Muse

You know you rock when you roll with the Seahawks Marshawn Lynch, Beast Moe with his dreadlocks Rolls and passes the ball to the endzone touchdown you know we're gonna get the crown in super bowl 24 team we get the ring the bling listen to the crowd sing seahawks seahawks seahawks we block that offense to say we'll lose to such an offense and nonsense we got the best defense being the other quarterback comes with the expense of the act of being sacked to hope the broncos have enough time to react to the level of game the hawks are bringing that evening a super bowl sunny because they're gonna go all the way for the win starting when the game begins all the way to the end of the game And to go down in fame as the Super Bowl champions of this year, this team should be feared.

You better saddle up when you roll with Seattle. Broncos seem like some old cattle left in the field.

Well, what a difference a week makes. Well, at least for one of these football teams. Hey everybody, welcome to the No Point. I'm Luke Burbank right over there, my friend, Andrew Walsh. Should we start with the Seahawks or the Joel Batonio Browns? Let's start with the Seahawks.

Okay.

You're not ready to talk about the Browns yet?

I'm in a pretty sour mood. I'm sorry, man. It hasn't worn off. It hasn't worn off. I'm in a pretty sour mood. Yesterday was probably, listen, I'm not going to lie here, I probably alcohol didn't help in this situation. Usually I watch a game. Really?

It usually does in my experience.

Well, you know, I'm not saying that I don't often have a few pops while watching a football game, but this time we went to the Westie, which is the local Browns bar in our neighborhood, and to watch the Browns game, which starts at 10. No, no, or if so, she was sitting in a different place, the older lady who had a lot of opinions and had once applied to be the Browns coach, according to her. I like her. She's a spitfire. My kind of lady. It actually is kind of a cool community thing. Somebody made special pumpkin cookies that they brought in. I do like the community aspect of it, which is why I thought, hey, we should try to go to the Browns bar for at least one game instead of just watching them at home, which was great, But, you know, it begins with a Bloody Mary at 10, which switches to mimosas, which switches to beers, which then, you know, by the time by the time the game was over, I had a few of those and then James B making an appearance later on. Then I went to then I'm like, well, I'm out. I might as well go to Teddy's to watch the Seahawks game. And so and then something bad happened to me in my fantasy football realm, which just seems like a stupid thing to talk about on the radio when real games are happening. But like I'll talk about that at the end of the I'll talk about that at the end of the show, if you don't mind. But I just like you use the term bad beat. I think I understand what a bad beat is. I'm going to describe it to you later. So I got to say I went to bed at 830 yesterday feeling drunk and more sour than I felt in a very, very long time regarding sports. I was and it lasted. I thought, well, I'll wake up in the morning and the poison will have passed. But the poison hasn't fully passed. I'll be honest with you. I'm pretty upset about where the Browns are right now.

I was like, I needed to text you about some work stuff yesterday, but I really tried to, like, give it some breathing room.

I mean, you can text me about work stuff. I mean, I don't want people, like, jumping in my—I don't like getting razzed after something like that.

You're actually lucky Ramon doesn't hear deets because he is a Steelers guy.

Oh, that's right. Well, see, we're getting ahead of ourselves. When I went over to—I was feeling really bummed when I left the Browns bar. Then Genevieve had some errands to run So I, like any good partner Said, well I will be at Teddy's watching The Seahawks game And then I go in there, and who's there But like a drunk, annoying Steelers fan Now I will say this though, he was not a Razzer, he was trying to be Polite, he was like, hey, you know, good game Real defensive game On both sides of the ball I'm sorry, by both teams Defensive game on both sides of the ball In a certain way, I think the Browns did do that, which was the problem. But anyway, we don't have to talk about that now. But I was like, oh, he was nice enough, but he was just like – he's kind of an – he's just an older guy, kind of annoying. I could tell he was already annoying the bartenders there, and they'd only been open for about a half hour. Was he in Steelers' regalia? He had a hat on, and I had like a Browns hoodie on, and there was a regular – I think you had a Bannon of Browns gear, if I remember from the text. Oh, that's right. Yeah, I was wearing a couple of different collars. But anyway, so it was friendly enough But it was like, I just don't have the I don't have the emotional fortitude right now To talk to an annoying Steelers fan As nice as he was being And he was being nice I was just like, I don't want to talk about the game I'm here to

to meet up with my friend Jim Meme and uh watch and I what I wanted to see was six or seven Jags

fans here in Portland and it was like enough already yeah are you being sick like Bortles was here yeah right are there any I mean peace and love to our listeners in Jacksonville I think listener uh Lauren is down there but like are there any Jaguars fans is that a thing

I've asked that question myself many times but I I will say this as a as a transition I sat down at the bar at Teddy's in front of the TV and I said all I want I said this to my buddy John who's bartending I said all I need is for the Seahawks just to roll like just put up a bunch of points just have a good clean no stress just no stress just put up a lot of points with our backup quarterback Geno Smith and that's exactly what I got I got that nice balm that I used to get in prior seasons after a painful Browns loss just put up a bunch of points and give me a give me a non close good seahawks dominant win over the one in at that point six jags and that's

exactly what we got five one and five at that point uh i believe lydia cruz had it right on twitter when she said i believe geno smith went as russell wilson for halloween she's great man she really is a good follow on twitter would recommend yeah um because that was yeah boy oh boy so i uh i mentioned this i think on the real show today but i found myself in a because of moving and everything and kind of like a weird time thing where i was trying to get my jog in and so i was like the game started at 120 the seahawks game started at 120 and i think i got back from my jog at like two so i had a lot of first half to fast forward through and i was watching it on like two arrows so i was it was a kind of maybe the wrong way to watch the game because i knew pretty quickly that we were just going to completely dominate them like i watched like two touchdowns occur kind of in semi-fast speed um so it was like there was no there was no um you know intrigue to the game it was like okay the jaguars are not good and the seahawks are also not good but they are better than the especially not good jaguars and geno smith looks amazing and mostly i was mad because i forgot to bet my stupid crazy bets and had there been one that was like tyler lockett catches two touchdowns and dk metcalf catches two touchdowns how about this one i don't think this was a prop bet but i would have loved it geno smith sets the record for most completions to start a game takes it away from aaron rogers like that would have been a thing because i think he had 14 completions in a row to start the game which which was one more

than aaron rogers had wow i knew that i knew that he was rolling and i think i even knew that 14 of 14 stat but i don't think i realized it was a record breaker because i couldn't really hear

the sound where i was um but anyway yeah it was a uh it was a very it was an amazingly good game for the seahawks which you have to take with a blake bortles size grain of salt in that it was the jacksonville jaguars so i don't really think it proved anything other than we are better than the worst team in football a team that had lost 20 games before they won uh two weeks ago in london so again none of this is to be mean to our friends in jacksonville it's just it's just kind of like how it is and it was very fun to see them win but i don't think it really says anything about this team other than geno smith you know is a competent quarterback which i didn't think he was recently but again he has looked incompetent against teams that are better than the jacksonville

jaguars that's kind of the problem yes but i will say this um first of all we're also down a running back you know we got second and third string running backs there oh unbreakable what they call a mr glass we're missing um you know we're missing uh our starting quarterback and and like alex collings looks looks good though right yeah he looked he looked all right although um And did they get much of a running game going? What were the running numbers?

