Muse

that's funky i like that thank you yes yeah that's a fun card where does the music come from there's a small chip and speaker set that goes into the back of the card was it a cd no it's more like a a chip and speaker set that we uh it's very small and it's about the size of your thumbnail and We just put it right inside the back of the card. Like headphones? No, this is a computer chip that's devoted really to one function only. The playing of the song when we open the card. And then I guess you could say its second function is turning off at this point. Like a Walkman? No, it's not like a Walkman at all. TBTL!

Okay, stop. I feel like I'm watching regional theater, you guys. God, am I in the Cleveland Playhouse or something? Let me ask you something.

Why would a review make the point of saying someone's not a genius? You think I'm especially not a genius?

And for our viewing pleasure, I packed Terms of E. Oh, love it. Then we're gonna bring it up with a little fried greens to the T, and then Hope floats with Sandy B. Yes. Does somebody die in that one? They die in all of them. This is making me sad, and I hate being sad. Hey, everybody stand by. Here we go again.

All right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Tuesday edition of TBTL, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Hey, is it too early to get a fish sandwich? My name's Luke Burbank. I am your host. I'm helping them gums, telling them lies. Coming to you from the Matrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia, where we're having a nice little momentary break in the wet weather and are, I would say, perfectly situated to bring you episode 4,625 in a collector's series.

Let the fun begin.

We are today, we didn't get to it yesterday, but today we are going to get to this list of five best candy-eating experiences, I believe.

Ever since I was told that corn is real, it tasted good.

Sure did. We're going to talk candy today on the program, and we're going to talk to this guy, longest-running co-bro of the show, maybe best known, for his depictions of the tall ships. It's Don Bondarly, king of the dirty songs. Also known as Andrew Walsh. Good morning, my friend.

What does that young person say in that drop you just played?

I know you don't like it because it's that corn song, you know. I was trying to find something that tasted good.

Ever since I was told that corn was real, it tasted good.

Ever since I was told that corn was real, it tasted good. I remember that. You know, I got a bad rap for that. This is probably an inappropriate time to bring it up. But people are like, I don't want to get into the accusation. But there were accusations of racism against me because I didn't find that. Oh, seriously? Do you not remember that? That we got an email from a listener.

I just thought you were maybe being like anti-cute kid. I didn't really think it was a racist thing.

Yes, I'm literally accused of saying, like, you like the white kid who doesn't say TV. I would argue you like the white kid less. Well, the thing is, I don't dislike the corn kid whom we just heard. I am less enthralled with the series that that came out of, which is this guy who's, like, probably in his 20s or 30s going around basically doing a modern TikTok-y version of Kids Say the Darnedest Things. And my complaint with it had nothing to do with the adorable child who likes corn, for goodness sakes. My complaint was that it seemed like the cute kid accidentally saying something cute on television seemed a little bit different than a series dedicated to going around trying to get kids to say silly things so that then you can go viral for it.

You know what I mean? I see. So you don't have a problem with kids say the darndest things or art link letter or something like that where they interview kids.

Well, I just mean that this new, basically, that thing went, no. So I have no problem with any of that. You can make whatever content you want. But when we play on this show a lot of tape of kids saying cute things, but it seems organic, I feel like this series was trolling around. Yeah, nobody was trying to get, they put a microphone in front of a kid and he ended up saying it.

And also he's white, so you like him for that.

And then there's this other series with this guy with glasses who goes around And he's like, he's the whole point is I'm going to keep asking kids questions until they say something goofy. And so I didn't feel like it was as organic as some of the viral stuff. It seemed like something that was trying to go or trying to go viral. And then it did go viral. You can see I'm.

losing ground here i feel attacked by you and the listeners well this sir is a classic petard hoisting upon yourself i know i didn't know any of that stuff i i just that email lives large in my head ah well i could see why i and i was kind of ribbing you but i didn't realize or i had as we were now learning so frequently on the show maybe i knew it and forgot but um i didn't realize that that was the allegation that's a kind of a serious allegation and i wouldn't give you i wouldn't give you grief on that a i know that to not be who you are and b i would also be

stressed out by that allegation like imagine me not liking a kid saying something cute because of his because of his ethnic background like that is just like not like maybe gender but not not race

do you think that girls can be funny um are we going to talk about candy today my young friend

