah so it's so that makes it expensive and then if i want to send it like secondaire or something i know that makes it even more expensive but i would at least price that out first because that would be like how i would initially want to do it and if that was too expensive but usps was cheaper then i would want to send it like priority probably but i know even

that's expensive it is pretty expensive how much do you think that box weighed by the way the box was smaller than i thought it was going to be they packed in there pretty well but there was no extra room so they were not sloshing around and there was a fully packed box i had taken all of the the bracelets and vives and i packed them into individual ziploc sandwich bags right 40 bracelets per bag yeah one bag with 11 that was the leftover um and it was like again it was like

1700 plus friendship bracelets in this box yeah um i mean was it like 15 pounds it was 23 pounds

and six ounces i'm holding the receipt here dang okay i did go to the u.s postal service yeah because i thought you know they're good with tracking i just kind of i don't know i just trust them you know i'm yeah you know i'm kind of a big government kind of guy i trust the government more than i trust the corporations yeah they don't have my back yeah um i don't know what my reasoning was but also i'm like well i'll ship it from the place where we have our tbtl po box i can check the po box while i'm there etc yep and i go in with the box which is a uh you know it's like a it's a box that was a used box i think it had produce or something in it i got it from the grocery store and i brought it home but it was in good shape and then i and then i taped it all up i put john's address on it and then i even i secured it with more tape there's one little flaw it wouldn't have been a problem but i taped it up more with packing tape just like really wanted to just make sure that it's um you know as secure as possible and then i take it into the post office and by the way that doesn't have anything to do with the story but it's the first time i've ever gone to the post office no line walked right up to the front i said okay i said to the lady i like talking to the people at the post office i you know i don't force old man chit chat on them but i did sort of say i'm like there's nobody in here and she said

don't jinx it they always say that they always say that so i'm like all right she was a delightful

person and so she's um and i always trust the um the the po workers the post office workers i one time i was in there and an old lady was really giving them uh the business and i was just like trust them and then it turns out they were wrong about something and i was like oh damn it i was rooting for you so hard you were this nasty old lady was yelling at you and i wanted you to be so right i was so bummed but anyway i'm known in there and i tell her i'm like i put it up there i'm like this is heavy i'm like this doesn't have like a huge monetary value but i did say i'm Like, this is super, super important to us. So, like, we really want tracking numbers. We want this to be in very good hands, you know. And so she weighs it. And then she's like, yeah, it's going to be about, like, $66 to ship, which is not too bad, honestly. Yeah, that's pretty good. And I'm like, okay. And then she does something that I find to be kind of odd. She's like, the whole thing's going to be $66, but I'm going to use a bunch of these stamps. She's like, I have too many of these stamps.

Don't tell me your problems. put the one damn sticker on there so there's no question

when you ship something usually they just they'll weigh it, they'll say $66 you pay them and they print out a big white label that says this was $66 and they put it on there and they ship it off right well she's doing this thing where she's like I have too much of a supply of these stamps, we're trying to get rid of them and they're these very expensive stamps they're like $9 and I wrote it down somewhere it's like $9.85 stamps right

that's kind of interesting to it was interesting but like you don't want anything interesting happening with this that

is how i felt but i also felt like and maybe this is where i'm different than let's say luke i don't know would you say that i'm different than luke yes in any way can you think of some ways i can

think of many ways and i think of them every single day when i listen to the show nine dollar

85 cents stamps so they're special they were special stamps for shipping or i can't she explain to me why 985 there oh because there's a certain flat rate for some sort of shipping and so you can buy one of these stamps for it got they featured um some space images taken from like is it the webster or no the weber telescope or something whatever i don't know about space sorry summer listener summer sorry about that yeah i'll beep it out um but uh anyway so so she's like i'm gonna charge you like 17 dollars in shipping and then i'm gonna slap like five or six or however many of these stamps on here to like make up the difference or whatever and i'm like okay that's fine i'm thinking that's not fine right and the longer i'm sitting there i'm thinking that's not fine but i'm also like the longer i'm sitting there the more stamps are sticking to the box or whatever um and then she uh takes the box i'm like okay and i wave goodbye to it and i'm nervous about sending my my beads off to school for the first time yeah and and i'm also walking out thinking hmm those stamps uh and then i take a photo of the receipt and i send it to our business boy john yeah you know because he needs to keep track of these things and he and i think i text it to him and then he immediately is kind of like what's with this why stamps what is this why is it $17 then and I'm just like I I they're using these stamps I send them a link to him he's like those are cool stamps but like why is the why is the receipt like it looks like they credited you $49 then charge you $49 for the stamps like what's going on and at a certain point I just stopped answering his text because it was stressing me out too much I was like I don't have answers and I can't do anything now it's gone yeah I'm like we have a tracking number supposed to be there on monday that would be two days ago supposed to arrive on monday and um i just said you know let me know let me know when they show up uh-oh they showed up they did show up there was no problem at all with the stamps really having said that and i know that i've been really setting you up uh-huh i am very disappointed in the u.s postal service will you please take a look at this box john sent me a photo of what the box looks like when it showed up so I was teasing you guys a little bit making it sound like they didn't show up or there was a problem with the stamps no problem with the stamps it made it the lady was right but and I don't know if you want to flip to the left or the right don't worry I don't have anything sensitive on that phone you'll see another photo of the box as it's open and you can see all the bags of beads in there okay but it looks pretty damn beat up that is not the box that I sent I mean it's the same box but like what are they doing like why is that beat to hell I was pretty pissed when I saw that

It's so funny because it says, ouch, do not drop me. And then it's accordion down the side. Exactly.

Absolutely dropped. And that was not me who wrote that. It was like an old, you know, it was an old box that had something else in it. But I did purposely put, and I'll use this as today's show picture. I'll scratch John's personal information from there. But I purposely, as I put my own label on there, sort of left that there. Ouch, don't drop me so that it looked fragile. You're right. And now it looks like, oh, don't drop. No, you can read what it says. But, yeah, it's accordioned, as you say. What did they do to my box?

That's so funny.

