Muse

You know, America's 250th birthday is coming up. That's going to be a big cake. And who's even going to blow out the candles, I wonder? Probably maybe Thomas Jefferson will come down from the clouds and huff and puff a few out. Maybe Betsy Ross or Frederick Douglass. I don't know. Somebody is going to come on down and just huff and puff them cake candles out. Happy 250th, America. and an iconic summer like this deserves an iconic drink. I'm talking about Mountain Dew. Yep, an American original. From their beginnings in the foothills of Tennessee, yeah, that's where they started, to the biggest 4th of July yet, the refreshing citrus kick of Mountain Dew is the perfect companion to your American summer adventures. USA, baby. And you know, I get that taste of Mountain Dew in me, and it just makes my ankles start talking to each other. God, I love it. Enjoy the refreshing kick of Mountain Dew, an American original, tasting great since 48. Look for American Dew limited time packaging or find it in stores near you at mountaindew.com. That's mountaindew.com. This episode is sponsored by Mountain Dew. Look for American Dew limited time packaging or find it in stores near you at mountaindu.com. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian, podcaster, and just a downright cosmic adventurer. He's got his own show, The Duncan Trussell Family Hour, and his new podcast, Mystery Boys, with Kurt Metzger. Always a blast, the one and only Mr. Duncan Trussell. And I will find a song I've been singing I'm on this Whoa

Look at that What kind of cameras are you guys Jesus Christ You're so inspirational

These are flock cameras we're using

Yeah Palantir baby Palantir

We now work for Palantir these are we're using flock cameras it's incredible see this can see right all the way through my eyes through my past my history all the way into my mother's body past lives yes

gets into your past incarnations too it's pretty cool tech is amazing these days we good zach good lighting you guys are good look at this shit what do you mean you have a podcast you fuck dude this is next level you're like i love josh and my studio is great but i don't have this

like i look at me i look good in this light dude you definitely bro you look i will say this it's the lighting it's conestoga wagon times right like it's the old days and it's like you know yes it's there's a conestoga wagon yes and it's stalled out on the side of the road right yes because anything could have happened when you had a conestoga wagon because you had wooden wheels remember yeah i do and dude you could have gotten termites overnight of many things termites i mean

Just think of wooden wheels on some old fucked up. There's no way he's paving roads back then. You're going through forest creeks.

Your wife is guessing where a road could be.

If she's still alive, she doesn't have an arrow through her throat. If she's not choking on her own blood spray. Your wagon's stained with blood.

Yeah, you had 11 kids. Your wife has had kids this week. This week. Like that's, it was like that. People don't realize what it was like. Oh no, no, people don't. We know because we've had past lives. Yeah, I remember. oh dude i remember sitting on like a um like a hillside or whatever because everything back then was a hillside yeah all hills remember that all hills remember everything was hillside it's like now there's like a lot of pavement there's flattened areas thank you cern the fucking

particle accelerator fucked everything up now there's flat places it used to just be a series

of hills everything was a hillside everything dude even people's bodies you'd have one like of the strong side of your father and the weaker side because of how he walked to work that's right you know because you'd have to walk at an angle and everybody was diagonal yes everybody walked diagonally it was so different but dude in the like your wagon could easily you wake up in the night some termites had showed up right like a gang of termites or italians some people called them right yep showed up yep and ate a spoke off your wagon wheel that's right and you got a flat

Well, Italians used to eat wood, so you would literally, you didn't even know what it was. Was it like a wild ravaging group of Italians or was it termites? Yeah, you'd have no idea. Yeah, Conestoga wagon wood was like the precursor to pizza, apparently.

Oh, it's called the first pasta in some cultures, dude, that's the craziest thing.

Doesn't Conestoga mean pasta?

needs pasta wagon well dude it's just of course like you could see like some strong jawed italian showing up right i mean he's just john well he's so strong jaw just because you know his neck and everything is strong from wearing all of his chains they wore like all the chains yep and he's so jacked and he just sees a fucking warm wagon wheel it's warm because it's been rolling

all day yeah plus the stink of birth of wagon birth yeah and then yeah you'd hear him come slithering out of the woods down the hill you're lucky if you were on top of a hill because if you're at the bottom they just sled on down dude you'd be standing at the bottom of the hill and

an italian would just roll right up against your leg yep they just that's how it is gravity and

italians dude back then their stomachs were just like like calloused underneath the hair it was from sliding down those hills attacking the wagons is a thick sheeny callus to help them slide yeah terrifying times people are a historic these days and then you know if we don't remember history we're fucked like you've got to know what actually happened what this country was founded on and i

want you to say that word again people are a historic yeah and what does that mean dunkel

it means and they people don't give a fuck about history they don't care no one's looking back nobody no most people don't and not just like with like u.s history world history but like musical lineages and stuff people just don't really care reparations people are looking back

yeah but they've got a that's the that's the ultimate rearview mirror is people right like you if you ride in a car with somebody who's like big on reparations they're like seven rearview

mirrors in their car you notice that that's a lot like but you have to stop like with that kind of thinking you do have to stop at a certain place you can't you have to like stop in a certain frame you can't keep going back right you have to stop there is where you but come on man wouldn't you like if there was some way for you to get reparations wouldn't that be amazing like people start that's that's an incredible income source you know if they can tap it i think one of the

biggest groups um or some of the biggest groups that probably have at least uh called out to the gods of reparations probably in our time would probably be black or i don't know if it's african americans i don't know if it's black people in general but i think it would be some african americans people that came from africa yeah into slavery or their ancestors did and then native americans like what about we that tab was never paid listen this is why we got to invent a time

machine because once we get that fucking time machine we could go back in time to the actual colonizers and slave holders and take their fucking shit that's true reparations because they're the ones who did it right you know what i mean i mean the idea of the reparations is like we i'm i'm not trying to call you out no everybody knows you have slaves now but uh i i i am not a slave owner come on we all know what's going on in nashville come on i'm sorry i don't mean to you guys can cut this out you guys can cut this out no but i on the other hand don't i oh you're the unslave guy not doing as good i don't get the numbers you're getting so so you know you do you should pay reparations but otherwise we got to get a time machine man what would we do though here's

the thing i'm saying this and i'm going to be honest with you we get a time machine yes we go back first of all in time right and we get there the colonizers i just don't how what is our strategy going to be when we get there we've got guns what do they have they have guns that's how they did it

yeah but not not like ar-15s they've got like shitty muskets and stuff it's going to be very

easy to colonize the colonizers no what if there is a metal detector when you get into the time

machine disable it like it's my time machine you don't think you what you think that's just part

of the build like you think time machine is gonna come without tsa dude you think that the government in israel is gonna let us have a time machine without tsa you're right they ruin everything

man they ruin everything you're gonna have like off-market underground time machines that are gonna spaghettify your ass when you travel through time it's not gonna be safe i will say this bro

they will have like there's no way you're getting a tsa free time machine dude you're gonna have like some lady over there who's like oh you got a baby milk in there or something they always like they first the thing i hate is the baby milk or if you're even a woman with full tits they'll be like yeah what's in your tit they'll be like oh what's in your tits is it baby milk dude i feel

so bad for old people pregnants and new parents going through tsa because like they get fucked up they're aggressive with them yeah they like make you disassemble the baby carriage yeah they scan the baby it's like what the fuck yeah they're like you're gonna need to open his diaper up and

i'm like open his diaper up are you doing what do you think's in there it's crazy now i'm a fucking peeping tom just because i'm second in line now it's like i'm getting drawn into crimes uh we're about to travel with

the whole family theo and are you and you and we got a new baby we got a five month old and you just i just got a prep because they do not treat you kindly god help you if you're a breeder and trying to travel on the fourth of fucking july you are my wife i'm fine you just have to stand on the other side and you just watch it happen the pat down the disassembly the scrutinizing of

the tits oh yeah oh that's the worst and the worst is if they look at your wife's tits like

they wouldn't have any milk in them right like what do you think's in there yeah there's a baby right there what do you think she's got nitroglycerin in her tits i think she's fucking yeah why why are you doing this to us the kids are screaming what do you think we're trying to get food into gaza or something like what do you think what's happening here bringing my dad's ashes too to scatter them so it's like going to be double it's going to be the most dramatic TSA of all time because I just am so worried about like what are they going to do with my dad's ashes yeah are they going to search them what's in there yeah what's in my dad's ashes I have no idea

what could be in there sometimes it's a molar I know there has been a look what is that what's the most common thing found in human in dad's ashes and Duncan

good to see you dude good to see you theo thank you for just making the most common thing found in your dad's ashes this is actually interesting take it through this if you don't mind duncan oh i'd love to uh calcium carbonate of course that's some bone stuff trace minerals such as sodium potassium and magnesium trace metals implants like surgical screws pins or dental fillings

after processing bourbon crystals if you had a southern dad oh i see yeah oh just from like uh like salt buildup or something he'd have bourbon crystals build up around his bones crystallized bourbon whiskey i could see that a little bit of uh probably some racial jokes a lot of dads would have like you're just sifting through the sand of your father and like a

just like an n-word flies at least 30 polack jokes you like no one even understood why your dad was always making you didn't you didn't know what a polack was when you were a kid but like they were apparently really dumb based on your

dad's shitty polack jokes oh man dude duncan trussell thanks for being here today dude happy to be here um and dude i want to say also congratulations you and kurt mads grab a new podcast the mystery boys that's right yeah dude it feels like a producer trev and i were he was talking oh is that a bug mosquitoes or a spy could be a spy drone it could be a drone dude if the drones get that small we are they are they already are well let's don't wait if we start there it's

gonna every podcast now starts there by the way whoever's surveying us with your mechanical mosquitoes you're an idiot it's a fucking podcast you could just watch the podcast you don't have to

double film the podcast dude we have we've we've had people on that had the room searched afterwards to make sure that they didn't leave like a listening device or something like that oh yeah

you're getting that level of guests who are living in like it's so crazy how like the more powerful you get the more you live in a surveillance state like you know what i mean like the the trump he's the most surveilled person on the planet right like he lives in the most high security place of all time he must got like and it's not just like secret service monitoring him right it's people

he thinks are his friends that he i bet he doesn't even know that i bet he doesn't even care i bet he

does you think he does you gotta feel that you've got remote viewers from like various countries trained psychic spies you've got ghosts you've got you know a variety eavesdropping ghosts eavesdropping ghosts malevolent entities time travelers you've got witches actively cursing you at every hour of the fucking day think of the way that's why any president look at them look what happens to them they melt down they're crushed by just the sheer weight of occult energy being leveled at them by all variety of sorcerers necromancers garden variety witches like hardcore

mountain wizards you just don't even know what's coming soothsayers rei counter employees yes evil

eyeing you just like you've got the evil eye on you at all time and so you just get all fucked up and you like look at trump he's got those splotches now he's like he's like falling asleep obama look at obama he looked like a ring wraith when he came out oh he was white by the time he get out he was he's told totally like just withered all of them look at this look at 2009 hope joy 2016 you've blown up countless innocent families with drones you know what i mean you can hear just doing clinton's work still doing clinton's work look at fucking lincoln i know all of them it does it to all of them

look at that well first of all there were only two photos ever of lincoln taken so there's all we have is a before and after of him dude yeah it's true um that's true and also

people look like he was probably 23 in both of those pictures dude you know what's pretty wild

i was thinking about this the other day there's not another famous person with the last name lincoln whoa i don't know any lincolns like there's him there's him abraham was that his name or abram abraham abraham lincoln and then mary todd lincoln was his wife yep who was kind of like and then his son tad lincoln i think who died oh shit at a young age um what did tad die of but no other famous lincolns think of one i don't know any that's pretty unbelievable i know like

a lot of people whose first name is lincoln i don't know any famous oh there you go edward baker lincoln he died on february 1st at age three tuberculosis these are the kids these are his children william wallace lincoln wow cool name died at the age of 11 uh typhoid fever thomas lincoln known as tad his cause of death is tuberculosis pneumonia or heart failure

holy shit but people don't people do not understand and we do not understand that this was the president of the united states and three of his kids yeah died by the age of 18 of tuberculosis um whatever the other one was i think just and one of them probably was gay and

they killed him that's always happened that was one out of three kids yeah and then they say

they say that they give it a bigger name yeah like pneumonia heart failure yeah heart yeah Heart failure. We know what happened. But dude, isn't that the craziest way to describe gay? It's like, he should love a woman, but.

