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From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm the man who, for some reason, thought now was a good time to start a career in public radio. I'm Alzo Slade, and here's your host at the Bass Concert Hall in Austin, Texas, Peter Sagal. Thank you, Alzo. Thank you, everybody.

It's great to be back in Austin, Texas. We have a fine show for you today. Later on, we're going to be talking to Alana Myers-Taylor, the most decorated black winter Olympian ever. But first, we are so excited to inaugurate what cultural historians of the future will refer to as the Alzo era, as we welcome Alzo Slade as Weight Weight's new official judge and scorekeeper. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Peter. Thank you so much. This is very exciting. but also now that you are official you are able to wield the awesome power of judging and score heapering so as you start your reign what do you want people to know about you

that i am the most decorated black scorekeeper in wait wait history

so if you want to be the first contestant of the alzo era give us a call the number is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi,

Ryan. Wait, wait, don't tell me. Hi, this is Jenny Stout calling in from Salt Lake City, Utah. Salt

Lake City is a fabulous place. Speaking of Winter Olympics, what do you do there? I support graduate

students at a local university, and I am a busy mom of two kids, but most importantly, I am doing this to honor my late father who taught, who introduced me to the show and taught me to love

NPR. Oh, that's so wonderful. It's always lovely to hear. Well, Jenny, it's great to have you on the show. Let me introduce you to our panel this week from Austin. First up, a comedian and fashion designer whose new fashion project, House Cardi, by Michelle Wolfe just dropped. It's Brian Babelov. next one of vultures comedians you should and will know of 2025 it's rachel costar hi jenny thank you hi rachel and host of the hit podcast breaking bread with tom papa it's tom papa hi so jenny welcome to the show you're going to play who's alzo this time alzo slade is going to read you three quotations from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain two of them, you will win our prize. Any voice from our show, you might choose for your voicemail. Are you ready

to go? I sure hope so. I've been cramming all day. You have. All right. Well, here is your first

quote. And as I'm sure you'll recognize from Alzo's invitation, it is vanilla ice.

I don't even vote. So I don't even care. I'll go play for Putin if you want.

Warm body, Vanilla Ice, was one of the few performers not to drop out of a concert on the National Mall celebrating what?

America's 250th birthday.

Yes, that's exactly right. For their big party on the National Mall, the White House proudly announced a lineup of American music icons like Vanilla Ice and Bret Michaels from the band Poison. Seriously, it was like they just wrote down all the names from the Grammys in memoriam reel.

So is this tied to the cage match that's going to happen on the lawn? Oh, it's all part of the big festivities. That's all part of it.

The cage match, they've been building this thing on the White House lawn to have a UFC, basically a cage match. Yeah. That's going to be on Flag Day, which, oh, by the way, what a coincidence, is also President Trump's 80th birthday.

Let me just say this about that UFC thing. If you look at aerial footage of the White House, it looks like what they thought the White House was going to look like when the Obamas were there. It looks like Breaking Bad Meth Lab House with the construction of the ballroom, that UFC. It looks like Air Force One is on some blocks. It looks, it looks

It's wild. It feels like when you have a house guest and you can't kick them out and they're ruining everything and you're like, we'll just clean it when they're gone. Right.

All right, Jenny, here is your next quote. It's about a hot new director in Hollywood. He got his start at age nine posting videos of himself playing Minecraft. That was Variety magazine talking about 20-year-old Kane Parsons, one of the hot new Hollywood directors who got their start making videos for what platform? YouTube? YouTube, yes! Yeah, I just said it, okay. The horror movies, Backrooms, made by Mr. Parsons, and Obsession, both made by former YouTubers, are dominating the box office. They grossed over $100 million on their opening weekend. It's so wonderful to see theaters filled again with young people, all of whom had to jump up every four minutes to hit the skip ad button on the screen.

It's hard to get people out to the theater these days. It's hard to get people to the movie theater to buy $50 popcorn.

It's tough. And yet they have managed it by giving these young filmmakers an opportunity to make real movies. Have any of you seen these movies or did you follow their careers on YouTube

prior? I haven't seen them, but I have two daughters who are in their early 20s, so I know enough about them. What do you want to know?

Did they come home and tell you all about it?

Yeah, they're really scary. They showed me the trailer for the backroom ones. There's a lot of hidden undertones. Hidden undertones. And secret messages.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The directors of these two films are 26 and 20 years old. That's half the age of Martin Scorsese if you add them together. And the director of this movie, Back Rooms, he's 20. And the movie is based on this series of YouTube shorts he started making when he was 16. He has a good chance to be the first big Hollywood star to become a has-been before he can legally rent a car.