Well, again, I was fast-forwarding it, but I felt like in the first half, Alex Collins had some decent-looking runs where he was getting five, six yards a pop. But definitely it was a passing game for us.

I'm now several tangents away from what I was starting to say. Let's come back around to this later. I'd like to see more Homer. I think Homer has a different running style. I don't understand why we're not seeing him more, But maybe it's because the coaches see things we don't. But hold on. I want to finish my thought and just say that, like, you needed – like, last week I asked you, did Geno have a bad game last week or is he, as you will often say, like kind of reverting to the mean? I think you say that. Is it reverting? Whatever. Point is – Regressing. Regressing. Did we see him as he is last week? Because I thought that he's a little bit better than what we saw last week. And again, I know that we were playing, again, no offense, but some old cattle. But it still. needed to be an easy victory and it was an easy victory you could still see a situation where it's a victory but it's like uh you know you're on the edge of your seat which it wasn't it was exactly what we needed to do i feel i feel better and we're going into a bye yes it is hard to not be

happy when you just absolutely pwn a team going into the bye when you're fast healing generational quarterback is probably coming back although i say that without having read any indication of that But I just know that the hope was that Russell could come back after the bye. And, again, all the feedback is he's getting things taken out of his body sooner than was expected. So it makes me think he'll be back after the bye.

I think a lot of people are kind of, if not assuming that, kind of hoping that. Right.

I mean, so we now sit at 3 and 5. Is that the record? Yeah. And we're going to go on a bye, and then we're going to play Green Bay. Yeah. That's scary. That's going to be a tough one. I mean, in the Russell Wilson hero narrative, I can see a world in which he comes back and he channels the power of Mr. Unlimited and just goes off. Or he re-injures his finger and he never plays another down for a Seahawks.

Or, yeah, or he just doesn't have the grip on the ball. You know what I mean? He does, as we've been seeing, he has a finesse with that ball. Sure does. That has to do with the finger placement. So you'll see. I mean, no joke. I mean, they call me kind of, they often refer to me as the white Russell Wilson. But the fingers that I broke on my left hand, like, you know that I still can't make a fist, right? Like, that's why I'm going to physical therapy, which I think I'm just going to quit at this point.

I actually didn't know that.

Yeah, like, they will not bend. And it's very similar stuff. It was your moon ball to Tyler Lockett. Right. Now, luckily, this is my left hand. And what made me such a great quarterback was my right hand. But like, you know, what he's trying to do is he's trying to get his soft tissue aside from because I think they did say some bone pulled away there. But I'm sure that heals easier than what you got to do.

I guess he also had a fracture. Yeah, I think it was. I didn't know until yesterday on the broadcast. They described it as a fracture and then also whatever that, you know, sort of ligament tear or whatever that thing is.

I think that kind of fracture, because I was talking to my doctor about it, about my own thing, and then I heard some other people talk about it with Russell Wilson, and it's a similar thing. That kind of fracture is when the soft tissue, you have a soft tissue injury that the soft tissue pulls the bone away, sort of, and that's what sort of happened in my pinky. So my doctor said technically it's a fracture, and I think that was kind of a similar thing. It was still mostly a soft tissue thing, but because of the way it bends and pulls, it kind of pulls the bone away from the rest of the bone. So it's a fracture in that way. But you've got to hope that he has that flexibility in that finger again. Can he bend it all the way? Can he grip the ball the way he used to is the whole thing here.

Yeah. Oh, gosh. What happened? Sorry. This standing desk I'm at has just got a mind of its own. I'm still at Becca's place because I'm sans internet in my new apartment. Is it an electric standing desk or is that a printer right here? It is. No, you hear an electric standing desk that just occasionally will decide to descend to a very, very short height and just did that. Sorry about that. Yeah. I mean, Russell Wilson has never been through this. So it is all kind of question marks around will everything work the same when he comes back? which is, you know, stressful. But again, I feel like I've kind of released Desire. You know what? I had released Desire on this season, and then DFTB and I were moving my stuff. And I said, how do you feel about the Seahawks? I mean, are we just totally screwed? And he went, I don't think we're as screwed as people are saying. And then that injected a little hope into my brain. And then we went out and steamrolled the Jags. So now I'm like, by the way, that is definitely a band that played a bar in Cleveland in the 80s. steamroll the Jags yeah I remember them they were Michael Stanley did Michael Stanley front that

band I think it was a little bit more avant-garde than Michael Stanley oh but uh like it that

injected a little hope into my brain um and then we went out and won and so it's kind of like now I'm I don't know I mean they should they flashed a graphic during the game that was like the wild card standings and the Seahawks were extremely at the bottom of that and we haven't even really play the teeth of our schedule yet i mean everything in the nfc west will be the aforementioned teeth um so i don't know i i i feel good that we won but this if the seahawks if russell comes back and he's 100 and the seahawks sort of mount some late season charge i will be as shocked as anyone it will be a pleasant surprise but i don't think it's likely

Yeah, the defense looked good, again, playing against Trevor Lawrence and not so great offense. And Trevor's still a rookie. Yeah, yeah, he was a rookie this year, right? He's playing his rookie year? I think he's in his second season. Okay, gotcha. Did he play in his second season? Well, we don't know. His first season? Sorry. Yeah, he did.

He had flashes. He had some flashes. Man, I'll tell you what. Quarterbacks Highly sort of Drafted quarterbacks Are so It's such a weird Phenomenon in the NFL Which is like They come in Some They have flashes And then some of them End up being good And some of them End up being Carson Wentz Like Lawrence had I think he had some flashes His first season Sort of like Joe Burrow At Cincy Like

He got injured Well Burrow got injured Yeah that I think But he was pretty hot Before he got injured Didn't he?

He was But now it's like I don't know what he's doing this season but it doesn't seem like he's crushing it i'm not hearing a lot about cincinnati oh he's

they're leading the division oh really they just they finally just lost their second game i think

they're killing it oh wow okay see this is what i get for not monitoring joe burrow so maybe burrow

is one of those ones who my apologies they actually they just lost their third so they're five and three now but they were until until they had a loss this weekend to the jets they were five

and two and you know solidly the sam darnold helmed yeah that's one of those just like darnold is another example of it it's like just i mean the list is long of these quarterbacks that come in in the top five draft positions and then just kind of i don't know they just they all sort of basically i think here's what it is if you're the gm who drafted like a quarterback high in the draft you're very invested in the narrative around them being positive whether it's mits Trubitsky and Chicago who is no longer there like what happens is you draft someone you you hype them up they have like a good game everyone says they're the next you know Russell Wilson and then they just quietly erode and then you never hear from him again and then Case Keenum is your quarterback yeah like or a some some kind of a um uh who are those uh those those brothers it's Like, not the Hewards, but who are the other brother quarterbacks who are always – there's always one of them on some team?

Yeah, I always say McCown here. I don't – it's not McCown, though. It's the other one there. One of them was at Cleveland Brown for a while.

Yeah, I think it's McCown, is it?

There's McCown, yeah.

Anyway, there's – like, what ends up happening is these quarterbacks come in, and then eventually they flame out, and then you end up with a McCown. Right. Like, you know what I mean? It's such a weird thing, which is, let's just transition us to Baker. Baker, I think, defied that, you know, in that he had a pretty good rookie season. Like, I think there was some question about him, as I like to say, regressing to the mean in his sophomore year. And then his junior year, if we're going to go with high school terminology, wasn't his third season when he really kind of, like, started to put it together?