Yeah. But they made it, and that is the good news. Now, here is what John wants me to relay to all of you guys. He's just one man. He is working starting this week. Of course, we're planning for our big Philly show live in Philadelphia, Saturday, September 28th. That's coming up. If you've got your tickets yet, go to tbtail.net.

and get your tickets there they're very affordable we're eating all of the we're eating all of the service fees or whatever so it's $35 straight up exactly we're probably not breaking even on this thing but that is okay come and have a good time we appreciate you guys supporting the show yeah but John is really busy with that but he also really wants to start getting these thank you gifts out to everybody who donated during the THON and of course that was in July and we're in late August Now, he does not want me to make any promises that his ass can't cash in the parlance of Top Gun. But he does think it's safe to say maybe mid to late September, keep your eyes peeled on your mailboxes. You'll be getting your pendants and your hats and your shirts. And, of course, your, well, your friendship bracelets. Although that, I wasn't even going to bring this up either. So John had his own little thing with these bracelets. Let me see if I can find this photo to show you, Phyllis. John went to his own shipping center, I believe. I might be getting some of the details on this wrong, but I think he went to the post office to start figuring out what packaging do I need to send out the individual bracelets, how much is that going to cost, whatever. Then he sent me, he took one bracelet with him as a sample to show them or whatever. Then he sent me this photo yesterday. It's a photo of a deconstructed friendship bracelet that apparently snapped on him. the one sample that he took is now no longer a bracelet but a uh string with a bunch of plastic beads it's a deconstructed bracelet yes he said i took everything to the post office today to weigh things and then this happened and i'm like well what did that happen to all of them and he's like no i just happened to one but the string was too tight like i don't know are these all gonna break i'm like john luke is out this week got a lot on my plate yeah luke's the best want to make in the bracelets too. You're freaking me out. Well, so he says.

I mean, he made 50 in one night.

Oh, sure, but his are the ones that are breaking. No, that's not true. He stopped lying. That is not true. We don't know who's responsible for this.

It would be so funny if John had to remake all of these.

You know, John's probably listening right now, and I'll bet you guys a different adjective than funny. That's my guess on that thing. I always thought y'all were

crazy for doing this, because I know people who love to make these things, and it does seem time-consuming, and these are people who are good at it because they've been doing it for months or years or whatever and i was like there's no way there is absolutely no way and my hands were pretty numb

that week yeah that was like i had that was nuts and all kinds of stuff going on yeah yeah so that

it's like already something's going wrong and then the person who's best at it is luke like no offense but like some offense i was like as genevieve would say some offense like i was impressed i was like wow but then it was so funny following his emotional journey of making the things where it's like you could almost hear that this american life cellos where he was like or the like sex in the city like um you know scoring as carrie's typing on her laptop and she's like i couldn't help but wonder where had my career gone horribly wrong oh that's right as he

was as he was like what is it a good thing is it is it uplifting that i'm doing this or how is it that um how is it that my my broadcast career has led me to making several hundred friendship bracelets in or 50 or 50 yes right but like a small town in southern washington yeah i mean

i was impressed that he made that many in one night i was like i don't think i could do that

Do you think that Did Doogie Howser walk So Carrie Bradshaw could run As you were saying that Have people written about that They should Was that a medium Did anybody publish anything about that in medium I guess I can throw away this I guess I can throw away this receipt now From the US Postal Service

Did you already expense it

I sent John the receipt

He had a lot of questions Keep it until he sends the money to your man.

He's literally like, honestly, that text message is kind of like, he's like, okay, yeah. Okay, well, why is it this? Why is it this? Why is it this? And eventually I'm just like, I can't. I mean, it's totally his job, but I'm just like, I don't know. I just need these things to arrive on time. And at this point, I'm like really freaking out because I'm like, because John is like, stamps. And John's like the most trusting of that. He's like the least cynical. He's like, stamps? You're sending it with stamps? Andrew, I'm like, I'm not sending it with stamps. the lady at the post office is so anyway i am happy to say that they did arrive they arrived in one piece when i sent them there john's out there busting them up for some reason but you will have we have plenty of extras too we have we have more than we need so um by plenty i believe so uh if you

Well, I don't want to make any promises, but we will not be shipping out any broken bracelets. That's for dang sure.

Well, also, John should feel happy of himself because when the day comes that he powers through all of the TBTL archives, he will hear, as I did when I did that, the old days of Luke doing everything himself and except not doing everything because you can't.

Like the posters, like shipping out all the posters.

That's exactly why my hands just did this gesture of rolling up a poster because I have this visceral memory of him being like, OK, and I'm going to send all these posters out. OK, the posters. All right. I'm kind of struggling with it, but I'm going to send them out. And then like, so if you never got your poster, I was like, oh, man.

So that was probably like 2009 or maybe 10 or something like that.

Probably.

And then by the time, so then I joined the show years later, and then eventually I take over more and more production responsibilities to the degree that at some point I gain access to the TBTL voicemail line, which was set up during the radio days. We never changed the number or anything, and so then I became the person who was collecting emails and stuff and voicemails. And so at some point, I don't know how. I'm sure Luke had forgotten the password and we had to hack into it or whatever, but we got it going again. And that gave me access to, like, voicemails going back to, like, 2009 or something. It was pretty cool. A lot of them were unread, which that just happens, voicemail lines. It's kind of hard to stay on top of that even today. But anyway, I would still hear voicemails from people that were just like, I'm calling about my poster? Like, for real, dude? We donated to the show. You said we're all going to get posters. I don't know what voice I'm doing there. That is the perfect voice of every TBTL listener if you put them together. A.I. comes out like that for some reason.

People cussing you out like years later.

Where's my dang poster?

That's so great.

Do I look like I know what a JPEG is? Wait, what?

In a cartoon where someone like screams into a jar and then seals it up and then the other person opens it.

Yeah, exactly. I am bummed. Like that was a very fun thing knowing that I could go back to 2008, 2009 and find like old, old voicemails from even literally the radio days. But we recently had to sort of, it's kind of, it's very uninteresting why, but because of switching some accounts over, we were able to keep our number, but essentially lost all of our archives. So now that was like a year ago or something. So I don't have those. I was even going to look here. I don't know if I can find it on the fly. But there was a great voicemail I just stumbled on the other day of somebody saying, hey, Time Bandits, you're listening to a TBTL from the future. And I'm trying to see if I can.

Is that how that works?

Yeah. Or maybe I've got that. That's great.

I mean, that's a really cool way to think about it.