no we're just getting started let's talk more about tomorrow on the show and culture five candy today on tbtl we talk about the intersection of race and candy um tell me about this this i

didn't realize by the way that we have we're sitting on a trove a trove of lists in general and particularly a trove of lists from my actual brother yeah uh not only an unpaid uh producer on tbtl but he's actually paying to play he's donating to the show in order to be allowed to also help provide content that's a that's next level i thought you're gonna say not only is he

an unpaid producer for tbtl but he's an almost unpaid producer for a very large radio station here in seattle that also bothers me let me hashtag give david a raise um all right so yes so uh as i mentioned yesterday on the show when we were supposed to play this voicemail but i went on too long um we were talking about how listeners have gotten into sending us lists of things top five lists specifically of various experiences that we have in life i love it it's keep on sending them you can email me voice memos or if you want to leave a voicemail you can email me andrew at tbtl.net that works you can call our voicemail line at 206-414-8285 i like keeping this tradition going and we're spending some time this week going through the many many submissions that we've received many many as you said from your brother himself who sent us five i believe And this one was Top 5 Candy Eating Situations. So if you want, without further ado, I'll just start David's voicemail. And then maybe we do donors afterwards. Does that sound like a good plan to do? Yeah, love it. All right, sounds good. David, let's get started here.

How about Top 5 Candy? I don't mean five different types of candy. Everyone has their own candies that they enjoy. I mean the top five situations in which you're eating candy. These are really important to me. I don't feel like I ever grew up. I love candy. And let's start with number five, that being after party candy. You know when you have a party, specifically if it's around a holiday, maybe it's around Halloween or it's around Christmas, and you get some candies, you put them in a bowl. They're for the guests. They're for everyone to kind of grab as they go. They're never getting all eaten up. You always are going to have leftover candy. And then it's like, what do I do with this? Well, I eat it, shamefully, in a dark kitchen as I'm cleaning up the dishes after the party, right? And it's your little treat. You get the treat for hosting the party, and it's that candy. Number four.

Now, wait a moment, Andrew, because he's saying these are the best candies, but then he's talking about shamefully eating the candies. Oh, that's an interesting way of parsing this. And I don't want to put my brother on blast here, but I just feel like, A, I don't think there should be any shame around it. Although maybe that's his kink. I don't know. I mean, I know a lot about my brother. I don't know everything about my brother. But I would say that, like, yeah.

Maybe what about secretly? Maybe not shame. Maybe shame is the wrong word there. But, like, that idea. So I do the same thing with sausage, basically. After a party, I don't usually have candy out at parties, but if I've been grilling for a whole bunch of people and then they're all downstairs like Genevieve's entertaining our guests in the basement post-dinner or maybe everybody's left, I'm now cleaning up and I'm taking a chunk of kielbasa here, a little bite of bratwurst here as I'm wrapping stuff up. I do that. And there is something, if not shameful, how about surreptitious?

Yeah. Not shameful, but secretive But secretive in a way that it's a fun secret It's a secret you're keeping between you and the kielbasa You and the candy That David is talking about

Me and my kielbasa Have so many secrets Top five Sausage experiences Back to candy

You get the treat for hosting the party And it's that candy Number four Here we go.

is free candy. What I mean is that candy that is in a bowl at really any place, the doctor's

office, the, uh, any. What kind of doctor's giving away candy, by the way? The dentist

giving away a bit of honeys? Doctor feel good? Yeah. Kind of reception front desk area. They'll have candy. And this is not a holiday thing. This is year round. Oftentimes these places will have candy and that's a little candy that you get for doing your appointment for being there working your stuff doing your thing you get a little candy as a treat third would be wait one

second we um can we talk about now you the other day you had your free candy you got from sweet

water yes i was very jealous i want to eat one now now that we're talking about can i do one of

these you trust me enough to eat a candy absolutely i do i trust you implicitly um Um, I would say that the best free candy that you get, and this is less at, like, usually at, you know, like a store or, I don't know, a reception area, and more like what they would put in the restaurant bill, but you know those Andes ones? Yeah, I'm wondering if that's going to be coming up. Okay, because I was going to say, in much the way that I say that the Subway Sandwich Corporation, or whatever they're called now, is keeping the Sun Chips company in business, I've rarely seen a Sun Chip outside of a Subway sandwich buying experience. I feel like restaurants are keeping the Andy's Mints business. You rarely see people eating Andy's Mints outside of a I-just-paid-the-check kind of situation.