Yeah, I think so, yeah. So did he play in this game? by the way mccown i was thinking mccown i often say mccoy when i mean oh because there are mccoys too there are mccoys as well but it is the mccowns who you and i were both thinking of but i didn't have any confidence in myself and that's the problem there i should have just said you're talking about the mccown brothers luke and i should have said in that voice you know what have an opinion jerk have an opinion jerk what was your question on the table my apologies

my question was did um baker actually play for the browns i felt like i saw his name flashing

across yes and this is where i'm an idiot apparently everybody knew this on thursday and i was not paying attention i thought i just thought we're not listening to your tony reality tony rizzo uh when i uh yeah i actually haven't listened to rizzo in a long time i can't i can't take that shit anymore plus i think a lot of it's behind a paywall now it's like really dude really anyway um yes so i sat down at the browns bar yesterday and i see baker mayfield and i turn to the woman next to me i'm like baker's playing she's like yeah it's announced on thursday i'm like oh my god i had no idea and i i thought it was kind of a bad idea because he's dealing with an injury in his non-throwing shoulder um but he i think he's a little russell wilson-esque in that he really fights to be out there and so which is good you want that from exactly yeah yeah so i think that's that thing that's generally a positive and he did not re-injure himself yesterday either so we can talk about that more later but i was surprised to see our boy out there

for sure so uh i ended up watching the browns game on the app just sort of towards the end i got in for the good part which was the last five minutes of the fourth quarter um and i don't want to ask you to go to a dark place but like how are you feeling what do you think happened etc

i i don't know exactly what happened and that's why we can keep this quick and just move on to the really interesting thing which is my fantasy

football bad beat but um i uh i just am i'm really frustrated by this offense here like i don't understand it i mean the defense while not perfect held the steelers to 15 points and we couldn't we couldn't win with that and we had you know we had been struggling majorly with injuries the past several games last week kind of being the peak of the injury like we were missing a lot of uh offensive you have any part of chunt back this week we did um so chubb was back at one point during the game i yelled chunt and i realize i'm around a bunch of people who don't know what that is and they all think that i think uh nick chubb is kareem hunt i bet you a million bucks there's somebody in that uh in that bar who's like this guy doesn't even know anything about the browns um but anyway but we are our o-line until um actually wait do we have the sounder here sorry Was anybody protecting the city of rock and roll? A certain Jack Conklin did leave the game with another issue. My name is Jack, and I protect your city's favorite quarterback. That's the right tackle there. But anyway, but we got Jarvis Landry back out there. We got our starting running back back out there. We have our starting quarterback back out there. Now, a lot of these people are kind of coming off of injuries, as is OBJ still kind of nursing some stuff. So nobody is maybe at their peak performance, but like the Steelers are not good this year. And we have we have a very talented team and we are not playing to those talent levels. And I don't know what's up with OBJ. I think he's targeted twice, comes up with nothing. I think one of those targets maybe gets called back because of an injury. So maybe it doesn't show up on the stat sheet that way. I don't understand why we have him on a team. I mean, maybe you're just still using him as as a way to throw off the defense. so they'll keep covering him but like there was one pass like baker was off he's letting him sail too much he's also like going you can tell when he's off because he loses finesse and he either lets him fly high or he shoots him like a bullet and and you know sometimes that's great but you can tell when he's just doing it constantly it's because he's a bit rattled um i don't know what is going on we could not get the run game going at all um and you know so chubb is coming off i believe in a calf injury i think calf or ankle so either way that's understandable but i don't know why we didn't see more of um uh johnson uh dearness johnson yeah and who got our lone our lone touchdown yesterday but we don't see him and i know that he's a third stringer and you have your first stringer back and the coaches must see stuff that we don't see but i don't understand why he doesn't get more touches he seemed to be he seems to have a slightly different running style why not try that we basically got nowhere with our running game and you have Jarvis Landry just dropping dropping passes all over the place including a fumble a game-changing fumble I feel like Jarvis lost that game for us at least two times over like I'm frustrated and like this is not good we're going to play the bang or let's see are the Bengals coming to Cleveland I assume

we're going to Cincy we're now just starting as you kind of said about the Seahawks we're just now starting to play our divisional rivals starting with this and if we couldn't beat the lowest the the lowest common denominator which are the Steelers who were in last place at home I don't know how we're going to beat the Bengals of all the game was in Cleveland yeah and certainly we still have two more rate we have two Bengals games and two Ravens games coming up like I just I'm I'm I'm really mad and like I don't even know what to say I don't have analysis because I don't know what – I don't know if they have the book on Stefanski. I don't know what it is, but we could not get the run game going, and our quarterback is not completing passes. His numbers are not as bad as it – I heard the numbers today. They're not as bad as it looked, but, like, I don't know, man. I literally – I don't know. I don't know. I'm out. I'm not out. Football won't be out. I was thinking about being out. I was thinking – honestly, I was so upset yesterday. Okay. Well, when I said it here a second ago, I really was like, maybe I just, like, maybe no more. but that never holds up like um but i i was just like if we can't win with this team the browns are so stacked with talent what is going wrong but the good news is you're so stacked with talent

meaning football is weird the arc of football is long but it bends towards the browns i believe mlk said that like the okay historically has not bent towards the browns but my i guess my point is you guys are stacked like you're in actually I think you're an okay position in that your division is not as stacked as like the NFC West and you have good players and football is weird in that you guys could start rolling like you could you know you very much can beat Cincy and like you win that game you win the next one like in four weeks can I just say I think you got the AFC North

wrong buddy the Ravens are five and two and the Bengals are five and three and I think it was a fluke that they lost like those are those are good teams but I still think you guys can beat the Bengals I just—I will—listen, I've made a lot of money assuming people can beat the Bengals.

Right, but yeah, but you just mentioned at the beginning that you haven't really been playing the Bengals. The Bengals were rolling. I mean, the Bengals were—

But five and three in that division, I mean, like, no offense, that's not the toughest division in the NFL.

I see. This is where I think that you're basing this on what the AFC North used to be and not what the AFC North is right now.

Okay, who have they lost to? Let me ask you this. Who have the Bengals lost to?