Yeah. Let me see if I can find this. It was just very charming, but it just sounded so, so, so much like that. those early days of the radio when i was yeah were you you were not listening in the radio days

no in 2014 is when i started listening and then i started catching up at that same time i see well

here i just found i guess this i even labeled this this is from um 2010 so it's not quite the

radio days let me see here hey time bandits you're listening to tvtl from the past shit just got real

I love that energy well anyway so that is the update on the beads and the bracelets I also wanted to spend some time today Phyllis with you going over some emails and v-mails from listeners that have been sort of stacking up here a little bit do I have the email yeah I do oh speaking

of here I go once again with the Female. Every week, I hope that it's from a female. No, man. It's not from a female.

So, did you get to listen to, was it last week's show? Time is a flat circle, man. Was it last week that we were playing all of the pet songs from listeners?

That, yes, that was last week. I'm all caught up, so, yep.

That was so much fun.

That was fun.

And I have more songs What was that one?

Hallie Powell

Oh, that's right

Yeah

We recorded those a couple of weeks ago too So it's not quite as fresh in my memory Oh, that's so cute Oh, there was one also where you guys were like

What is that? Is it this? And it was the bunny hop Oh, somebody And it sounds like that

Somebody just emailed me about that

it sounds like moira rose but it was the bunny hop yes that was a cute one let me see oh it's

so funny that you brought that up it wasn't you who emailed no um but that's so funny let me see uh somebody left a comment on our website saying hey dude i think that that was the bunny hop and they had a link to the song yeah whatever because it's not called the bunny hop right

i don't even know what it's called but we always called it the bunny hop sometimes like when we were in like you know kindergarten or first grade we do it in gym class uh oh here it is this was

sent in by listener lisa it says i think the pet song you were attributing to moira rose sent up is really the tune of, well, The Bunny Hop. I guess it's probably recognized by those older than Luke and Andrew. Sorry, Phyllis. Hey, I am. No, I know what you're talking about now. YouTube 1953 version. Check it out. Let me see if I can get rid of the Doogie Howser music here.

Things sort of caught on. We thought we'd do it for you folks tonight. With a little help from the quintet and the Lee Morrison dancers, it's called The Bunny Hop.

Aw, cute.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

that's so cute the reason i'm stalling here a little bit too although i'm enjoying this jam is now do you remember you don't remember the name of the the pet who is associated with

this isn't it just one that was like kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty or something like that

Probably. I'm looking. I have them all.

It's just like the kit, kit, kit song like that.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sort of, I don't know what to do. I really want to find it, but I'm also really distracted and like clicking through. I did a good job of like taking all these songs and like putting them in their own folders for their own day of the week or whatever in pre-production, but it's making it really hard for me to find things here on the floor. I mean, it might have been Friday. Might have been Friday. Let me see what we got on Friday. We had, do you remember if it might have been Michelle, maybe? Let me try pausing this and see if this is the right one. Otherwise, we might have to give up on this endeavor. I'm sorry. This is a very loose show today, even by my standards.

It's all from Seattle. I'm already sorry this is happening, but you asked for it. I think this is it.

That would be great.

so not inspired by moira rose um hey we got there though yeah that's great the first one

well you helped i appreciate it so um here's the deal though i want to kind of forward promote something here so i thought hey if we get one or two extra songs that come in over the transom then I'll share them today but we ended up having a bunch more I think I got like 5 or 6 or something more pet songs so I think I'm going to hold off and share them with everybody tomorrow and just sort of make that tomorrow's show the whole thing will be more pet songs so if you enjoyed that the listener Navia is going to join me on the show tomorrow to sort of go through these pet songs with me so really looking forward to tomorrow's show that's fun I did want to share something though that is a little bit of sad news We got a note from listener Mary. I met Mary at the bracelet-making party, in fact. And Mary is the person who is the all-star Seattle Times rant and rave contributor. Yes! She has sent in some of the rants and raves that she sent into the newspaper so that we could share them on the air. She has given us advice on how to write a good rant and rave. It was so fun to talk to her at the Eagles when we were making those bracelets. Yeah. But she said, I've been listening to people singing their songs to their pets this week with a kind of a heavy heart. We had to put down our beloved cat, Cisco, just recently. He had medical issues that we couldn't overcome. He was only four years old, fellas. He was the best, cutest, adorable boy you could imagine. He loved everyone, and everyone loved him. As a person with a cat that I adore and who adores everyone and everybody loves him and is about four years old, three in our case, I can't even imagine, Mary. That hurts so much to hear. I'm so sorry. She says, is there a way you could say R.I.P. Cisco? It would mean a lot. Well, absolutely. Rest in peace, Cisco. Yeah. God, that's such a sad story. But I did want to share the love. I know that a lot of listeners have gone through similar things and can empathize with Mary on that. By the way, Mary says he was named after Cisco Morris. Really?

Because I was totally thinking the big purple balls.

Yep. I don't have that drop, unfortunately. My apologies to leave you hanging there.

Yeah.

I don't want to say it, but you know the joke. I'm thinking, okay, all right. I just want to make sure. I was thinking about the flowers. Okay, yes, I know. But the irony that I can't fulfill the promise of the purple balls. Anyway, apparently Cisco, the cat's name, was misspelled. She said nobody checked the spelling. The cat's name didn't have an E on it. But he was named after Cisco Morris. And his surviving brother is named Emmett after Emmett Watson. Yes. Yeah, she says that's a Seattle blast from the past. Who's Emmett Watson? I thought you might know.

Yeah, he was.

a columnist for the seattle pi oh okay yeah what was his deal um for me as a second grader his deal was they had like a series of caricatures of him that they i bet i've talked about this on tbtl before they had a series of caricatures that they would rotate in um to his column uh like

depending on like what he was writing about but they were all of him like it was like yeah like

simple line drawing and if you've ever been to um past like i don't know if it's still there but in the pike place market there used to be an emmett watson's chowder house or something and there was a version of that caricature on their like sandwich board oh okay and um i loved that caricature when i was a kid and i would always cut it out of the paper and i would glue it onto index cards and kind of make my own trading cards with my friend jamie it's cool

Because he had like, what, maybe like five or so that they would rotate through?

Yeah, and we would like... Oh, that's so cute. We called it Curdlymon. I don't know why.

Curdlymon? Yeah. So it's already... So Pokemon's already thing at this point?

No, I was in second grade, so this was the 70s. Oh, damn. Yeah. So it had nothing to do with Pokemon? No. Curdlymon? Yeah. He probably came up with that because I do not remember...