He had heart failure. His heart was failing.

But his heart failed and liked men.

And he fell into the pigs. Fell into a pig pen and was devoured.

Yeah.

Dude, I'll tell you.

Really, it looks like he was planning for a beautiful day at a picnic basket.

Yeah, I mean, yeah.

He had a letter to Randall in it, you know.

Dale Randall, I know that you're but a peasant. My father's president.

but you know i'll tell you that's why think of how wild that is you have three children four you have four fucking children four children yeah you just had another child while we're finishing this sentence yep but just imagine that go on anyway what were you saying no you

didn't finish your point imagine like when you have kids you you can no longer watch dateline i used to be able when i was single i could watch dateline some murderer came in killed a bunch of kids exploded a house with kids and it killed a mom and the kids watched and you know it sucks it's it's sad right whatever yes dateline when you have fucking kids anything about a kid dying any it's like your dna changes for real even dads wow so it hits so hard losing three of your children i can't even imagine i can't even imagine you're not sleeping anymore you're you can't you're just a walking corpse you're you're gone your heart is never going to be better after that so that might explain why lincoln looked like shit before he got assassinated no offense but this is what it's like you know this is human existence that's how you know having becoming

a breeder really teaches you when you choose to have something you choose to create more and then we're all we're all victor's always been some form of like at that time where everybody was a slave to the lack of knowledge maybe oh yeah is that

is that a realistic thing oh i think so i think like back then you get an infection you're dead they're sawing your arm off i don't even think they had like they had ether they didn't have like the incredible anesthesia that we have right now where they can dial in just the dose right you know the exact amount of time before you wake up back then i think they were just like putting a rug on your face if you're lucky or somebody sometimes would just whisper

year like this you're not feeling anything you're not feeling anything you're not feeling you don't

feel this you're dreaming you're dreaming you're sawing your fucking arm off that was what it was like back look you're dreaming this is actually great you guys are good 1850s average cause of

death tuberculosis and what was tuberculosis let me say real quick the single biggest killer in many places especially among adults and children which is everyone's a weird thing to say in one 1867 kentucky sample 18 of 100 deaths were from consumption similar patterns held in the 1850s What is consumption? Can you give me some? Can you also?

be looking up what tuberculosis is i think that's what they called it consumption right like that

was the that was the name for consumption but dude imagine you get invited probably one weekend at school you're a school kid right consumption is an archaic historical term for tuberculosis a highly contagious bacterial infection primarily attacking the lungs coughing up blood happened to

edgar allen poe's wife she died of tuberculosis like just everybody you would have little this is i think where the handkerchief in the pocket came from is like if you wanted to politely cough up blood in front of people at dinner parties and stuff so yeah because if you were poor you

just coughed it into your hand or whatever that was what it was like back then but dude imagine one weekend as a kid this this could be a real life of a child back in the day yeah you go to a kid's party one weekend some kid is having his fifth birthday party which at this point is probably one quarter of his life right he's about to go to work in the factories yeah he'll be at

war in two years two years he's gonna be fighting yeah he's getting ready to go to work so this is

like almost working age you go to his birthday and the next weekend you could conceivably go to

a funeral of another of another child or adult every i guarantee that like every sunday you're going to a funeral back then like you like a sunday you're not going to a funeral is a good sunday right just go to any like any old graveyard look at all those little graves dude kids were dying left and right it was a miracle for a kid to survive sometimes it'll be like rick and it was like he's 11 years or something oh yeah yellow fever you know where where i come from in georgia uh the cemetery where my my family's buried it's just like filled with these old graves and it's all yellow fever it's all just weird old diseases and some yellow fever some people think it's

because you people hate asians so much that they die that their heart snaps that's not it right

yeah we're talking about the original one yeah yeah actually yellow fever is my favorite k-pop band like they're i'm just sorry i'm so sorry i do i'm sorry it's hilarious dude um they know what's going on dude do you have you ever heard of peter diamandes no i haven't so he's like it's interesting because there's like a group of people who are who look at the world right now from a historic perspective okay and they're like shit is really good right now and it's

gonna get better that's what rogan always says that shit's the best it's ever been well and

and people hear that if you don't if you don't know this sort of thing and some people don't if you don't realize that like if you have electricity you're doing pretty good like if You're a modern day wizard. Wizard, yeah, exactly. Like you could just flip a switch and lights come on and you could take a shit and flush it and it goes bye-bye. And it goes to a poor neighborhood? Well, that used to go out the window. You'd fucking, you'd shit in a chamber pot, throw it out the window where it would land in puddles of like blood from people with consumption, horse shit, and just- Or just some kids playing.

And I bet he was honestly probably like, good luck. It's almost like, you know, when like a butterfly lands on your shoulder or something now, it's like, good luck. Or if you see a clock, it says 11-11. But like if you were taking a walk and you just got hit by a bit of the king's shit, you know?

Splatted by shit today. Things are looking up.

Yeah. Oh, a bit of a king's shit on me. Yeah, man. Oh, thick shit from the king.

Ah, nothing better than a king's thick shit.

Bro, because no one else had thick shit back then? Only the king's. Who else would have a thick shit?

Everyone's shit was watery, watery shit.

The king's shit. It was Memphis coffee, dude.

Yeah, Memphis coffee.

But the king's shit, he was fucking serving plaster of Paris, brother.

Powerful.

Charismatic. Probably smelled good.

Alluvial.

Yeah, yeah. It was, you know, royal shit.

Medieval kings ate a diet that was far more varied and depending on period and region, often less dominated by meat than the roasted turkey like stereotypes uh roasted meats yeah that seems like normal stuff but um but yeah dude if you god and i bet some people and i bet there were some people almost like they're down on their luck and they would just hang out outside of like a like a because the king's toilets were up like in the air they were built like you know on the second floor or third floor of the castle yeah and just a hole would come out of the wall that

Well, back then, you would, now, I happen to be an expert on sewage systems in castles. Oh, good. No, I want to know about this. I studied it all through school. You'll see here that, now that's nice, but some castles, you would shit down into a pit. And then, the way that you would get lice off your clothes, because every... Everyone was covered in lice back then is you would put your clothes out over an open toilet, a medieval toilet, and all the ammonia from the shit would kill the lice. So you were wearing clothes that had been lice-free, but, you know, like- Shit scented. Smelled like a port-a-potty. Yeah. Smelled like a Coachella port-a-potty. And that was a clean shirt back then.

Yeah. Medieval toilets, commonly known as garter robes, were built over waste shafts or pits that discharged directly into moats. They featured a surprising dual-purpose nobles used the ammonia-heavy air from the toilet pits to store in de-louse clothing as the fumes were believed to kill clothes, lice, and fleas. Dude, that's unbelievable. Like, God, you smell like shit, but God. No lice. No lice. Come on over. No lice. You get to pick. Yeah. Come on over and touch this puss. Come on over. Or touch this wiener if you were gay. I just de-loused

my underwear. Yeah.

Oh.

Oh, lice-free pussy back then. God. Can you imagine going, finally, you don't have lice crawling all over your face.

Or your vagina or the end of your wiener if you're a man. Dude, the very end of your wiener almost looks like a little bit of like a vagina. You notice that? Are you kidding? That's all I think about. Yeah.

It does, though. Oh, it does. Mine is special. Oh, yeah. it's amazing you could you can i will it's another pocket when i was a child they had i had a i was

born with a very small wiener hole so i could pee like 15 feet did it expand i had to go get a surgery you really did yeah so you're it was fused a little bit yeah it's a little fused dude and i mean i could piss dude i could wash a cat's eye from 15 feet away yeah so good did you ever wash

a cat's eye i mean i could have dude you could have that's must have been painful though

Oh, I'd surprise a fucking, and nobody knew it was urine because it just came at such a, a rip.

A fucking rip of fucking yellow piss.

Oh, it was like, uh.

Probably loud.

Oh, and it had a Roger Clemens sort of, it was a.

That's painful. It's like pissing on ecstasy.

It hurt. Oh, oh, it started to burn me at a certain age. I didn't mind it. But once you get in that age where you want to piss fast, dude. Yes. Because we had a time in our town. Everybody was pissing real fast.

Hmm.

and I remember like, it's just when kids are like, how fucking fast can you piss, you little f***git or whatever. Oh, yeah. And you're like, I'll piss fast. You gotta piss fast. And you're straining, but it hurts. It fucking hurts. But that's when I was, dude. Oh, I was wa- Yeah. I would wash a bottle of whiskey that was sitting on a- It's a power washer. Yeah, it was a-

You could clean off graffiti with your piss. Yeah, dude, I could definitely,

I could clean the rims on your car.

Fucking, that's, and there's money in that. There's money in that.

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it's ever been i do want to talk though that you guys do have um mystery boys podcast because do you feel like because you and i have both had a series of podcasts over the years do you still

have your own podcast yeah okay yeah this is the newest this is my newest podcast with the brilliant kurt metzger the mystery boys yeah he's on my prayer list i know that he's awesome and he's just man his brain just absorbs esoteric information yes he remembers like names of ancient grimoires that are hard to pronounce his knowledge of occult history is amazing it's like

it's just a brilliant dude oh dude his knowledge of sharzards from another realm is something we can't fathom i also one thing i love about kurt is i love his voice he has a great voice oh yeah it's fun to listen to it's this kind of futuristic but but ancient sort of hodgepodge of soundery

you know oh and he's like connected to some of the most interesting people the guests he's been getting we've had somebody who was on who who claims to be in a secret space program i think that's this week's episode no it's last it's a two-parter but this dude claims that in the military he was essentially inducted into this top secret program where i mean most people don't know this but the united states has been engaged in a kind of galactic war we're being run by reptilians gray aliens are essentially like it workers people don't realize that this one of the stories he told and what's so interesting about his stories are the details they take him into this office they're about to introduce him to this program he's passed an iq test apparently you have to have a very high iq to get into this program very high and it's not a normal like written iq test right they have some futuristic thing that just can tell if you're a dumb ass or not and he passes this they bring him into a office a gray alien waddles out no from what behind a curtain or a door a door like a little i guess a cat door or something like it

just comes an alien uses a door that's the part i don't get i wish i'd ask because he would have

an answer he would have a great answer for that i in my view it's like a cat door like maybe a mid-sized cat door okay he comes waddling out long fingers and he starts working on a dell computer he just they use him as it they he just starts unscrewing a dell computer i guess to put more memory in it or something and they were looking to see how he would react to the fact that a gray alien was working on a fucking computer and it's the story is amazing he gets in trouble bring it up can we show the episode just what it is yeah he uh he he got in trouble so he got in trouble because the first time he met a reptilian he poked the reptilian in the eye and reptilian see humans is essentially just like below snails like we are look that we're just hideous foul animals and to poke one of these things in the eye

means you are going to be tortured when you poke it in the eye did he say if it feels like an eye like as if you poked one of us in the eye or is it almost just like putting your finger into like a gelatin or like a water like a pool of water you're gonna have to come do we're gonna have

to have you on the show because that is the level of interviewing skills i don't have why didn't i ask what does a reptilian's eyeball feel like i didn't ask it's a i missed it they obviously have

because their eyes are just these fucking bird baths into another realm oh dude they're evil

they're fucked up the reptilians are really fucked up they tortured they took him yeah did he now did

he get tortured dude okay hold on dude i do want to hear but i also have to laugh because it always makes me laugh dude because here's the crazy thing and i'm gonna be right back to it we're going right back please reptile aliens they're fucking bullies Let's get started.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm so glad you're saying it out loud.