Well, the Bengals did have that fluke to the Jets yesterday.

which was good, but, um, good. That's not a good team. They lost to like the jets challenge Jacksonville for, but who else have they lost to? And again, I don't, I don't know the answer to this. I'm not trying to like prove some point. I'm, I'm genuinely curious. Like who have the

bangles beat the Vikings, the bangles, uh, beat the Steelers, uh, the bangles beat the Jags. Okay. Um, they did get beat by the Packers, uh, which is a good team. They did get beat by the

bears which is not a very good team not a great team peace and love as you bike into your tv show

today right so the so that's it the the jets and the bears and the green bay is who they lost you so you're right two of those teams are bad teams but they also beat some good teams i i guess

here's what i'm trying to say putting aside and i'm totally with you i don't have a good knowledge of that division i just think it's a good thing when you have here are the kind of categories of NFL frustration one of the categories is we're just a bad team we just can't compete that's like being a Jacksonville fan right now another category is we have a lot of talent but we can't put it together which is I think kind of where you're living right now and that's frustrating but the having of the talent is a big deal to me in that you guys could rip off five games in a row and Chris you know Mortensen could be showing up on ESPN talking about how the Browns are the hottest team in football in five weeks like it's that doesn't seem like a non-possibility to me if that means like whereas i think the seahawks are in much worse i mean not just from a record standpoint what is the bears uh excuse me what is the browns record right now now they're four and four okay the seahawks i think are in a much more precarious position because i think we literally don't have the talent to compete in the nfc west i just think i think that you things might feel really different in five weeks if it comes together it also could not come together for the Browns but at least you have the building blocks which is something yeah I mean we'll see

I mean you could be right there is a difference between a five and two and five and three division leaders and a seven two seven and one division leaders certainly so you know obviously I hope you're right but what I saw yesterday was just and again maybe maybe it's maybe they can coach around it but it just seems so it and I don't think I'm alone here like I think what we just saw yesterday was a team and it wasn't like they didn't have get up and go it wasn't like baker doesn't care like baker had i don't know you probably i don't know if you would have seen this

or not but there was sort of a dramatic dude's having a yard sale in front of the stadium yeah

like he's got the fire he wants it bad and he wants to be out there and he's got fire in his belly like i don't think it's like a i don't know i'm not i'm not concerned about the wanting it but that's maybe what's so frustrating is it's just unclear why we couldn't beat the steelers yesterday like it's just right we needed to beat the Steelers yesterday that was the first of what I think is going to be a challenging kind of a challenging part of the scale well what's going on with the Patriots we're playing the Bengals next week but then are the Patriots are they kind of Patriots are not good this year yeah I knew that they worked they got off to a bad start are

they getting off to a bad middle too they followed up their bad start with a not great middle I mean it turns out when you when you lose Tom Brady like the tide goes out and you start to see the barnacles on the Bill Belichick model like I definitely think they're under 500 but again I don't want to internet right now because it might cut our connection Patriots are four and four it

looks like they just beat four and four they just beat the Chargers oh wow that's a good win actually

the Chargers so the Chargers have Justin Herbert who's one of those quarterbacks who is ascending right now one of those young quarterbacks that everybody is saying is just like you know amazing so that's a that's a very good win for the patriots um but uh what do you think what's the one thing i don't know why i'm asking this question like either of us could ever say this with any kind of authority what do you think is the one thing you want the browns to what what do they need to fix to to have a you know a winning season again i mean that's maybe part of my

frustration right now is i don't have a good beat on that but i think that we need to we need to figure out a way to connect with our receivers better you know like Baker's passing uh like I said his um his stats don't look as bad as I think the game looked yesterday but I think that's because a lot of those passing yards are to tight ends which by the way I love a good tight end game that sounded slightly naughty but I do I I love a good tight end game so I'm not trying to dismiss that but when you have OBJ who has this.

had had zero catches yesterday and i think maybe one catch the game before and then landry who's now back in the game i don't think he played last week and he's got drops all over the place and you know landry's i mean you couldn't ask for a better man right like he's out there in the press conference saying this contagious bro it's contagious like again i love these players i don't give a shit about obj anymore like i honestly like i still think that they could maybe do something with the value that he has he's not working out as a brown but i think but that's what they need to fix they need to fix baker connecting to the wide receivers because it's not working

isn't isn't targeting i don't mean the penalty call but i mean isn't targeting the weirdest thing like watching the seahawks game they flashed a stat that was like it had been 31 play there was 31 plays in which dk metcalf was not targeted and then they just started throwing to him and then he had two touchdowns it's like it's it's such a strange thing because it feels like well if you have someone who's really good throw the ball to them as much as you can but it's not that simple as you said and i i believe this uh the coaches are seeing shit we're not seeing like i i hate like the guy in the oversized jersey at the bar or at the game who thinks he knows more about the you know what the play that should be called by the way i've been this guy many times minus the oversized jersey but like i always go with i know these people That are managing these sports Teams are studying this shit closer than I am and yet it is Maddening when it feels like you have Someone who's good target Them just throw it to them try to Throw it to them see what happens and I know Double teams and schemes kind of an impact On that but it is a weird thing the other

Thing I was especially with DK by the way Especially with him because he just seems like he's like from Another planet as far as his I got no

Joy out of seeing him just burn Shaq Griffin though who I Love oh really oh that's funny That's who was guarding him the whole game.

Oh, that's funny. No, because I love Shaq. I like Shaq, too, but, you know, our guy.

I would rather him do it on Jalen Ramsey of the Rams. I'd rather him do it on someone who I actively dislike. I love Shaq. I was very sad when Shaq left the Seahawks. So I wish it would have come on someone who I have a preexisting condition of hating. But the other thing I was thinking is, you know what is really weird about the quarterback position is I think short throws are harder than we understand as the viewer. Like you would think a five-yard pass would just be like easier than a 50-yard pass. But I actually think sometimes 50-yard passes are potentially easier because there's more space and there's fewer defenders. I was just watching Trevor Lawrence just continue to doink six yard passes yesterday like a dude is open and he somehow throws it into the turf. And I'm like, how are you this bad at this job? Like you were a Heisman winner. You were, you know, taken, I think, maybe number one overall. And I think it's because those passes are way harder than we realize. And when someone like Russell is executing it or even, you know, Gino yesterday, it sort of seems easy. But I think those are way harder passes than I realize as a person who's never played NFL quarterback. By the way, do you know I've never played NFL quarterback? You've never played quarterback in the National Football League? In the USFL, I was an Albany Patroon. That's actually a CBA team. That's not even the same sport, but it's just a funny name to me.

Oh, pardon me. I didn't mute myself. I need one of those mute buttons that you have.

Oh, like I have over here that I brought with me to my girlfriend's apartment?

Exactly. So can I tell you the story, Luke? Please. I mean, I don't like that you got a bad beat, but I'm intrigued. And so here's my day. So, again, I'm making this over. I'm being overly dramatic about this, but I was just – when I saw this news, I was done, and this is where my evening really changed. So I am – I watched the Browns game. I watched the Seahawks game. I come home. Genevieve is actually was watching the Seahawks game with our friends at another bar kind of across town. And I I didn't meet up with them because I didn't want to miss any of the game that the travel time would have cost me. That's why I was at Teddy's. So anyway, so I come home. I'm a little bit tuned up. I'm very happy that the Seahawks really rolled. Like I said, that they were dominant, that they didn't just squeak out a win. They did what they needed to do, which was be dominant and give us some faith. So I'm feeling I'm feeling a little bit better. I'm still really upset about the Browns. Our roof deck area is covered. covered in leaves and so i'm like all right i'll take out some of my frustration that last time i raked leaves in anger was the time the seahawks beat the browns a couple years ago that's an oasis song right don't rake leaves in anger i heard her say um and uh so anyway now i think i may be even listening to a little bit of the um to a little bit of the world series i thought the braves were gonna win yesterday they got a Thank you. grand slam in the first day they're like like oh maybe the world honestly okay i i'm sorry to