What about on your pillow? I feel like there was a time when you would find an Andes mint on your pillow at a hotel.

Maybe, but I feel like that whole thing has – they're too busy saving the whales now and not cleaning your room and not washing your towels to come in and put a mint on the pillow. I can't remember the last time, Andrew, and I stay in a lot of hotels. I can't remember the last time there was a mint on my pillow.

Yeah, me too, but you travel more than me. They should bring it back. How irritating – I know that we have listeners who hate it when we eat on the show. Am I able to do my – this root beer barrel I'm eating is so good. I haven't had one of these in so long oh they're so flavorful am I unbearable to listen to right now should I spit it out the unbearable lightness of being here I'm going to eat this a little bit more and I'll let David

you sound like your normal amount of annoying

oh okay

the good news is that this is a level that's been set for the listeners some funny tweets I sent out about 10 years ago oh you want to hear about some funny tweets I sent out

All right, here we go.

I'll see your tweet and lower it by 1,300.

Here we go. Third would be movie theater candy. Now, obviously you have to get some candy when you go to see the movies. That's a quintessential part of movie going. And for me, the candy aspect of the movies is what is the candy that is going to last the longest throughout the movie? If I get a candy bar, I'm eating that thing immediately. That thing's not making it through the first trailer. What you have to do is you have to get the Milk Duds, the Skittles, the Peanut M&Ms, something that there's a large quantity of that you can kind of be munching on a little bit at a time. And that's so fun because then you also get, as you're eating the popcorn, you also get some candy and you get to kind of mix and match. You can have a little popcorn, you can have a little candy, you can go back and forth. it's number three's movie theater candy

so you wait I heard you expressing your displeasure with that

I'm going to spit this out now but this barrel got to the point Luke that you were talking about yesterday it's got the little split in it the little candy split and it's hurting my tongue you know what I'm talking about alright that's gone

he spit it into an empty tissue box

I was going to spit it into a tissue but I don't have any tissues because my box is empty so I just spit the thing right into the, now that box can go away. That was really good, by the way. It tastes just like root beer. I don't need candy in a movie theater. In fact, I have a question for you. For people who do eat candy in movie theaters, your brother mentioned eating a candy bar? Is that even a thing? I could only picture people eating like Milk Duds or those Junior

Mints or whatever. Oh, I've eaten a Nestle Crunch. I've eaten a Nestle Crunch

at a movie before. Really? Just like straight up a candy bar? They sell those. Yeah, they sell

candy bars, but I am with David on that, so I am a, in fact I would say it's a one of the sort of semi few times I eat candy is at the movie theater and it's part of what I'm looking forward to. And I do the same thing. I get a popcorn. I get, uh, I told you I tried milk duds a while ago cause I was seeing if I could reconnect with my youth. Bad idea. Um, but, uh, I'll do like a peanut M and M or something, but I try to do something that I can sort of, um, uh, sort of parcel out, take my time with so that it's not all gone by the by the you know before the the movie even starts uh becca has a friend who has this she does not allow herself to eat one bite of anything until the movie has started

that's oh wow that is some discipline i can't do that no i'll be i mean i've never gotten through

an entire movie popcorn thing because first of all the small is enough for me but i always think but what if i run out in there so then i get the medium and then between me and becca we might eat a quarter of that i also get extra butter oh wow i'm but do you get extra butter um i don't get

extra butter i just get the when they say do you want butter on it i say yes or sometimes i ask for

maybe my problem is i ask for extra butter so it's so rich it's so delicious but i can't get