And nobody ever says it, dude. All they do, they take somebody away. They kind of put their knuckle in their butt or something or they're fucking like, you know, fuck them in the mouth. They're dirty.

Dude, I wouldn't be surprised if you were in the secret space program based on what you're saying. It's almost a direct account of how they torture you.

Did he say he knows what happened? Let me try to kill this fly, dude. Actually, maybe let's let science have its way.

let's see who it goes for yeah yeah let's see who it ends up let's see who it drains at the end it's

going to drain one of us this is a new game show at the end the fly there's a fly that's flying around whoever it doesn't like or whatever or whoever it does like really is the one who's blood it takes yeah let's see i think there's two that's a problem oh yeah they're probably a couple of guys it's probably ted lincoln and his buddy come on take the blood yeah they in some they use your yeah yeah sorry did they say what so did they say what happened did he say what happened And how did the torture go?

First of all, they didn't torture him on Earth. As it turns out, on the moon, there are these like government facilities where they are mining helium.

Oh, so they did it at their place or whatever?

They took, no, the US military, because the US military is in control of the reptilians. They transported him to a moon prison where-

This guy you interviewed?

Yeah, he was on a prison on the moon. And how did he get to the interview to send an uber what i don't know how they get them to the moon it's no how do you get to the your interview calling oh god yeah he called in from florida

he called him from florida dude which is basically our version of like be like that's our version of like alienism these days that's right it's a call in from florida

he called in from florida he's a he's a very sweet guy by the way really good storyteller and here's where it gets really weird so you know they're torturing you up there on the moon and but also as it turns out was he mexican guy sorry to interrupt you was a mexican guy i don't

know what this ethnicity it was a it was a call-in so i didn't get to see him why do you ask because all mexican dudes want to go to want to go to space you know they don't act like it none of them act like it but i got like a couple of close uh maximum friends they all want to go to space well don't you want to go to space yeah kind of not that much anymore like i don't know like i if i want to like if i'm going i'm going to leave i'm not going to go out there and come back i'm not gonna be some little bitch that's like i'll be back you're not gonna bezos you're

not gonna go up in a little fucking dick rocket and float around up there i don't think bezos

went up there did he i think did he go up there he just sent up like five or six people out that i think that i heard that he wants to smash or whatever dude and then brought him back down it was like one it's like someone of his little flying smash buckets yeah he's been he flew on

a suborbital suborbital i don't know if that counts man fuck no aboard the new shepherd rocket i want to go out of orbit i want to go toward like somewhere in between earth and the moon

dude you can hit suborbital just taking a direct flight up to calgary dude oh wait he did do it

10 minute flight crossed the car the carman line the recognized boundary of space and reached an apogee but you know bezos sending a bunch of hotties up in his rocket is the modern day equivalent of like driving ladies around in your corvette it's like what oligarchs do to get laid it's just like i'm gonna send you up to space yeah but yeah i you know that's true so the guy

who's been to space and was molested in a moon prison gets ubered over to you oh he's a call in

he was molested in a moon but you're right this is but how see i'm sorry it's not funny let me no well first of all whether or not it's funny or not i need to point out something theo i did not say he got molested in the moon prison you knew it why why do you know that were you in the gate program yes dude guys oh my god you weren't gifted and talented yes you know what that was

yeah it was easy to get into in our town okay but do you know what it was yes oh i've heard there's that there's possibilities that they were uh it was like a cia like a psyop not a

possibility like that is you can look that up that like no way are you serious dude you can look it up it was so like the idea was it kind of makes sense like if you're running a country who are the smart kids right you want to find out like this the super smart kids you create a program yeah that separates those kids from the rabble and then via that in that program you can start assessing them to see whether or not they'd be good to work in intelligence CIA covert programs or just like any like federal job and then you start grooming those kids you start and and where it gets like into the deep conspiracy stuff is you they were looking for kids

who had like, you know, telepathic ability. Oh, I thought nice legs or something you're going to say. So it wasn't like that. It wasn't like that. It wasn't like a pedophilic thing. So go ahead. They're looking for kids that have what?

Yeah, the secret, look. Telepathic ability? Because Gate and Gateway Public School operated by local school districts, blah, blah, blah, to provide military intelligence, the secret military unit focused on psychic espionage and remote viewing, often called the Stargate Project.

But what's that? That's not our thing. Yeah, it is. we were in military intelligence dude we weren't doing shit we read my side of the mountain well

right that's that's what you remember but do you remember the did you get the weird headphone test yeah what the fuck was that do you remember the weird shit they made you drink it kind of is true

dude they had this fucking headphone test we would take like once every quarter yeah what the fuck

was that what was that this what does that have to do with being gifted and talented testing your hearing what is that why they put that on us why they make us drink that weird pink shit what were they doing to us why do most people don't remember it as well as you do most people it's a foggy weird memory the whole thing was some kind of bizarre federal program you think that that's true look i look there's a now i mean this is one of the many like conspiracy theories that is not so much a conspiracy theory anymore that you could look it up you could see some of it is obviously speculation some of it's real so we don't know but yeah what were they doing they wanted to find kids who would be great assassins fuck dude and none of our kids made it then i didn't make it did you make it through did they kick you out of the gate program no i stayed in and wow it got a

little too homeworky for me at one point yeah yeah it was a lot it was a lot i wasn't a company man that's what it was at a certain point i think i wasn't a company got it so funny i have never thought about this in years dude but yeah we had to go off in this special building and learn out

there or whatever yeah they separate you they separate you and it was very strange i think i made it like two weeks before they kicked me out but yeah i just think they were like the test didn't work he's a fucking idiot like i don't i don't think it had anything to do with like

compliance or non-compliance you seem like they would have been you would have been their target

well i didn't make it i didn't make it in i didn't get to be in the secret space program and that's a good thing but yeah according to this guy there's brothels on the moon it'll change the way you look at the moon there's brothels the miners on the moon are geniuses like well who brought

the fucking miners up there fucking it's like a is it luck nick in them or whatever dude i don't

know i you know you don't want to get lost in the weeds when a dude is telling you about fucking on the moon yeah you're right because he was banging on the moon you're lying dude they have said he was fucking on the moon he was fucking on the moon like god they have brothels they for the like for in between getting tortured you get to go to the moon brothels it's the best it's the best hold on a second dude you gotta just listen to the episode like i'm not even doing it justice because there's so much more detail there's kind of a love story he kind of like fell in love with a nurse like it's kind of romantic and you know he talks about all these densities like the way they shift you to get to the moon is like like like the reptilians are on the fourth density we're on the third density aliens function like at a different vibrational frequency they have devices that shift your frequency and can reverse age you so i can see

that be impossible some of it i you just who knows well because you know what you start to see that frequency stuff you've seen that frequency when people put the sand on certain things in frequency cymatics it's called cymatics yes yes yeah bring up some cymatics if you can just so we can see what we're talking about cymatics if you haven't seen this it's basically they put sand and correct me if i'm wrong dungan they put sand on a paint on like a flat plane yeah and then they play music through it yep and the sand forms certain like kind of like snowflakes

or text like figures or textures or designs that's right predictable uh geometries from various frequencies they it produces these like interesting um patterns that sometimes kind of look like crop circles and that's ketamine on that plate is it really it works way better with i would always do this before i snorted ketamine and put it on a cymatic plate set it to yep 47

dude what if you crunched up a bunch of fritos on there it would work it'd probably be like you're fat you'll die young into a scale yeah yeah but this is real stuff so this is four to two yeah so these are the hertz different hertz they put through and if you've never seen this it's unbelievable that so this makes me think that we could just like this some way that if you put a different frequency through us you could then transfer us from one place to another because you could shape us in a different way to be able to be transported exactly and you know what is

When I think of this shit I just think of like oh right like when people get into conspiracy theories and stuff inevitably there's like this hierarchy where there's someone controlling someone else who's controlling someone else and it's like it's it's reptiles all the way down like where does it stop like who's like ultimately in control but i think of cymatics where it's like well maybe maybe like the way things keep repeating throughout history and sort of the same way because there's these various frequencies that exist on planet earth there's frequencies that create power dynamics that create authoritarianism tyranny fascism like cruelty war and you can tune into that frequency and the more you tune into that frequency the more you like your your your shape changes why would that not

be dude that's such a that's cymatics the study of visible sound and vibration demonstrating how acoustic frequencies organize physical matter in a geometric pattern because the human body is largely water sound waves travel rapidly through us making it possible to use frequency and vibration for various wellness therapeutic and clinical applications yeah dude this is one of the most unbelievable things that i've really i think that i've thought about in a while because if you see that do that to that sand right yeah and if you know yeah what if you put a frequency on that's like i'm gonna feel this way or this is the frequency that's tuned into this almost like a new radio station for yourself like instead of tuning into like no frequency where i'm just at the whims of the fucking at the uh byproduct and like exhaust of corporate you the corporate universe we live in i'm just wandering through that frequency all day what if i spent time tapping into a frequency that actually brought me some peace or frequency that brought like it made me exude like love or possibility or um hope or power or protection yeah that well i mean

this is a choice you know you're sitting on the toilet taking a shit looking at whatever the algorithm's feeding you you'll notice that i'll throw the shit out the window hopefully it hits

someone so it i well you can aim right but also so it hits someone and boosts their spirits i know

but what i'm saying is you don't have to just randomly throw it you can aim you can slingshot

it but go on so you're sitting on the toilet going well i'm you're ever all of us are like staring

into these hypno rectangles right the algorithm at least my algorithm oh my god it's fucked up it's just showing me like horrible things or people in the midst of psychotic episodes or people in the forest drinking their period blood or you know just a it's wild chaos and it's

witchcraft new beverages yeah but it's crazy dude you'll go from like it is crazy dude you're right there's they're definitely scrambling our brains and they're we're starting to like with the things you see because you'll see like uh genocidal killings of children right children looking kid looking for his mother for 70 days yes finally finds landmine in palestine you know like a landmine wearing his mother's dress yeah and they kill the child or whatever horrible you'll see that but then immediately it's like 40 off these asics you know and you're like that's right that's right but it starts to confuse your brain because your brain it takes the depth of one that's so deep and one that means nothing really at all you got it and then it puts them kind of all in

the same plane you're you better watch out because you just articulated something that i've learned from metzger which is really like it's it's for me like it's believe it or not i'm kind of skeptical about stuff but this one like it's hard for me to dispute so he he says that uh assassinations public assassinations create trauma cultural trauma charlie kirk did you notice the charlie kirk assassination everyone saw yes before they shut it down all of us had to watch that shit happen right so this produces trauma the trauma response opens you up to conditioning it's the same shit kidnappers use it's the same shit people who torture you use they freak you the fuck out so that you kind of disassociate. You don't want to be there. You go into a kind of sad, foggy place. And then in that place, they show you the Asics commercial. In that place, they give you some propaganda. In that place, they give you a solution so this will never happen again. This is a known technique for mind controlling people. So anytime there's assassinations, it's not just like power dynamic shift, it's cultural dynamic shift because they inject that moment with however they want to shift the the tide right so wow so instagram is or any social media is kind of doing this but like low level right so you look you you know suddenly you're micro dosing it yeah exactly opening like freaking you out and then what do you know you're and then where it gets really creepy is the commercial you're getting isn't just from the algorithm it's because your phone heard you Thank you.