interrupt your your flow here but i that game for me i was watching some of it i really tried to take it as a life lesson for both sports and my real life which is you never flip and know how shit's gonna go like after that grand salami in the first inning i was like well these guys are cooked like you just never know um was and i tried to i was like i want to try to like integrate that into my my sort of perhaps philosophy of life you know the perhaps philosophy your perhaps philosophy i didn't invent it but it's like basically the story is and i'll try to do this quickly because i totally interrupted you but basically like a guy um uh he he he uh he has a horse he's like a farmer somewhere and you know i don't know china he has a horse and it runs away and everyone says oh that's so sad your horse ran away and he says uh perhaps and then the next day the horse comes back, and everyone's like, oh, that's so great, you got your horse back, and he says, perhaps, and then his son is riding the horse and gets bucked off and breaks his ankle, and then everyone's like, that's so sad that your son broke his ankle, and he says, perhaps, and then the next day the army comes by, and they're taking, they're conscripting young men to go off to the war and die, and they can't take his son because he has a broken ankle, and he says, perhaps, you know what I mean? It's kind of like, man, that was a crazy game, and I would have definitely thought that the Astros were done for after giving up those four runs. Yeah, and I

didn't follow the rest of the game because I got this fantasy news that really just put an end to my day. And again, I know I'm being such a big baby about this. And also, keep in mind, I'm kind of loaded while I'm throwing these leaves off the roof

as well. At some point... I want to channel this. I love that you are drunk, but productive. I get very unproductive when I'm drunk.

Yeah, I just had a lot of energy. I mean, it's still afternoon time and also i just came home and i again i think a lot of puttering type of stuff for me is is like i will find myself in a moment of where i want to put control on something i wasn't thinking your thought yesterday but i think i just came home and i saw that roof again you know i've been staring at it getting worse and worse and worse i'm just like now now is when i take care of this so anyway here's where here here's the background on my fantasy team so i'm in a league this year that i um have never been in before a friend of mine who i don't know all too well said you know my my wife is the commissioner we need one more person uh you want to buy into this i'm like sure i'll buy in i don't know any of these people it doesn't matter it's not like it's not like i have something to prove but when you're new what's your team name um oh i well dac prescott is my quarterback so the name of my team is baby got dac and i that's good yeah um and so like i do think i have the best name on the league that's that's one thing But I joined at the very last minute, and I couldn't join them for draft day, so it auto-drafts. And then I go 0-4, and, you know, there's not a lot you can do in the first few weeks because you have the best team available at that point, right? There are no injuries. You have all the best players that are not taken. So, you know, I'm watching. I'm like, hey, listen, it was an auto-draft situation. I joined this league, whatever. I'm 0-4. I'm surprised you didn't win the first couple weeks with Dak because he was really rolling. I know. And the thing is, I also have, what's his name? C.D. Lamb, who is a real connection. That's a real connection. So if they're cooking, that's really good for me. And I just, again, I just kind of lost. I didn't care. I wasn't super emotionally invested. I didn't like the fact that I started the season 0 and 4, but I wasn't in my head about it because it just wasn't happening, right? But then over the past couple of weeks, I've started working the wires pretty hard, and I'm like, you know, I'm squeaking out some wins. And I went from being the absolute last in this division to the absolute middle of this division. I ended up, I went into this week in fifth place out of 10 teams, and I'm three and four. Now, this week, I am going up against, I don't know who this person is, somebody named Scott. It's not even a good name. Scott's Sweller Team is the name of this team I'm playing. Come on, Scott, do better. But they are the division leader, and they've been dominating. I don't know what their record is right now, but they're pretty dominant. Like, they are in first place, I believe, with a bullet.

They have Kyler Murray, probably, or something.

That's exactly right, my friend. Wow, you're really honing in on this, because I don't know how much you were paying attention to what was going on. So I'm like, boy, it would be really great if I could knock off a game against the person who's in first place. And also, that would put me at 4-4, really climb the ladder, really show these people what old Uncle Andy's got, right? And so then Thursday— Baby's got Dak. Baby got Dak. you got you got arizona with kyler murray who's just i mean that's the reason this person's fantasy team is so good you got arizona playing green bay now i'm in the unenviable position of having to root for green bay in this situation because first as a seahawks fan you want to see arizona get the loss and also um as a as a fantasy owner going up against kyler murray you want to see them get a little loss so there i am rooting for green bay you're welcome lisa of and apologies stew and apologies stew exactly i actually did feel bad about that um and kyler murray sucks he's having the worst game he throws he and i ended up not even seeing the fourth quarter when he threw he ended the game in the final couple of moments interception through an interception in the end zone shades

of quincy like that really took me i know it's not the stakes are not as high but that really took me back to the Super Bowl for the Seahawks. Oh, right, yeah. Like, you're on the five. At a minimum, you're getting a field goal out of this. How do you throw an interception?

And so I'm suddenly like, so he is, according to the algorithm, Scotty's Sweller team is, you know, looking like it'll probably beat me, but it's going to be close. Then Thursday night happens. Now I'm favored because Kyler Murray gets nine fantasy points. He lays the rare egg. Lays the rare egg. The machine had him coming in at about 30 points. He gets nine points. You're set. I am thinking about this. I'm like, okay, this is great. And then I go to the wires. I get a better kicker. I bring in. Oh, and also, I had Sam Darnold. Whoever, I needed a backup.

Mono.

I had a backup quarterback. I needed to play a backup quarterback last week. I don't think I had one. Sam Darnold was the best bet. So I played Sam Darnold last week, and he got pulled from the game. He got like two fantasy points for me somehow.

Wow, they pulled him like not for injury, but for ineffectiveness.

They benched him, yeah. Now I got two fantasy points. The average quarterback gets between 25 and 30 fantasy points. I got two fantasy points, still miraculously won last week. So maybe I should focus on that miracle. But now here I am. You have Arizona laying an egg, Kyler Murray laying an egg on Thursday night. I got Dak Prescott. I am making some adjustments. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I'm watching the red zone yesterday. Ted, he's along with the Seahawks game. I'm seeing my numbers come in. Oh, I pick up Carson Wentz is what I was going to say before. I realize I got to drop Sam Darnold. I'm going to pick up Carson Wentz, but I'll leave him on the bench for now because Dak is still my guy. So I got a Wentz on the bench, as I keep on telling Genevieve yesterday. I love it. Which might be the name of today's no-point conversion. And Wentz does well. Wentz gets 21 points, but I'm like Dak is going to do better than that. That's okay. I think I got this it's the last slice making the desk go down sorry it's the last last slice of hope I have for um feeling okay going to bed on Sunday night I know that feeling too in that like it's

sort of shifting shifting priorities or shifting like when your team doesn't win then you your brain starts looking for something else to just kind of invest its hope in Luke about I don't know

in half hour into the game i'm not watching the football game i'm outside raking leaves and listening to the world series and i'm like oh oh i gotta check on dak and cd lamb and see if they're connecting how are they doing i look down at my um and the game is like i say maybe maybe 20 minutes into like 20 minutes real time into the um into the dallas game i just look down at my app and i start at cd lamb the wide receiver 20 or at that point it was like i don't know like four or five six points or something i'm like okay just getting started and then i look up at prescott and i'm like well how does prescott have zero if his wide receiver has points how does my quarterback not have points and i google it they scratched them they scratched them an hour before the game man i was going to pull off a miracle with a kyler murray rare egg lay i now and you could have if you would have known that and i got a wince on the bench i got 20 points on the bench I got a Wentz on the bench, Luke. If you started Wentz, you would have been fine.