a lot of it down um you know at the amc that you mentioned uh recently on the show the one that i go to at um at uh here here at oak tree in my neighborhood they have your own they you put the butter on yourself they have a butter station but i don't know i don't think i overdo it on that and also i just might be more of a glutton or a glutton in a different way but like i'm not interested i think your brother hit on something though too he mentioned like mixing it with the popcorn and getting it like a salty sweet experience i'm not into salty sweet experiences i am into salty experiences first and foremost and then on occasion a sweet experience i don't want those things mixed i'm sure i've told you get a coca-cola what do you go for with your drink okay that is a sweetness that is no no actually i wasn't trying to burn you on that i was just curious what you're washing it down with true story i am washing it down with again if we're talking about the amc where i see a lot of movies because it's so close they have one of those machines where you can mix and match a million different combinations graveyard and so i do i make a graveyard and i have a whole thing you know it's got to be a lot of a lot of root beer a lot of orange a little bit of cola i usually skip the sprite although i got a listener telling me one time the sprite is key there and i definitely like some mountain dew or i think they have mellow yellow there so i'll mix all of those together especially if genevieve and i are not sharing i don't think genevieve goes in for the graveyard so if we're sharing a soda then i have to do something more conservative gotcha but no candy for you no candy like i don't like um like uh chocolate-covered pretzels for that reason or chocolate-covered nuts or whatever. I like my sweets over here. I like my salty over here. And so, therefore, if I'm in a movie theater, I'm just going pretty hardcore on the popcorn. And I'm getting a large, and most of it is gone before the movie begins because this is how my doctor told me to do it.

Number two is a fun one for me. It's running errands checkout candy. So when you're out running errands, you're grocery shopping, you're doing kind of whatever, And you're in the checkout aisle and you see those candy bars and you think, I've been running out and about all day. I've been buying things that we need, doing all the things that I need, checking off my lists. I deserve a little candy. Maybe you're going in between two stores. You get a candy at one of the stores and then that's for your ride to the next store. And that kind of gets you, keeps you going on your journey.

Okay, so it sounds like a little break there I don't think I've ever succumbed to that Or whatever the word would be Or taken advantage of that situation I don't think I'm candy forward enough in my life

You mean the impulse buy candy Yeah I've done that before Because, yeah, I've been out running errands And I feel like I deserve a little sweet treat for this That for me would usually be a Twix type of situation Or a Snickers

Oh, interesting, okay Yeah I remember my – I did not have a candy bar until – well, I was old enough to remember my very first candy bar. And I was at some sort of like kind of – Really? In your life. Yes. And because of that, that remains my favorite candy bar of all time. And most people, I think, disagree with this for their own taste, but it's Three Musketeers. And I remember I was out with my friend Tony and his dad. And his dad knew somebody who ran like a fancy hotel somewhere in Cleveland or maybe it was Akron or something. And so we took a little journey. I remember it was evening time and he said, bring your swim trunks because this place has an indoor pool. We weren't staying at the hotel. Tony's dad was just going to do some business or something. But me and Tony for a couple of hours kind of had the run of this hotel where we swam in this fancy pool. We ordered some sort of food that you made a friend named Tony. I made a friend.

His name was Tony. He lived in your throat.

He kept saying, hello, Mrs. Torrance. And I was like, come on, Tony. You're supposed to be a real person. Anyway, I remember we got some meal that came with a little mini bottle of Heinz ketchup, and I thought it was so cute. Amazing. That's when your love of scale started. Luke, I never broke the seal on it, and I saved it for years and years and years until it started to be brown. Because it was actually glass. It was an actual small glass bottle of ketchup, and this would have been the 80s. And I loved it, and I kept that. And then after whatever we had for dinner, I think we were allowed to go to the...

vending machine and buy a candy bar and i literally never i'm not saying i never had candy before but i'd never had a full-size candy bar before and i got three musketeers and then i just got locked in that's my that's my do you even go for a three musketeers it probably doesn't have as much

adventure about the would you what would you call the you know it's obviously chocolate on the outside and what do you call the middle part that's what they do get maybe right yeah i've never been a fan of like i like snickers a lot more because i like is that caramel that's in a snickers probably with yes and peanuts and nougat yeah the nougat the all nougat of the three musketeers it was a little airy for me it was a little kind of like i don't know i like something it was it just felt a little bit like i don't know i was biting into a very sweet almost not marshmallow-y but you know what i mean like listen in a pinch i've certainly i've had a few three musketeers don't get me wrong but um but but if i have my choice of a few things i probably i think the first my first candy bar memory ever that i remember buying was at craigan's pharmacy on aurora at 77th and aurora um and i remember it was a charleston chew and also which is in a terrible just a truly awful candy bar i think really oh really i had my first one a couple of years ago and i loved it oh really it was i was literally like i i could i remember asking the woman i had again that i remembered i'd never bought a candy bar before i had some amount of pocket change i didn't know how much anything cost and i remember just picking up different candy bars and going can i get this one could i get this one like which ones of these are the amount of money that i have with me of whatever i had 15 cents or something 20 cents and when she When I pointed at the Charleston Chew, which was longer than the rest of them, I was like, what about that one? She's like, yeah. I was like, oh, yeah, 100%.