talking about wanting to like what's the best fishing rod to catch catfish yeah and then so right after you watch a furry eat a hot dog with a human turd in it yeah and you're like what what's happened in the world like a an ad for like fishing rods comes up you're like oh cool

i should get that fishing rod and dude speaking hot dogs dude footlong hot dogs that should count as white people eating footlong hot dogs should count as reparations dude i think oh my god disaster i'm just saying like disaster at a baseball game whatever having to eat them in public dude it's so fucking scary it's crazy that that's that's accepted that that's not studied yeah and that's the kind of thing that they're getting us to do it's like these little they're and they're sitting in a fucking like globe like they're sitting in a snow globe on the moon at a you know outside of a brothel on the moon that they own you know probably just like uh de-scaling their skin with their like reptilian brush you got and then they're watching us eat like just like streaming like countless hours of us eating foot long uh hot dogs you know and like got it and then they say then they hit you with the reparations thing you know like will you sign

for reparations you know it's like yeah whatever it is it's like you know it's but the reality of it is you're you know a vampire only goes where they're invited that's a vampire rule for some reason never understood it but a vampire only goes so if a vampire comes to your door they'll always ask like can i come in and if you say no they won't come in i don't get it but that's vampire mythology so your phone is the fucking vampire and you're inviting it in every time you stare at it you're saying please contaminate me with a combination state propaganda propaganda from other countries corporate propaganda and like just weird shit like you're invite we're all inviting this in you all you got to do is stop which i can't it's hard it's hard it's almost

impossible you can do i think there's ways to do better the ways that i've found that help me are one some meditation helps i do meditation every day now it's not a ton 10 minutes but it helps some days i'll get in two sessions but it's not a ton but it gives me a little bit more space sometimes like i don't need that it'd be times like let me look at my phone right now i don't need that and then the other thing i think is different types of plant medicine can help you can help give a little bit that more you to connect you back to nature those are the two

that i know well but it's too much man i think 10 minutes of meditation a day is actually pretty admirable man a lot of people can't do that that's you shouldn't beat yourself up about that i mean like how long were you told to meditate i don't know i just feel like the good people do it for

such a long time 20 minutes maybe like yeah that like 20 minutes seems good um but they did have those monks who were those don't monks meditate yeah man yeah well dude but then they found those monks with meth or whatever can you look that up what those meth monks oh yeah there were were

they smuggling dope no what was it a third of monks at a temple in thailand that's gotta be

hard to meditate a third of the buddhist monks at a temple in northern thailand have tested positive for meth six out of 18 monks at what problem in pijit's province were disrobed after failing surprise drug tests during a police raid on monday officers also found meth pills a homemade gun and

what the fuck what a gun that's good oh my god a gun dude a gun is the total opposite of being a monk that is a crazy temple and that is i just do you think a meth would help you meditate a meth would help you meditate no you would be like dude you would be doing all all the prayers like as fast as you could it'd be like our father who art in heaven i don't think those monks are doing the lord's prayer but that's what i think they're probably in a crazy contest online to do the lord's prayer as fast as they can that's 11 seconds yeah bro new record fuck you dude that's what they're doing that's how but dude that's how distracted we've gotten monks are doing math yes and they're having contests to read the lord's prayer as fast as they can probably i mean and they had a gun the guy had a gun you're paranoid you're fucking paranoid you're on meth it's the next step you get a gun dude maybe you have a copy of the chantaram under your pillow maybe maybe

that's the most risque thing you're supposed to have as a monk yeah dude that's wild that's just it just was i guess that's what's happening right now man people are people are fucking snorting meth in temples they disrobed them i know which is wild but i bet you're hot if you're all methed out i bet you want your robe off you're done you're not really a monk yeah dude my buddy was

a month for like almost i think

six months what kind of monk um i'm not sure it was an organ what color were his robes i think his robes is just orange kind of probably a buddhist monk yeah yeah buddhist monk and he said that they would sit around and this is kind of crazy but he said sometimes they would sit around and draw hair on each other because they all had their head shaved and they would sit around for fun and draw and draw hair on each other and it was kind of like the key like kind of the low-key like you know or whatever like kind of a sweet thing that i heard you know it's

weird i don't know man i don't want it that creeps me out bro the other guys are doing methamphetamines i don't know what it's worse they were probably drawing hair on each other too

there should be a contest to see how fast can someone say the lord's prayer dude you want to do a you think you could do it do you know it yeah i know it okay then let's try you go first all right zach will you time us

so you can tell me when it started yeah how does it work uh i'm gonna count you down ready three two one our father art in heaven i will be thy name thy kingdom come thy will be done on earth this is heaven give us this day our daily bread and forgets our trust us review those who trust us against us and lead us not in temptation but deliver us from evil for thine is the kingdom the power of the glory forever and ever amen that was good but i kind of slurred 9.8

Under 10's great dude Especially this time of year Alright

You mean the summer heat

Let me think Alright Do me 3, 2, 1 Our Father who art in heaven And I will be out of the name Of the kingdom come And I will have been on earth Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread

Give us a day of our daily bread

Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread Give us a day of our daily bread our trespasses. As we forgive those who trespass against us. Let me try one more time.

Three, two, one.

Yeah. What did it start again? Sorry. Our Father. Okay, our Father. Let's call our Father. Okay, because we only had to step that. Go on.

Three, two, one.

Our Father, we are in heaven, hallowed be our name of the kingdom come, and we will be on earth as we do. Give us the daily bread and forgive us the daily bread and forgive those who trespass against us. No.

That's the devil getting in you there, making you stutter. That's the mosquitoes. That's the Texas devil flies. It's got your tongue.

That's that tongue-berculosis, boy. Yeah, it's right.

You got the consumption, spiritual consumption. You got to let the Holy Spirit flow through you, Theo.

Hey, pretty lady, won't you give her a sign? I give anything to make you my own mind.

Praise God! Praise God!

You know that Mountain Dew. You know it. It makes me think about summertime. that hot part of the calendar you know how it works you know when the calendar just gets hot it gets so hot sometimes i'll call the government i'll say this turn can you turn it down we can't handle it it would get so hot and then you'd have to open up the windows and but then the hot would come in you know and then you but they get so hot inside you have to open up the doors and in the hot would go out and in and out it was just a lot of hot thankfully i had me some mountain dew just a refreshing it was like the heavens cut the faucet on and i could just enjoy myself just just doing just doing myself with that Mountain Dew I liked it if I had me a can of two of Mountain Dew I'd go out I'd pet every dog in town that's how I I just became like that neighborly American you know that's how I became I'd be shaking the hands of local raccoons and politicians and all of them, you know. I'd watch the wind go by, maybe whistle at it, let it know I had a way of making my own little breeze right there. Something about that summertime and just having a little bit of Mountain Dew in you. Maybe you would just want to get out there and just kiss a bald eagle, you know. And sometimes you'd settle for your grandmother or whatever, you know, a little kiss on the cheek, whatever, you know. Pop-pop didn't mind. What I'm saying is this. Mountain Dew, it's just, it's an alternative to the heat, but it's also part of, it's part of summer. But, dude, you win, first of all, and congratulations. Thank you so much. 9.8 seconds, that was really good. Yeah, actually, I can't believe, you know, that's wild. For our father, under 10 seconds? I think it's good and I would love to see other people if they want to challenge Junkin on that

me there's going to be critiques too there's different ways to say it depending on what denomination you are i think that was what i learned as an episcopalian but i think there's my wife's catholic i think they say they parts of it are different but i don't know if that's

going to add or subtract seconds dude my girl catholic but that baptist you feel me let's go i'm just making up i don't have a girl but if i did you don't have a girl no but she'd be cute

if I did wow it must be tough to find a girlfriend for you huh just a handsome dude with a super

successful podcast one day I'm gonna get one I mean famous comedian I think you know what there is like an age where I think it gets a little bit weird and then what do you mean maybe I'm just you know what I think some of the stories I tell in my head I gotta change a little bit yes dude there's and you know what's funny I never said that I've never said that before you've never said that come on there's a book not really no but the ones I'm telling myself because I don't even realize they're being told they've just been written on this wall like these old like this is the way it is or whatever it's like dude i'm gonna find somebody great of course it takes time everything in my life is taking time and yeah um i don't want to get somebody that's just like um you know like i want to have some fun but at the same time like yeah i want i want somebody that's going to be a as perfect a fit as i can get dude if there's this book and it sounds like

bullshit and i actually got the book because i was watching that documentary on nexium you know nexium cult keith raniere you know about that yeah we had a guy on here from nexium didn't we

oh no we had a guy who got bit by a dog at a nexium event what i'm not even joking who was that guy that sucks he was fine he was like at a cult event and a dog bit and he got bit by a dog but that's how he got involved with the cult whoa oh that was it oh no michael was mom no not him that's out yeah oh he was talking about alice mack's sex cult yeah there was another guy who'd been uh cured of oh he got cured by of um ocd yeah cured or not um cured by nivexum yeah cured by nivexum mark elliot yeah bro look at me right there i was young it's ai you look younger now well i'm older now but also not if i'm definitely older if i keep telling myself that. I'm a fucking boss. I'm a fucking nine-year-old, you little f***er. Mark Elliott, I'm former motivational speaker and loyal follower of Keith Renier and his organization of Ex-Im, a purported self-improvement company. I believe he got bit by a dog. I could be wrong, but I thought the dog something happened. He got cured. He was diagnosed with Hirschsprung's disease. A rare intestinal disease at birth. Elliott was returning home from a camp via Greyhound bus when he repeatedly shouted an anti-black racial slur at black passengers that's called riding greyhound first of all uh at the and i think some of that comes with the price of your ticket i believe also okay i rode g hound for a long time shout out hound uh well oh because he had tourettes though that's why did he ever cure it did they

say he claims they cured it he cured it it's in the documentary like it shows people being like

um it did not cure my tourettes in any way oh well then why did we have him on the podcast he

said he did in the documentary that i saw it was well i mean it was claiming that they cured it

oh well so maybe it says it didn't he it didn't cure his Tourette's but i thought i can't remember exactly what happened in the episode it was just like seven years ago on the documentary i saw it

was you know some people it seemed like it was helping but i heard about this book on this documentary i was fascinated by this raniere guy because it's like you see him and he doesn't really seem like somebody who would successfully start a sex cult bringing him up you know what i mean no judgment or anything but it wouldn't be like the first person i would guess you look at like put put pull up a picture of like young charles manson right and keith ranieri manson you look at and you're like okay there he is right this dude was getting ladies to brand his name into their fucking bodies no way yes yes now now you look at him and you wouldn't guess that but pull up like a picture of manson that's a montana young manson ring young manson or not that young but you know that manson i could see you look at him like yeah i could see you starting some kind of sex cult i could see your members cutting swastikas into their foreheads but this dude looks like like somebody your mom dates before she marries your stepdad but this

dude does look like he has a dark side to him dude oh yeah this is just all based off of one photo but that guy looks like yeah yeah he dates your mom you think he's nice he comes in the house and says cool stuff yeah but he doesn't come through with kind of his promises and then you see him yelling at your mom outside of the apartment window yeah man yeah that's that fucking dude that's what it is keith rainier could we get him on here he's in jail he is maybe you could call him from jail dude jail that's the most sex trafficking you could ever do it's Bumper to bum.