You would have won.

I would have won handily.

Right now, Luke, the score is 104. You got to follow that Adam Schefter in the bag for NFL shill tweet account.

Right now, my fantasy score is 104 points to 101 points. Rounding away from it. All of my players, I'm winning by three points. Does he have anybody going Monday night? Somebody I haven't heard of, I hope they're not really good, their name is Travis f***ing Kelsey.

Oh, that guy gets, like, no catches. Just getting started in the league, I think. He rarely celebrates a catch with a masturbation reenactment. I'm so... Hey, you know what? You know what, my friend? I'm so, so mad. To quote my favorite band, the Hot Chocolates, I believe in miracles. Where are you from? Game day scratch.

Kelsey could get scratched. Kelsey's not good is Kelsey see here's the thing Dak has been listed as questionable but he's been questionable almost all season I think since week two which kills me so I'm like oh so I'll just I'll just play like I'm like I haven't I'm not

I honestly think that if I had paid a little bit more attention to maybe what was going on in the news, I might have seen this warning. And I also didn't I wasn't sure if Wentz has not been consistent. So I thought Wentz was definitely a backup. But then we have a really good game by Wentz and he's on my bench. And I didn't know that Dak could actually get pulled.

I know it's I was shocked to see him because I was watching the game with interest because of our friend, the stew bot, because they were playing Minnesota. And I was confused. used it i'm surprised there's a backup quarterback in the nfl at least a second string quarterback that i don't i've literally never heard of and the the guy for dallas i had literally never heard that name before like it was not a mccown um or so you know i was watching the game and i was shocked to see that dac was in like street clothes and it just i don't mean to be the bearer of bad news but it sounds like it's like a four-week thing well i mean i'll put wentz in there but

like and we'll see what happens but it was just like it was just off the bench i'm gonna take wentz off the bench uh i just uh it's just it just killed me and again i know we're talking about fantasy football and you know what like i honestly think i just have the best girlfriend in the world because she's out with friends you know she was at the caroline watching the game and getting a little tipsy herself i think and then she comes home and like i am i am so sour not towards her like i'm not i'm not you know but i just come home i'm just like vives i'm just in a bad place i'm just like and i can't even talk about it because it's stupid fantasy football now she watched the browns game with me so she knew i was bumming already um and she was and you know and like i'm embarrassed to admit that a fantasy football development has me at the end of a long soggy day well that's the thing is that's the straw but she's just like your camel she's like oh andrew what can i do she's like i'm like it's stupid it's just fantasy football She's like, I know, but your feelings are real. I'm like, oh, thank you so much. That's really touching. You have this drunk, muddy, I think I'd showered from raking the leaves at this point, but just like this man boy stomping around the house, and she's not just like, hey, dummy, it's fantasy football. It doesn't matter. She's like, it just sucks. I'm like, it does just suck. Thank you. I'm going to bed now. Well, maybe that's... And I went to bed at 830. I literally did. I'm like, done. That's a good call, by the way. Done. I drank too much today.

I'm going to bed at 830 and I did maybe that's the silver lining not to tell you how to feel but like that's awesome that that was Viv's reaction and you know that's the perhaps

what if perhaps she was being nice to me because she knows she's breaking up with me tomorrow and didn't want to pile on but then you and I can find a loop together that's true we could really perhaps you'll murder me after one week anyway so that was my betting my friend we gotta get No. See, that's what I was thinking about. I was like, oh, my God. Like, again, like this is a buy in league, but not for tons of money. And I was like 50 bucks or something. And I never expected to really win. I just was doing it for fun. But I was thinking like, this is how I feel just based on kind of pride and not even pride. I don't know who this other person is. It's not like me and this person are going to meet up and shit talk each other. It's just like, you know, I was just hopeful for my team. I was feeling a little proud of myself for managing to come up from nothing with an auto-drafted team and scrape out some wins and then to take advantage of – I just really felt like the universe was giving me something with the Kyler Murray situation and then just to watch that evaporate at the last minute. And I'm just so mad at myself. Well, again, it has not fully evaporated. You never know. Kelsey could be a scratch. All right. Does anybody know Kelsey? Can somebody call his cell phone?

Kelsey could get concussed. I mean, you don't wish that. But I'm just saying it exists as a possibility.

Oh, yeah, I don't want that to happen.

Kelsey could have, by the way, the likelihood is Kelsey will get around 40 points. Yes. Who are they playing?

Actually, I don't know who they are playing, but I can tell you here in a second.

Dude, I think that the Chiefs are due for a, this is not helping, but they are due for just a get right game. Yeah. Because they've just been getting pummeled. They got crushed by Tennessee last week. Oh, and they're playing the Giants, so I think that's an opportunity, right? Ooh, that tends to be a get healthy thing. Well, again, maybe you never know. What does he need to get three points? One catch? Oh, wow. The Giants are only two and five. I knew they weren't great, but I thought they were hanging in the middle of the pack. No, the Giants, no problems. The Giants and the Jets, it's quite something to know that the two teams that are based more or less in the most dynamic city in America, with the biggest media market in america cannot put a team on the field that can win games it's very strange forever too like this just goes yeah since like mark bavaro i remember the like freeman mcneil jets and the mark bavaro giants that's about the last time i think the jets had a moment like 10 years ago where they were kind of good i forget who their quarterback was but They sort of, they got hot for a minute, but the Giants.

Actually, well, I mean, the Giants won, like, Eli Manning, I think, won two Super Bowls with them. The David Tyree catch, where David Tyree pinned the ball against his helmet to beat the Patriots. So, you know, I guess it hasn't been forever, but it is just strange that for all that money and all that attention, neither of those teams can play football right now.

Yeah, yeah. And I tend to, you know, I tend to root for them when I don't have a rooting interest, you know, specifically against them, too.

Let me ask you a quick question as we wrap this up. Yeah, yeah. Who are we rooting for in the World Series? As I very sourly put it on Twitter yesterday, I don't know who to be more excited for, the team with the racist chant or the team that got caught cheating the last time they won this.

Yeah, that racist chant is the only thing that really sucks about it. I mean, peace and love to the fans of all the other teams who were in the pennant races. But, like, I was the only one when it was down to four that I found palatable was Atlanta because they weren't the Dodgers and they weren't the stupid Red Sox. And so – well, New York was out of it. Boston knocked them out. Who was the other – who am I leaving out of this, the third big money team? Well, whatever, either way. So basically I've been quietly rooting for Atlanta, and then I start actually paying attention. I haven't really been paying attention to the games, just kind of looking at the box scores. And then I actually turn on the Atlanta radio station yesterday. I'm listening to it, and immediately you hear those chants. And you're just like, oh, son of a gun, man Can I have one thing to root for? I know, and it kills me to root for Houston Oh, Houston, of course, right I mean, that's the scene that I wasn't mentioning

It kills me to root for Houston But on the other hand, the racism and the fact that they're leaning into it I'm pals with this guy, Kurt Streeter Who's a sports columnist now for the Times, the New York Times And he wrote this great piece about it It's just like they're leaning into it Like, it's borderline MAGA in that there's an easy way for this. You can still like your team, and you don't have to do a thing that's actively racist. Like, it can totally happen. And yet, the people that are going to that baseball stadium, a lot of them, not everybody. I don't know every person in that stadium. But too many of them are digging their heels in on being able to do this so-called tomahawk chop, which is just so gross.

