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merry christmas for a special edition of monthly mormon monday i'm paranoid american that's heidi

love how you doing good merry christmas merry christmas everybody this is the uh series where

one of us becomes slightly more mormon and one of us becomes slightly less mormon each episode and i think today heidi's going to be the one that becomes more mormon what do you think about

no zero percent chance or one percent chance no i'm done with the that whole thing it's all on you now you gotta if you're gonna do that you gotta get on that well well then tell me either

to sell me or to sway me away from it what's the difference between having a crisp like a full-on christmas as a full-on mormon versus a christmas as not a mormon since you're the only one out of

the two of us that knows the difference between the two well i mean it's really more about okay if you come from a typical mormon family and this doesn't mean every mormon's like this definitely we got to have the one-upping you know the one-upping is humongous in any kind of holiday in mormonism so you know they've got the biggest uh it's kind of like national lampoon's christmas you know he's out there doing all the lights and has everything and he's just wild about it that's kind of like that uh so gotta have all that seems harmless if anything that sounds like a good thing honestly the holidays you know are fun i mean they they go all out for christmas and halloween they freaking love halloween so more than christmas you've said a few times that

mormons like halloween more than christmas i mean it makes sense right it well it kind of does because christmas is an interesting one too right it's literally got the word christ in it but christmas will be completely unrecognizable for most people if you get rid of the tree if you get rid of the christmas lights and if you get rid of the presents if you got rid of those three things it would kind of transform into something that maybe wouldn't stand the test the time and people wouldn't even recognize it as christmas and none of those three things have anything to do with christ really right and you you've criticized i don't know if i agree with you yet but you've criticized that uh mormons tend to like leave christ out of their christian denominational church so it's kind of the perfect holiday for mormons then right because like i mean

the rest of the world's already leaving christ out they're little baby tamus oh no just kidding um so you know they just uh they they just do a lot of the materialistic stuff now i'm not saying that's everybody clearly we have many families that are are just typical families and maybe they focus more on christianity but as for the most of the mormons that i see you know they have the biggest tree and the best present wrapping skills and the you know perfect everything and their perfect six children with all their perfect you know but that's all that sounds good that all

sounds like positive things like i mean that part they wrap their gifts really well and that they've got like a really nice looking like light array for everyone to enjoy i don't know it's all sounds

like great things i mean it's fun you know there are a lot of fun things here you know there's traditional we have to go to i don't do this but many of the families go to temple square they really go crazy at Christmas on the Christmas lights. I think. If you haven't Googled the Christmas Temple Square Lights, it's crazy. They're pretty gorgeous. I'll give it to them.

Better than Rockefeller Center? Would it be worth it going to Salt Lake City over New York City?

I have not been to Rockefeller Center, but I will say that it's pretty good. It's pretty good. They spare no expense. We'll say that.

What was your Christmases like as a Mormon growing up?

well remember i had half half staunch mormons half biker crazy clan so depended on if grandpa decided to go get drunk that christmas because then all you know what broke loose because my grandma was very upset with that because you know she was the very staunch um but lots of tinsel lots of you know all the perfect christmassy things and she was very into christmas very

into christmas yeah and are there like midnight masses because that was the that's the big thing in catholic church is that you go to midnight mass on christmas no midnight mass no they got

too many kids for that business i don't know try and drag eight kids out of bed middle of the night

curfew to just mormons in general have a curfew like no one's allowed to be out after 11 p.m no

matter how old you are you know they're not drinking as much caffeine they've got too many

kids they gotta get to bed no no hot chocolate right if you're like a straight observer or

hot chocolate the church actually actually manufactures hot chocolate for their welfare program so hot drink thing though i know but then they changed you know that they change everything

well recently okay but i'm saying like growing up before they changed it because they changed it recently in like 2012 or something so what about in the 90s could you have hot chocolate

uh yeah they they've they've changed they changed a lot of things like yes you're talking about one time they made changes but there's been so many changes to the actual book of mormon itself if you got a hold of a really old book of mormon which we should probably do um it's not at all

the same so at all any weird mormon christmas chance no i mean they just use everybody else's like mormons contribute anything cool to the christmas chance i'm trying to think of it you

know mormon tabernacle choir is a big deal this time of year you gotta yeah but that's just like

the sounds of like kids singing that's that's not like a new song no no no mormon tabernacle

choir is a professional like traveling choir um and it's a cia front oh no i didn't say that what um they travel to all the different countries and then they have these you know grand choir concerts and then if you want to pay the extra money for the special chairs sometimes you know people that might need to talk that don't want to be looked at funny might sit by each other and have a chat, you know, like the Khashoggi family. No, no, that never happened. Yes, it did. Wait, who's the Khashoggi family? Oh, you know, in Saudi Arabia. Like, it's a whole thing. But yeah, no, I'm not kidding. They did. So in Watergate, just so you know, one of the main people that were under the Mullen Company was, of course, Howard Hughes, but also the Mormon tabernacle choir so i did a little episode on this with lds abuse justin and it was called um see the 13th apostle i think or maybe sinister secrets and he goes very into beverly bruff campbell and how she kind of organized this and it was a woman so that's that's different for the

mormon you know they don't normally you also recently did an episode on i want to say it was like dmt and christmas or something how was i not included in this i know janet janet from

deplorable nation she and i do a lot of medical series and they usually just end up on my patreon so we actually did a whole series on angelic visions so that's the only one that i let out to the public i might let out this other one about angel visions but yes about you know what would make you see visions the little diddy oil stuff like that you know uh back in the joseph time

of course not not diddy's blend but but but this was related to christmas or just because it's

it's december and you were talking about it yeah angels christmas we had to we had to push that into there so i thought that would be a fun one you know moroni okay well here's one of my favorite