offer in there dude no he in this guy he like it's the documentary is incredible and you know obviously like it's horrible like doing this shit's horrible but when you when you just watch it in terms of like whoa like the ambition like oh my god how did you pull that off and so they mentioned this book psycho cybernetics which sounds like horseshit yeah the name sounds stupid But I got this book and started listening to it, and it's this plastic surgeon wrote the book, and he noticed that you would give plastic surgery to people and their personalities would change, fix their nose, and they would turn into these different people. And so his premise is that there's sort of an internal visual image of yourself inside of you. And so basically, like, if you look at what you think about throughout the day, and a lot of people worry, ruminate. They're constantly bringing up things they're afraid of in the future or shit they wish they didn't do in the past. And this is what's creating the you. it's you you're habitually running through a rolodex of bad memories and internal fears and stuff and so he's saying that what's really cool about that is it shows you how disciplined you are you think you have no control over that but you do it's just habit and so what he says is all there's a lot of techniques in there but one of them is what happens if you and you start habituating yourself to remembering good moments in your life instead of bad moments in your life and it sounds so obvious but when you every time you find yourself getting freaked out over that fucking memory the thing what you're worried about the thing you replace it and he said and he says it doesn't have to be a big thing like winning a marathon he's like he uses the example of when

you learn to tie your shoes yeah you know some just when somebody smiled at you yes when you

smiled at someone yeah that that's enough and you start replacing this habitual rumination with good memories even if they're from the distant past it doesn't matter all of a sudden your life starts changing because your your inner identity will begin to conform to it'll begin to lead your outer identity that's right yeah you start making different choices all the stuff changes in your life so he his point is you don't really need to get plastic surgery he was he was saying that some people get a scar on their face and it makes them more powerful like he was uh i think that the nazis in the fencing nazis if you got a scar on your face it means you were like a a great fencer yeah it's so but some people get a scar on their face ruins their life right you know so obviously what's going on there is not the external appearance wow it's how your brain it's how

you're wearing it you got it dang and i wonder if what if we all just don't even i've long thought this what if we all don't realize there's so much more capability that we have that we just don't know i believe that that's such a truth like what if you could think your way into looking somehow different like that's almost that's almost it's interesting for a plastic surgeon to say that because it's like yeah what if people could think or believe themselves yeah into actually that you're that you would then visually somehow look different like i know it probably would be tough to really unstructure your like it wouldn't skeletally that would be probably impossible but on a but on a different type of level or could your skeleton morph over time it's interesting to think that wow if i had enough of belief or if i yeah if i pervade this type of energy yeah or i just envisioned it enough that i would actually become the thing that i envisioned well pull up

pull up like an early picture of marilyn monroe before she got famous i go visit her grave

sometimes you really do is she in nashville she lives or she's she dies she dies i guess she lives in a coffin around the corner from where i live lives in a coffin in westwood i mean craziest way to say dead yeah she's deceased she's living in a coffin now yeah but she's yeah

so that's her yeah so that's marilyn monroe oh bro yeah yeah now we'll say this she's an

attractive young lady she's not the marilyn monroe that we envision still beautiful that's you sure

that's her yeah like find some other like early pictures of marilyn monroe before she was famous i don't know how you find that because like a lot of these are like modeling pictures but when you look at them it's like there you go and like you know obviously you could say i'd suck her feet still but you could say that that this

This was, you know, lighting, makeup, and stuff like that. But there's a story I heard. I don't know if it's true or not. Marilyn Rowe is at a diner. She's with one of her, like, I think, childhood friends. And, like, you know, no one even knows it's Marilyn Rowe. And Marilyn Rowe says to her friend, do you want to see what happens when I become her? And her friend's like, yeah. And so all of a sudden, she does something and turns, like, essentially shapeshifts. like she embodies maryl monroe and everyone in the cafe starts looking at her like oh my god that's maryl monroe so this is what this dude is talking about that and you know how many times have you been with a person who maybe isn't like classically beautiful but their personality yeah is so amazing that you you start falling in love with you realize the physical appearance it's nothing compared to this spirit inside of them and the coverse sadly happens where you're around a beautiful person and you realize oh my god oh this is a monster and it's so fascinating it's just the shell it's it's like a lampshade or something it's like what kind of light is

shining through dude that's a great way to say that man it's like a lampshade there it is the Marilyn Monroe shapeshifter story refers to a famous anecdote where she could alter her appearance simply by changing her posture and energy when walking down a busy street unnoticed as Norma Jean, she would turn to a companion and ask, do you want to see her? And instantly transform into the iconic Marilyn. People who were with Marilyn during these moments, such as her friend Eli Wallach or the actress Susan Strasberg, noted that she changed nothing about her clothes or makeup. Instead, the transformation was a masterclass in embodiment. Wow.

It's wild. That stuff is wild that you could do that.

But it is interesting, yeah, how I feel. What do I carry? What am I going to take outside with me today? What am I going to take inside with me today? And I applaud parents because I know their lives get so busy and the time that they have to even take for themselves and the time that one of them is like, hey, will you keep watch for a little bit while I just go meditate for 10 minutes or brush my teeth or pat myself on the back or cry in the bathroom.

Yeah, it gets wild.

I think that's a real war. It's a real tandem. it's a real if it's working well i bet it's a real tandem thing and sometimes it's painful and sometimes it's beautiful and sometimes it's probably a lot of things but i applaud that the amount of time parents has has to be like oh my god well you know but the thing is um and

you're right and you're totally right the amount of free time i have now compared to the free time i used to have like i could spend days days alone in my house blasting rails academy completely happily alone playing video games yeah alone and i would get bummed out if i had something to do like two days two days away i'd be stressed out yeah but but bro that's when you know you're going to be doing some drugs oh yeah man and and but now um i have i have no very what what people would call free time yeah but what is free time the real question is like that the example that i've been taught in buddhism is we all have a version a place where this is where i'm going to feel all right and for like a lot of people maybe not touring stand-up comics but for a lot of people that could be a hotel room a nice hotel room you can order room service the tv the soft bed no disturbances phone is off now i will relax so this creates a terrible tension between every other moment like everyone has their place what that the place or everything this is where i'm going to be it's for some people it's just coming home after a hard day's work sit on the couch whatever it is for some people everyone has their little oasis in their mind this is the place yeah but the idea is this is an illusion the oasis is an illusion you go into that place the place isn't giving you relaxation the place isn't giving you peace you're deciding this is where i will be at peace theoretically you could do that through the whole fucking day your whole day could theoretically become that place that you're hoping to get to when you have enough money when you finally get a vacation when you finally get some a moment to yourself and this is what i have read is one of the definitions of enlightenment enlightenment this is a definition i heard um because it's even defining it is difficult and who the fuck knows but the idea is what if every Every place you were at was free time, even though it was filled up with all kinds of activity, even though there were things you had to do.

What if you were maintaining this sense of like, yeah, this is where I belong. This is good. This is the vacation. And this is in the Third Patriarch of Zen. He wrote this great book.

And who doesn't he learn this?

Yeah. The first line. And I wish I could. The name is like, I think, Japanese. Can you look up the Third Patriarch of Zen? And yeah, that's it. and he wrote the great way is not difficult for those who have no preferences your preferences are tormenting your ass you want to be there you don't want to be here you want to be somewhere else and when you're a parent your preferences will destroy you wow because you obviously there's moments that i just want to play diablo 4 dude i just want to sit on the fucking couch and play Diablo 4, I just want to be alone I don't want to be around anybody for a second That's a preference And the more you cling to that

The more you'll suffer The part of the soul That burns in hell Is the part that clings to life

That Meister Eckhart, but dude Dude, I think about that stuff a lot Dude, with like Sometimes with like reliving old parts of my past Or old stories, or just like Old things that happen It's like, how long do I want to think i have to figure this out before i just want to set up some barricades for myself now that's like hey we're not going to go try to figure that out anymore we're just going to move on right and we're going to move on and we're going to put boundaries in place so that when this thing or the or certain types of people or this energy comes around that this is how we're going to behave towards it yeah and we're not going to be like mean to it but this is how we're going to operate now instead of like i get stuck in this place of like well i'll figure this out or a little more therapy and this and that and the therapy and stuff it's all good right it's all helpful it's all like puts a magnifying glass on things that are cool but um but to at some point be like you know this path it's a lot i don't know i've been on this this path for a while let me try to do something else let me try to move forward let me try to not even let this be up like let let let me really let this be part of the past yeah instead of going back to the past to solve something like that's the thing sometimes i keep going back to the past to solve the present where it's like let me try and do this maybe a little bit different and um so i've just been thinking about that recently um thanks so much for some of the chats dude i want to find out what's what's a rabbit hole or like something that you guys have learned um on mystery on mystery boys um but i just want to get this update the guest mark elliott clarifies that he does not claim to have been cured of tourette syndrome instead he describes his experience as a journey where he found a way to master the condition noting that while the symptoms have drastically reduced he still feels the urge occasionally and works to change his relationship with it that's interesting yeah write it down that's what i do dude write it down um with mystery boys what is a rabbit hole kind of that you or something new that you guys have like latched on to that's been like really interesting to go down that you and metzger have uh have i gotta give full credit

to Metzger for most of the rabbit holes. Like, I'm telling you, this guy he, like, it's

Do you think he's good or evil when you think about him?

He's good. Okay. Very good. This is a pop quiz, man. Why? Do you think he's evil?

No, I don't. I was asking you. He actually texted me and told me to ask you that. Are you kidding me? No, I'm not kidding you at all. So it's just a

good... Oh, he's the sweetest...

I know him. I've already decided how I feel about him. He's good.

Really good. Okay. I wouldn't do a fucking podcast with an evil person. Why would you do that to yourself? That's horrible.

Dude, do you ever think, what if one day you got home years from now and you started to notice something like your skin around your chin or something, and you started peeling it, and then you took it off, and what if we were the aliens, dude?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Like this whole time, we've been trying to hunt the aliens, and then you peel, you're like, what is that? Dude. You think it's acne, and it's just fucking abracadabra. You're an alien.

Oh, my God. and then you peel the alien mask off and you're human. Yeah, and you're a cool black guy. So what the fuck are you, man? Yeah. What are you? Turn it up.

Yeah. You know. Spin that shit. How about this, dude?

I'll give you a quick one.

Yeah, take me down, but I want to go down a rabbit hole. Okay. And that was, and no, Kurt didn't ask that either. I was just joking around, dude.

He's far from evil. But Metzger did give me a little bit of trivia, which I'd never heard before, which is the most batshit thing ever. So, John Wayne Gacy, the famous serial killer.

From Illinois, yeah.

Horrible motherfucker, the clown. Yeah, pedophile. John Wayne Gacy.

pedophile fucking clown just horrible human being he lazy too lazy killed people put him under his house oh yeah he said that if he was guilty of anything it was running a funeral home without a license because he had rotting child corpses under his fucking house also weirdly political and um so John Wayne Gacy was executed on a solar eclipse which is already weird like what you know you know there's gonna be eclipse that day right why are you executing one of the most notorious serial killers like on the day that like in a horror movie that's how you get a zombie a Freddy Krueger that's how you get a demon or something execute the person it's a solar eclipse they come back to life or they haunt your dreams so that's just weird by itself but coincidentally Jeffrey Dahmer was baptized and I'm not sure into what denomination of Christianity on the same day another fucking serial killer baptized while during the execution

of like so so so a spiritual realm is open yes and a uh and a calendar a seasonal a what realm would that be what do you mean like the the the spiritual realm is open with the baptism like

there's a spiritual right like embodiment happening and in eclipses just so like in the west we think they're cool everyone goes out you get your eclipse glasses everyone goes out to look they are fucking cool i've been there they're amazing it's amazing to witness the temperature drops shadows get weird but like you know one of my friends who's like a shivite for real like who like you know hindu follower of shiva um you know he was explaining to me like in india eclipses are not something you want to go out under like it's it's represents an opening where a lot of weird shit can come into this realm so you know his advice is don't um don't go outside during an eclipse like it's you don't understand the energies that are out there this is a one this is in their cosmology so it's a very powerful even if you're not into the woo stuff it's a very crazy thing that happens and and it birds stop singing you know they think it's nighttime all of a sudden. It's just a very deep spiritual moment. So why? Why do you execute this monster during an eclipse? And why do you baptize another monster during the eclipse? And why on the same day? And how is that accidental? And maybe that's cymatics. I don't know. Maybe that's just part of of like the weird secret gears in the universe we don't know about. But to me, it's very fascinating when moments like that emerge.

Right, when the curtains are open a little bit into the ethereal, into the next realm, when somebody's spiritually, when there's an anointment and an embodiment, blessing somebody with the embodiment of God, like bringing God into their heart. Right, right. That's risky behavior, dude. Yeah, I wonder if, do you know if, it's kind of weird that we get people to go outside and look up into the eclipse then.