Wow. Yeah. They are talented. I mean, when you, when I, my daughters, they just, you know, I've been waiting for this moment to happen because young people are so into the tech and they're so on top of it. And now that they can make legit films out of it, it makes perfect sense. My daughters, within 30 seconds of taking a picture, are able to take that picture, zoom in on my fat neck, and make that the picture. Right. That's the thing that counts. Skills.

Mad skills. They're going to save Hollywood. Yeah. Your last quote is an official statement from the Tampa Bay Rays baseball team. Tarps off. Let's go. So tarps off. It's the hottest thing in Major League Baseball right now. When you hear tarps off and you're in the stands, you are supposed to do what?

Oh, jeez. They take off their shirts?

They take off their shirts, yes. Oh, my goodness. Of course, taking your shirt off, that's tarps off. What started as a quirky thing among a few fans has spread across Major League Baseball with hundreds of fans at each game piling into sections of bleachers, all taking off their shirts, waving them over their heads. some people are praising this trend as being body positive as in i am positive you guys should put

your shirts back on because i'm gonna be honest with you this is an opportunity for whatever male sports bra situation yeah it was a lot of like white man titties out there nothing wrong

with that y'all does it help the team win when everybody uh takes their top off apparently

yeah but that's what happened it happened in uh st louis cardinals game and these guys started doing it and apparently the cardinals rallied and won and everybody's sort of saying oh it was the

guys yelling been taking off their shirts oh wow the announcer was like oh momentum's shifting out Oh, those areoles, the momentum is shifting. They're picking up some steam with all those areoles.

After that happened, by the way, the Cardinals manager, this is true, bought out a section of the bleachers personally and offered the tickets free to anyone who would come and agree to take their shirts off. And you know manager's season is going great when he's trying to distract everybody with, look, naked fans up there. What are the women fans doing? Can they do this too? To my knowledge, and I'm not sure, women have not yet participated in this trend. Why? Feminism, listen.

Feminism needs to step it up, okay?

Yeah, they should do, they don't want the team to win?

Alzo, how did Jenny do in our quiz? Jenny made her father proud. Three out of three.

Congratulations, Jay. Thank you so much for playing.

Congrats, Algo.

Thank you so much, Denny. Take care. Right now, panel, it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Brian's summer blockbuster season is here, and a new study finds movies are more likely to feature a what in them than a woman over 60? An animal? Yes, a talking animal. According to a new study, Hollywood films are four times as likely to star a talking animal. than they are to star a woman over 60. People say this is because of sexism and ageism, but maybe the talking animals are just more talented. I mean, like, maybe the reason they cast a giraffe in the new movie about Eleanor Roosevelt is that it had the best audition.

That joke would have had to be so good for this audience to have gone with you. I thought you were in there. I was in there. I was trying. It didn't happen. I just saw Meryl Streep just shaking her head.

I kind of get it because animals have never asked me when I'm going to have a child or told me that I'm getting a little pudgy. So as much as I know that when I'm a 60-plus-year-old woman, I want to have a job, I know that maybe it's okay.

So you're saying women over 60 are a little judgy on younger women?

To me, personally, I've experienced that at times. But they also deserve rights. I love you guys, and I think what you're doing out there is amazing. Don't stop just because it's stressing me out.

Coming up, don't forget your sunscreen. It's our summer-themed Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-TO-PLAY. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR. This message comes from Cook Unity, the first chef-led meal delivery service where every meal is handcrafted in local micro-kitchens, not mass-produced in large facilities. With hundreds of dishes to choose from and over 10 different dietary preferences like high-protein, low-sodium, GLP-1, and more. Taste what happens when real, award-winning chefs make fresh, small-batched meals just for you. Go to cookunity.com slash wait or enter code WAIT before checkout to get 50% off your first order.

Support for NPR comes from IBM. On Smart Talks with IBM, Malcolm Gladwell explores how organizations are using technology to solve complex challenges in partnership with IBM.

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from npr and wbez chicago this is wait wait don't tell me the npr news quiz i'm alzo slave we're playing this week with tom papa brian babylon and rachel coster and here again is your host at the bass concert hall in austin texas peter sagal right now it is time for the

Wait, wait, don't tell me. Bluff the listener game. Call 1-888-wait-wait-to-player game in the air. Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, Peter. This is Mickey Clunk from Northfield, Minnesota. Oh, Northfield. I know it well. Home to some great universities and, of course, the Northfield Raid. That's when, if I'm not mistaken, Jesse James ended his career as an outlaw by thinking he could take a bunch of gentle Minnesotans and got his butt kicked.