like dmt adjacent christmas theories and i'm curious what your take

is that santa is a mushroom i'm sure you've heard this before if not we can get into it but that also for the same reason santa is a mushroom that jesus might have also just been

a mushroom i mean is that heretical is that is that going to send me i would say i i mean you know you were based as catholic they definitely wouldn't like that but i don't know i feel like

you could there's an argument could be had although if this were 200 years ago you might

not voice it publicly if we voiced it 200 years ago you and i would eat the hemlock right that's what we would have to do they would be like time for you to go now um but no we definitely were going into you know the rites of of like back in the day we all know that well look at the catholic mass they bring around the little thing with the incense in it that's like based off other things right that make you feel a little more relaxed back in the day yeah well

the catholic church is a bunch of pleasurists they had never invented anything to themselves

pleasurist or pleasurist yeah either one both oh my story before we yeah before we roll anyway yes and but it was strictly forbidden to do that outside of the time of worship so they weren't just running around you know shenanigans all the time but also joseph smith was known to do this in the school of the prophets right we know that he would uh have guys show up with empty stomachs fasting and they would partake in the wine sacrament and they would be a little seeing

visions themselves so so what what were they putting in the wine like what was the actual

ingredient you think it was real wine um and so on an empty stomach you know what that would do to you but but joseph smith and his family were definitely alchemists you know there's no doubt to me that they they were adept in pharmakia let's be realistic his mom was a lay midwife

you know so when you when you say real wine i mean i don't think even high alcohol content

on an empty stomach doesn't make you see visions does it well if you never ever drink ever because remember it was forbidden and then you do and you do it on an empty stomach but there is a whole series which we definitely oh it's like a show i don't know if it's a series which we should do and explore on essays on the hallucinogenic mushrooms speculated for joseph smith so

yeah is that already a thing that it was speculated because you know it it makes sense because of how much it seemed he was influenced by native american and even like central american culture right so he might have had an early jump on that he definitely well he was close with you

know dr nathan smith which they say he wasn't but he was i mean he saved his leg and he saw him multiple times of his life and you know he was the one that saved saved him from the typhoid fever but also you know look at the last name he's a distant relative on both sides a cousin of both of the parents um and you know he came from harvard he ended up leaving uh dartmouth college which goes into quite a tale there but he you know he was chased out of town for digging up people um but he went on to discover you do yeah i mean he's a doctor back then old timey stuff you know i guess you need parts to show people i you know never dug anybody up but hey that's a way to build your portfolio and your resume right well he did good because he went on to found yale's medical

school funny enough which is fundamental in the uh rockefeller system essentially because that's where it came was was to regulate the medical field nationwide and Yale was one of the center

points of that and you know funny that you bring up Rockefeller today I actually brought him up earlier because he is the seventh cousin two times removed to Joseph Smith and William Huntington Russell is his fifth cousin no times removed just straight up the line so so even early on

skull and bones and later on skull and bones right absolutely and it makes more sense right

like why why would they send these people out to start a sanctioned part of skull and bones

i mean that doesn't make any sense yeah but it does also the the whole like attracts like thing because we see this i mean it seems like a phenomenon first but then it makes sense why happens is that all these mormons that are inside the cia or

being used as spies and it's because i get like we've said this a million times because they don't drink and they don't do drugs and you're supposed to be able to rely on them uh whether or not you can but that like those these are all stereotypes associated with them some for very good reasons because they're true so they make for really great intel agents and spies but at the same time a mormon realizing that like oh man the cia wants me it kind of makes them like well maybe i want the cia too or maybe i also want to be involved with other secret covert societies because that's kind of my thing already i'm so good at it let me see how else i can expand so it makes sense that it goes both ways right because it's like two like things attracting each other oh 100 and when we get

into mormonism you have to understand one of the things you dedicate to them when you become you know upper in the church is your time and talents and your treasure so your money and your time and talents that i don't think that mormons lack in overachieving like we clearly are ingrained with that which maybe explains the crazy you know holidays who knows man when when asians and mormonism collide it might change the world yeah that's that's a whole nother level it's gonna be

like top of the top right top level because right now like white people still run mormonism right

for the most part but they're not they don't they never had an aversion to asians because you know they're part of the great white brother it's only one yeah but i get it in which white people are

not the majority mormons anymore because they've spread it too damn well to like more places than

they could have uh then they can control by themselves ah yeah i could see it i mean and definitely there are some asiatic roots you know that have spread out garrett gong i hate to use him as an example because he's got a lot of problems right now but i don't even know who that is well he's up there in the church but he's currently under scrutiny for a lot of abuse so with sra type stuff and so yeah

i mean you can't just say sra type stuff what do you mean sra that's the pretty wide gamut like underground tunnels under orphanages or what oh yeah like actual

accusations of course only accusations uh because he's you know currently still alive and stuff that are pretty ding serious and lds abuse covers this very well like like animal sacrifice because

that's when you say sri i'm thinking like mcmartin preschool level now yeah you're you're more on

track with the preschool with kids yeah so yeah okay just a reminder this is the happy christmas

episode everybody welcome to the happy christmas episode yes um so some of the stuff he said is

just downright demonic if if it is true and i don't know that it is because no one does right except basically him and he's not been proven guilty yet i mean but he some of the things i've seen that he wanted to do were pretty bad to children so he could yeah i hope he doesn't

have a good christmas sorry is there any you ever seen the movie like christmas with the cranks are you familiar with this one okay so this whole idea well in their case i think there were eight they were like dirty atheists right and they were like we don't believe it but there's also people that are saying like we're just going to skip christmas because it doesn't represent what it should and we'll figure it out in our own way or whatever is there a version of that in mormonism are there mormons that are thinking christmas doesn't represent christ enough so we're not going to celebrate it to its extent or would that be kind of rare i would i could see it there you