Yeah.

Was that always a practice? Or did people used to not stare into the eclipse?

Oh, no, dude. People went blind for sure. There's a famous-

People went blind just because they were eight years old back in the day, you know what I'm saying?

Well, yeah, you would just go blind from drinking water. Yeah.

i mean dude imagine how scary dude everything was a game show like 200 years ago dude a cup of water you could get undehydrated or tuberculosis what do you want explosive diarrhea yeah you want

to die of thirst or die of dysentery pick one or the other one or the other no people have not

always looked at eclipses historically witnessing an eclipse was often met with fear awe or strict avoidance rather than direct observation because ancient civilizations lacked scientific explanations many cultures considered the darkening of the sun to be a bad omen or a disruption of the natural order that makes sense for sure many cultures believed a celestial creature was attempting to devour the sun the norse blamed sky wolves the chinese told tales of a celestial dragon and aztecs believed the jaguar was eating the sun people would often bang pots scream or shoot arrows into the air to frighten the monster away and it worked yeah but it is when did we start and when when did we start seeing eclipses and going and watching forever but did when did we did it become a practice like was there something that happened like it was a big thing on television like go see the eclipse or whatever it was always

significant i mean it's just like no matter what period in human history like can you fucking imagine like not knowing what was going on why but how much fun would we have had back then first of

all you get to make up what's going on right or you just get to believe what's happening like you get to believe what's happening but i just think the imagine imagine everybody's imagination back then yeah and everybody's like storytelling like you had to have a piece of information to even you had to like life was probably scary you had to seem viable you had to fight for your existence probably well i mean this is what i think is interesting like you valued your life more because you're fucking your sibling was dying at home it was like let let let this day mean let this day mean something to me let this information that i'm reading to let it let the fact that i can absorb information let it mean something to me right you you're saying that now maybe we've

lost that that people have become sort of numb nihilistic husks who don't value their own existence like they did when you watched your friend get eaten by a wolf right i think it's a

tough i think we're we are deeper in it than we know i think we are up to our waist right now in in what in um in the suction of of of the devil oh right in the suction of something deviant in the suction of the dark arts man i believe that it is we think we just have nice pants on but we don't realize that we've invited these skins of like you know we've invited something there's something very demonic going on do you think technology is inherently demonic oh my god i

mean you it okay so first like let's define demonic okay so what is your definition of demonic

uh with intent to harm to let me see demonic i would say of satan's will yeah with intent to be a succubus to the godliness that to the uh nature and morality and godliness that may that that exists inside of us as a group and as individuals okay so does that make sense or not

did you have bishop robert baron on your show no cool guy god have him on brb yes damn dude

you guys crazy though you guys the initials to have yeah he's he's really cool he was he was a

sign him up all right zach i i had him on my podcast and uh what's really interesting is actually having on my podcast got me more interested in christianity than any other any other time in my life and the reason was not necessarily what he told me though what you know he's a really cool guy and like obviously he's like brilliant he's a bishop and he's obviously

a theologian and he's orthodox greek orthodox he's catholic okay i don't yeah so but what was

really weird is you know i've had so many guests of all kinds of i've had satanists on the podcast i've had witches on the podcast i've had hindus buddhists new age people lsd chemists i've had all kinds of you know generally wiggas god's dalmatians never and you haven't not yet bro

that's a road to go down that's the eclipse dude that's the eclipse no i probably have i have to go

back and look at the catalog that's that's a human eclipse but dude i get i have one catholic bishop on and man people got so mad at me and it was really interesting because it's like wait a minute what the fuck like you guys didn't care when i had like people who were you trying to demonize to god why they get mad well because like the basically what started uh bubbling up was that i i moved to texas i'm having a bunch of fucking kids i've become some kind of fundamentalist christian all this like i love religion and i i love christianity i love like i i'm fascinated by it and the new testament is so beautiful and so different from what most people think it is like when you sit down and actually read it yourself if you have an idea of what christianity is you realize whatever that was is not what this is which is to me a really sort of thrilling moment and studying any religion like if you're if you're going to critique a religion or a philosophy you really i think need to study it deeply amen and then you can then go for it right we got to start

doing that more i think on here is learning about some of the depths of different religions because you see a lot of stuff online that can lead you in certain ways um but demons yeah satan satan and demons i believe that satan is way more active than we think I think we got into this lush period of self believing that something was taking care of us. Not that something doesn't love us, I believe that, but we believe that something was taking care of us that we didn't have to show up for our own salvation, not just religiously, but for our own salvation as human beings as well, for our own day-to-day salvation. Do you think that we are strong enough or care enough to save ourselves?

Well, I mean, I hear what you're saying, and that's a really good question, because I think you're pointing towards a misconception, or in Buddhism what would be considered a distortion when it comes to what people think they are. So in Buddhism, this shows up as something called interdependency or dependent co-origination, which means that we're all connected, that the clothes that you're wearing, everything that you are, everything around you, everything is there because of causes and conditions that created the situation that we're in. And so, in other words, when you ask, are we enough to save ourselves, it points to a distortion, which is we think we are an individual self disconnected from the system.

Right.

And of course, we're not enough to save ourselves. And I don't just mean in a spiritual sense. I mean, everything that we consider that we need for survival around us right now is there because of the labor and work and energy of people you're never going to meet. the food was hauled in on trucks, the plastic in the Fiji bottle, your clothes, everything, your books, the trees that grew to make the wood for your son, all of these things point to a complete tapestry of existence, meaning there isn't such a self anyway. But if you think that you're a self, then if you're foolish enough to think you're all you need, it's like, look around

you right but no but i mean i agree but do you think we as a do you think we are strong enough to show up and save ourselves you mean as a species as a species because i feel like we're kind of on the brink of this place where something could happen or like we're this like like they're like i don't know it seems like darkness is trying to defeat us oh yeah and and it feels like are we strong enough to save ourselves because some days it feels like maybe In some days, it feels like maybe not, if I'm real honest.

Well, I don't think. I think that the—I think a lot of people's suffering is related to self-cherishing. A lot of people's suffering is related to being misdirected. There is a misdirected force in the universe. Now, Bishop Barron, he was telling me, well, what is the definition of Satan? What is the actual definition of Satan? What is it described as? And he said, it is the accuser, the scatterer, that which scatters. So if we're going to come up with a definition of the demonic, and the question is, is this technology, demonic, and let's just throw the word Satan out for a second, because that does create a knee-jerk reaction in people. A lot of people do have religious trauma, for real, and I know that word gets thrown around a lot but some people are born into highly abusive households where religion is used as an excuse to fuck with the rational mind or people it's not when right i'm being a little bit flippant about it no i don't think you're being flippant i think you're i'm just i'm but you're just clarifying i'm yeah but but so for some people it's useful to throw out words like that and just you don't have to use that word if you i think it's a useful word but um i could mean the devil the dark energy whatever you want to you know but satan does have like some specific definitions the scatterer and the accuser that's exactly what's going on what is technology doing it's accusing one group or another group of being the source of all the suffering in the world the accuser i've seen you theo accused of you know because of the people you have in your podcast it's all your fucking fault dude look what you've done right but it's not just you it's not just you it's what what what technology is doing what the algorithm seems to be doing is creating these very clear distorted distinctions between groups of people right which is anytime you have direct one-on-one contact with most people they're awesome they might be annoying they might disagree with you might be chatty or whatever chatty but in general they all they're good people want to help yeah people actually really want to help it's very sweet but i agree you get behind these phones and it's like

i mean there's so much racial like i have like black friends that'll just be like they act like they were slaves sometimes because of the fodder they get fed they'll get stuff like remember when you were a slave and it's like yeah and i'm like dude ronnie what are you talking about i'm like your dad worked at chase bank dude yeah when were you a fucking slave you were the best player on our team dude you got all the girls you got all the white girls too yeah well look at all the stories look at all the stories remember when you were a slave choose some of this slave gum and it'll sell you slave it'll be like oh remember this richmond virginia gum you know now it's

tastes like the 1870s you know dude they're trying to replace you yeah if you're white they're trying to replace you better watch out you're gonna be replaced or but there's some groups that never get pointed at well what i'm saying is if you look at the emergent religion like you could call the the culture war stuff i think you could actually identify this as a kind of religion or a larp even it's it's people are larping because the first thing that's happening is you're being invited to take a side you know if you're uh if you're a black person okay you you need to be on the side of what like if you want to get slave gum or whatever if you're gay now you need to join the lgb you're part of this movement right if you're white you're being replaced if you're jewish they're gonna the concentration camps are about to start up again you can look and see that every single person on the planet if you want to attach to a terrifying horrible story you can find it and the moment you subscribe to it you invite it in your algorithm will be flooded with things to confirm your worst fears giving you a sense that this is real crystallizing the distortion this this is all happening in 2d space on your fucking phone yeah mostly i'm not saying that there isn't obviously real evil happening in the world right now, but this moment right now, wherever you may be, this moment right now, it's pretty good. This is the kingdom of God. This is what I think Jesus was talking about. The kingdom of God is here right now. This is why the symbol of blindness appears again and again. Saul of Tarsus, Saul of Tarsus, stoning fucking Christians, which to this day is very popular. You know, they're one of the most persecuted, it's one of the most persecuted religions to this day. And people get mad at me for saying that, but you can look it up, dude.

Oh, who, Christianity? Yes. Oh, for sure it is. They're killing it. There's a lot of videos recently that you'll see. It's still happening in a lot of places.

Very popular. Can you bring up the Saul of Tarsus story, please? Yeah, Saul of Tarsus. It's a great story. He became Paul.

Saul of Tarsus, thank you. Saul of Tarsus was a key observer and a proving bystander at the execution of Stephen, the first Christian martyr. rather than casting stones himself. Saul guarded the heavy cloaks of the witnesses while they carried out the stoning. Wow.

And then who did he become? Saul of Tarsus, the road to Damascus. He's walking, has a vision of Christ. Jesus says, Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me? He's had a conversion experience.

The story of Saul on the road to Damascus is a pivotal event in Christian history describing Saul of Tarsus, dramatic conversion in the apostle Paul. traveling to Damascus to arrest and persecute Christians who was blinded by a divine light

and heard the voice of Jesus. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Now, there's a lot of interpretations of this event. Who knows? But this idea of blindness, Jesus curing the blind man, all this stuff, the blindness. This, to me, is the situation. We're kind of in a situation of- Blindness. An interesting kind of blindness because the modern mind thinks that they're very clear. They think that they're seeing things very clearly. They know a sophisticated person, it should be worried about, you know, there's a list of things you should be worried about. This means you're on the right side and you're sophisticated if you're worried about the right things. Certain things, if you're worried about them, mean you're a fucking piece of shit, racist, bigoted piece of shit. You got to be worried about the right things. But what do they all have in common? Worry. You need to be freaked out. you need to be worried scared that bumper sticker if you're not angry you're not listening now yeah that's one of the most satanic bumper stickers i've ever seen in my fucking life i think the devil himself printed that shit out it's basically like if you aren't angry something's wrong with you you need to be angry scared pissed off judgmental don't talk to those people don't look at those people don't think those thoughts everything about you is fucking Thank you.

wrong everything about them's wrong you got to be in a constant contorted state of deep anxiety fear and worry or you are not okay you are not a good person unless you're scared and we should

there should be a score now that you get to see when you meet someone how much time have they spent on their phone yeah what what what apps have they been on yeah what's you know i'm saying like because it's kind of not even fair that these algorithms the recent there was just an The Algorithm Act, what was that? They've been trying to get it passed for years now. And they've had some cases recently where Meta has been held liable. There was a girl that had a lot of suicidal thoughts and was, I believe, had an eating disorder. I could be wrong with that. Or was dealing with Algorithm Accountability Act of 2025 focused on automated decision systems in critical areas, jobs, credit, housing, health, education. And this is according to perplexity. But yeah, it's like these algorithms should be held accountable. We are letting these, that's where the devil, it's like, we're letting these things control because I'll watch stuff. I'll see some clips. And if you look at one, then something else comes up and now you're down a rabbit hole. Then you see somebody from that group, whatever that is in real life.