Yeah, they celebrate that every September, the defeat of Jesse James Day. I've gone a few times and I've learned you should bring headphones because the reenactments get

really loud. Oh, sure. I just, I just, I just love the idea of like Minnesotans all getting their guns. Oh, I guess we're going to have to shoot you now. Oh yeah. We're going to have to shoot you in the face. Anyway, sorry, Mickey. It's great to have you with us. You're going to play the game in which you have to tell truth from fiction. Also, what is Mickey's topic? A summer twist. So summer, of course, has its classic entertainments and leisure time activities, going to the beach, alfresco dining, sweating through your shirt, even though all you're doing is alfresco dining. But this week we read about a strange little tweak on a quintessential summer experience. Our panel is going to tell you about it. Pick the one who's telling the truth and win the wait waiter of your choice on your voicemail, including, by the way, I should say, Bill Curtis. Are you ready to play? Yeah, I'm ready. All right. First, let's hear from Tom Papa.

Anyone who thinks that using insect repellent will save their summer may want to listen up or better yet, stay inside.

Research now suggests that the chemical DEET, widely used in insect repellents, may actually be attracting the mosquitoes. In other words, the mosquitoes are learning through experience that where there's DEET, there's the possibility of a blood meal. What's a blood meal? You. To a mosquito, you are nothing but a walking, talking bag of blood. Researchers are impressed that mosquitoes can smell deep with their food and still want to eat it In the same way that humans can stand alongside drunk, sweaty tourists at a Las Vegas buffet But still go back for seconds

Turns out that mosquito repellent is actually a mosquito attractant Your next summer surprise comes from Rachel Koster

After last summer's dangerous heat closed pools across the south, a pool supply company in Dry Creek, Texas, has taken matters into their own hands. To prevent dehydration amongst swimmers, Susan Daly of Susan's Pool Solutions has replaced the water in over 40 public pools with blue Gatorade. The idea to fill the pool with blue raspberry-flavored electrolytes came to Susan after last summer's heat wave forced the pool to close. Kids were fainting left and right, said lifeguard Clayton O'Hara. They were going down like dominoes. It was really stressful, but brought a lot of the lifeguards closer together, he said, smiling at Courtney Smith. There is for sure still chlorine in the water, and the Gatorade is making everyone really sticky when they get out, but no one has fainted yet this year, said Courtney. Susan Daly seems unfazed by the potential setbacks of her creation. When asked about her concerns regarding people urinating in the pool, she provided no comment, but she did scratch her head and start texting immediately after the question was asked.

preventing dehydration and swimmers by filling the swimming pools themselves with Gatorade. Your last story of a swerve in summer comes from Brian Babylon.

Matthew Riley, an engineer from Redmond, Washington, came to Southern California to get some sun. He left knowing the exact date his startup would fail. The woman who told him goes by the name of Miss Molly. For the last two summers, Miss Molly has worked from a folding chair near Tower 14, reading prophecies in the sunburns of strangers. The burn tells me something, Miss Molly said. Mostly bad things. It's summer. Nobody's burn says great news. Her hits are piling up. A peeling shoulder, that leads to divorce. A burnt nose, that's a shady contractor on its way. A man with a flawless farmer's tan, you get three words. You already know. A local dermatologist said it's deeply irresponsible and also somehow 90% accurate. Miss Molly asked only two things, respect the burn and apply aloe after. But she has one rule, she will not read her own back. She caught a glimpse of her back in the mirror one time, and she quietly said, some futures aren't yours to look at.

so which of these was an unusual twist we found on a summer standard in the news was it from Tom Papa the amazing discovery that all that mosquito repellent we put on actually is attracting the mosquitoes from Rachel Koster a woman who's devised a way to keep people from getting dehydrated while at the pool by filling the pool itself with Gatorade or from Brian Babylon a psychic in Venice Beach, California, who can accurately tell your future just from your sunburn. Which of these is the story of summer we found in the news? I think I'm going to go with the first one. You're going to go with the first one. Tom's story about all that mosquito repellent actually attracting the mosquitoes. All right, that's your choice. We spoke to someone who is very familiar

with the real story. I think we can safely say that mosquitoes are smarter than perhaps some

people give them credit for that was nicola davis she is a science correspondent at the guardian talking about mosquitoes actually coming to love your bug spray because it means you're available congratulations mickey you got it right you figured out that tom was telling the truth i mean the point for tom and of course you have won our prize the voice of anyone you may choose from our show congratulations mickey thank you thank you so much for playing with us today Bye now. Take care.