Just like a totally made up word.

Yeah. Huh. Interesting. And it's like, I cut out a new Curdlymon from the paper. and we would like kind of trade him or make him do little dances and stuff. I love that. So that's who I'm at Watson is to me. I think he's kind of thought of as like a kind of local, like semi-curmudgeonly, but like he was a, you know, he had a long, like decades of knowledge of Seattle. Uh-huh. Yeah.

Kind of a Danny West need or maybe less political. I mean, my lens on him is really perfect. Yeah, you're like, I don't know, man. He wrote about Curly Mon stuff.

Yeah, I think of him as more of like an Andy Rooney type. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, you know, maybe less crabby, you know? But that's how I think of him. I mean. He was pretty crabby when he was talking to poor ass.

I consider myself to be an absolutely dead center, normal, average American. God, I hate this guy so much. You've heard this before, right?

I don't remember.

It's my opinion that a great many women have one thing in common. They spend too much time and money fooling around with their hair.

Yes, I do remember that. Son of a... This guy. This guy.

Anyway, well, thank you for telling me. I had a feeling you would know who Emmett Watson is. That's adorable. Actually, I should probably look that up to see if they still have the Emmett Watson illustration.

Yeah, I used to love that. um let's see here oh okay oh does it look semi-familiar like sometimes you'd be in like a kind of navy inspired jacket i think or nautical you know with like a maybe a little like kind of

white captain's hat or something like that i think i see it so simple line drawing sort of but sketched out though i think there may be a little bit they're a little bit more um sketched out than i was originally picturing and there's one of his head sort of hovering above the city it looks like that oh that sounds fancy yeah yeah that's an expensive the ones i'm thinking of are like

the kind from the 70s where it's like a like a you know drawn with like kind of a medium sharpie or something and there's like a big head and a little body and no see that's what i was picturing

no this is something else then this is just a a portrait somebody did of him i'm saying oh i can't find those like sort of iconic things but anyway well i'll dig a deeper into that but mary truly truly truly sorry to hear about your kitty yeah um rip cisco um now phyllis i told you that we had let me see here i have three voicemails i'd like to play for you great are you up for that yes time for that yes and then and then we can thank some donors maybe get out of here but um i uh i'm gonna give you an option we're gonna play them all eventually but i want you to dictate the order of things i told you we have a bathroom story yes we have a story regarding shoes in the house and we have a story about a dirty grandma okay which one would you like to hear first let's do

shoes in the house then dirty grandma and then the bathroom story okay so you said shoes in the

house first yeah uh this voicemail came in i mean this was a i mean it's kind of a perennial topic that comes up because i'm somebody who uh we allow shoes on in our house for guests and i do not like going to houses where i have to take my shoes off i know that i'm on the outside looking in on that for most people it's just my preference and it always you know sort of spurs conversation we got this voicemail from Holly who I believe also comes from a shoes on house at least now

hey there this is Holly in Alexandria period listening to shoe comment oh I listened to this

a really long time ago and I'm not trying to tease Holly about this but Holly is doing something that more and more people are doing these days, which is...

doing a lot of talking into their phone for speech to text and putting the punctuation in there and then forgetting when you're leaving a voicemail that you don't have to put the punctuation in there so if it sort of sounds like holly is talking like stop the titanic has sunk stop

that is why i'm pretty sure hey there this is holly in alexandria period listening to shoe comma no shoe talk it brings to mind that the dog i am fostering brought hookworms to our home period and the only thing that saved me from also getting hookworms because he's a foster dog who did occasionally poop in the house was my aggressive addiction to wearing shoes all the time period wear shoes don't get worms are out wear shoes don't get worms

it's like a world war ii poster doesn't it keep calm carry on that's right that's whoa i love yeah when the message is simple you can retain it right i love that that was a secret duty story too like i was not it took a turn yeah yeah Oh, my God.

Hookworms. That's gnarly, dude. Yeah, that is very gnarly.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Sorry, Holly. Well, no. I'm sorry they had to deal with that, but I'm glad you had shoes on at least. Yeah, seriously. Oh, my God. Now, hookworms are also the thing. I had a friend. I'm whispering because it sounds scandalous. I think I had a friend who went pretty far down the line of researching hookworms as a solution to what? Does this ring any bells to you at all?

No, I have no idea. That sounds great.

I swear there was a time maybe around 15 years ago where it was sort of trendy or people were talking about the idea of purposely getting a hookworm. I don't think it was for weight loss, but maybe like to deal with some sort of dietary issue.

No. No. That sounds horrible.

Yeah, it doesn't sound right to me.

I mean, I guess, okay, but like, yuck, yikes. Oh, no.

I'm just going to type in do hookworms help and then see if-

Let's see what the auto-complete is.

Hookworms could be used to treat several inflammatory and autoimmune diseases. That would make sense because she had like, I don't know, is celiac autoimmune? I'm not sure. I don't remember. But I think it had something to do with autoimmune. Yeah. Okay. Interesting. Whoa, yuck. Hookworm therapy is apparently a thing.

No. Ugh, not for me. No, I don't want it.

No, thank you. Stop it. I'll just die. Yeah, right.

I'll just stay inflamed, however that works.

Yeah, exactly.

Flame on! That's horrible.

That's awful.

Oh, my God.

So what was it?

Like, I don't even know exactly what a hookworm is, but it just sounds like something I don't want.

Yeah. No, I mean, first of all, worms. Yeah. Gross. I don't want any kind of worms. And hook doesn't add anything to it. Like, it doesn't make it better. No. Like a sugar. Okay. Sugar worm. Okay. Oh, okay. I can sort of see that. Acid worm? No, thank you. Hook worm? No, thank you. Barbed wire worm. Ixnay. No, I'm pretty good on that. Seinfeld worm? No. Maybe in the 90s got problematic later on. All right. Dirty grandma? Is that what you wanted next? What's the deal with these worms? By the way, I'm not calling you dirty grandma. Thank you.

Not yet.

That'll be the next time you're on.

Right.