Yeah.

And you could have an energy towards them.

That's right. I mean, they got you thinking about reparations.

Yeah.

You're thinking about reparations a lot. Why?

It keeps coming up on my feet.

Your fucking algorithm is showing you this version of reality where there's people all over the place trying to get reparations which there are probably people there are people doing that yeah but probably not as many as you think there are because your algorithm is just like

look look what they're doing look so then i see like a homeless guy and he's like hey can i get a buck i'm like oh okay oh reparations you want reparations and that's just because of the you're

getting you're you're right you're contaminating yourself we all have it i have it too everyone

has everyone has it but that's the thing are we is there enough space to rise of is there enough space to rise above it i i think here's the thing we have to believe that there is and envision a possibility that where there is otherwise there isn't so that's one thing um definitely is but even just the fake ai stuff just to make things a little softer to soften up the conversation let's soften it up um what's a fake ai story oh did you see what was one brain i think i put it on the list of it's in my it's in my um oh yeah there was this girl kay oh yeah kaylee this was lawsuit she had she uh she argued that features like infinite scrolling autoplay algorithm recommendations and beauty filters were engineered to make users engage compulsively um true what breaks my heart sometimes though or i don't know if it breaks my heart but it kind of makes me i don't know it makes me mad that i got to sit with some of these guys and they act like there's no crime in their algorithms they act like there's no like um like evil goals behind it and i think it's obvious yeah that anybody can see where we're headed isn't a great place so do you think some of these technocrats just don't have a moral compass because something must be

wrong oh dude i mean that's a hole that's a deep fucking rabbit hole like you're okay because you're talking about like the galapagos okay galapagos islands right weird creatures there because they're separated from everything else right so when we're talking about the silicon valley tech overlords we're talking about a weird kind of galapagos island where you've got this set group of people who've been there for a while who have been engineering the technology that is now being used for mass surveillance for blowing up palestinians for fucking exploding parts of the world and for hypnotizing children into like being glued to the fucking technology right and so you're looking at like essentially a warlock's guild these are the wizards of the world they are summoning spirits via ai a lot of them were into the occult you can look that shit up and regardless i think there's public records of some of them saying that they used bf skinner the behaviorists um work and he was the guy who could make like pigeons tap dance and shit they coded that into the algorithm the same stuff they use for slot machines and stuff in vegas i've seen that right so these are wizards illusionists so dude it's like do they know what they're doing yes they were they're they're making addictive technologies can they say

that's what they were doing hell no do you think it's a unified goal or do you think they all just happen to each have these things going on and that's where we are dude i think that and i'll

come on i want to come on y'all show me we'll go down this rabbit hole i love to i listen man i Because we're going to get into some softer stuff. This is what I do know.

Uh-huh.

Before we get into the soft stuff, I do know this. Zuckerberg apparently doesn't let his kids on the fucking computer. Apparently, a lot of these tech people keep their kids off social media. I think I asked him about that, didn't I? What did he say?

I think I said, do your kids use...

use social media regardless they have strict fucking guardrails for their kids using social fucking media and that is is interesting to me it's like if this shit's so okay what's going on

yeah i think i let's check and see i'm gonna i'll find out in just a second i think we asked him about that um but yeah this was this was one thing i was saying about this like i remember watching this right i think this was last year a little bit but this is called brain bridge right play

this clip oh my god this is going to blow your mind a startup company called brain bridge announced today that they believe that they will be able to successfully perform a head transplant surgery in the next eight years the way that this would work is you would take a person with a perfectly healthy and active brain but their body has cancer or paralysis and transplant it to a brain dead donor body what's crazy is that they said that by doing this the person that's receiving the new body would still be able to maintain their memories cognitive abilities and consciousness they say that the brain could last several hundred years if it had a good working body and that that might be a potential in the future but that this would also give people with different ailments

a second chance okay wow i mean but this came out and i remember uh a guy sent it to me i'm not gonna say who it was but like kind of like a certain type of person yeah sent it to me yeah from um Birmingham or whatever and he's like man this is scary you know and I'm like that ain't real that's not real man you know I'm saying but it's stuff like this that we think like you know and then you probably have like like spouses like a woman she's like oh you know six more you know six more birthday cakes and because it said like six years it'll be happening right yeah six more birthday cakes and my you know i'm gonna have denzel washington in my kitchen or whatever or i'm gonna have you know debate you know my husband's gonna look like da baby or whatever you're gonna have like a 75 year old guy with like a body that like looks like a fucking like a california raisin and da baby's head like it's just gonna so but that's that's ai stuff you

know that's the things that people believe it's not real i've been what you know what ai's been showing me a lot of fake honey badger content videos like nature videos looks real like honey badgers like fighting elephants and horses a lot of ai videos of like um god what are those creatures that defend themselves with shit this is are you talking about those david attenborough fight night videos well yeah but people are now generating very good ai video of like honey badgers fighting shit and i was watching them for a while before i realized that's not real like because i love honey badgers it's a it's a different subject altogether but um a lot of these are fake as fuck or the hippos spinning their tails and shitting off you know they yeah doing that the blasting tigers away and stuff that's a lot of those are fake are they really i mean it's insidious it's at that level too it's not just head transplant like elephant shits on birthday party or whatever it's like go on instagram and look up like hippo defending itself and i'm pretty sure a lot of these are ai i don't want it to be ai i want it to be real but if you look up any hippo it's a whole genre now if hippo's shitting on various predators yeah if you guys can bring

some of those up we'll get right back to them um dude oh yeah i saw this thing the other day hot air balloons are being used for sex trafficking and that was an ai thing that's so and that was an ai thing dude it's so far so now it's like when you take one of the most beautiful like people are watching a hot air balloon race and there's some grandmother being like you know there's a

and you're you know there's a kid bound and gagged in the basket of that balloon getting shipped off to some fucked up island that's so everything beautiful you know brothels on the moon kids being transported in hot air balloons they're ruining everything but then they'll start but

then also what will happen then is this is then this this piece starts to happen they take a fake story like that right like the kids being sex traffic you know like in hot air balloons which just crazy yeah like like for how many people could even fit in 100 balloon probably six to eight a lot of kids that's true probably four to ten i don't know i think i could get 20 in there i don't want to know we could talk after the show yeah we're joking but dude we are joking jesus christ we're joking but then here's what happens is they put the story out right yeah then they become then there becomes this lobbying towards the government like now somebody's lobbying. We need to train officers. We need specifically trained officers who know how to fly hot air balloons so that they can be lookouts for this thing. And it becomes one of those Somali welfare things where it's just a money laundering thing, but it's all based off of, well, let's put the story out first, create the fear, create the worry. Then let's find this other big financial solution that we, and do all the training and all the bullshit. So we have something to invoice the American government or any government for. And then the people, our tax money just goes to

another thing now we have 700 you know trained like hot air balloon surveillance technology

i'm sorry i don't think you realize what you just did but you have come up with like an incredible series on like nbc hot air balloon like cop chasing sex predators through the skies dude that's an incredible show thank you like that would be really like really fun to watch

dude imagine you're ducking down in your basket yeah you get a new partner you do that heat thing

you turn it up dude i i would watch that all day long that's an incredible idea but yeah you're right it creates a chain reaction and essentially it's just shit tons of money gets wasted on something fabricated right by like a couple of like teenagers in morocco yeah and you don't or

wherever i don't know why i said you know but then they honor him at a football game it's like and there's harold arthur the third he did 17 years in the hot air balloon surveillance squad

let's give him a round of applause salute him yeah yeah man it's you're right and dude but they used

to have i remember they had this girl in our school and her dad and his friend i guess they were kind of gay men or whatever and they would uh they were hot air balloon guys but they would go up and kind of kiss whatever like they would like whatever meet up in this like not meet up i guess meet up in the sky or whatever you know how or just like lock their you know tie their

balloons off to each other how does that wouldn't the like it's like wouldn't the balloons themselves

bump into each other i think there's ways you can do that because that is like if you're gonna like

create sort of a spectrum of gay what's to hide they were scared to get seen around town so you level up like making out with another dude in a separate hot air balloon is that's

that's gay it's brave gays though it's brave pound brave gays how is that on a show that's

the name of the show that's it they're gay hot air balloon cops this is the next broke back mountain

do we have a beat of it here did he say anything i think that's a big part of it i try to like

it's important to me that that the kids get that too and the kids are very active um do your kids

have a lot of um like screen time like how much screen time do you allow your kids yeah um it's

different for the different ones we don't just like let them do whatever but i actually like want them to be fluent with this stuff, kind of like we talked about earlier. You know, I want them to learn how to code, how to use technology. I think it's important.

But he's not saying he wants them to use it. He's saying he wants them to know how to code and use technology.

I want them to be able to create the mind traps that I've created. I want them to be able to build manipulative, seductive technologies so that they can lure other children into my trap that will inevitably control the entire planet. but I would never show them the fucking hypnorectagle. I mean, dude. It's giving that, dude, a lot. Is there any more to it or that's it? It's a long answer to a simple question. Right. He could just be like, yeah, I put him on it all the time.

There's a lot of socialization. They have their own accounts. Obviously, like happens online at this point. Like people need to get used to the norms and stuff around that. So, I mean, they're not on, they're still too young to be using like social media, but they have messenger kids. You know, we, we, um, make it so that they can video chat and chat with their friends and, you know, we'll, we'll obviously monitor to make sure that they're, um, that they're just connecting with the people who, who we think that they should. but like i think it's actually good i think people need to kind of grow up um i don't need to is strong but i i think is um i think it's good if you have an engaged parent and and they um and and as a child you learn up you you you kind of grow up um learning how to use a bunch of this stuff so that's okay and that's all good i want the kids um to the extent that they're interested in it to learn how to code learn how to create stuff whether it's in like horizon or vr tools or they play you know roblox and minecraft roblox did he just say fucking play

roblox look up look up roblox like look up roblox pedophilia oh is that where they're doing it now dude dude this is like the new rest areas remember rest areas look at robot yes roblox is currently the subject of heavy scrutiny including investigations lawsuits from u.s state attorneys local governments and reports highlighting that predators exploit its massive demographic of young users for grooming and sexual exploitation yeah don't put your fucking kids on roblox or like man i'm telling you like people need to understand that dude do you remember like did you ever like dig

around for your dad's porn i remember digging in a hole somebody said there was porn somewhere like not far from us and we dug dude we dug as kids we probably dug fucking 11 feet into the dirt

a pirate buried his porn out there that's what black dude you just remember the we did find like a cpap machine though but go on dude my point is we all know that kids when they know like just based on like the experience of anybody who grew up in the 80s at least or the 90s yeah you would find your dad's porn yeah he could put that shit like in a sewer he could put that stuff right like he could keep it under his hat you would get it yeah so the like the idea that zuckerberg's throwing out there which is like you can like monitor your kids number one dude are you fucking kidding a lot of people don't have time to do that they and they don't understand this tech could be really dangerous for children oh yeah they don't have time to monitor number two the fact that he's recommending roblox which is you just pulled up is currently being investigated right now because is dude it's crazy he just told everyone watching your show he's like put your kids on roblox like you know how fucked up that is i don't think i don't think he intended to do

well it was a past episode it's probably one years ago right but still i think if i don't know do they know that pedophiles is going on on there like they have to know what's going on dude and for years there wasn't even a blockage i don't think between adults and kids messaging each other which would be the first fucking thing so part of me starts to question do some of these tech lords do they want pedophilia to be a thing that exists in our universe i mean let me answer

that question i this is the deal if you're making we need to ask a kid if you're making a a tech a like how much is money worth in other words let's just say you theo von invented an app and you found out that somehow children were being abused through your app you know what you do shut it down shut it the fuck down and apologize on that day and and and reparations give them that's your reparations that's what you do you don't keep something going that allows children to be abused the question is how much how how much is your mansion worth to you well here's

the thing here's the thing Duncan I agree with you but people keep saying it's about money if you won't it's not about money anymore it couldn't be about money if you have a lot of money it's not about money anymore it becomes about the next currency so other currencies are power and then some of the currencies it's like you get to be the king and then the king turns into a i think after king is a devil yeah i think it's right on the other side of being a king is it being a devil because there's there there's you know i'm saying like it's like everything's just a circle so if you're at the if you're a king yeah then right after it is devil yeah i mean you just have to

deal with the fact that the technology you create is being used to distribute child pornography and it's hurting children and then whether you the rest of your life should be spent stopping that from happening not getting taken to court to make that happen you should just stop it because it makes me question these guys a lot dude well you know human sacrifice especially the sacrifice of children is an age-old practice and just because like the energy is being extracted from children using a brand new technology doesn't change the fact that this technology is harming children.