It really is gross. Hey, speaking – while we're on baseball here for a second, we should also just maybe mark the end of an era. It's official. Kyle Seeger is a free agent for the first time.

They told him by email. Did you see that?

Yeah, but I'm sure that's just a formality. Like they knew. Obviously, they gave him the –

It's like HR telling me I haven't taken my cybersecurity training.

Are you all set for all that stuff now, by the way?

I am, by the way. I did it on an airplane.

I was very proud of myself. You have another training.

The anti-harassment.

Yeah, you have another training, though, that actually has to be like a Zoom meeting with breakout sessions.

Yeah, that one I'm going to—

You haven't done that yet?

I'm currently planning on thinking about that. Yeah.

Anyway, yeah, so Kyle Seeger, I mean, again, it was over during the last game of the regular season when there was a very tearful— He got a good send-off. Oh, so good, yes. You've got to love that. So good.

And I guess it's just basically that we asked this, I think, on this very show, or at least I asked you about it, maybe IRL at the game. But basically it was that Someone else is going to pay him more money That's basically the deal His contract is up with us And we cannot prioritize the amount of money To keep him at third base That someone else is going to be willing to pay him And we also have young up-and-comers In the infield

Yeah, and I think we have It wasn't Toro who we brought over Abraham Abraham Toro who we put at second base But is really a natural third baseman And they're just building for the future now And so and again, Kyle is not, you know, it's funny because I was talking with some folks in the Slack. It might have even been our buddy John who works with us at APM. And he's like, it is kind of he never fully understood. It was somebody or maybe there's a couple of people saying like the connection and the love that Seattle has for Kyle Seeger never really made sense to me. And I think people outside of this market, nobody really understands it because Kyle has always been pretty frustrating at the plate. He goes really hot and really cold in streaks. He's great. I mean, he's a golden glover at third base and he's solid there. But it truly is an emotional thing Like I don't think that the Mariners are going to be Worse without him and you got to Start building for the future but you know He was a Mariner he was drafted by the Mariners And he was a Mariner for you know Almost a decade and so you know it's just And he just seems like a good guy I think He seems like a good guy you often have Not insights but Feelings about players impulses Impulses about players that actually maybe sometimes End up being right you were more right about Fraley as like kind of an Anti-vaxing guy well I love a good firmer

modesto nut yeah get me wrong but i'm also i just assume most of the white people in baseball have bad takes and there are exceptions but my experience is it's generally not good but um but no you i mean the thing is i'm trying to think

think of somebody else that the Mariners drafted who played as long for the Mariners as Kyle Siegel did, he might actually be in a very weird category, which is maybe Ken Griffey Jr. But like the, it seems like what happens for the Mariners is if they actually draft somebody and they actually turn out to be good, then we lose them when their first contract renegotiation comes up. See Alex Rodriguez, see, you know, many other players. And so Kyle Siegel, probably because he wasn't better he was good enough to be a contributor to our team but he wasn't so good that the yankees wanted him who wanted to pay him a billion dollars or wanted to trade us nine you know the minor leaguers for him or whatever that he sort of stayed for a long time but there's something to that like there's something to the fact that he was a very very very long lived mariner so i also follow his wife on twitter and she seems awesome i also think

there's something that is very emotional about the Mariners fan base and culture that I actually kind of like you know like you know Kyle Seeger is saying his goodbyes when they pull him out of the game out of the final game specifically so that he can get a goodbye and like you know like he's crying the rookies are crying like there's just like oh there's crying in baseball and like there's there's heart and soul here and emotion and like when the big trade happened in like Seattle you have by the way you have

what's his name? J.P. Crawford crying, saying, I'm basically taking over the mantle from Kyle

Seeger. Yes. And like I almost I don't think there was a Kellinick who, you know, only knew Seeger for, you know, for one season, basically got to play with him for three quarters of the season. He's crying because Seeger is probably a bit of a hero to him. Anyway, I kind of don't mind that we're an irrational fan base. I think I was trying to share with people the emotion that was happening both in the locker room, in the dugout, and among the fan base when that much-decried trade happened, like right after we had—

Kendall Graveman, who I was watching pitch in the World Series yesterday.

Yes, exactly. When we traded, we were in the middle of a series against the Astros, and we had just—and I was at this game, as you know, Luke, probably my favorite in-person sports moment— when we were down by, I think we were down by eight or maybe even down by eight in the second inning. And then we come back and we beat the Astros and it's like kind of midseason and it's starting to feel like we have some playoff energy. It was incredible. And then the very next day, it was like management was like, we can't let you be happy. So they trade away our closer, Kendall Graveman, and they bring in Toro. And it might not have ended up being that terrible of a trade. We also, a couple of days later, kind of brought in another closer who ended up being a disaster in Castillo. But I'm rambling now. My point is I was trying to like there were all these stories about the players like being really emotional, like angry, emotional and crying, emotional about losing Kendall Graveman in the middle of the season. And I was trying to explain that to some folks who are fans of other teams, like my friend who happened to be in town and had gone to that game, that Mariners Astros game with me the night before. And she's like, it's just she couldn't wrap her head around players acting this way about a trade. It's just like it's business. We've all seen Moneyball. It's like people come and go. But like our fan base and our players were super emotional about that. And it might not be normal baseball, but I kind of like it.

I wonder if that's the result or the if that's because of how bad the Mariners have been all these years. Like, there's that amazing John Boyce kind of piece that's like a three-parter about the Mariners and the history of the Mariners and stuff, in which the key in his—I forget who he collaborated with on that, but they say, like, the Mariners are one of the weirdest teams in the history of pro sports, and we're going to prove that to you. I wonder if, yeah, kind of how hard the feelings hit is because of that for the players and certainly for the fans.

Yeah, I could definitely see that. By the way, the only other player that's kind of, and of course he had a, you know, he's going to be remembered very differently, and he's a Hall of Famer, but Ichiro, not drafted, but brought over by the Mariners and remained a Mariner and remained loyal. And also you could say the same thing about Felix Hernandez as well. You know, there was this weird loyalty with him. Larry Hernandez? Larry Hernandez. Like, when he was at his peak, he had the opportunity to go to a more successful team. Instead, he gave the best years to the Mariners when they gave him zero run support.

He won a Cy Young, and I don't even know if he was over .500.

Right, and yet he stuck around only to completely flame out in a pretty embarrassing way in front of a team that was now finally starting to heat up, and then he lost his stuff. But there is this weird connection, I think, players have, a loyalty to Seattle. I agree. I agree, and I guess I'll take it, right? Because Lord knows.

Although I'm.

I'm and this usually is the absolute kiss of death, but I am feeling pretty optimistic about next summer. I'll tell you what my new apartment has room for my little barbecue. I got a chair out there and I'm already thinking about grilling up some veggie dogs and listening to baseball games like I'm I'm I'm already pretty jazzed about baseball.

You know, you're a Mariners fan when you're already thinking about next year's season when the postseason hasn't ended yet.