I want the most candy for my money. So was Craigans, and I know we've had this conversation before, but I'm looking at the corner again. Was Craigans where the new church is there, or was it where the Aikido place is?

No. The Aikido place was Jack Roberts Linwood Home Appliance. I won't be undersold. And across was where the mega church is now, or I don't know if it's mega or not, but just the church.

Mosaic Community Church.

That church, that was Cregan's Pharmacy. That's Cregan's.

I've got to remember that. Yeah. Okay. And that's, again, not to extend this too long, but that's like where you worked for a little bit. That's where the ill-gotten NES came from, but then was returned, right?

Then was returned. That's all right there. All of that took place in whatever that is. Is that church Mosaic? Is that what they call it?

Yeah, it's called Mosaic. I'm looking at the sign now. I think that's a chain. Maps. Or like a denomination now,

No, seriously, I saw a mosaic somewhere else in America.

I'm pretty sure that the E line, you know, the E line goes up and down Aurora, but it veers away for a little bit kind of by Green Lake, and it kind of goes around this corner, exits Aurora, and then comes back and meets Aurora again for some reason. And I think it might be right on this corner, because I can't tell you how many times at night I have been, like, looking up from my phone on the E line, where am I again? And then I see the giant sign for Mosaic Community Church.

When you see that, think of Verl and Wally Those were the names of the pharmacists that I worked for And I'm pretty sure Molly was making sweet time With a single mom named Sandy Who lived across the street from us She once hired me to babysit her kids And I did, and when the kids went down for a nap Or were otherwise occupied I did watch the movie Roadhouse Because I heard that there might be boobs in it I think there are And I feel like she got mad. I feel like I got in trouble. She told my parents that I watched Roadhouse or something. I feel like that was a one-and-done situation. I was only allowed to babysit one time for her.

I believe there is some lovemaking that takes place on a roof, I believe, in that movie. But I don't remember to what degree a young Luke Burbank would be able to see what he's looking for there. Anyway, all right. Speaking of sweet, back to David.

Apparently number one goes back to childhood, let's be honest. I hope number one is the same number one for everyone.

Do you think that number one – I'm going to make a prediction here. Do you think his number one is you realize the actor-comedian Martin Starr has his own line of gummy candies and you order it online?

Well, why do we even have to listen to the message now? I was just guessing.

I just wanted to – is that what your guess is too? Well, obviously. Yeah, right. Okay.

Okay, but seriously, let's try it. Let's think. Okay. Because I haven't previewed this. I'm guessing you haven't gotten this far either. Nope, I haven't listened. What do we, he seems to think that this is the common, maybe it's going to be Halloween, maybe?

He says it goes back to childhood. I'm going to say, well, I'm leaning more towards a type, and it's got to be an experience. I was wondering if dum-dum suckers come into play here. Like, where do you get free dum-dums and don't say TBTL?

When you're a kid, you might get, well, that would be, I do feel like that would be the doctor's office. That's a good point. Like, are we giving candy to children now? maybe not anymore

Yeah. But I wonder if he's going to say Halloween because that's also a kid thing.

That makes sense. Yeah, it's got to be Halloween related. You're probably right. Let's find out. Let's find out.

That's trick-or-treating candy as a kid, specifically night one candy. This is the candy that is the first candy. And maybe some people, maybe this is final night candy. Maybe some people save their best candy for last. They eat sort of their candy. They have it in a different order than me. For me, I'm at least going to eat some of my best candy on the first night after trick-or-treating as a kid. And so that candy is going to be Kit Kats and Reese's and all the good stuff. That's what I want that first night. And there's nothing better as a kid than when you've just gone through all of the trick-or-treating. It's Washington State. Maybe it's raining while you're trick-or-treating. You come back. You have your pillowcase full of candy. And you start taking out some of the candy. You start sorting it, and you give yourself a few of the best ones. All right. Those are my top five candies.

Thanks, David. Well, it must have been nice, David, because, of course, I grew up in a version of our family where we didn't go trick-or-treating. So I can't even relate to this. I've only been trick-or-treating, and trick-or-treating is the worst for my interior rash. I've only been trick-or-treating one block from my house as a child one time. I've told the story a billion times on many different TBTL episodes, but just to say my trick-or-treating career was very short-lived. And so I can't relate to that, but it sounds pretty fun. Now, I never went trick-or-treating.