Okay, we got this voicemail from Rachel. Rachel even begins by saying you probably won't play this on the show because it gets a little bit blue it does get blue at the end so if you have kids listening and you don't want to listen to references to sexuality okay maybe skip the next 90 seconds all right

hi guys uh this is listener rachel um you may not play this on the podcast because it's a little blue but um andrew i thought you might enjoy it um i'm listening to your dream talk with genevieve And there was a question you asked about what does it mean if you dream about all your teeth falling out. And I have a story about that, which is not my story, it was my friend's. She was warning me one time when I was going over to her grandmother's house as an adult. We were visiting her grandmother. And she told me that her grandmother was very weird and awkward and gave me the story as proof that when her sister-in-law, who had not yet married into the family, first met her grandmother, they all were having Thanksgiving dinner, and she was just the girlfriend of her, you know, grandson. And so they were talking, and the grandmother said, Oh, you know what? I love dreams. And her, you know, the... The girlfriend said, oh, yeah, well, I had a weird dream last night. I dropped it and all my teeth fell out. And her grandmother looked at her and said, well, that means that you masturbate too much. Oh. In front of the whole family. And then without missing a beat, the grandmother goes, I have that dream all the time. Okay, power up.

It's a real one-two punch there. Yeah, that's great. I don't think there's any evidence that that is what that dream means by the way we were talking about that on the show I can't remember what did oh I think we said that it was because we were taking this New York Times quiz about how much do you know about like dreams or whatever yeah and one of the questions was what does that dream symbolize and I think I said loss of control which wasn't an option this was just two days ago and I've already forgotten but wasn't the answer did you hear that show yeah i did yeah non-determinant yeah it was it was like the

global answer for this was like there's no blanket meaning to any dream like a lot of times people think like oh when you have the dream that you show up at school naked and there's a task that you didn't prepare for and then your teeth fall out like that those are you know those mean that you're anxious about something or whatever and like that makes sense to me but i guess what this what this researched answer showed was that there isn't a answer that applies to all of those

do you have any stereotypical dreams do you have the do you have the teeth falling out you have the naked i never have the naked dream i forgot about that when we didn't talk about that the

going back to school dream any of these i've had each of those at different times and and i mostly had them when i was a kid i had one that was based on something that really happened but it falls into one of these categories and was similar to one I'd had before um which was like the finding out at the last minute that something didn't count kind of dream and what does that mean like uh it's kind of a version of the like showing up and like you have to take a test yeah okay yeah it's like you took the test and you find out that it didn't somehow count or whatever okay I'd never heard of that it's like I'd had versions of that type of dream but like I had a dream that i got a letter right before i was supposed to graduate college that like a class i took to fulfill a distribution requirement didn't count okay i actually got such a letter when i was like a month before i graduated college and i had to go to the dean's office and get a copy of their own catalog to show them that they were wrong oh my god but like my mom was already flying out for

Why are you always having to do that? I don't know. Do you feel like that marks your life as a professional? You always have to say, like, I have the receipts. Like, long before people were using that thing. You always, I feel like you were off having to, like, hold a piece of paper up to people saying, no, it's right there.

I know. I feel like also it's possible I told this story on TBTL before. Maybe. But it was weird then, like, years later to have a dream about that specific thing that was like it was kind of a twist in a way on the like you have to take a final or you're not going to graduate like you know and it was like a very specific reason that I wasn't going to graduate but like I had already fulfilled the requirement but yeah that's the only one I I definitely when I was a kid I had one of those like show up to school look down you don't have any clothes on

you had that I had that when I was a kid yeah that oh that's terrifying and I I know I've had

one about like i don't think all my teeth falling out but like like a tooth suddenly falling out um yeah and i i never really attributed that to you know i was wondering why but like especially knowing that it's a common one that other people have but i don't know yeah why but yeah that that um that grandma one is hilarious because i'm like was that like her projection based on an n of one that like she thinks that's why she has that dream.

Right, but also she's like, I have that dream all the time. Yeah, that's what I mean. I'm like, okay, grandma, would you like to be excused?

Yeah, I know.

You getting through Thanksgiving dinner okay?

That's awesome. I mean, it's like I went from like, ooh, I hate it to like, oh, I love it. That's hilarious.

Do you return to the same places in your dreams ever? Like, is there a place that exists only in the dream world, as far as you know, but you've returned to it more than once and, like, you know, more than one occasion when you're sleeping?

Not that I remember.

No. I think I've got places that some of the details are off a little bit. And usually it does tie into a going back home or a going back. Like, I dream about my childhood home a lot. Oh, wow. I was going to say all the time. Yeah. To the degree that we have recurring dreams, it's not that frequent. So but throughout my life, at least.

At least once a year, if not a couple of times a year, I will have a very vivid dream about me going back to my childhood home and knowing it's the last time I can go there. Wow. Often mowing the lawn, too, by the way. Oh, my gosh. Or feeling like I can't get all the lawn mowed in time or something. Oh, man. But also there are places I feel like that are totally made up, like kind of a college campus-y kind of thing. But I can, like, picture it right now because it doesn't exist in real life, but I've returned to it in my dreams. Wow. And I think that's kind of interesting.

Yeah, that's kind of cool.

Sorry, I was a little distracted while we were talking about dreams there. And you know that I love dream talk. So if I was distracted, you must know that it's important. But I just remembered something else I wanted to share with you before we get into our last voicemail here. And I guess as I think about this, it's sort of a different segment.

This is my box. This is my box. I never travel without my box. Oh, what's in the box? In the first drawer, I keep my magic stones. Oh, what's in the box? Licorice, licorice, blood sweet licorice, blood sweet licorice.

Have some. So this is the what's in the box segment where I usually open up things that have been sent to us by listeners, sent into our P.O. box, which I don't have right in front of me, by the way. Do you remember the P.O. box number? Why would you have it memorized? That would be awesome if I did. Yeah, I'm kind of surprised. It's P.O. box 33687. If you want to reach out to us, The Snail Mail Way, Too Beautiful to Live, P.O. Box 33687, Seattle, Washington, 98133. I love saying that. I always feel like I am the guy who's voicing over the blue screen of the 80s and 90s after you saw the doohickey that they're trying to sell or the time-life collection of Andy Williams' music or whatever. P.O. Box, send a self-addressed stamped envelope to P.O. Box 33687, Seattle, Washington, 98133. No CODs. No CODs, exactly. A couple of, I'm going to say in the past month or two, we learned something very interesting on the show, which is that Luke doesn't know what a CD-ROM is or have any recollection of CD-ROMs.