Yay, Mickey.

And now the game we call Not My Job. Alana Myers-Taylor was a star on her collegiate softball team, but didn't make the women's national. So she decided, as many ballplayers do, to move to bobsledding instead. Turned out to be a good choice, as over five different Winter Olympics, she became the most decorated American bobsledder ever. She lives now right here in Austin with her family, and we are delighted to welcome her now, Alana Myers-Tether. Welcome to Wait Wait. You came out wearing your gold medal here on stage. Do you, like, just wear it around wherever you go?

You know, only when I want to pull something on my husband, you know, tell him he's got to take out the garbage or anything. Then you pull it out and you're like, there you go.

Pulling rank, pulling rank. So, Alana, we had you on the show in 2022, back in the pandemic. At that time, you were living in Georgia. The other thing that happened since last we spoke to you was that you went on to the 2026 Olympics in Milan Cortina in Italy. And you became the gold medalist in the new sport of monobob, right? Yes. And I think I speak for all of your fans here in Austin and internationally when I say, what is a monobob?

So a monobob, bobsled has traditionally had the two-person and the four-man disciplines. Monobob is just a single person in the sled. So we push, run, jump in, and then we're in charge of navigating it all by ourselves. So no help this time.

Did it start because people got tired of their teammates on the, they're like, you know what? I'll get you guys. I'm on a monobot.

What's amazing is, so bobsledding has been around for a long time, over a century, right? And it took this long to figure out, well, maybe just one person could do it themselves? Because we discussed this the last time you were on the show. The other people, either the one pusher or the three, depending, all they do is push the sled, which is important, and then they get in and do nothing. Yep. Do nothing. Preferably. Preferably. If they do something, something has gone desperately wrong. Yes. And speaking as a driver, you're happy to be rid of that worry? Yeah, no backseat drivers.

You don't have to worry about anybody telling you where to go.

There's nothing worse than, like, in a run that could get you the championship and, like, one of your pushers is like, can we stop? I've got to use the bathroom. Just the worst. Just absolutely the worst. The other thing I found out about you since last we spoke to you is that you were one of the first elite athletes to compete against, I should say, the first female elite athlete to compete against men in a straightforward competition. Could you tell me when that happened and what exactly that was?

Yeah, so as I mentioned earlier, women have only had two disciplines. There's a two-man and a four-man, and women have only been able to compete at the Olympic level in the two-person. So they finally allowed us to compete in the four-person, and I was like, yes, let's do this. Let's get another shot to win an Olympic medal, and I competed in the four-man discipline actually with my husband. So I was the first woman to make the U.S. men's national team in a four-man sled with my husband.

Oh, wait a minute. So it wasn't just women against men. It was women and men against women and men. It was like whatever mixture people found to be most effective for their team, right?

It could have been a mixture, but it was largely women pilots with a male crew behind them and then competing against men. Really? Oh, wow.

I'm going to... A lot of stereotypes come to mind. did the men who were pushing kind of want to drive no they were pretty happy for me uh just

to be behind me and just to support me and i think it helps when your husband's back there

he's going to keep him in line so really that's right and i and i've i've seen your husband he's he's pretty swole yeah he's like the conditioning coach he doubles as my body

guard too yeah right yeah but that's an amazing date night though hey like babe let's go ahead get this medal right quick you know i'm saying you go to you know that's what i was thinking

like do you just get dressed in the outfits just for fun no but it is the perfect date night because

you can't bring the kids so you know the kids can't be in the sled so you know it's me time

is there us time is there beef between mono mono bobs and like the luge people is it like is it sort of like the jets and the sharks like luge versus mono bob no actually uh we get along

with losers really well. But losers like the country club of sports and bobsleds more blue-collar sports. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Hold on. I didn't even... Sorry to hold on.

Okay. So you mentioned you had kids. You and your husband have two kids. We're now raising them here in Austin. In fact, you... Is it right that you won one of your gold medals at one Olympics while you were pregnant? Yes. Yep. Yep.

Didn't know it at the time. So the bobsled have five people?

In a way.

It was a two-person bobsled, but yes, technically you had three people.

And I know it's rather difficult to do here in Austin, but have you ever taken your kids sledding?