know there's a lot of different people that celebrate in their own way and i could definitely see some devout families you have to remember the really weirdo stuff that we talk about is not like the typical mormon family next door it's just not and so yeah i could i could see some people you know trying to make it more christ-centered yeah for sure um and also they have a lot of kids

so what about like yeah yeah how do mormons deal with presents if you got like 12 kids are you just going broke every or or does everyone because because it seems i'm just trying to think if i were mormon i had 12 kids or 20 kids i'd probably train them to expect maybe one gift maybe like a couple if they were like really cheap or something uh for christmas and you're not going to expect like yeah i'm going to get 12 gifts each right times 20 it doesn't work

right i mean we have six kids and they all have a significant

except for two and then there's grandkids and so and then parents so yeah we're yeah going broke

if my husband's like everyone's gifts this year we're praying for you yeah right yeah my if my

husband's down there in the comments he's gonna be like yeah and she spent all the money like yeah the kids get kind of spoiled but we just do our best to say you know this is i mean i think they've always known we try to hit like a major one uh pjs you know the night before and you know stockings and stuff i mean some sometimes you have to go more on necessity like if one kid actually really needs something but uh you know you make it work you do what you can do so it's it's still good i've always had beautiful christmases even as a mormon

okay i mean uh i'm still learning of that so it doesn't sound like anything that's going to turn me off of mormonism so far nothing seems off limits no you get to go home early no more nighttime mass you know yeah seriously that's a selling point no one's expecting me to stay up until midnight on christmas on the weekend or on a on a holiday but no alcoholic eggnog you know well that's fine what what about santa is santa yeah no they have him oh yeah oh definitely

they're not against any of that mormon santa the only mormon that's still allowed to have a beard still probably no i think they're kind of loosening up on that because it's been such a trend right i i'm i don't think they're as tight like as jehovah's witnesses on that so but i think

they've even changed that rule if i feel like the mormons too would really appreciate the santa tracker because it's kind of doing the traveling through through space technology thing at the same time right it feels like it would appeal to their sci-fi nature as well

and then it gets the kids excited to you know be a nasa leader like every mormon oh no i mean don lind there was a lot of that is run by nasa right it's a nasa thing or nor no it's a norad i can't remember which one does it it's well they're mormons there are a lot of mormons involved in nasa let alone uh you know you've mentioned three letter agencies and funny enough since i saw you last time i found a fun one a fun little rabbit hole i'll be uh doing a little expose on i mean

you're pretty into jfk stuff right as much as i i can be my life hasn't been consumed by it completely yet but yeah i've taken a serious interest over the last 10 years well you know

who carrie thornley is because he's really interesting right like he goes on to make a religion and everything do you know who that is go on he's a mormon he was a mormon he was raised Mormon what was the religion that he came up with oh yes oh I'll I'll find it it's a whole thing it's quite interesting it's it's a good one oh yeah so yeah but Kerry Thornley a lot of people don't know that about him so I will I will pull this up so I can tell you all about it I don't want to misquote because you know what happens when they do that he's the founder let's see of discordianism so and you know he writes all these books on like how i found the goddess and what i did when i found her and i was like all right i'm familiar with discordianism i had no idea that it came from a mormon though doesn't everything i mean yeah the discordian angle

uh it spawns into a million different other little sub paths too right because discordianism heavily influences robert anton wilson's illuminatus trilogy and his revival of bavarian illuminati and popular culture uh it also influences the finders group because the finders in dc reference themselves as kind of like an elite version of what the discordians we're doing but they're doing it in sort of like the political realm and you know in crazier realms than that so the learn this all comes from a mormon to begin with is kind of mind-blowing so does he stay mormon through this or does he convert to his own religion i mean you know don't

all mormons make their own no not everyone but apparently you know he did so no it's it's funny

you say that though because we both know multiple people that are quasi-mormon that have created their own versions of more and i'm talking about more than just one or two people right like like

like and

my friend exmojo that you met the one time he went on to found his own church it's a church of

atheism yes so that one doesn't count i don't think that that one i'm just saying still a church

i mean weird right is it tax exempt is it tax exempt yeah true but it is interesting it is

i think it's more of a podcast than a church but i get i get the idea behind it right right and i'm

just like this is wild like so many people that i and i told you before i think andreas went full blown i was like i think he's trying to start his own church and you just started laughing because i think you already knew and you were like i i think you might be right yeah shout out to x

church which is supposed to be the the real mormon church at some point i mean you know like i said

they changed the book i'm sure zerdas knows all about that so so i was also looking up i don't

know how much this even influences anyone in the mormon church but that the lds church openly acknowledges in any literature that you want to look up that christ was not born on the 25th like it's a well-known there's some people that get uptight when you even bring the concept up that christ wasn't actually born the day that we celebrate that he was actually born uh i think much closer to like april or something or at least uh that that was when the original beginning of the year used to be celebrated and that this one is clear i mean we're just telling the same story over and over again right but this is basically the winter equinox and that this is the celebration that the pagans were celebrating so then it was just the most convenient time to overlap with the church to be like hey you guys are already celebrating at this moment in time we're just going to go ahead and rebrand that for you so that you accept this new thing coming in and it's and it's interesting to me that the mormons just openly acknowledge that yeah yeah i i mean they

really you know don't hide any of that i mean look at the tax season right you can track this i mean they weren't they weren't making this pilgrimage for nothing they were going to pay the tax and do the census and all this stuff so i mean it doesn't align with december right that's that's not going to be when it is so um but i do think it's funny that you know the catholics bring it in and to kind of appease and then what's on the crackers the ihs right isis horror set no it's