Come on now. Do you remember that? I do, because, yeah, you guys, now I know what you're going to show me. You guys were talking about how there was a commercial for a CD-ROM about the life and career of Clint Eastwood.

That's right. But actually, sadly, it wasn't even a commercial. It was Cairo TV News basically doing a commercial for it. Right. October 10th, 1995.

Clint Eastwood was planning to write an autobiography when Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen approached the actor director and suggested a different kind of storytelling.

He says, why not put your life and career on a CD-ROM disc? That was the suggestion, and it worked. Okay, Steve Ramel.

That was an entertainment specialist, John Procacino, now, with more on that. John. Autobiographies of the stars are... They're a thing of the past. What? Why? Why when you've got CD-ROM? Do you remember John Procacino? I don't. Put together a comprehensive interactive look at his life and career that begins on May 30th, 1930, the day he was born, to the present. It includes all 53 of his films, old TV appearances, old commercials, and for both film and computer buffs, it's a blast.

so the reason this is a local story is because of the connection to balmer and microsoft right i guess and so and yeah paul allen or paul i said balmer sorry i meant paul allen and um and so this is like a full feature that ends up getting cut off which drives me bananas this is one of the things that i found on one of those vhs tapes that i got at a garage sale we'll continue

it's a party the cyber viewing party for the media and the computer industry to get a first look at Eastwood, an interactive CD-ROM program that has clips from all 53 of the actor-director's films. Go ahead. Make my day. But according to Kelly Curtis, the CD-ROM's producer, Eastwood explores more than just the movies he's made.

It's a two CD-ROM product full of hundreds of audio and video clips. It goes throughout his professional career, but also his personal life. But the most important thing about it is it has in-depth interview about Clint talking about his life, his co-stars, and the movies he's made.

It's just so funny. I mean, you look at this and basically what it looks like is it looks like it's a small offline version of the internet that is just dedicated to Clint Eastwood. You remember CD-ROM, right?

Oh, of course I do, yes.

I was kind of floored when it looks like I don't know what a CD-ROM is. Oh, yeah. You don't remember that part of culture.

I even made a rudimentary version of one for an award entry like not that many years ago really um yeah a project that uh tbtl 10 anna king yeah made um called daughters of hanford and we were submitting it to a uh history a state history award um contest and if you had a digital prod project it had to be entirely self-contained on a cd okay and

Even though we weren't calling them CD-ROMs anymore, it was a data CD and not an audio CD, but it was navigable. It had a menu, and you could click it just like you would on a website, and you would either read or see the photos or hear the radio stories. It would walk you through the different components, and the award entry components were also on there.

And it's, I mean, again, sort of sounds like it's like a little mini website. It was. It basically was. But you put it on a CD and you submit it. Yeah, it was like. Sounds slick, actually.

That's pretty cool. Not every editor is that bitch, okay? Right, right. And I am. And so I made that. And then I, then Josh actually, or no, one of Anna's colleagues designed a label. and then I like stamped the labels on there and delivered the whole shebang to the Washington State Historical Society where she won and she got to be pinned by Chris Novoselic because he's on the board of the State Historical Society oh nice well congratulations to both of you I know that was several years ago but that was my one experience like making something that you could I guess call a CD-ROM but yeah even as I was making it I was like this feels very retro like it feels like I shouldn't have to do this but I'm doing it because this is what the rules say

I have to do but anyway if there are two things that you like doing it is following rules and

submitting awards right yeah just being like in your face with this award entry slash college

catalog yes that I do like to do that the reason I'm you saw me googling around here you saw me at least distracted once again um it's because I was listening to your story sort of but mostly thinking about myself um sure one of my charming traits yeah no i as you're talking about that i remember that i had a connection to a cd-rom too and i'm sort of just recalling this so i went to kent state university of course kent state had the the shootings of the four students by the national guard back that was 1970 and so i was there for yeah it would be 2000 i was there for the 30th anniversary of that so you know it's always remembered on a yearly basis there as well it should be um and memorialized in some ways and there are you know demonstrations for lack of a better word um but uh the 30th anniversary especially there's a lot of stuff going around to sort of commemorate the date and I'm just remembering that some college group and I'm trying to think who my friend was who would have hooked me up they knew I was in radio I was doing zero mic you know anything on the mic at that point except for maybe school projects for my radio and tv classes but yeah they basically commissioned me like i mean i don't think they paid me or anything but like they asked me to be the voice of the kent state shootings 30th anniversary cd-rom and the reason i was just googling around is i wonder if that exists anywhere i must have a copy of it somewhere in my various things i'm sure it's at your school

library. Genevieve could probably get it from interlibrary loan if it's not in

the research desk. Oh, is that all the way

from Ohio? If they loan it out, yeah. Really?

I'm looking on a website here. I saw something about a CD-ROM listed on one of these things, but let me see here. There was a, I'm on a videotape, a news story on CD-ROM currently under development about May 4th. That was from 1994. No, I'm not sure. I don't see it listed in the libraries, but that certainly was something that i needed to do on the podcast good lord okay wow let's get back

i mean that's cool to know about though i'm glad that memory came up because this is and this might be foreshadowing i'm not sure but this is what always happens when you mention something like that someone listening to this finds it yes exactly yeah i'm glad it came up well that's

exactly why i did bring this up because and i think you see it sitting there um so that whole Clint Eastwood story about the CD-ROM that we were laughing about. Listener Brandon, let's see here, newish listener. What does newish mean? Oh, look at Brandon. Brandon wasn't after these messages listener. He became a TBTL listener.

We call that converting fringe to core, okay?