Haven't taken them sledding, but the nanny has. Not in Austin, but the nanny has.

Very Lugy. Oh, yeah.

Very Lugy. Lugy and boozy.

I can't just be on a normal sled. Like, I have a bobsled. I can't just be on a radio flyer. Really? Yeah, that's for losers. You don't think you could do that? Yeah, no. I'm not getting behind any sled. I'm not driving.

Fair enough. Do you ever get free food if you wear your medal?

Well, actually When you were with us before You told us that When your first gold medal Which was in the I want to say the 2010 Olympics Yes, bronze You won a bronze medal And you were like You were so young and hungry And I guess maybe thinking That was impressive Remind us if that worked It did work It did work That's great Got a free frosty at Wendy's So you're much more established You're a legend in the sport A record setter Do you still try that?

Haven't tried it because I think the stigma with the gold medal is people think you can pay for a meal. So they expect you to pay for a meal. It is made of gold. And they expect you to tip well. So no more free food.

Oh, yeah, I put that gold medal away real quick. Oh, yeah. You take off the gold, you take out the old bronze so you can get, you know, get some comps.

Do you ever wear it to the gym so people get off the equipment for you? That's a good try, but I definitely will try that because that will be, usually there's a lot of lines. I train in public gyms, train in the local rec clubs, so there is always a wait for gym equipment, so I definitely need to try that out.

Well, Alana, it is great to have you with us again, and this time we've asked you here to play a game we're calling Slider Meet Slider. So you are a champion of the sliding sports. We thought we'd ask you about the original Slider White Castle hamburgers. Answer two to three questions, you will win our prize for one of our listeners, the voice of anyone they may choose in their voicemail. are you ready to play? Let's go. All right. Alzo, who is Alana playing for this time?

Crystal Craig right here in Austin, Texas.

That's very exciting. And I just want to ask that I know you're competitive, but I also know you're used to routines. Would you like to do this competition with your husband crouching behind you? Yes. Okay. He's way better at trivia than I ever. Okay. Well, here we go. So here's your First question, when the first White Castle restaurant opened in Wichita, Kansas in 1921, the founders wanted to establish with the potential customers a very specific reputation. They wanted to be known as what? A, the most pro-monarchy restaurant. B, the restaurant with the world's smallest food. Or C, the most sanitary restaurant in town. Oh, gosh.

I really haven't been to White Castle in a long time So I'm going to go with C You're right, that was the thing

This was only a few years After Upton Sinclair's book The Jungle had come out Nobody wanted to eat ground beef They were afraid of what was in it So the white walls and the stainless steel of the White Castles Were supposed to assure you of its cleanliness Here's your next question Once a year White Castle goes all out to celebrate a particular holiday, which is it? A, in December, they offer the meat menorah where you can get eight sliders, one for each night of Hanukkah. B, on Valentine's Day, White Castle becomes Love Castle, a fine dining restaurant complete with tablecloths, candles, and romantic music with which you can enjoy your meal. Or C, on Halloween, one in ten burgers has a razor blade hidden.

Well, since I heard a couple of cheers for B, I'm going to go with B. That's right.

The Love Castle. This is a huge thing. Tens of thousands of people show up at White Castle for Valentine's Day. You can also get the discounted Sloppy Joe six-packs for some reason. Here's your last question. You go for perfect, as you have been in pretty much everything else. White Castle has innovated to keep up with modern times, as in which of these? A, thanks to a partnership with Vitamix, you can now get any White Castle burger as a smoothie. B, 100 locations will soon have their burgers flipped by a short-order cook robot named Flippy. Or C, they're catering to Botox enthusiasts by promising, quote, we're sure there's botulism in our food.

All those are real possibilities.

I will agree that there are possibilities.

Okay. We'll go with B. Yes, Flippy the Robot.

Pretty soon your White Castle burger will be uncouched by human hands until it arrives in yours.

Alzo, how did Alana do in our quiz? She gets a, wait, wait, don't tell me, gold medal. Three out of three.

Alana Myers-Taylor is a six-time world champion bobsledder who won gold at this year's Olympic Games in Milan. Alana Myers-Taylor, thank you so much for joining us here on Wave. Thanks for having me. In just a minute, we finally find the hidden valley in our listener, Limerick Challenge. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us in the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

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This message is from AT&T with your summer essential, the iPhone 17 Pro. Its center stage front camera auto-adjusts the frame to fit everyone into group selfies. Right now at AT&T, ask how you can get iPhone 17 Pro on them with eligible trade-in. Requires eligible plan. Terms and restrictions apply, subject to change. Visit att.com slash iPhone for details.