not okay i don't i don't know if i ascribe to that i get it i've seen the documentaries and the posts and everything uh although that we're just talking about the jesuit the jesuit order i mean the jesuits have already got all their own interesting conspiracy uh that doesn't rely on them to be acknowledging isis orson said i'm sure i mean what they have in their vatican vaults i'm sure is filled with that but i don't know if it's one of those revelation of the method things like we got to show them the three initials otherwise we get some kind of karmic spanking

somewhere karmic spankings that's what it is i i don't know i just find it interesting i i will say you know i think clearly they folded i mean they had to make them happy right the people happy and this is goes back to the you know the menstruals and and the fools and i think we're right on you know what's today that this is a celebration day you would know no 21st yeah is this another baptist day there's so many baptist days not baptist pagan right i'll find it but anyway yes uh and and the solstice celebrations and all the things that they do like it's just interesting we're almost you know we we should have delayed but it would have been too busy uh but it's almost just a smith's birthday i think we should throw him a little

birthday party and yet so tonight the 21st is technically the winter solstice it's supposed to be the shortest day longest night all that yeah uh well yeah yule's another very yule is sometime between the 20th and the 23rd i believe it's like a span of that and that's when you burn the sacred tree so there's where the christmas tree comes in it's when they would bring the evergreen trees indoors is where that particular uh tradition came from uh and it was supposed to be a feast uh during the darkness so this is maybe where like the midnight mass even comes out of right so you can trace a lot of the modern day versions of this back to yule which is like

the germanic norse version of all that well and it's celtic too and they chucked it out and poor joseph he was celtic so you know i don't know i guess maybe they should have done a midnight deal

well and then and then you've got saturnalia which was

roman version of this which is like the 17th to the 23rd or so so we're like right in the middle of saturnalia and that was where i think we get the gift giving from um it was like this festival of abundance uh everyone was feasting out in public and there was also this thing called role reversal which was interesting and it's where masters would serve the servants they would like dress up and like bring them food and stuff it was kind of like a um it was like a kind of thing

yeah give me my figgy pudding song is actually fascinating and it's a whole different thing than people really realize right they're like demanding things and being like extra spicy then and they get the minstrel king and then you know the killing of the king and the whole golden bouting. And yeah, you know, some poor fool gets the best, you know, a couple of days of his life.

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for this day well we i did a episode of a cult disney with matt a couple weeks ago it'll it'll come out on christmas day just lined up with the day we usually release on thursdays and we did christmas uh sorry earnest saves christmas because it was technically released by touchstone and it was recorded on the disney backlot one of the only movies to ever be recorded in the orlando disney backlot and i don't know if you've ever seen earnest saves christmas it's like 87 i think um well it was also the same premise was done by the santa claus with tim uh allen was it in like the night like 95 i think and the whole premise is that in earnest santa's retiring and in the santa claus santa dies and in either case this old santa needs to be replaced by a younger santa and this is exactly the golden bow it's the um the uh the evergreen uh the pot the pine king versus the oak king and when the pine king dies he's replaced by the oak king and these are basically this forever yin yang battle where once the oak king gets old it's because summer's over and then the pine king comes in and then he rules until the winter is over and it just goes back and forth and it's literally the santa claus it's literally uh ernest saves christmas that is the

entire story very i that's interesting i didn't i didn't put that together for sure i like the golden bow breakdowns i don't know do you know dr luke johnson have you met him before yeah he's

got he's got like a series right he's got a whole series yeah and i think it's really good it's either chapter six or chapter seven of the golden bough that talks about this specifically it's

called the pine king versus the oak king and funny enough that we should bring that up you know those creepy coffin canes that i showed you with joseph's hair in it and they dug him yeah you got me one for christmas like i asked i might have i should have you know i don't have the blood staining and all that gross stuff that would turn it black it would just be plain old oak but it was oak and with his celtic roots and then you know the dead hair in there from hiram and joseph and the knob

super interesting uh the other so the mormon church admits that christmas is in christ's birthday but i wonder if they also acknowledge that it's directly based off sol Invictus which was the roman solar cult which is actually on december 25th this is the actual one that everyone's really celebrating right now today and it's about this unconquered sun that becomes reborn again which is today today is the day that it dies right the day that it's gone for the longest and as soon as it gets reborn on the 25th this is supposed to be when light defeats darkness all over again which is all astrologically accurate this is literally what's happening in the procession of the stars if you're observing it from certain places on earth right you're actually going to see the sun die and be gone for more than it's here and then it's that entire pattern is going to reverse itself on the 25th and that all that is really what you're celebrating when you say

christmas yes it doesn't have a lot to do with what people think it has to do with which and then you know you get into the whole version there's different versions but we definitely see you know child and mother people always

you know say oh that's jesus and mary but sometimes it's not so there's another one

the the celtic version of all this there was a celtic solstice and that one is also today it was uh al alban arthon and this was again the death of the old son uh and the birth of the new son this is also and sorry it wasn't the pine king it's the oak king and the holly king this is the one that uh fraser writes about in the golden bow i think it's chapter seven and it comes directly from this celtic solstice story and this is where you get the old man um that gets replaced by the new uh new year's baby as well right when like the old man is the old year going out and the baby it's literally the exact same premise except that one makes itself onto postcards and t-shirts in the 1920s uh versus the one that like their grandparents knew which

was the holly king and the oak king we can't have saturn you know in there and all the weird things with everything and people eating their children like that wouldn't make a very good postcard let's be realistic like would it no the old man is represented there so and and the old man of winter same thing like we all get back into this whole whole business and i just think well if people really knew like would they change it even the wreath all of it think of all the christmas symbolism it's all it's all from that you know they had to appease people they weren't going to just convert over and give up everything and they didn't same thing with easter maples you don't want to know what the maple is you guys anyway um and it's a palace right it's always that yeah symbol of fertility you know um i dare say that's why the mormon church took out the fountain of living waters because it was a little too on the on the nose maybe maybe they were like calm down over there you can't just be you know doing all that right in front of everyone because if the people know they know right it's like the phallus on one side and the fountain of living i mean it yeah and it didn't just it wasn't just a reflection pond it was spraying i don't know