Wait, you didn't trick-or-treat as a kid either because you lived in the country? Because we lived in the country. I mean, I think that my parents could have maybe driven us down. Like church? Didn't do a church thing or something? I'm sure there were some sort of organizations that would maybe organize group trick-or-treating activities or something. Maybe if my parents had driven me to downtown Valley City. But all that was in downtown was like a doctor's office, a tack shop, and a barber shop. So I don't even know. But anyway, maybe that's one of the reasons I'm not that into Halloween. But we did have Halloween parties at school, and we would get candy for that. And I will say, and this may be – I think this is somehow on brand for me, but I don't know exactly how. I think my favorite – my memory of, like, my favorite candies were actually non-chocolate candies on Halloween, but the sweet tarts. Is that what they were called, the small? Because it seemed like you were getting, kind of like your Charleston shoe, it seemed like you were getting, instead of one piece of candy, like about 20 pieces of candy, the tiny little discs that come in a little tube, and then you kind of, you unspin it. Chew on them, and sometimes they're kind of tart, though, in the middle. They were tart, but they were small, right? They were like the size of a pill or something like that. But very satisfying. And then when you would bite into them, finally, they would be like almost a cold feeling, sort of a refreshing cold feeling. I love those things.

What were the ones... I feel like there was two versions... Was there two versions of Sweet Tarts, the kind that you were describing? I guess in order for them to be Sweet Tart, they'd have to be that way. I feel like maybe I'm confusing them with Smarties. I feel like there was a version of Sweet Tarts that were like a giant Smarties.

Wait, I think this whole time I was talking about Smarties. Sorry, does that mess up? Smarties versus Sweet Tarts. Yeah, Smarties were the really tiny ones, right? They were just a tiny little tube. That's what I was talking about the whole time. Oh, okay.

Because I remember, I think it was with sweet tarts, I learned how to play poker when I was a kid. Although, I don't know if we were playing by the right rules, but we used sweet tarts as our poker chips. So that's, you'd win sweet tarts. So a sweet tart is like the size of a quarter or something like that? No, it's also pretty small. It's like the size. It's the size of, let's say, a nickel. Okay. A sweet tart. But yeah, no, it's as I remembered it. So they're almost like, imagine a Smartie, but just a lot bigger. Scale it up to the size of, let's say, a quarter and make it thicker, and that's a sweet tart.

Okay, yeah. I was talking about Smarties, not sweet tarts. My apologies. My apologies. That must have been very confusing for you and everybody involved. It was, but we got through it together, thankfully.

Yes, we did. But how will the donors respond is the real question. Let's find out. All right, let's thank some donors. These folks are paying us not with Sweet Tarts, not with Smarties, but with actual money, which we then use to buy Sweet Tarts and Smarties, but that's our business.

Do you remember there was a time there when some people, they didn't like us calling ourselves dummies instead of starting their emails with, hey, dummies. Didn't some people call us, hey, Smarties, or am I misremembering that?

Yeah, let's go back to that. I think that was helping my self-esteem. Yeah, I've really been dragging since then. You know what, actually, I'm feeling less shame today thanks to folks like Christine Hoff of Moorhead, Minnesota.

Hey, thank you, Christine. Appreciate it. Hope it's... Yeah, what do you think the weather in Moorhead, Minnesota is right now? Yeah, rough stuff. Balmy?

Probably not.

Thanks, Christine. Thanks to Julia Morse of Bozarts Village, Washington. Nice. Good old Bozarts Village. We love it over there.

Yes, love that you get to say that because I can never remember which letters are pronounced. Boz.

It is a little bit tricky. Yes. The Bozarts movement. Darren Malihi is in Oakland, California. Hey, I've only been to Oakland once, but I loved it. Oakland is a really cool town. I really, really like it. I have been there a few times over the last few years, once to interview Alanis Morissette, who lives in Oakland, California.

Interesting. I was wearing my San Jose Giants hat yesterday, and somebody asked me about it. That was on the same trip that I visited Oakland.

What do you say about when someone says, oh, I like your hat? Because I know the thing with you and the hats is You have a concern around seeming like you don't know enough about the team. You're being a poseur. What do you say about the San Francisco or the San Jose Giants, rather?