From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Alzo Slade. We're playing this week with Brian Babylon, Tom Papa, and Rachel Koster. And here again is your host at the Bass Concert Hall in Austin, Texas, Peter Sagal. Thank you, Alzo.

In just a minute, we find out if Alzo was lying when he put Ph.D. in limericks in his resume. It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Rachel, Club Med is about to open its first ever beach resort on the coast of South Africa, but there's one little problem. They have to figure out a way to keep what away from their guests?

The history. Yeah.

All right? All right?

That's very funny. You can't min in black your way out of this one.

No, no, no. I'm sorry. No, no. I'll give you a hint. At this resort, Jaws isn't just a movie night. Sharks. Yes, sharks is the answer. Man-eating sharks. This will be the very first Club Med beach resort on the coast of South Africa, and that's because the coast is home to three different species of man-eating sharks. Ad also explains the new resort's ad campaign, wake up to beachside yoga, then a surfing lesson, then survivors have a drink by the pool.

i think that the sharks that are there should be able to stay there and not be pushed away well

that's in fact what's going on is they're like okay these sharks are here we're trying to open this beach resort um a lot of people saying well you shouldn't do that in fact a lot of people are saying you just let the sharks alone in fact there is one proposal to put up a shark net right but environmentalists environmentalists say no that doesn't work those nets they just kill other endangered species and sometimes the sharks get stuck inside the net which makes them more angry right so then the sharks are like well i bet we're in we're basically we're in prison now but

at least the food's good yeah they're seeing a club med sign and they all you can eat yeah pretty

much all inclusive all inclusive right

rachel great news if you're jealous of the amish this week we heard about a new concept where people are encouraged to take a rumspringa after what?

Can I please have a hint? You may. College, just college.

I'm sorry, you're saying?

College, high school.

After college, after high school. No, no, no. That's for you.

typical. After their first year at their internship. Sometimes you need to take a load off

after. It's after their first thing, but that thing usually ends unexpectedly or not what they wanted it to happen. Divorce. Yes, divorce. You got it. Sorry. A writer in the cut is recommending anyone who has recently divorced to take a divorce rumspringa, quote unquote, where you do whatever you want for a while after your divorce. It's a groundbreaking idea. people normally are so measured and regular after a divorce.

I think that the Amish teach a valuable lesson, but it should just be that after a divorce, just turn your own butter. Do something kind of simple. Knit all your clothing. You don't have to be a slut at 55. Just make a bunch of butter for your toast that you bake on your own. It's simple, and then your kids won't have their hearts broken again.

that was deep that was a beautiful story that was beautiful to think about to feel for you yeah that was really nice yeah

but really they're just slapping a kind of fun label on something we all know people do and they shouldn't it's like yeah you're not taking a sabbatical for personal growth you just didn't go to work for a year coming up it's lightning fill in the blank but first it's the game we have to listen for the rhyme if you'd like to play on air call or leave a message at 1-888-wait-wait that's 1-888-924-8924 you can catch us most weeks back at the studebaker theater in downtown chicago or come see us on the road we'll be at the riverside theater in milwaukee on july 9th and in sonoma county in northern california on july 30th for tickets and info to all our live events go to nprpresents.org

hi around wait wait don't tell me hi this is sebastian calling from mendon vermont mendon vermont okay what do you do there i am a student success advisor at vermont state university's castleton campus and as of 16 days ago i am a new father whoa 16 days oh my gosh wow how do you how do you have time to like call into radio shows i have a wonderfully supportive um partner and wife who knows this is a lifelong dream of mine and so she's making this possible for me wow that is lovely wow that's a love language well

congratulations mazel tov and welcome to the show uh sebastian you're going to play our limerick challenge alzo slayed for the first time as our official judge square keeper and limericist limerick reader he's going to read you three news related limericks with the last word or phrase missing your job fill that in two times out of three do that you will win our prize you ready

to go i am ready all right here is your first limerick alzo to woo buyers for homes our plot thickens they see country life their pulse quickens their interest is spurred with egg-laying birds

we are selling new homes with some chickens yes chickens luxury homes are now being sold with chickens and chicken coops included you can instantly live the instagram fantasy of gathering your own sustainable eggs from your chickens for breakfast and then in the afternoon euthanizing them when they all get bird flu. Chickens are fun. Do you have chickens? Have you had chickens?