maybe they got after him that's so another just question on the like your experience growing up as a mormon or just the mormon community because i've noticed in like other christian nomination like those um groups when you get closer to christmas people do get like more religious or now they're talking more about angels and god and stuff but then you wait six months since the middle of the summer or whatever they're not they're not talking about angels no one is no one cares about any of that so there's well this kind of fluctuation between you you're more religious closer to christmas and then less the farther away you get well so we talked about this

me and janet because of of there being more hours of darkness you actually yourself produce more dmt we produce dmt and so we produce more dmt and that's why people are more tired this time of

year and i don't know if that if that's been scientifically proven yet um we did a lot of

medical studies on that you do produce certain amounts of dmt and it and it does alternate with your melatonin production and your hours of of like darkness and sleep time it i mean it was a pretty pretty good one on that you'll have to check that episode out it's out now i thought it was good i'll have to check it out we did a lot of studying two nurses going down that rabbit No, no, we're talking about natural occurring DMT in your body. It naturally occurs. So no, I don't want to know what it's like to die. I've already done that twice. I've already almost died two times. I don't want to.

I mean, DMT is a chemical though, right? So whether it comes from outside your body or it's generated inside your body, there's really not that much of a difference, if at all.

i mean it definitely woke me up i'll say that much after i tried to die i definitely woke up

so there's that i didn't see any angels though we need to get you just some good old normal dmt

without the dying no i don't know i'm too afraid i have adverse reactions to all the things and i'm allergic to everything so i'm like people like have all kinds of fun on just regular weed and it makes me paranoid and go crazy and and count my heartbeat and I think I'm gonna die

forever so I don't know Joseph no more weed no more mushrooms Joseph no I am like none of your friends either nobody no one's allowed to do it I don't like it oh I just sit there holding my

wrist like counting my heartbeat like it sucks because everybody else is happy and eating and And I'm like, when, uh. when does this part start like when does this go away this is not fun you got to make it go away

and i know that sounds so crazy and impossible but it's like you're the one that has to make

that go away oh i tried somebody said try i've tried them all i've tried i definitely do not

recommend that that's i did that i'd recommend it was awful um it was that was on on other ways if you're if you were like i don't like where this is going there's ways that you can mitigate it you can just go and like munch down on christmas cookies or whatever right and that also if you did an edible there's no way out of it ride that thing until it's over i my husband had a great

time i thought i was gonna die like but i have really severe ptsd so i think for people that have that it's a different thing because you're in fight or flight all the time and you don't relax and there's nothing that you can do to talk yourself down. You just go into like the worst parts of life and you're like, Oh my gosh, why would you make me remember this? Like, it's not a good time. I'm glad for people that have a good time, but as for me, I'll just stick with a glass of champagne. That's, that's perfectly great. So no Christmas mushrooms either. I assume for Heidi. Oh no, no, I can't even drink too much. Like it's, it's a very moderated everything because Heidi doesn't do well with it. But the funny thing is when I go in for surgery or something, um, they're like, you're like putting down a horse or something like you, you metabolize everything really fast. And even my dental work, everything, I am a rapid metabolizer. This is a real thing. And it sucks even with just, you know, lidocaine, novocaine, anything. It doesn't have to be drugs per se um and they have to hurry like with my teeth and and all the things it's just awful but I did find out my doctor one time recently he was like your kidney function and I was bracing myself like uh-oh what he's like 100% and you're like halfway through life like

100% I was like great if anyone needs a kidney transplant this is the one you want right here

oh i don't know i got a lot of other things that go along with that they would never let me be an organ donor anymore what is it like haunted problems um after you have radiation you can't be a organ donor anymore so much and they don't

i'll take a 100 operational radiated kidney over a 50 non-radiated i mean hopefully 50 percenters

aren't donating. Ouch. But yeah, no, I get it. But yeah, I, I, there's just some people in the world that are like that. So it's crazy. Like surgery. One time I woke up in the middle of that sucked that, and they thought I was full of it. And I was like, you went to Alaska on a fishing trip. And he was like, uh, we need some medicine over here. And I remembered it after I fully woke up, like out of everything. I was like, that sucked, bro. I was like, you dick. i was like put me down he was like i tried i don't know what to do i was like yeah okay my

dad was the same way so some of us get unlucky i guess you were saying before how the i mean i don't think this is exclusive to mormons at all but the one upmanship even you said christmas vacation and they weren't mormon i don't think that'd be cool if they were but uh that same premise of everyone has to like keep one upping each other he wants to build the pool right to

show off to everyone how great his bonus was and all this that's exact yes and secretly he's kind of perverted and having all these little fantasies about that perfume lady yeah i think he might have

been mormon i don't think mormons own any sort of exclusive rights on any of that that's just

a normal guy thing uh you might want to look at their levels of uh subscriptions to those type of websites in utah it is sky high because they're so repressed in other areas that they and they can't do the things so you know they do the other things yeah well and pharmaceuticals what was like

uh like the ideal christmas present in you know young mormon days like the where people just want nintendos and cabbage patch or was there anything like weird that you wouldn't expect from outside

the mormon community the one thing you would receive in a mormon household that you wouldn't receive anywhere else on earth is something called a ctr ring and it's a little shield a green shield and it has the word you know little initial ctr choose the right and you wear that or a ctr necklace but you would never receive a cross that is a no-no in in a mormon home you would never have a cross or receive a cross uh but you would definitely have a ctr ring so