I don't say anything. I punch them in the throat, and I say, don't you ever ask me that again? No. I mean, that one is easy for me because I bought that hat at a game. So at least I have a little, you know what I mean? I can just say, you know, it's a minor league team. It's not even AAA, right? It's like I think AA or possibly lower is a very small stadium. So nobody's going to be quizzing me on who's in the San Francisco Giants farm system, I don't think. So I just said, you know, somebody was kind of looking at me funny. And I was like, what's going on? He said, I'm trying to read your hat. I'm like, oh, it's an S and a J. It's for the San Jose Giants. And he looked at me quizzically, and I said, they're a minor league team in San Jose. And I went to a game once, and it was so much fun.

Nice. That's a solid answer. I think Darren Malihi would accept that answer if that's who you were talking. And what about Charlie Trillis of Charleston, South Carolina? We call that the Nicholas Sparks Zone. Oh, that's what we most certainly do from yesterday's episode. Down there in South Carolina. Thanks, Charlie. Thanks to Jenny Dahl, who's in Burien, Washington. Hey, thank you, Jenny. And then Patrick Reddington, rounding things out today, coming to us from Citrus Heights, California.

Oh, love the sound of that.

Sounds perfect this time of year.

I was watching what? But I was watching The Postman Only Rings twice the other day. Becca and I saw that in the theater. Did you? At the Hollywood Theater a year or two ago. Oh, that's funny because I don't think I've ever seen it before. And I didn't really know much about it. It made me want to read the book. I hear the book is really good, and I enjoyed it. But what I loved was just like, you know, it takes place in, I think, the outskirts of Los Angeles. And so it's like just the casual fruit tree in the background. This is a black and white movie, too. But just the casual orange tree that is in, remember he's like, he's working at some like kind of gas station slash diner or whatever.

I jogged past that gas station randomly in Santa Barbara and flipped out. So did they kind of keep it looking like it did in the movie? No. I mean, yes, it looks like it. I think it was actually like under construction. It wasn't operating. But like, now I'm going to, golly. Now I'm sure that someone's going to look this up and I'm going to be wrong We were staying, Beck and I were staying in Santa Barbara It was a couple of years ago And we went out on a little jog And we went by a service station I said, doesn't that look just like the one from The Postman Always Rings Twice Which we had, you know, seen in the theater And she goes, it totally does And then we looked it up and I think it was actually the place Which was just a wild coincidence Because yeah, it's

The film was shot in Santa Barbara

I'm looking at Wikipedia

Oh wait, wait, wait, wait That says the 1981 film We've got to find the 1964 film. And that I don't know. The one in 19— Wait, you saw the old one, right? Yeah, the old one. Or I'm sorry, the 1946. Did I say 64? Yeah. 1946, Lana Turner. Yeah, that was the one that we saw. Yep. And let me see here. I'm trying to figure out where that one was shot.

Thank you for trying to back me up on this. Yeah, yeah.

So anyway, I know that it was shot in Santa Monica, the— or Santa Barbara, rather. Sorry. I spoke there as I'm trying to read. Let's see. Santa Barbara is definitely in the plot.

I'm looking at the plot, too. The next day, the three of them are to drive to Santa Barbara to finalize the sale of Twin Oaks. So yeah, I do think that in the really old version, the 1946 version, I think that it's in Santa Barbara, too. It's right there, kind of along the... I don't even know. I don't know Santa Barbara well enough, but I know that we jogged by it, and my mind was blown because we had seen the movie like two months previous. That would freak me out. It was like, what are the chances that we are, Without any planning Going past this service station That was in this movie That we randomly saw That movie itself being From almost 100 years ago Or 80 years ago