No, I never had chickens, but I grew up in New Jersey and my dad would take us into the city to see a thing called the dancing chicken. And it was in a arcade booth and there'd be a chicken in there and you put a quarter in and they'd play music and the chicken would start to dance. When did you grow up? 1926?

Ah, come see the dancing chicken.

That was a fun time for the Papa family. Until we found out that the quarter actually turned on the music and also electrified the floor. No! Yeah. And we cried all the way home to New Jersey. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. I wonder what that chicken's doing now.

Not much.

Here is your next limerick, Sebastian. There's a calendar Rome has released of frock-wearing, good-looking beasts. With collar and stole, they're just acting a role. The models they used are not... Priests?

Priests, yes. This week, we were shocked to learn that the guy in the cover of the famous sexy priest calendar on sale in shops all over Rome, Italy, is actually not a priest. He's just a regular guy. Well, he's not regular. He's hot.

so this calendar in question you've seen them if you've been to Rome it's it's come into the spotlight because people have discovered that several of the 12 priests in it are not actually members of the clergy it's somebody sounds like somebody you know had the idea of course do one hot priest for every month and they ran out of real ones by the time they got to February

but I'm curious on who's into like sexy priest calendars I can tell you exactly who tell me A guy just having a job and believing in something is honestly kind of awesome.

I think it would be cute to have like a mix of hot priests, but then like fun priests, you know? Yeah. Good personality priests. Yeah, like playing baseball or riding a little pony. Yeah.

All right, Sebastian, here is your last limerick. In Europe, they're going to blanch at our buttermilk sauce avalanche. We will shower the blessing of creamy white dressing. We are preaching the gospel of ranch.

Ranch, yes, this week Hidden Valley Ranch announced they were hiring two ranch dressing ambassadors whose job would be to travel around Europe to promote ranch dressing, America's number one cultural export.

Peter, this is, as you know, I live in Europe like four months out of the year. Every time I go to Europe, I take some swishy-sweet blunts and some ranch dressing in my suitcase. Every time. Because they don't have ranch over there. They don't have ranch. They don't have, like, dairy creamers. So I have, like, American poison stuff in my suitcase every time.

It's a weird thing to say I live in Europe four months of the year and I love ranch. Yes. You're a very interesting character.

I'm interested, though. I love ranch dressing. I just worry about when the war with Europe starts and we have to pull our ranchbassadors from the ranch embassy.

Alzo, how did Sebastian do in our quiz? Sebastian, the new father, can celebrate because he has a perfect score, three out of three. Yeah.

Yay, congratulations.

Thank you, thank you.

Thank you so much for playing, Sebastian. Take care. Thank you. It was a dream come true.

Woo-hoo!

Bye-bye.

Support for NPR comes from IBM.

On Smart Talks with IBM, host Malcolm Gladwell speaks with leaders who are pushing the boundaries of AI and technology in partnership with IBM.

Hello, hello. I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I sat down with Alon Cohen, who leads research and development at UFC, to discuss the complexity of using technology to analyze fight data.

With kick to the head, it makes contact with the outset of my arm, which I brought up. In our world, that's a blocked strike. Yeah. But teaching a computer what exactly that means and when and how. Like, when my arm is up, that's a block. When my arm is down and hits my shoulder, that's not. It's those nuances that proved incredibly difficult for machines to be able to handle for a very, very long time.

That is, until IBM entered the octagon.

Listen to Smart Talks with IBM wherever you get your podcasts.

Now onto our final game, lightning fill-in-the-blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer now worth two points.

Alzo, can you give us the scores? Sure thing. Rachel and Brian are tied up at two. Tom Papa in the lead with three. Okay. So that means Rachel and Brian are tied.

Let's say, Brian, why don't you go first? Okay. On Thursday, several passengers of the cruise ship that had a blank outbreak left quarantine. HannaVirus. HannaVirus, that's right. Following voting on Tuesday, Karen Bass advanced to a runoff in the race for mayor of blank. Right. Los Angeles. This week, a cop in Chicago was caught blanking while on paid medical leave for a knee injury. Bike riding. No going horseback riding, lifting five bales of hay, and moving a 1,200-pound dumpster.

I can't believe you didn't get that one.