Yeah, that's the number one sign of being a Mariners fan, is not having your team actively in it, but thinking about how we're going to really shore up the middle infield and maybe give a run next year. We like to keep our autumns free. All right, well, this has been, again, I'm really sorry about the Browns, but this has been fun, if that isn't a weird thing to say.

And I hope the fantasy story paid off enough. I felt like it built that up the whole show.

For me, because I'm going to get you to start sports betting. Five bucks. Five bucks here and there. But, man, I'll tell you what. You want a little sunshine in your pocket. Yeah, definitely. Get a DK Metcalf touchdown. Have DK Metcalf score the first touchdown when you bet $10 and you win $110 and you're golden for the weekend.

Sounds like I have the emotional fortitude for that. Sounds like that's exactly what I need.

There will not be a leaf unraked in your neighborhood. You'll be down at Green Lake. What is that guy doing? And he's working off his sports bet anger.

By the way, I don't have a rake either. I did it all with a broom. Wet leaves. Whoa. Shitty broom.

How does the putterer's children go without a rake? I don't know, man. How do you not have a rake?

Well, because we don't have a lawn. We've never been responsible for upkeep of our apartments before, for the infrastructure or whatever. The roof, though. In this case, here we are on the roof.

You should have just raked from Biden in the infrastructure plan?

I should have just got. I'm pretty sure Manchin cut that shit out, too. I know I know but Anyway I think Vives and I Are probably thinking we're probably not going to resign here We're going to be kind of looking around maybe for A place going Kyle Seeger on it and Yeah and so we were like we will buy a rake For the next house we're not buying a rake for This apartment so anyway

I want you to buy a broom well you have a broom But I want you to buy one of those push brooms So that when the Mariners are sweeping People next season you can like stand in front of your TV holding the push broom up I always love the people who bring that broom to the baseball game for the sweep as opposed to a traditional like straight broom oh i just mean anyone who brings any broom to the baseball game is my hero because that seems like a hassle

i want to dress up like who is the famous cartoon character i don't want to it's it's not um it's not willie from the simpsons but is there another janitor in the simpsons or am i confusing it with like archie comics who's like whereas uh just you're probably top and bottom and has this uh A little cap and a mustache and mumbles and always has a push broom. Are you thinking of Andy Cap?

No. The British cartoon. It's definitely not animated. I don't think it's The Simpsons because that is like, you know, Willie is the kind of there's only room for one janitor on The Simpsons, I believe.

Maybe. Let's figure this out. I know that we're not doing TBTL now.

Why don't we figure it out next week? It'll give people something to listen to.

Yeah, that sounds good. I think I've got it here. No, that's not him. Oh, okay, who is it? No, no, no, that's just Willie's full name. I'll figure this out. Oh, oh, oh. I just like to make those noises. No, you know what it is? I enjoy that. It's Futurama. The janitor on Futurama is a more traditional kind of like janitor looking guy.

Oh, that guy in here. He kind of has that voice. This is why you thought of The Simpsons, though, because that's sort of a cousin of The Simpsons universe.

Yes, exactly. What's his name? So good. I'm glad I can end the segment on what's his name. thank you you're in portland you got to get that right i do i'm looking out at lovejoy actually i

can see lovejoy street from where i'm at his name is scruffy scruffington by the way all right let's uh let's wrap this up my goodness let me look at the clock wow an hour and four minutes this is a long no point it is you're welcome listeners no point either you're welcome listener yeah whoever's left all right uh thanks thank you for listening everybody thanks for uh you know hanging out with us on this thing we'll be here next week i guess we'll just be browns only oh yeah i guess so all right it'll be a short and sweet yeah bangles oh god be prepared for me to be in a you guys are gonna win by you know what i'm gonna i'm gonna do this i'm gonna bet i hope i can't imagine this but i would love it if the browns were actually underdogs because i'm gonna bet on them the browns are gonna win by two touchdowns yeah

Yeah, I bet you the Browns are not going to go into this game, as I like to say, overdogs. Am I ready for betting yet? Can I get my betting license yet? I want to bet on the overdog.

Is it in Cincy or is it in Cleveland? It's in Cincinnati. Oh, dude. It's not even going to be close.

I love this. This is what I'm talking about. Somehow you're more energized about them. Oh, because you think they're going to be undervalued even more so because it's a road game.

Yeah, because they had a rough game, but I don't think Cincy is for real. Again, based on nothing. And I just think that the Browns are a good team, and it's going to click, and it's going to be like, holy shit, where was that? That's what I think we're all going to be saying, and I'm going to be laughing all the way to the bank.

When do you start to see odds? I've got to look at the app on my phone. I don't know. The Bengals. Let's see here. The Brown. Yeah, what are the Bengals? The Bengals must be probably favored about two and a half. I'm trying to figure this out here. It's one of those things. It's like you look up a recipe online, but they've got to give way too much context for it just to get you to scroll. It doesn't look like this article I'm on actually lands on anything here. So, all right. We'll have to see. I wasn't sure. Do you get odds usually like this early in the NFL week? We haven't even really finished the weekend yet.

I'm just booting up the app now. Yeah, we might as well. What else are we doing? We've been here for an hour and five minutes now. Why not? Let's see what it's telling me. So there's like the money line bet is just who's going to win. Okay. And that doesn't even need the point spread. So here we go. Let's see. I'm scrolling. Cleveland Browns, Cincinnati Bengals. Yeah, so if I bet on the Browns, let's see, just to win, just the money line, if I bet $50 on the Browns, I win $115. Okay. Right now. So the Browns are an underdog. Right. Now, I don't know how to convert that into points. Well, let's see here. The spread. The spread. Oh, my God. Andrew, when I'm right, I'm right. The spread is the Bengals by two and a half. So basically, if you want to bet on the Bengals and you want to win your money, they have to win by three points at a minimum. Or you can bet on the Browns and they have to just lose by less than two and a half points.

So they have this way tighter than I thought. Okay.

But see, that's the crazy thing about the NFL. Hell, that's why me saying that the Browns are going to win by two touchdowns is that that's a spicy take. Because it's wild how often these games come down to like three points. That's why two and a half points seems like nothing. But the likelihood is it'll end up being a three-point game somehow.

I don't know how they know, but they just do. And the Bengals, of course, are going to be trying to prove something after that embarrassing loss to the Jets.

Which is why me betting the Browns to win by 14, you know what? I can probably figure that out right now. I bet you like $10 on the Browns to win by 14 is it pays handsomely because nobody thinks it's going to happen.

Well, here's another thing I got going for me or we have going for us is I kind of got a little shirty with you and kind of got up on my high horse about the high horse about how the Bengals are playing. And whenever I do that, I end up being wrong. So that's good. Maybe I'll be like a happy, embarrassed boy. Oh, I would love to see you as a happy, embarrassed boy. Oh, can we go out with that Bell and Sebastian song, Happy, Embarrassed Boy?

do it he was in grade school he overestimated joe burrow i feel like every bell and sebastian

song starts with someone being in grade school i think you're right they go back god all right

i wish we could go out with bell and sebastian but of course we have a tradition on this program which is to go out with a bad finger so we will do that but before that we'll remind you that when you're talking about the no point there is absolutely no tangent too long or janitor too

strong no matter what you are I will always be with you doesn't matter what you do girl Blue girl with you No matter what you do I will always be around

Won't you tell me what you want