and what the hell is a ctr ring supposed to do for you i hope you choose the right kind of like what would jesus do type stuff is it something you'd only wear

during christmas or does do a more a mormon just gets this whenever someone runs out of ideas they

just start giving you that i think i think though we would exponentially get them at christmas time to remind us to behave ourselves right like the new year is coming you better watch yourself yeah

but you get that first so because if you say the what would jesus do bracelet but usually that's something that someone would get for themselves as like a personal reminder of keep your faith or you know act right or whatever but if you were to get that for someone else it's almost like a backhanded compliment it's almost like a passive aggressive is that what makes it the perfect mormon gift is because it's passive aggressive

i mean they all are yeah that's real um so i would i would definitely say that's a definite thing like you would definitely not balk at getting that for a birthday or christmas time a journal they are really i don't know if i've ever told you this you know they really recommend that we keep a journal in the lds church every day whether or not it's an exciting day or not and sometimes when i used to be young i thought this is so dumb what am i gonna write i played with my stuffed animal and like brushed its hair i mean i don't know i played dollies today like it was kind of a silly thing to me but they really really wanted that ingrained in everyone and so that's why they have so many amazing journals that tell us so much it's also very very masonic oh of course i mean you know history because it provides some sort of intel if anyone

were to be like now give me your journal they could figure out if something happened in an area by reviewing everyone's journals but also it gets you in the mentality of being able to self-report everything that happened every day so that not not just that you can do it for yourself but if they were to call you in and question you that you've already got a pattern of uh you know recalling things and describing them in a way yep it's all just secret society intel stuff oh of course of

course i mean that that's how come we know uh i believe it was i'm i'm almost certain wilford uh let me just check one of the president one of the presidents of the church actually died at the bohemian club because he was keeping a journal of who he saw and what he did that week and it was very interesting it was he died at the bohemian club well he was there let me make now i don't want to you know we gotta make sure but i'm i'm pretty sure so we we want to report correctly of course but yeah he was out there and i mean you already said it so now now you're just backtracking to make sure that it's true let's see he was uh yeah and the bohemian club okay oh here it is

so wilford woodruff yeah he he really was there yep i don't know this yeah so fourth president of the church of jesus christ latter-day saints 1889 to 1898 which checks out because bohemian club is super old it's uh 1880s so this is like one of the earliest ones uh and it says that he spoke at a banquet given by the bohemian club in san francisco shortly before his death it says that after he gave the speech in august of 1898 he fell ill and died a few days later

so the last some intestinal stomach issue yeah that's actually pretty wild i've never heard that before and they say that they think it may have been uh arsenic poisoning from the bohemian mill is the big you know like woo-woo about it right from the bohemian what from the mill oh from the meal that was served there and and his in his diary uh it is seems to imply that colonel isaac trumbo was the one that invited him there so that's fun it's all super fun you know i've learned so much this week uh well this whole month has been quite interesting yeah they were lobbying for statehood and they were you know they're talking but yeah seems very i don't know

interesting since you brought up a bohemian club which is pretty crazy that there's even connection to mormonans now um there's and also a delineation just in case anyone cares about the nitty gritty facts this happened at the bohemian club not at bohemian grove the club is a nationwide club that has a bunch of different places they meet one of those places a building in downtown san francisco and then their summer and uh

spring encampments those ones take place in the middle of the woods at the grove but it's the club that's meeting at the grove but he didn't die at the grove he died at the club but at the grove is where they do the cremation of care ritual and as i've been talking about with my friend david charles played on singtang for the last like year or two that the bohemian club cremation of care ritual when they they cremate an actual human effigy named care which is supposed to represent a personified version of their actual care in the world like all of the complaints they get all the weight on their shoulders because they're so rich and powerful and everyone's chomping at the bit to like you know suckle from their teeth so they burn care but that ritual itself is just another version of the golden bow it's but but it's an inversion right so the natural order is that you would burn the oak uh the oak king in the middle of that period of time and then it would eventually get replaced by the holly king but what they do is they they prevent that from happening and they control which king dies and which king lives so it's an inversion of that natural order it gets it gets way deeper than that but again here's technically a christmas

tradition connected to the bohemian club very and and i have to say it you know i i really believe if we're we're going on the golden bow here for a minute this may be what made howard hughes so crazy that i think they convinced him he was one of the kings because he stopped okay if you look in the golden bow it says the king's hair cannot be cut it has to be stolen from him and his nails cannot because it has to be stolen from them when they sleep well he never slept ever and then so he just stopped looking normal because they couldn't get to him and he was so weird about being touched i don't think that was going to happen and he also stopped walking on the ground without tissue boxes on his feet and it says that the king doesn't touch the bare ground so it's really interesting when you look at some of that stuff and then you go what did they say to him like what what did bill gaze say to this guy like what but you know because the super og version of

the golden bow that fraser was talking about was apparently based on a real um tradition where i think it was like a freed slave would become the king of this tiny little island and on the island with this big tree but he had to protect that tree at all costs and originally the tree and him were kind of the same thing it basically meant that at any point someone could come and challenge him and if they challenged him by killing him then they became the new king and people would come and travel and venerate them and stuff but also like if you were crazy you might get thrown into this little area but like you said once you're the king of this particular area of where this golden bow is at you kind of go crazy because anyone that passes by is potentially someone that's there to kill you and become the new king so you learn how to survive by just like barely sleeping ever because otherwise you're always on guard right so uh i think that i don't want that kind of uh kingship but that's that's this entire perpetual system that we're

even celebrating right now at christmas yes and and it makes more sense why he was doing a possible amount of drugs he was although i think they were slipping him stuff nobody breaks off needles in themselves. Let's get realistic. Those needles were brutal back in the day. You might do that once. But if that's happening, which they were found on his autopsy, there were multiple needles broken off in him. Nobody does it like that. Let's get real people that do drugs know how to do it. Let's not be stupid here. So that kind of thing happens when the muscle tenses up because you're being forced to do something and it breaks off. So but it may have been in their attempts to make him sleep because he may have been taking uppers is my my guess you know to stay awake just like