This week, the San Antonio Spurs and New York Knicks faced off in the first two games of the blank finals. NBA finals. Ride on. On Thursday, scientists said intense solar storms may mean that the blanks could be visible from 23 states. All the solar flares. Yeah, the northern lights will give that to you. This week, authorities are warning people to not throw their old car batteries in the trash because they keep blanking. they keep exploding not quite they keep making the garbage trucks explode oh wow see the chemicals inside your car battery are totally safe they will not

catch fire, or explode, unless, of course, you were to squeeze them in a powerful hydraulic press surrounded by a bunch of garbage. Wow. So exploding.

Alzo, how did Brian Babylon do in our quiz? He did all right. He got four right for eight points, total of ten, and the lead. All right.

Very good. Rachel? Rachel, you're up next, fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the House voted to block the administration from ordering more strikes against blank.

Iran.

Right, on Monday, Trump named a man with no background in intelligence to be the acting director of blank.

FBI, CIA, SOB, I don't know.

National Intelligence Director. This week, paleontologists in China discovered another species of blank. Dinosaur. Right, on Tuesday, analysts said that the $75 billion IPO for private space company blank would be the largest in history.

SpaceX.

Right. This week, Alaskan Senator Dan Sullivan learned he'd be facing off against a man named Blank in the Republican primary.

Grizzly bear.

No, a man whose name is also Dan Sullivan. On Monday, Martin Scorsese faced backlash after saying he supported the use of Blank during pre-production. AI. Right. This week, police in Massachusetts responded to reports of a man in camouflage standing in a lawn holding a bazooka instead found Blank.

Um, a kid just doing his own thing.

No, a landscaper holding a leaf blower. Police arrived in the scene expecting to find a lunatic waving around a bazooka, but instead found a landscaper just doing his job. It's a crazy mistake to make because everybody knows the best way to get rid of leaves in your driveway is to take them out one by one.

Alzo, how did Rachel do in our quiz? She did the exact same thing that Brian Babylon did. Four right for eight points. Now they're tied with a total of ten each. All right, so how many then does Tom Papa need to win? Tom, just four. That's all you need, man. That's all you need, man. Don't say it like that. That's all you need.

All right, Tom, this is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, the acting attorney general said the administration had abandoned President Trump's $1.8 billion blank. Slush fund. Right, anti-weaponization fund. On Thursday, former National Security Advisor Blank pled guilty to mishandling classified documents. Bolton. Yes. According to a new study, bumbleblanks show problem-solving skills at the level of chimps. Bumblebees? Bumblebees, yes.

Man, bumbleblanks. Come on.

You better get four.

Shh, I'm playing.

This week, a police detective in South Carolina was fired after he pulled his gun on another officer for blanking. Farting. No, for microwaving fish in the police department break room. It smelled like a fart. On Wednesday, the U.N. issued a warning about extreme weather caused by a so-called super blank. By a super storm. Super El Nino. According to a new study, over three-fourths of Americans want to require warning labels on ultra-processed blank. Food. Yes, ultra-processed foods. After participating in a new tradition of jumping into a pool to end your wedding reception, a recent bride warned other brides to make sure their dress does not blank. Doesn't become see-through. No, doesn't try to drown you. Shelby Crawford and her new husband jumped into the pool at the end of the wedding reception while the guests watched and cheered, and then kept cheering for what they really should have realized was too long. Alzo, did Tom Papa do well enough to win? Man, listen.

Tom, by the hairs of your chinny-chin-chin, you got four right for eight more points, which give you one more point than Brian and Rachel, so you win the game.

In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict After tarps off, what'll be the next big thing in baseball stadiums? Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord. Philip Godica writes our limericks. Our ops manager is Jasira Vardak. B.J. Liederman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian King. A special thanks to Miles Dornbos. Also thanks to Mohanad Elshahy this week. Peter Gwynn is deep in the heart of Chicago. Emma Choi is our vibe curator. Technical directionist from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production manager, that's Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chilag and the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Michael Danforth. Now, panel, what will be the next big trend at baseball stadiums? Rachel Koster.

Tushy's out too.

Ryan Babylon. It's going to be gloves off night where people just fight and it's going to be played on the White House lawn. And Tom Papa. Wieners out at the Westminster Dog Show. And if any of that happens, we'll ask you about it on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

Give it up for Alzo Slade, the new big man on our campus. Thanks also to Brian Babylon, Rachel Costner, and Tom Papa. Thanks to the staff and crew at the Bass Concert Hall. And special thanks to our friends at KUT here in Austin. Thanks to our fabulous audience who came out to see us in Austin. And thanks to you for listening wherever you might be. I'm Peter Sagan. We'll see you next week back in Chicago. This is NPR.

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