We are, we celebrate this. Yeah. We celebrate this. You're an ad counselor first in the 10 seconds never forget it thank you brandon uh but brandon said it really just i heard you talking again about the uh cd-rom and it just i had to look it up and so i went onto ebay and i found it and that is why i played the uh what's in the box music before because what was in the box that i got at dude the uh at the post office yesterday was this eastwood it's the exact big

box that I see in that

news story. It's prominently displayed on top of an old 486 computer. in that news story there it is oh my god okay when i walked in because of the shape of the box i

thought it was a puzzle it looks like a puzzle you're right wouldn't that be weird if i had a clint eastwood puzzle you know i used to love his early those early like spaghetti western movies he did like those three that like the you know the good the bad and the ugly franchise essentially um and it just kind of bums me out what a what a a-hole he became right it's like and now i just really i don't like like i was kind of like now i and by the way brandon i really do appreciate this and i have a little i have a little disc drive that i can plug in i at some point i can't do it now on the air but i will click through that thing um but also like i'm trying to figure out like you came in you're like huh andrew's got a clint eastwood puzzle that doesn't really align it's just it's clint eastwood pointing to an empty chair um the stage of the rnc that's

what the puzzle is look at look at the design of the of the labels actually on the discs

isn't that kind of cool oh so yeah they take the o in eastwood to make it uh the the first disc one and then eastwood has two in it and that's how they indicate the second disc isn't that funny wood too that is kind of cool yes thank you i hope you didn't pay a pretty penny for this brand and i wonder what it went for on ebay but i do appreciate it brandon says it's still in perfect edition and i thought it might be a fun addition to your collection not sure if it's uh content for air i don't know i just did about five minutes of googling around uh that was great content i assume at least uh one eastern block algorithm would flag it for ip violations yes exactly uh it says it requires eight megabits of ram do i have eight megabits of ram uh i'm not sure anyway i really do appreciate that it was very fun to go to the post i'll be honest too i knew that Brandon had sent something and I knew that he had bought a special like media box for it but when I showed up at the post office I got this on Monday I think I had forgotten exactly what it was so even though he told me what he was sending just so you know Brandon you delighted me a second time when I opened the box I'm like that's right it's the Eastwood

thing also very frugal of him to send it media rate good for you

yes yes and it got here pretty quickly so thank you again Brandon that's great okay oh that's funny I think we have another voicemail here right from danny regarding bathroom stories i don't think it needs much of a set oh okay this isn't and i think danny will do a really good job of setting this up i don't have to reiterate it but i will um when we were doing our crossover episode with megan and lindy from the text me back podcast there was a moment where lindy realized that her fancy neighbor came into her house and wanted to use the restroom and found a turd in the toilet.

Yeah, that was her guest and longtime friend, Isolde.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who I know also, so that made it extra funny. I said neighbor, but more guest. Do you remember Lindy's reason for having that turd in the toilet? Oh, gosh. She meant to flush it later for some reason. I don't know if it was a plumbing thing or what it was.

Was it that there's limited hot water or limited water, and there was like a situation where someone had just taken a really long shower or something like that? I feel like it was something related to that. It was something related to shower water, I'm pretty sure, and not wanting to use up all the water. Yeah, something like that. Does that even

make sense? And Lindy's, Lindy meant to flush it. She's not, we want to make very clear about this, she's not somebody who's just leaving little droppings around the house, little presents for people. No. She was mortified, and I believe she got this news on the air while we were recording i think she got a text message i could be wrong about that um anyway that inspired this

message from danny hey boys danny i was just listening to the crossover episode very very good highly enjoyed it um uh lynn talking about uh leaving a phantom turd in her own bathroom that reminded me of a poopy oopsie that i had myself one time uh let me preface this by saying that i do not enjoy hosting people in my apartment at the best of times um chalk it up to living in new york and space is limited but it is compounded by when my in-laws come to town now i love my in-laws but they are lurkers uh they will just sit in the living room each on their own separate computer just not talking and it's just so uncomfortable sometimes uh and And also, bathroom time is my time. That's where I do some of my best work. I will sit for tens of minutes at a time reading articles with a hairdryer on my back like it's my own personal space heater. I love it. My happy place.

I've never heard that movie before. I haven't either.

I mean, hairdryer?

can get really warm and depending what kind of hair dryer is i could see that being like relaxing but also maybe he needs a toto that has like the warm air situation like the i i've never had one myself but um it's like a bidet type it's like a japanese toilet that has a bidet type situation built into it and so he said that it was aimed at his back um but like if he's trying to get warm air other places he could get this total situation i mean i think that the ones that

do that are expensive treatment though this is like down market spa treatment as he's gonna go sit on the throne for a while and just warm himself up yeah he just wants that's part of

is relaxation aspect to it.

Hey, more power to you, Danny.

Yeah, and just make sure to keep your knees up. Don't let your legs fall asleep if you're going to sit there that long.

Danny, if you wear shorts, we can see the little pink dots right above your knees, by the way. You know what I'm talking about? No. You don't know what I'm talking about? When you're sitting there on the toilet and you've got your knees. Oh, you put your elbows on your knees? Your elbows are on your knees. That's funny. And then you get up, and you got those little red dots right above your knees.

I don't think I've ever thought to do that.

Oh, yeah. That's funny. I can't hold up my own body. Okay, back at the end.

My time. That's where I do some of my best work. I will sit for tens of minutes at a time reading articles with a hairdryer on my back like it's my own personal space heater. I love it. It's my happy place. So I digress. All that to say, my in-laws are in town one time, and I just had a luxurious time in the bathroom. But I'm so self-conscious, and they're right in the other room, that I'm just like, well, I can't just walk out of the bathroom 20 minutes later. So I'm like, okay, I'm not going to flush, and I'm going to take a shower. And then I'll flush after, so that they think, oh, okay, he just got out of the shower and peed. Weird, but less weird than the alternative. naturally I forget to flush and about, I don't know, maybe an hour later my mother-in-law comes out of the bathroom and I have this horrible realization of what she must have seen when she opened the lid of the toilet never spoken about it, it was never addressed, there are times when I still think about it when I'm in the room with my mother-in-law it haunts me to this day and no joke we literally moved soon after that to a place with two bathrooms because I died a little inside. That's it. That is a power out.

Danny is a ghost. That's one thing. Danny is not what Danny used to be. Danny is a ghost of his former self as he is just cursed to wander the earth with this the rest of his days, just rattling the toilet chain. So anyway, I feel you, Danny. Honestly, I feel like I'm cursed with your story now. I feel like I have sort of somehow absorbed your story, and it's now our story as well. We all, we're all, je suis Danny.

Right. I feel like Lindy's story was so similar to his that that's part of why it must have been triggering for him in a way to listen to that.

Yes, good call.

Yeah, because I think a shower was involved, and it was the, like, well, I'll flush it after. And I'm like, there's something about a shower that, like, they can be so freeing and relaxing. And a reset. Yeah, why would you think you'd remember to flush the toilet after? I mean, I guess he knows that now.

Yeah, you're not the same person leaving the shower as you are who entered the shower. Totally.

I like that he called it a poopy oopsie.

It was a poopy oopsie.