you said which feels like a mormon friendly thing or at least mormons could procure that for you even if they themselves are not allowed to do it right they admitted they did yeah they admitted

they did in multiple books uh one of them being uh let's see i'm trying to remember which one that was i'll think of it in a second but it was a great book uh i'll think he worked for him and he spoke all the time about like all the people that were procuring all the things he needed definitely so uh fun fact bill gay's you know daughter-in-law because um he's passed away now but heather gay real housewives of salt lake city she's gonna release a tell-all all about the mormons and i kind of giggled to myself i'm like i wonder if it's gonna include the tell-all about her dad being in the fbi but who knows i mean hey it'll be a tell some but probably not yeah i don't

don't think so yep i don't think it's gonna be telling that part but he had a really cool job he was like at indiana jones just so people know um he got the state award and he would go on all these crazy trips and procure ancient things out of museums and whatnot so he's you know dialed in

pretty interesting fun fact i'm hearing salamander letters part two maybe

i mean one oh we need to do that yeah for sure for sure and i mean look christmas time anytime is always cia time in mormonville you know or fbi what do you mean by that well yeah it's the number one recruited place period so it doesn't surprise me that heather gay's dad was in the fbi so yeah you know the current prophet you know the current prophet and the current pope are both rooted from chicago from so dallin h oaks was over at the university of chicago for a long time running things and and you know the pope is from there too and then the mob is from there it's super interesting yeah erica kirk's grandpa this weird biking club is there also and they have this really cool secret society since we're talking about secret societies called owl and snake and nobody knows anything much about it but i did find the logo and of course i can't like nail down who was in it but it was alive during the time dylan h oaks was there not saying

it was in it just saying is was this like a college fraternity owl and snake it's just like skull and bones is you know yeah okay let's put skull and bones is a finals club at um heart

yale yeah yale wow okay but we all know that this is i mean you know book and snake they have book and snake and university of utah has owl and key and then we've got you know this one alan snake out in chicago so kind of fun kind of fun facts which one would you join if you had to gun to head i mean gun to head may as well stay in utah i guess and do that one just geographic convenience yeah i mean gun to head there you go but they wouldn't let me in anyway i'm a girl

i mean you've already been through the temple ritual so what what crazier thing could they

really be doing ah i think they do a lot i mean i'm i've heard some crazy things in their initial like i don't know i don't have the thing to do the things too in the coffin because yeah anyway i hear they get chummy in a coffin in the dark but that's just what i heard well i hear what happens in the coffin stays in the coffin right it shouldn't get out at all at all period but we do have a lot of of correlation there and i the more i find out the more interesting it's it's just so much fun like you know dallin h oaks was actually kind of let go after a little while from byu because they said he was basically running a three-letter agency recruitment so they were sending all these young men from the college straight over to the three-letter agencies and off to missions like the first missions in El Salvador where you know one of them was let me think of his name I can I can think of it Scout not Scout Croft there's another one I'll think of it in a second but basically his grandson was the first one and his uncle was in the FBI. So I find that fascinating. I think it's fun. Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, you're already

going to send them off to go on missions. It just makes sense. Like both of those words end up

meaning the same thing. Exactly. And listen, what better way to hide if you're going to send somebody out to either train them for three letter agency stuff or to initiate them into the mysteries of all the unknown fun stuff like you know the literal like underground stuff um that they would have to go learn at 18 just send them off and nobody would know they're just on their mission

nobody needs to know that right mission well and so they have a cover to be there for some kind of altruistic reason if anything goes wrong you could just be like oh they're with the church and i want this agency but also it's usually these religious missionaries that end up getting the insight on some other kind of secret religious insight from some other little sect that they

intersect with right exactly it's very it's very interesting like and cleon skousen is the person that i couldn't remember I don't know. just so people don't come at me, bro. Like, there it is. You guys can look it up.

And what did Cleon Skousen do?

That was the, his, his nephew was the one, was the first missionary in El Salvador on a mission. So I bet he was, I bet he was. Yeah. But you know, these correlations are so much fun. I've had an actually really interesting week. I've had some really great interviews that i'm going to be releasing one of them all about secret societies i spoke to david livingston and that was an amazing interview we'll be releasing that soon as well as um another one that is hot on the presses and i've already done one with him from tree of liberty ben and we also go deep into all these fun three-letter agencies and secret connections um so yeah secret combinations is

what we like to call them here in utah and you just had a show with archaics too right what was

that about that was great yeah no that was let i mean we did touch on secret societies but that was more general like mormon you know questions and it actually went really great that was a fun one that one went all over the place so i think that was really informative and really fun if people didn't catch it so i would i would check that out what you were talking about mormonism i assume for part of it yeah yep he he didn't i mean he'd had not some knowledge too and so the back and forth was really good so it was it's a good lay down it's not like these other two that are coming out that are really hyper focusing in on these different secret societies and how mormonism plays into that which fascinating stuff like here i'll tell you a fun fact that i learned this week. So there's this guy and, you know, his name is Mazer, M-A-E-S-E-R. Okay. And they bring him in and he's the first principal of BYU. And I thought, okay. And on X, we've had this group and they've been showing me stuff. I've been showing them stuff. And I finally got a copy of the book because so many people were saying it was BS because, oh, it's AI, it's this, it's that. right and so I thought okay I'm gonna find the book because a lot of people here get rid of them they're second-hand bookstores I found the book and sure enough it's true and they talk all about Mazur and and what he did but you know funny enough guess who he is related to he's the great uncle of Peter Till how fun is that that's pretty fun well he's my great uncle too so that's not that crazy i mean hey then you know byu principal there you go well if we're doing