And we're not saying that Facebook is doing that, but we're just saying that Roblox has accusations about that and that it's obvious that...

I mean, you can look. I mean, again, I don't...

There have been probably instances of adults commandeering children sexually on Facebook.

Obviously, I can't say with the authority of some of the people doing the investigations whether or what's happening but i will say that if you don't think that social media and online games is being used by predators to fuck with your kids you are a dipshit you're out of your mind what are you fucking doing and also might i just add and i know we're supposed to light things up when you're posting pictures of your fucking kids yeah in bathing suits in bathing suits or no shirt and you look and you can look at who's favoriting those pictures if 60 of those are like dudes in their 40s yeah what are you doing what are you doing well that's when you

start to realize that we like there's this vortex that you start to get manipulated by and that we're being manipulated it's like watching a belly dancer dance and next thing you've given all your money, and after you've given all your money, you You'll give her your kids, you'll give her your organs, you'll give her your offspring, you'll give her whatever it is. And you don't even notice you're giving anymore. You're not even getting anything out of it anymore. You were just tricked into giving everything all away.

That's right, dude. You said it. Praise the Lord. Throw your fucking phones in. Oh yeah, this is great. Let's watch this. This will lighten things up. It's hippos shitting on animals.

Oh yeah.

I mean, we all, like if we didn't. Ooh. It's not, I don't think that's real.

And now this, and look, dude, and they'll probably, they'll accuse the animal of doing blackface or whatever it's ai though right that's not real i don't know but this is the kind of stuff that just breaks my heart because he's poses like he

sits like he wanted to get shit on like it's not real right it breaks your heart it looks real

he's pissed bro and that cheetah is pregnant bro he's probably like i know where to get some lunch

and he's pulled that old it's gotta be fake and this is a whole genre of hippos shitting on

on jaguars and tigers don't come on my back and tell me it's raining brother why did he sit there like why it's like because it's the old hey let's go get some lunch i'm a shit on your trick okay that's the old thing bro that old class um what else do we have what other ai things are out there there's some other ai things that were fake or were there other ai things in the news or what else can we talk about is there something else on your mind you want to talk about on my mind yeah right now um yeah man do you feel hope as a parent that's a question is okay if i ask you that do you feel hope as a parent knowing seeing a lot of these open vortexes of the devil that are operating around us and how we are being like summoned to dance for them like the brooms and fantasia like but do you and and none of this is accusatory like i have the same stuff i'm like you know i try to battle it and it's probably easier because i have less responsibilities than you do as a parent but it's like um we're all fighting this thing you know yeah i i i will

never stop loving existence and i have i know that people are good in buddhism it's called fundamental goodness that underneath the the fear is goodness and when you're around a baby when you're around your kids you get to see that you get to see a brand new human before the the windshield gets like covered in splattered fear bugs that begin to define their personality And as a parent, you can't keep those bugs from splattering on the windshield. That's going to happen. But you also can at least help them understand that love is eternal, that love is eternal, that we're embraced by the universe, that benevolence, kindness, all the things that are taught in Christianity and many of the world religions, these ways of being are are not affected by technology, by AI, by all of the things that inevitably are coming down the line. This way, the actual term for Hinduism, I've heard, is called Sanatandharm. It means the eternal way or the eternal path. This path, it doesn't fucking matter if there's cyborgs walking down the path. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. And I think that's the most important thing to remember is that this, what we were today, we're calling the Satan. Satan depends on us building up that energy, making it big, scary. This is described as like it's the monster under the bed. It's darkness. Darkness is all you have to do. It's flip on the light. Amen. Gone. Instantly gone. And so the more I think we focus on that darkness and all of its complexity and all of its seeming sophistication and all of its tricks and deviousness. and deception the more powerful it becomes the moment you just turn into the present moment right and and your own heart and the people you love it's like a light turns on well i think we

need astronauts too sometimes to go into the darkness man we need astronauts to go in there find the switches too you know i think sometimes we need that i think sometimes as like we it does feel sometimes like we are too like there's like in you know a lot of times in christianity they talk about acceptance a lot and acceptance and acceptance and you know in a lot of religions they talk about acceptance surrender yes and it's like you can do that in some ways but also part of you is like but when do you like really stand you know i'm saying when do we stand up because we're creatures with legs yeah you know when do we stand up and um and not just accept everything and maybe that's the phase that we're in now and then part of me like i was talking my friend Curtis the other day and like we talk about religion a lot and things like that and it's and um and he was saying that it doesn't really matter if you win here in the world right if the world wins if we win as a

society here it matters in the in the afterlife in the next realm in like you know what i'm saying like um this is just a practice ground for your spirit like to see how you operate a spirit it's almost like like uh when you did like school driving or whatever you know and there was some guy who was like obviously a pedophile usually who would get to teach how to drive because they wouldn't let him coach him why they took away his whistle and so he's fucking sitting there just squeezing your thigh but dude he's in there squeezing your thigh he's like if i squeeze your left eye means turn left if i squeeze your right hand and i'm like why fuck dude why are you touching me dude so i was just going like in circles dude this motherfucker was just massaging me or whatever just fucked me up man but it's just like yeah but it's like is or do you think it mad because sometimes i care too much i feel like if we win here as a people as opposed to like if uh if my like as if as opposed to like best curing the meat of my soul for the next uh like refrigerator or meal or well charcuterie board of existence does that make sense

board of existence it's very poetic i know what you mean i i just think you know the the the move is you look at this thing and now you're worrying about literally all of humanity right how do i fix all of humanity it's that's a very anxious right it's an anxious place it's

instead it's not fair to you it's not fair to us you can't it's not your job and and i i think

that doesn't mean you should be some kind of impotent uh pseudo-spiritual person who isn't actively trying to make the world better but since you're the first part of the world you encounter, how much time are you spending seeing if you can reduce your own fear and anxiety and increase your ability to have compassion and love for the people that you encounter throughout the day? And, you know, if enough of us do that, and that is not easy, by the way. Right. But it's incremental. You don't have to do it all in one day, but you get to do small things. And you never know. I think if we're going to use the Bible as a reference for the conversation, doesn't the story go when Jesus sent out the disciples? He said, don't worry about what you're going to say. I will speak through you. And if your message is not accepted, leave and knock the dust from your feet, which is really just saying, stay in the present moment. Trust. Trust. Don't let this darkness trick you into getting all freaked out and angry. Because when you're angry, you'll say angry words. But this is a terrible way to ruin whatever the fuck I'm saying. Have you ever gotten in an argument on MDMA? Have you ever said a single shitty thing to someone when you're on ecstasy? Now, this is, I think, a way. There might be a way. I'm not saying be on ecstasy all the time. But imagine if somehow you could cultivate that part of yourself that shows up on a nice MDMA tab. If you could cultivate that in Buddhism, that's called bodhicitta, and it's the awakened heart. If you could cultivate that, then whatever came out of your mouth, whatever you did, theoretically, would be much better than what you do when you're angry, freaked out, scared, and pissed off. So maybe the first step is to take more ecstasy, which brings me to a plug for my new business, Trussell MDMA. Go to Trussell. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

Trussell MDMA church wafers too. That would be the best, dude.

No, I just feel like, you know, the idea is like as much as you can cultivate compassion in your own heart and see what happens.

The best thing I noticed too, I just go on a walk with a friend. When Saul was walking, dude, when Saul was walking, was he walking alone out there?

That's a great question. I don't know.

Can you look that up when Saul was on the road to, where is it, Damascus? Damascus.

I'm guessing alone.

No, Saul was-

No, what a girl. This is awesome.

No, Saul was not alone when he was traveling to Damascus. According to the biblical account in Acts 9, he was accompanied by a group of traveling companions who were rendered speechless by the heavenly light and sound. We all saw it. Wow. So yeah, I think, I don't know. I just, there's nothing I enjoy more these days, bro, than honestly just going on a walk with a friend or something like that. You know what I'm saying? Theo, you seem great. I do. You do. Thanks, man.

Yeah, your energy's really, like, you've got, what's the word? What do they call it now? Your aura. I don't know what the word. My kid the other day, it's so funny when they start saying, like, kid insults. And it's a brutal insult. He was talking about somebody. He's like, their aura's chopped.

Damn.

Have you heard that?

Yeah, someone said that.

Chopped aura. Your aura's not chopped right now, man.

Someone called me Chopped Ankh one time. What? Someone drove by and called me F*** one month ago.

What?

For no reason. Where? Huh? Where? Because I had two bags of fucking shopping clothes. Are you kidding me? Yeah, I know I bought a lot. But still, yeah. Yeah, dude, it was just because I think. That's crazy. I think because I was like tying my shoe, but I bent over like at the hip instead of like kind of squatted down.

That's fucked up. That's crazy, dude.

I know, that's crazy, dude. That's crazy. Because I like bent like fully. Just because like, yeah, I get it. But it's like, God, just say it. Roll the window up and just say it to yourself or whatever.

It's a rare experience for, right? Like, I mean, how often does that happen to you?

I don't know, dude, but I put stuff out in the world that didn't need to be out there, dude. Dude, when we were kids, we would write, this is horrible to say in this crazy way to end this conversation. Thank you for the compliments, dude. I am in a space where I'm trying to ask myself a few more questions instead of just take how I feel. I'm like, what's this feeling trying to show me? Like, you know, like, okay, if I'm angry, why, like, okay, what do I get by being angry right now? i'm just trying to question a little bit more about what's going on but when i yeah dude when we used to do this was kind of messed up we would like write that and we might take this out we used to write the n-word on a piece of paper right so to get it out of our system and we would put it into a bottle like a message in a bottle and then we throw them in this river not far from our house throw them off this bridge off into this into this river and then the craziest part was though dude like a couple months later we're over at the park which is like a mile from where we're throwing them off dude we see a dad and his kid find pick up a fucking pick up one of these bottles and he the kid opens it up it's so sad and the dad's like what does it say and we're just like oh bro we gotta find a better way to dispose of there's a racist dude shipwrecked around here so dude we live and learn man yeah that's what we do um you can live and learn um in one of the best possible ways dude this honestly the most fun conversation i probably had in a year

and a half oh that means the world to me theo that's the truth i love talking with you man it's such a joy thanks for having me on the show it's the truth you bet dude i'm gonna come on mystery

boys i want to go down a rabbit hole so we gotta we gotta procure a nice one um oh yeah and uh you can check out mystery boys um with the good we know he works for good kurt metzger i would argue saintly okay saintly saint metzger dude saint metzger i'll vote for it yeah um dungan trussell

thanks so much bro thanks for having me on i really appreciate it theo yeah thanks for watching

you guys now i'm just floating on the breeze and i feel i'm falling like these leaves i must be cornerstone oh but when i reach that ground i'll share this peace of mind i found i can feel it In my bones But it's gonna take

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