Yeah Yeah I enjoyed it I liked it And then I was reading About it later So I was like Why is it called that There's a quick line At the Literally the last moments of the movie they drop the name of the movie in there but it was not in the book do you remember the name of the uh author of the book by the way because i was just reading about this it's kind of an interesting story uh of postman rings twice um i didn't realize that he was a pretty heavyweight uh james kane was his name and he ended up being a pretty big heavyweight in like uh you you know kind of west coast noir like your your dashells hammets and your raymond chandlers or whatever i've never read any types oh yeah oh i'm about to reread um ask the dust by the way that's on my bookshelf or on my nightstand but um james came here when i moved to la as one does i think yes that was the first book i read when i moved to la too no joke oh my god that's so funny um but anyway i uh uh i was reading i was like why is it called that i watched the movie the other day and then i found myself on the library of congress website luke i just like to

you know we've got a listener who works there remember oh no i didn't remember but that's Awesome. I think it's Nigel, and I think he was going to – wait, no, no, not Nigel. Sorry. It's Listener. I'm going to get there. We've got a Listener, Harrison, I think. Okay. Nigel and Harrison seem like they could be brothers. These are my children, Nigel and Harrison. And I think he might work there and was going to – he was, I think, going to let us look at some golden tablets or something that got there.

Or was he going to try to get TBTL into it? Something like that. Anyway. Yeah, yeah. I do remember that. I'm saying we've got to hook up with the Library of Congress. Anyway, the Library of Congress was going through a bunch of letters between James Cain and I think the original Knopf. I can't think of his name, but Knopf Publishing, right?

Alfred Knopf. Alfred, yes. And they were going back and forth.

And James Cain had not broken through yet. And he was broke as a joke, I think. He was writing little pieces here and there. But this was, I think, his breakout novel that wasn't published yet. And the original name was something they didn't like, like spaghetti and meatballs or something. It wasn't that, but it was just like, Knopf didn't like it, and so the publisher was pushing pretty hard on a different name, and he's like, no, I don't like that, I don't like that, and they were going back and forth, and he agreed to change the name, but he didn't like what the publisher was offering, and you can see the actual letters that they were writing back and forth. like we would fire off an email or a text today these were very short letters but they were sent through the post and apparently Cain was talking to a friend of his during this process and a friend of his was talking about the writing process and said like oh yeah you know one thing I noticed when I was like kind of secluded and writing my novel or my play was the postman always rings twice in other words if you don't ring if you don't answer on the first ring then the postman will will come and ring twice before leaving and he said i love that as a name of a book and then they were like what is the how does that tie in it doesn't tie in at all and he just basically liked the sound of it wrote it into the book but wrote it in and then years it sounds like kind of years later or sometime afterwards when people would ask him about it it sounds like he's sort of reversed engineered the meaning into the justice justice stands in for the postman in this case so in other words i don't know how well you remember the story and i don't want to spoil it for those who haven't seen it yet if it's on your list you know it just did come out about a hundred years ago um but the idea is he and his partner kind of get away with murder literally and don't serve justice for it but then he accidentally kills his partner and it truly is an accident but he is found guilty of that because they think he did it on purpose and so he's like the postman always rings twice like justice will eventually get you gotcha if they don't because he gets away with the first crime but he he and the woman get away with it the first time but then he accidentally kills her and it looks like they're gonna end up living i don't know maybe happily ever after but then there's a real accident and uh and she dies and and so i I think that's when he barks out to the name of the—he's on death row. The priest has just given him last rites, Luke. Good movie.

It's a good movie, by the way. I did really enjoy it. It held my attention, too. I was wondering, because, I mean, it's very old.

Yeah. A lot of twists and turns, too. You think it's over, and then it goes on for another 45 minutes, because the postman at that point had only rung once, if you will.

And we were promised two rings for the postman. And some movie candy. Thank you, David, for that, by the way. Hey, thanks, bro. Yeah. I don't think you've heard the David Burbank always rings five times.

That's right. We still have. I don't think you've heard the last of the lists from my bro.

We'll hear more. We'll kind of hear some different lists over the next few days and have all kinds of different stuff going on. So, please, maybe tomorrow, Andrew, well, I don't know. I don't know how much of my, I got a situation going on that I might, it will torpedo our entire show tomorrow, so maybe I'll hold off on it.

Well, maybe people want to hear it. Okay.

All right. The Burbank always promotes twice is the takeaway from this. Hey, thanks for listening. Everybody, we'll be back here tomorrow with more Imaginary Radio. So please do join us for that in the meantime. Have a great Tuesday. Take care of yourselves. And please remember, no mountain too tall. And good luck to all.

You know, there's something about this that's like, well, it's like you're expecting a letter that you're just crazy to get. And you hang around the front door for fear you might not hear him ring. You never realize that he always rings twice. What's that? He rang twice for Cora, and now he's ringing twice for me, isn't he? That's about it. Power out.