a little plugs here and there i've got an episode we just recorded on a cult disney with isaac weishaupt um you know legendary isaac weishaupt but we were reviewing the movie zootopia the first one i guess the new one just came out uh so i'm gonna have to

see that one too have you ever seen the original oh yeah oh my kids love that show yeah

for sure i gotta say after re-watching it for watching it maybe for the first time ever uh it is a top tier disney movie it's easily top 10 might be top five even it is that good of a disney movie compared to every other one that's come out since maybe the 90s really and it's also the most direct example to teach kids about how government corruption and overreach work how mk ultra works it's literally a a story about how the government has all these factions within it that are infighting and are trying to push each other out and then it shows even the good cop right the bunny is like the good person in this movie but she's figuring out like if i want to get onto this property this private property but i don't have a warrant how can i do that and she gets her friend the criminal to like break into a property and then she'll say well now i've got probable cause i can go onto your property because her friends are the one that did it and it's just an interesting thing because you know as you're watching it you don't even realize that you're teaching kids and here's how police are able to skirt around the law here's how they're able to trample your constitutional rights for the greater good but it like teaches them in such an approachable way honestly you can't i can't name a single other disney movie ever that shows kids literally like here's how government corruption works from the inside out in such

a easy to understand way it's all utopia oh my gosh yeah looking thinking back i haven't seen it in a while but yeah i think yeah it's wild because it's true right like they're they're programming them from a very young age for a lot of this it's interesting there's layers to it

there's a lot of layers to it i highly recommend it it's uh you can find it on the occult disney audio podcast right now and then i gotta edit together a little video and clips and all that

stuff that'll sound great yeah i love it we're not going to connect again until after new year's so like what mormons do on new year's you're not allowed to stay up late and drink champagne right

so so this is a funny one so the adults in utah go back to prom and i'm not kidding what they go to prom they make adult prom basically they dress up and they can go to these fancy things these fancy shindigs that are like a prom like with dinner and dancing it's not it's not bad yeah and but i will say this the dinner was good and the dancing was fun we did it once and then i was like i love you but no no he because he surprised me i was like i i love the thought but like the vibe is just yeah i'd rather go to the bar you know if that's your thing is that a yearly thing

like you would go every year you'd go to a christmas prom or a new year's prom i bet some

people do every year because they don't get a whole lot of chances to get out you know if you've got a lot of kids so and of course this is back in the day this is back in the day stuff like i mean i'm sure it's different now maybe families aren't as big or whatever but this is typical mormon stuff for me thinking you know and the wife finally gets to dress up and wear some heels and you know, take her out for a good time, buy her a flower, maybe, you know, it wasn't bad.

I'll give it to him. It wasn't bad. So, and are you still, are you going to practice Mormonism

this year? You're going to do it this year, right? No, never. Why not? Because I love that time and you're just going to give it up now. Oh my gosh. I, well, I gave it up a long time ago. Yeah. I've been out for years now oh yeah no i'm just a born-again christian non-denominational which he hates he says that's the worst ones thomas always tells me that so we'll do we'll do more

mondays we're figuring it out it might not be on monday it's never on monday it's monday when we

say it's monday we're keeping the name yeah we're keeping the name i like it it goes well well any any parting christmas wishes i just hope everybody has a really um good christmas you know stay grounded even if you go to your crazy family's house and they drive you nuts just remember people are taken from this earth quickly all the time so enjoy them uh put aside what they do and love who they are we all have some crazy aunt or some crazy whoever i'm probably the crazy one there. Cause you know, the in-laws and they're all still in, you know, I'm the only one that's out. So, um, yeah. So yeah, it's interesting. And, um, we, we just need to remember that we need to remember that, you know, it's a hard time for a lot of people and we have to remember that that can be hard for everyone. So there are people that you can call if you need to reach out, get help um do that you know as best you can and especially with the new year coming up and don't drop out on your changes you know if you want to change something it doesn't have to be in the new year which isn't really the new year either so yeah how inspirational my my advice is

like gonna be snarky and and way less i guess like valid but i would say that this is the best time of year if you didn't do it for thanksgiving when you're around your friends and your family you don't get many opportunities to remind everybody about the vaccine and Jeffrey Epstein and everything else that normally doesn't come up because everyone's so busy well everyone's got like a week or two off now so it's the perfect time to bring up all the crazy conspiracies bring up pizza gate again no one talks about that anymore bring that up at like Christmas gatherings and just see who who vibes with that i'm just i'm uh morbidly interested to see how many you know families will gather around that or if they just tell you to like stop bringing it up otherwise

they're gonna ask you to leave like they did yeah you gotta go yeah no that's actually fun but it won't make you very much uh on the wanted list for the next party it's sometimes i mean not

anymore but it used to be like my favorite thing looking forward to getting together at these big can you know family reunions and gatherings was that i knew someone was gonna bring up um it was back when it was like mueller and like trump was under investigation and you'd have half the family that's like he's going to jail and the other half it's like no he's not and i don't know i actually looked forward to those ones because i knew there was going to be a really interesting debate and it was going to be more about you know uncle so and so had fluid in his knee and they had to drain it and something went wrong like those are the other stories you end up getting at those so i

prefer everyone getting crazy over like whether or not epstein was in on and something i mean

definitely a rabbit hole indeed that is for sure for sure and you know we know some mormons made it on those flight logs so hey you know check that out that'll be a good upcoming episode

mormons on lolita express they were there was at least two well with that i think that's the best way to leave everyone merry christmas uh check the santa tracker i hear he is taking the lita express this year uh because epstein doesn't need it anymore merry christmas everyone bye-bye