That's so great on so many levels. And I like if I were the sideline reporter for this football game, I would have so many questions like be like, um, like. Did he feel compelled to tell his spouse that this had happened?

You know, I kind of assumed the answer to that was yes. They moved quickly after.

Yeah. And I'm like, was that the stated reason or the tacit reason?

for oh right yes exactly or yeah good call was like a more subconscious whose idea wasn't to

move i wonder if also did the frequency change of the in-laws visit um you know did they like start spacing them out more did they suggest maybe they'll stay

a hotel yeah which by the way i would highly recommend i mean anyway give people their space amazing yeah i mean i my question is danny said they moved not long after was there a moment where he considered just moving himself just like just leaving just like leaving without not even leaving a note just disappearing and changing his name just unzipping that hole in the universe floor

and just slipping out into it.

Taking a kerchief, packing some necessary supplies into it, tying it to the end of a stick and just riding the rails.

Changing his identity on the internet. Yes. Everything. But the one thing he kept was the show.

The one thing that he kept was the horror.

Thank you for being a tell.

All right, let's thank some donors, the people who make shows like this possible. And then we do have to get out of here. I'm looking at the clock. It's almost 2 o'clock as we're recording this. If I don't get the show posted by 2, people start to worry a little bit. Yeah, they do. So nobody worry. We're fine. Yeah. We got to get out of here and get this up on the internet. First, though, let us thank the people who made today's show possible, like Byron Orne of Shelton, Washington. What do you know about Shelton?

Oh, well, that's where the Burbanks live, I think, right? Is that technically the town? I guess.

How do I not remember that I probably had wrote down that address so many times And prepped for that fun drive

I think it's in Mason County And they have Like some really Funky Antique shops in Shelton

Oh really? Ooh I did not get to do that Ooh I don't like that

Yeah like the kinds that are tiny and just Packed

Oh god I love that It's 100% potential yeah right when you get out of the car and you see it it's like it's all potential at that point yeah all of the treasures everything that could make me whole again could be hiding in a cubby hole in this flea market i love a flea market yeah uh thanks to jenny brown in somerville massachusetts now i know somerville you got your davis square there somerville some of my literally happiest memories of my young adulthood in somerville massachusetts thank you jenny hope you're taking advantage of everything somerville has to offer um connor wells is in Vancouver, Washington.

Oh, fun.

Thank you, Connor. We got a duo here, Christine and Matt Woodward of Renton, Washington.

All right, yes.

So that is exactly where the Seahawks are right now.

Oh, yeah, training camp.

Training camp, indeed. When does the season start? Like maybe a week from Sunday or something?

I don't remember. I think we're getting kind of close. But yeah, isn't Renton the free ladder district?

Oh, that's where Genevieve had a line on a ladder, which we still have is the most dangerous thing in our house. Like, we'll give her $40 to buy a safe ladder. Anyway, thank you, Christina Matt. That is not your fault, by the way. I do not blame you for the janky free ladder that Genevieve is trying to kill me with. Sydney Goldberg of Tacoma, Washington. I love Tacoma. Thank you, Sydney. And Greg DeVore of Lake Taps, Washington. Now, I'm sure I ask Luke this all the time. Lake Taps, where are we talking here?

I forget.

You don't know either, huh?

No, I have a feeling it's north of here, but I could be wrong.

Oh, my gosh. Well, first of all, I'm seeing photos of it. It's absolutely beautiful, and it looks like it might be. I could be wrong about this, but it looks like it's actually maybe north, south, east, west. No, no, no. Sorry, sorry, sorry. East.

Okay. That makes even more sense.

Maybe east of Tacoma, though. Oh, okay. Not north of us. If this is right. I was loud wrong. Maybe Bonnie Lake. Oh, okay. All right. Okay, cool. Could be wrong about that. But anyway, Greg, DeVore, thank you so much. That's nice. Wherever you sent it from, your donation did make its way to us. And that is the important thing.

That's right.

Thank you to Byron, Jenny, Connor, Christine, and Matt, Sydney, and Greg for supporting TBTL. We do appreciate it. And also, we will know if you listened to the show when Luke was out, because if you email me and say you didn't hear your name on the show, I'll look it up, and I'll be Like, that was one where Luke was out and I was hosting. And then I have to say, oh, we did thank you. You skipped my show.

Oh, oh.

Oh, that's happened before. I rub it in, too. Oh. Oh, I rub it in.

I was like, where is this journey taking me? Oh. Oh, you didn't know what I meant by that. Yeah, no, no, no. I get it now. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love sending an email. I'm like, actually, we did thank you. Luke was out that day and I was hosting. I appreciate you skipping that episode, friendos. I really have given people a hard time about that before. You. I love it. Can you believe that I would give somebody a hard time, Phyllis? Does that seem like... I feel like I should have had kids.

Yes.

I could have really given them a hard time.

You could. You could and you... would i could have damaged them so much dear oh dear phyllis is there anything you need to let

listeners know before we get out of here man especially the tacoma reference made me think about um uh going to honk fest tacoma september fest yep it's like a brass brass band like street brass band festival on saturday september 14th uh and look for the ballard brass nice because you might see Gus Knisley. Knisley, the famous Gus. Right. You know him. Yes.

He's a kid I've harassed.

Exactly. And if you love a high school marching band formation playing 80s tunes, you'll want to go to the Ballard High School homecoming game on Thursday, October 3rd at Memorial Stadium.

Nice. All right. Well, congratulations to Gus and good luck with all that this year. Sophomore now, right? Nope.

Freshman.

Freshman. freshman sorry yes wow still though congratulations all right fellas thank you so much for doing this with us man thanks for having me it was a lot of fun this was a real lazy river kind of show man i didn't really know what i was doing this whole time but we got there it had a lot of laughs thanks everybody like the bracelets we got there exactly sorry i sort of misled you at the beginning of the show but i'm doing anything to uh get listeners or keep them on the hook all right thanks everybody phyllis oh help me get out of here okay um let's see i like i mentioned earlier We will be back here tomorrow. Listener Navia is going to be joining me on the show. And we have a whole bunch more of just adorable listener pet songs to play for you guys. So we'll be doing that tomorrow. That is Thursday. Oh, and we'll have Blursdays. Blursdays are back, baby. So tune in for that. In the meantime, have a good rest of your day. And remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

Power out.